Lutz Pfannenstiel: he kidnapped a penguin (with Jason Manford)

14:46Lutz Pfannenstiel:in the entertainment area after Yaya's off at Belfrou I love that he was doing that in a Covid bubble as well

14:54Jason Manford:I think that might have actually been the Ruly Broke yeah that was the actual event no they've been isolating yeah you'll have to do a Soccer Aid episode yeah

15:07Lutz Pfannenstiel:alright well back on the less glamorous climbs of Wimbledon Common. So Lutz is stripped naked. He's running laps in front of pensioners and kids. And the pranks keep coming. So another time they go out on the piss, he gets absolutely hammered and wakes up in Newcastle. And they just basically, when he was so smashed, they just took him to the station and just stuffed him on a train to Newcastle. The other players? Yeah, his teammates. And I think, I don't know if that one was on like a match day. I mean, he's playing for the reserves, so it's probably not a... His whole lot. Well, yeah, crikey.

15:36Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, I think that's par for the course. yeah I mean that's it's fairly soft compared to some of the stuff they got up to was there one where they like stripped someone naked and strapped them to the roof of a car and drove down the A3 A3 yeah what is the point when they've gone too far is it death have you watched the Crazy Gang documentary I haven't because it's actually it's quite dark in places oh yeah there's basically people being like they just beat me up every single day it was horrible yeah and John Fashner who comes across as a complete like Hannibal Lecter figure right yeah because he's sort of sort of get that vibe yeah he's sort of softly spoken and finding it sort of like, he's sort of giggling with joy at the thought of,

16:12Jason Manford:yeah, it goes too far. Hearing a Wooger whispered in your ear at two o 'clock in the morning.

16:19Lutz Pfannenstiel:To be fair, Lutz does also get involved. So on one occasion, they have this trialist coming from Nigeria. And obviously London's freezing for this bloke, who's used to much hotter weather. So Lutz very kindly lends him a pair of thermal undershorts to warm him up on the training park. but he sprays them with deep heat all over the crotch and this poor bloke makes it about 10 minutes in before he just has to run off the pitch in tears because his balls are on fire poor bloke poor guy when you're on trial didn't pass the trial whole career slightly ruined by that you've literally ruined my career I hope this was funny Hewlett he spent a whole year at Wimbledon Fanning Steele but he's not getting in the first team they've got Neil Sullivan in goal I don't think he's even getting on the bench And so once he realizes it's not going to happen there, he decides to move on.

17:08Lutz Pfannenstiel:Not very far, though, right? No, I mean, he actually stays in the Premier League. He joins Nottingham Forest. And by his standards, he stays there quite long. He's there for two years. I say playing for Nottingham Forest. He's in the reserves again. But on the plus side, whilst in Nottingham, he starts dating the lovely Hetty, who's a TV journalist. and through her he sort of moves up the ladder in terms of glamour starts going to these music events award ceremonies rubbing shoulders with the Spice Girls he once threatens to beat up Mark Owen from Take That oh really he's making eyes at Hetty oh wow I mean out of

17:46Jason Manford:Take That he's the one you could have you'd back yourself I think so yeah I reckon not Robbie no Robbie who knows what yeah at that point he's feral Gary Barlow Gary Barlow's quite quite dangerous isn't he yeah I think Gary could turn yeah I think he's absolutely amazing and then suddenly he'd be pinned down on the floor this is my idea of a good day or whatever

18:11Jason Manford:digging his fingers into your eyes

18:14Lutz Pfannenstiel:did you say he's with the Spice Girls as well he's rubbing shoulders with the Spice Girls he's near the Spice Girls in the same room so he's sort of he's Britpop sort of yeah in Britannia yeah it's that era really have you ever seen in the background of a photo a sort of very tall bloke with long hair. Carrying a penguin. Yeah. But Hetty's clearly impressed by all of that, him threatening to take that. And they end up moving in together. His reserve Nottingham Forest. His reserve, yeah. Come on, Hetty. Yeah. You can do better than this. Mark Owen's making eyes at you. Yeah. Read the signals. But they're head over heels for each other and they end up moving in together in this flat in Edmonton, North London.

18:54Lutz Pfannenstiel:So he's actually commuting every day up to Nottingham. But where they are, it's a bit of a rough area. And they live in the flat below this guy called Steve, who's quite a tough guy. He's really muscly. He's got a sort of neck melts into his body. And one day, Lutz comes back from training and on the pavement outside their flat, there's a chalk outline of a body.

19:18Jason Manford:Oh, God.

19:19Lutz Pfannenstiel:And he goes inside and the upstairs hallway is covered in blood. And it turns out that Steve had met this guy at the pub and they'd come back to his flat for funeral beers and the guy had pulled a knife on him and this fight had broken out and Steve had ended up stabbing him three times, killing him. He stumbled outside and died on the street outside. So Steve is arrested for murder and is in custody for about a week. But then the police basically realised that he was self-defence and he's released and just moves back into the flat upstairs. As you were.

19:54Jason Manford:Just thinking, well, why did I move out of those two lesbians? Bring them back.

20:01Lutz Pfannenstiel:Apparently, Lewis is just terrified of this guy, as you would be. But he's nice enough as an angel. Every night, like, I'm here and leave. Apparently, Steve often takes their parcels in if they're not at home. And then he'll come round and knock on the door to drive them back. Lewis says he, like, whenever he sees him through the peephole, he just hides under the bed until Steve's gone. yeah you know that moment where they say where your parcel's delivered and you just you see which flat it is

20:29Jason Manford:yeah it's like a photo and it's just he's got a knife just like just near his feet yeah it's alright Steve it's fine I don't need those air freshers keep them keep them Steve can have them he needs them he could use them to be fair yeah and the soap

20:46Lutz Pfannenstiel:yeah so he he spends a couple of years at Forest but ends up leaving in 1997 having again never made a single first season appearance he's got a vibe of that

20:54Jason Manford:who's the guy from that episode who never actually played football do you remember that oh Kaiser yeah Kaiser there's a little vibe of that going on here constantly moving clubs never playing never fully playing that would actually explain it all yeah and a keeper I reckon you'd get away with it a lot more couldn't you yeah true you're not going to play yeah so there's probably

21:12Lutz Pfannenstiel:a lot of keepers that you see them sometimes the ones that have just done their whole career as the third choice keeper yeah it's a weird life isn't it yeah but I actually as someone who's not that competitive that's probably my dream job you don't have to do anything third choice so it's alright money well we've got the guy at City

21:29Jason Manford:I can't think of his name oh what who's Scott Carson Scott Carson Scott Carson yeah who's like on all the photos of winning the Champions League he's like

21:38Lutz Pfannenstiel:he broke I think Maldini had the record for biggest gap between Champions Leagues and then Scott Carson broke it because he did it in Liverpool 2005 and then City

21:46Jason Manford:yeah so he's what a career what a career but he's just and also but he's just so well liked they're like that's my dream football career yeah yeah definitely just for morale yeah I'm there exactly

21:59Lutz Pfannenstiel:I'm a mascot like Kaiser

22:00Jason Manford:yeah exactly and so

22:02Lutz Pfannenstiel:Forest he doesn't play he doesn't make a single appearance I don't know who the backup is but there's a pecking order anyway so after that he's got to go looking for some first team games he goes to South Africa he plays for Orlando Pirates who are like massive in South Africa and again he doesn't play I think he's only there he does oh sorry yeah that's actually that's when he oh sorry he like goes there and he's like he plays in front of a packed stadium and he's like I don't like this fuck this no actually actually the opposite he's like I'm not going back to reserve team football right oh okay so he gets a bit of ambition a bit of drive from it that's good because he's seen what being playing football playing football right that's better yeah he's just like after that yeah no he's just after that he's like I'm not going back to reserve team football I'm going to take any first team opportunity that comes my way.

22:51Lutz Pfannenstiel:And boy, does he live by that rule, because the next job is Semba Wang Rangers in Singapore, where he is going to be first choice keeper, and they're going to give him quite good money, a nice apartment, so he's like, alright, let's do this. He leaves the lovely Hetty at the airport, promises, you know, it's not going to be long. She's moved in with Steve. Yeah. Leaves her in Steve's clutches. And he says, look, this isn't goodbye, it's just au revoir, we back, I'll see you soon, but he never sees her again. That's it for Hetty. He was not a keeper. Not a keeper. There you go. Little panto joke ready for you there.

23:27Lutz Pfannenstiel:And off he goes to Singapore to the Lion City. Moves into a nice apartment. But before he's even done a training session, another offer comes in from China. And it's a better offer. It's 200 grand a year if he passes a trial. And you think he would have learned his lesson about trials already, but he hasn't. So he tells the club in Singapore, I've got a personal emergency. I just need to nip off for a couple of weeks. and they're like okay fine and off he goes and as soon as he sets foot on the plane he realizes he's made a mistake it's like a rickety old thing it's full of boxes with chickens in it live chickens it's like it's like blowing in the wind this plane like very fragile and they're going up into the mountains middle of nowhere in china he's like where am i and it turns out it's this training camp for trialists and it is a brutal boot camp so every day sort of 10 hour cross-country runs through the mountains they're woken up each morning at 6 a.m by a screaming Chinese man.

24:19Lutz Pfannenstiel:He kicks open their door and bangs on a sheet of metal with a spoon, just screaming. So it's intense. 200 grand a year, though. Yeah, well, you've got to pass the trial. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. He doesn't. No. He sticks out for two weeks and then packs it in.

24:32Jason Manford:And can he still get back to Singapore? Yeah. Yeah, luckily. A few.

24:36Lutz Pfannenstiel:He's got a contingency. He goes back to Singapore and he actually gets some game time there. He's playing really well, but his life, his peaceful existence is interrupted when he has this house guest come. It's like a friend of a friend. Doesn't like the bloke. We've all been there. Yes. Normally when you have like a really annoying house guest, you just vow never to have them again, right? You just stick it out. And then once they're gone, just don't have them again. But Lutz wants revenge. And so on the guy's last night of his stay, the guy says, do you know what? I really want to get a tattoo in Chinese characters.

25:09Lutz Pfannenstiel:I've always wanted one. Will you take me to a tattoo parlor? So they go to this tattoo parlor and the guy decides the phrase he wants in Chinese is power and strength, you know, something masculine and aspirational. And so the tattoo artist is like, okay, yeah, I can do that. Goes to get his kit and Lutz follows the guy into his room and offers him 300 quid and says, listen, instead of power and strength, can you tattoo the word cocksucker? Right. And he does. But obviously it's in Chinese. So his annoying house guest is none the wiser. And he goes off, he's really happy with his tat. And it's not until four years later that the bloke walks into a Chinese takeaway and the guy working there says, you know you've got cocksucker tattooed on you?

25:52Lutz Pfannenstiel:Apparently the bloke's absolutely furious. He rings Lutz and screams at him. So I guess he's worked out that it was Lutz. My mate's got one a bit like that. He tried to get, I think it's in Arabic, he tried to get something like Endeavour to Persevere, something lame. And they just wrote, I try hard. That's really good. In Arabic. Kind of means the same thing. yeah yeah and it's actually on every level yeah in Singapore he does find love once again so he meets this Indonesian girl who he loves and you know this is a serious relationship they date for a number of years she then follows him to around Europe he plays in Finland Germany he's everywhere and at some point the Indonesian FA get wind of this and they realise that there's an opportunity here to you know get a decent handy goalkeeper so they say to him look if you marry your girl girlfriend, we'll give you an Indonesian passport and you can play for the national team.

26:47Lutz Pfannenstiel:Oh, here we go. Which, you know, every footballer dreams are playing on the international stage. You can play in some quite good tournaments, I reckon, Asian Cup. Yeah, I think it was just before the 2002 World Cup as well. So he was like, if we qualify. If. They didn't. Yeah. So he goes ahead with it. They get married. And, you know, for her, this is amazing as well, because she's now going out with the goalkeeper of her national side. So she's married to the goalkeeper. It's a win-win. yeah you think so and he plays in a friendly I can't see how this can backfire lads I think also I think I might have this wrong but at some point he's told that if he wants to stick with this he has to give up his German nationality which is a bit more of a commitment and that might explain why having played a friendly for Indonesia he then gets cold feet and decides I don't want to do this anymore so undeclares himself for Indonesia gets rid of the passport and yeah just leaves his wife behind and the wife as well

27:42Jason Manford:he's got some commitment problems yes yeah what's he running from yeah

27:50Lutz Pfannenstiel:she's really done badly out of this isn't she married to the national team goalkeeper and then divorced with yeah it shouldn't be that easy for someone to get a nationality I think for international football marry someone yeah I didn't even know

28:05Jason Manford:that was possible to be fair

28:06Lutz Pfannenstiel:giving up his German passport was quite a big deal yeah yeah yeah

28:10Jason Manford:I've recently they've got an irish passport and it does it's uh my my mum's irish and uh yeah it just make a hell of a difference especially post brexit oh my god lovely meeting that other queue you're just in the quick queue yeah and also they're just happier to see you you know what i mean they're just you know the brick you they're a bit like all right if you start saying i'm not english i'm irish i've not got that far no we're not that far the rest of the world i noticed i did play for the rest of the world yeah i mean that's because there's so many players who play for england and they're like, they're desperate for anybody.

28:39Jason Manford:Like, have you ever had a pizza? Right, okay, you can be, you can play for the rest of the world. Like, they're so desperate. It's partly in your eye here in midfield. Yeah, but, yeah, no, it's good in that, you do feel very smug in that. Yeah, you've got one as well, haven't you? I've got an Irish passport now. It's great. I'm like, yeah, fuck up, you English bastards. Then you've got to wait for your family on the other side, of course, because they're still in that queue, yeah. You get to go to the toilet quicker. Yeah, Yeah, that's what they put pubs in airports for.

29:32Jason Manford:Max$100 cash back per month. My day kicks off with a refreshing Celsius energy drink. Then straight to the gym. Pre-K pickup, back home to meal prep. Time for my fire station shift. One more Celsius, gotta keep the lights on. When the three alarm hits, I'm ready. Celsius. Live. Fit. Go. Grab a cold refreshing Celsius at your local retailer or locate now at Celsius.com. They say you should learn something new every day. Like how you should only drink Jägermeister at zero degrees Fahrenheit. Ice cold. Like those frozen cavemen they find. Which makes you wonder, what would a caveman think of Jägermeister?

30:09Jason Manford:Well, if you served it warm, he'd probably throw it in your face, say, Oonga Boonga, and storm off. And nobody wants that. So drink it cold or not at all. Jägermeister. Damn, that's cold. Drink responsibly. Jägermeister liqueur, 35 % alcohol by volume.

30:23Lutz Pfannenstiel:Imported by Masked Jägermeister, U.S., White Plains, New York. So there's no Indonesian passport, though, for old alerts. and instead he heads back to Singapore actually and joins a club called Gay Lang where he's the first choice keeper again. He's playing really well, although he is a bit more interested in partying, enjoying his single life again as well. Starts modelling for Armani, strutting around the city in designer clothes. He's actually quite a big name there. I was about to ask how, but I guess... Yeah, I mean, it's top flight football in Singapore. Is he making good money? He's making decent money there as well.

30:59Lutz Pfannenstiel:And you're big fish. Big fish in quite a small pond, yeah. But he's about to have a very unfortunate meeting. So he bumps into this Indian businessman at a petrol station and the guy ends up following him home. And he's a big fan of Lutz, just always wants to talk about him, talk with him about football. But then he keeps on turning up. Wherever Lutz goes, this Indian businessman happens to be there as well. and they get to know each other and the guy starts asking him for match tips. What Lutz doesn't realise though is that the guy is placing bets based on what he says. And Lutz actually, he's a professional footballer.

31:41Lutz Pfannenstiel:He always says that he's going to win these matches. The guy's, you know, you're playing whoever it is the next day. Lutz is always, always confident. Unfortunately though, it doesn't always come off and the guy starts getting annoyed and he decides one time that he's going to take matters into his own hand. So Lutz has told him that they're going to win this match. And the night before, the two best players of the opponents are attacked with a hockey stick, they're dragged out of this cab, beaten up, and they're out of the game. So that's their two best players gone. And the following day, Lutz's side win easily.

32:19Lutz Pfannenstiel:Told you we'd win. Yeah. But the attack is eventually traced back to this Indian businessman who's arrested. We're not finding out what his business is here. We're just saying businessman. Businessman. Yeah. We know what his business is. The business, it turns out, is match fixing. Yeah. But he's actually a relatively small fish in the world of Singaporean match fixing.

32:43Jason Manford:Which feels also a small fish in the world of match fixing.

32:48Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, it is. But apparently these leagues are relatively easy to do it in because the players are on pretty low salaries in general. Lutz is on a bit of a better one. Is it a bit obvious when like a million quid gets lumped on? Yeah, well, apparently the authorities were already tracking it a bit. And then this hockey stick attack happened and probably big sums were also lumped on. Lutz is team winning. And they trace it back to this guy, but they realise that he's pretty low down the pecky order. and they make him an offer that in exchange for impunity he can hand over the names of the players who he's been getting to fix matches which the guy obviously jumps at that opportunity he doesn't strike me as a no he's not a man of integrity my word is my bond

33:37Lutz Pfannenstiel:yeah that's what happens when you hang out with match fixers they do contrast flags who follow you home from petrol stations shortly Steve would have told you that stop bringing weird blokes back so the guy hands over to the authorities a list of eight names and on that list is Lutz Vanenstiel and actually also his roommate who's also a footballer a guy called Mickey Mickey? doesn't get a surname he's Dutch actually and one night Mickey and Lutz are at home they've got their feet up watching a movie when there's a bang at the door and the anti-corruption police kick the door in, turn their apartment upside down looking for evidence and throw them in the slammer.

34:24Lutz Pfannenstiel:What evidence you could find on that?

34:26Jason Manford:Texts. Yeah. You have to turn the flat upside down. You could have just asked.

34:35Lutz Pfannenstiel:Maybe a brown envelope of cash. Yeah, yeah. Or like lists of games to fix if you're an idiot. Hockey sticks. yeah hockey sticks apparently they'd already raided the the Indian business where they raided his house and there was a little hockey stick really so that was how they covered in blood I mean that is that's real that's that's 101 isn't it yeah destroy the evidence come on guys so Mickey and Lutz are dragged into the station where they're interrogated for 28 hours straight Singaporean police notoriously tough not a country you want

35:07Jason Manford:to be banged up in no yeah but then after his years of DJing all night and waking up yeah 28 hours it's nothing I've done this for fun, mate.

35:15Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah. They're pretty rough, though, with him. I don't know if he experienced this in the Kuala Lumpur club scene, but the police, they punch him, they strip him naked, they slam his fingers in the drawer, scream in his ear, telling him that he has to confess. Gosh. They actually read out the Indian businessman's confession that names him and say, look, we've got you on this. You have to confess. but still Lurtis is adamant I didn't do anything wrong I just I said we were going to win these matches I'm just a confident footballer so he his statement sticks to his his line that he didn't do anything wrong unfortunately though Mickey fucks up his testimony and says that they'd agreed to get some money from the bet if this guy won Mickey they were match fixing so I don't so my the impression that Lutz gives is that basically this guy had approached them and said like, you're playing so-and-so tomorrow.

36:17Lutz Pfannenstiel:Who's going to win? And they'd said like, yeah, we're going to win. It's going to be a big win. And the guy had been like, great, I'm going to put some money on. I'll give you some if you do. Which is pretty like, and they probably saw like, ah, yeah, great, nice. But I feel like

36:33Jason Manford:match fixing can't be you saying we're going to win. It can only be we're going to lose and I'm going to be the player that makes that happen. Like you said, all footballers are expecting to win. Or it's like,

36:45Lutz Pfannenstiel:there's going to be a corner in the 20th minute. Yeah, I mean,

36:47Jason Manford:like now where you can bet on, you know, which a keeper would be good

36:50Lutz Pfannenstiel:at fixing it. Yeah, but I just feel like,

36:52Jason Manford:I feel like he's been hard done to.

36:54Lutz Pfannenstiel:He feels exactly the same. I'll tell you that. But they, the pair of them, after this confession is what they're calling it from Mickey, the two of them get thrown in prison awaiting trial and it's grim. it's a cockroach infested cell they're shitting in a hole with 20 other inmates it's 40 degree heat it's absolutely horrible it's one of the worst places on earth to be in jail yeah because they'll sort of like deliberately make it

37:21Jason Manford:yeah somewhere you don't want to go yeah fair enough yeah not like over here where you get a handjob on a Saturday afternoon

37:28Lutz Pfannenstiel:bloody xbox in your cell yeah there's none of that there none of that there but they're going to have to face a lot more of it because it goes to trial and both Lutz and Mickey are sentenced to five months in the slammer. Yeah, it's grim times and needless to say, the prison itself is hellish. So on his first night, there's a tradition that the guards initiate you. It's a bit like being back at Wimbledon. Yeah, this would be a breeze. Yeah, a naked lap of the exercise yard. I'm actually not sure I'd want to do that either, but they've got a worse, worse, worse punishment in store for him because they chuck him in a cell.

38:04Lutz Pfannenstiel:It's just him and one bloke. So initially, because he's been told...

38:06Jason Manford:Did you ever bloke John Fasherneau though? That would be awful, wouldn't it? The woogaloo. I've all that to mask on.

38:14Lutz Pfannenstiel:I've been expecting you. I think John Fasherneau around that time did have a bit of a match fixing thing, didn't he? Yeah, the tabloids, one of the tabloids did him for match fixing. Oh, it was the fake shakes, wasn't it? The fake shakes. Fake shakes. So it was probably a complete stitch up. Yeah, so he gets put in the cell and he's been told, look, one of the worst things is you're going to be in the cell with fucking loads of people. It's really cramped. So he gets in there and there's only one other bloke and the bloke's sort of half asleep. He's like, great. But then the guard comes and says, oh, just so you know, this guy's a double murderer and we've sedated him because he's so crazy, but it will wear off.

38:46Lutz Pfannenstiel:So enjoy. So it's sort of like a ticking time bomb torture. The guards are finding it funny and he's like, right. So he's just sitting there like, wait for this bloke to wake up and eventually the bloke sort of stirs, spots him, starts screaming at him and then jumps on him and starts attacking him. But he's half sedated. So he's a bit sort of sloppy and Lutz is able to fight him off and throw him into the corner where the bloke sort of slumps looking at him. And he says he just spends the rest of the night just eyeballing each other. He doesn't sleep a wink. So it's pretty scary, but he's, you know, at least got away with it.

39:18Lutz Pfannenstiel:And the next day he's relieved to learn he's being moved into another cell with Mickey, who he's pretty pissed off with and dropping them in it.

39:24Jason Manford:Better the devil you know, though. Exactly. It's a friendly face. At least he's not going to slit his throat in the night. No, yeah.

39:30Lutz Pfannenstiel:But there are some people in there who might, because after Mickey comes in, 10 murderers follow. 10 murderers? Yeah, 10. 10. 12 days of Christmas. And a Patrick on a Patrick. 10 murderers murdering. Two match fixes fixing. Isn't Singapore supposed to be quite a safe place? Yeah, but they've got crime. That's because the prison's on. No chewing gum on the streets. They've got a lot of Chinese triad gangs, apparently. A lot of drug smugglers. Right. Because Singapore's a big port, doesn't it? So it has a lot of drug smuggling and stuff like that. So anyway, they've got plenty of murderers to push his way.

40:10Lutz Pfannenstiel:And they're put into the cell with the murderers. And pretty quickly, it's clear that they're going to be getting shoved around a lot. So they get given food once a day. Not very much. But they get their tray of food. And all the other cellmates just take their food. And it's just like, you're just being bullied. And obviously, you don't want to stand up to them because they're fucking terrifying. so this keeps happening until one day he and Mickey are on the exercise yard cowering from anyone else when this pretty terrifying bloke comes over to them and he is a former boxer so he's got a bit of sympathy their fellow sportsman he's been done for manslaughter and he basically takes them under his wing and this guy's quite respected in the prison because a lot of prisoners get lashes which is apparently fucking horrific and he's known for having not screamed and not passed out.

40:57Lutz Pfannenstiel:So he's got quite a lot of like respect in the prison. And he tells them, look, if you guys keep letting everyone take your food, they're going to, it's going to keep getting worse and worse and it's going to get really ugly. You've got to stand up to them.

41:08Jason Manford:I feel like I've heard this advice a lot. It's the cliche about prison, isn't it? Get in there, find the biggest guy in the yard, take him out and then everyone will leave you alone.

41:16Lutz Pfannenstiel:I can't see it working. What if I can't take him out? You can't take anyone out. In real term, yeah.

41:21Jason Manford:In real term.

41:21Lutz Pfannenstiel:Because I was thinking about this this morning when I was reading about this and just like, am I actually going to just fucking attack some mental bloke and then he's going to beat me up anyway. Do they respect you if you get beat into a pulp anyway? I think maybe the idea is you've started it. Maybe you pick on someone even more weak than yourself, which I think I'd have trouble finding for a person, to be honest. It's not like for parking offences. I know, because I've often thought, you know,

41:46Jason Manford:when you have that thought about prison, because I've got six children and six kids at home, and sometimes I've thought to myself, oh what if there's a crime I can do that just gets me like two weeks in prison just for a break do you know what I mean like free gym you know free meals a day telly hand job on a Saturday afternoon for one of the staff yeah you know and uh I've thought about it but like so obviously you have to find a crime that's you know not going to ruin your career so you can come out and people still think you're a hero like so two weeks sentence yeah and it's like lower so you've maybe you've defended somebody and and hurt them by accident something like that you know um but the actual prison bit I think I don't know I feel like because they often say with comics like oh like you know did you not get bullied at school because you you know you laughed yourself you know you made the bullies laugh and you're like I don't think you remember school there's no point you're getting battered going make them laugh two priests walk into a bar that never happened

42:45Lutz Pfannenstiel:it's not it's not a thing yeah and if it doesn't work at school it's not going to work in prison do they have a special bit for people who are just in there for for like two weeks for you got lower security haven't you

42:56Jason Manford:minimum security yes yeah you've got what yeah i had an uncle in uh who went into um one of a jail in preston for a like a fraud thing and uh minimum yeah minimal and like literally the door the gates open yeah you can go you're not you're not allowed but they just say that's open but if you go then the police will deal with you you know what's up testing and if you and you won't be coming back here either you've got strange ways so saying i'm off yeah so because

43:25Lutz Pfannenstiel:wayne lineker was in one oh no wayne liniker was in a proper prison but he was given day release for something and he he he used it to get his girlfriend to rent a limo and they went and shagged in the limo that was his day release i feel like i was the other thing i did notice

43:39Jason Manford:actually when i went to visit my uncle in prison is that he was he was sort of about 50 at that point and most people in there seemed to be like 20 so they did like they were calling him like granddad like you know and he sort of ended up this sort of elder stakes like a father figure yeah so i think i'd have to hope for that like at 45 that maybe i'd be getting to that point

43:57Lutz Pfannenstiel:and they'd respect me yeah i guess i guess beating up a an older guy is less you're not gonna get much cred for that not really in the prison really yeah do they care about that i don't get the impression in this singapore prison they would have cared i didn't care that he was a fucking goalkeeper and you think that would get you know sometimes we read about footballers going inside and they say like it was a bit easier because I had fans. Yeah, yeah. Either that or you've got a target on your back. Yeah. Are they a big Geelong fan or yeah. Or their rivals. Whoever, their rivals. Rated rivals.

44:30Lutz Pfannenstiel:Semowang probably. Semowang. Well yeah, anyway, luckily this one bloke takes them under his wing and he gives them some advice. He says, you've got to fucking hit them and kick them in the knee. It's the most painful place to be hit. Apparently if you're weak and feeble, a kick in the knee is the move, which I have noted. So next time, you know, a couple of days later, he's sitting down for his meal and a famed drug smuggler comes over, starts taking all his food, looks, stands up, smacks him twice in the face, kicks the bloke in the knee. And it works. He says he has to, has to do it a few times.

45:03Lutz Pfannenstiel:There's like a few occasions over the next week where he does it. And then after that, he is safe from the immediate threat of violence. Oh gosh. But it's still hellish in there. So he says, every night you could hear screams of prisoners being lashed. It's stiflingly hot and humid. Cockroaches are laying eggs in people's ears, which weirdly sounds like the worst bit. Yeah, there's not only that.

45:24Jason Manford:The cockroaches ruin that. Yeah. Of all the spaces you can do it.

45:29Lutz Pfannenstiel:The AI's gone too far there.

45:30Jason Manford:That's not right.

45:32Lutz Pfannenstiel:Horrible. He says every day felt like a fortnight, but fortunately, because he did keep his German citizenship, the embassy is lobbying on his behalf. Can you imagine? Because apparently Indonesia wouldn't have got very far.

45:43Jason Manford:but the Germans

45:44Lutz Pfannenstiel:have got a bit clout there

45:45Jason Manford:and so

45:46Lutz Pfannenstiel:after 101 days he gets the news you're getting out and he's released so he served three and a half months of a five month sentence what about Mickey is Mickey still Mickey actually gets out seven days earlier that's a bit kicking the teeth Mickey you're the one who got us in here in the first place maybe that's why he should have ratted out on Mickey doing something in the prison he brought a mobile phone in he checked his ass check his ass apparently Mickey says to him he gets out seven days earlier and he says look if I could do these next seven days with you I would do it of course you were better of course Mickey you're a man of your words see ya but he does get out he's lost 16 kilos in three months

46:26Jason Manford:bloody hell

46:27Lutz Pfannenstiel:they're just not giving me any food so the first thing he does is go straight what's that like three stone or something yeah it's about like two or three stone he goes straight to KFC eats eight chicken burgers and then he gets the fuck out of Singapore so he goes straight to the airport after that and gets on the Lufthansa flight you know it's him and a load of like German businessmen been in Singapore doing deals and as the plane gets off the tarmac he just yells I'm free! Apparently everyone's looking at him like who's this bloke? This gaunt bloke but he is free, he's out

47:01Jason Manford:he's arrested for causing a nuisance sorry we're going to have to land this plane

47:09Lutz Pfannenstiel:that would be great But the trouble's not over. No, because he's been banned now by the Asian Football Federation. He can't play anywhere in Asia. And they're getting onto FIFA to try and extend it to an international ban. Initially, FIFA refuse until Sepp Blatter gets involved. So it's 2002 and Sepp Blatter, he's up for re-election for FIFA president. And he needs every vote. And he knows that the Asian Federation, they're on about this guy, Lutz. and he thinks it's going to be a bit of a vote winner if he extends this ban. So he gives an interview where he says that's what he's going to do. And Lutz catches wind of this and obviously is furious and gets hold of Sepp Blatter's number and has an hour-long phone call with his secretary, which it turns out Sepp Blatter's actually listening in on speakerphone, basically telling his side of the story, explaining, you know, I didn't really do it.

48:06Lutz Pfannenstiel:It's all fucking Mickey's fault. Ban him. definitely ban Mickey Mickey's taking back handers left right centre and the next day FIFA clarify that there will be no ban for looks he can play outside of Asia which is a result for him as a human side who knew although to be fair he was going to ruin his career just to get Singapore to vote for him still that's quite impressive hustling as well just get his number yeah after that he does a little stint in Bradford because his girlfriend at the time has family there. But then he gets the call from Dunedin Technical in New Zealand. And this, he says, is his favourite club he ever plays for.

48:46Lutz Pfannenstiel:He plays for them three times, three stints. And it's a real, it's not like playing in the Premier League. You know, it's a family club. Everyone's got jobs most of the week. They all have like, you know, team barbecues or all eating New Zealand lamb, going bungee jumping together. He loves New Zealand. He just loves the culture. But, you know, there are wrong ones everywhere. and one day his flat gets burgled and about five grand's worth of stuff is taken it's a lot of stuff it's cash his games console uh you know a load of shirts and he's he's really fucked off about this obviously he calls the police they show up and they're just like look here's a crime number but we're not going to catch these guys uh and so he takes matters into his own hands and turns vigilante so he has an idea he's like that guy nick quite a lot of stuff that's pornable I'm going to go to the porn shop when it opens tomorrow morning and wait and see see if any of my stuff turns up so he goes the club president comes with him who he's basically mates with it's not a lot going on with Danny Uncle Dave it's just one of the clubs can't imagine Sheikh Mansour just waiting waiting in an alley with Kevin De Bruyne gonna need you to tool up mate there's a lot of vigilante justice in this episode actually anyway so they go to this porn shop and lo and behold at 9.01am in walks this massive bloke 6 foot 4 17 stone and he's wearing one of Lutz's favourite shirts no way Tommy Hilfiger number and he plonks down all the stuff on the counter and says what can I get for this and Lutz is like that's my DVD player that's all my stuff so he runs straight over to the bloke and of course smacks him in the face and kicks him in the knee it's tried and tested method yeah yeah it works in prison it works anywhere and the bloke is like shitting himself despite being massive he's like whoa whoa whoa whoa and looks is over him like you know basically he's got him pinned down and someone calls the police who rush in and the guy insists that he did not do the burglary he says that this drug addict owes him money and instead of giving him money the guy gave him all this stuff right and looks actually buys the excuse i mean he gets a load of the stuff back off the guy and he believes him so the guy walks free the police let him go Lutz says he actually bumps into him in the pub three months later and they have a good laugh about it which is quite nice no odd feelings but the police aren't interested to find out why this drug addict owes him £50 ,000 so apparently the drug addict is known to police so they're like oh yeah that guy I think he's called Brian Clark or something but yeah I mean drug addicts only owe you money for one reason normally yeah well they let the guy let the guy go but Lutz is still missing a couple of things $1500 in cash and his favourite goalkeeping jersey which is pretty distinctive because it says one Fannenshtiel on the back and so he says to his teammates if you see anyone around Dunedin wearing that shirt give me a shout and lo and behold a week later one of his teammates who works in the bank rings him and he's like a bloke has just walked in wearing the shirt which is pretty fucking stupid so Lutz gets in his car he says he drives two kilometers in 60 seconds races over and there he finds this guy who's not only wearing his shirt he's wearing his baseball cap and sunglasses as well kicks him in the knee you got it well he headbutts him first interestingly starts with the headbutt headbutts the nose and then he does kick him in the knee a few more punches and then he makes the guy take off his hat sunglasses and shirt and the guy's putting up no resistance yeah yeah so this guy's taking them off

52:21Jason Manford:it's a rookie mistake isn't it so if you're gonna wear something that distinctly yeah like we'll give it away I can't imagine the town they're in is one of those places. I mean, the local drug dealer is called Brian. And they all know him. Yeah, everyone knows Brian. And everyone knows the German goalkeeper.

52:38Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, my mate actually had it. He got burgled in Buenos Aires and they caught the guy and they were like, we're going to do an ID parade. And he got to the ID parade and they were like, well, he immediately goes, that's him. They go, how do you know? And he was like, well, he's wearing a Chelsea shirt with my name on the back. It said Carter.

52:54Jason Manford:And I went to school with three of the other guys.

52:59Lutz Pfannenstiel:anyway he having got his shirt hat and sunglasses off the guy he then goes a bit far old Lutz he says take the shorts off as well the guy's like right yep so he takes his shorts off and pretty soon Lutz has got this bloke completely naked apart from his shoes and socks and he's still beating him up it's in the middle of the street in the morning in Dunedin and you're the goalkeeper of the local club as well yeah he's very well known and soon a crowd has gathered of course who are like what the fuck and obviously people call the police who rock up and eventually break them apart. And Lutz's final act says to the guy, open your wallet and in there is his cash.

53:37Lutz Pfannenstiel:Or most of it. So he gets it all back. And yeah. A few rolls of crack.

53:42Jason Manford:Yeah.

53:43Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yoink. But yeah, walks free. Because I think he's probably committed a crime there himself. I feel like that's definitely a crime of verses, yeah. Anyway, they, yeah, I don't know what happens to all Brian Clark, but yeah. All's well that ends well. It is. and it turns out that Lutz is partial to the odd brazen theft himself. So one day, he visits this penguin reserve near where his club is and he's having a lovely... You can't stay away from the reserves, this guy. We've got a lot in common, you and me.

54:15Jason Manford:I see myself in you. You're in the reserves, I'm in the reserves.

54:20Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, he's having a lovely day with his kindred spirits and he's admiring these penguins and you know penguins they're cute they're very cuddly and Lutz decides I want one of them as a pet we've all thought it we've all thought it yeah but Lutz he's used to getting his own way and he just can't stop thinking about this penguin he can't sleep at night because he's just thinking about being how nice this would be if he was cuddled up to a fishy smelling little bird and he decides he is going to steal one of these penguins so he uh so he actually recalls it in his book he says quietly i put on a black hoodie and black jeans and grab my rucksack and a pair of goalkeeper gloves before setting off in my car so he does this under under cover of darkness drives back to the penguin reserve uh and he climbs in and he's been there all day and he knows that they sleep in these holes in the ground so he tiptoes over he's scouting out these holes sticks his hands into a couple of them but there's nothing and then the third one he says I felt something soft I reached in hauled the penguin out of his hole and put it inside my rucksack is that why the gloves encase it?

55:36Lutz Pfannenstiel:I mean yeah it's perfect he's got his goalkeeper gloves if you got caught with the gloves on it you'd feel stupid I think yeah but obviously this penguin is pretty confused about what's going on. Is that, that looks vanishing. What's that? And the penguin starts pecking him but he manages to squeeze it into this rucksack, throws it on the passenger seat of his car. But obviously then he's faced with another conundrum of what to do with this penguin and how to look after it. So he decides to, I don't know if he thinks that far ahead really. No, he's nearly not. So he decides to stop at this 24 hour petrol station he knows and buys 10 kilos of ice.

56:19Lutz Pfannenstiel:penguins like ice uh and takes it back fills his bath up with the ice and puts the penguin in there and just goes off to bed the following morning his housemate wakes up to go to work and goes into the bathroom to have a shower and just scream he just hears a scream from his room and there's a penguin in the bath and yeah apparently he was just like oh it's just our new pet just leave it and apparently the guy was just like oh okay and shut the door which I guess if you're living with Lutz Pranich then you're used to some unusual things apparently he feeds the penguin goldfish from a shop right fair enough they eat fish yeah I don't know how much nutrition is in it yeah is a goldfish a delicious snack probably not they want they want macrolos sardines or something yeah yeah it keeps it going though for long enough and Lutz invites around the club president, Mark, who's a good friend of him.

57:25Lutz Pfannenstiel:Mark's been to beat up burglars with him. He thinks that he's going to be au fait with this sort of thing. But when Mark sees the penguin at the bathtub, he loses his mind. He's like, Lutz, what the fuck are you doing? You need to take, get this penguin back now or you're going to be in the reserves too. And so that night, Lutz drives back and drops the penguin back off at the reserve.

57:50Jason Manford:To be fair, when that penguin got back, you're not going to go. You know the goalkeeper?

57:57Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, of course, mate. I ate these orange fish. Of course you did, mate. So what, that's sort of 24 hours? Yeah, I think it must have been, yeah, I don't think he's had it that long. Probably that long. But very late that week, Mark, the club director, comes around for dinner and serves up chicken and Mark just looks at it wide eyes. He's like, well, it is chicken, honestly. Poor bastard penguin. Got away with it. And then he goes back to Bradford, obviously. The season in New Zealand's over. You want to do the European season. So he goes to Bradford Park Avenue, non-league side, where he's got a few connections by this point.

58:42Lutz Pfannenstiel:And he's playing for them on Boxing Day. Biggest game in the calendar in many ways. and he's really pumped up for this game and he's in goal. The opposition striker comes through one and one with him and Lutz, you know, shapes to block him. Kicks him in the knee. Can't help himself. Can't help himself. Hold that bit. Actually, on this occasion, it's the knee that it kicks him. So he gets a knee straight to the chest. Which, yeah, karma, really. And he smacks into him and Lutz, he says, the last thing I remember was like intense agony. I stood up and then everything went black. He collapses. and the referee actually waves play on and they score.

59:20Lutz Pfannenstiel:Old school. Barely touched him. You don't even need a keeper. Yeah. And then at that point, the crowd goes silent. Everyone realizes it's like, fucking hell, he's really hurt. And the Bradford Park Avenue physio rushes on and the physio's got a bit of a reputation for just being like a magic sponge merchant. Doesn't really do much. And to be fair, it doesn't help matters because he stands over him, takes his pulse and then screams, he's fucking dead! Which is probably not, you know the cool head yeah particularly that is your job to make sure that he is not dead yeah let's at least give him a go well let's at least keep people calm not a physio physio I suppose

59:57Jason Manford:if it's life and death if somebody goes to a doctor and you go I'm a physio you go not you dentist vet

1:00:05Lutz Pfannenstiel:to be fair I mean his his pregnant girlfriend's in the crowd so it's oh gosh like terrifying and the quick thinking physio then realises first aid training mouth to mouth

1:00:15Jason Manford:so he gets down

1:00:16Lutz Pfannenstiel:and gives Lutz mouth to mouth and brings him back to life gets a pulse screams he's alive and then the pulse drops again and he's dead again and then he's dead he's dead

1:00:28Jason Manford:like Panto some sort of Mel Brooks oh no he's not

1:00:35Lutz Pfannenstiel:this happens three times he dies his pulse stops for like a decent amount of time I think sort of 30 seconds at a time and each time the CPR brings him back to life and eventually they get him going long enough to get him in an ambulance to hospital and he wakes up within an hour and apparently his main thought having woken up is how angry he is that he was substituted the game was abandoned I guess he doesn't get much first team action so the game was abandoned but he plays one week later wow I've got a feeling

1:01:03Jason Manford:the physio is not good at reading a pulse I think that might be we need to look into this if you're able to play football a week after you died three times I would suspect and maybe he didn't die three times a week earlier.

1:01:18Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, yeah.

1:01:21Jason Manford:That's my suspicion.

1:01:22Lutz Pfannenstiel:He's got one of those toy stethoscopes that you get for kids. He's playing Operation. To be fair, so he had organ failure, so his lungs collapsed and blood wasn't going into his heart, I think the doctors said. So the doctors were like, you were dead. Yeah, yeah, fair enough. I believe. Done about three times. It seems a lot. Anyway, after that, he sacks off Bradford because he gets offered a contract in Ukraine. This is what sort of turn of the millennium time. Ukraine in parts could be quite a scary place, especially where he's playing. So he joins this club where... And the sort of person he is.

1:01:59Lutz Pfannenstiel:Yeah, exactly. He's going to get himself into scraps. And he does. In his first week, he's given this like swanky car that he's driving around town. And suddenly he gets carjacked by a bloke with a gun. bloke just comes up to him just like out you get takes the car and he's just left stranded in the middle of nowhere it's pretty scary anyway the next day he comes back to the club and the car's there waiting for him and it turns out his club is owned by such an infamous gangster that when this carjacker realised who the car belonged to it's just like fuck

1:02:27Jason Manford:fully balloted yeah yeah exactly he's waxed it

1:02:30Lutz Pfannenstiel:brand new penguin in the boot full of ice isn't this there's one club that doesn't come up on his wikipedia so he says that he's played for 25 clubs on his Wikipedia there's only 24 because he's too afraid to put the name of this to tell anyone the name of this club that's how high up this gangster is wow but he says it's all he hates it it's just scary but there is one good thing because he has this translator who basically any situation he's in he can put her on the phone and she'll like translate from Ukrainian to English but eventually they go for a coffee and he realises she is a bona fide hottie and they get on really well.

1:03:10Lutz Pfannenstiel:And so, you know, does what Lutz Fannenshtiel always does, marries her within a few months. Of course. They marry so quickly that she can't pronounce her new surname, Fannenshtiel. She hasn't learned the German. You think as a translator, pronunciation is something you should be pretty... Yeah, but she's more free on it with. More English and Eastern European languages. Because he then takes her to Albania, where she translates for him. Albania, he says, is a complete shit show. And then he gets given sort of a new gig, really. He's appointed goalkeeper manager of a new club. It isn't, isn't it?

1:03:42Lutz Pfannenstiel:Has that ever happened before? It must have been. Must have. Did they do the photo? You know the famous Brian Robson photo where he's player manager at Forest or something? Middlesbrough. Middlesbrough. And he's got shorts on the bottom half and suit up at the top. What is it? Clubs. Should have done that. It's like suit, shorts and gloves. Yeah. Yeah, it's this brand new club in Armenia. So it's like a sort of a mini Abramovich vibe. They're just like starting a new club. It's very ramshackle. So he has to move the entire squad into his house with him and his new wife and her daughter. So just living with him.

1:04:13Lutz Pfannenstiel:He has to sack the club doctor after four days because the bloke treats a knee injury by cutting an onion in half and placing it on the knee. Okay. Yeah. So now he got the knee injury, but you can imagine. And it all goes to shit inevitably. They go bust. After that, he gets a job in MLS. So he plays for Vancouver Whitecaps. Wow. Who are legit. So, I mean, he's not playing for them. this is well they play against LA Galaxy in Beckham's first season so 2007

1:04:42Jason Manford:yeah because that pre LA Galaxy was just like yeah maybe no it'd be no one

1:04:47Lutz Pfannenstiel:famous yeah but Beckham's there right right I mean I say play against he's on the bench oh yeah of course

1:04:52Jason Manford:he's played with him we meet again and Beckham's like do we

1:04:55Lutz Pfannenstiel:who the fuck are you who are you you'll remember me from the crazy gang era yeah he my old foe he says on his I call it debut he's on the bench he doesn't play but he falls asleep on the bench so he's making a good impact but actually he loves Vancouver it's quite like a swanky lifestyle compared to what he was doing in Armenia and Ukraine before and his wife loves it but his agent keeps nagging on at him that he's now played in five continents he's got an agent yeah well this is a very busy one yeah he's sort of got like 20 blokes who broker transfers for him. Right. If you see what I mean. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:05:37Lutz Pfannenstiel:I guess agents, they get a cut every time he moves to a new club. 20 % of his annual salary is what he says in his book. And there's this one agent who's constantly saying, you could be the first footballer to play on six continents, which I don't think anyone else is trying to. What's the sixth? Well, Europe. Yeah. We did Africa, South Africa. We did Asia. We did Australasia. Oh, yeah. And North America. South America I was like Could have just said I was thinking

1:06:06Jason Manford:Who's playing What there's any teams In Antarctica Antarctica Geography wasn't My strong point Plenty of penguins Yeah exactly Finally I'm home Where everyone knows my name

1:06:21Lutz Pfannenstiel:So he does it He goes to Brazil And swaps his Lovely Vancouver apartment For a shack In a favela But it's a disaster He gets there And it's It's the old trial thing again Where he hasn't actually got a club, he's got a trial and he fails the trial. So he spends the next like six months just going around Brazil, trying to get a game. And where's the wife? I think she comes with him and I think she's pretty fucked up. She loved Vancouver. She loved Vancouver. They get promised like a really nice place in Brazil. You're going to have a place in central Rio. You're going to love it right on the beach.

1:06:54Lutz Pfannenstiel:And then they get there and it's literally a favela.

1:06:56Jason Manford:I can't tell if he's like, if he's a victim. Do you know what I mean? he's like naive yeah but is it like yeah he always wants to believe the best yes and then I sort of feel for him but he's also

1:07:09Lutz Pfannenstiel:quite selfish yeah you've got to be

1:07:11Jason Manford:in the rough and tough I mean I know you you know you guys have got parents like that but can you imagine saying to your wife I know you love it here but I'm thinking of Brazil I'm going to go Brazil I'd love it yeah should we just look at you and go off you go that's you done and he would and to be fair well he would to be fair that's the difference yeah yeah

1:07:32Lutz Pfannenstiel:yeah I mean I think if you want to play on six continents you've got to make sacrifices it's a weird weird life always on the road anyway he does finally get a club and he gets the game and it's it's big news he's in Guinness Book of Records right he's man of the match in a 2-0 defeat get the feeling that's not a proper merit award that man of the match but he does it and he plays for them for four more weeks and then fucks off and and that's pretty much the end of his playing career he does stints coaching. He coaches Namibia and Cuba's goalkeepers. He does the international thing. And then he becomes a bit of a star in Germany on TV because he becomes a pundit for the World Cup, 2010, 2014, because he's obviously got the perspective of the whole world.

1:08:17Jason Manford:Yeah, and he's obviously decent looking because he was a model for a bit, wasn't he? Yeah, and he's charismatic. Yeah, clearly. Three wives and...

1:08:26Lutz Pfannenstiel:And the rest. Stint in prison. He's an interesting character. So he becomes was a genuine star and after that is how he then ends up with the aberdeen job because he scouts for hoffenheim for a bit okay does very well and of course now has has come to the bright lights yeah of aberdeen and he says he's still planning to have a match in antarctica oh so he is thinking about genuinely he's been trying he's been trying to organize like a soccer raid style because he's got this charity called global united and he did a sort of soccer aidy things he had maradona in it but he's big dreamers for them to play in Antarctica right if you get you on that one yeah I see if you're playing New Zealand

1:09:03Jason Manford:I'm probably more likely to get a run out than soccer heads I think Yaya Torre's getting a game in that one yeah

1:09:11Lutz Pfannenstiel:in Antarctica but yeah that's the story what a story brilliant it's great it's such a it's just fun I feel like he's one of these people who just he'll just say yes to everything which ends you up in some pretty fun cake books including match fixing yeah

1:09:27Jason Manford:yeah I'd definitely watch a film of his life I mean honestly

1:09:32Lutz Pfannenstiel:there's loads we had to cut as well just from his book it's worth reading it's called The Unstoppable Keeper if anyone wants to read it because he tells it well yeah he's up for a laugh but yeah I don't know what Aberdeen have in store for them

1:09:43Jason Manford:maybe there'll be Waterstones in Aberdeen little book signings yeah I'm sure there will

1:09:48Lutz Pfannenstiel:I think the fans are quite into it in Aberdeen because it's just fun characters it's quite Scottish football to have a sort of yeah nutter yeah and he is an otter yeah I mean that's that's the story Jason thanks a lot brilliant

1:10:02Jason Manford:no what a treat it was great I sort of kept forgetting that I had to join in I thought I was just listening to the podcast it was great it was great really good no thanks for having me on come on again

1:10:10Lutz Pfannenstiel:for someone you've heard of yeah

1:10:12Jason Manford:no actually sort of in a way I sort of prefer because I think we were talking about Keegan weren't we and stuff like that but in a way it's great just hearing somebody hopefully the guest for Keegan doesn't hear that oh yeah sorry turn down no i was that was a fun one no thanks very much i'm i'm a big fan of the show so it's uh

1:10:33Lutz Pfannenstiel:it was a treat to do yeah thanks a lot thanks so much for coming on yeah and thanks for watching and listening please share it with your friends as always especially if they're into insane goalkeepers and see you next time

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1:11:13Lutz Pfannenstiel:Hi, this is Alex Kantrowicz. I'm the host of Big Technology Podcast, a longtime reporter and an on-air contributor to CNBC. And if you're like me, you're trying to figure out how artificial intelligence is changing the business world and our lives. So each week on Big Technology, I bring on key actors from companies building AI tech and outsiders trying to influence it. Asking where this is all going. They come from places like NVIDIA, Microsoft, Amazon, and plenty more. So if you want to be smart with your wallet, your career choices, in meetings with your colleagues, and at dinner parties, listen to Big Technology Podcast wherever you get your podcasts.