Session 106: Hailey Bieber

28:43He says basketball all the time. I went to get him up from his nap today, and he was like, basketball? Like, he's just, it's insane. So funny. He also just started saying please. I'm like, say please. He knew how to sign please for a really long time. So if I would say, hey, say please, he would go like this. Uh-huh. As please. and now he goes peace oh it's so cute it's so fun what's it like being a mom it is so fun i've i always knew i wanted kids i always wanted to be a mom and then when it happens it's just like you never know what to expect and you don't know what it's going to be like and it honestly is it's so much fun what was like so crazy that like you were like i no one warned me about this and i wasn't expecting it it's a whole bunch of you just don't know what's going to happen until you get there.

29:32I think something that I feel did surprise me though, was that I feel like I'm a lot more relaxed as a mom than I thought I would be. I think, especially as a first time mom. Right. Cause do you think you were going to be like stressed about like the health and the safety? Yeah. I think I thought I was going to be a lot more. And I did like when I first had him, I definitely had more anxiety about, you know, when they're so small, it's a lot scarier. Right. But even so I, I was a lot more relaxed about everything than I, than I thought because I realized that you just figure it out as you go. Like every single day, you're just figuring out how to be a parent as you go and you're just learning as they're learning.

30:09And I think it's just the coolest thing to watch a little person become their own little person. Like I'm watching him get his personality. I'm seeing what he's into. He likes basketball. He likes this thing. You know, it's like, it's so fun. Does he ever listen to Justin's music? Yeah, he does. He's been saying, baby, oh, baby, oh, baby, oh. And I'm like, literally in the last two days, that is so crazy. Is he walking? He's walking, right? He's running. Shut up. Yeah. He's running. He's kicking a soccer ball. He's throwing the soccer ball. Oh, so he's going to be a sporty kid. So far, yeah. Like, he's into all of it.

30:49Oh, my God. I love babies. Yeah, he's so cute. I have to show you. I don't think I've ever seen a photo of him. Really? I just shaved his head. Well, I didn't shave it, but he got a haircut. Yeah, he's so blonde. To look like Dada. He honestly looks identical to him. Oh, my God. That is just it. Louise, you have to see. Come here. I'm going to freak the fuck out. No, I'm going to be sick. I'm going to be sick. He looks exactly like the two of us. Oh, my God, I'm going to be sick. I know. Let me see that again. Isn't he so cute? oh my god isn't that crazy oh my god oh my god he's adorable he's like the perfect mix of you guys i know it's kind of trippy who are you listening to right now i'm listening to i really love the new kid laroi album swag of course consistently and it's hard to always go back to it because i just think it's such a great album it's such a good listen to me top to bottom obviously maybe i'm a little biased but like i think the sign of a great album is like when you've given it time and then you go back to listening to it and I just constantly keep going back to it um what else am I listening to let's check are you Spotify or Apple Music I'm Apple Music really yeah I'm not a Spotify love Spotify love you guys but I'm not um a user um I love Tim's new album really into that love Olivia Dean's new album like running that into the ground I also really like the Tame Impala album, the new one.

32:22Oh, I've only heard a few songs from it, but I heard it's good. Favorite, favorite, like, of all time. I love Tame Impala there. Kevin Parker. Is it just one guy? Yeah. Okay. Totally. Totally. Totally, totally, totally. Have you seen him live? Yeah, I have. Did you see the latest show? You know what was really sad? I was supposed to go, and then the person I was supposed to go with was like, hey I'm actually going to like one of the shows earlier in the week but I'll go with you again and then and then you don't want to be that girl that's like yeah come with me again after you just went 48 hours ago no it's okay like I'll find somebody else to go with me and then I never found anybody to go with me so I didn't get to go and it was their last show of the U.S.

33:02tour and so I almost went by myself because I'm such a massive fan I can stand there by myself with a glass of wine and sing every song word for word but I was like I don't know if I love going to the forum by myself and like being there alone and it all worked out I don't think I was meant to be there but you'll you'll see them eventually I did see Tame Impala a few times before I saw them at Panorama Festival in New York City in Panorama Festival I was just like a sleeper cell activate it like oh my god i remember that festival i saw frank ocean there yes when he performed and chance the rapper did panorama yeah it was it was a time i think that was 2016 or 17 it was yeah 2017 i think and i saw tame and it was just amazing and then i saw them at the hollywood bowl which was amazing what's your favorite venue to see a show you know honestly i do love the bowl in LA because it just feels more intimate and it's outside and you can like bring your own wine and food and it's like it just is more of like a thing I like the forum because it's so easy I love the forum so in love the forum love the game room love the snacks yes it's amazing the last show I think I went to to there was Tate which was insane it never gets old never gets old I'm just like god damn it when I'm watching her I'm like I should be able to bend like that I know I want to like move my, it's like, if you're a really good dancer, like she is, like you're so magnetic and you like can't take your eyes off of you.

34:36She's amazing. I agree with that. A great dancer and she's just jumping into the splits. I'm like, good for you. I know. And it's just like, how does, how is that so easy? She's so hot. So hot. It's just so great. Well, what's your favorite Tame Impala song? My favorite Tame Impala song is, I think Yes, I'm Changing is so good. I like, have you ever heard, well of course you've heard, Eventually. Eventually is amazing. Imagine seeing that live and like shouting it at the top of your lungs. I know. It's a spiritual experience. Did you see them when they were at Gov Ball? I didn't get to go, no.

35:11Okay, have you ever been to Gov Ball? I haven't. Well, it's, no, I don't think so. It's like, it was like very like kiddie playground back in the day. Like I got my fake ID taken there. Oh my God. I know. Did you ever have a fake ID? No. What were the spots back in New York? Like back in the 2014, 2017? Up and Down. Dad. Do you know Up and Down? I know Up and Down. Up and Down. And then they made like a downstairs of Up and Down, which was called Never Ever. And then One Oak, obviously. Of course. Marquee. Marquee. Yeah. Naming some spots. God, it'll never be that again. Then there was like the upstairs of Cipriani, which is still a thing.

35:56I got grabbed out of there by my neck once. And the one in New York? Here. Literally less than a year ago. Why? Because, talk about fainting, my friend fainted in the bathroom. And I went to go check up on her. And it was the girl's bathroom. So I like went in. And I was like, are you okay? Da, da, da. And so they ripped me out and like by here and like just threw me out on the street. and I never experienced anything like that before ever in my life. That's really crazy and mean. I know. People start naming places in New York to me now and I'm like, I've never heard of that. I know. And then I start to feel old.

36:34You're not even 30 yet though. I know. And 30s are the new 20s. I'm so young. And you still have fun I feel like. I definitely do. Yeah. I definitely do. I just think that now in my life, I find it more fun. Like the nights where I have a lot of fun, I think it's because they happen less often when I was like 19 20 it was every other night there was a night to do something you know when I would come spend time in LA yeah in 2016 it was like Tuesday was this thing Thursday was this thing Friday was this thing Saturday was this thing it was the same in New York it was like Tuesday Thursday Wednesday Friday it was there was always something to go to and always something to do and so I feel like I really got to have that right for enough time that's why I didn't feel like it was crazy to settle down at 21 because I was like I just did that for the last like four years I'm okay to like you know move on to this new like chapter in my life um and I always knew I was gonna get married young it was always something that I wanted but I think now when I have really fun nights or like a fun weekend at Coachella or whatever it is it's because they happen so much less than they used to that I really savor it and I soak up and I'm a lot more present because I don't know when it'll be like that again.

37:51Right. And I like that they're more few and far between. Yeah. Now. I mean, I, in a similar way, like that's kind of how I was in college. Like we'd go out like Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. And then, then when that ends and you go post-grad and you do it like once every two weeks, it's like, so it is like in a sense more fun because it happens less and you're like, you get everyone together and like. even I feel like recently we had a game night at my best friend's house and we were all drinking wine we ordered a bunch of pizzas and we had the most fun funny night and I'm like this is also really fun it doesn't have to be going out and going and doing a whole big thing and also just putting sweats on and getting in bed and watching homeland like I was saying last night I was on FaceTime with someone and I was I came home and I was like putting my sweats on and And I was like, is there any better feeling in the world than coming home from a long day and getting your sweatpants on?

38:48Or also fresh sheets and sweatpants. Fresh sheets and sweatpants. Like a shower, sweatpants, bed, Postmates, all of it. I'm just like, I love it. Love it. I love that life. What's your next show that you're going to watch? I have to figure that out. I've been watching Tell Me Lies, which you have not caught up on. I'm not caught up. And I'm upset about it. Is it that good this season? I think it's great I just started I heard Stephen's like Unhinged this season Unhinged Unwell I want to experience A Stephen We all know one I don't know If I know a Stephen You don't know Any straight male That acts like Stephen Come on I don't think I have Well the thing is I don't have guy friends Okay Fair And it's such a red flag You don't know a guy Who a friend of yours Is dated That gives that energy I do There you go I do So you do know one I do know one.

39:43We all know one is the point. Back to the guy that I was talking about. Do you think, okay, do you think when you, I know you said you're like the ick isn't a thing. I gotta get settled in for this now. You're like the ick isn't a thing. You're like once you get married the ick isn't a thing. But like. No, that's not what I said. Because you were saying something to me along the lines of like will I ever get over the ick. I went on one day. And I was like wait. everyone has things that are like quirks about themselves that we might find to be an ick don't you remember that trend that was on tiktok when it was like girls were like posting icks of their boyfriend that they discovered and it would be like the their boyfriend like swimming and then they'd go down to their feet and it'd be like like everybody gives icks like i don't care who you are i don't care what relationship you're in And like, right.

40:34I live with myself and I ick myself out. I ick myself out always. Exactly. And you're stuck with you. So. Unfortunately, literally, unfortunately. Sorry, this cough is good. No, everyone's sick. It's like, this has been a rough. Forgot to take my inhaler today. Asthma? No, for my cough. But do you have asthma? I have exercise induced asthma. Maybe that's not a real thing, but. Exercise induced asthma? yeah like exercise hold on hold on we gotta look it up like it's situational yes okay let's ask hold on is exercise yes exercise induced asthma is a real thing though doctors now more accurately call it exercise induced bronchial constriction oh okay so i was told i had that as a teenager and I always had an inhaler for that specifically.

41:33And now you have it for this cough. Yeah, but you know, some people, even if they don't have asthma and they get bronchitis, will get an inhaler because it's a spasm of the bronchial. So the inhaler will help control the bronchial spasm. Big words. I'm obsessed with medicine. Are you really? Yeah. I would have like loved to be a doctor. What about medicine? like I just am so fascinated with the body and medicine and doctors and I just I love it. Are you a hypochondriac? No I'm not I'm not a hypochondriac but I am somebody who's really uber and hyper aware of their body and then a couple years ago I had like a crazy medical situation I had like a mini stroke and then I found that I had this like heart defect that I was born with so I had to get surgery for it which sounds really crazy but they went through my groin and it was like an I was only in and out of the hospital the same day I don't I had heart surgery and I was like huh like you cut your chest open it wasn't that serious um and I think that situation made me a little bit extra hyper aware of my body and a little bit more nervous about things and like staying on top of them but I've just always been really focused and fascinated on health and it was also kind of what led me to want to do road my obsession with skincare also comes from my obsession with like medicine how long did this idea marinate before it became a real thing before I started really diving into developing it which was in 2020 I thought about doing it probably for four years five years prior like honestly ever since I started modeling I always knew I wanted to do something else and I knew that I loved skincare and was always very obsessive with skincare and taking care of my skin.

43:24So I knew I was going to go in that direction with it. I just never really thought about where I would start and the timing and the when and the how. But during the pandemic, I felt like there was time to finally sit down and think about it. And we didn't know when the world was going to open back up and get back to life. So I dove in in 2020. It's really and truly. some I think it was the first I told you it's like the first skincare I've ever used thank you it's amazing thank you it's like it eats you know it is thank you I mean listen I wouldn't use anything that I don't think exactly eats in your own words yes um you know I made the line to be something that I was going to use myself and it's so funny when I see people sometimes online be like she doesn't use her own stuff and I'm like I quite literally use every single one of my own products of course I use other things too I've always talked about that I've always said that I do skincare treatments I love micro needling I you know I do other things to maintain my skin and and keep it healthy and keep myself healthy I also think skin is an internal thing as well what you put into your body what you take I'm a huge vitamin taker like I take vitamins every single day every single night really yeah like which vitamins specifically like I just hold on tell me everything like I'll take something for my immunity I take magnesium I take something called like for my cortisol to keep like calm for my mood very calm thank you I appreciate that um just things that I feel like help keep everything in order like I'll take debloat vitamins I'll take you know drink teas little elixirs I take collagen jellies like I need to get on this i have been doing this since i was a teenager really because i grew up in a household where my mom she's very um homeopathic so is my dad and really into vitamins and so like my whole life she had me taking like fish oils and me too what yes every morning my dad would pour me a shot of fish oil with a little orange juice because i couldn't take the whole thing every time my mom tried to get me to take it like raw on the spoon I would vomit yeah it's disgusting you have to give me pills like this is impossible I used to bite the pills open sometimes she actually used to give me a little chew there was like kids chewable DHA that like it was supposed to like mask the taste it never did it it was disgusting but yeah I feel like growing up in a household like that it like it set me up for the rest of my life to be so like I'm so crazy about taking my vitamins.

46:02I travel everywhere with a little vitamin pill case. Do you travel a bunch? Not as much as I used to. Definitely not as much as I used to, which is really actually nice because I used to be somebody who was such a little nomad and loved that. And I loved moving around and bopping from city to city and seeing new places and travel. And now that I have a family, I'm so much more settled and happy to just be. I love being home. Right. And have you taken Jack on a vacation yet? Yeah. We've traveled with him a bit. Yeah. Where'd you take him? He's been a couple different places. We just took him to Japan.

46:36I'm going there next week. We have to have a discussion. I have lists. I have everything. Japan's my favorite place. I didn't know that. And all my friends said, you message Haley every day. Go fucking ask her about Japan. Yeah. I have, I have a lot of good recommendations for you. I'm going to Tokyo. Do you eat everything? Everything. Okay, great. Everything. Great. The food there is like amazing, right? It will be the most insane food experience of your life. What's your favorite restaurant in Japan? Ooh, that's so hard. One of your favorites. One of my favorites is a restaurant called Shima Steak.

47:08Okay. Just the most insane steak ever and the most insane steak sandwich. Incredible. Tokyo? Tokyo. Okay, I'm going to Tokyo. I'm going to Kyoto. And then we're going to Niseko. I've never been to Niseko. I would love to, but I've been to Kyoto and it's amazing. Apparently, like, I'm not going to want to leave Kyoto. You can walk into a 7-Eleven in Japan and eat, like, the best egg salad sandwich of your life. And the best, like, fried chicken. Like, it's... I hate egg salad. Oh, okay. Sorry. Something else. Something else. But, like, they're just... Everything is such good quality and so good.

47:45I'm going to try the egg salad. And every little thing is... Yeah. No. Don't try the egg salad if you don't like it. No. There's better things. Because you're, like, everyone's fucking talking about the egg salad sandwich at 7-Eleven in Japan. Everyone talks about it. There's better things. You don't need to try it. It's not a must. Okay. I promise. But I do need all your racks. And also, I would like your shopping racks. I have all of it. I'm going to send you a list. Okay. The vintage is amazing. Yes. Yeah. Apparently, there's good watches. You can literally walk into any vintage store and find great stuff.

48:14I'm so excited. And you guys just went to Tokyo and Kyoto or just Tokyo? We just went only to Tokyo this last trip that we were on. Justin's brand Skylark did a cool pop-up out there that was really amazing so we went all together and Jack loved it I got to take him out there a bit and he was running around and having a good time and it was great I loved it I was a little bit nervous to travel with him to such a far place with such crazy jet lag but he was great well because it's exactly I feel like it's like a day ahead so that I just honestly kept him on LA time right so he kind of like slept in the day and was up at night which was fine because I also like we were staying on that same time kind of so it worked out fine do you want to have like a big family I definitely want I'm taking it one kid at a time yeah I definitely do want one more um I'm not like in a rush but definitely want one more maybe I'll have four more maybe I'll have three I don't know I really don't know I'm just taking it one day like have you always had this like day-by-day mindset or does it come with age I'm actually such a future thinker and such a planner right I'm somebody who really enjoys planning and it makes me feel good to like I know where I'm gonna be in like a month from now you know it's like I know my schedule I love being scheduled and regimented and vitamins vitamins Demons and planning and, you know.

49:43Right. I'm very much that type of person. Are you the type of person that, like, journals a lot? I'm the type of person where sometimes randomly if I am awoken with thoughts, I'll start writing things down to, like, get them out of my brain and write them down. I'm somebody who does better with talking about things than writing them down. Right. I don't know why journaling feels like a chore to me. It feels, like, tedious. It doesn't feel – I want to do things that feel relieving. Right. and it feels like a chore for me maybe that's like my own battle I got across but I just no but it also like hurts your hand like also like journaling you have to be so intentional with it like I started the other week and like I was like I don't feel good because I'm writing horrible things about myself you know what I mean because I'm just writing whatever's in my head that's good is that when even if that's what you're doing not that you should ever be writing horrible things about yourself but getting them I think the whole point is getting them out of your brain right takes them out of your brain so like getting it out and getting it onto paper I think helps release the thoughts right when you were like creating road like where did you keep all your ideas like were you like where did you like keep them on like a your computer or like like how where did you like organize all your ideas I had I was writing things down in a notebook just all my kind of like word vomity ideas and I was writing down what I wanted the products to be and the ingredient stories and you know things I wanted to look into for the formulas and stuff and then I was making little decks on my iPad and on my computer and putting together mood boards and putting photos together and writing down the name and making mock-ups of a logo and when I went to the agency that we worked with for making the logo in the end and like the branding was like I had come to them already with like a brand deck and like had set all this stuff up my nerdy brand deck.

51:43Yeah kind of. So is she she just recently got one. Yeah I use my iPad to watch all my shows when I travel and then I use my computer to I love to FaceTime for my computer. Same. And I love to to make decks and like mood boards on my computer. Was it always Rode? Like, was that always the name? Like, did it just always the name? Right. And from the beginning, I always said to that I wanted it to feel like it could also be like a tech company. And that's kind of where the phone case came in. Did you where did how did the phone case happen? We were sitting in the office one day and I had the sticky thing on the back of my phone and I was sticking the lip treatment on the back of the sticky case and I was looking at it and sitting there with my team and I was like guys first of all this has to obviously exist right like there's no way this isn't on Amazon right now um so I was sticking the thing on the back of the phone I asked somebody to look it up to see if it existed and it didn't so I said let's do this let's see if we can make it happen and my team is the very best of the best and they were able to find like an amazing person a production person to make the cases.

52:55And do you remember, were there like multiple different mock-ups and like. There were multiple different, I mean, I said to them from the beginning, it should be a thing where there's like a slot and a holder for it. And we looked at if it was just a holder, if it was a case, we looked at, we did look at a lot of different versions of it, but it was something that I just did not anticipate going off the way that it did. It took off. And I think it was because the way it also shocked me that it didn't exist is it was, I think everybody's reaction was kind of the same as mine. Like, oh, duh. How did nobody ever think about this before?

53:31Right. And I've had so much fun with it now. Like the snap on one is so fun. And there's ways to just kind of keep giving it new lives. And it's been so fun. Do you, are you guys doing pimple patches? Yeah, we are doing pimple patches. Did they launch yet? No, they come out soon. In the spring. Okay. I'm so excited. Around a certain time where another certain fun thing is happening. Shut up. Right? Right. Right. You know? What else are you excited about in the coming year? Well, honestly, I am really excited about the pimple patches because it took us, they were supposed to have launched already and it took us so long to get them right.

54:10And it was so interesting because so many great pimple patches do already exist. And I thought it was going to be one of our more simple things to create. and it ended up taking the longest of almost anything that we've ever created. Why did it take so long? I think because I'm really, really psycho perfectionist and I want them to really do a certain thing. I don't ever want to create something if I think it's not the best of that version. If it's not the best version of that thing that I think is out there on the market. And in my humble opinion, I do think they're the best pimple patches I've ever used and I wanted that to be the case before he put them out into the world.

54:51And then it was like getting the shapes fine and the colors right. And it was just so much more of a process than I thought it was going to be. They're not just like little stickers that you stick on your face. They have a real function behind them that they do. But the timing is going to end up being perfect. I'm glad that they're coming when they're coming. When another fun thing is happening. When another fun thing is happening. What was your like most like, oh my God, like this, like it made you like you made you like look around and be like this brand is successful aside from selling it when people started coming up to me like out in the world and showing me the products in their bag or like when people when I started to really see just people out on the street like they wouldn't even see me but I'd see them with the phone case I was like wow that's crazy like I'd walk by people would be I'd be driving in my car and I'd see someone like on the street holding the phone case to me that was the moment that I was like wow that is so cool to see people have this just in their everyday life like that oh congratulations thank you that's awesome so fun yeah I love it I'm so passionate about it time too I know it's great I think it feels not as short for me because I started working on it in 2020 um but obviously to go from a launch to an acquisition in three years of course is very fast yeah but yeah I mean for me it was like fully a five-year journey which is also still fast yes either way regardless but it's been an amazing ride I love it and I feel so much even now I have a whole new breath of life with it post the acquisition I'm just I feel even more motivated more passionate so many more things I want to do and now that we have Elf as a partner I also feel I have more access to do that which is exciting would you ever do like kids like skincare and stuff i've thought about it i definitely have because i stay super on top of my son's skincare like every single night slathered head to toe in moisturizer face cream like everything i mean obviously like kids face cream is just you know very gentle simple things and i like to keep his skincare really gentle and simple um but I I would think about it yeah I'm definitely not opposed to it it's it's cool my favorite thing about road is like I feel like it sounds like an ad but it's not it's like I feel like it's so like unisex and like everyone uses it and that was my goal and that was my intention with it that's why the colors other than like the blushes and stuff because that obviously you know and anyone can use the blush the blushes but the color story with the skincare is very, you know, it's eggshell and sporty gray.

57:33And from the beginning, I kept saying, I want this to be a thing where it's very sporty feeling and it feels like it's something that you can throw in your bag and take to the gym or travel with easily, but also still really looks aesthetically pleasing in your bathroom and doesn't feel like anything else that's out there. Right. And so, yeah, that was my goal. I really wanted it to feel unisex. Well, that's amazing. Thank you. Well, Haley, what are you a therapist about today? You know what's really annoying about these questions? Not that it's an annoying question. Let me know. Every time someone asks me something like this, like, what's your biggest pet peeve?

58:09And I'm like, hmm, I have so many. I can't remember. And then the pet peeve will happen. And I'm like, why didn't I just fucking say that? I forget. No, always. What my answer is. And then I'll get in the car later and be like, oh, it's this thing. It's like blanking on a task. You know what I'm a therapist about today is this cough that I've had for like eight days. right I've had this cough for such a long time did you you know the the feeling of when it's like when you're like oh I wish I was more grateful of when I wasn't coughing yes that's how I feel I'm like I will never take it for granted again I know and then I will take it for granted I'm therapist about um my new bladder OCD like you have to pee a lot all the time don't they say that's an anxiety thing as well though oh do they yeah oh well I have to pee literally every five seconds.

58:56Oh, that's crazy. I know. Like I have to pee. I can't go. I pee every 10 minutes in bed. All the time? Yes. And so I have to sedate myself at night. So I just fall asleep without thinking about falling asleep. Because if I think about falling asleep, like I will have to pee. So what do you take to sedate yourself? Let me sleep. Let me sleep is great. No, let me sleep rocks my world. Not only are we on Netflix this season, but we have a very, very exciting new sponsor, Poppy. You guys know how much I love Poppy. I mean, seriously, if you look at some of my earlier videos, I'm singing about Poppy.

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1:02:35Thank you again, C-Geek, for sponsoring today's episode. Who do you watch on TikTok? I always think about that. What she watches on TikTok? Just like, what's coming up on your free page? So much shit. I don't go to anyone's page specifically to like watch a consistent person over and over again. but there are people that have popped up on my for you page that like pop up from time to time that I think are really funny right but sorry um but tiktok's tricky for me you know you're good at it I feel like I'm not shut up I feel like you know what it is I want to be that person who can set my camera up and just talk to it as if I'm talking to you at dinner.

1:03:25But I get really nervous because people get really nitpicky and like pick everything apart. And I just don't like dealing with that. When I see girls just chatting as if they're talking to a best friend, I find that so cute. And I just don't feel good at that because I start to feel a little bit like I can't fully be myself when I try to do that. And I just think the only way to do it right is to just like fully be yourself and just talk and have a good time and be fun when did you start getting like nervous about like people like nitpicking things you do um when they started nitpicking everything that i do right totally totally you know what i mean i feel like it got extremely bad when i got married and then everybody just every little thing i would say or do or every little movement I would make oh did you see when she like twitched her eye like that I'm like okay guys I'm just gonna keep to myself then which is kind of sad because I feel like I used to have a different relationship with social media and I felt a lot more free to be myself and you know now I think I definitely keep to myself more because of how intense it's gotten for me but I share what I want to share and I don't share what I don't want to share.

1:04:42But I think you are good at TikTok in the sense that you do do things that like - I make my cute little videos. I make my cute little videos. Face mask with the sushi. Yeah. Did you think like, wow, this is a skill? No, I was just being funny because I had posted another video. I didn't know it was a thing. I had posted another video eating sushi with a face mask and a bunch of the comments were like, damn, that's impressive. I look insane when I'm trying to eat with a face mask on. And I was like, oh, I didn't know this was like a conversation. And I was already, I was starting to develop this sheet mask with road.

1:05:17And I was like, don't worry, girls. Like I'm going to make you a face because a lot of the mouth holes on the face mask, they're so like small. Right. And so I was joking and I was like, I'm going to make one that's like easy to eat in, which actually was part of the conversation of the face mask that we were developing. I'm like, I want the mouth hole to like actually feel comfortable because who doesn't love sitting in a mask and eating food and just like being in your PJs at home and but yeah I mean I do love TikTok as like a point of connection with people I do like making my little videos and my little get ready with me things but people are really funny on TikTok like some things that I come across have me cracking up I love it I feel like TikTok sometimes in a weird way like gets me outside the house like I'm on like in a weird way because I'm like oh my god these people are having so much fun I want to have fun like these people are having fun yeah yeah you know what I mean 100 % I find so many I'm such a big foodie I just I love food and I love to discover a new yummy thing and one of my best friends is the same exact way and so we just our whole thing is just sending back and forth food foodie things on tiktok like random places in LA we've never heard of and never been to and like that's also one of my favorite things about TikTok is I've discovered great food I actually ordered sushi from a spot last night that I saw on TikTok and it was so what place it's called boss sushi never heard of it exactly that's what I'm saying and I ordered it last night and it was on I'm like I'm gonna go here well now I'm giving it away but is it where is it I think it's on La Cienega oh I don't know the street names oh I don't drive Do you know like where Matsuhisa is?

1:07:03Yes Okay so that's La Cienega Oh Shut up Yeah I swear What's your favorite restaurant in Los Angeles? What kind of food? Anything Jake get more specific Okay anything Not a steakhouse It can't be a steakhouse Okay I don't really go to a steakhouse out here anyway I hate steakhouses You can't just say you hate steakhouses period Have you ever been to Fort Charles in New York? No I've heard it's amazing Okay, well, that's technically a steakhouse. Okay, right, okay. So no, okay, favorite Italian restaurant? I have to say Giorgio Baldi. I know, I agree. I love it. I love it so much. It's just tried and true, and like I've never had a bad meal there ever.

1:07:46Have you ever been to Toscana? Mm-mm. Okay. But I drive by it a lot. Amazing. And I always wonder about it. It's really good. Okay, that's good to know. That's sushi. An omakase that I know is always going to hit really well sushi park you knew i was gonna say that hello duh and then i think sushi fumi is amazing amazing like really really love because i love going to a place it's like i want a great miso soup i want great rolls i want you know cucumber salad i want all the things and they have all the yummy things do you like thai food love have you been to anajac of course that's also one of my favorites it is one of the best restaurants i think of all like of all time of all time yeah have you had Do you eat like red meat?

1:08:30I eat everything. Chinese sausage fried rice. I just had that for the first time. Holy shit. My friend ordered it and I had never had it before. And I was like, why is this the best thing? It tastes like buttery. It's sweet. It's so good. It's so fucking good. It's so good. It's crazy. And then obviously the noodles, the Patsy U is amazing. Fuck, I think I'm going to get that for dinner tonight. How good? So good. Yeah. There's this place called Starbird. Have you ever had Starbird? Best fried chicken in Los Angeles. Oh, okay. I did it for like, I did like a Hot Ones thing and they like did the, they had it from there and they, and I was like, let me try it without the sauce.

1:09:09Cause like they. Can you tell me something about Hot Ones? Yes. Is it like that bad? Like the sauces are really that crazy? I've never done. Expose them. No, I've never done like the full, the full to do. I've never done like the, like the, the, the Sean's Hot Ones. I've done like what have I done but you did the last dab like you did the the spiciest sauce he did three it's like the one where you're not famous enough like that's what I did but you had the sauces not all of them no it's not that bad do you like spicy food though love more than anything yeah me too more than anything in the world love love Thai food's my favorite food in the world Thai food and Japanese food okay Japanese food isn't like super spicy no it's not It can be, but it's not like, yeah, it's not that crazy.

1:09:55What's your favorite like chain restaurant? You're like, okay, I can go here like across America and be like, this is my favorite. Across America? Okay, let me give you one in LA that I think forever is really delicious. It's not a place that I think is like a go and sit, but Bossa Nova. Shut up. It is so good to me. I see it on Postmates every night and I always scroll. I always kind of like look at the menu. let me say one thing about bossa nova i love bossa nova as i just stated my mom is from brazil so like i am very picky about brazilian food and obviously bossa nova has like this massive menu you can get anything chicken alfredo pasta and also get you know but they but they're a known like it's brazilian based and they do this like delicious these delicious protein plates like you like a chicken plate with like beans and rice if that's like your thing how's the rice i think it's delicious i think for somewhere that is kind of like a fast foodie did not fast food but like a chain that you know is a takeout kind of situation the quality is delicious also if you're brazilian you know what punch queijo is which is like these little cheese breads some of my favorite in la that I found is the Bossa Nova Pão de Queijo.

1:11:16I don't know if they make it from scratch or not, but it's so good. And sometimes I'll literally just order that from there. And there's also this soda from Brazil called Guarana that I love and they have it at Bossa Nova. So sometimes I literally will just order Pão de Queijo and Guarana and call it a day. But I've ordered from there literally for years. Okay, maybe I'll finally give it a go. Give it a go. and they're open really late sometimes when you're coming home like on a late night and you're starving you don't want to eat pizza you know you what hate pizza you hate pizza period period why i don't know i don't know do you hate cheese no i like cheese i think it's like i like protein yeah i don't know what it i don't know what it what is it you you love protein being the reason you love rice i don't know what it is it's just do you like pasta love do you like dessert i love dessert do you like ordering dessert at a restaurant every single time every single time every single time i go out to eat i ask to see the dessert menu no you don't swear to god what is that why are you so irked by that wait like and you what is the irk with that you don't like you're not like oh my god i have to go i have to go i have to get the fuck out of here no we don't have the same issue with that i have to go an hour or less that's why i get it i if i'm at the end of a very long dinner and i need to get home i will skip it because i just cannot wait any longer but like i'm the type of person well well we're still having the meal i'll ask to see the dessert menu okay but like rush while you're still having the meal while i'm still having the meal that's usually most of the time what i do have you had the mango sticky rice at Anna Jack.

1:13:04It's amazing. You've never had it? No, it's amazing. I'll eat that. Okay, thank you. So you're not like an anti-dessert person? No, I just... I just... I need a sweet bite at the end of a really savory meal. I have to have it. Go to Go Greek. So you'd rather stop at another place? Yes. Yes. That's worse to me than waiting for the dessert at the restaurant. Oh, I need to move. I get it. Have you ever been to Friendly's? Of course. I'm from the East Coast. That's why I was asking. Yeah. Best. You know, I think they're like shutting down. That's sad. Friendly's is this chain on the East Coast. You can get like a burger and fries, but then like an amazing ice cream sundae.

1:13:43Like the most insane ice cream sundaes you'll ever have ever in your entire life. So good. Fuck. They got to bring Friendly's back. I know. Oh my God. I haven't had Friendly's in such a long time. I didn't even like think about that. I know. I would say, would you not agree that the East Coast, when I was growing up, we had like our, those little soft serve ice cream shops. Like the small town drive up ice cream shops that you would go for like a straight up cone with a twist. Yes. We had so many of those in the area where I grew up. And I think about it now and I'm like, I wouldn't know where to go for that in LA.

1:14:22They don't have that here. They don't have it in the same way where it's like a little stand that you walk up to and just order at the window and you could get, you know, an ice cream sundae or like a cone with soft serve or like a chocolate dip. You know where they have that actually? Have you ever been to Heavy Handed? Uh-uh. Do you like burgers? No, I have. I've had the burgers. I've never been there, but I've had the burgers. They have a dipped cone. Oh, really? Okay, I need to go there. Fire. Okay, I need to go there. Fire. Like stupid. Okay, I get that. It's like actually the best thing ever.

1:14:51But that's so East Coast-y to me. It is very East Coast-y. Like everywhere you could be in New Jersey, you could be in New York. You can find one in any little town on the East Coast. Do you think you want to live in LA forever? Do you want to raise kids here or do you want to? I think I do for now because this is where we are. I think as my son gets older and if I have more kids, we'll see. But we kind of move around a lot as it is. Yeah. Yeah, we travel. like we bop around a little bit so i don't always feel like i'm just stationary here right we'll see i don't think i'll ever move back to like new york or anything i kind of want to move to new york really i know it's just the dating like uh the dating pool there bad everywhere no but like here i can't i can't i can't i can't i can't anymore i get it i've ran i think i've ran through Stop.

1:15:48I think I'm like, but not even sexually. Like I ran through like on the apps. Just talking. Like I ran through talking. I can't find people. They're like, I'm on Hinge and they're like, we have no one to show you. Do you know how sad that is for Hinge to be like, we have no one to show you? There are no new people to show you. And I'm like, I'm in Los Angeles. But I feel like everyone feels that way. It's hard. Yeah. But I want a New York summer. That's what I want. I want a New York summer. That sounds fun to me. Yeah. I want Brat Summer 2.0. I feel it in my bones and I want it. Yeah. I feel like this year is going to be an amazing year, an amazing summer.

1:16:26Please. It's going to be great. Don't you worry. This summer was boring. This last summer, I was bored. 2025 was like an interesting year to me. It felt like a very transitional year. Like I had so much happened for me in that year. It was like I had my son in 2024 going into 2025 and then it was like my first real year of motherhood. and I sold my company. It was such a big transitional year for me that I feel like now in 2026, I feel very settled. So it makes me more excited for this year. Yeah, I'm excited, I think. How old are you? Guess. 26. Yes. Yes. I was going to say 25 or 26, but. Somebody once sat there and looked me dead in the eye and guessed 31.

1:17:11What? Yes. You do not look 31, not even close. Thank you. Thank you. My husband's 31 and I don't think you look. He's 31? He also looks a lot younger than 31. He looks very young. Yeah, he's almost 32. Where in Canada is he from again? He's from a town called Stratford. Is that near Toronto? It's like two hours outside of Toronto. Because I'm going to Toronto tonight. I was like, I need Toronto Rex. You're going to Toronto tonight? Yes. Do you have Rex? Oh my God. Yeah, I do. You're going to have fun. I'm excited. I have a couple of Rex for you. Are you ready again to tell me what's wrong? Oh, is this the part where you read things?

1:17:43Yay. Yay. This is fun. I'm genuinely so scared to hard launch my new relationship of a few months. Everything in my life will change. Like he's my best friend's stepbrother and she doesn't know. Oh, we all go to the same college, so I really don't want to make it weird. But we've fallen for each other and decided to keep it a secret up until now. In case things didn't work out, but now it's too far and I'm not ready for all this pressure. How do we break the news? So my advice would be go sit down with your friend first. Right. and say hey I didn't want to say anything until I knew what this was but this is the situation obviously that's tricky if it's their stepbrother but if you guys are in love you're in love like what is anybody gonna do I would just have a conversation with your friend first before they find out another way and feel hurt what's your favorite besides swag favorite Justin album because I have mine journals is mine really that's my best friend Peyton's too who's like the biggest, biggest believer.

1:18:43And then other than that would be purpose. Mine's justice. Really? You don't understand. I, that album, I texted it in my group chat today. Front period to period back period. And then I wrote, follow it up. And it's that serious. And it's that serious. What was your, did you get to go to the justice store? No. Oh, sad. And I lost my virginity to ghost. Yes. Oh my God, Jake. Well, I didn't lose my virginity to ghost, but I lost my virginity that night. and I went home and Justice had come out. So I was like, well, let me just go listen to Justice. And I listened to Ghost on repeat in my bed. It's a great song.

1:19:18Which means that's for the guy lost my virginity to. Right. What's your favorite song off that album? Ghost, of course. But I love Off My Face. I love As I Am. I love... Oh, you're going to be like, are you going to cry at Coachella? Yeah. Stop it. I love... You are the only. Oh, yeah, anyone. Anyone. I love that song. I found my dad is having an affair with my stepmom via text messages. Wait. What? What? So he's having an affair on your stepmom or with your stepmom? Cheating on the stepmom. Okay. Okay. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. And he's freaking out so much that he's offering to pay my rent for the next six months, period.

1:20:05So, like, what do I do? because I'm not super shocked this happened, but I actually really like my stepmom. But damn, mama could really use that rant. Help. I would say if you're really close with your dad, it's probably about having a conversation with your dad and being like, look, I don't feel comfortable knowing this information. Please stop trying to bribe me into like not saying anything. I think it's a conversation of saying, it's not fair for you to ask me to keep this a secret when it's such a big deal. I do have respect for my stepmom and I really like her. it's on you to have a conversation with her i'm not gonna tell you you have to do it tomorrow but if you don't have a conversation with her i will i will help and rent could keep me quiet for like the next six weeks right i would take the rent if i were you i would take but is it take the rent and don't say anything because that seems a little mean take the rent and be like at the end of the six months when you're paying the rent like say something like that's what i would do i don't think it's about the person saying something i think it's about having the conversation with the dad to be like you need to say something like this is your relationship and you're disrespecting the person that you're married to thousand and the fact that your own child has to even tell you that is beyond me but right you know i think it's about saying like you're better than this and have a conversation with her i wonder what i would prescribe for that maybe what's that movie with Cameron Diaz Nicki Minaj oh yeah the other woman the other woman yeah best great movie best Jake and gorgeous guest you I'm a brand new mother 14 months and my husband is very heavily hinting that he wants to start our next I do want more children the issue is your girl is exhausted he's great honestly and helps a lot but I don't think I'm ready to go through it again so soon he's so sweet but how do I bring this up to him without breaking his heart it's your body you have to just do what feels good for you carrying a baby and giving birth and the first whole entire year of motherhood is so intense and so crazy that I would hope that your partner would be understanding enough to know that and know that it really should it can be your decision together but definitely there shouldn't be any pressure on when and I think there's always like a kind and sensitive way to just say hey I'm not ready right now

1:22:30I live with three other girls and one of them is so selfish like hasn't brought anything to our living situation on top of that she's a pathological liar and always lies about her relationships she's a total social climber literally how do I manage living through the rest of the semester or possibly humble her just have an honest conversation well that doesn't work for everyone especially I know I'm saying oh sorry run that back she said she's a crazy liar yeah okay i missed that i missed that yeah pathological liar oh i know and she's stuck for the rest of the semester dealing with a pathological liar is crazy i can't stand a liar and i catch them every single time do you call them out liars yeah of course if it's like a bad enough situation like i hate people that lie okay i mean listen i think we all like are capable of telling lies and little white lies but like an actual pathological liar that you can like catch it's a different breed that continues to then don't get me started because it like pisses me off to no end start start what's the craziest lie you've ever caught someone in i can't stand a person who is the i didn't say that oh my god i just like sleeper cell like i'm like i because you did say that no no but you very blatantly did say that and then and then it makes you feel super crazy because then I'm like well did did they not like that is my least favorite thing ever yeah that makes I get really angry too I also like can't lie because um like my OCD is very like you'll like I'm very like uh superstitious yeah I'm like if I lie I'll get bad luck like if I like tell this lie like bad things will happen because I'm like I just also think the older you get you realize how much easier it is to just own up to something and move past it than it is to lie and keep the lie going.

1:24:22Right. Like I get anxiety when I'm watching TV shows and they're lying, lying, lying, lying and covering it up and I'm like, do you know how much, Carrie, you lied. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. You texted me last, she texted me last night. I can't believe, because somebody said to her you lied and she said she didn't. I'm like the amount of times Carrie on Homeland somebody will say to her you lied to me and she goes, no, I didn't. Yes, you did. Right. Like I get like anxiety for characters in TV shows when I'm like, do you know how much easier this would be if you just told the truth? Told the truth.

1:24:54Like this lie is going to like spiral out of control and it's going to be a crazy thing. That like gives me anxiety for people that are made up. I'm trying to think of like, I just, I also just watched a show where that happened and I, maybe it was beast in me. I forget, but I remember being like, I've never felt this type of way ever in my entire life. No, I get so much anxiety about it. I'm like, just deal with it. Tell the truth. Do you watch Industry? Mm-mm. Okay, that's like a theme in Industry. You would love Industry. I need to start it. I've been seeing so much about it. Maybe that's my next watch.

1:25:27She's seen it twice through. It's so good. Okay, fine. That's my next. You will. She'll love Yaz. Your Roman Empire is going to be Yaz. Whatever that means. No, like you are going to love her. It is the best show on television. Okay, great. It's the best show on television. Oh my God, love. Yes. And there's three seasons to watch. And the just more for me and Jake to text about. Yes. Before road was available in Sephora. And I. Send me road. Do you remember? Like, hey, like, I really need more glazing milk. It's my favorite product. And what did I do? You said it to me on a Sunday. Because me and Jake, we met at the gym.

1:26:01We did. This is we actually should give our backstory. I met Jake at Aloe Yoga. Sounds very L.A. And. It's the truth. But it's the truth. We met at the gym. and you just have such a gorgeous personality. And you're so fun and so funny. And I was like, I like him. Oh, I like you. I know. And here we are. Well, speaking of fitness and Aloe, this question is, I really need to turn around my fitness goals for this year. Jake and presuming sexy guest, I've noticed you've been working out a ton and want to know your take on motivation. I have none. I can't get out of bed in the morning unless I have to.

1:26:39And I'm not like sad or anxious. and just like kind of not putting in the effort. What are some pointers for getting that discipline back? Thanks. Mine is like toxic. But I'm just going to say it. Like you have to look at people you're jealous of. Like you have to. Like I wasn't going to work out the other day. And somebody popped up on my feed. They were working out. I was jealous of them. It was another gay guy. And I was like, I have to get my ass up. You were like, I got to do it. And also there be, tell me if you disagree. I don't think that has to be seen as jealousy. I think that could be seen as like motivation.

1:27:11Thousand. I actually really appreciate your honesty about it being about jealousy because I think that's so honest but it also is just motivation. Right. You know what I mean? My thing is like also I got to a point tell me if you disagree when I started working out where like it actually like I felt better in the head. A hundred percent. It's amazing for your mental. And when you start working out because it makes you feel better in the head because you're thinking less about your body a hundred percent it becomes easier like this yeah louise literally looked at me and was like i feel like everything you've been doing like it all hit at once yeah and it's because i switched my meds and i stopped thinking about my body as much yeah everything was like working in sync which is amazing like the mind body soul body connection is so real and i think when you do when you're somebody who doesn't work out and then you do start working out, I think when that clicks for you, that everything is so connected, you start to be like, oh my God, I feel better here.

1:28:11I feel better here. My body feels better. And then also you start seeing results and that makes you want to keep going because you're like, I look good. I feel good from the inside to the outside. And it's all one big connection. I guess my advice for that person would be start slow start with little things go for a 20 minute walk like literally just start by going for a walk walking 20 minutes on the treadmill whatever it is you don't have to start by going to like hit classes you know what I mean I think people think they have to sweat and like do a crazy thing it's like you really don't have to do all that you can start slow try something new like take it step by step start by walking then try like a class or try you know Pilates or something that's a little bit more easy or just like go just go slow I feel like the misconception with working out and you just like touched on this is that like faster and harder and sweatier means you're losing more weight not true not at all do you do 12 330 um no okay so that's what I've done it I've done it before I don't know that I would call it 12 330 like I just would do incline walking but that that like is the magic trick walking yeah walking is just when I after I had my son the first thing I started doing was walking when I was like trying to lose the rest of my baby weight I started with walking I started doing like a lot of like rehab like super slow meticulous I didn't get in the gym and start doing jumping jacks because I felt like you can't you feel like your whole entire insides are gonna fall out after you have a baby but I started with walking.

1:29:48I'm like, I love walking and the Stairmaster. I'm a big Stairmaster fan. Stairmaster eats. Yeah. My ex is doing all this weird shit to get my attention and it's driving me crazy. He keeps dropping off like dead ass mixtapes on my porch, coming by my work to order food like almost every day. He doesn't even order from me. Oh, I guess this person is a service worker. And my friend told me he's trying to grow out a beard for me. Like I've never even indicated that I'd be into that sort of thing. I feel like I'm going crazy. Well, that sounds like... Maybe a restraining order. Yeah, I was going to say that sounds like a person you've obviously had clear conversations with and is just not respecting that.

1:30:28That's a tough one. Can't say I've been in that one before. Well, I definitely have it because you know I've never had a boyfriend. Right, we've talked about this. I'm sure we have. But you want to know why I don't think that's sad because then I think what's going to happen is you're gonna like meet the one. And then it's just gonna be like your beautiful story. I didn't really date like that. I didn't have like multiple boyfriends in my lifetime before I got married. But I'm 26. So? You have a whole life ahead of you. But that's what I'm trying to say is like that just means to me that when you do end up in a relationship, it's gonna be like a really beautiful like because it's like you'll have like waited to be in that special thing with that special person.

1:31:12I know. You told me 29 was so young. You're 26. Like, we're babies. We are babies. We are in Sex and the City. Are they all, like, 30? Yeah. Wow. Maybe I should watch Sex and the City. They're all, like, 32, I think. Like, they're a little bit. Yeah, they're in their 30s. And it's that you like the show? I loved the show. Like, you laughed out loud at the show? I did. Okay. We're going to start texting about Carrie. Okay. Trust me. I'm going to give it a go. Well, I'm doing the Americans now. I'm on my spy kick. Great. Love that. Didn't you dress up as spies for Halloween once? This year? No. Last year we were Kim Possible.

1:31:50Oh, that's what I'm thinking of. And then this year we were The Incredibles. That's what I'm thinking of. And Jack was Jack. Yeah. It was so cute. He had like the little thing. That is really cute. And I dressed him up as baby Justin, which was like so cute and funny. I mean, that rocked my world. In like the purple hoodie. It was crazy. That rocked my world. It was so funny. Hi, Jake. I love you. Love you. My cousin and I were best friends our whole life. We live together and spend all our time together. I have had a boyfriend for five years and I've always made time to hang out with her. She's had multiple boyfriends and every single time she gets one, she ditches me and never hangs out with me.

1:32:21That's literally going to be me. Never even text calls or anything. She always comes crawling back whenever her and her, whatever boyfriend she has at the time breaks up. What the fuck do I do? How do I stop letting her come back and use me when it's convenient for her? Well, I'm the cousin, so I can't, I can't give advice on this. I guess my question would be, have you told your cousin how you feel and that you feel like she comes back to like use her relationship when it's convenient for her? I think I just think you can never lose by being honest when you go to somebody that you have a close relationship with and say, hey, this is how you've been making me feel.

1:32:58And I just need to say it and have a conversation with you because what do you lose by being honest? They don't have to agree with you. They could be offended by what you say. But what do you lose by being honest? I guess maybe for people that are people pleasers, which I am, by the way, I'm like the most massive people pleaser. But the older that I've gotten, it has gotten easier for me to just because because I've so much more thought, well, what do I have to lose? If you get mad at me for expressing myself and laying out a boundary, then you're not really supposed to be here anyway. And I should know that.

1:33:29Right. I think people that like when I used to be scared of that it's like I feel like maybe I'm dismantling the entire relationship we've built because it's built on me not being honest with you and me pleasing your interests. You know what I mean? But people are allowed to change. Totally. So maybe it was built on that in the beginning because you didn't have the confidence or the personal boundaries to be able to say what you needed to say or do that. But you've grown. Your older time has gone on. So like you've evolved into a person that now can do that. I'm only saying this out of personal being able to relate to that.

1:34:04And I feel like it got even crazier for me after I had a kid. Whereas like before it was really hard for me to be, to set really clear boundaries with people because I was, I'm such a people pleaser and I struggle with that. I'm like, I don't want them to get mad. I hate people being mad at me. More than anything. I hate people being mad at me. I get such bad anxiety. I hate feeling like I have issues with people. Like I hate it, hate it, hate it. Like I would rather squash anything, figure anything out just to like have like clear slates with anyone and everyone. Yeah. and then I realized as I got older it's just like that's just not possible with every single person because everybody's different and we have different views and different opinions and you grow away from people and you you know have to be able to set clear boundaries and after I had my son I was just like wait it's so much easier to just draw a line and be like hey I actually like that doesn't work for me anymore and that doesn't make me feel comfortable and like I'm not I'm not doing this anymore is it because you feel like you have this like person that like you created and like you're taking care of so you can like um not not like rationalize but like maybe like ground yourself I think what it is is a couple different things I think you are their advocate and then it may for me personally it made me realize I'm his advocate therefore I'm my also my own advocate and if I would stick up for him in any situation like I would never ever ever let as a parent you're so protective of your kid and I'm like it made me that protective of myself right too if I'm his advocate I can be my own advocate if I could stand up and say anything to anybody for him then I can do it for myself and listen I've always been the type of person where I have a strong personality.

1:36:02And when you push me to a certain point, I'm going to say what I need to say. Like I'm not shy about, and I never was. I'm the type of person where, yes, I've struggled with being a people pleaser, wanted people to like me. I hated ruffling feathers. I was like not super confrontational, but with the people I trust and I'm close to, if you want to go there, we can go there. And like if you push me, then I'm going to go there. It's just that I'm at a point in my life now where it doesn't take much for me to go there. I'm not going to hold back how I feel about a situation. And I think I've just been in situations in my life where I've tried and tried constantly over and over again, put myself out there with certain people, like did the same thing over and over until I've just was pushed to a point where I'm like, I'm going to just say what I need to say.

1:36:53because like this has reached a point where now you're like taking advantage and I can't. What is it like to not want conflict and be a people pleaser when you are a public person, your job is public and like people get upset over things that you didn't intend? It's a struggle. You know what I mean? I still am a people pleaser. I'm still somebody who I want people to like me. I want, I think it's actually, it's turned into more of like I I want to be understood and I think that it's so easy to misunderstand people and pick things apart and see like a tiny sliver of such a bigger picture um and I do think I've realized that there's just no explaining yourself no amount of explaining yourself I think I used to struggle so much with over explaining myself and trying to explain who I am to people and like why this wasn't my intention and this was and that's not what happened and this is and that's not the truth and but this is but it really doesn't make a difference at all and it took me so many years to realize that and I still struggle with it sometimes but at a certain point you have to be able to just be like okay and just keep it moving and move on it doesn't mean it hurts any less it doesn't mean that it doesn't bother me any less but I think you you deal with it for so many years that you have to be able to be like okay but then also again having boundaries and protecting yourself is also okay and it's also completely fair to stick up for yourself when you feel that it's necessary I think it's about like picking your battles but I still struggle with being a people pleaser I don't I don't know that that's ever gonna just like magically disappear one day Yeah, because at the end of the day, it's like, that's who you are.

1:38:40It is. It is. I think like innately we want to, I don't even want to say be liked, but I think like we want to feel connected to each other. And I think when you feel like somebody doesn't like you, it feels like you're disconnected from that person and like they aren't giving you the chance to connect. You're like, you think maybe like you're doing something wrong too. You're like, what am I doing wrong that like isn't allowing this puzzle piece to work? a lot like well what did I ever do to you it makes you feel like that you've done something to make them not like you and I think that's on like a massive level when you're in the public because it's like well what the fuck did I ever do to you I don't even know you and then it's that times like millions of people and then you get caught up in a cycle of constantly trying to prove yourself I'm here to prove why you should like me and like why I didn't do that thing that you said that I'm doing it it can be like really mentally exhausting and crazy do you have anyone you like go to for like advice I mean I have friends that are in you know similar position and have been in it way longer than I have and they get it more than anybody does so I feel happy and grateful that I have people that I can that can totally relate to it and be like yep totally get it feel the exact same way.

1:39:57It's so annoying. At least we have each other to vent. What's the best advice you've ever been given on like your like career in life and like being frustrated? Not responding is probably the best. Every time I've wanted to react to something or respond to something in a space where I was worked up about it and I went to a friend that was like, do not respond to this. Do not react to this as hard as that is. They always ended up being right. that not reacting and not responding was the best thing to do and just ignoring and keeping life moving because the reality is people will be on to something else they'll they'll move on to the next subject they'll move on to the next thing and I think a big mistake that I've made many times in my life was like responding or reacting and explaining myself and then like making the situation way bigger yeah you know well Hayley what did we learn today that Carrie is manic she is she is manic we learned that you love your supplements love my supplements love my vitamins all of it and that i need to try bossa nova brazilian cuisine and that you need to try bossa nova what's your favorite like protein do you like chicken what a great question what's my favorite because you just said before you don't like pizza because you love protein which by the way which is what we learned today which is by the way a lie like that i think i pulling anything to like excuse why I don't like pizza.

1:41:26I think chicken. I feel like a good chicken thigh, like a juicy, charred, grilled, spiced chicken thigh. Yum. Yeah. Yeah. I'm so with you on that. What's your favorite protein? Can this be the opener teaser? Can this be the teaser for the episode? So what's your favorite protein? I would say chicken as well. It's amazing. Yeah. It's amazing. Chicken is really good. well thank you for being my season premiere thanks for having me i love you i love you we've been talking about this for so long i know and we need to we finally made our pen pal relationship we did it's so real because jake sends me screenshots between him and his love interests and it's like what do i do what do i say and i'm like i was like oh i thought i thought what he said was like kind of really nice no it's not that's the worst part though I'm telling you here's my plan I'm gonna go back in three months he sent me something and I was like well at least he was really honest with you like I think that's what did I say and you were like here let's read it hold on wait but for you know that this is after one day right what wait yeah no judgment that is totally fine but what I am gonna say is is it okay let me ask you this actually because now we have some of the details is it do you did you feel like crazy rejected or something because he hung out with you one time and you felt like he made a decision about you and hadn't given you the chance to get to know you enough um I said some pretty outrageous and outlandish things okay so you said this texted me morning woke up to this literally literally feel physically ill and then I said oh gee I mean props for the honesty you said I don't buy it but yeah because I don't I don't and then and then follow-up text two questions for you is it okay if I wear road eye patches in my promo video for season three of therapists yes I'm not gonna read the time now I feel like I'm like oh you sent me another one you said

1:43:35holy shit homeland time after the worst weekend of my life because it was the worst i was a i was first of all he sends me screenshots of this text with this guy the number isn't saved i have this person's phone number i could text him if i wanted to and then you go for context on my horrible weekend where you said we went on one date i'd see i did at least i'm at least i'm somewhat honest and i said dating is truly hell it's hell it's hell and then you said sorry i know you don't care but we'll literally talk to anybody about this situation who will listen and then i say no i care

1:44:20no I care we'll talk about it with you all day if you needed me to how nice she's like go get fucked yeah seriously please catch a dick and then we just jump right back into homeland of course you need to start industry that is what we okay I will I will I will I will but we do need a show that we watch together you know what I will say about this guy is that maybe you guys can circle back to it in like a little bit and like maybe when he doesn't feel like it was so intense. Listen to her, please. I'll send you road eye patches. And among other things, she's also launching pimple patches. Whatever you want just to give him another chance.

1:44:58Glazing milk, glazing spray. You're a catch. 10 out of 10. Stop it. I love you. And if he doesn't want to hang out with you again, then his loss. Your loss. And mine. Jake, stop. And mine. pussies thank you for joining us for the premiere of season three with the one and only hilly bieber thanks for watching i love you bye pussies

1:45:26so

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