Session 143: Nicole Kidman & Sandra Bullock

27:41Really? Oh, big time. Yeah, yeah. Big time. You can really trigger her into. Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah. That just reminded me, you're in Bird Box, where the world does end. It does. Yes. And you want to be at my house if shit goes down. Wait, that's one of my favorite movies. You do. That's one of my favorite movies of all time. I've got stuff there. That is one of my favorite apocalypse movies of all time, which is, by the way, my favorite genre. I've seen every apocalypse movie. Really? Under the sun. I'm fascinated by, like. Same director as this film. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. She's fantastic.

28:11But I thought Bird Box was such a fascinating concept. The fact that we have a film out of it is a miracle because I'm literally running. We're in a jungle running around with the blindfold. I'm like, I'm going to be method and I'm going to do this without. I ran into cameras. I ran into, you know, it was, it was, it was insanity. And, and as long as the heart of it was taking care of your kids and what would you do is like the Sophie's choice moment. I think I said, as long as we have that as the grounder of like, what would a mama do in this situation? And how does she do it? And how does she get them out of it?

28:43I think you can do anything as insane as it was. We're like, as long as it feels real to those people who are in it. Right. You know, and I said, if we got that, we'll be fine. And that was one of the first streamer Netflix movies at the time, if I remember. Right. One. Yeah. I think Will Smith had one like he had the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Would there would there ever be a second in the works? they talked about it but i was like do i really want to i mean we made bird box during a time when things were really bucolic and peaceful and the world and everything seemed very calm do i want to make something that really depicts where my mind's already at right now with all my little panic boxes for me and the kids should anything happen my son's like oh come on mom really i'm like we need to have your hepa filter you have asthma like i load up the car faster than anyone yeah so with that kind of mentality do i want to be making a film which you know when i film i'm from beginning middle and end in that same headspace i don't want to do that right now you know i don't want to sit in that world when kind of feels like like it could happen yeah yeah yeah yeah but i will be prepared for it i i was watching disclosure day the other day and i was like oh my god like this could really just happen like i didn't i didn't see it i didn't see it so Okay, so it's about aliens.

29:59I feel they're going to be really nice when they get here. I also think so. I think they're here. I think they're here. We don't see them. They're watching us. Laughing, maybe. Not at you, but a lot at me. They're looking at Nicole going, good girl, Sandy. Not so much. Bad girl to me. I think they're here. Yeah, I also. Why would they not be here? I was turned into a believer from that movie. And I was like, I used to not believe in them. I used to really just be very matter of fact. and what I could see is what was there. But I don't know. Lately I've been, after re-watching the first Practical Magic and watching the second the other day and then watching Disclosure Day, I'm like, God, maybe there is more than meets the eye here.

30:38I think there for sure is. Yeah. I just love being here now. I mean, we can all get caught up in, oh, my gosh, there's this and there's that and everything, but then it's like, well, we're here now. Stay right here, right now, and enjoy the moment. how do you guys stay present in like such incredible moments that feel so out of body like you've both won oscars like how do you stay present in those left our bodies when we won i had two hours of sleep that night i was hiding a newborn i had no sleep that night i had nothing i messed up someone i presented for someone don't remember i couldn't read the teleprompter the poor gentlemen didn't have a very good like I I was a mess I don't remember what I said I was I just wanted to get home for a feeding like eat which is actually a nice balance yeah like I had this incredible moment that I can't remember but I was yearning to be back home for the moment that I was hiding so you know and I was beyond lonely I had the pinnacle of my success and I went home and was so lonely.

31:45Oh, I'm so sorry. Yeah, crazy though, that sort of the confluence of events where you go, I wish I had, like I had my mom with me and my dad, but I was like, where's my partner? Where's someone that I can share this with? Where you can jump on the bed? You didn't have your babies. I've got my daughter here right now. She's watching it. I'm not pointing to some random because she's got a bunch of babies in the corner. She brings like these infants and has them in the corner. But I was so, yeah, it was like one of the most profound moments where I went, I've got to get a life. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

32:16And at the same time, I'm holding this gold statue where you go, this is it. This is the highest sort of prize you can get in our industry. And so grateful and yet so lonely. Did it feel almost like, okay, now I can. Weird is what it felt. It actually felt like I'd love to be able to just, you know, be wrapped in somebody's arms right now. And the actual, what? But you know that feeling where you go, I'd love to be earthed now. Something that feels really, okay, this is my real life. But was that like something you were reaching for? It then became Quest, yeah. Well, it was just like, oh, I realize what, the chasm.

33:03Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Wow. You realize what work doesn't fill. So it's interesting what those things do. You think work fills up the cup? Yeah. And it does in the moment because there's a lot to think about it. But when you go home, it's an empty cup. I think that's probably why a lot of people take it home because that's their sustenance. And if that's not what fills your cup, you go home, you're like, it's still empty. Right. How are you guys able to separate work and life? When do you feel like you both discovered how to do that and find that proper balance? I think once you have kids, in terms of just going, okay, I've really got to learn how to compartmentalize.

33:42At the same time, I've still got to be able to have my artistic, creative expression. So a lot of it is sharing it. Like my daughter's sitting over there. She's very aware of all the things that I go through. Both of them are. And it's a very shared experience. And that kind of becomes beautiful then. Yeah. So if it blurs, you're able to then talk about it with your family. You're jumping now. I'm dominating.

34:20It's different on every day. I'm a mom first. I am no good to any film production if I'm not great there and they're not great. I didn't work for four years. I mean, I didn't work in front of the camera. I had other creative things, but I chose not to be, you know, I can't. Like, if something is not right, I can't show up. I don't know how to flip that switch. So if there's the opportunity to be there, they're good, and they're really good, and they can be right by my side, I can be there. And that's few and far between. I mean, they're 16 and 13, both in the halves, but now they want nothing to do with me.

34:59But I still need everything to do. because you raise them to leave you. You know, you raise the things you love the most to leave you, and I'm like, I'm not good at it. Yeah. No. You want them to go, I'm ready to go out. She's independent. They're bald, independent. I see the looks in her. I see the look in her eyes. She's like, I'm so out of here. I'm going to let mom think I'm here, but I'm not. But that's what you want, and that's the most painful thing ever. So I'd rather spend all my time with them, and then when they're out the door, I'm going to be I'm going to have an empty cup have you guys ever seen you'll have me I'll be I'll be no because you'll be tracking her everywhere I know I'll be following my kids like a hoodie like a balaclava and a black car SUV that's like my dad yeah I get your dad yeah my dad will not let go I will why why should we yeah what's the point there's like certain things he has that he I let him still feel like he has like he won't let me drive does he live here yeah We all live here, and I do not drive.

36:02So he comes and drives you everywhere? Well, no, but he likes to sometimes. How sweet is that? Yeah. I told my son, I was like, if you go to college, if you go to that college there, you could live here. I'll do the laundry. Yeah. I'm not making wise choices right now. I get that. Yeah. Your dad and I are. It's like his one thing. I'm like, okay, I won't drive. I don't want to drive. Is he afraid that something might happen to you? He's like, you'll crash. Are you not a good driver? I don't think I am. I've never tried. Wait a minute. You don't even have a license? You don't have your license?

36:29No, I grew up in New York. Okay, can we please do something where we just take you on the road and teach you how to drive? Yes. By the way, excellent driver. I won't be in the car. Wait, yes. Yes, you will. Yes, you will. You will take care of all the other things. Watch out! Speed three. Car! Turn! It'll be a very slow speed three. It'll be the slowest of all the speeds. Come on, let's teach you how to drive. Yeah. You and my son, because he's getting ready to take the little driver's license test. So, like, the whatever the... What is it called? Hermit. Yeah, that one. Rhyth can dry. It's like, do not talk to me.

37:04I'm not here. Well, if you didn't want us to focus on you, you shouldn't have come in the room. She's okay. I see it because of you. She's got no interest in us. Do you like the show? Love it. Oh, my God. Thank you. Thank you, Amazon Prime, for sponsoring today's episode. If you are 18 to 24 years old, I am insanely jealous of you, not because of your youth, but because you are eligible for Prime for young adults. I've never been so sad to be 26, not just because I'm closer to 30, but because Prime for Young Adults is basically your own Prime membership, not your parents, yours. And Prime for Young Adults is half the price of regular Prime, which is$7.49 a month.

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38:27Thank you Prime for sponsoring tonight's episode. What are you guys, I was so curious to ask you, what are you watching on television or movies right now or what are you listening to? The Nadal documentary. I love tennis. Who is that? It's going to be something really intelligent and fancy. Go ahead, Nicole. And what am I listening to right now? Tell us what the documentary is about. Nadal, the tennis player Rafa yeah oh what did you think I said that's why I thought you looked blank both of you when I said it because we felt really stupid just that we went oh she's watching that you gotta watch it it plays it's extraordinary because he plays through so much pain it's fascinating yeah I feel better don't you feel better now that we know this I feel so much better now that you didn't know as well I do feel better I do feel better it's the Aussie accent sometimes it just switches things sounds up I can do British then or American.

39:25What do you want? Irish? No, the Aussie is nice. It's nice. I love the Aussie. You don't want British. No, no. I like that. I don't want you British. You don't want that? Little bit? I can go like South London. Wow. Shut up. She's like, that wasn't very good. It was superb. What are you watching? When I'm working on a film, until it's locked, I don't allow myself to watch anything that will make me wish I was doing what they were doing. Do you know what I mean? Something that will inspire me. So I watch things that are sort of really fun. Like I just went, I think I'm on the, I'm in the reality wrap.

40:05Yeah, I was about to say, are you tattooed on reality? I'm like, which one? Is it Vanderpump? No, Ultimatum. And I married at first sight. Love is blind. I love love is, I watch love is blind with love on the spectrum to sort of balance things out, you know. I love Married at First Sight. It's so good. What is the premise? You meet and you marry? Yes, you have a bunch of therapists. Okay, this is going to be good. I'm going to follow that. Who vet all the people. They've had people sign up, you know, a lot of people from social, people who really want to find love, a lot of people who are also just on it for the, you know, screen time.

40:41But they're vetted by these wonderful, wonderful therapists who find, you say, what is it that you want? You're supposed to be sincere and be really vulnerable because they're doing the search. It's arranged marriage. so they find you a partner you gear up they come to your house two weeks from now you're getting married oh my god the family have to tell my dad he hates me he's disowning me but I'm gonna do it anyway because I want love and so it's that whole process and then they meet at the altar and nine times out at what eight times out of ten it's a wicked good wedding because they have a wedding they walk down the aisle they have a party inevitably they're wasted they have a really good time it's it's strangers so you're like oh this person's fantastic you know do you want to consummate it all like they're literally meeting and they're talking about will you consummate your your marriage i'm like you just met five minutes ago it's fabulous and then they have to go live together they get to go to a vacation together literally get married though they get married there yes contract and everything yes but no one talks about if this is a legally binding marriage and you want to get divorced does the show saddle you with the divorce process do they i don't know but if someone's genuinely going on they're going i'm doing a bad job in my life finding a partner can you find them for me i think it's a great concept go on a date that would that you have to well they have a date it's called a wedding date what have you guys noticed to be the most different about like this i the idea of fame and celebrity over the past 20 30 years like what has changed the most in your eyes what's considered fame and I think it goes back to what you were saying so beautifully about social media gives you control and access to your own narrative you get to say this is who I am this is how I want to present versus the old studio system which you were curated controlled and you didn't have access to your voice to sort of dispel a rumor or doing that it's just magnified now you can be there's different levels of how to express yourself you know um but i realized how many creatives there are because content is hard and you watch these people who create many stories and they get their families involved and it's i love storytelling that way i go it's it's i'm trying to find the beauty in it and not the things that are so harmful to kids because i have a daughter who doesn't have an iphone and she's at camp and she's like next if you want me to go next year you know i'm gonna need a phone i'm like no you're That's the point of camp.

43:07Yeah, exactly. No bones. So I think it's, I love watching people create, like with what you have in your house and your imagination and writing. And so I think there's a different way to be creative and known for it rather than this hierarchy of this is a movie star and this is who you are and you are very important, you know. There's different ways to make stories come alive, you know. So that's my feeling. Right, and you see that now with like creator-led projects like Backrooms or Obsession. Yeah. Have you seen back rooms? Yeah. It's cool. Yeah. It's cool. What is it? So Oscar Perkins, I think, was one of the producers or mentor for him.

43:45It was, it started off on actually. Yeah. It was a Reddit thread about, it was this, like, if I, you will know if I'm explaining this wrong. It's like, there was a photo on Reddit of, like, this creepy room. And it just became this, it all started from this one photo and it became the back rooms of like this like really like unidentified spaces. And this YouTuber, I'm blanking on his name, made a movie about it. And he's like 20 years old. Do you know? Kane Parsons. Kane Parsons. And the premise of it is what? Just like what happened in these rooms? It's like the premise of it is they work at this furniture store and this guy knocks down a wall by accident, if I'm remembering correctly.

44:28Oh my God, that's the best thing. I have recurring dreams of finding hidden rooms in the room. in houses that I live in that are outfitted and stuck in time. And you go, Oh my God, there's more stuff here. There's more to like, I'm sure there's a deep rabbit hole. You can go in for that. But that, that's a great concept. Yeah, it's cool. And it opened, what I liked about it is that it like opens up a whole world of movies. Like it's like you could go on the back rooms forever and ever and ever and ever. And then obsession. Oh, I loved obsession. I thought, I am, I'm sorry. I'm still stuck. I'm in ultimatum in season three.

45:02So I'm going to stay there until I'm finished. But you said something really cool, which I thought you said, I don't want to watch something that I wish I was a part of. What is a movie that each of you did that you thought to each other, like, oh, I wish I did that movie? I think my head would say, I wish I could do that. Yeah. I don't think I could do what Nick does. And I can't do what Sandy. I mean, Sandy is one of the greatest, if not the greatest physical comedian female working today. You are so incredible at that. She'll tell you why. She was, because you studied films. No, but I love how you found physical comedy.

45:38Yeah. Because it's literally wired in her since she was tiny. Yeah. It was through your mom, right? Yeah, well, I was raised between Germany and the United States. My mother was an opera singer, and we'd go for the opera seasons, and I was raised by my grandmother and my cousins. But in Germany at that time, and you had ATV with, you know, like a show from Italy in black and white or a show from France, and it was anyone who could physically translate a story to you, and usually through humor i was riveted by and then when we were in the states i would watch carol burnett jerry lewis lucille paul anyone with physical comedy abilities that could make you feel something without saying a lot and make you laugh and my mother is german had no sense of humor unless i fell or i'd like a ate it on the floor and i was like okay yeah i had nothing to do with her being German maybe it did um and I realized that that sort of accidental happening and making it truthful within that moment was gold for me I loved how to physically figure out how to make a moment real physically with comedy within a scene you know pull that chair out pull this and make this difficult don't tell me you did this you know it's it's it's thrilling to me my body wants to do it yeah is there a scene in one of your movies that you're most proud of where you feel like your physical comedy really shines yeah yeah it's it's small no one else would care but it was a scene that I had to do where I walked into a kitchen and had to shove try to just bake something in the microwave and then walk back and I said what I would like for you to do is pull the sheets out of the bed because she was having a hard day I said how do we show that other than And, you know, I'm having a hard day.

47:17You know, I said, I'm going to be making my frozen dinner. Pull the sheet out here. I'm going to wear a shoe that grips and has a rubber sole so it catches. Don't let the door work in the microwave. Put some utensils there, and I'll grab one and see if it works. And then do the same thing. Don't tell me where it is, but pull it out before I return into that shot. And it was a shot where it was like the first or second take. Everything works. It was one of my favorites from Miss Congeniality. It was like one scene where I'm just trying to make a frozen dinner. I rewatched that last night. So good.

47:48It's so good. It's just like to show your anger. Yeah. That way when like, that's what happens in life. You're pissed and then you're trying to get your car keys. You can't find your car keys but then your jacket sleeve is turned inside out. It's like I'm best when I'm between a rock and a hard place. Right. I didn't know you produced Miss Congeniality. Was that one of the first films you produced? Yeah, I produced some smaller ones. I didn't do very well. But they were learning ground. Yeah. Yeah. So that was my first one that sort of hit. Yeah. You and Melissa McCarthy. Oh, The Heat? Oh, so good.

48:22So good. We are the rock in the hard days. You know what I've rewatched of yours the other day was The Others. That's so good. It is so good. So good. Good. It's so good. It is one of the best twists. That's not physical comedy. Of all time. It's internal. Like flipping. Like you're like what you have to sell through your eyes. and through what she has to do in silence, it's incredible. But it was really interesting making the others because originally it was written where she's meant to have this wild red hair and look completely haggard and destroyed. And I was like, no, she needs to be so together and everything because she's so meticulous about protecting her children.

49:11Right. So that all comes from a place of perfect care and protection and wanting to have everything in order. And that's how that character started. What out of all the films you both have ever done has been the most fun to make for both of you? Practical magic. It was a hard shoot, though. We had a hard shoot. That was a hard shoot, Nicole. I'm like, oh, rose-colored glasses. I loved making boulain rouge. Yeah, because I got to fly on a trapeze. Yeah, I mean, when do you get to do that, right? Yeah. Be the courtesan who everybody is like, oh, and the sparkling diamond. Yeah. He did. He would always be like, the sparkling diamond in the sky.

50:06So, yeah, so that was fun. Singing, dancing, and acting. Yeah. What about for you? I mean, I have great times on set with the people. You have hilarious memories. I think the most thankful I've ever been on a project where I go, wow, who I was when I started versus who I was when I came out was probably Gravity because I got to push my body in a way. and I don't think I don't think the film does justice to how hard it was for those people to make that film you know the behind the scenes you look at you go this technology didn't it it was it was brutal but we went into it going I hope it works we didn't know if it would work up until the very last minute but who I was when I started versus who I was when I was done it was really I always look back on that really grateful I go you spat me out a person that I'm really proud of yeah I love that movie how long did it take to shoot it wasn't that long it was just isolating you know because I was in a box by myself with an earwig and no one to talk to for nine hours a day you know doing more because I had to do all the I did it you know I was going slow motion with my body zero G while I spoke in real time so by the end someone would hand me a water and George was like you know what you just did and I was like I have no idea he goes they said do you want a water and you went

51:33I was method acting it was just really profound how they believed in technology that had just been invented weeks before to tell this story that Alfonso had and that to me I'm really thankful for that because you see people's belief in their story and you sign on you go okay you're incredible filmmakers let's do it I will be my best as best as I can be my best yeah well you were fantastic gravity is i love space movies and i was i was you were diamond in the sky i was an astronaut in the sky you were in the sky you both you always do sync up you guys are like we do do you feel like real life sisters sometimes yeah yeah we're so i mean i feel like i could say anything to sandy and she'll listen process it and then give it give me some sort of profound advice.

52:26Or I just don't take it to the grave. Yeah. Anything she tells me, take it to the grave. Yeah, yeah. Both hold that. We hold. Really. Yeah. Spill the beans. What was that call like when you both decided to hop on for Practical Magic 2? It was a bunch of calls. We were leading towards it. But there was no like, should we do it? We're like, we're going to do it. Yeah. What do we extract from the book? Because the book is done. Beautiful stuff. There's three movies in that book. How do we make this relationship, which soars from the first one? Like, we didn't know it would do what that did, but there's something there.

53:01We have chemistry. It just happens. We do. You do. And we fight well, and we love well, and we're different enough to make it interesting every time there's either love or an argument. Yeah. So it wasn't a should we. We're like, okay, let's do it. How do we do it and honor the fans, the first film, but evolve it and bring in the new generation? I mean, excellent job at it, though. Yeah, how sweet are Maisie and Joey? Unbelievable. Is it true you brought your own tequila to that? She did. The first one, yeah. Second one, we were so cold and tired. Yeah, we were so tired and cold. There was no drunkenness.

53:40But did you guys get, like, tipsy for that first one? Yeah, a bit. Where we were really hammered was when we were sitting at the table insulting each other. All that sweat was real. Oh, and I never, what do you guys, what music are you listening to? I'm always so fascinated to know. Oh, I've gone down an old school hip hop road trip. I've just like, it's turned up the old, like, it's good. Like old Tupac, but all the stuff has the same sort of downbeat that you just, you can do no wrong. You can run on the treadmill. You can do that. You can do, it's, that's where I am right now. Hip hop road trip.

54:13I did a little hip hop road trip with Lil' Kim earlier this year. She's popping up everywhere. Yeah, yeah. Where is Lil' Kim these days is what I want to know. Do we know where she is? Maybe it's – God knows. Like, actually, God knows. But the Jump Off is one of the greatest rap songs of all time. She – no one gives her the credit she deserves. No one. At all. No one. At all. Same thing, Missy Elliott. I'm sorry. Missy Elliott needs to go back on tour. She needs to bring it back. There's just some people that need to – Yeah, we'll show up. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. If I saw the Jump Off live, I would be so in it.

54:49Yeah. we'll put that out there please Lil' Kim have Lil' Kim on your show yeah please would you yeah well don't say it okay Lil' Kim if you want to come on the show Sandra Bullock approved yeah we need you we really need you yeah and who are you listening to I jump around all the time you know my standard go to is Fred again just guess why not really yeah that's her favorite artist of all time oh really Yeah. Have you seen him live? No. Oh, you have to. Apparently his live shows are like. You were so good at going to concerts. Going to concerts. I love going to concerts. Oh, yeah, I saw you guys at Coldplay.

55:29Oh, that was a great night. How was that? We so needed that. Didn't we? That was out. I mean, I'd be lying if I'd say we didn't do crying. I mean, it was so, for some reason, so emotional and so vast, but so small. Like you look around, you go, how does one band make everyone love each other for two hours for just a moment? Yeah. There was no animosity. Like I had just been to the Kendrick and SZA concert with my son, and I was like, this is the greatest thing we've ever seen. You know, I'm trying not to embarrass him in the background. I'm just going to chill. I'm going to hang back. But my kids weren't there at this one, and there was no hanging back.

56:08It was unbelievable. I'm so jealous. I've never got to see them live. So, you know, they're touring in, I think, 2027. Go see it. It is like nothing. We'll all go together. The best part was. You're going to teach me to drive? Yeah, we're taking you to Coldplay. I'm also seeing Harry Styles on Halloween. Oh, I've seen him. He's spectacular. Excited. Yeah, he's spectacular. What's the best comment? You're invited to that. You're Madison Square Garden, right? Yeah. I invited you. Halloween. You said you'll be there maybe. I said be there maybe, but I go, kids. That means I won't be there. Not true.

56:39Not true. It's a new me. It's a whole new me. I'm coming out a little bit. Did you used to cancel plans? I'm coming now. That's such a good song. Diana Ross. See, that's another one. It's on my hip-hop road trip. Do you guys, what's the best concert you've ever been to? Oh, come on. You can't ask that. Prince. Prince. Oh, yeah. I saw Prince. He was singing right to me. He was on that speaker doing his push-ups right at me, looking right at me. I don't know if he knew it, but I felt it. Yeah. Yeah. A man in heels and earrings can steal any man's woman. Agreed. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. He could walk in.

57:18I'd be like, yes. Yep. I go to concerts, so I've seen everything. I saw Bowie. Really? Yeah. I loved Bowie. I've done, you name it, I've seen it. Yeah. So, yeah. ACDC. That would be great. Yeah. Back in Black? And Charlie XCX was, I mean, always. She was, oh, I thought her at Coachella. She was awesome. Yeah. So there's just so many different. We're not going to look at you anymore. Yeah, sorry. You name it. I mean, I just love hearing live music. Have you seen The Strokes? No. I just saw them for the first time, and I love The Strokes, and it was one of the best shows of my entire life. Really?

58:02Yeah. Wow. I don't know why. I think it's just because I've been waiting so long to see them, and there were so many. I had been to so many festivals where they were playing and I never got to see them. And then I finally was like, they were before Justin Bieber. So everyone was like, okay, we'll stand here and watch them. And it was just magic. That's amazing. And they sounded good. So good. Amazing. Okay, so these are the Tell Me What's Wrongs. Okay. I have a very stubborn family and we can't say anything to each other without someone getting mad. I'm on the receiving end of all of the blame usually.

58:31I always say that people only act like others around them. And my friends and I definitely don't have issues. What should I do? It's constant. Okay, so just to clarify. It's very complicated. The family blames them for everything. Yeah. Let's unpack it. I can't stand to let something go without understanding it. Let's leave that part out. That third sentence. No, but that third sentence is very revealing. She's saying like, you only act like those around you, so I must not be the problem if my friends and I don't have issues, but I have issues within my family. I see what you're saying. Okay, got it.

59:07Good. Thanks for that. I can't help because I don't have enough information, but I would suggest if it's something that's debilitating, when you come home you can't be free and there's a lot of pressure, if you can afford a therapist, grab a therapist. I would say talk from your feelings. Oh, my God. Didn't you just hear the family's very stubborn? They don't listen. I feel. You don't listen. I'm trying to I feel like every time I bring something up I get attacked I know it's always the I feel I feel I feel I feel it might not be exactly so you're saying step into the family dynamic using feeling words you have the right to get angry at me or blame me but I feel I literally hate my boyfriend's music This would totally be fine if we weren't dating because, of course, tastes are different and everything.

1:00:02But he always shows me his demos, plays live for me when he's working on something, et cetera. And I just sit through the whole thing. I'm struggling here, but I don't want to lie to him. I also don't want to crush his spirits. Oh, this is a very – because music fuels everything. And if you don't like the music, it's not going to ignite the fuel. Right. I mean, maybe the fuel gets ignited other ways in this because she didn't elaborate, but she's being very honest. I'm assuming it's a she, could be a he. It doesn't matter. That's unclear. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. This is a tricky one. Nicole?

1:00:40I feel what you are trying to say with your music is not something that resonates with me, but I hope it resonates with everyone else. You have to write to make any music you want, But I feel... But I feel... I don't know how to help on that one, because that's insulting. This will crush the person. Find something you like in it. Yeah. I have a compliment. Someone new, maybe. Give him a bone. Yeah. You can't give him the bone because it's not igniting the fire. Okay. I'm kind of in love with my best friend, and I have no idea what to do about it. Oh. Tricky. I genuinely can't tell if she feels the same because we're both women.

1:01:25So who the fuck can really tell the difference between two people in love and female friendships? Like it's gotten to the point where I just forget that we aren't actually together. So through text, propose something. Just go, you know what? It's a weird thing. I had a feeling for someone and it's a woman. And then see how the friend responds. You know, the friend is like, oh my God, that's so gross. I can't believe you're like a woman. Then you know to step out. If someone goes, oh my God, that's amazing. I had a feeling for a woman as well. What was it like? Toe dip and see if that's even something that they're open to.

1:01:59Perfect. Also, patience is a virtue. Yep. I don't have it, but it is a virtue. Yep. Like really and truly. I don't have a lot of it either. You don't? Patience is hard. Yeah. I have a little too much. I feel like you guys have the most patience. You work on film sets all the time. No, but when she says she doesn't have patience, she's got a lot of things to do, see, and explore. Like, she's like, I'm not going to, I'm going to go. She's really brave that way. Like, when you're on location, like, you just. No, I just, like, I'm curious. And I'm filled with wonder. Yeah. She's a diamond in the sky.

1:02:31No, I am. I love, like. You are Rihanna's song. It's like, honey. Like a diamond. Shush. Diamond in the sky. I'm just going to be the soundtrack to Nicole's life. I'm just going to be over here singing little vignettes for her. I'm just listening to all of this. Yeah, I'm sorry. What was it like on set with you guys? Not this. It was a hard shoot. It was a hard shoot. Listen, I've been telling you. It was hard. Rose-colored glasses. Oh, my God, I'm going to kill you. I will kill you live on this show. Your young Jonas pussy will come over here for my Squidward pussy. We're going to have him do some physical comedy.

1:03:14By the way, stop. recently I have been over sharing my business and other people's business a lot. Oh, it's not good. Not good. Stop. I don't understand why I don't think at all when I speak. And after my stomach drops, because I know I shouldn't have said that. Pause. Count to 30. Yeah. Walk out of the room. Try your best because you don't want to do that. You don't want someone doing that to you. Right. Be someone who's a safe person to share business with. And if someone's sharing business with you that, you know, you can't keep walk away. Just go. I can't. I'm not saying I'm not a safe person.

1:03:47person to give this information to right like i can't hear it i'll tell someone i know it's enticing it's really enticing someone goes i've got some tea like my daughter from camp i got so much tea and i'm like what is it and i don't know these kids so and then after a while i went i don't need to know yeah that business right i don't i don't yeah i really don't my friends last room i think we're quite good at this like you're fantastic yeah anything i love doing it yeah yeah i know this is we need to be like a therapist talk show like that you know come in like every like half a year. Yeah, you'll come in and we'll do this again.

1:04:17My friend slash roommate moved her boyfriend into her house without asking me. Oh no, not good. Obviously I got a lawyer to see if I could break my lease and now she's being horrible to me. She's acting like a seventh grader and sending me videos of them at the bar without me. Additionally, she's only been dating this guy for six months and he's a drug and gambling addict. Please prescribe. The plot thickens. I know what happened here. He spotted her. He wanted in on that. got into a living situation because he didn't have a great place to live because he spent all his money from gambling if he's an addict he's using the girlfriend to have a place to live he's now gaslighting and triangulating the three of them so that she turns on the roommate maybe this girlfriend will pay for the whole place i have a place to live the other one is out since she wants out on a lease or if they drive her out they go no harm no foul you broke your lease not our problem i actually like to think that's probably what happened yeah i'm telling you See, that's exactly what it is.

1:05:07That's exactly what it is. Yeah. And this poor girl is stuck in a really horrific, manipulative situation. Did you hear that question before? Or you just came up with it that quick? No, no. And sadly, sadly it just all came bubbling up. Yeah. This poor girl is in a really tricky situation. Out. Get out. Get out. But if the lease is in her name and if she breaks the lease, it's going to go on her credit history. It's not fair. So if her friend is listening, you get out. you go out yeah hey Jake an amazing guest so I have this friend who some days I would say is my best friend and recently she hung out with a few girls from our friend group and she dead ass spilled like really bad secrets of mine and it obviously pissed me off and the least this is Lila this is my daughter this is her this has gotta be her oh yeah sounds just like my daughter is Lila the one spilling the secrets or having the secrets spilled having the secrets spilled okay she's a secret spiller too oh yeah I can be that as well.

1:06:06I'm the least confrontational person you could ever meet, but I want to say something to her about it so bad, but I'm just so scared to help. You know what? This is where you just, it's what Nicole said. You say how you feel, say it really hurt me. Watch out because if this friend's willing to do that to you behind your back, you asking and being very responsible about your feelings, saying this hurt me, might result in nothing, but at least you tried and now you know who this person is and this person, if they don't accept you and hear you and make amends, they're going to do it to you again.

1:06:40But on the flip side of it, you could fuse a very strong friendship. If you actually get in there, confront, work through it, you could end up stronger and better together. Right, so you can go one way or another. But she's got to at least deal with it. What might be hard is that you'll stew on it otherwise. And you might not have those friends in the end. If they go, I don't care, you do it to me. Right. Well, then she'll learn what a narcissist is as well. Exactly. Yeah. Well, Nicole and Sandra. Oh, my God. This was serious therapy today. Two impacts here. Jesus. Tell us how you feel. I feel, I'm like, get out.

1:07:15Nicole's like, hold on. I honestly feel like really grateful that you guys took your time out of your busy schedule. You guys are like. Are you kidding? No, you're. I'm so thrilled. Thank you for having us. You're giving us a place to like share something that we really are crazy about. You know, you're giving us a place to be ourselves and to ask excellent questions. show your vulnerability you're a real person it makes it easy this is not an easy process you feel like you need to shower but this felt really nice it feels good thanks for having us on your couch this is where this is a safe paneled room not all dark paneled rooms are safe and everything stays within this room I just so like if I had an hour and a half to pick your brain there's always alcohol in a hot tub involved right Always.

1:08:03Always. Nicole, it is dangerous and fulfilling and educational and... Got a new viewer. I think you would love Housewives. I started with the original Atlanta Housewives. Okay, Atlanta. I started with the original. They're the best of the best, yes. But Salt Lake City. That's what I hear. The Mormon? The Mormons. Oh, I'm there with you. I hear the Salt Lake City. I'm there for the drama now with the serious drama when they had to shut down and all that. It's, it's, they, somebody, like, gets arrested by the FBI on camera. On camera. Bravo cameras are up, and somebody gets arrested by Homeland Security on camera.

1:08:41Is this recent? Wait, are they back up again? No, they're, they're, this person just got out of jail. Her name is Jen Shaw. And she would always say, um, it's Shaw-mazing. And then she got arrested by Homeland Security. Okay. I have no idea what you're talking about. Oh, wait a minute. This isn't the Mormon Wives one. No, no, no. This is Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Got it. Okay. And it is some of the best television. Is the hair as good on that one as it is on The Mormon? I don't watch the other one. Why? Because I'm so loyal to my Salt Lake Housewives. There's no loyalty. How many real Housewives are there in terms of?

1:09:15How many franchises? There's Atlanta. There's Beverly Hills. OC? There's OC. There's New York. There's Salt Lake City. There's Rhode Island, which is fantastic. Is it good? That's what I hear. There is Miami. There is Potomac. We should do like a book club where we watch all the housewives. We Zoom. I'd like the book club. It's a genius character study. Like, it's really amazing. These women are like, they bear it all. Yeah, no, for acting, it's amazing. Early Beverly Hills is some of. That's what I hear. It's priceless. It's priceless. Yeah, because they set the tone. Yeah. They're in New York.

1:09:47Yeah. Atlanta, Beverly Hills, New York. They are the dark triad in the most brilliant way. Yeah. Who thought it up? Was it Ryan Seacrest? Andy Cohen. Did he? Orange County was the first one. And then it just kind of, I think New Jersey is actually what took it off when Teresa flipped the table. Yes. Yeah. That was so good. And Scary Island in New York when they all show up to the island and Kelly Ben Simone has a psychotic break. Yeah. I have no idea what you're talking about, but I'm nodding as though I do. You have to go on vacation together when there's discord to some rental house that's fabulous and put them all together with alcohol and it's epic.

1:10:23It's genuinely epic. Yeah. I've watched the Beverly Hills one. Oh, it's so good. Just the last season. Oh, just the last one? Yeah. Actually, Faith and I watched a tiny bit of it. Because of the leather, I've noticed I'm on you. Like, I've just started sliding down. You shouldn't do an interview with Leather with Leather. Make a note for that for a future guest. Don't wear leather. Because I'm, like, literally, like, hey, Nicole. She wants to be held when she goes home. Here I am. You're so mean. No, I can't. That was decades ago. Oh, you are fine. I still would like to be home when I come. You have children.

1:11:00I do the two-minute hug every day. Oh, my God. I'm literally on you at this point. Yes. Yes. Anything else you'd like to ask is. Thank you for being here. Do we get swag? I was going to offer it. I didn't think you wanted. Oh, my God. Yes. Yes, of course. I want a hoodie. I'll give you a hoodie. I'll give you a hoodie. I'll give you a hoodie. Anything you want. You can take the whole rack. Okay. Wow. Wow. Speaking of rack, I'm crushing you right now. Just my boob. That's the rack I was talking about. That was the segway. Bye, pussies. Bye, pussies. Don't be one. No, be one.