Session 98: Kaia Gerber

25:14Oh, thank you. And swallowing it. Okay. That's what I think. I want to wax it so bad just to see what it's like. But also like. I think you're going to feel really naked. Do guys, do actors like wax themselves for TVs and movies though? Yes. Right. You're asking me because I've dated a lot of actors. No, I'm asking you because you're an actress. Well, it's different. I'm sure for, I think it depends what the role requires. I wouldn't shave my legs for a roll I mean I shave my legs for myself sometimes if I'm feeling like it you know what I love is an everything shower do you know what that is?

25:47I do but I never do it because well actually I've started skincare recently I've never washed my face before you have perfect skin it's always the people that don't wash their faces so I never wash my face but I started using Rode I really fuck with it I saw you post a picture You're wearing road and your skin was glowing. Yeah. Look at it right now. Are you wearing it right now? The glazing milk. Okay. And I use the face wash, the glazing milk, and then I do the spray. The pineapple face wash. Yes. I use that too. It takes your makeup off really well. It's really. I pointed at you and said your makeup.

26:19No, but no, you know what? I would use it though. No, I use. Chopper row and drag. Yes. No, well, nothing took that makeup off. I showed up to Seth the next day for Kraft mac and cheese and there was like black eyeliner under my eye and I was like, yeah, this is what you guys are getting and I'm really sorry about it. Sometimes your life is so funny. It's so insane. It's so, yeah. Like, well, you saw what I texted you today? About, oh, about. Somebody texted me. Oh my God. Oh yeah. Somebody texted me. I will not name this person, but like they texted me happy birthday. And I said, oh my God, blank.

26:57I miss you, but it's not my birthday. And they said, oh, so when's your birthday? And I said, October 27th. why and they said because usually the people that say they miss me I would know their birthday who is this and I said um this is Jake and they said oh shit long number you're not Kiki Palmer what it's so funny it was actually that's a real conversation I had today but that's like normal for you and I was like damn it was one of the funnier things that had happened to me in the I got a really lovely happy birthday text a month ago and it was not my birthday, but it was so nice. And it said, happy birthday, Kaya.

27:39They didn't think I was Kiki Palmer. They said, happy birthday, Kaya. And like all these amazing, lovely things. And I literally just said, thank you so much. Oh, you didn't tell them? No. Maybe I shouldn't have told them. Well, no, because then maybe like that person actually now can reach out to Kiki Palmer because maybe it is her birthday. Is it Kiki Palmer's birthday? I think she's a Virgo. It is Kiki Palmer's birthday. Happy birthday, Kiki. Happy birthday, Kiki Palmer. Wow. Yeah, no, that was crazy. That is so funny. But also, like, Kiki Palmer deserves more than just a happy birthday. No, no exclamation point.

28:16There was nothing. It was just happy birthday. You know, when you say congrats or congratulations, it automatically sends confetti. Yeah, I love it. And also, how do you turn the thing off of Zoom where it celebrates for you? What? You know where if you do a certain hand gesture. And it gives you the thumbs up. I was on a Zoom where someone was telling me a really personal sad story. Oh, Jesus Christ. And it was a director. And it was really like lovely that they were opening up in that way. And I was listening really intently. And I think I just went like this or something. And Balloon started.

28:53No, no, no, no. It was the laser show. And it got dark all around me and then it was rave lasers and I literally was like, I'm so sorry. Did they laugh? No, they were like, it's okay. Oh, okay. Like, got it. I was like, this is the worst thing that could have happened right now and I'm so sorry. It was terrible. I don't know. I don't think you can turn that off. I mean, you should be able to because it's really inappropriate sometimes when it happens. It was the worst. It was horrible. I didn't get that job, obviously, so.

29:24I don't know how you actors do it. Well, you do because you're auditioning now. I am, and it really hurts every time. It doesn't stop hurting. But you give the best advice about it. You're like, it's not meant for you. I give the advice that I wish I listened to. When it comes to me, there's no consoling me. Right. But it does make me feel slightly better. Like, all the rejection is worth it when I can actually give you advice on it. but I do believe that like either a role was always yours or never yours. That's true. Do you like, do you think that like it hurts more when you're closer to it and you don't get it?

29:58A hundred percent. Okay. When you do a self tape and don't hear anything back, you're like, well, yeah, you know, who cares? Right. When they're like, they're really interested, do another one. You're, you start to get excited. Even if it's a project that you weren't excited about before, suddenly you start caring about things that you didn't actually care about. Right. And then they're like, and we actually sold it we sell more of you and we don't like it then you're like oh okay it hurts it hurts I don't know if I'm very good at auditioning um but I think you're also the kind of actor that like you're just gonna get roles because you're so right for it well I don't think I can do something that's not doesn't check out with like my I don't think people would buy it like what like I don't think I could remember the other day I tried to play straight and I you were like just do it I was like I don't think anyone's gonna buy this I didn't get it so I mean, people say that I can't play straight either.

30:49What? Yeah, that was my big feedback when I did Bottoms, as they were like, my one note is that we don't believe that Kaya's straight. I mean, I didn't think my character was straight. She was written straight, but I definitely was not believing it. Was Bottoms the first acting thing you ever did? No, I did American Horror Story, Ryan Murphy. I forgot about that. And was that, was it, were you like, did you grow up watching American Horror Story? Yes, I watched every season. Which is your favorite? it okay I have two okay I love I love the first season it's like near and dear and also the twins in the beginning Bodhi and Kai I went to school with them so that was huge in my town it was like Bodhi and Kai have hit it big they're an American Horror Story then I love Colt which is I know weird wait when Evan Peters has blue hair did I watch Colt I watched Coven no I didn't watch Colt I watched Coven especially now in today's climate it's actually so good you should watch Colt it's really scary because it's like super realistic.

31:46What's it about? It's about like a political campaign and a cult. Oh yes I never saw this. You should. Evan Peters is so good in it. Okay I need to watch it. And I was freaking out because I'm like the biggest American Horror Story fan and they kind of pitched the character that I was playing to me like I mean they didn't pitch it to me. I auditioned and I wanted. But then they explained the character. But then when they explained the character they were like it's kind of like the modern like Tate who was Evan Peters in season one and I was like, don't do this to me. And I got to wear the same shirt that says normal people scare me.

32:16And I freaked out. My performance didn't hit the same as Evan Peters' performance. Well, don't say that. It didn't and that's okay. We learn and we grow. But I loved doing that show and I'm such a fan. And then I also loved Freak Show. Did you watch that one? That was the circus one, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did actually watch. I watched some of that one. Where Sarah Paulson plays the conjoined twins. Yes, yes. Perfect. You've seen Coven, right? Yes. That was like my - That was your favorite. That was my big one. I love that show so much. It's just exceptional. It's exceptional. And now you get to work with him again.

32:48And now I get to work with him again. It's very exciting. Yeah, I love him. And the premise of the - So I keep interrupting you. Have you noticed that? I don't think that you're interrupting me. I think we're having a normal conversation. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. So what is the concept of the Shards? It takes place in the 80s and there is a murder and you go to Beverly Hills High? Yes. No, that's not correct. but it was um the the premise of the shards it's kind of auto fiction do you know what that is okay so auto fiction auto fiction is uh it's like autobiography slash fiction so it's like when people kind of next time i read context clues yeah it's okay when it's like a retelling of someone's life with fiction got it so it's brett easton ellis's life story or in high school when And he was around the time he was writing Less Than Zero.

33:38But it's obviously heightened and kind of imagined. But the names are real people that he went to high school with. He went to Buckley. So it's sort of based in truth. And it's about a group of wealthy kids who go to Buckley High. And there starts being murders and people start going missing. And the main character, Brett, sort of is trying to figure out who did it. He thinks it's this new kid at school, Robert Mallory. And then kind of how chaos ensues within the friend group and the city of Los Angeles. Not to be so toxic, because I know that there's murder. But how interesting would your high school have been if there was a murder mystery and you were solving it within your friend group?

34:25So interesting. That sounds fascinating. Not that I wish that upon anyone, but I think that's kind of why. I don't know if there was actually a murder at Buckley in the 80s. But I think that's kind of Brett was like, let me retell my high school experience in a little more of like an interesting and creepy way. And it's scary. The book is really scary. Oh, that's my type of book. OK, you know what? I'm going to start it tonight. It's scary. After the dinner that I'm making you go to with me. You're not making me. I'm excited. Really? I make you come out all the time with me. Yeah, but I have fun.

34:55All of our best friends moved to New York. So we sort of ended up together accidentally, but I'm grateful and it was a good pairing. It's the best pairing. We met at Travis's wig party, who is now also in New York. Yeah. Well, he's here right now. Oh, he is here right now. Didn't you see him this weekend? I did. Oh, I love Travis. You love Travis. My king. I went to school with Travis. Oh, you. We met in middle school. How'd you guys meet? Like class? He was friends with this boy named Chris, and they invited me. I was friends with the cool girls, but I was not cool at all. And he invited us to Chris's house, and we hung out.

35:32And then I remember on the first week, or it was maybe homecoming of sixth grade, he Snapchat messaged me, are you coming to the game tonight? To which I responded, why? Because. Do you think he was asking you on a date? No, I just thought that they were trying to play a prank on me because boys didn't invite me places. So I was very sort of suspicious of the invite or of the ask. And I was like, why? What are you going to do to me there? And now he's my best friend. Well, you and him are my best friends for life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He knows where all the bodies are buried. Friends, like, those are scary, but great.

36:07He could ruin my life. Right? That's what I think about some of my best friends. He knows exactly where it would hurt the most. I mean, truly, but he doesn't, thankfully. That's my Alice. Is that your Alice? Yeah, Alice knows all. Who's your longest friend? Probably my, she, I used to have her babysit me because she was so cool. She was a senior when I was in seventh grade, but, like, I just wanted to hang out with her, but she would only hang out with me when I would, she would babysit me. Imani, but we talk every day now. Oh. She has known me since I was 12. Okay. That's probably my longest time.

36:35Are you the same person that you were at 12? I can feel that from you. The same exact person. I'm so glad. I see videos of you when you're younger and I'm like, you literally haven't changed at all in the best way. You know what? There's a lot of things I'll critique about myself. I am the same person and I appreciate that I've stayed true to myself. You 100 % have and then people just caught on to you. I feel this way about like Charlie XCX. I'm comparing you and Charlie XCX. Right. Because Charlie always just stayed true to herself. And then finally people caught up to her. But she was way ahead of everyone.

37:08Did you listen to her? What's your favorite album by her? I mean, I loved, obviously, I love it and all the early Charlie. Yeah, prop bangers. But I think the most recent really grabbed me in a way that I wasn't expecting. But I've always loved her so much. And I think like it just took people a second to catch up to her. And I think like your success has been people just catching on to you rather than like you adjusting for people. I really try to remind myself of that all the time. I'm really, every time I feel myself adjusting, I'm like, I can't do this. But it's hard because a lot of your videos are based off of comments, right?

37:45Yeah. So do you have to read the comments? Yeah. And like, even if I didn't, I would anyway. Do you read comments? I don't let people comment on my Instagram. Got it. Was that always the case? No, I'm just too sensitive. Yeah. I did for a long time and then I stopped. My therapist was like, stop. And so I did stop. But it's so, it's too tempting. Like not because I think I'm better than anyone. I'm actually very weak and I would read all of them if they were there. So I just don't, I don't, I can't let it happen. Have you ever let like one comment ruin your entire day? Of course. Yeah. Especially when they point out an insecurity you hadn't thought of before.

38:25Mine is like you can call, you can say I'm ugly. You can say whatever you want when they like critique my character. But how do they know your character? They don't, but they'll critique it anyway. And like that's what hurts the most. Yeah, yes. Where they're like this guy seems like a bad guy. That's insane. That's like what kills me. But like that because I have such bad OCD and I know this sounds stupid, but one of like my OCDs is that like and I thought I didn't know this until I saw it on TikTok. talk somebody was like no it's a symptom of ocd is thinking you're a bad person all the time or like thinking like you're gonna you you are not like just thinking you're a bad person like thinking your intentions are bad is like a symptom of ocd oh thinking that you did something intentionally yeah and so like that is i've always had that and so when i read that it like really it like really upsets me yeah i'm i truly i'm like the friend that the next morning has to hear that they're not mad that the people that were with me the night before were not mad at me yeah I think everyone's mad at me all the time all the time I've never thought you were mad at me or no I've never I've never heard of anyone ever being mad at you they have been it's happened the worst is when you think someone's mad at you and they are because you're like fuck I was right what else have I been right about literally then you go probably the 400 other people that I think are mad at me I don't even know 400 people and I assume that at any given moment 400 people are mad at me.

39:55Right. It's the worst. I mean I have friends who will just text me once a day not mad at you. Because they know that I probably think that they are. It's a really nice thing to do for the people that you care about. I'll do it to you. Can you? But you never think I'm mad at you and I honestly would never get mad at you. But I don't know maybe can you start doing it? Yeah I'll do it. I feel like Louis like takes care of you so well. Like you know what I mean? like he would be the type to text you not mad at you oh yeah you know what i mean it is so nice i mean one especially in portland i felt like he was all of our boyfriend yeah he was my boyfriend he was the group's boyfriend yeah he loves you and will so much he's my everything like i really feel like a lot of the appeal to me was you guys like he was like your friends are amazing and i was like it's a shock that they want to hang out with me um but i'm definitely a lot is being healed in this relationship i can feel it by the way he is like you guys are like healthy i'm gonna cry no it's true we didn't mean it thanks it's true it is i i really feel like if you have the opportunity to date a friend do it because like it just is so much better yeah like i never want to fight with my friends i never want to be mad at my friends i respect my friends it just is like a whole other thing.

41:14And I think sometimes you forget that you like someone when you love them. So I've never heard someone explain it that way. So it's like, you don't want to fight with your friends, but when you view someone as like just a boyfriend or just a partner, you're like, I could like, I'll fight with you. Like, I truly feel like sometimes in relationships, and I know you've never been in one, but you will learn this. Um, you get to a place where it's almost impossible to understand how love can get you there like you're like how can we get brought here by love right and like what like how how is this love like how is love the thing that carried us to this point of like hurt and pain and anger and all and resentment and all those things when like love is supposed to be a really beautiful thing um so I really think like if you can date your friends you should or date someone that you would be friends with anyways right don't date someone just because you're like sexually attracted to them and uh are in lust with them you should sleep with those people right for sure right but you don't need to make them your partners

42:18thank you c geek for sponsoring tonight's episode um my code has changed because the other one got leaked to people that do not watch this podcast it is now just therapists for 10 off your c geek order. And with that being said, let me tell you why you should use it. There are so many concerts happening right now. There's Lorde on the Ultrasound tour. There's Renee on the Bite Me tour. There's Megan Maroney on the MIOK tour. She only has eight shows left. I'm about to personally see it myself this Thursday in LA. I cannot wait. But there are just so many people on tour. Oh, Tate, Miss Possessive World Tour.

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43:57Oh, also I'm taking the 11 PM on the third. So you can come to dinner 730. Great. I'll be there. Can I bring my luggage? Of course. Do you care? Not at all. Why would I care? Cool. I'm so happy you'll be there. I'll be there. I need my best friend there. And I need to go to my best friend's birthday. It sounds good, doesn't it? It feels good. It feels so good. Yeah, I can go and I'll leave at nine or I'll leave at like 830, but I'll go. But you'll come. Yeah. Maybe I'll come to your house before. That's cute. Let's do that yeah okay gorgeous thank god i'm so excited are you so excited for life of a show girl like you already know like it's gonna change we were at dinner when the announcement happened and you had to excuse yourself i said everybody well first of all i told everybody i said i'm just letting everyone know i think it was 9 p.m i am gonna have to leave dinner no it was it was 9 12 for us it was i'm gonna have to leave dinner for five minutes to experience this it was also It was so funny because it was a group of boys only who didn't understand the gravity and what it meant to you.

44:58Right. And so you had to excuse yourself and they were all kind of like, what's going on? Do you remember? And then do you remember I was guessing what it was going to be before? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were so wrong. I was so off. What was the name that you guessed? It was like Cosmic. Cosmic Love. Love. Cosmic Burn. Because I was like, it's orange. It's like, it's red. It's orange. It's cosmic. It's life of a showgirl. But you're so excited. I was off. And are you happy about the engagement? I threw up. I almost threw up. Like I, it's just because she's been singing about wanting this for so long.

45:31So like seeing it come to fruition is so awesome. You can find love. You can find love. Yeah, it doesn't matter how long it takes. So much heartbreak and you can still find love. It's so true. And I think she's the champion of that. She is. It's like you can date as many people as you want. You can make as many mistakes as you want. and like eventually you're going to find that person. It doesn't matter how long it takes. Also, like the way that their love story played out, I thought was really sweet. He literally just like shot his shot on his podcast. Said, I made her a friendship bracelet. She didn't get it.

46:02And then that's how they started. Do you not know that? No. That's how they started Day-Date. Wait, what did he do? He went on his podcast, if I'm remembering correctly, and was like, I made Taylor Swift a friendship bracelet because she performed at, I think it was Arrowhead Stadium. Wherever he plays, he went. He was like, I made a friendship bracelet. Which was part of the whole friendship bracelet culture. And I didn't get to give it to her. And so I remember seeing like the news, like Travis Kelsey says like he didn't get to give to her. And she heard. Yeah, they're engaged now. They're engaged.

46:31So never say never. So shoot your shot. Have you ever slid into someone's DMs? Yeah. And honestly, it's never worked out in my favor. So I've stopped. I do think like, and you're on dating apps too, right? I should be. Just how do you know if you don't know their personality? That's what I think. Well, that's why this guy I'm going on a date with in New York, I didn't go on a date with him, but then I ran into him somewhere. Oh. And we, like, I felt we vibed. Right. It's really hard to tell. Like, sometimes you see someone and you're like, no, not for me. And then you meet them and you're like, whoa.

47:03For me. For me. Right. Please. Well, that's the issue with dating apps, I think, is that it's sometimes hard to, like, just look at someone and be like, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no. What's your worst date story? Date story. Probably the time I went on the date and. Was this Denim on Denim? Yeah, and he told me it's not a date because I was just so embarrassed. Okay, but I don't think that's your fault. But I was embarrassed. Like, I was really embarrassed. This is what makes me very sad is, like, when something like that happens, we get embarrassed even though the other person should be embarrassed.

47:37Right. Like, yeah, I've been stood up and I was so embarrassed. You've been stood up? No way! Wait, what? But it was an accident. Okay. It was an accident. He fell asleep. Okay. But I was like sitting at a bar waiting, waiting. And I was like, this is the most embarrassing thing. I'll never recover from this. Right. And then I was like, why am I embarrassed? But it's like it happens. I feel this way also like when people get cheated on and like you feel embarrassed. And it's like, but why are you embarrassed? The other people should be embarrassed. That's so true. I feel like it's just like a pride thing maybe.

48:13Yeah. Or you're like, how did I not catch on to that? but honestly no it's the other person's fault and it is the the denim on denim boy that was his fault but at the time I was like did I misread things and I don't think I did no no no no no I really don't think I did I mean didn't you meet on a dating app no we met at an after party but it was flirty like I know you're not crazy also you're not someone who thinks that everyone's no I never think people are flirting with yeah I don't think that ever no you know like I'm actually the polar opposite of it and I have to have someone be like no I think I like you yeah I like you.

48:44Yeah. So for me to like think this, like. No, there had to have been signs. Some vibes, some signs. There had to have been signs. One time the first date I ever went on, we went on a second date and he was 40 minutes late. That sucked. But he showed up. He showed up, but he was 40 minutes late and I was like, this just isn't it for me. Yeah, that's also first date. You should be on best behavior. So if it's already not going well, then like it's only going to get worse. But I'm excited to go. I like dating in New York a lot more than I like dating in LA. Well, I think maybe you have more. There's more gay people, maybe.

49:17Yeah, more gay people in New York. No, I think that it's just in L.A. You tend to only date people who have the same job as you look at me. It's better. It's nice to be like there's more options in New York that you're around people who do all different kinds of things. Did you like living in New York when you lived in New York? I loved it. I loved it. I came back when the pandemic happened. That's when you came back. Yeah, I would have honestly stayed. And then I've just been working here, which is really nice. and like I'm from here, but I would like to go back, I think. But I would never leave you here.

49:47Okay, cool. I would never do that. And you can't leave me here. No, I'm not leaving you here because I was about to say, LA's about to have a moment. I know. Because it's stock is low right now. And the best time to invest is when someone's stock is low. Okay. It's true. Investor. No, because like I was talking about investments the other day and they were like, the stock market's so bad, but they were like, no, but that's the best time to invest. You buy when it's low. And then, and then. And LA, I just have this gut feeling that like we're about to get this like resurgence of like real like pre-pandemic LA.

50:21I hope so. I feel it. I am enjoying it here right now. I like it. I am loving it here. It is really nice. I'm having fun nights. Yeah. I drove around. People are out on the street. Right? I mean, well, that one wine bar we go to, it stayed open until 3 something a.m. the other day. I know. It's so fun. And people are like smoking cigarettes out on the street, which I don't condone. but it just feels like not LA. At all. This can be in LA too. It felt like New York. Yeah, I know. It felt like New York. I see good vibes for it, hopefully. I hope so because you and I are holding it down here. We are holding it.

50:52While everyone leaves. Down. And Will and Charlie. I don't think Will and Charlie are going to leave. I don't think so either. Do you think Travis will ever come back? God, I hope so. I think so. I got to find him a husband here so he comes back quick. I know. I know. Do you and Travis ever make like a marriage pact? pact we we don't have a marriage pact but I do see like a domestic partnership where we raise our children in the same at least vicinity of each other right um I I hope I have a child that's exactly like Travis oh like I truly believe that if I have a son that is exactly like Travis I will be the happiest woman on earth you need a gay son I need a gay you are like meant to have a gay son I'll do everything in my power to make sure I have a gay son.

51:39You are meant to have a gay son. That's what I say about Louise. I want it so bad. Of course, I'll love my child no matter what their sexual preference is, but I would be very happy with a gay son. I think that's a really big green flag. I always say that. One thing I will say about my relationship with Travis, I don't know if you have this with Will or Charlie, is I'm like some of the people I've dated have gotten off so easy because most of the things that I would require from a partner, Travis does. like he picks me up from the airport got it he's like taking me to doctor's appointments he's the first person I call with like good or bad news so I'm like I kind of have had I rely on him for more things than my partners usually right but now that he's in New York we're being forced to have some independence which is really hard but I think good for us was it sad when he left um it kind of like just happened I that well he because that's what I I felt like, too, it wasn't like when Julia and Peyton left, it was a big to-do.

52:34Like, we were crying. Like, I ran after their car. Like, it was. Yes. Wait, did you actually cry? Yeah, I cried. Was that the first time in a while? In a really long time. I was so sad. Did it feel good and cathartic? Well, I wasn't, like, sobbing, but I was, like, tears were falling. That's great. It felt great. I love crying so much. I was just sad, like, because I've lived with Julia for four years or three years. That's a big change. So I was like, when you live with someone and they move, it's like, oh my God, what the fuck is happening? No. But you also travel so much. Yeah, I go to New York all the time.

53:05I also see him all the time. We've done like long stints apart. It's okay. But it was, it was kind of like happened during a very busy time. And then I was in LA with a week of nothing to do. And I was like, oh, he's not here. I have no other relationships outside of this. But now I have you. Best friends. Best friends. Best friends. Which I think would have happened regardless of Travis State or not. I don't want you to think that you're like the replacement. No, and I don't want you to think you're. It's okay if I am. No, but it's okay if I am. Those are big shoes to fill. That's how I feel about Travis.

53:37We can have all of them in our lives. Exactly. And that's the beautiful thing. Do you want to get into the tell me what's wrongs? Yeah. Are we supposed to do therapists? Oh my God. Sometimes I forget Kaya listens to therapists. No, no, no. You don't understand. Jake, I have listened to every episode at least twice. It's crazy that you, because she'll know, she just said Nolan. And I was like, wait, how do you know that? Also was shocked by that. Really? Yeah. Nolan, I wouldn't forget you after the whole debacle with the last. Oh, I forgot. I'm nemesis number one. I would never forget an enemy.

54:07No, actually, he's my hero. So what are you therapist about? I watched Barbarian the other night and I had never seen it. Have you seen it? So good. I'm therapist that more people aren't talking about Justin Long and Barbarian. I love Justin Long. That is the performance of a lifetime. Did you see his cameo in Weapons? Of course. But it didn't mean as much to me because I hadn't seen Barbarian yet. He's amazing. He's so funny. He's so funny and he seems like such a nice guy. So when he plays such an asshole and plays it off well, it's crazy. I know. It's that much more impressive. And when he's down in the basement with the tape measure getting the square footage.

54:41Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was crying laughing. He's so funny. So that's what I'm a therapist about. That he didn't get enough credit for Barbarian. No, like the candles should always stay lit for Justin Long. That's how I feel. What else is he in? Was he in like some 2000s rom-coms? I think so. Is that where I'm like remembering him from? He was in New Girl. What is it? He was not in New Girl. Yes, he was. Yes, he is. Wait, who is he in New Girl? Genslinger? Oh, he's the other teacher. Yeah, he's the other teacher. He's like the nerdy teacher on the turkey day. There's like a Thanksgiving episode and don't they find a dead body?

55:13Yes. I've never seen New Girl. I've seen like two episodes. I know. I know. I know. You have to watch it. Have you ever seen Search Party? No, that's Cole. Isn't Cole Escola in that? I need to watch. It is the funniest show I've ever seen. Who else is in Search Party? You don't know. It's okay. I don't know, but a really great group of people. I need to watch it. Search Party, have you seen the other two? Yes. You actually told me to watch that. I love the other two. So funny. What are you therapist about? What am I therapist about? A hush pose. Maybe that I don't know what we're getting for dinner yet.

55:47I think we should go to Santo. I want to go to Santo. I think that's what we should do. I want to go to Santo. Let's do that. but I don't want to force Lewis to do something that he doesn't want to do. You won't be. But one time I had sushi from, because one time we were at Seco and they made me sushi at Santo. Do you remember that? You worked the room until you got exactly what you wanted and I was so impressed. I came back to the table with a plate of sushi and it was really good, which is why I wanted it. You had like eight pieces of sushi and I was like, okay, at midnight. Are you a hillstone girl?

56:18No. Okay, so I notoriously used to hate it and I've fallen in love with it. What do you get there? Salmon Nagiri. It's the best salmon Nagiri in Los Angeles. At Hillstone? Yep. Really? Yep. You would be shocked. Okay. Will you take me? Yes, I will take you. Okay, so should we? I can't believe you remember Therapist. No one ever remembers that. Not even Julia or them. When I tell you, I don't like being in silence because I don't want the thoughts to start creeping in. And so I just listen to Therapist over and over again. And when you released two episodes last week, I was like, yes. Did you listen to Will's?

56:49Of course. How good was Will? You were unwell. I've never seen you like that. I had like, I've never been so hungover. And I. What did you do? Was that the night after? Wait, when did you record that? It was the. Was it after we went out and then you went out after we went? No. Yep. It was that night. It was that night. Yeah. That's that night. That's brave to do an episode the next day. It was that night. Yeah. And yeah, I was terrified. I woke up terrified. That's the worst feeling. I haven't had a drink in three weeks and I have to say my anxiety is better. and my sleep is better. I'm not drinking this week.

57:24Okay. And I feel great. Neither am I. And I feel great. Isn't your sleep better? Yes. I just was like, oh, everyone wakes up with crippling anxiety and then I was like, no, no, that's alcohol. Actually turns out. I do miss weed though. I've been thinking about it a lot. I was quite the stoner and I just - You gave up. I gave up. It didn't, it never agreed with me but I just thought it will eventually start agreeing with me. Right, right. It only got worse. I think that's how I felt too. Right, like you can like convince your body that it likes it eventually but it made me creative at points which i needed okay but i think that was creative in a way where you revisited it and you were like that's a terrible idea well i don't know because when tucker came on he was telling me like that's what i used to tell myself and it's not true he's like i used to tell myself that it made me more creative that it made me this that and third and like it just wasn't true wait you know what else i'm therapist about what when you brought up tucker you were the original sally girl and no one talks about it.

58:21You were the original Sally girl. And like Natalie Portman was so cute as Sally. I watched that video so many times. Yeah, she was great. She was amazing. But you were the number one Sally girl. Tucker likes to forget. Don't, I'm not letting anyone forget. Tucker likes to forget. He ranked his favorite Sally's the other day. Stop, were you in there? No. Wait, what was the ranking? I forget. What was the ranking? I forget, but I wasn't in there. And I was like, oh, he's, he's just, it's a joke. It must be. He is very funny. He's hysterical. He is funny. He's hysterical. But I think about the fact that you were the original Sally girl.

58:53Thank you. You started a big trend. Thank you. You know what? I think about it. Natalie Portman is following in your footsteps. I think about it a lot too. I'd be lying if I said I didn't. And I do think about it all the time. I would think about it all the time. I was like, damn. Like, I did that. Where was the concert? Where were you on stage? It was in Dallas. And it was right after my show in Dallas. And I went to go see him. And he wanted to. He has a song called Slut Interlude. and he wanted to bring me on and dance around me like one less lonely girl. And so I was like, oh, that sounds great.

59:22Yeah. But then he was like, no, actually, come on for Sally and, like, jump around. And I was like, ooh, that feels anxiety-inducing. So that's why I was on for so short because I went on and I was like, oh, I can't do this anymore. And I jumped off because it was scary. No one had done it before. I haven't been asked yet, so. You haven't? No. You would make a great Sally. Thank you. I think so, too. The offer hasn't come in yet, but it'll come eventually. It'll come. He's done with tour. It's never happening again, by the way. No, he's going on tour again. What if we were Sally's together? Don't play with me.

59:51Should we? Yes. Should we see if he's coming here at any time soon? Wearing nothing but Lolas. Yes, just coming on our Lolas, jumping around to Sally. Naked with a Lola. It's low-key really scary. At least for me it was. But now I don't know if it is because people know what to do. Let's get into the Tell Me What Songs. So my boyfriend is leaving for college nine hours away, and we are staying together and doing long distance. When I was saying goodbye and helping him pack up, I found a pack of, I found a box of condoms in his bag. I'm not going with him. We've been together for a year and have done long distance before.

1:00:19Should I kill him or tread lightly? Okay. Should I take it? I mean, you know, unfortunately, unfortunately, I think I should take this one. I think I'm in a first play devil's advocate and then I'm going to decimate his character. Okay. So I think there's a world where he was bringing them with him so that when she comes to visit, he has condoms unless they don't use a condom and in that case run right what I will say is if there is any suspicion of cheating leave go like that's enough there's this there's this like wonderful column called dear sugar and uh when I was in a similar situation my friend showed me this advice column and there's this thing there's this like kind of poem that she wrote where she's like go because you want to because wanting to leave is enough one more time i thought you were so moved by it that you had to take a moment of silence i picked up on it for a second and then okay go because you want to she's like go even though you love him go even though he's your best friend and you're his and then the end is go because you want to because wanting to leave is enough like i don't think i think that's enough proof for this person right like if you feel it your instinct is usually right.

1:01:38Like, don't second guess your intuition. So leave. Leave. I mean, yeah. If he's bringing a pack of condoms and you're nine hours away. There's no reason for him to have that. You know what I prescribe? What? The other woman. Ah! It's a great movie. I love you so much. I love you! You know that's my favorite prescription to give. Really? Yes! Leslie Mann should have gotten an Oscar for that movie. Yeah, Nicki Minaj too. Nicki Minaj too. Put Nicki Minaj in more movies, honestly. She killed it. She's a LaGuardia kid. Is she? Yeah, she went to LaGuardia. All the greats go to LaGuardia. Nicki Minaj went to LaGuardia?

1:02:16Yes. Who else went to LaGuardia? Sombra went to LaGuardia. Azealia Banks went to LaGuardia. Wait, this is an insane roster. Who else? Timothee Chalamet went to LaGuardia. Right? Did I make that up? I think I might have made that up. No, I didn't make that up. No, I think he... No, he went to LaGuardia. Did he? He went to LaGuardia. I'll fact check. Give me - Will you get me a list of people that went to LaGuardia? Because it is extensive. But you didn't - Where did you go? You went to school in the city. I went to school in the city. I went to the school called Calhoun. Calhoun? And it was like, we had no walls.

1:02:45It sounds like an improv troupe. I think it was an improv school. Like it felt like everyone was improv-ing? No, it felt like the school - Like they didn't really know what they were doing. No, yes. Okay, great. Did you call your teachers by their first names? Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Timothy Chalamet did go to LaGuardia. Ah! Michael Shea, Zazie Beetz, Awkwafina, Jennifer Aniston. Ooh. Lots of people. Ansel Elgort. Oh. Omar Epps. I don't know. I don't know. Al Pacino. Oh, wow. Wow. I was just diagnosed with OCD. You know what I would prescribe actually? Leave Get Out by JoJo. Yep. Yep.

1:03:22I was just diagnosed with OCD at the age of 37. Seven, it feels so strange that many of my patterns and behaviors had had a connection for the entirety of my life so far. Nothing's terribly wrong, but I just feel strange with this new information. What tips or tricks do you have post-diagnosis of something like this? You're diagnosed with OCD? Yes. I knew, though, since I was seven. Yeah, I've never been diagnosed, but I exhibit all the behaviors. Right. Yeah. I think, if anything, it should give you some peace that you're like, okay, that makes sense. maybe this person feels like frustrated that they didn't catch it sooner but like yeah but I think it's hard to catch a mental illness yeah take the information and like at least now you have context for it yeah and there's things to help you I'm restarting exposure therapy soon what do you do in exposure therapy so like I have a hard time I used to have a hard time adding songs to a playlist why sounds really silly but I used to have to add it four times add it delete it yeah yeah and so like for example during exposure therapy they would just have me at it and i'd have to sit there in the uncomfortability and like have it be added which sounds so stupid no it doesn't it was really hard because i was like now i just knock on wood but it i feel like if i talk about it it's gonna come back but it's fine honestly or am i gonna give it to you i that's what i'm scared about i just used to have to say something if i thought a bad thought but then saying it once wasn't enough so i had to do it three times and then i had to do it three times three times yes and it It was just very time consuming.

1:04:50So like in exposure therapy, they'd have you think that bad thought and then not say that. And it's scary. But it's helpful? It's the most helpful therapy I've ever done in my entire life. Oh, amazing. Ever in my entire life. It changed my life. And I stopped too soon, but I'm going to restart it soon. I'm excited. Great. One of the participants in a thruple I'm a part of just got pregnant. Me and the other participant, if you will, are now torn on whether or not we want to find out who the father is. Wait. Wait, so two boys, one woman. One girl. I'm on the side of clarity while the other guy doesn't want to know and wants to just raise the kid all together.

1:05:26What do you think we should do? Oh, no. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Oh, I would watch Mama Mia. Oh. One or two? One. Two. That's. Both. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Think about the kid. What do you think the kid will want? What's best for the child? I mean, I think when the kid comes out, you'll know who the father is. True. You will know. That's true. You will know. Yeah, that's tough. My boyfriend just got a pet snake and is obsessed with it, and I'm not even kidding. It's affecting my ability to finish with him in bed. Like, how do I suck up the ick because that doesn't even make any sense?

1:06:09Help. I think she's icked out that her boyfriend got a snake. Oh, I would think that is so sweet. I would find it so, like, I'm like, if you have a pet rat, absolutely what a rat i love a weird animal okay okay i mean i had a pet squirrel for a while i didn't know you could domesticate those you can't it was a biter banjo okay what was this when you grew up it was not as long ago as i wish it was it was like four years and how did you have banjo uh banjo was a sugar glider banjo and turbo was a brother and sister and where did you define banjo and turbo nashville like in the wild no no no they were they were pets but that you can't really domesticate them they're nocturnal i'm just the wrong person for this because i love weird animals right but i do think that i am like the person who has like the longest ik list ever but i do think if you actually like someone it don't really apply i you've told me that before and I think you're correct.

1:07:13Let yourself be surprised because sometimes an ick is just that you're over the person. And like you're looking for any reason. Because I think if you were madly in love with someone and they got a snake, you'd be like, aw. They got a snake. That's so endearing. I think it's sweet. I love when like boys get nerdy about that stuff. I know. What do we prescribe? Is there like a... A snake's on a plane. That's, that movie gave me nightmares. I've never seen it, but I prescribe it. Is it good? I couldn't fly for so long. There's a scene where a snake comes up from the toilet What? And I literally couldn't use the bathroom on a plane for the longest time because I was like, the snake's going to come and bite me.

1:07:47Sorry, now that we're talking about movies again, you need to watch Scandal. And I know that it's a TV show. I'm just like thinking about how you haven't seen it. And it is so mind-blowing to me. Like, do you like soap operas? I don't know if I've really watched. I mean, I watched Grey's Anatomy. What? You would love Scandal. Oh, my God. It's the best. It's made by the same person. I promise. Do you like Grey's Anatomy? Oh, is it Shondaland? Yes, it's Shonda. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Sorry. And you know what? Dare I say Scandal is better than Grey's Anatomy. Well, careful. Because Carrie.

1:08:15Careful. No. Careful. I'm telling you it's better. It changed. Is there a musical episode of Scandal? Because there is in Grey's Anatomy. No, there's not. But the music, the needle drops in Scandal are all like jazz songs. Oh. No, and they're so good. Okay, okay. Like there's one scene where they're like, you know. Okay, do you know like the premise of the show? It's like the president and Olivia are like in love, right? Like you know that, right? They're in love or they're having just like a sexual affair? Like a torrid affair. Oh, okay. And there's a scene that's so heated with them. Did you learn torrid affair from Taylor Swift?

1:08:47Yeah. I did. I fucking did. There's a scene where like he's like, like watch me earn you. Like watch me choose you and what's the song playing in the background of it? It's like, I think it's Sam Cooke's Nothing Can Change Just Love. Nolan just. Like my nipples are hard. Like it seriously. Mine too kind of. And they played the most beautiful rendition of Bridge Over Troubled Water the other day. No, it's amazing. Okay, okay. It's amazing. You love a needle drop. You love, you love, you love. More than anything. And I'll tell you my favorites right now if you would really like to know. Yeah, yeah, I want to know.

1:09:22Girls Season 1 Episode 3, Robin Dancing on My Own. Oh, yeah, yeah. What about, okay, there's a really good Fiona Apple song, Valentine and Girls When They're All Dancing. You know, I've never really listened to Fiona Apple. And I know I need to. I know I need to. It's okay. We can be different. I know I need to. I know she's like one of the greatest of all time. She is. And I think especially like the girls that you love now are all influenced by Fiona Apple. Right. I'm going to. Yeah. Do you have a favorite needle drop? No. Should I? No. I can't. I don't. I mean, no, I don't. You never watch Mr.

1:09:54Robot, right? No, you've been telling me. There's a scene of Mr. Robot in season three. I think it's season three, episode seven. And they have this song called In Time by Robbie Robb. and one of my favorite needle drops I've ever heard in my life. Also, Crowded Places by Banks and Girls was amazing. Oh, wait, isn't 212 and The Bling Ring? Yeah, iconic. Iconic. Iconic. Also, this isn't a needle drop, but there's, in the movie The Skeleton Twins, have you seen this? No. Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig, my two favorite people in the whole world. Wait, I've heard of this movie. What is it about? You will love it.

1:10:28They're twins, and he tries to take his own life and then moves back in with her. And it's like when she still lives in their hometown and like he revisits this teacher that he had an affair with when he was a student. And it's like devastating and so funny and they're just so electric in it. I love when comedians play drama. Oh my gosh. It's so good. They're both such great actors. And there's a scene where they sing. Fuck, what is the song? Oh, Nancy, we're crazy. Oh my God. We can build this. We can build this world together. Nothing's gonna stop us. I think it is that song. Whatever. It's really, really good.

1:11:10And that's one of my favorite musical numbers in a movie of all time. Also, what's the one in Grey's Anatomy when Katherine Heigl is running after Danny? Is it How to Save a Life? Yeah. No, it's Chasing Cars. Those, to me, feel like the same song. Yeah, for sure. Are they both the fray? No, one's... Nolan, you would know this. It's Chasing Cars. Snow Patrol. Snow Patrol. Snow Patrol and How to Save a Life as a Fray. And then I'm trying to think of other... I'm just like a whore for a good needle drop. Yeah. The finale of... Have you ever seen The Hills? No. They do an acoustic version of Unwritten in the finale of The Hills.

1:11:48It's amazing. Oh, the OC when they play the Imogen Heap song. Oh, what? Yeah. Yeah, Hide and Seek. I've never seen The OC, but I know that scene. Wait, is it the Imogen Heaps song? No, no, no, they play Hallelujah. No, and they do the Imogen Heaps song. You were right. It's so good. I love Hallelujah. So many versions. My boyfriend. I love Hallelujah. My boyfriend of over a year is slash was kind of addicted to weed. He recently claimed to quit for me, but one of our mutuals told me he smokes a lot behind my back. What do I do? The problem. Oh, hi, Emily. The problem is not the weed smoking. the problem is the lying jinx yeah jinx i agree and also like quitting for someone i've never that doesn't like when i quit that's not good for myself you can't quit for someone else it's you resent them and then it's too much pressure you have to choose for yourself so if he quit for you that's like he didn't really want he didn't really quit either yeah have you ever seen the show dope sick yes with caitlin who you had on who i love changed my life it's that show is so upsetting.

1:12:55So upsetting. Have you seen Birdman? No. Is that the one that was like shot in one shot or something? Yes. Oh my God. It's so good. Is he in it? Yes. He's the Birdman. Okay. Got it. He is Birdman. I'll give it a watch. Also in the same, this is not to compare opioids and weed, but warning this drug may kill you. Oh, I've never seen that. What's that about? It's so sad. It's about the opioid epidemic in the US. Just to bring the mood down a little bit, but it's really good. Is it a documentary or a movie? Documentary. Okay. Oh, interesting. I'm going to watch it. Yeah, watch it. I used to watch like so many documentaries about that.

1:13:28It was like a weird. I was going through a weird time. I have this almost strange supernatural ability that almost every single curb, wet floor or slushy is. What? I don't understand this one. And it's giving me OCD. And I can't. Okay. She's saying that like she trips on everything. So do I. Like, wait, I think. Hold on. What's the problem? Yeah, that is what she's saying. That is what she's saying? Yeah. she's like how do I deal with embarrassment not the fact oh I have a good one for this okay should I finish reading yeah okay just to give her the floor yeah I have this almost strange supernatural ability that almost every single curb wet floor slushy is either being tripped or or on or tripped into like I am the clumsiest bitch in America it has nothing to do with anything eyesight contacts mentality mentally sorry and I just have to do with me having zero spatial awareness it ruined graduation it's ruining days and everybody finds it funny but like I'm so sick of it I might be hopeless but please help okay this is not a real problem right it's not a real problem everyone trips all the time it is embarrassing to trip when you're not with friends because right you know people saw and you but here's this is what I do if I trip I just look at the nearest person and I say are you okay do you really do that yeah you and are they like what it just confuses them yeah and then it like gets the attention off you are you trip just look at the person next to you go are you okay are you the type of person where if someone's arguing with you and they say something really mean do you go what did you say so they have to repeat what they've said that's a really good tactic no I've never I just feel like you would be emotionally intelligent enough to do that I I do a version of that on set sometimes like if someone asked me to do a pose that I don't want to do I'm totally outing myself but no one that I work with is probably going to listen to this I think it's okay um where if they're like can you do this pose i go i don't understand can you show me and then they try to do it and they're like never mind because it's weird because it's weird right yeah kaya what did we learn today oh my god it happened so fast this was amazing it was so fun dare i say one of the best stop so good oh no you have to say that nolan i don't have to have you been nervous in front of anyone yeah who have you been nervous in front of benny blanco because i'm a huge fan yeah charlie Yeah, I was nervous in front of Charlie too.

1:15:47XCX. Ed Sheeran. Ed Sheeran's my favorite. Yeah, I love Ed Sheeran. I just love him. He's amazing. That episode is so funny. That was the first house call we ever made. That was like the first of... First, when we did Tate McRae for the first time, like that we had done two episodes with friends. Oh yeah, I was nervous for that. I was like shitting bricks. And Glenn Powell was one of the first. I was nervous for Glenn. Even though I love Glenn, but I was nervous because he was the first act. I think it was the first actor we had on. Oh yeah. Yeah. So I was nervous. Well, besides Renee, but like when I was promoting music, he was promoting a movie.

1:16:16Yeah. So what did we learn today? I learned that your husband's gonna love you so much. Thank you. He's not gonna love you as much as I love you, but he's out there. There's time for you to find your husband. That's what I learned. I learned that I have to watch Scandal. You need to watch Scandal. And I learned that I have to watch Birdman and I also have to watch Blonde. Yes. And I have to read the charts. Please. Which I already knew I was going to read, but you've sold it on me. I wouldn't recommend you a book that I didn't think you'd like because I don't need you to hate reading any more than you already do.

1:16:49But I think you'll love it. Have you ever read A Little Life? Yes. Is it as sad as people say it is? Yes. Okay, I need to read that. You're reading that book and you go, things can't get worse. That's what everyone says. And then they do. And I was sitting at the pool the other day and the woman next to me was reading it and she was about halfway through. And I literally looked at her and I go, you have no idea what's coming for you. She was like, la, la, la, la, la. And then I was just like, you're about to get wrecked. Will just read it, right? Yes. Got it. Where's Will? We should invite him tonight.

1:17:18We should invite him tonight. Yeah, double date. That's what I think. Double date. Gorgeous. Well. What did you learn? Oh. You know what? You just might be my favorite guest ever. Don't say that to me. What did I learn? I learned. I'm glad I was so impactful. No, I learned. I learned. Fuck. No, there was something you said that really. That just Oh oh I learned that reading Is a muscle Yes And that you have to practice You're not just good at reading Yes And date your friends Date your friends If you can And Yeah And I love you And I'm not mad at you And you're not mad at me And I'm not mad at you Thank you so much I was waiting for that Thank you I love you I love you Do you want to give a little Bye pussies Where do I look There Where Right there Where Oh Bye pussies Yay!

1:18:38salmon plate, and roasted bacon brussel side. The season's most desirable menu has returned to Sweetgreen, featuring fall's best dressed. Make your move. Order on the Sweetgreen app.