253: Happy Updates Only..

34:37Like, it's just like, that is such a vulnerable space. And you just made that vulnerable space, not safe, not comfortable. So what do you do? Also, like if I've gained weight, trust me, I know. I know. I will be very well aware, but you pointed it out is just like, oh, fuck. Now someone's noticed. And now I'm like, that's so much worse. I know. I thought we were to a better time where like we really have like stopped commenting on people's bodies and like stuff. No. We haven't. I'll tell you right now. We haven't. The comments I've gotten, insane. I just like I don't understand and I don't know if it's like it's from people like not thinking people are going to see it or hear it.

35:22But like someone was like is Morgan pregnant on like my wedding pictures? No. Okay. Thanks. What do you imply? That's actually crazy. And then someone else like on like a dress picture I posted and I don't even post that much. So it's just like why? Why are we doing this? Someone was like oh you have a great figure. That dress is ugly. Blah blah blah. And it's like. Why? Why would you say that? It's like I was in my luteal phase. I was bloated as fuck. I go, this was all I was wearing. So just like, also, what can I change about it? I'm pictured in it. I took a video in it. I clearly wore it to this fucking event.

35:56What can I change about this now? If you can't change it, hearing a comment about it is just so hurtful. What do I do about this? And Alejandra said this like years and years ago. it's like if someone can't change something in like 10 to 15 seconds don't comment on it if it's like a piece of spinach in their teeth you should tell them because then they can get it out if it's oh you've gained weight can they change that in 10 to 15 seconds no okay let me just go to the gym then okay like no so it's just like be kind be kind and don't do tiktok trends on your partner when they never end up going well very rarely yeah unless it's like and they're if they go well it's probably pre-planned a lot of those pranks and stuff on tiktok yeah so don't do that no i just like learned about this one prank couple on tiktok prank versus prank no sorry that was like 2010 maybe they do pranks i don't know like their content was very like coupley and they all of a sudden announced their divorce and then a girl came out of the woodwork and she was like yeah i'm pregnant with his baby oh wait do you know the name of this chrissy and she's just like beautiful seems so sweet like and like they were together i think like 14 16 years like crazy long time it's just super shitty super sad i have not heard of them but i love tea i love drama That's a rabbit hole.

37:29You'd like to fall down, I'm sure, because it had some doozies. Okay, so this next one I have is actually brought to you by State Farm. As a lot of us know, life has a way of throwing big moments at us all at once. Getting married, moving houses, buying a new car, starting a new job. And when you take the time to prepare, like by talking to a State Farm agent, those moments don't just happen. They land the way they're meant to. So as we're going through this next story, I really want us to try to pinpoint the moment that just mattered the most. This is the thing that tipped the scale for our OP here and really just made this happen.

38:12This is titled, I unwittingly created a family with my next door neighbor. Unwittingly? Unwittingly. Can I get the definition for that? Oh, yes, you certainly can because it is a big word for Elmo. unwittingly without being aware unintentionally yes many users unwittingly expose their personal details to strangers online unwittingly that's a good example three years ago a woman named cassie 32 female and her son kenny 13 male moved into the apartment next door they had a few boxes so I figured I'd, 31 male, offer to help and get off to a good start. I noticed Kenny had a PS4, so I told him that I gave him as well, and he was free to come over and play my systems anytime he wanted if his mother allowed it.

39:08I have a PS5, Switch, a PC, just as an FYI. Since I'm a mechanic, I told Cassie if she had car trouble, she could come to me anytime since I help out a lot of the other people on the floor with their cars as well. She accepted. I didn't really interact with either Kenny or Cassie besides a few haze for a couple of weeks initially, but a little more than a month after moving in, Cassie knocked on my door and asked if I could check her car because the engine wasn't turning over. Turns out the spark plugs needed to be changed, which was easy enough to do. Cassie was very thankful for my help and offered to pay, but I told her it was no problem.

39:47She invited me to dinner with her and Kenny, and I was hesitant to accept, but she insisted on it. The next day, we had dinner, and it was a good time. I learned a lot about her and talked to Kenny more. He's a good kid, really into games, science, and his guitar. We even all went over to my place for some Mario Kart. From then on, I got really close to Kenny. I viewed him like a little brother. He came over to play my games almost every day, and I even started teaching him about cars. I even brought him to my shop to introduce him to tools. He's a quick study, and he even told Cassie he wants to be a mechanic like me.

40:27I told him to aim higher and become an engineer. He is now even looking into engineering programs. I think Cassie really appreciated our relationship. She became a lot more friendly with me I got covid during lockdown and out of the kindness of her heart. She brought me groceries cleaned my apartment and even took care of me I was totally grateful She even cooks dinner for me every night and we all have dinner together She even makes dinner for me when I work late and then leaves it in my apartment The other day kenny brought one of his friends over to his apartment I met the friend and he said this is op.

41:06He's like my dad Not gonna lie, that took me by surprise. I always viewed Kenny as my little brother, but here he is saying that I'm like a dad to him. I asked Cassie about this, and she seemed surprised I even asked. She said that she would never force that role on me, but that he did view me as his father. He even hoped that me and Cassie would get together so that we can be a real family. Cassie then said she wouldn't mind that either. I knew it. I asked her if she was asking me out. She just smiled and said yes. I was surprised, but said okay. We have a dinner date this weekend, and I'm nervous as all hell.

41:52I don't want to ruin things with Cassie and or Kenny. I really do love both of them, but I'm not sure how I feel about being the father figure for Kenny. It's a lot of responsibility, and I'm not entirely sure I'm the guy for that. And Cassie, she's a really amazing woman. I just hope I can measure up to her expectations. I'm just asking Reddit, are my worries unfounded? Should I put some boundaries between me and Kenny? How do I not screw this up with Cassie? He's overthinking. He's overthinking. it's so cute the thing is is you don't have to change anything that you're doing because it's already there there's just a label on it now which is freaking them out i know but like just keep doing what you're doing the foundation's there yeah you don't need to change no and it started you didn't have any ulterior motives no which is bless very rarely in life do you ever like as long as op is being truthful of course but like i'm getting reliable narrator here yeah But like you don't get like especially I can imagine as a seemingly single mom, Kenny's with her full time.

43:01You don't hear about a dad. You don't hear about Kenny going to his dad's. She's probably got the weight of the world on her. And it's like it's hard being a single parent. So to have this guy who's just super neighborly and nice and takes your kid under his wing and you just feel safe. And like you have that village, a support system again. Like just I don't know. Like, obviously, there's not a lot of info we're getting, but I can just imagine like not having someone start a relationship with you based on wanting to sleep with you and just be a good person. Yeah. And also help with your kid. Sounds pretty freaking nice.

43:35That sounds like perfect. Sounds like how it's like supposed to be. I know. I know. So the top comment is, it sounds like you were already fulfilling the job requirements before you were hired. I wouldn't worry about this, OP. It sounds like the start of something beautiful. Next person down, quite literally this. You've already been doing all the right things. No reason to worry now. Just keep doing what you've been doing. Someone responds to that and goes, he's that guy who's very good at doing something until he realizes that he's doing the things he's good at. Suddenly he panics and wonders if he's good enough to do the thing he's already been unknowingly doing.

44:16Exactly. Like, don't overthink it. Just don't put the label on it. is fine and sometimes like putting a label on stuff it's scary overthinking it it's just like if it ain't broke don't fix it like yeah and like yeah okay you're now you're dating there's a little bit different of stakes they might be a little higher yeah there's like there's something to lose now yeah but she likes you for you so just keep being your kind authentic genuine self and if you work you work but this sounds like it was a relationship kind of founded on friendship so So even if maybe you don't work romantically. You would still be friends.

44:53You would hope so. Yeah. As long as no one does something terrible. No. And especially for Kenny's sake now. Yeah. Since he's attached. You want to, you know, help the kid. Keep the kid around. He's so cute. Also, I love the mom segue being like, I wouldn't mind if you were his father either. What a segue. Someone would throw in a daddy joke here. Like, she wants to call him daddy too. you know like that's what it's giving she do she does she's into it so we get an update 10 days later and i will add the original post is coming from october 18th 2022 okay so op said like oh she took care of me when i got covid like covid granted it could have been three months before this post like covid is around still i mean i just talked to someone who got covid so People are really getting sick right now.

45:49Like flu and cold season and COVID season this year has been crazy. But it also could have been, you know, a year ago, two years ago. Like Cassie moved in three years ago. So it's not like this all happened overnight. This has been three years. This has been three years. COVID then came 2020. It started. So she had already been living there for a year. And then he potentially got sick somewhere in that time span. A woman doesn't just take care of you for fun if you have COVID. No. No. She's been feeling these feelings. She's into it. Before we get into the update on this one, did you guys think of a moment that mattered the most in this story?

46:31What changed OP's fate? What tipped the scale? For me, it felt like when he really took Kenny under his wing, but I think the second one that stood out is him fixing Cassie's car because car trouble is beyond stressful. But I would love to see what you guys think in the comments. And thank you State Farm for presenting this story for us because it is a good one. Big life moments come with enough change on their own. With State Farm, you can focus on what matters most, knowing you're prepared for whatever comes next, like this update. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. So the update comes 10 days later.

47:11Hey all, thanks for all the nice comments on the first post. It's weird being complimented so much, but I guess I like it. LOL.

47:21Don't we all? I've definitely said that sentence before. Also, this update was originally posted in relationships, but they won't let me post it for whatever reason. People were demanding an update, so here I am. Some things to clarify before the update. People were asking me if I'm actually attracted to Cassie. And the answer is yes. She's one of the strongest, nicest, most considerate people I know. She constantly puts people before herself, and I always wished that someone would put her for once. And did I mention that Cassie is super pretty? I guess I just never thought Cassie would find me attractive or be interested in me that way.

48:00Now the update. I was nervous as hell all week leading up to the date on Saturday. During our usual family dinners, Cassie smiled at me a lot more. I don't think Kenny noticed since he was too busy playing on his phone. Cassie, not so subtly, suggested to Kenny that he go spend a weekend with his grandparents. He didn't really want to, but she pretty much pushed him out the door. LOL. On Saturday evening, I knocked on Cassie's door and she opened it up wearing an absolutely beautiful dress. I broke the tension and asked if that dress was for me. She laughed and we went on our way. The evening was a little awkward at first, but when we were walking to the restaurant, she grabbed my hand and smiled at me, and it sort of got rid of the awkwardness.

48:46From there, the evening went amazingly. We talked, laughed, and had a great dinner. I asked her what made her change her mind about me, and she said it was the previous Christmas. For reference, Cassie is a hard-working single mom, and Kenny has all of his needs met and more, but she can't afford to get him the best, and it really hurts her that she can't. She really wanted to get him a PS5 since he was begging for one, but she couldn't justify the cost. Since I have disposable income, I hunted for months, checking stock drops until I finally got one. I then surprised Kenny with it on Christmas and told him it was from his mom.

49:29Cassie was shocked and even started crying. Kenny was so excited, he didn't even notice her crying. All she could tell me was thank you repeatedly. Apparently, that made her realize that she wanted me in both of their lives forever. She tried to deny her feelings, but it didn't work. The conversation the other day was the opening she needed to finally confess how she felt. After dinner, we went back to her place for a nightcap. We talked a lot about relationship expectations and how we want to proceed. We agreed to be exclusive, to take it slow, and not to tell Kenny about anything until we're sure that this relationship is real and strong.

50:07We don't want to give him unrealistic expectations. She also said that her calling me his dad was too much too soon and she apologized for it. She said it was wishful thinking on her part and probably would have weirded out most people. She said for me to accept any role with Kenny that I wanted, but she hoped that I would see Kenny as a son eventually. Sorry to disappoint everyone. We didn't do the deed. We decided that it was too much too soon. We did, however, have a buzzed makeout session, lol. The following day, we went for brunch and decided to go apple picking. It felt damn good to be walking hand in hand with someone you care about and taking lots of pictures doing silly things.

50:52At our family dinner yesterday, Cassie sat close to me and was rubbing her foot on my leg. I don't think I've ever been more turned on in my life, lol. I'm not going to lie, guys. I think I'm falling for Cassie and falling hard. You're already face planted on the ground, my guy. You have fell. Like, you have fallen. What? Well, anyways, I think that's it. We're together now and hopefully this lasts. I don't think I want anyone else. Cassie is everything one could want in a partner. And I hope that I can be worthy of her. She's a really special person. Thanks, everyone. You're all so kind. Wow.

51:28That was a good update and a good story. We're all good. Yeah. I'm taking notes. We have more. Wait, what? Yeah. So this is coming a month and a half later. Are they getting married already? so op shares like a baby update in response to someone's not like not pregnant okay i love the word baby and tiny okay you mean okay yeah i see i love the word little hey you little cutie like i just everyone is little for me so someone goes just do her already she's probably very frustrated. Respectfully, another frustrated woman with a clueless guy. Okay. All right. They're like, fuck her. Literally. I'm invested in other reasons for this story, but okay, sure.

52:22Okay. So OP responds, this was the funniest comment I've read on here so far. Believe me, I'm no choir boy and I would love to take Cassie to pound town. why why say it literally ew but i want to respect her and not just seem like i'm in it for the sex taking it slow means not running around like horny teenagers unfortunately but i dare say things have been progressing nicely we cross little milestones almost every day and we're working towards the big ones also it's way too early for the l word but i don't know how to describe it as anything other than that. Since people like our story, I'll give you a small little update.

53:06We spent Thanksgiving with her parents. Her mother always liked me and was our biggest shipper. Right away, she sussed it out. I guess just by the way we were looking at each other or our energy or something. Women are really good at that kind of stuff, lol. Her mom pulled us aside and asked if we were together. We denied it at first, but she just gave us that come on face. We gave in and admitted it. She hugged me and practically squeezed the life out of me, lol. Her mom couldn't even hide her smile the rest of the night. Meanwhile, while me and her dad were talking at dinner, Cassie was not so subtly rubbing her feet up and down my legs, causing me to stutter a couple times.

53:52Her dad asked me if I was all right. I just said I had bad heartburn. Honestly, I feel like I'm a damn high schooler again. This is all so new, dangerous, and exciting. Like it's almost forbidden in a way. As for Kenny, little man doesn't suspect a thing, I think. We've been restoring a car together and that's been keeping his mind occupied. Plus, he's too busy chasing his own crushes. Oh, cute. And then. Felt like there was more. There was more. I could just sense that there was another update. This update is coming April 29th, 2024. 18 months later. They're married. They're married for sure.

54:35They have a kid on the way. The post is titled because this was posted in True Off My Chest. And the post is titled, My girlfriend just sent me roses to my workplace and I don't know what to do with myself. Okay, in the break room at work and I'm grinning like an idiot and I don't know what to do with my hands. So I'm typing this out to get rid of all of this nervous energy. I work as a mechanic and my boss called me over to the office. I thought I fucked up somehow, but he had a big ass bouquet of roses on his desk. He told me, this is for you. I was like, what the fuck? But I read the card attached to it and it said, quote, just because, love, girlfriend.

55:18My boss laughed at me and told me that I had a good one and to not fuck it up, lol. He did say he'd have to give me shit for it, but he's happy for me. Sure enough, the boys on the floor ripped me to shreds once they heard about it, but I didn't care. I was floating, lol. They're just jealous. Now I'm on my break and I can't stop thinking about how much this completely caught me off guard. Can someone please talk me down from going out and buying her a ring after work? LOL. I'm shocked he hasn't already. Do it. Yeah. Do it. Why not? Do it. Prove it. Do it. Top comment. Ah, so sweet. Not going to stop you.

56:01LOL. If they already talked about marriage being a possibility, absolutely go for it. If not, maybe check with her first how she's feeling on the matter. The proposal itself can be a surprise, but marriage shouldn't be. That was 2024? That was 2024. So someone goes, found her account, LOL. And then everyone in the comments is like, for the love of God, tell us her username. Link, please, please send the link. They never share it. So if we have some sluice out there. They just wanted attention. They didn't find it. they just wanted people yeah what the hell to whatever OP does clarify that like the guys are happy for him they're just kind of busting his chops that's just mechanic vibes yeah they know very well who she is because she delights in embarrassing me at work sometimes she randomly pops in to drop me off lunch and won't leave until I give her a kiss and I'm not talking a peck on the cheek either whoa someone responds getting ripped by the boys is a seal of approval i feel like yeah yeah so i'm not seeing any comments and like i'm trying to be like i bought my boyfriend flowers i'm like trying to like yeah um not seeing any any things but we have talked about this on the podcast before like I don't care who it is.

57:30Go buy a guy in your life flowers. We read a story. I don't remember exactly what it was, but someone was like, men, guys, boys, whatever, don't get flowers really at all in life. The one time is their funeral. Damn. And they're dead. They can't appreciate it. They don't know they got them. So as a little feel-good moment this week, take an opportunity to go buy a guy in your life some flowers. that could be cute it would be adorable should i bring my guy friend flowers absolutely at dinner tomorrow absolutely should i do that in honor of the story yes if you don't i'm gonna be pissed what yeah yeah say less you need to now well now i feel like i have to you have to absolutely go to trader joe's they've got great cheap flowers yeah most grocery stores do unless it's a bougie grocery store then it's like the arrangement prices are crazy no i trader joe's has great flowers no need for more too okay so op does have an edit on that post okay hey everyone i'm finally off to work and i'm still really flustered but i think i've calmed down lol i don't think i'm gonna get her a ring today but i have to do something problem is i don't know what she deserves absolutely everything but i can't think of anything that would equal this i do have an idea of taking her on a last minute romantic getaway this weekend also to everyone asking yes the woman in my story is cassie from my previous posts oh that's confirmation yeah yeah so just so we know it is they're still together okay yeah that would have been crazy if he was like this is a brand new woman oh i would have had people in shambles i would have been wrecked I would have been like, there's no hope.

59:14I would have been fucked up. Love isn't real. Yeah. And then we get another update after that post. It's a month later. So this is from May 20th, 2024. Okay. So this May, we're like nine months. Nine months after. It's 2026. Oh my God. It's okay. so this is like a year a year and nine months yeah I know it's tough I'm not right in the head no no it's just this year it's just this year I keep calling Justin's piano I keep calling it a computer I keep like okay that one's crazy I'm like I'm literally gonna go get a brain scan because I'm like what is what's up it's just tough the words are all jumbled yeah but I'm 31 about to be 32 it shouldn't be this hard to talk no I still feel that Okay, update.

1:00:10Hey, well, I have good news for you. After that little stunt Cassie pulled, I decided that I really needed to stop waiting and make Cassie an honest woman. Period. I was waiting until we had closed on a house, but I realized that was just an excuse. So I had a secret discussion with her parents, and when I told them that I plan on proposing to her, her mother practically jumped through the roof, lol. She then immediately went into planning mode about the best way to propose to her and what kind of ring she wants, all of that stuff. Honestly, I don't know who's more excited, me or her, lol. The most hilarious thing about this is that Cassie saw how giddy I was after the roses and she was happy I liked them, but she had to calm me down and told me not to do anything stupid, lol.

1:00:58I did end up planning a very nice weekend away over Memorial Day weekend, just the two of us at a lake house. I don't know exactly when or where I'll propose, but I guess if people want it, I'll update. There better be an update. That's it. That's what we get? That's all we get. So in order for us to get a further update, I think we all need to go message OP on Reddit. The top comment, though, on Boru just says, My headcanon is that they got so busy Planning the proposal Wedding The rest of their happy lives That they forgot about Reddit I hope so That's As they should They 100 % They're married They're living in a nice new house With little Kenny It's what a year Nine I don't know what the matter is A year and nine months Okay We have a lot of update That we can cover here I know I feel like they're married OP I need you I need you to come back in Just like let us know I know Just a quick one.

1:01:59Just let me know that I'm right. Just, yeah. Just nice. Nice and, you know, whatever. I mean, they are a part of the three-year club on Reddit now. I'm going to literally send them a chat right now. I was like, hi, OP. Just like, let me know where you're at. Sent. Do you think he'll... I'm just going to say a little prayer. Say a little prayer. Say a little prayer for you. Somewhere in there. For me. For me. Actually. For us. For all of us. Oh my god my feet are out But I feel like It's gotta be happy I mean clearly in love She's sending this guy flowers at work I mean I guess there's a chance he like logged off Because it was bad but I'm not gonna put that into the universe Hell no I don't think that's the case It's a happy ending theme That was happy Cut what I just said Don't ruin it for us Cut that No I think like I think that is true When life is just like so good you do kind of forget about like innocuous things yeah he's living his best life he is he's confident in himself now he don't need reddit no more he don't need reddit no more bye hey but we can never forget where we started so update us yeah that's what we're saying just let us know you're happy just confirm it that's all we're asking just like a little update that was cute it was adorable The next one, I don't know.

1:03:23Perfect. We're going to move along to this one. And since OP was a mechanic, we're going to have like a little one about a... This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Okay, real talk. To-do lists are unhinged. And the stuff that actually gets done, always the stuff you had help with. Flat pack furniture, meal prep, things that are just better with another person. Now, State Farm can't help with the sofa or Sunday cooking. But when it comes to helping find the right coverage for you, they're on it. You can talk to one of their 19 ,000 local agents in person over the phone through their easily accessible app or at statefarm.com.

1:03:59Whatever works for you. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. This episode is brought to you by Credit Karma. Breathe in. Now breathe out. You feel that? That's the calm of having Intuit Credit Karma in your corner. If you're trying to get your life together in this crazy world, Credit Karma is a great place to start with the money stuff. Your credit score isn't just a number. It can unlock better rates, more options, and real savings. So whether you're moving, leasing a car, or upgrading your cards, it feels good knowing your credit is working for you. When you start to feel like there's too much on your plate, you can count on credit karma for less craziness and more credit.

1:04:39Car. Okay. Yeah. All right. Okay, so this is coming from Am I the Asshole? Perfect. Three years old now. It is titled, Am I the Asshole for telling my girlfriend the way she talks about her car is weird and embarrassing? Is this a boyfriend or a girlfriend? I, 25. No mention. Whoa. I, 25, have been dating my girlfriend, 23, for about nine months now. When she turned 21, her parents gave her a car and she decided to name it Angie. I learned all of this on our first date when she said, quote, Angie took me here. I thought that was odd, but let it slide. Throughout our relationship, she's always talked about her car as if she's talking about another person.

1:05:29When she got a flat tire on the highway a few months back. She called me and said that Angie's shoe broke and has to get a new one. When she goes to the car wash, she describes it as giving Angie a bath. This all came to a head this weekend when me and my friends went out drinking and my girlfriend offered to be the designated driver. We were out for a couple of hours and I admittedly got a bit too drunk. When my girlfriend came to pick us up, she said she's stopping at the gas station first quote to get Angie something to drink. This is where I may be the asshole. I told her I think it's weird and embarrassing of her to talk about her car like that.

1:06:12It's a machine not a pet or a kid and that she should treat it like how a normal person would treat any machine. What does that mean? She got very quiet and refused to say anything for the rest of the drive home. She dropped off my friends and then drove to my apartment. I asked her why we weren't going back to hers, and she said that she needed some time to think and told me to get out. She's been radio silent since then, and I'm starting to think I did something wrong. Am I the asshole for what I said? Yeah, homie needs to get a sense of humor. Angie? It's Angie. let her live I know so many people that name their car and like that's not an abnormal thing no it's just funny it's funny it's goofy silly it's cute like think about people that work in their cars and they're driving their cars all day every day like they're home on wheels like god forbid they want to personalize it a little bit and be like ah old Bessie good job today didn't blow a wheel it's like so not that deep and like yeah I think they just don't mesh personality wise at that point because it's like also you need to treat the machine the way you treat all machines what does that mean what does that even mean it's like me like I say thank you to my Siri yeah I've heard you do that it's funny and it's like you know it's like but like Justin's like fuck Siri like he just can't get with Siri yeah but I'm like mine is so nice like I he helps me find my phone when I lose it 20 times a day sure so I don't know like I think some people just look at things so impersonally or coldly but that energy like you need to treat it like a machine yeah it is what it is that almost gives the same energy as like you're being too nice to your dog it's an animal and i know it's somewhat different right like okay it's a car versus a dog but like lack of empathy for like i know it's a car but like yeah her feelings towards the car at least people love their car people don't want to get rid of their car sometimes like it hurts people to like get rid of their first cars i know and it was a gift like from her parents like it's it's very meaningful yeah i think like as long as she's not going underneath the car and like having sex with it like i think we're fine yeah because people do do that have you seen that show uh yeah there was a guy that was in love with his little red car it's like a corvette or something or mustang i don't even know yeah you go under it and sleep like you'd fuck it oh yeah no i know some people are into that.

1:08:47I saw an update on him actually quite recently. Is he still doing it? So that car got in a car accident. It's totaled. He has a new car. So he moved on. He has a relationship with that. That one. So he was just ready to fall in love with whatever car came to him first. Yeah. He likes four wheels on his woman. Hell yeah. Good for him. But like I don't know. Like let people live as long as they're not hurting anyone. I think like I think it just gives him the ick for the most part it gives him the ick he didn't know how to handle the fact that he's getting the ick from it yeah and if that person if that is giving you the ick that's just not your person no because it's just not that deep no I think it's cute I don't know it's not that serious for me it's like yeah whatever it's not hurting you you know who Angie is it's not like you're like who the fuck is Angie you know Angie's the car and you literally like hurt her feelings when she's doing you a favor like she was the designated driver and was driving you and your friends all over town.

1:09:46But that's what it was. She said it in front of his friends. That gave him the ick. He was embarrassed by it. And then he confronted, then he like, he's like, oh, I don't want any part of this Angie business in front of his friends. I'm trying to think of what like boys do that's just like embarrassing and they just do it all the time. And it's like - I hate when they spit. I can't stand people chewing tobacco and the little spit bottles. They're not even chewing tobacco. They just spit. What is up with that? I don't know I'm gonna think of something but like it's just there's some boys that call their cars names too well that's why I was like I feel like every boy names their car am I wrong?

1:10:27I need to I'm gonna text Justin be like does your car have a name? I've never asked him I feel like you'd know if his car had a name like it might have a name but he doesn't refer to it as its name I know I'm gonna who else has a car? I'm gonna text everyone I know that has a car who has a car? Does your car have a name? I will say my car does not have a name. Mine doesn't either. But I'm just like... My old one did. It was Finn. Because it was this like baby blue little thing. Oh, cute. Baby blue kind of gave dolphin. I had a little dolphin plastic that sat up on top. Was that your first car?

1:11:00No. Okay. Did you name your first car? Well, my first car blew an engine pretty quickly after getting it. So... It didn't have time. We didn't bond. You didn't bond like that. We didn't bond like that. Was Finn your second car? Yeah. Okay, that's... Oh, Finn was my third car. I had a lot. So I was very poor in high school. So like my first car cost like, I think it was like$1 ,200. And so that's why we literally bought it in the engine blue. And then I drove my mom's minivan. So it wasn't my car. I couldn't name that. And then I got another car. But this car, like it would smoke off oil. Like it had oil leaks.

1:11:38So like it wasn't getting too attached because it did start on fire because it was kind of smoky. I think I might have called it Smokey maybe. So then I got that and then we got rid of that because it broke. And then I drove my mom's like SUV for a while. That thing leaked gas. That thing smelled like gas, but it wasn't mine. So I didn't name that. And then I got Finn finally. Okay. So you named the first car that you actually like got attached to. I sold one of my horses to buy that car because I wanted a car that worked. You couldn't like ride your horses around town like that? No. Oh, that would have been cool.

1:12:10If only. If only. It would take me a lot longer to get places. No, they gallop. You can't run. It's not like Red Dead Red whatever Redemption. Red Dead? Dead Red? You know I don't watch things. It's a game. Oh. It's very popular. They ride horses around. No, they don't gallop endlessly in real life. Oh, that'd be cool though. And I don't think you can take a horse on a highway, so that probably wouldn't work either. No, God. No. I think I barely walk down the road. When I horse it do I have to take your horses on walks Can I ride them Okay No I wouldn't know that was such a joke I mean I'll go riding with you No I'm I'll walk them that's fine He's as smart as a baby He's a little wild Oh no I would never Back to this one though And the cars and naming your car Maybe we'll do a poll on this one and just be like how many of you guys have named your car and if you haven't named your car do it the next time you're in them like is is your car does your car have a gender like what pronouns does your car prefer like what are we feeling i feel like it's i've had my car for too long to like do that your car if i was gonna give your car something though your car gives like definitely boy.

1:13:33I think my car gives boy. My car's for sure a boy. Your car, I feel like would be like Keanu. It's kind of like, kind of mysterious. Yeah. I like it. Keanu. Yeah. You think about it though. Maybe we'll just go with that. Okay. Give your car a name. Okay. But look for the poll. I'll try I try to remember. I'm a little frazzled lately. Top comment, though, with 33 ,000 upvotes. Okay. I asked Sasha, since she's my car, and would have a better perspective on this. She said you're the asshole.

1:14:19Wait, that was so good. I love Reddit. Sasa. Sasa. Sasha also said cars need gas because they're hungry, not thirsty. She thought it was important for everyone to know. Oh, good. Yes. Wow. I told her about all of the cars, trucks, SUVs, RVs, hybrid scooters, vans, and a few laptops that responded. And I think it made her blush because she's looking a little more shiny than usual. I think that was an edit. Everyone responded, you are so right. And unfortunately, babies like Sasha and Angie need to be fed with real gas. Formula won't do it. My pickup, Tilly agrees, but she's on a diesel-only diet.

1:15:02Merv prefers premium and makes his demands known. I told him he's stuck on regular until he pays for it himself. This is so funny. Everyone's like responding as their car. My entire family names all of our cars Moosey. Moosey is a better friend than some of my human ones Cars Don't talk shit about you No they don't They allow you to cry in them safely In peace Favorite part about the car for sure They don't judge you They drive your ass around to get food Like a piece of Texas toast from Raisin Canes Delicious I'm getting a piece of toast after this Just the toast Butter both sides I love a car Yeah.

1:15:49I love a car. Well, I wish that the big three automotive industry wouldn't have fucked us up. Sure. And the Tucker would have made it into modern day distribution because by this point we'd have cars that run on salt water or some cool shit. That'd be sick. Why can't the car run on salt water and desalinize as it goes? I get it. What does desalinize mean? You take the salt out of the water. Desalinization. Oh. Hydrogen cars. Why are we not there yet? I don't know. I don't know. See, I'm pro bus, but like. I love the bus, but we don't have. It's not great. I only will take it down one road, to be fair.

1:16:28But if I could take it everywhere, I would. I used to take the bus every day to work. Really? Yeah, when I was working at UCLA at the hospital there. Really? Loved the bus. It's great. Could just relax. You don't have to do anything, too. I could be on my phone. We're talking about being driven around. Chauffeured. Ugh. Chauffeured. And it's a dollar? I know. 75. That's why I love New York and like public transportation cities, London, Paris. They've got a pretty good metro. I wish I could get rid of my car. That'd be... Keanu? Yeah, sorry. God, he just named him? He just got named and I'm like, get him out of here.

1:17:03Jeez, man. Don't do Keanu like that. No, I won't. I'm keeping him. Don't you worry. Okay, cool. So we do get a bit of an update. Update. I can't wait to see what this person has to say. Do you want to bet? Do you want to like take any guesses? I feel like the comments were like roasting them enough that I don't think they're going to be like, I was wrong. I feel like they're going to double down. There's one more comment I want to read. Okay. Okay. 16K upvotes. Okay. Jeez. You're the asshole. Just let your girlfriend enjoy her relationship with Angie. Are you jealous? Which kind of was giving that.

1:17:44People did. Yeah. People popped off. Yeah. Oh, no, the overall vote was asshole. Sure, yeah. Update. Well, she dumped me. Right. She found the post, called me, and told me to never speak to her again. I guess it's for the best, though. We really wouldn't have been that compatible, as many of you have said. Mm-hmm. Thank you for your judgments. Okay. I like it. Again, didn't admit that they were wrong. No. But, like, accepted their fate. Yes. yes I appreciate that no fighting just no fighting I'm the asshole here it is and I think that's the thing I think they just weren't compatible because they don't have a sense of humor no sorry and I think like you look at a lot of these stories on Reddit and I know it's hard like it is so hard being in a relationship growing a friendship with someone loving them building a life with them and then you get to this point where it's like oh, we're not compatible, but like I'm going to fight to make it work.

1:18:48I think it's tough. Unfortunately, I might be unemployed, but there would be a lot less stories if people just were like, at the end of the day, are we compatible or are we trying to fit a round peg in a square hole? You know what I mean? It's tough though, because it's like you do like the person, you do care about the person. For sure. And hard to differentiate the two. And relationships also can come with certain sacrifices or changes. but I thought he was going to bump his head on the camera. He's the dog is doing downward dog pose. He's like literally doing yoga under the camera. Don't you move that camera, buddy.

1:19:26So funny. I'm going to like, I had to get a picture of him. He was like sniffing it. I know. And he's stopped with the yoga now, which is really sad. Cause it was, he always be doing that downward dog too. Um, I don't even remember what I was going to say. Um, it was compatibility. Oh, just, yeah. Just like think about it more. Yeah. Because like, yeah, you can make sacrifices and compromise and whatever, but you shouldn't be like fundamentally changing yourself. Yeah. Your sense of humor. That's such a silly thing to be like in a fight about. That shouldn't be a fight. No. That's, yeah. No. No one did anything wrong.

1:20:01So like, why are we fighting? I know. I agree. Silly and let people live. Let people live. Like if it doesn't affect you or obviously have some nuance when I say this, but like if it doesn't affect you, why do you care? Like this goes about so many fucking things in life. Like genuinely people need to stop impeding on other people's abilities to live and just mind their own fucking business. I think it's because people want to have a problem. And when they don't have problems, they go find a problem. Get a fucking hobby. Literally. Go join like a knitting club or a bingo group. Not bingo. Anything.

1:20:43I'm sorry. Because it's probably fun. I love bingo. Oh, okay. We are just battling today. What the hell? Fighting. Just, I don't know, do something. Go read a book. I saw the mayor of New York just announced like, New Yorkers, you can read Heated Rivalry or listen for free to stay out of the snowstorm. And I'm like, there we go. There we go. I haven't read a book in like a year or so. I'm starting. Good job. I'm literally wearing my heated rivalry shirt. I know. You're so hockeyed out. Yeah. It's a good show. Okay. No, but I get the hockey hype. I was like, you should have seen me at my first hockey game.

1:21:25Yeah. I didn't realize it was a show. I was like, the lights, I was mesmerized. It was so cool. Hockey is amazing. I think I just want the hockey culture and community, the guys, to be nicer, be more inclusive. Because hockey is a really cool sport. But we also have professional women's hockey now. And if you want to support the gals and also be thoroughly entertained and watch good hockey. I'm so down for women's hockey. There's that too. But yeah, I think hockey is getting a bit of a culture wake-up call right now. with the heated rivalry success. And I hope it's for the better. Me too. I'm excited.

1:22:06Excited to see where it goes. Hi. Do you want to come to the meet? Hi. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Yeah. He said, I have to ask my mom for permission first. I was like, I'm going to bark at you. Did you hear him huffing and puffing earlier? Yeah. He didn't like someone out that door. He's ready to be protective. You know, I think. This episode is brought to you by Nintendo. Everyone's version of Me Time is a little different. That's why the Nintendo Switch 2 system is so fun. With exclusive and Nintendo Switch compatible games like Mario Kart World, Animal Crossing New Horizons, Nintendo Switch 2 Edition, Tamodachi Life, Live in the Dream, or Yoshi and the Mysterious Book, there's something for every vibe.

1:22:51And with upgraded hardware, play at home or on the go whenever the mood hits. Learn more at Nintendo.com slash Nintendo Switch 2. Games and systems sold separately. Some Nintendo Switch games may not be supported or fully compatible with Nintendo Switch 2. Games rated E for everyone. This episode is brought to you by Chrysler. Life with kids is basically a never-ending series of plot twists. One minute, everyone's buckled in. The next, someone's dropped a snack, lost a shoe, or needs a bathroom break immediately. That's why the newly designed Chrysler Pacifica is built for real life. With thoughtful features like stow-and-go seating, hands-free sliding doors, and passenger seating up to eight, it helps keep everything moving.

1:23:33Because family life isn't about the perfect moments, it's about making the most of any moment. Visit your local dealer or Chrysler.com to learn more and schedule a test drive today. Chrysler is a registered trademark of SCAUS LLC. He would be protective of this next one too. Let me hear it. Yeah. I, I'm not going to read this one because I just think now that there's a dog in the studio, I think it's a little bit too triggering, even though it did have a happy ending. Oh, are you sure? Rover sitter lost my dog. I used to rover. It does have a happy ending though. So, well, it's fine. This one I think is better.

1:24:15Okay. This is, whew, this is a doozy of one. It's coming from r slash relationship advice. Okay. Seven years old. Ooh. Titled, my girlfriend, 23 female, is threatening to break up with me over a prank that I, 24 male, pulled on her and her family. All right. Here we go. This past weekend was the big camping trip that my girlfriend would be taking with her and her family. It would consist of her parents, her younger sister, her aunt and uncle, and her three cousins, and it was a big family trip that was being planned for cooler weather. My girlfriend told me all about where they would be camping, and I decided to take advantage of that knowledge.

1:25:03I don't like the way that was said. I visited my girlfriend's house to say goodbye to her and wish her a fun trip And when they all took off in their cars I got in my car and drove to the campsite that they would be staying at I know the area pretty well and I was able to find a spot to hide my car from view And I was able to navigate the woods and keep an eye on them while remaining hidden from view When it came to nighttime, I put on a Chewbacca costume and ruffled it up a little to make it look wild and untamed. While the family was gathered around the campfire, I started to rustle the bushes.

1:25:41The family noticed, but they didn't think much of it. Then I started to make growling noises. The family was getting noticeably freaked out, and then my girlfriend's uncle started to walk towards where I was hiding. As soon as he got close enough, I jumped out from behind the bushes and started making roaring noises while running around acting like a Bigfoot. Okay. I shook their tent. What a weirdo. I threw their lawn chairs around and chased after some of the cousins. I heard my girlfriend's dad yell, get the gun. And that's when I knew I had to end the prank. I took off the costume, revealed myself, and the entire family was pissed.

1:26:30Yeah. What the fuck would you do that? Long story short, I got yelled at by almost all of her family, and the noise attracted the campsite manager who kicked me out after hearing what happened. Good. Today, I heard back from my girlfriend for the first time since the prank, and she said that she's seriously considering breaking up with me. I wouldn't even consider it. I just ended there. Done. You would have left single. She just said that she needs some time to think and that she'll let me know when she's made her decision. Now I'm just left wondering what I do. I'm thinking that I need to pull off a major apology and I need some advice on what to say to save this relationship.

1:27:16You're just going to have. I don't think you can save it, but you're just going to have to be like, I'm stupid. I don't know why I did that. I don't know what that was what was my brain thinking you were shaking their tents throwing their chairs around like you created such chaos that they're they're running around to get like a hunting rifle like thinking this is like genuinely Bigfoot or just some creep and it was just some creep in the woods see I believe in Bigfoot so this would have really freaked me out I would have pissed my pants I would have like It's some animal or something you don't know I mean Chewbacca like If you're like Sitting around a campfire in the dark Your eyes are not adjusted very well Like something comes at you You're already on edge too He ruffled it up You're on edge like no this is like Fight or flight man It's not gonna go well Also like who was laughing Were you laughing when you were doing this?

1:28:22It couldn't have been that funny. No, he's screaming like a bear. Yeah, you're stupid. You filmed it? Like, what was the point of it? It's so dumb. I don't know if you can save this. No. I think the only way you could is, like, you go over to her family's house and apologize to everyone. Like, genuinely apologize. Genuinely. Like, I'm so sorry, you guys. I thought this would be a funny Bigfoot prank. And I realized I took it a little too far. and I think you should do that regardless yeah even if she does still dump you it's probably the right thing to do jeez I'm just like I just don't understand where the idea came from I don't know also like seven years ago was TikTok even around then?

1:29:09they met the parents yet also? like did you know these people or was this your first impression? I mean he went over to the girlfriend's house to say goodbye and wish her fun and And then like so he saw them all there. Like it sounds like he knows the family a bit. I don't know. Still weird. Super weird. Top comment says, frankly, you are lucky you're not dead. Truly. Consider yourself lucky if all she does is break up with you. Oh my gosh. This would be one of those things where you like you're trying to go to sleep and then you have the thought of like, why did I do this? Like for the rest of your life.

1:29:47It's going to be an embarrassing nighttime thought. Someone else comments, that's pretty bad, but at least you didn't pretend not to know what a potato is. And that was another story. I don't know if we've read the potato one on here. I've seen it. Did we read the potato one? We have read one story about a potato. Am I the asshole for taking potatoes off of a guy's plate at a wedding? I don't know if we have read the potato one. the potato story we did have one about shit fisting a potato on patreon all right well that's intense that was uh june of 2023's full bonus episode lovely don't remember what it's about proceed with caution i apparently read it right after i read the jolly rancher story so um oh i don't think i remember the first jolly rancher i don't think you're gonna want to read that one oh it's in line I mean I'm sure it is in line with the Jolly Rancher story yeah so I don't know if we've read the potato one but maybe we'll if you guys want it let me know it's a funny one this guy basically just like pretends like he's never had a potato doesn't know what it is and he's doing it at dinner with his girlfriend's parents and it's like yeah it's a bit okay cool funny bit like what so yeah don't uh don't pretend that you don't know what a potato is or don't pretend to be Bigfoot either.

1:31:17Don't pretend to be Bigfoot, but he did and we do get an update. Perfect. I'm honestly really embarrassed and humiliated about this update. I almost considered not even posting it, but I feel the need to vent and express my frustrations on some way. So here it is. I really hope you don't think too badly of me and you understand what I'm going through after last night. It's too late, homie. Last night, my girlfriend's family was holding a barbecue in their backyard and my girlfriend was able to talk her dad into inviting me. He was originally against the idea of me coming, but he was willing to let me come so long as the first thing I do is offer a genuine apology for the prank that I pulled on all of them.

1:32:02Shouldn't he have done that like before? Whatever. OP, my guy. Is it like genuine though if you're being forced to do it to get the invite. That's debatable. I arrived in their backyard and everyone that I pranked at the campsite was sitting at a table and they were all clearly waiting for me to arrive. I sat down next to my girlfriend and I began my apology. I stated that my prank was ill-timed, immature, and thoughtless, and I apologized for ruining their camping trip that they had apparently been planning for some time. I tried to make it as genuine and sincere as possible, and when I was done, I waited for some type of response.

1:32:42There was a really long, awkward silence as the whole family just stared at me. Then the uncle whispered something in the dad's ear, and they both burst out laughing, but I couldn't make out what he said. The dad then said he didn't accept my apology, and then he told me to leave. He planned that. My initial response was a very loud, what the fuck? And that made things worse. Well, yeah. My girlfriend's dad kept telling me to leave and I lost my temper. I swiped an empty plastic cup off of the table and said to the family, fine, fuck all of you, while flipping them off with both middle fingers.

1:33:26As I was leaving the backyard, my girlfriend caught up to me and said that she was breaking up with me. She said that I was too immature and impulsive. And she said that she wants me to leave her and her family alone. I tried apologizing to her profusely. I kept saying, babe, I'm sorry. Just give me another chance. And I promise I'll be good. I promise. I kept saying this over and over. But she said that she's given me millions of chances and that she can't fix me. She then walked off and I did something that made things even worse. I yelled at her, calling her a bitch, and then I started kicking and punching their wooden fence that separates their front and backyard.

1:34:08I knocked down a part of the fence and then I left. All of that happened last night and I feel like shit. Part of me wants to just give up on her and move on. You should. But I also want to prove to her that I'm capable of changing. I want to promise her no more pranks along with trying to control my temper. What do you think I should do? Accept that she broke up with you and be better for your future partner. Second update. No. Long story short, I got in a fight with my girlfriend and her family last night. She's now my ex-girlfriend and I lashed out and broke down part of their wooden fence that separates their back and front yard.

1:34:48Her father hasn't contacted me about it, but I'm worried he's going to come after me eventually. what kind of trouble can I get in? This was posted in r slash legal advice. I don't, I mean, I have no idea. You could be sued for damages. Yeah. Easily. That's a small claims court kind of thing. Which, defenses are expensive. I believe that. They are shockingly expensive. But considering what all he's done, and they probably will do something about it. Oh, yeah. Man, at first, I was going to be like, because it does sound like the family planned the like, they were never going to accept the apology.

1:35:22no so at first I was like damn kind of feel I have some empathy for him but his reaction just like ruined everything if he had just like accepted the defeat and been like dang I don't know what to do about this I would have felt so differently but like you just like escalated it way further than it needed to be so much further like that could have been another test that could have been not that you should test people not that you should test people but that could have been like yeah we don't accept your apology please leave and then if you quietly got up to leave and then dad was like just kidding buddy come here like i could have seen it go like that not necessarily right they should have just said we accept well but maybe you don't have to accept someone's apology and that's true and that's just life maybe they genuinely didn't maybe it was actually a shitty apology that that's true because we're also hearing it from his perspective and he doesn't sound like the most reliable no and so maybe they just don't fuck with him anymore and they probably They don't.

1:36:17They definitely don't. And he just proved on his way out why. You're immature, impulsive, hotheaded. You're 24 going on 12. You need to grow the fuck up and go to anger management. No, seriously. And work on your executive functioning because it is seriously lacking. You can't go and punch and break down a fence because you didn't get what you wanted. Can you imagine how embarrassing you look? It just keeps getting more and more embarrassing. And hit a wooden fence? Bro. You look pathetic. Because they didn't accept your apology? Give me another chance, babe. I love you. As you're beating the fence up?

1:36:58Right. The fact that she even like. That feels safe. Almost gave you another chance. I guess she was giving him another chance. Yeah. And you, everything you did was your own choice. Everything. You did this to yourself. Like, you have no one to be upset with but you. and we just keep on going. There's more? There's more. You gotta stop while you're ahead. I know. People gotta learn to stop. They don't. They never do. Third update. I'd rather not go into detail on this post, but the reason for the breakup is on my profile and can be read there on another post. Simply put, I can't stop thinking about my ex-girlfriend.

1:37:38I can barely eat, sleep, or do anything that used to make me happy. Last night, I watched my first ever hockey game and was excited about that a few months ago. But now, I don't even care. I spent the whole game thinking about my ex and how she broke up with me. She's all I think about right now, and I feel like putting in one last effort in making her see that I'm a better man. No, you're not. What should I say to her? You haven't done any of the work yet. What can I do to get her to come back to me? Fourth update. For those who may or may not know, my girlfriend broke up with me because I pranked her and her family by dressing up as Bigfoot and ruining their camping trip.

1:38:17But I think that since some time has passed, my girlfriend might be of a cooler head and I was thinking of trying to win her back in a clever little way that involves the Bigfoot theme. Oh no. My idea is to dress up as Bigfoot again, but not to scare anyone. I'm going to dress up, go into her backyard with an old stereo or CD player that still works and play Sorry by Buck Cherry. I'll play it loud enough for her to hear and I'm hoping she'll accept it and see it as a cute apology. Can we do that without dressing up as Bigfoot? Why do we need to dress up? And maybe in the front yard where you don't have to break past the wooden fence you beat up?

1:39:00That you destroyed? He doesn't have to break past anything because he already broke it down. I know it sounds a little cliche, the whole stereo outside the window thing, but I'm hoping that the Bigfoot costume might be a new little twist on it and it'll be my way of apologizing for the Bigfoot prank. What do you think? Don't do that. You're gonna get arrested for trespassing. Fifth update. After reading through some of the responses from yesterday, I decided to just go for it and get it over with. there's no way people were telling him, yeah, man, that's the move. I'm literally going to go look at what the comments are just to be like, who?

1:39:40Yeah, who said that? Who encouraged this? I mean, it's coming from relationship advice. Maybe they didn't read the original post. Like they have no idea how like messed up things were. Top comment. One does not apologize for dressing up as Bigfoot by dressing up as Bigfoot. Yeah, who's telling you to do this? Don't do it. No one told him to do this. People go, honestly, I really think that you need to move on and leave her be. It's as simple as that. Next comment. Jesus Christ, you're an idiot. Next comment. Leave her alone. Next comment. All caps. Leave her alone. You're right, guys. I'm just going to get it over with and go do it.

1:40:21Someone here is clearly kidding. And they go, the only way to apologize for dressing up as Bigfoot is to dress up as Littlefoot. There are some awesome dinosaur costumes this year. It's good. No one said go dress up as Bigfoot and do this. That's so funny. But clearly we have some delusion. But clearly it happened. Update number five. After reading through some of the responses from yesterday, I decided to just go for it and get it over with. I dressed up in the ruffled up Chewbacca costume, grabbed the stereo, and walked over to my girlfriend's house at nighttime. We live in the same neighborhood, and there's a shortcut through a little stretch of woods that I take from my place to hers.

1:41:01And that's the route I took last night. I'm going back into the woods with the costume. I climbed into their backyard and I stood in their grass, holding up the stereo while playing the song that I had intended. Sorry by Buck Cherry. The problem is that the stereo was an old piece of shit that I dug up from my basement and the volume wasn't loud at all. It sounded muffled and I didn't want to risk moving closer to their house in case I was seen. but I wanted something to come from the night and I sat down the stereo and peered into the window that I knew led to my girlfriend's room my girlfriend was just playing with her phone on her bed and I just stared into her room for a little while I guess I was caught up in staring at her since I hadn't seen her in a few weeks and I didn't realize that I had been staring in there for a long time I turned to leave but I saw one of her neighbors out on their porch looking directly at me and they were on their phone.

1:41:59Well, yeah. My first thought was that they were probably calling the police and I panicked. I did something really stupid and I tried to go in my girlfriend's house by pulling at their back green door. But her mom saw me trying to get in and she screamed. It keeps getting worse and worse. I then ran back towards the woods and I tried to pick up the stereo, but I really hurt my back while bending over. so i just left it in their backyard the back pain was shooting down my left leg and i had to limp away from the house is this real because now it just means and i limped through the woods back to my house while also cussing at myself over how fucked up my plan was the worst part is that this morning my girlfriend called me and left a message on my phone can't wait to hear what she had to say she said that she knows it was me at her house and that she's only given me one final warning before she talks to the police about harassment charges as well as a restraining order.

1:43:05She said that she's never getting back together with me and she told me to move on. Now I'm really depressed, which is how I've been feeling in the past few weeks. I'm physically hurt from my back and leg pain and I'm emotionally hurting from my girlfriend's words i'm just really upset and pissed off what should i do i think he should not go out in public for a couple months stop just stop stay home don't interact with anyone for a while that costume that bigfoot outfit throw it away throw it away i mean um it doesn't end here though unfortunately for all of us so we do get like another post a sixth I cannot say this word a sixth update this is again going back to legal advice for this post and help for breaking and entering my ex-girlfriend left me a message on my phone threatening me with a restraining order it's just a threat at this point but I still want to know what happens to my record if she were to file one against me?

1:44:11Will it give me a criminal record and officially list me as a stalker? Is it something that appears in a background check? I just want to know how this will affect me, like getting a job or something like that. Would this affect me nationally or just in my hometown of Denver, Colorado? If you are dating in Denver, watch out. Watch out. Maybe just like don't see her again and then there will be no more threat of a restraining order. She's given you so many fucking chances yeah and you just keep going he back and like bad decision after bad decision after bad decision he is giving stalker energy you are a stalker you just walked through the woods in a bigfoot costume and stared at her through her window yeah i know that's not like it's not like he's like intention intention but it's like turning into that do stalkers not realize how bad stalking is like I want a psychologist to chime in like are people genuinely this clueless about boundaries and just how their actions appear to others you'd think he would find himself creepy but this is this is a serious level of delusion yeah update number seven okay I won't go into detail but I left a stereo of mine at my ex-girlfriend's house and this morning, I got a text from her dad.

1:45:30It was a picture of the completely destroyed stereo next to a baseball bat. And the message read, quote, that's your head if you ever come near my house again. I want to know if I can actually take action against him for this. He destroyed my stereo and threatened to bash my head in with a baseball bat. What actions can I take? This is all taking place in Denver, Colorado. Thank you. Again, that's legal advice. Update number eight. I've spent the past few weeks thinking about how I can possibly get back together with my ex-girlfriend. I've decided to just move on. She doesn't ever want me back, and I've caused enough trouble with her family as a whole.

1:46:12I need to get over her, and I don't know how. My older brother has a wedding in a few days, and it being a romantic occasion is really going to mess with me emotionally, especially since me and my ex were planning on attending together. It hurt even more to see that my ex was selling her dress and posting about it on Facebook. I can't get over the memories and all the time we've spent together, and it hurts knowing that I lost her because of my immaturity and stupidity. How do I get over this? She's literally the only thing on my mind, and it has to end. Help me out, please. Maybe it's starting to click.

1:46:50Maybe it's starting to click slightly slightly I mean here's but also there's nothing you can do this is just what it feels like to go through a breakup it sucks like breakups suck yeah you gotta heal go to therapy I think therapy like I I think it's scary because obviously this is not a one-off right like this does happen in real life people are killed by romantic partners so if you are feeling like this and you're like I just can't get over this person I can't move on you need to start talking to a professional because you do need to move on it's not healthy it's not fair it's not safe to either of you like it's just not right and it's not easy it does suck moving on from someone you love and care about but you got to move on you just have to it's just how life is So get help because it's just not, it's not right.

1:47:45No. And if you don't know how to deal with it, it can be hard. It can be jarring, but you have to. Yeah. You just, you do. We're not done. Oh no. There's no way. Ninth update. I know that most people have seen my previous posts on here and the issues with my ex-girlfriend and her father. He already threatened me violently as of last night and he's called the cops on me. and now I'm awaiting a court date here in Denver. Last night was obviously Halloween and while I don't normally trick-or-treat at my age, I ended up taking my little cousin around the neighborhood while my parents and hers were at a Halloween party.

1:48:23Don't tell me he dressed up. I also figured that I would wear my Chewbacca costume since I wanted to dress up and I didn't have any other last-minute costumes. We walked around our neighborhood for a little while and we ended up on the same block as my ex-girlfriend's house. I knew it was only an inevitable that we would cross her house, but I honestly wasn't worried about it You did this on purpose I figured that her dad may not even be out to see us and all I'm doing is trick-or-treating And that's what a stalker would say We ended up walking by her house and of course both of her parents were sitting by their garage with a bowl of candy to hand out I tried to grab my cousin and make for the opposite direction, but it was too late I heard my ex's dad yell, quote, I see you.

1:49:11And he clearly recognized me. I just grabbed my cousin and we made our way back to my house without looking back at my ex's. We got home, but almost an hour later, the cops arrived. And they told me that my ex's dad wants to press charges on me for stalking and harassment. I'm currently awaiting a court date. And I think this is all bullshit. I didn't have any premeditated plans to go near their house. Yes, you did. Nor did I have any intent with their property. I was simply trick-or-treating with my cousin, and we just happened to come across their home. The dad simply acts as if he's the king of the block and he can dictate who walks in the area.

1:49:48What can I do to prepare for my court case? What arguments can I make? I wasn't stalking the house last night, and I wasn't planning on doing anything. I simply walked by it while trick-or-treating, and the dad threw a fit. What can I do? That is delusion. I simply walked by it while trick-or-treating. I wasn't stalking, but I also wore the same costume that's gotten me in trouble with them every time. Throw it away. Yeah, please get rid of it. Donate it. Donate it because we don't want to be wasteful. Sure, sure. But what are you doing? Like you knew what you were doing. You may not like you're telling yourself this, but you know you had other intentions.

1:50:23Be so for real. Be so for real. Last final update. Bless. He has a restraining order against him. I already know. It's been a little over a month since my girlfriend broke up with me over a prank that was admittedly my fault. It was dumb, an immature move on my part, and I've accepted the consequences. That being said, I'm now in serious legal trouble over what happened a couple of nights ago on Halloween. Ended up walking by her house while taking my cousin trick-or-treating, and her dad saw me. He's now pressing charges for harassment and stalking, and I'm awaiting my court date. Last night, my ex texted me, and she was clearly drunk.

1:51:00A lot of her texts were either gibberish or in poor grammar, but I could make out what she was communicating. Basically, she was celebrating me having charges pressed against me, and she was texting me stuff like, quote, I hope you rot in jail and quote, this is all caps, lock him up. I responded with texts of my own. I called her names like the C word and bitch. But she obviously phased, but simply sending her some mean texts isn't enough for me. I honestly think that she has some nerve to kick me while I'm down. while all she has to do is just stay on the sidelines while daddy does all of the work.

1:51:43I've spent all day thinking about how I can get back at her over this. Part of me thinks that I should just wait until I'm done going to court, but I also want to strike back while the event is still fresh. So dumb. He's so dumb. I'm thinking of one final prank. What should I do? All right, this guy's a lost cause. I don't know what to do for him. Lock him up. I agree with her. Lock him up. How do I get my revenge as I'm about to be, as I'm getting charges pressed against me? Charges that are absolutely dignified and should be pressed. And I like that he circled back to a prank. Like all this became from a prank and now he's like, oh, I know what I can do.

1:52:25Another prank. And I thought I was like, I read most of these updates. I was very hopeful by the end. Yeah, it was my fault. Admittedly, my fault. It was dumb and immature. No, he's not well. And then the last line. But hey, still a happy ending in my book because she got out. For sure. Charges have been filed. They're getting pressed. And I'm hoping we don't have another update because he's in jail. Well, I would like an update. I would like an update. Colorado.

1:53:00I'm going to get a fucking letter from jail. I don't know. I see you on that Reddit podcast, bitch. I don't know if that's the craziest thing to come out of Denver, but that's okay. No, I don't know. What is Denver? What have they done lately? I think everyone that lives there is just like a little weird. Yeah. Like in a good way. Like in a good way. Yeah, no, I love Denver. Some of my best friends live there and they are. Okay. Are they a little weird? Everyone's a little weird. Would they all dress up in a... They would not do this. No, no, no. know but um i would actually like though a conclusive update of that just to know like we good yeah she she good is she good are you out there i don't want to hear from him i don't give a fuck about him anymore just if you're out there i bet her side of the story is also like even crazier oh well because even on that second update when he went to the barbecue to apologize she had said to him i've given you a million chances you know what else did he do what else I'd like to know.

1:54:00Okay. That is all for the stories. We are ending on this story. It's actually coming from a comment and I've, I've read this in the past, but I think with everything going on, I just like really want to end on this like super positive note and just like for people that like just feels lost in the sauce of what's going on right now, that there is like a lot of positivity and hope in humanity. So this is coming from an ask Reddit that's 15 years old. Again, some of you are going to remember this story. It was a person posting, have you ever picked up a hitchhiker? And the top comment has since gone ultimate Reddit hall of fame.

1:54:46Okay. Viral. It is just cemented. It's coming from a user that it's R-H-O-N-E-R. I would assume it's Roner. Just about every time I see someone, I stop. I kind of got out of the habit the last couple of years, moved to a big city and all that. My girlfriend wasn't too stoked on the practice. Then some shit happened to me that changed me, and I'm back to offering rides habitually. If you would indulge me, it is a long story that has almost nothing to do with hitchhiking other than happening on the road. This past year, I have had three instances of car trouble. A blowout on a freeway, a bunch of blown fuses, and an out-of-gas situation.

1:55:28All of them while driving other people's cars, which, for some reason, makes it worse on an emotional level. It makes it worse on a practical level as well. What with the fact that I carry things like a jack and extra fuses in my car and know enough not to park facing downhill on a steep incline with less than a gallon of fuel. Anyways, each of these times this shit happened, I was disgusted with how people would not bother to help me. I spent hours on the side of the freeway waiting, watching roadside assistance vehicles blow by me, just waiting for AAA to show. The four gas stations I asked for a gas can at told me they couldn't loan them out for my safety, but I could buy a really shitty one-gallon one with no cap for$15.

1:56:18It was enough each time to make you say shit like, quote, this country is going to hell in a handbasket. But you know who came to my rescue all three times? Immigrants. Mexican immigrants. None of them spoke a lick of the language, but one of those dudes had a profound effect on me. He was the guy that stopped to help me with a blowout with his whole family of six in tow. I was on the side of the road for close to four hours. Big Jeep, blown rear tire, had a spare, but no jack. I had signs in the windows of the car, big signs that said, need a jack. And I offered money. No dice. Right as I am about to give up and just hitch out of there, a van pulls over and a dude bounds out.

1:57:07He sizes the situation up and calls for his youngest daughter who speaks English. He conveys through her that he has a jack, but it is too small for the jeep, so we will need to brace it. He produces a saw from the van and cuts a log out of a downed tree on the side of the road. We rolled it over, put his jack on top, and bam, in business. I started taking the wheel off, and if you can believe it, it broke his tire iron. It was one of those collapsible ones, and I wasn't careful, and I snapped the head I needed clean off. Fuck. No worries. He runs to the van, gives it to his wife, and she's gone in a flash, down the road to buy a tire iron.

1:57:51She's back in 15 minutes. We finish the job with a little sweat and cussing. Stupid log was starting to give. And I am a very happy man. We are both filthy and sweaty. The wife produces a large water jug for us to wash our hands in. I tried to put a 20 in the man's hand, but he wouldn't take it. So I instead gave it to his wife as quietly as I could. I thanked them up one side and down the other. I asked the little girl where they lived, thinking maybe I could send them a gift for being so awesome. She says they live in Mexico. They are here so mommy and daddy can pick peaches for the next few weeks.

1:58:27After that, they're going to pick cherries and then go back home. She asks if I've had lunch and when I told her no, she gave me a tamale from their cooler, the best fucking tamale I've ever had. So to clarify, a family that is undoubtedly poorer than you, me, and just about everyone else on that stretch of road, working on a seasonal basis where time is money, took an hour or two out of their day to help some strange dude on the side of the road when people in tow trucks were just passing me by. Wow. But we aren't done yet. I thank them again and walk back to my car and open the foil on the tamale because I'm starving at this point.

1:59:09And what do I find inside? My fucking$20 bill. I whirl around and run up to the van and the guy rolls his window down. He sees the 20 in my hand and just shaking his head no, like he won't take it. All I can think to say is, por favor, por favor, por favor, with my hands out. Dude just smiles, shakes his head, and with what looked like great concentration, tried his hardest to speak to me in English. Quote, today you, tomorrow me. He rolled up his window, drove away, his daughter waving to me in the rearview mirror. I sat in my car eating the best fucking tamale of all time and I just cried like a little girl.

1:59:57It's been a rough year and nothing has broke my way. This was sort of left field I just couldn't deal. In the five months since, I've changed a couple of tires, given a few rides to gas stations, and once went 50 miles out of my way to get a girl to an airport. I won't accept money every time I tell them the same thing when we are through. Today, you, tomorrow, me. Oh, I hear the tears. I know. I really tried to keep it together this time. No, you did really good. You did really good. I think I read that the first time and I don't know how I got through it. Just a reminder. Yeah, I was like, I don't even know what to say.

2:00:37That's just a reminder. First of all, again, just like go out and do something good. Call your senators, call your representatives. There are so many bills that are going through right now that need attention. There is a bill that is going to give ICE more funding. funding where they will get almost a billion dollars for bonuses what the fuck it's 42 000 dollars for every ice employee as a bonus call your representatives i know it seems futile and like like it doesn't matter but it really does and there's so many ways to get involved there's another bill that is rolling back protections of protected waters in Minnesota.

2:01:23And it's so a Chilean company can come in and mine our minerals and send it to China for processing. There's no clean, safe way to harvest that. It will pollute our water source. Oh, for sure. It's another bill that is going to the Senate right now. So like call your representatives, get involved on that note january has some amazing bonus content on patreon head over there i'm gonna get back to the free stories so come join us but other than that hoof hoof but also what a great update episode it was really good really good i hope you guys enjoyed and again sorry for getting back on the soapbox no no we need it we need it we do need it So stay safe.

2:02:13Thank you all for being here. And until next time. Bye. Bye, guys.

2:02:45Fall never arrives all at once. First the air, then the light. And slowly the things you love begin to find each other. A jacket meets a dress. A hoodie slips beneath a blazer. An old cap finds a new scarf. Because you don't simply step into the season. You create it layer by layer until it finally feels like fall. Find fall your way at Ross. This episode is brought to you by ChatGPT. Hey, it's Bill Simmons from the Bill Simmons Podcast. Have you guys heard about ChatGPT work? It's the new way to use ChatGPT for bigger multi-step projects. And when you need more than just answers, give ChatGPT work access to your apps and files and it can create real work documents like spreadsheets, slides, and structured reports.

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