259: A Rare Breed..

31:35Me. So do you have to take Xanax slash melatonin every night? Him. For the past two months, yeah. I don't take melatonin. It really doesn't do anything. Me. So just Xanax. Him. Yeah, but it's actually working, so after the race, I'm just going to take it as needed. You can't take that stuff forever. Me. Yeah, I was about to say it's bad to take for a long time, so it's making you loopy? I'm just using it to fix my circadian rhythm. Sleep is really important in my non-board certified medical opinion. I mean, it depends on a lot of factors. How much I've eaten, if I'm tired, etc. But yeah, sometimes.

32:13Me. Interesting. Well, I don't know if we should be hooking up if you're taking meds that mess with you like that, because that kind of blurs the lines of consent, you know? Him. I mean, I don't want to make you feel like you're taking advantage of me because you're not. And two, I don't have to take the medication. It's just a sleep aid. Me. Yeah, I know. But if it's making you loopy slash talk a certain way, that's kind of concerning, you know? Well, I totally shouldn't drink on them. I will say that. I mean, I'm just taking Xanax derivative for a short term to fix my sleep schedule. It's not like I'm taking some antipsychotic.

32:45Me. Yeah, it's really bad to drink on them. And okay, well, I just haven't heard of Xanax being prescribed for sleep, but I'm just cautious because I have a friend who had problems with it. It's not Xanax. It's a benzodiazepine. Me. Okay. And that's the end of our combo as of now. At this point, I'm just super curious as to if he actually has a fetish or if it's just something innocent and he's embarrassed. So it's just a very odd situation. I would really like to get to the bottom of this and I'm planning on seeing him Wednesday night to discuss things further unless something happens between now and then.

33:18We'll keep you updated. Is that it? That's all. we got. I'm kind of confused how she like deleted everything and then posted it again with this update. This update doesn't feel that profound. I guess it's kind of adding more to the context of like, oh, is he doing this baby voice because he's taking a medication and like it's altering how he's acting? Or is there more here? What's the timeline from the update? like is he still talking baby talk for after the conversation for how long like I'm just trying to get that timeline straight now or like is she now just worried about the like use of Xanax so original post was April 27th the other update like the latest one is April 29th so it's all just in the span of a couple days yeah hasn't even seen him again since addressing it in a text conversation.

34:20Okay. But someone did respond or like comment to OP and was like, at a certain point, you need to stop asking strangers on the internet and make a decision. Yeah. And OP was like, you're right. I'm just going to delete this soon and break it off. I mean, bottom line, if something weirds you out, it gives you the ick, it weirds you out. For sure. If you find early on that like stuff someone's starting to tell you just isn't adding up, they're probably making stuff up or like they're proving that they can't really be trusted so it's better to get out early than two years down the road when you find out oh no they've been lying to me this whole time and have another life or no he never had xanax and melatonin he was blah blah blah like i don't know i've had like the craziest lies like ever told like i've we've talked about this in the past of like a guy who pretended he was in this band and would like like download the music of this band and then like save it as his own like you know back when like LimeWire or like downloading things legally was a big thing yeah and he would download it and be like yeah this is my band and then it was like literally a popular band on the radio I don't I don't think you've told me that oh god I could have swore we've talked about it on the the early days of this maybe It's been a while But yeah That's that guy Yeah Baby voice Baby voice I'd love to hear everyone's icks though Give me the What's yours?

35:50Do you have one that comes to mind? I don't really like men's feet in the thong type sandals The flip flops Okay I like them in like the slides But a flip flop There's something about a dude in a flip flop And then just like flip flops when they squeak and they're wet and it's a dude and it's just like i don't know okay i don't nothing's really coming to mind though like that's that's so even the flip-flop thing i'm like that's dumb no no that's a good one what's yours i don't know if this counts but like i hate sharing ice cream like i don't want to have like especially like a spoon like if somebody wants to share a spoon with ice cream and then they like lick it off and then there's still some like ice cream and spit in the spoon and then like they expect me to use that get that away from me but like i mean if anyone's listened long enough they know that i have like a weird thing with like spit like yeah bodily fluids bodily fluids not where they not in the waist or inside you you know anywhere in between freaks me out oh my gosh oh yeah the flip-flops oh what else that spit flip-flops and fluids.

37:07Ew! Speaking of fluids, this next one is coming from Am I the Asshole, just two days old at this point. My, 35 female, partner, 40 male, peed in a mug and I was horrified. Oh my god. Am I the asshole for how I reacted? Wait, how did this just line up so perfectly? It's like almost like we rehearsed this. I have a way. Did you move the stories around or was it just that perfect? It was already in that order of tabs. I'm still a bit shocked to be honest, so I will try to be as brief as possible. I'm really looking for some outside perspective because I don't know if I'm being unreasonable and difficult here or if this is objectively messed up.

37:52My partner came back home for lunch. He went into the kitchen and said something like, I need to pee. As he was walking away to go upstairs, I asked him to slide his shoes off because we had new carpets put down. He then came back and said, forget it. I don't have time. Took a mug with leftover coffee in it and peed into it in the kitchen right next to me, sort of laughing. I was just stunned. He kept laughing and saying, I told you I really needed it. And I just stared, I think with the sheer horror on my face. He then poured the piss out into the sink. The sink was empty and thoroughly cleaned the mug.

38:32I said to him not to bother because I want that cup in a bin. He then started to get annoyed and said, don't be like that. I told you I needed it. I said to him that by the time he came back to the kitchen, he could have slid his shoes off and had been upstairs in the bathroom. He then said, quote, you had to ruin my lunch and probably the weekend. Why do you always have to be such a drama queen? You make me feel like an absolute piece of shit. I barely said anything because I was absolutely shocked and disgusted. I was trying to explain why I was so disgusted, but he just kept interrupting and saying, do you know how much I needed it?

39:11In the end, I was just quiet and he left. I don't know what to think. Am I the asshole here? He is pretty convinced that it was nothing and I've made him feel like crap about it. Is this normal behavior? Have I overreacted and made him feel bad for no reason. I mean, you know my take. I'm still shook that like my comment led so well into this story. But yeah, I mean, I pretty much already said how I feel about it. No, I'm repulsed. And I'm also annoyed that he's now putting it on her because it's like, no, you're being gross and then you're making her feel bad for her valid reaction and like guilting her about it.

39:54I don't know. I guess for people who don't care about stuff like this if you guys have that relationship and you think it's funny Like go for it. This is a personal problem for me specifically because of my Like yeah, I would even I would even say it's like past the ick it like makes me actually my my partner Took a sip of what he thought was water And it wasn't I don't know what it was but he spit it back out and And even that like made me start gagging. And he knows that about me. So I was like, why would you do that in front of me? I'm like, get out of here. And that's more of a reasonable reaction, right?

40:33That he did. But he knows that about me that that's not a thing that I'm okay with. So I don't know what their dynamic is or what anyone is. Maybe they're okay with that type of stuff. But like she's not. And that's okay that she's not. It's a pretty normal thing to be grossed out by, I would say. Maybe that's just me. It just feels really rude and disrespectful. And it's like right next to me, like I'm in the kitchen. You pick up a coffee cup that has coffee in it. Yeah. Like was it hers that she was drinking? Yeah. And then I'm like, is this a power move? You pee in the coffee mug and then pour it down the sink.

41:06Why not just piss in the sink? I'm just like, it just overall feels weird and really gross. But I'm also like, how did you know that you didn't have more pee than what was in that coffee cup? Like, what if you had to pee and it started overflowing the cup? Whoa. now we're thinking. And then you got piss on the floor. Like, it just feels so unnecessary than, like, slip your shoes off and, like, I don't know if he has, like, work boots on. Just, like, it feels so immature and just icky and, no, I don't think you're overreacting. And then I completely agree. I think there's probably maybe a bigger problem with his reaction to all of this and the fact that it's, like, you're a drama queen.

41:47You ruined the weekend. You always do this. blah blah blah it's like why yeah very immature unhealthy response to a normal request of like hey please pee in the toilet next time right I and I I guess I will give a little bit of slack though because I'm like there's been times where I genuinely feel like I'm going to pee my pants and like if that's what we're dealing with then mate like I don't know maybe there was just like I was literally going to pee my pants and now you're making me feel bad for already being in a really vulnerable position. So maybe there was some of that going on. And like, so I guess I'll give some slack there.

42:25I don't, you know. Either way. Whatever. Not the asshole. Yeah. At least that's my take. Yeah. Top comment. Not the asshole. This is disgusting. And he did it to prove a point in the most asshole way possible. Does he even like you? Because it doesn't sound like it. Agreed. Does he even like his spouse? Because damn. Next comment. I don't know, man. I'm a guy. I'd go outside and pee if the toilet is busy. And I really, really need to go. Would I pee in the sink? Maybe. I certainly wouldn't go around and laugh about it. In a mug? That's frigging insane. Question from a woman. Would a mug even hold all of the piss if you really had to go that bad?

43:06Which was like my exact thoughts. He's got to go that bad. His bladder's ready to burst. Like, even if you go to a doctor and like pee in a cup at the doctor, that thing like fills up pretty quick yeah right and then you're still going valid points all around i know and so someone goes as a dude i think a regular pee would overflow a mug let alone if i really had to go and someone goes not to mention the splash there's no way that didn't splash true gross i'm just thinking about people's streams like obviously they splash up and out of the toilet that's why like it's like hitting his face in the wind as a piss face i have talked to so poor attitude and a piss poor face literally and like i think it's interesting for like new parents i've been talking about this a lot with people where they're they're just teaching their sons to sit on the toilet and that's just normal like they're not really gonna like well i always wonder if people sit or stand on the plane because and that's why the floor is wet that's what no because you also get water all over the place from washing your hands that's also very yeah that happens but like i mean but i'm like i was on a lot of planes like it's it's but you weren't in the stall with them no but you had to clean like if the bathrooms were super untidy on the flight people would be like oh the bathrooms and you had to go clean as a flight attendant we don't have mops on those planes you should you should invest in a mop on those planes my planes we didn't have a mop so you'd put a glove on paper towel the floor yeah paper towel didn't come up white clear it was yellow oh like that's piss on the ground yeah that's gross yeah maybe a little water but i think maybe um start sitting down on the plane please i know for everyone's benefit just crazy but um no actually why why is it why is it that it's normal for guys to like is there a better is it like a healthier way i mean i don't know maybe it's just the evolution of toileting because people used to have chamber pots yeah so obviously it was easier for a dude to just and then there's a chamber pot and go into it versus sit and hover on it like a woman and in that china airport that we were in that had just like the hole in the ground and like i just like had to stand over it and i was like what's going on remember yeah you're in the stall next to me and you had like the like you had a toilet that was above ground and I was like how's it going in there and you're like fine and I was like how do I do this I know just an open hole in the floor yeah latrine yeah um yeah it's it's kind of deeply ingrained social norms it's often perceived as being a more masculine behavior though urologists sometimes recommend sitting for better bladder emptying it's also better for your pelvic floor oh you know what I want to get is one of those little squatty potties yeah where you put your feet up because apparently that's supposed to be like good for you getting things all lined up and going yeah i have really bad posture i'm like i need to get that sports bra that everyone's been talking about i've never heard of that pulls your shoulders back i love that idea reminds you about good posture it honestly feels unnatural for me to put my shoulders back very unnatural which makes me feel like i really need to do something about that because I have back pain in my like left shoulder blade at all times.

46:30Oh my gosh. Yeah. So if anyone has recommendations for that, send them Lauren's way. Let me know. Yeah. Do we have any like updates or comments? No. A couple comments from OP. He was coming home for work. 100 % not drunk. I would never let a dog lick my plate. That's also disgusting. They sniff and lick shit all the time. Why would anyone let them do that and then eat from that plate. I do let dogs fully lick my entire face though. So that's one thing. I love animals, but I don't like, I don't like dog slobber, but I will let a horse lick me. So make that make sense. Well, cause you're really connected to horses, but that's again, that's why I feel I'm connected to my dogs.

47:13I don't know. I feel like, I don't know. Horses just eat grass. Yeah. Maybe that's is the like vegetarian in them and dogs are more like meat eaters i'm an irrational person i don't know i'm like you know what i mean like it's like i have self-awareness we're all a little goofy again rare breed um so i don't know but i love my puppies yeah i don't know like i've i know that a lot of people find it gross and a lot of people's people will like yell at their dog when it's licking my face but I'm just like la la la la la unfazed unless I'm going out and I don't want them to take my makeup off because sometimes they'll like lick my eyeball and I'm like don't do that that's that's gonna get mascara all over the place you let them lick your eyeballs well no that's where the boundary starts is what I'm saying oh my god that's so wild okay let's move on to this next one since we don't have an update or anything else that's fun to share This is coming from r slash amithejerk, 21 days old.

48:16Am I the jerk for not telling my wife for eight years that the coffee she thinks she hates is the coffee she drinks every morning? Hmm. This sounds sneaky. Let's get into it. My wife is going to read this eventually, so hi babe, I'm sorry, but also I'm not. When we first moved in together, my wife told me she only likes light roast coffee. She said dark roast is too bitter and too strong and she can't stand it. She was very firm about this, so I always bought light roast for the house. About eight years ago, I accidentally bought a bag of dark roast. Didn't realize it until I got home and saw the label.

48:54I figured I'd just drink it myself and get her the right one next time, but I was lazy and I made a pot that morning anyways. She drank it. She said nothing, didn't notice at all, said it was good, actually. So the next time I went to the store, I bought dark roast again, on purpose this time. She drank it every morning for a week and never said a word. So I just kept buying it for eight years. Every morning, this woman drinks dark roast coffee and tells me how good it is. Meanwhile, if we go to a coffee shop and they ask what roast she wants, she says light because she doesn't like dark. She has sent back coffee at restaurants for being too dark.

49:36She has told friends she can't drink dark roast, all while drinking it at home every single day. Last month, she was putting groceries away and actually looked at the coffee bag for the first time in apparently eight years. This is crazy. She held it up and said, is this dark roast? I said, yep. She said, since when? I said, since 2017. She did not laugh. She said, I lied to her. I said, I just never corrected her. She said, that's the same thing. I said, you've literally been drinking it every day and loving it for eight years, so clearly you do like dark roast. She said, that's not the point.

50:19She's been buying her own light roast since and making a separate pot every morning. She says it's better. I watch her face when she drinks it and I'm pretty sure she doesn't think it's better, but she's committed to proving me wrong. Am I the jerk? Um, I mean, a little bit. Like it was eight years of, again, I don't think it's the same thing, but it is in the similar category, like lying by omission. I know and a lot of people would be like but it's just about coffee but I'm like It's not yeah I mean it's it's a it's an innocent one right It's not like crazy but at the same time no one likes feeling like they're getting like Bamboozled A fast one pulled over them Yeah for like specifically eight years By your husband Yeah I can't like I can't I could do that for like maybe eight days or maybe eight hours Like you know what I mean like I don't know how people just like Keep it up Yeah like that So to me, that's what I would kind of be startled by is like, how did you not?

51:22How did you not notice? Couldn't you like after a week be like, what did you think of the coffee? And then let me know. Like, see, you do like it. Like, the fact that it went on for eight years is kind of a little impressive. It's impressive, but that's why it's also a little concerning. A little wrong. I know. Do you think you wanted the satisfaction of being like, you've been drinking it for eight years? Like, just that I got you? satisfaction no i think it sounds more like a lazy thing like he's like well it's what i prefer and she doesn't mind it so i'm just gonna keep going with my routine until she says something which that just so happened to be eight years later i don't think that it was like a i'm trying to mess with you yeah yeah that's how it reads from my point of view like specifically because like just knowing like my dad, I could see my dad, I could see my dad in a situation like this just out of pure routine, right?

52:22Like you see that there's nothing wrong. So you keep up with your routine. Well, it also kind of begs the question of like, what you don't know doesn't hurt you a little bit. There's certain things about this where like people really stick to their beverages and they think like, oh no, I know the difference between a diet Coke and a Coke zero. and like I only drank this one and then they do like a blind taste test and it's like oh that's not Diet Coke that's Coke Zero see and so I think that concept of like how an expectation of what you're drinking can mess with you is really interesting and it's something that comes up in the comments so the top comment is she sent back coffee at restaurants for being too dark while drinking dark roast at home every morning for eight years that's not a taste preference that's a belief system yeah right and someone comments under it to be fair this just proves how much expectations affect taste if you think you hate something you will convince yourself you do unless no one tells you yeah yeah it's interesting experiment so are they in a bad place now or is he just kind of like i mean he started off saying like hi honey i know you'll see this right so i think it's light-hearted yeah there's no update on it op has since deleted their account the post was removed she was like delete that op yeah yeah take that down yeah but that's all that's all he wrote do is anyone having like wild comments that are things that didn't cross our minds let's sort the comments by controversial um someone goes i think you guys should work on your communication not the jerk i would grin like the joker watching her stubbornly drink her light roast and ask her how's the coffee now that she knows someone responds to that and goes sounds like you guys all hate your wives yeah someone goes your wife is pathetic geez someone else says this is hilarious my wife is as stubborn as yours about preconceived food and beverage choices.

54:29God forbid that she should ever have to drink a Diet Dr. Pepper rather than a Diet Coke. You'd think that it would kill her. Dr. Pepper's so good, though. I've done some sneaky food stuff to her over the years, but I've never pulled a long con like this. Well done. You guys are weirdos. And that makes me, now I'm like, I don't want him to have this satisfaction. I don't, yeah. And that's why I think it did go on for so long. Maybe. And I think at first you, hey, you're at the store, you buy the wrong one. Okay. But like you continued to go out and buy that one after you kind of pulled it over on her.

55:05At some point within eight years, it has to just go over your head. Yeah. Like I really, I can't imagine each time he goes to the grocery store, he was like, he, he, he, pulling a fast one. Like I feel like it's got to just kind of become a part of your routine. Yeah. and I think that the people in there are laughing because they've had things that are similar and they're like wow king like you did the ultimate heist for eight years but I I don't feel like that was just his no and at the end of the day like I don't think this is really about the coffee yeah it's about the overall you've bamboozled me right and maybe as silly as it might seem like she just feels kind of betrayed.

55:52Yeah. Like a little just like, oh, like you don't, I don't know. Like, I wonder if you would start to feel like you don't respect me. You've been like bamboozling me for eight years and like making me drink something I didn't like. And I know, obviously she must've liked it because she continued to drink it for eight years or on the flip side of this, she's over there like, oh, he makes me this coffee every day and I don't really like it but I drink it because he made it for me and he loves me and you know what I mean like on the flip side like we have these two different realities like what one is she living is she living in one where she takes a sip thank you honey and then pours it out and goes and gets another coffee that would be crazy like somewhere else like can you imagine if we got the other side of it I doubt it though but you never know yeah a lot of people then get into a lie by omission is still a lie.

56:42You lied to her every time she took a sip. I'd be mad too. I'd get over it quickly. But the level of anger would be immense. A short burst of how dare he. So yeah, you're a jerk for lying to her. She's a jerk for not admitting she likes the coffee, assuming she does like it. She may have just thought you weren't good at making coffee and was too sweet to say anything to you. So maybe, you know, he said she'll see it. Maybe we get the other side. Yeah. Let's go, coffee girl. Were you pouring it down the drain every day? Were you pissing in it like the last guy? Gross. Okay, moving along. This episode is brought to you by Credit Karma.

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58:36I'm so curious what you think of this one because it's also kind of a little bit on the lying track. So it's coming from Am I Overreacting titled, am I overreacting for calling off my engagement after my fiancé admitted his family secretly tested me to see if I was a gold digger? I, 24 female, have been with my fiancé, 27 male, for almost four years. He has a really well-paying job in tech, and I make pretty average money. We've always split things fair, and I've never asked him for expensive stuff or trips or anything. I honestly thought money was a non-issue for us. I never was interested in him for his money anyways.

59:20We genuinely clicked so well, and I loved his personality. We are into the same nerdy things, and his family seemed to really like me. I never thought I would have to worry about our relationship going south until now. A few days ago, my fiancé sat me down and said he had something he wanted to tell me, and he was smiling like it was good news. He basically told me that his family has been secretly testing me for the last 11 months to make sure I wasn't a gold digger. He said they were worried I only liked him for his income and wanted proof before we got married. The test was that they all made it seem like he was struggling financially and might lose his job.

1:00:02His mom would casually bring up layoffs, his dad talked about how unstable tech is, and slowly it turned into, he might actually lose his job, and you guys might have to really downsize. At one point, his mom even told me I should be prepared to financially help him if it came to that. I never wanted to bring up the possibility of a layoff to him because I didn't want to stress him out. I wanted to be prepared to support him if needed. So I started budgeting more, saving money, cutting back on random spending, skipping stuff that I wanted, and just generally trying to prepare for the worst. I constantly reassured my fiance, encouraged him, told him we'd be fine, that I didn't care about money, and that I just wanted us.

1:00:49But this whole thing was fake. His job was never in danger. his income never changed. There were no layoffs. His family literally planned this whole thing together. They kept it going for almost a year. Wow. Subtle comments made him passing to manipulate me and test me. Apparently, this all started because his older brother went through a really messy divorce. His brother now pays a ton in child support, and his ex-wife got a lot of money in the divorce, and his family fully blames her and thinks she was a gold digger. So now they're super paranoid about any woman who dates one of their sons. The thing is, I've actually met his brother's ex-wife before.

1:01:33She was dropping off the kids at a family night, and she seemed really nice and normal. I never once got gold digger vibes from her, and honestly makes me uncomfortable how much they demonize her. My fiancé said that his parents finally told him that I passed, and that they felt comfortable with him marrying me now. He said he wanted to tell me because he thought I would be relieved to know he actually isn't struggling financially and that it shows how much his family cares about protecting him. Then he tells me that to celebrate, he upgraded our honeymoon to a nice luxury resort in Hawaii. I mentioned this resort when initially honeymoon planning, but deemed it too expensive, so settled for a more modest option.

1:02:15but I feel weird about it. I don't want to be rewarded for being manipulated really well. Like, good job, we tricked you and you were so gullible you believed it. Here's a nicer vacation. I told him I felt manipulated, embarrassed, and honestly humiliated that his whole family was watching my reactions and judging my character behind my back for almost a year. He said I'm looking at it wrong and that I proved I'm not with him for his money and that should make me feel more secure in our relationship. I wish I could ask my family what they thought, but unfortunately, my mom passed away two years ago, and I don't have a relationship with my father.

1:02:53I'm feeling sad and lost because I don't have a reliable second opinion to lean on. His family had become my family. That's what makes this even harder. His family is acting like this is totally normal and that I should be proud of myself. His mom literally said, quote, most girls wouldn't have handled that so gracefully. I told him I need space and I'm seriously considering calling off the engagement, but I honestly don't know what to do. I love him and this is so out of left field. Now everyone is acting like I'm blowing this out of proportion and being dramatic. A part of me wonders if I am, but another part of me feels like my trust is completely broken.

1:03:34Am I overreacting? I'm not sure if tests like this are normal. I feel weird about it. I don't know. Please help. I mean they're not normal and no and she has a right to feel like everything that she's describing yeah I I do however though I I haven't been in a place where I have that amount of money I have that amount of fame I have that amount of anything where I feel like somebody might be using me so like I don't really know what like what that feels like and what that experience is so as much as I'm on her side and agree with how she's that what happened was really messed up I also don't feel like I have that much room to speak on what it feels like to question if somebody's only with you because of money like I don't know what that would feel like so again it was it was wrong I just don't know I don't know how I don't know I guess like the thing is though I'm very curious his involvement me too that's what because at first I thought he wasn't involved at all and then you said that he was like oh congratulations so I'm like did he find out at the end that's what I'm like it's somewhat unclear right my fiance said his parents finally told him that I passed but did he know about it from the start yeah because on the flip side too like your parents are essentially telling you like sweetie she's not actually in love with you she's only with you for the money let's make sure like your parents are also kind of like giving you this like kind of like backhanded thing as well like it it feels really icky i do think it was wrong does feel icky i think if you're worried about finances like there's things like a prenup that would like Protect your assets and your Your wealth pre-marriage So I don't think you need to Pull a year-long Manipulative Lying heist On someone and the fact too She was like I really cut back On budgeting did things that I Would want to do like that that That sucks yeah And what if her friends went on a girls trip And she didn't and she didn't go exactly And a whole year of that No it's it's pretty messed up I don't know.

1:05:56This one's such an interesting one that we haven't come across anything. No, it is like a very rare breed of people. Like it's a very unique problem. Right. Yeah. And it's like, I wonder why they didn't think like a prenup. I wonder why that was the... I will say though... Maybe culture, maybe geographically, like what part of the world are they in? Yeah. I will say though, one of the things was like, it feels weird to know that they were all like judging each of my answers and stuff like that. and I mean the family's doing that regardless yeah but it but it's even weirder when they're like all in on it because of a specific reason but like even if they weren't all communicating on it like they're still making these judgments in their head based off of your responses to things so but no it's it's it's really weird and that's that's how I'll that's what I'm gonna run with is that it's really weird and I don't really know I don't know the advice to give her like Like, I guess, what would you, I'm curious to hear what advice you would tell her to move forward with.

1:06:58I think you just have to go based on how you're feeling. You know, if you love this person so much and you want to get past this, then you have to have a conversation of like, we are going to have stronger boundaries with your parents going forward. Like, there's no more tests. And I also think it would really depend on how involved he was in this. If he was also involved in this and making these comments too of like, oh, I might get laid off and like also in on this scheme, then I don't think I could move forward with someone like that. It would be really tough. It would feel like it's like the Truman show where it's like, what is my reality?

1:07:40Totally. If going forward, it's like, oh, I have a health scare. I had a health thing come up. Right. Can you even believe that? Or are you testing me to see if I'll leave? It's a crazy thing to cry wolf for an entire year because how do you build trust on top of that? A year. How do you – Not just a couple months. Not like a conversation to see how she'd take it. Right. A year. And you make such a good point. It's like how can she trust him moving forward or any of them? Like, yeah, again, if he says I have a health scare, is she going to now question it? Like are you testing me or anything else that pops up?

1:08:18Or maybe maybe he really is about to get laid off and now she doesn't trust him. So it definitely is a really good way to break trust completely. So if he was in on it, that that would be difficult. I would say, like, if you guys have a strong bond outside of that, then like, you know, maybe try going to couples therapy and and seeing if you can work through it. But again, you know, relationships are about that trust and about vulnerability. So unfortunately, like that's we do get into relationships where we trust people and they betray us and we have to deal with it. But to test them up front and like not trust them up front and then betray them and like ruin the trust.

1:09:03that's that's not how you should start a relationship that's not how you build a relationship so it it's really like they kind of screwed themselves over there that family and and him if he was involved the entire time but it's really what she feels yeah we do have a comment too someone says you'd think in real life they would have just asked you to do a prenup right again like my first thought op says the thing is we have literally discussed a prenup and I've agreed to it. I asked about this when he confessed and he said that the testing was to make sure I'm a morally good person and valued him outside of his money and that he wasn't afraid of divorce necessarily.

1:09:44I feel hurt that he would even question my morality in the first place. I've never given the impression that I'm shallow. It all feels off to me. I would feel getting worse. Yeah, no, I mean, I would feel the same way as her. But again, And I don't know what he's been through that has made him come to these places because I'm not rich enough to be in that mindset. So I don't know what he's thinking. The top comment on this one. In their effort to prove you are a morally decent person, they proved that they are not. And then next comment. They thought she wasn't good enough for him. They're not good enough for her.

1:10:25Since they've made it very clear that his entire family, him included, is willing to conspire behind her back, lie to and manipulate her, yeah You've found one massive flaw in his personality and it's absolutely one I'd consider a deal breaker So I'm getting the vibe, I mean everyone's kind of assuming he is deeply involved And based on the morality thing, it seems like he did at least agree to this Yeah It's such a bummer So we get an update You guys ready? I feel like there was such an underwhelming response. We've got an update. Oh, by me? Yeah. I'm just still in my head over this whole situation.

1:11:04One more time. One more time. We've got an update. Yay. I'm really sorry. I've never posted on Reddit before. I've always just kind of lurked. I wasn't sure how I'm supposed to give an update. I replied to a comment, but I didn't know if that was correct. So here is the update. Thank you all for your comments. It means a lot to have so much support and validation. I knew right away deep down that this was wrong, but I needed validation as bad as that sounds. I don't have close family or many friends, so hearing that my feelings are normal makes me feel less alone. This happened a couple of days ago and I'm still staying with my fiance right now, but things are tense and I feel anxious pretty much all of the time.

1:11:41He knows I'm upset and knows I need space, so he hasn't tried to talk about it since. He knows I'm considering calling off the engagement, which is why I think he's been so sensitive around me the last couple of days. He hasn't been acting like it's a positive thing anymore and seems pretty remorseful since I told him how much it hurt me. This morning, I asked him if he knew about it the whole time, and he told me that his parents started making comments without his knowledge, and after he overheard a comment they made to me while over at his parents' house, he asked them privately why they said that, and they explained that they were testing me.

1:12:17He decided to let them continue just to see what I would do. hmm not good from past interactions with his parents i also know he has a hard time standing up to them or disagreeing with them so it honestly makes sense that he didn't call them out and just started going along with it they told him that they were offended when i suggested an expensive resort for the honeymoon and made a comment insinuating that his parents would be paying for it they got it in their head that i just expected them to shoulder the cost of an expensive resort without question, which isn't true. I happily accepted a more modest option when they suggested it because I don't want to seem pushy or entitled.

1:12:56Plus, typically the groom's family pays for the honeymoon, so I didn't know they were offended by that. Maybe I really did come off as entitled, but that was honestly never my intention. Regardless, I don't think that justifies testing me like this. He wasn't the mastermind, but he never stopped them and didn't see why it was wrong or manipulative until I told him I was upset. And part of me wonders if he was manipulated by his parents to think this was acceptable. I'm torn between calling it off or having a conversation with him and asking him to go to couples counseling and set some serious boundaries with his parents.

1:13:29Yeah. I also see some suggestions recommending that I talk to his brother's ex-wife. I think that's a good idea, but I'm honestly really nervous about it. I don't have her number, but I follow her on Instagram, so I'm considering DMing her and asking to call her. I'm pretty overwhelmed with the attention that this post is getting, but I'm super appreciative for everyone's support and love. I think I have realized I have a people-pleasing tendency and a need to keep the peace, but I'm trying to force myself to break out of that. It's all just really scary and I feel really lonely. My natural inclination is to forgive and forget so I can still have a family.

1:14:04I know that's not the best idea. I know change needs to happen. I'm still figuring out where to go from here. I'm sorry this post is so long, I tried to add my update to a new post, but the mods removed it. I don't know why. Okay. Yeah. We got another update. Let's go. Update two. Well, my fiance found this post. Honestly, I feel pretty stupid for thinking he wouldn't find it. I didn't expect this post to get as much attention as it did. So thank you all for that. But I was extremely detailed, which was kind of dumb. He saw the post and immediately clocked that I wrote it. He came to me yesterday with the post and I was super afraid he would be angry, but he was actually very understanding.

1:14:48He said reading the comments was super eye-opening to him on just how messed up this situation was. I'm so glad. He feels bad that he ever even tried to spin this in a positive light. We had a pretty deep conversation and he came to realize that he has been manipulated very heavily by his parents and family. When his parents justify something, even if it's bad, his brain will immediately try to justify it too because differing opinions were not allowed in his household growing up. The whole situation has started the realization for him that he grew up in a manipulative and emotionally abusive household, but was never given space to realize it because they had an extreme us versus them mentality.

1:15:28So even when an extremely normal and well-intentioned person comes into the family, aka me and his brother's ex, they will do anything they can to invalidate their character because they are uncomfortable with outsiders. I've learned a lot about myself through this situation as well. First of all, I'm emotionally vulnerable and need therapy. Bad. My need to belong has caused me to stay in situations that are unhealthy for me just because I'm so desperate for a family. I know that's bad and I know it will be hard, but I want to change. With that being said, even though my fiance was very remorseful and apologetic, I told him I want to call off our wedding and take a break from our relationship.

1:16:08Good for her. We both have issues we need to work on by ourselves before we consider joining in marriage. I want to figure out who I am without someone to lean on, as painful as that may be. And he needs to seriously evaluate his relationship with his family and how they have affected him. Yeah. I told him that if in the future we find ourselves emotionally healthy and the timing works out, maybe we can be together again. I'm so proud of her. But for right now, that's not the case. So we need to go our separate ways. Oh my God. We still live together and I don't exactly have anywhere to go. So my fiance said he will move out and try to find other living arrangements.

1:16:46He will pay his portion of the lease until I find another roommate. Again, thank you all for your comments and support. The parents are like, gold digger. They mean a lot to me. Just kidding. that no truly that is such a beautiful wow that is hard that is hard to get to and I'm just so proud of her that she was like I need to make these decisions even though they're scary and foreign and hard and but she knew that was what was best and so wow that's that was a really great update. And again, like I know a lot of people probably would are probably yelling at me for even considering what the other people like what's going through their head.

1:17:31But now we kind of see this. It's like more of a glimpse into that. Yeah, you get more of a glimpse into it. And that's and that was my point is that like, I don't know what they're dealing. And again, that's it wasn't right what they did. I just don't know why they came to that, like what they've experienced. And And it's interesting because I've talked to people who have grown up with a lot of money. And that wasn't my case growing up. And when I grew up, I used to think that if my family and if I had more money, then like all these problems would be solved. And there is a lot of manipulation when there is a family with a lot of money.

1:18:07Like the parents will hold it over the children in so many ways. and like when you're a child growing up and then you just feel like oh okay I'm either out on the streets with nothing or I have all of this and they're constantly holding that over you that does something to you so yeah it's like until you're more established and on your own yeah but even when you are you have all of those years of like growing up as a child with with that type of like manipulation and so hearing this it's like I'm not surprised that that's like how he learned to operate and cope if his parents were constantly dangling money over him and that it just became normalized for him until he finally had to face the reality, which that's why I'm so happy he came across this post and read the comments and could actually see like this isn't normal and you do need to have boundaries and you do need to have get some help and you do need to, you know, figure out how to get emotionally healthy without leaning on your parents or accepting this poor behavior of of of them yeah this is this is a wild ride absolute wild ride and money can it can make a lot of things in life a lot easier it can also make things you didn't expect harder I it's interesting I feel like money just can be such a problem for families and especially when it's like with this one, this us versus everyone else mentality.

1:19:31It's almost giving like this inappropriate loyalty expectation and just like everyone's out to get us. Like all these new people. It's just like, oh, I bet the brother's relationship didn't work out because of the family, honestly. So really interesting. And I've kind of got another one that ties into it a little bit. This episode is brought to you by Cash App. I myself have fallen for a scam. Thought I was getting a really good deal on tickets and bam, I sent the money and I didn't get my tickets. There's so many common scams these days and finding all the red flags can be hard. That is where Cash App comes in.

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1:21:16Because family life isn't about the perfect moments. It's about making the most of any moment. Visit your local dealer or Chrysler.com to learn more and schedule a test drive today. Chrysler is a registered trademark of SCAUS LLC. This one is coming from r slash marriage. It's titled, my wife cannot get over the fact that my ex-wife is marrying a millionaire. Oh no. I don't know what has gone into my wife. When we met, I was still married to my ex-wife I'm not proud about it, but my wife started at our job and we slept together after a party That was about six years ago My ex found out when she saw nudes on my phone Brutal It broke her and ended our marriage I married my wife a year later Everything was fine and my children gradually forgave me and much of it was thanks to my ex who insisted that I was still their father and that I loved my children.

1:22:20Wow. They never liked my wife, however, because they've overheard her, my daughter did, talking badly about how fat and old their mother was and how she was no competition. Wow. Now my ex is happily engaged to a man who is very well off. My wife has been depressed ever since she heard that. What an actual... Bitch. Making comments about what he sees in her and how it wouldn't last. Oh my. I hate you. She has Googled everything about him, his net worth, property, social media accounts, and she doesn't stop talking about him. I'm so mad. I got very wary and this last week, she's been extra depressed and angry, not sleeping, and she cried several times.

1:23:09When she was finally taking a nap, I took her phone and saw that she has sent the new fiance some flirtatious text via Instagram. Oh my god, I was thinking this, but I didn't think that we, no, wow. And, and she even sent a nude. You are such a bitch. Wow. He only answered the first DMs when she introduced herself, congratulated him about the engagement, and told him that they were basically a family soon. When she was getting more flirtatious, he stopped answering, and her DMs were left on scene. This was last week. I called my ex-wife, and she confirmed that her fiancé has been receiving these texts, and they were embarrassed and unsure what to do, so they ignored her.

1:23:57I confronted my wife and she became very angry saying that I have embarrassed her by talking to my ex. She was crying when I told her that my ex was the one who suggested that they just ignore her and not say anything. Isn't that better for her? She admitted that she sent these but it was just because she felt my ex was a bitch that didn't deserve a fiance like hers with a lot of money. My ex-wife would be living in a 19th century penthouse. She also told me that I was the one who drove her to this since she's never felt won by me completely. Wow. That I married her after my divorce was a fact.

1:24:38I made her insecure. I don't understand. I thought we were happy that she was happy. She always told me how she loved me. I feel guilty like I have made her miserable and drove her to be this insecure. But at the same time, I'm very pissed. Well, yeah. There is another comment from OP that just says, I don't know if I need to put ages or if it's irrelevant. I'm 41. My wife is 33. Ex-wife is 43. Her fiance is 40 to 45. I'm not sure. So bit of an age gap there. They've been married for six years. So wife would have been around 27. at the time when she came on the scene. How does a person become like this horrific?

1:25:28I don't know what screw is loose in her head. And I'm like, is she obsessed with the ex-wife but plays it off as secretly hating her? I'm like, I just don't understand where it's like, you won, you stole her husband. And I know it takes two to tango. So he fucked it up as well by having an affair with this coworker. But it's like, you got him, but now you can't let her have anything. She can't have any nice shiny things. So you need to try to swoop in there and steal her fiance. Because if that guy would have been an asshole and started inappropriately messaging her back, she would have had an affair with him.

1:26:04Totally. So it's like, who are you obsessed with here? Are you obsessed with that ex-wife? Yeah. Or are you so deeply insecure and miserable that that's how you seek any... Validation? Yeah. Both. I think she's obsessed with the ex-wife. I'm actually kind of scared for the ex-wife. Yeah, and I think that she has zero self-worth, and so she's trying so hard to find validation in any horrible way possible. She might not have even liked this guy, and she might have just wanted to see if she could do it, like if she could steal him away. Insane. I mean, clearly she doesn't like her husband very much because she's doing this.

1:26:50I think she wants more. More what? Money, social status. I think she's now, like, I don't know, seeing this person and is like, well, if she can have him. I already stole one man from her. She doesn't deserve him. Like, how? Someone like him should be with me. That would be so messed up, though. like if the guy actually took the bait like is would you actually go forward and like date him marry him like wouldn't you feel like i think she would wouldn't you just how do you like you're always a second choice oh my god technically she well she's evil truly evil so someone goes so your mistress is upset that she bet on the wrong horse and has serious regrets i'd re-examine in the entire relationship once I found that she had DM'd the new fiance with news.

1:27:44Re-examine. No, it's over. And also, this guy sucks too, so I don't really fucking care. Actually, you guys should just stay together because you deserve to be. We need you guys not to be on the market for other people. Just stay together. Goodbye. Please do everyone else a favor. Yeah. Ugh, it's so frustrating. Honestly, I would probably tell her to pack up and leave and then apologize to my ex-wife for her behavior and wish my ex well. OP responds, she swore that she wasn't interested in him just that she felt that my ex wasn't worth what she's getting and that she ex has been smug and arrogant about it so my wife thought she wanted to give her a wake-up call despicable grotesque human what in the actual fuck she's smug and arrogant no she's probably just happy she who happy and in love and moving on like oh no like you're such an actual asshole oh my gosh I can't believe this and she had every right to be mad and bitter and like taint the water well and she told the children she was like that's your dad he still loves you like to have that composure and still like to be so wronged and go forward in such a mature way tactful yeah wow insane wow wow wow okay well what does OP have to say from here um so another comment says i think it's very disturbing behavior that she helped to break up one marriage of this woman and tried to break up a second relationship of this woman there's definitely deep-seated obsession and jealousy as if she is in competition bad talking your ex is also a sign of this i give your ex so much credit in the way she handled your divorce and being able to help your relationship with your kids many women in her shoes would find this very difficult your ex is a saint and i hope you appreciate her your wife needs help and if i were you i would really think hard if she's actually a healthy partner for you she's not your kids don't like her and that's got to be tense for you she trash talks your ex that's got to be difficult to deal with and she basically attempted to cheat on you in a sick and twisted attempt to hurt your ex and she did like yeah in a way like sending someone nudes that's so stepping out on your marriage at least a little bit yes yeah op responds i know that my ex is one of the most beautiful people i've ever met both inside and out i don't understand why my wife hates her she never once blamed my wife for anything and she was really helpful in making my family and friends not to shun me and my new wife and as i said it is thanks to her that i of the love of my children.

1:30:27Yeah. OP does admit in a comment that they did marry the woman to save face. I admit it was to save face marrying my wife. That's why I feel guilty now and not just outright pissed. I still love my ex. And even though I'm happy, she is happy again. I regret what I did every day. I think my wife knows this. That's why I'm not as pissed as I should be. Got it. There it is. Yeah. So are you hoping that your new wife breaks up your ex-wife and you get her back or what? I think he's just validating the fact that she said you pushed me to this point. And he's like, well, I think about it in my head every day that it's the worst decision I've ever made.

1:31:13So she probably can feel that. And so she's she's not just throwing that out of nowhere is probably what he's saying. Damn. You know what I mean? That's so wild. That is wild. Yeah. Okay. So you definitely need to leave her OP. And it does suck that you, you know, made these decisions that hurt a lot of people and that you deeply regret. But that's not how you move forward in life. You don't just like marry the problem. um so yeah i think it's time to go separate ways and do some work on yourself heal move on find someone who actually is right for you um not crazy and yeah but you're you need to clean up your shit too yeah absolutely yeah there's a comment here she's obsessed with your ex did they have a relationship prior to your affair she's absolutely fixated right and op responds no she only met my ex a couple of times before the affair you think she chose me because of my ex question mark because my ex was very well liked in my office amongst my closest colleagues we don't have any children and yeah i think that is why she sought you out yeah i think it was some weird maybe honestly maybe They met at a beauty salon a long time ago, and then she started stalking her.

1:32:40People, I don't know. I'm like, it just is so, it's so obsessive. It's so weird. For sure. So we do get an update. Hi, everyone. This is an update about my situation. We are getting divorced. Yep, there it is. I have had multiple conversations with my wife about what she did, but unfortunately she doesn't seem to see how bad it is what she's done. She says that she was never interested in my ex's fiance and just wanted to make a point to herself more than to anyone. Okay. And that she still believes she could take him if she wanted. She doesn't consider what she very serious help because she doesn't consider what she did cheating.

1:33:28It was a test. Oh. She said that if she really didn't love me, she would have left a long time ago because she can get whoever she wants. Okay. I was speechless, hearing her rage and cry, but I was done. We don't have children and we have very few joint assets to divide. She will stay in the house until she can find a place to go, but then we are done. She is raging and calling me all sorts of names, but I guess I'm just so very tired and done. Thank you all for the wake-up call. I know i'm a shitty person But maybe it is time for me to stop punishing myself for what I did My wife was a constant reminder of the damage I have done and maybe deep down.

1:34:11I knew she was a bad person But I felt that I didn't deserve better because i'm a bad person too worse even But maybe enough is enough and I need to stop punishing myself. I have two wonderful children So maybe i'm not just bad yeah, you know it's so interesting like Like people make mistakes and we tend to define ourself based on our mistakes and it gets so overwhelming. And it's also just not right and not fair, right, to ourselves. Like we should be able to, like, again, this guy obviously made a horrible mistake and it was really shitty and it hurt a lot of people and it's not good. but it is something that all of us humans have made mistakes and I think what what matters is and what does define us is our intentions moving forward the past we can't change those we can't change the things that we did that we wish that we could so it's like we were literally talking about this last night yeah like no one's perfect right you you're fooling yourself if you think you have been right everyone's flawed it's what's so beautiful about being a human it's like our ability to make mistakes learn and grow from them exactly and so I just think it's like really important for us to remember that that like we can define ourselves based off of the choices that we decide to make in the future like the things that we were doing right now like that's what we need to start like giving ourselves more energy towards because we get so hung up on it and who is it good for it's not good for anyone like no no that crash out just spiraling over something that you can't change I know it's really hard I've I've really I talked about it on the patreon like I'm really struggling with my mental health right now and it's it's something I've I you know we all go through spurts and I really really struggled with it in high school to where I like went inpatient for a little bit, like a couple of days, but it was like, it was really bad.

1:36:20Like I, I, at one point was like suicidal and I just like, you don't want to go down the rabbit hole for too many people. But I'm now at a point where, you know, things pop up and I don't handle stress well and I feel horrible and I have a panic attack. And so a couple of nights ago, I, you know, I'm hyperventilated and I'm like, I think I literally need to go to the hospital like I I don't know how to handle this and mental health is so it's so hard and we we get so in our heads and that just it's just a toilet circling and it's just like how do you get out when you're at the bottom about to get flushed right and it's it's brutal and so I don't know where I was going with this but yeah I'm like I just like I feel I feel this so deeply because you know I've gone through it recently and mental health is it's hard but no and have to forgive yourself and move forward exactly and that's why and that's why I'm like making this point too is because I think it can probably relate to for a lot of people like there's like a lot of us do that we latch on to something that we said or did that like we're up at night thinking about how we wish we could change it how it's embarrassing we question if Like, does that mean I'm a bad person because, like, I said something that I wish I didn't say?

1:37:35And, like, I just think that we need to give ourselves more grace and look forward and look at what our intentions are moving forward and strive to do things in the now and let that be what defines you. And stop defining yourself based off of something, you know, that a moment in time, a moment in time that no longer exists anymore. Especially things you can't change. Exactly. like it's so hard to like not fester on it but you got to like you got to you don't deserve to hold that angst and it's so crazy because like it's like it's like oh talk the talk walk the walk it's like but again that's the mental health of it all it's like we all we all know this but how do you deal how do you become not depressed how do you become not burnt out you know there's resources.

1:38:28I was just looking into this for the Patreon, but there's Emotions Anonymous. It's just like Alcohol Anonymous, kind of the same principles. It's free. It's not therapy. There's not psychologists, but to connect with other people and share and learn those tools that have helped a lot of people. I think it's a great way to get out there, meet people, talk about your feelings, feel some support. And yeah, it could be a good thing to look into if you also are struggling. Well, and Morgan was just telling me that and I had never heard of that, but it's interesting to me because I have a friend who went to AA and she actually said that that like was the best thing that's ever happened for her in her life.

1:39:16And not even because of like the alcohol part, but like actually specifically because of the way that she was able to heal, understand herself, the way she's able to communicate with people. And, and just like when she has really overwhelming emotions, like knowing what to do and where to put them and like how to like, not, you know, again, not feel like you're in a spiral thinking about the past and thinking, you know, trying to define yourself by past mistakes. And so it sounds like something that would be interesting to me. So I will, I will look into that. And if I do do that, I will report back.

1:39:50I know I've really been looking into something called the Hoffman process and it's like a week long intensive, like mental health program. And I know a woman that went through it. Like she talks about it a lot on her podcast and it just seems like a total brain rewiring thing. And I'm just like, it's just hard. Like, I don't know, especially now, like I had someone be like are you going to talk about the Epstein files and I'm like that's over that's like I'm out of my depth like I'm not going to talk about something that like I'm not equipped to talk about and I'm that's that is so out of my depth um and it's obviously a horrible horrible horrific thing it's insane it's insane that you know where we have millions of files being released and it's like oh here you go and people are sorting through them and it's just like nothing's happening what the fuck do we do with these it's that overwhelming paralysis of like what like okay now i'm overwhelmed i'm over stimulated where do i go from here they're horrible well and there are there are people that um like morgan was talking about that she could point you in the direction who really are digging in deep yeah i mean annie elise did a breakdown i love her she's genuinely like such a good person there's um rotten mango that's like basically like a reporter now going into courtrooms and she did a deep dive so there's other creators out there that like obviously it's it's fucking horrendous and like I think if you know me at this point you would know I would think that but this is not the show that would do a deep dive on it exactly there's those and that's the thing right like we we try to keep this is we want this to be a place where people can brief where people can turn it off for a second um so I think it is it's important to, you know, address certain things going on in the world, but it's also important that, you know, there are places where you can have a breather and then we can like point you in directions of where you can be informed.

1:41:47Because I mean, I specifically am not claiming to be an expert on any of the things we talk about on this, this show. No, and like, you only know what you know too. Like I, we were talking about it last night where we were like, I, I want to do some videos where it's just like we address like our early first stories we had like literally the first story we ever read I think it'd be fun to go back watch our takes I'm gonna cringe so hard like it's just I don't think I can emotionally handle that but maybe after EA with there you go maybe you know a little champagne support but I think it'd be fun to like go back and watch some of those early videos or or like react to one of my worst takes and be like oh my god I've grown so much in five years.

1:42:33I am a different person than I was back in 2021. Like I've lived more life. There's and there's certain stories. And that's why I know sometimes when I'm like, wait, I didn't actually want to say that because there's something that I'll hear in a story that triggers me from something that happened when I was younger. But it's not completely like the story in itself. So after I say it and I'm all triggered and stuff, then I'm like, oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. But like back to the story. And that's when I know that's when I'm like, I wish I didn't say that because I was completely speaking from a different lens that no one no one's there with me right now no one's back when I was like nine years old and getting pissed about this one certain topic so no it's it's coming from a very specific place this show is a lot of different topics that bring out some very you know interesting emotions so that's kind of where we're all at you know but yeah yeah but I hope that that little interlude um spoke to some people and maybe I think it will hopefully some people found some type of comfort in in that conversation I know that we totally just went off off the tracks and off away from the reddit stories but um hopefully that can again speak to somebody I think so I think so let me see if I can find a bit of a feel-good story for us just to send us off on a perfect foot wherever you're at in the world, at the gym, cleaning your house, driving, cleaning that plate with the dog's tongue.

1:44:11Dude, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine for a lot of people. I'm just, maybe I have the saliva thing you have too. Yeah, maybe. But with dogs. Yeah. This episode is brought to you by Revolve. My summer has been jam-packed with moments where I just want to look cute. And the best way to do it is to find a good fit, an outfit that makes you feel confident, that feels on trend or reflects your unique style. And Revolve is my go-to place to find those fits. I just went to Europe and basically every single one of my outfits was from Revolve. And I've never, never been complimented more. So whether it's a big night out, a wedding, a summer trip, or you just need something last minute that actually works, Revolve always has it.

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1:45:35So you keep what you earn. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start listing with no seller fees. Did you find something light and fun? I found something funny Okay I think I didn't read it fully Can you read it to me in baby talk? The whole way through This little story is coming from Tiffy People would actually kill me My eyes started watering out of embarrassment Can you do your baby voice? Well, what do you want me to say? Read the title Today I fucked up by sleeping with someone funny. I'm going to cry out of embarrassment. I think yours was better than mine.

1:46:24Today I fucked up sleeping with someone funny. I hooked up with a girl at a New Year's Eve party last year. It was one of those spur-of-the-moment sexual encounters that happen when alcohol is involved. We never saw each other again afterwards. Cut to yesterday. My friend sent me a TikTok video of the New Year's Eve girl. She was on stage somewhere doing stand-up. My friend wanted me to confirm if that was the New Year's Eve girl who I had sex with. I said yes. My friend sent me a million laughing emojis and reaction GIFs before telling me to skip to the four-minute mark. The video was like nine minutes long.

1:47:01At the four-minute mark, New Year's Eve girl said her 2026 started with a bang. An unsatisfying but mildly entertaining bang. Oh. Oh. She said she hooked up with a guy who should never be allowed near another naked woman again. Oh. Because of the following. One, he repeatedly cleared his throat every time he talked dirty. Quote, do you like that dick? Two, he extended his arms in a T-shape during doggy because apparently that stopped him from coming in that position. Oh. Three, he farted in silence during foreplay and thought vaping over the smell was a subtle way of getting away with it. Clever.

1:48:00Four. He said he was going to come next year, which might have been funny if he didn't clear his fucking throat again. I think it's pretty funny. Five, he grabbed the lamp on the bedside table and made shadow figures appear on her body while she was riding. Stop. You're kidding. She did remind the audience I was very drunk, but still. The New Year's Eve girl was definitely talking about me, lol. My friends have been roasting me ever since. That is beautiful. I need us all to become little detectives. Literally. And find this stand-up video. Yeah. I'm like, I need to see this video. And that's the top comment, too.

1:48:50I think every man needs an experience like this. They need to be humbled. I know, a little bit. That's really funny. um also who's the comedian i'm like is it who is it op does respond to give people clues to help find the video the account that the video is posted on belongs to a local comedy club the video is on the comedy club's social media the video was recorded in mid-january from what i know but the comedy club reposted it for valentine's day someone goes name the club in the city op is like because people are like this didn't happen blah blah blah blah people are like you forgot to include the link and now i'm like how can we find this i just love that like op got so creative in his his sexual pursuits someone comments quote i haven't come since last year is legitimately hilarious and I feel most comics would really appreciate it.

1:49:56It's all about the delivery. He shouldn't have cleared his throat first. Well, he doesn't want it to come out all gargley. I'm going to do a deep dive on the internet to find this video. I thought you were going to try to reenact it gargley. You put the pressure on me to reenact things, try things in baby voice. You know, I would like, I would appreciate a little more initiative where you do everything first You always give it back to me Yeah, because I feel so embarrassed I have to Yeah, so I thought that was our thing Now you're telling me you have a problem with it I'll do it after you I have stage fright I have stage fright Why can't we both have stage fright?

1:50:39You have a podcast There's no one here and it's not on a stage you get to edit out the bad parts i don't get to do that i've told you you can edit many times it's the grass is not always greener no you said i suck at editing it wasn't good guys i was trying to find the the video but i cannot find it if anyone is feeling in a sleuthy mood today there's got to be someone please have a go at it and then send us her link i'm gonna love that if you guys find that i'm can you imagine so proud we find like our next favorite stand-up yes yes and then have her on we do love a comic i i think it's great when you bring comedians on here i know i love it taylor tomlinson i love her she's so sweet so fun uh hannah burner our gal we saw her last night again so sweet they're both so witty and like the smart i love i think what i've really grown to appreciate about stand-up comics but i feel like a majority of the women doing it are so smart smart in the jokes they tell yeah and like i think that's my humor and like maybe there's some guys doing it please send me some links um there's a new guy on snl that i really love and He's also from Minnesota.

1:52:05Oh, cool. So I've been trying to get him on. But I like the comics. I feel like they have the speed to banter enough on the pod. No, I think that if I were you inviting guests on, I would definitely look for a lot of comedians. Because I do think that there is a type of intelligence with comedians that a lot of people don't even like. They're quick, man. They don't think about it because they're busy laughing. But again, yeah, to be able to be as quick to piece things together and make people laugh is it is a type of intelligence. You have to be so quick, so quick. That improv, that training they get.

1:52:45Would you want to go to an improv class with me to help our brains work faster? Yeah. OK, cool. I don't want to go alone. Yeah, I'm totally down. OK, cool. What if you became like the next big stand up? Yeah, why not? I honestly could. Oh my God. I felt my toe out. I could honestly see that from you. I think like I would have to get over stage fright first. Beta blockers. That's what we're going to do next time. There we go. Love beta blockers. But only if they're prescribed to you. Talk to your doctor. Especially if you're having tummy issues. Colon Cancer Awareness Month. But okay. That's all we got.

1:53:25We're going to be back with Rare Breed 2.0. very soon. If you see any utter weirdos upon Reddit, send them our way. Yeah. Send them my way. And I'll put it in my little folder. I have so many good stories. I'm like, ugh, I just want to sit here for like two more hours and get through more stories. Should we just record the other one right now? Um... No. You're tired. I'm hungry. Okay. Back soon. Thank you both. Thank you all. Just two of you out there Thank you to both of my cameras for being here I'm so Out of it I'm tired Thank you for both of my brain cells For coming through There's not both, there's just one There's only one brain cell up there Fighting for it's life You know like the Inside Out movie Where there's all the little emotions, punching buttons I only have one There's only one up there Thank you for both of the people listening mom dad really appreciate

1:54:32man love you all if you want more love you guys go over to patreon until next time until next time bye

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1:55:44They're good, simple clothes that are going to end up becoming part of your daily routine. And I've never felt more empowered and comfortable in my clothes thanks to Skims. Shop Skims cotton and all of my favorite pieces at Skims.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know I sent you. Select podcast in the survey and be sure to select my show in the drop down menu that follows. Thank you. For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters. Trimphia offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tremphaya is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks.

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