262: Let's Not Meet Again..

27:14I just saw this TikTok from someone and she was like, how did I know I was pregnant? And then if you swiped, it went to a video of her husband like throwing up. And I went down the rabbit hole thanks to the comments on that about, I'm probably going to butcher the pronunciation, but Kuvade syndrome or sympathetic pregnancy. Oh, interesting. And this is like a real phenomenon apparently driven by hormonal changes and empathy that affects 10 to 65 percent of partners and like literally people were commenting and they're like yeah my husband had morning sickness the whole time I never had it once the whole pregnancy what like I've not heard of this literally people were like my husband got so bloated he looked more pregnant than me wow i've heard of like sympathy symptoms i guess from pregnancy but i thought it was more just they're also moody and thinking that they're hormonal or something but not the actual physical symptoms no physical symptoms nausea vomiting waking fatigue and a variety of others i could not get over i that i fell down that rabbit hole so hard whoa so hard that's really wild so wild but okay moving on to this next one okay this one is coming from r slash dating advice a couple days old, titled, He Said He Gives His Mom Backrubs Every Night.

28:36Let's do it. So I went on a third date with a guy, male 29, and we were on the topic of me buying a home. He tells me that he has no desire to move out and lives with his mom. He smokes weed with her all the time and does bong rips with her on the weekend. He then tells me he pays little rent and it covers the groceries she buys him. And then he blurts out, I give her back rubs every night. Is this something normal to say on a third date with pretty much no context? Just context-less. Just brings it up. No. Run. Yeah. I always worry when people are too dependent on their parents and are also trying to enter a relationship.

29:24Like, are you just looking for another parent? Yeah. You know, like you have this really special mommy connection that is, you know, a boy mom thing, as they say now. But like, even aside from the back massages, just everything about that situation, just being that. We do bong rips on the weekend. I smoke weed with my mom every night. She doesn't make me pay rent or she doesn't make me pay a lot of rent. I pay a little rent, but then she takes the money and buys my groceries. Yeah, no, because they just are going to want that from you. And he's 29. He's 29. 29? Pushing 30. It's time to go grocery shop yourself.

30:03It's time to grocery shop for yourself. There's no way he's doing his own laundry. No chance. Ugh. I don't know. Did you ever date anyone like that? No. I'm trying to think. I, yes. You did? Yeah. I feel like there were a few guys maybe that I dated that you could tell. I mean, this was, I met my husband when I was 26. So this was definitely early 20s. So the guys were a little bit younger. where they just had someone do something for them for their whole lives. Yeah. Until this point. Like a place you could drive and your laundry would get done. Like you could take your laundry to your mom's house and she would just do it for you and fold it.

30:37So you just didn't have to learn that skill. Which sounds great. But like you should still know how to do it. Yeah, you should definitely still know how to do your own laundry. Also, it's so much work packing it up, putting it in your car, driving it somewhere. I know. When you just do it yourself. I know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, unfortunately, I mean, it's like Sabrina Carpenter's entire repertoire, right? That's like what she sings about in all of her songs. I think everyone's like experienced people like this. Yeah. What did the comment say? Top comment. Guy here. Not normal. Kinda Norman Bates-esque.

31:09Yeah, it is. Next comment down. Why'd you have to say that? Now I just imagined this dude lighting up with the corpse of his mother and then giving it a back rub. yeah it is that like obsessive yeah someone goes giving a family member a back rub doesn't mean a psychotic abusive relationship is at hand once again i have to ask what the fuck is wrong with people on this sub i mean i still have my mom like if i go home and visit and i'm like sitting on the couch watching a movie with my mom i'm kind of like can you rub my feet yeah or like scratch my scalp yeah like just play with my hair i'm like that's fine but like i feel like giving your mom a back rub every night like if justin did that i would find it weird yeah i think so too i think so too yeah i think again it's it's not even just like the back rub who knows if there's anything like inherently weird about that like with their relationship but just everything about how close he is to his mother at 29 years old and not wanting to because he never wants to move out yeah that's the thing never never never wanting to move on with your life because obviously you can't be in a relationship with someone like that.

32:18Like if someone tells you I can't ever move out of my mom's house because I just enjoy living with her. Are you going to you're not going to marry that person. You're not going to have kids with that person. What are you going to do? So I'd say I'm glad that he brought that up that early. Three dates in. So at least, you know, and you can run. You can run. But I would say that's the only option here is to run. Yeah. Never meet again. Bye. No. Bye. Only third date. Get out of there. Yeah. Not that much time wasted. That's okay. You're good. But just don't give him any more time. Don't go back. No.

32:51Okay, moving on to this next one. Okay. Story number three for us here. This is coming from r slash true off my chest. It is 20 days old now titled I've spent the best Christmas of my life since I got married and it's making my husband panic. I'm five months pregnant. When I found out about my pregnancy, my husband's nephew punched me hard in my stomach. Sister-in-law said it was a bit of a phase, but then Christmas came and mother-in-law called to say that the phase was still going on and since they didn't want any accidents, that I should stay home this time. My husband, to my surprise, started packing on the 21st.

33:37Oh, you wanted me to stay? He said, correctly, interpreting my facial expression. I stood silent, and then I said, no, you can go. He smiled sheepishly. My work colleague, unmarried older lady, suggested that we could do something together, and I spent Christmas with her. I don't remember the last time I was this happy during the holidays. I don't have a family, and my husband's was the only one that I knew. And for the past 15 years, I've endured my passive-aggressive alcoholic father-in-law, my pretentious mother-in-law, and golden child sister-in-law who peaked in high school and married the jock.

34:21I slept in, stayed in, ate whatever I wanted without anyone commenting on my body. There were no rants about how some minorities ruined it for the rest. Quote, but of course you're one of the good ones. And the latest, quote, I don't think your baby will have blue eyes. Like I really cared or didn't understand basic biology. I didn't miss having to wake up at 7am and if you literally missed meal hours, you needed to wait for the next meal because it is disrespectful not to be on time. I didn't miss being forced to cook weird food from my home country so they can sniff and wrinkle their noses and call it interesting.

35:08Most of all, I didn't have my husband by my side being anxious the entire stay, not wanting to rock the boat, trying to soften the blows and explain that they didn't really mean any of it. When he got home, he was anxious, and me being very happy as opposed to the usual crying all the way home from his parents made him even more anxious. I told him that I was fine and that I had a great time. He's panicking. He apologized and said that in hindsight, maybe he should have stayed home with me instead, but then he wouldn't have celebrated Christmas with his family, and they would definitely have been disappointed.

35:50I said nothing, just looked at his anxious face, probably with a frown that made him even more anxious. Everything is fine, I said again. Now, I guess I understand why he is panicking. Because why have I let this go on for so long? My colleague is also a lonely woman with no family, but she is so much happier than I have been in many years. I've been thinking about this newfound freedom in loneliness since Christmas, and I guess my husband is sensing it. Whoa. What a nightmare. What a nightmare family to have to do to deal with that for 15 years. Oh, my God. 15 years of that. You have the strength and mental composure of I don't I don't even know, like Mother Teresa.

36:43I know. And actually, that you bring that up made me feel a little bit better because I was like, oh, it's very sad to have that realization when you're five months pregnant because you're about to have a child. Yeah. And you absolutely shouldn't be with this person, first and foremost, and not anywhere near this family. That's horrible. But it kind of breaks my heart a little bit that she might go through motherhood alone. But it does sound like she's a strong person. Oh, my God. So strong. Yeah. And honestly, like because my mom had three kids with three different dads and each one was like.

37:17They're not great, you guys. They're not they're not great. And so she kind of went through this where like my bio dad, I don't even think he was at the hospital. Should ask for that. I don't know. I'm like, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, he wasn't there, which was kind of a blessing. but because he wasn't involved my mom let my dad jerry like step up to the plate like they were friends yeah and then he was there for her like they were kind of dating on and off kind of messy but then like because my bio dad wasn't really in the picture when i was a baby jerry like he was my dad i started calling him dad yeah and then my mom was like well what should we do about this he's like no i'm dad and then he stepped up wow so when you kind of create more space for other people that's a really good point like you find these other blessings that like you don't even you might not even realize are out there and every single day I'm like thank god that happened that way because that's so beautiful it's such like I'm here I'm literally here because of him yeah um in like a lot of different ways but like it just like I can't imagine not having him as my dad yeah and this family like this baby by the sounds of it does have a mixed ethnicity like they're saying these comments to you I don't know if your baby's gonna have blue eyes I know that's why you just don't want the baby to be raised around that hell no bullshit no and like like them checking the baby to see how white it is which is what I imagine that they're trying to do.

38:49Yeah. So it's just like, no, you don't want the kid around that. That's horrible. No, that's really sad. But it's amazing that like you and your mom are so supported in that time anyways, because I know it can be scary. A lot of women won't leave their husbands during this time because it's so scary to be like, am I going to have to go through this whole journey alone? Yeah. Oh, that would be terrifying. Is all the responsibility going to fall on me? It's so sad. Yeah. But yeah, like you said, when you let that person go, you might actually open up space for someone better to... come help you and support you.

39:19Absolutely. I know. And like, honestly, I would feel really angry at my partner. Like I saw your face when it was like he just started packing to go without her. Well, first of all, wait, how old was the kid at the beginning? Because that we just started at 100. So there's no mention how old anyone in this is, but they've they've been together for 15 years. At the time of writing this, which is about 23 days ago now, OP was five months pregnant. So she wrote this February 20th, five months pregnant. So at Christmas time would have been about three months pregnant. Yeah, three months pregnant. And when she announced that she was pregnant, the nephew punched her.

40:04Nephew punched me hard in the stomach. The fact that you weren't supported by your partner during that he didn't cut off contact with every one that was not appalled by that and they said it was a phase it's a phase how old we don't know how old this nephew is do you do kids have where they punch adults like with all their might and then you just like accept it and say that it's a phase that is really upsetting to me i mean it's insane that the mother-in-law was like, yeah, he's still going through that phase where he might punch you in the stomach. Yeah. He might be upset and try to end your pregnancy for you.

40:49So you should stay home. Not, we'll have her over in the morning and then you guys can come in the afternoon. Not like, oh, we'll split time or, hey, daughter, love you. But maybe you celebrate just your family. Yeah. You're punching child. Can't come to my house. What about that? Or even easier, hubby, you stay home. I'm your family. Am I not your family? No, I'm your family. And also, like, we're about to have a child together and that's your family. And if you can't even stay home for this, like, what's going to happen? Like, what? In the future? No, it's horrible. The fact that he said he apologized and he should have maybe stayed home in hindsight, but then he would not have celebrated Christmas with his family and they would have definitely been disappointed.

41:31Who cares? No, I'm your family. Like that's the thing that like you would have celebrated with your family because you would have been home with your wife, with your pregnant wife. What am I? Who is your family? What am I? Chopped liver. Like that's insane. What am I? I'm trying to look and see if there's any other comments. I'm like, what are the people saying? From OP. Or what's OP saying? I know. Couple comments from OP. I know for a fact I'm never spending another Christmas with them ever again. At least not like my husband wants. which is basically the 21st slash 22nd through the 29th. He was gone for a week?

42:12A week? When you're three months pregnant, he takes off for a week to spend time with his family. No. Nephew is six years old. It's definitely like the adults are all also at fault too for not trying to correct that behavior. Uh-huh. There's a comment here that's just so sad. OP says, I'm more lonely when I'm with his family than alone. I bet. I rarely feel lonely when I'm alone. Then I think you're going to be better off alone. I think you're going to have a really much better time just being alone, like actually alone. OP says, I will admit I've never been good with talking about feelings, but I need to be better with my baby on the way.

42:55Yeah. And that's like literally the first story too. It's like, you just got to talk about how you feel. I know. I know. You're never going to trust your child if they go over to that family's house, because if the six-year-old already punched you, I would always be paranoid that the six-year-old was going to really, really hurt my baby. Yeah. And I would never, ever want my kid alone. But it sounds like the whole family's prioritizing that kid. There is a comment here, and it's only got 12 upvotes, but OP does respond to it. Your husband seems traumatized by his own family, constantly anxious to be put in the middle, and having difficulties navigating the situation and being fully on your side.

43:37Was he the mediator of the family? Does he show people-pleasing tendencies? I think he is very scared you will leave him, and you are probably the only good thing he has. The others are his toxic family that he cannot shake. You guys should talk openly. Definitely low to no contact with the family if your family is to have any chance of a chance to a happy future. He should get therapy to loosen the enmeshment with his family. And if he is open and not resisting, I also think you might be better off on your own. Good luck to you both. Enmeshment's a good word. I think that is the word for it. He's clearly like too enmeshed in his family.

44:16I mean, the undying loyalty, even when they say and do horrible things, kind of fits into that. But OP does respond and says he is the black sheep of the family for sure. That's why I've been patient and understanding because I know the feeling of neglect and not being someone's priority. But my patience is running out fast with the pace of the arrival of my baby. I suddenly have more important matters to be understanding of. My baby is not chosen to be born, I feel already a lot of pain for them. I will be honest, I've been contemplating leaving my marriage even though I love my husband very deeply, especially after I realized how good it felt to spend the holidays on my own terms.

44:57But then I thought divorce means I have no control over my child's exposure to his extended family. I can't have that on my conscience. I can't have them have access to my child whenever it is time for his custody. I believe that staying is my best option, especially since I have lots of love for the father of my child. And I guess he loves me too in his own way. That's got to be so scary as a parent. If you're splitting custody, I have a friend who's going through this right now. When you're splitting custody and you just send the kid, your baby, your everything into whatever chaos is happening at the other parent's place or the other family's place.

45:37And you have no control over that because it's not your designated time. so I feel like I do understand that thought process of her of like well I don't want to drop my child off at this family's and they can just say whatever or do whatever or that six-year-old can just be around punching him like yeah that is also really horrifying and really scary and it's a very real fear it happens it does like I went through it I'd get dropped off at my bio dad's place and alcohol was involved and I'd get screamed at like chased like Jerry's not your real dad like it I I mean I like feel like I'm like I I relate so much so it's like yeah that is absolutely a real valid fear a hundred percent and I think it is a lot of times why people are like you know I'm in this until my kid's 18 and then after that yeah they're an adult they choose where they live and who they can see and but maybe I have more control if we're together because I can be the one with the final say but if we're apart and I just send them with my how often When were you at your bio dad's?

46:40It kind of depended. Like early on, my mom would really like try to make it work and like wanted me to have a relationship. Yeah. And so he was close when I was a baby and then moved further away as I was like five to ten. And so I'd go do weekends down there. And it just got to a point where it's like I would cry every time I had to go. I didn't want to go. I was stressed. It was just like horrible. So then she was like, didn't force it. And then it was like, birthdays and Christmas, which was, it was great. Yeah. Going through high school, like you obviously I think I had like a big abandonment wound and like, a lot of issues.

47:20And then like, I had a little sister and I was like, why is he a good dad for her and not for me. So like, you're still a kid, you'll still go through those very normal things. things but in the long term now 2020 like being passed and having all this hindsight I'm like so thankful that it did go the way it did versus 50 50 split custody yeah yeah how long do you think it took you to kind of come to terms with the way that it all went down I honestly don't think I did until like recent years like maybe I'd be curious to like listen to old episodes of me talking about stuff on the podcast and like what like angle I take to address similar stories that I can relate to but I honestly think especially in the past like three years and like when I was wedding planning and like realizing like something big like who do I want to walk me down the aisle and who deserves that honor and like I would say honestly like that really helped kind of facilitate a lot of thought and like processing of things too yeah yeah but yeah recent years at least in the last five it's so 32 like I know I mean it's the shit sticks with you it's definitely something I think about a lot now having a kid is oh my gosh these things really do stick with people their entire lives yeah and it's just like it's so crazy it's like and what you remember too based on like the stress of a moment or how crazy it was and it's like oh I had to remember that but I don't I don't remember getting in my puppy like you know what I mean don't they say that too about like most things in life you remember the most stressful or like the most emotional parts that's kind of when your brain locks in and forms core memories so it's unfortunate that the more stressful things are the ones that form us as people than maybe the more happy ones I know yeah it's crazy wow but couldn't like wouldn't change a thing here I am you know it all led me to this it gives me like experience to have but I'm like for this person I'm like I do 100 % see where they're coming from and I think they've got a really good head on their shoulder well it sounds like it to where they'll figure it out they're very aware of themselves they know that they're happier not being with that family they know they're happier when they're alone yeah just trust yourself in this trust yourself and there's you know there's Almost 9 ,000 upvotes on this right now, 8.7K.

49:45And OP does respond to quite a few comments. Like, when the baby is born, start your own tradition of just the three of you for Christmas. Sounds like your husband could do with a break, too. What's his family going to do? Be even more fucking awful? They're already there. Yeah. And OP is like, definitely the best suggestion I've gotten here from many. That's what's going to happen. Yeah, that there's maybe a path forward with the three of them as a family. He's got to get on board. But he has to be on board. definitely like enmeshment therapy for sure yeah absolutely um but yeah i mean i kind of read what op responded to um someone does comment the kid punching pregnant women yes question mark over that and someone responds down it's a phase the homicidal psycho phase yeah yes yes oh my son you know he's in his homicidal phase.

50:37It'll pass by seven. Like what? Someone responds, I've heard of a biting phase, but never in my life have I heard of a kid with a punch everyone in the bread basket as hard as you can phase. Yes. Maybe the kid should stay home. Well, also, I mean, just as someone who I have personal experience, I guess, with someone that I know whose younger brother was always told it was a phase, it was a phase. And then the older he got and the bigger he got and the stronger he got, this was definitely not a phase. This was who he was as a person, but because all of his behavior was explained away and forgiven as a child, he never got the actual help that he needed.

51:15Damn. And that can have really disastrous consequences. Absolutely. That's a really good point. Also the biting phase, like that is crazy that that's a phase. Yeah. And the hitting, just like the hitting in the face phase that toddlers do. What do you do with the biting phase. Oh, if they bite you. I've seen a Reddit post where this person had a nephew. I haven't read it yet on the pod. Maybe I should whip it out someday. Yeah. But they were like, I put hot sauce on my arm because my little cousin wouldn't stop biting me and the family was doing nothing about it. Yeah. So I put hot sauce on my arm.

51:49I would say like if you're the one being bitten and it's not your kid and you don't want them to bite you anymore, that's totally fine because the hot sauce isn't going to kill them. And it's definitely going to have a negative of association with biting my cousin. I'm like, what? I need to know because I'm like, you just like, you don't know what you're going to do when you're a parent. Like, do the books talk about biting? Do they talk about the biting? The books talk about... Do they get there? We read a lot of books. They kind of do. I guess they talk about ways to discipline your children and they all say something different.

52:19It's so impossible to know what the right thing to do. And that's so crazy too. I'm just going to, when we get to that phase, because my baby's nine weeks old, so he doesn't do anything and can't be disciplined because babies don't understand anything and they're perfect. They're so good. But I'm just going to have to read a bunch of studies and be like, what is actually effective? What's the least damaging? What is the least damaging, most effective way to deal with this in a way that also like nips the behavior? Yeah. It's something me and my older brother have talked about a lot because like we grew up with a style of discipline that is frowned upon these days.

52:53Of course. I think a lot of people have that experience. We got spanked. and so like he does not spank his kids he's very like gentle parenting vibes and so it's been really cool to like watch how like he's just gone the total opposite direction and it's worked pretty well his kids are good i love that i love that yes you can have like good outcomes with a bunch of different ways of dealing with children absolutely also every kid is just different i know but if your parent out there and your kid was a biter went through the biting phase yeah what did you do please let us know i was a biter were you i was a biter yeah i remember i bit my mom once because i would get really excited and so my mom came home from work one day and i bit my mom and i just ran up and chomped her she picked me up and i bit her on her shoulder and it hurt her oh because i was probably like three or four like i was getting strong yeah and i remember she put me down like immediately was like stone face put me down turned around and then my dad came and scooped me up and brought me upstairs and like how to like I remember sitting on the bed and him being like we don't bite oh my god this isn't gonna happen again see I didn't go through the biting phase I went through the phase of like I would go in the fridge and take sticks of butter out of the fridge I'd bite the butter I remember a vivid image of like trying to eat a napkin once oh my gosh I would take the cat and I would go behind the couch and give her haircuts how bad are we talking oh she was hacked wow little sweetheart her name was sweetheart oh she was not looking cute how did they get you to stop or was it a phase did you just have to grow out of it i don't remember i'm gonna have to ask yeah i'm curious like what why did i stop giving the cat haircuts she ran out of hair to cut i don't know yeah yeah right what was it i moved on to destroy other things yeah i'm like i don't know i went outside more they put me outside Oh, kids, man.

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55:59With thoughtful features like stow-and-go seating, hands-free sliding doors, and passenger seating up to eight, It helps keep everything moving because family life isn't about the perfect moments. It's about making the most of any moment. Visit your local dealer or Chrysler.com to learn more and schedule a test drive today. Chrysler is a registered trademark of SCA US LLC. You just never know how you're going to actually have to deal with them. You never know. But moving on to these ones, we're starting to get a little into the scarier side of things. Ooh, okay. I'm excited. This is coming from r slash relationship advice.

56:36It is 12 days old titled, I genuinely think my husband is a psychopath. Whoa. Hi, everyone. Please. I need help. I'm a 35 female and my husband is 36 male. We've been married for 10 years and have two boys, seven and five. I honestly don't know what to think anymore. About three months ago, my husband started sending me really nasty messages while he was at work. At first, it was just mean comments. Stuff like telling me I'm lazy, that I'm a terrible mother, that he regrets marrying me. It was completely out of nowhere. The weird part is that when he would come home from work, he would act completely normal.

57:21Like nothing happened. He would kiss me, ask me what's for dinner, play with the kids. the first time it happened, I thought maybe he was having a bad day at work, but the messages kept coming. Sometimes he would send them during the day, sometimes late at night if he was working overtime. They got worse too, saying things like I'm useless, that I'm lucky he hasn't left me yet, that no one else would want me. The first few times I confronted him, he acted confused, Like genuinely confused. He would say things like, what messages? Or you must be misunderstanding something. I literally showed him the text on my phone and he just stared at them and said he didn't send them, claiming that he lost his phone, which he did, but he had a new one and was still texting and calling from that number.

58:16I know it sounds ridiculous, but he didn't look guilty. He looked confused. almost scared. I thought maybe he was gaslighting me, but it was such a weird way to do it because he never got angry in person. Finally, about a month ago, I snapped. I showed him a bunch of the messages at once and told him I couldn't keep living like this. I told him if he hated me so much, he should just say it to my face. He kept insisting he didn't send them and said maybe that someone was messing with us. At that point, I was done. I packed my clothes, grabbed the kids, and went to stay with my parents who live in the same city.

58:55They were amazing and helped so much, and I never felt luckier to have close family. Since then, the messages have continued. Same number, same horrible tone. Things like, running to mommy's house just proves my point. You're pathetic. You'll come crawling back eventually. I sent him screenshots back to the same number, and he still swore again that he wasn't sending them. He was just saying that he lost his phone at work and he had to get a replacement, but he still had the same number. And when he would show me his phone, I didn't see the messages. I just thought he was deleting them though.

59:38He said someone must have found the phone and was messaging me. Last week, though, I let the kids stay with him for a couple of weeks. Since he's still their dad and they miss him, he's still denying everything. Says he never sent those messages and that he thinks someone is still using his old phone. Meanwhile, the texts haven't stopped. At this point, I don't even know what to believe anymore. Either he's lying to my face or something really weird is going on. Has anyone ever dealt with something similar? I feel like I'm going insane and I don't know what to believe. We genuinely had the most perfect relationship before all of this.

1:00:16I don't know what to do. I'm scared I'm breaking my family apart for no good reason. But some of the texts have been so horrible, I can't even include them on here. This is like horror movie level stuff. Insane. This is something that would break me a little bit of I don't know what's real or what's not real. But I think you need to get down to a T-Mobile store immediately and ask them what's going on with the phones. Like, is this even possible? I think that would be my first reaction would to be like, is this even possible? Like if you did lose your phone, can someone be texting me on, I don't know if like she's being texted on WhatsApp or if it's just like the iPhone messages or what, but I would really need clarity on what is even possible.

1:01:10Yeah, because with iMessage, you can be logged in from multiple different devices and it will still show from the number. Like I text on my computer and it still just shows normal. Could be on the computer. Someone could have found that phone. it's interesting like because like with iphone you can lock the phone as like lost or stolen i'm sure with android and other devices you can do the same thing so why didn't he lock it like you can even like i can like remotely wipe my phone that i lost like yeah did he not do that did he not go to the genius bar and have them shut down the other phone properly or like why a new phone on the internet yeah or like even for him it's like your wife is coming to you being like why are you sending me this she's being harassed she's being harassed this is really serious why aren't you going and being like i need to change my number i need to do something i did you watch the catfish documentary the like unknown number catfish no documentary yes you did you must have about the teenage girl that's getting all the text messages you talked to me about it but i never watched it oh my gosh morgan you have to watch the things i ask you to watch no you give me so many i don't know how you find the time to watch all this stuff i'm just like constantly like turning through documentaries.

1:02:19If you want reviews and like people talking about the most up to date, insane documentaries from cruise ship murders to catfish things, go follow Kaylin on Instagram. Like you're on it. You, you are just, it's your job. You're on it. Yeah. I do love a shocking documentary. So I don't even want to say too much about this because it is really wild what they figure out. But the top comment mentions it. Yes. That's what I'm saying. It just immediately struck that note or like that chord in my brain. But I won't spoil anything. But the premise is that this teen girl does start getting a lot of really scary messages.

1:02:55And everyone in her life is really trying to figure out what's going on. But the fact that the husband is just like, I don't know, it wasn't me. And then kind of ignores it is also concerning to me because this is real harassment. Clearly, she's feeling like she's going insane or she doesn't know what to trust. That can really, really psychologically damage a person. And also she left the house to go stay at her sister's parents and parents family. So like, oh, as a partner and someone's going through that, if that truly is not you and someone's using your identity to send these hateful messages to your wife, like you got to help her figure it out.

1:03:31Like I would want to clear my name. I know. Exactly. Which kind of makes me wonder if he is doing it. That's why I'm like, what the like, I would want to clear my name. Like this is not me. Like if someone was sending crazy stuff to anyone, my partner, my friends, I would do anything. I would change my number despite having it since like the fifth grade. I would go nuts. But if it is him, because have you dealt with stories like this before? I feel like you're kind of more wrapped up in like the psychology of people. But no. Someone who is playing the good guy at home and then going to work and texting horrible things to his own wife, deleting the messages off his phone so he can come back and be like, see, it wasn't me.

1:04:12That's some sort of abusive control situation or some, I don't even know. If it is him, yeah, no, that's like severe psychological abuse. It's almost like a more extreme form of like negging to get someone to then like work harder for your approval. Like to say things like, you're pathetic, you'll come crawling back eventually like some of it was kind of like are you trying to like keep me under your thumb and like I need to seek your validation more yeah then some of it where it's like running to mommies just proves my point I don't know it's interesting I like is he having an affair and the he logged into his eye phone whatever like messages on her computer now she's sending this hateful stuff as a way to separate them?

1:05:02Or is he trying to like push her to divorce him? Or is it some sort of like you were saying, nagging where I want you to stay with me, but I want you to really fight for my affection. So I'm like planting the seed of doubt. What do you think? What does your gut say if it's him or if it's someone else? I can't really tell you my gut because we get an update. Okay. Okay. And I know what happens. So I've been like, I've been trying to like, I'm like, I can't, I can't ruin it. Okay. I will say I'm going to read the top comment after the update, and it does give a spoiler for that doc, but I will make a very clear spoiler warning so you can skip.

1:05:40But okay, let's get in to the update. I did a lot more research and some comments helped me investigate. I think I know how the messages are happening from multiple devices. Because we message using WhatsApp, after doing some research, it does allow for multiple devices to be connected to the same account. So it is possible someone else could be doing it from his lost phone. But overnight, the messages didn't slow down. They actually got worse. They weren't just insults anymore. Some of them started to feel like threats. I was terrified. Things about how I would regret leaving, and some a lot worse.

1:06:20I barely slept last night because of it At one point late last night I finally texted back and I said that if the messages didn't stop I was going to the police I know a lot of people said not to do this But I couldn't take it anymore and I knew that whether it was my husband or not the person doing this would at least see it I know I made a lot of people angry that I just couldn't make up my mind on what to do But here's your reminder. This is my husband the man. I loved unconditionally for over 10 years. Dumping him and blocking him out of nowhere isn't an option. We built a family and a life together.

1:06:57My life isn't a movie. I can't just cut the last 10 years out like many of you insinuated, as well as calling me a liar, an attention seeker, and pointing out every mistake I made. I know I posted online for help and I need to accept some hate, but I fear sometimes people on Reddit can just go too far, and I really saw that over the last day. Please think of the harm you cause when you leave a comment. This isn't just social media. It's my current real life, and I know many of you that wrote these probably wouldn't say it to my face. Now, the messages didn't stop. If anything, they got more aggressive.

1:07:34At that point, I was convinced it had to be him, and I decided to be true to my word, and I actually went to the police station. I saw some comments about being able to track a device to a small location, and you can ask for that if you have the information about the phone, which I got from my husband, and are on the phone plan, which I am on. The worst thing about all of this is that me contacting him about the kids and any information also went to whoever was sending the horrible messages. I was terrified about putting them in danger and maybe making who was doing this more angry, so I knew it was urgent to get help.

1:08:13At the station, they were able to track the missing phone. I claimed it was just lost because at the time, I didn't know if I was going to file charges. Because it was my husband's phone, they actually gave me the location and the officer who helped was very nice. The address was very familiar and quite close to our house, so I decided to drive past to see where it was from. Turns out I had been to one of my husband's workplace parties there, and the coworker that lives there I'm actually quite close to. I was angry and honestly just exhausted from it all. The kids were with him, so I went over early to pick them up before he expected me.

1:08:55My mom came with me because I didn't want to go alone. She took the boys so I could talk to him privately. I told him I knew one of his co-workers had his old phone and how I was disgusted that she was ever someone I considered a friend. By this point, I was absolutely breaking down. When I told him this, he just looked shocked. So I asked, why was his phone at her house? Yeah. And how did she know your password? He just said maybe she took it from work and I don't know how she knew. But after reading some comments, I was done with these playing it down excuses. The answer didn't sit right with me at all.

1:09:37Something about the whole situation felt off. The messages had been too personal. Whoever was sending them knew things that only someone very close to us would have known. So I pushed harder. It turns out the coworker, 30 female wasn't just a co-worker there it is she had been having an affair with my husband for over a year oh my god he tried to claim it wasn't serious but i was sick of him making me feel like i was overreacting i know people said this was a possibility but i could just never bring myself to believe it i've never felt so betrayed everything made sense she knew details about our relationship, our house, our routine, the kids.

1:10:22Things that would be impossible for a stranger to know. All because my husband was telling her everything. I don't know exactly how she ended up with his old phone. He claims he lost it at work and thinks that she took it. I honestly don't know what to believe anymore. All I know is that the messages kept coming from that device, and they just kept getting worse. Who knows how far she would have gone? Apparently, my husband lost his phone and whoever kept using it. Meanwhile, he'd gotten a replacement phone, but the old phone was still logged into WhatsApp. So technically both phones were tied to the same account and I didn't even realize WhatsApp wasn't the same as messages and things like this can happen.

1:11:03Part of me thinks there's no way he didn't realize. The messages were constant. It's hard for me to believe he was completely unaware of what she was doing. Maybe I'm wrong, but trust in him is completely gone. At this point, I've officially decided to start the process for filing for divorce. This isn't the man I thought I married, and after everything that's happened, I don't feel safe around him anymore. For now, I'm staying with my parents, with the kids. I don't trust him around them right now, and he has seemed accepting over this because of the affair, and he still has to work. The fact that someone who smiled in my face sat in our home and acted like my friend was secretly involved with my husband for over a year and then spent time tormenting me pretending to be him is honestly one of the most disturbing things I've ever experienced and I still can't even wrap my head around it.

1:11:57I still have this horrible feeling that there's more to the story than either of them is admitting. All I know is that I've lost all trust for him and no amount of counseling could change that. We are done. Thank you all so much for the help. I'm genuinely scared what I would have done if I didn't reach out because I never expected this from him. I don't know if there will be another update. I have a lot of recovering to do. I feel like I just lost over 10 years of my life to a lie of a man and I need to get used to the idea of starting fresh. I'm so grateful to have my family and knowing they will be here to support me and the boys through this is the only thing that brings me comfort.

1:12:34There's obviously still a lot more I have to sort out, but I'm safe now. I just want to put the safety of me and the boys first. This will be my final update. Thank you all so much. I had a feeling it was something like that. How did you know? I don't know. I think just like you literally I just watched the wheels turn and you just like you just you literally clocked it to a T. Yeah. Well, I was like, who would be sending those kinds of messages? Well, there is that one true crime case and I'm going to absolutely butcher it, but I can Google. Do you know which one I'm talking about? What is it about?

1:13:05Oh, my gosh. let me describe it to you my brain doesn't work anymore since I had a child but one woman was getting really hateful messages and I believe that oh my gosh he was like a cop and he was dating two women and one of them killed the other one but she was getting really scary messages and there's like a huge twist to it and I don't remember what the twist was at this point she went on one date one date and then bombarded him with 65 ,000 text messages yes you think you've had a bad date. I'm pretty sure it went. Nothing like this. A Phoenix man went on a date. One date with a woman he met online.

1:13:38Didn't go well. Not only was there a threat, but she blocked him. 65 ,000 text messages. Yes. Insane. Yes. And so basically I was just trying to think of like who would have been sending those kinds of messages if it wasn't him. Yeah. And it would be someone who didn't want them together. And I think the most obvious person is an affair partner. Well, it's interesting too because she tried to make it look like it was still potentially him yeah which is kind of like as an affair partner all she had to do is tell her hey your husband's having an affair for a year with me and she probably still would have been done yeah the fact that she did it this way it's almost like she did it this way because maybe she knew he was too dumb to figure it out or do anything to stop it but then it's like well he wouldn't be mad at me because she left you because she thought you were sending these messages it's almost like that plausible deniability in it all where it's like well you still love me right or i wonder if she was afraid that if even if she told the wife hey your husband's having an affair with me well yeah then the husband would be mad at her yeah and maybe would break things off with her like why did you implode my entire life yeah this affair we've been having and so maybe that's why yeah maybe she was trying to push the wife to divorce the wife like i don't trust you you're sending me these messages.

1:14:55I know it's you. Yeah. And he in his head, I just lost my phone at work. I don't know what this is. Yeah. You're not going to believe me. Well, fine. Doesn't matter. I got this other woman. Yeah. We can get divorced and I can actually go start a life with this other woman is probably what that woman was thinking. I think that's exactly what she was thinking. Yeah. Diabolical. So diabolical. Diabolical. So now that woman, I wonder if that woman's going to get what she wants, though, because the original wife is now filing for divorce. Done. I hate stories like this if the husband goes And ends up just like being with this woman I mean now that he knows Yeah true I would hope that Hopefully he's not this scummy He wouldn't be with someone like that but That's so scary I mean one of the scariest parts About the whole story too is just the idea that Yeah your husband's having an affair It's a physical thing like that sucks to hear about But he is telling this woman Everything about your children Intimate details of your life She's starting to feel maybe like parasocial with your kids because she knows so much about them.

1:15:53Oh, no, she's probably seeing your kids and planning how she's going to be their new mommy. Oh, that just makes my blood boil. That is such a violation. All of it's a violation, but there's something specifically about that of like, you know all these intimate details about my life now. It makes me sick. It's really, really upsetting. It's crazy. I'm glad she went and talked to a professional on how phones work though, because you're just going to keep getting lied to. I know. You have to go actually figure out how the phones work. Well, and iPhones can do that too. Like you can be logged in on multiple devices.

1:16:26I've had multiple phones like because I had a THT iPhone and then like my phone. You can be logged in on multiple devices. Like it's a common thing. But yeah. But WhatsApp is it's interesting. It's so I'm so glad she went in and talked to the police. Have you ever had anyone like get your number or anything or just, I don't know, text pretending to be someone else? I get a lot of scam texts now Just like this is the post office Please pay for a package Hi this is Veronica nice meeting you the other day I get that type of message a lot Toll roads the toll road scam What's that one? Oh they'll tell you you have an unpaid toll And I'm like no I don't I have a fast pass bitch Yeah but they just assume people are going to click that link And you can't click anything And then you get phished It's crazy It's just too easy these days It's really scary Everyone needs to start talking about the scams though So if we talk about the scams and what to look out for, then we know more about the scams and don't fall for them.

1:17:20Yeah, I got scam insurance. This was back because I left a job in California. We have Cobra. So Cobra reaches out to you once you lose a job, leave a job, whatever, to extend your insurance. And somewhere in between, like calling Cobra, setting this up, like a scam company called me and realized because they must have like bought some sort of list. list of people who are eligible for Cobra. And I didn't even realize because you're just talking on the phone so much and like numbers are calling you and they're saying they're from Cobra. So this one number had slipped in, in the middle of me processing my insurance or like, I guess, in between calls or something.

1:18:00They called me. I signed up for the insurance with them and it was so fast. And I felt like such an idiot. I was like, how could I not have caught this? And I called when I finally was getting real insurance. I called Blue Shield to, and I told them what happened. I was like, I got scammed. And the guy working there was like, I just started at this job. And actually, I just got scammed even applying for jobs. He's like, I feel you so much on this. Like, don't worry about it. You're not an idiot. Oh, my God. First of all, with insurance, we get a lot of people calling saying they got scammed. But he was like, I fully like interviewed online with a scam company.

1:18:34They gave me a scam job and I sent them my information and they stole like a thousand bucks from me. And I was like, you're joking. He's like, yeah, it's really scary out there. It was wild. But I think more people our age are getting scammed than would maybe admit. Like, I don't know. I've heard so many stories and they're getting smarter. It's not just our parents or like people on Facebook getting scammed. I know. I keep seeing a lot of people post on Reddit about how their parents are falling victim to the scam where like a celebrity will message them. Oh, my mom has a friend that's out$10 ,000 because she's in a relationship with Johnny Depp online.

1:19:12Yeah. No. She lives in Florida somewhere and apparently Johnny Depp has been messaging her. Literally, I like saw someone, they were like, my mom thinks she's dating Brad Pitt and has sent him like 40K. Why is Brad Pitt asking you for money? The same way that like when we were little, our parents would say like, adults never ask kids for directions. That's not, I'm like, celebrities don't ask moms in the middle of Florida for$40 ,000. Why? Like, come on. I know. But like you can talk to your parents like the one person on the subreddit was like my mom is very aware She like knows about all these other scams and blah blah blah blah But yet like she genuinely believes this and i'm like Have you had to have like the ai conversation?

1:19:51With your i'll get like tiktoks from my mom that are clearly ai and I tell her like hey just so you know This isn't a real video. This is an ai little girl And she goes you're taking the fun out of it No, she's mad at me for telling her it's ai It honestly, I just saw a video where people are like, AI is going to actually make people not want to be online anymore because it's such you don't know what to believe. And a lot of it's garbage. And so I'm like, I'm kind of excited about that potential because whatever. A return to the earth, a return to grass a little bit. Yeah. But like for me, like it's so hard to decipher.

1:20:27Like even me, I'm online a lot. Like that one bunny video with the bunnies bouncing on the trampoline. Did it get you? It got me. Yeah. A lot of them do. And it's scary. And so I even think like it's ridiculous. Like I saw this one person. It was like a TikTok sponsored ad. And they were like, this isn't even me recording the podcast. It's actually AI. And I'm like, why? Why would you put your why? You put yourself out of a job? What are you doing? What are you doing? So rest assured, I will never replicate or duplicate myself using technology. I'm always sitting in this chair. It's insane. Yeah.

1:21:02I wonder with now my son, if he's going to grow up in a world where when he opens his phone, he's like, this is the fake place. Like this is the place where nothing is real. And maybe that's healthier in a way. Because now we, you know, you open your phone and you're reading stuff. You just assume it's real. You go on Reddit or you go on YouTube and like the videos you see, you assume that they're real. But maybe one day there's going to be kind of a flipping point where just you just assume everything you see on your phone is fake. yeah that's kind of I'm like it's it's sad but I'm like I'm already getting there yeah no it is definitely heading in that direction it's insane speaking about phones and videos I've got another doozy for us all right let's do it I've got a doozy these have all kind of been doozies all of them all of them I will read okay here's the spoiler okay so that if you don't want the spoiler on that Netflix doc because I'm going to read the top comment so if you don't want it skip skip skip skip top comment on that one with 6k upvotes this reminds me of that Netflix documentary where the mom was sending texts to bully the daughter, but they didn't know it was her.

1:22:05Next comment. Oh my God, exactly. She was bullying the daughter and then comforting her and pretending to care. That was like the top comment before we got an update. No, that's exactly what I was thinking about, which, you know, the documentary poises it to be like, oh, the mom was doing this to the daughter so the daughter would need her more. But you know what they left out of the documentary, Morgan? How much the mom was obsessed with the daughter's boyfriend who was the one who's right the the texts were initially saying like your boyfriend doesn't care about you he hates you blah blah he's with me he's i'm giving him a blow job right now this is the mom texting the daughter all of this but if you read the long form article on the cut actually about this case you realize like the mom was asking the i think his name was owen the boyfriend the mom was asking owen's parents a 13 year old boy if she could come to florida with them for to go watch his sports tournament.

1:22:57The mom had started coaching his track and field team for no reason. She didn't have a son on the team. She just wanted to coach Owen's team. The mom was like constantly trying to put herself closer to this. They didn't mention any of that. They talk about it in the doc, but they briefly mentioned it in the doc. But there's a moment where they interview Owen's mom and Owen's mom says something like, I always felt like Kendra was too obsessed with my son. And then they don't really follow that path a whole lot. Oh, that's probably the most concerning path you could have followed. A lot of the parents really believed that the true heart of what the mom was doing was her obsession with this teen boy, not her desire to get closer to her daughter.

1:23:35Because she texted her daughter thousands of times, kill yourself. You don't do that when you need your daughter to rely on you. You don't like, you know, it's just so unhinged. I hope she like emancipated herself and like does not talk to her mom anymore. It's sad in the documentary you really see the daughter get closer to her mom after that because, I mean, she's 17 years old by the end of this all coming out. And what do you do when it's your parent and you've been lied to and you don't even know what's real and what's not? And I don't know if things have changed because the daughter's even older now.

1:24:11Yeah, hopefully she like, I mean, you would need some insane therapy after that. Oh my God, absolutely. Hopefully she is following that and getting therapy. Yeah. Wow. Okay, now I'm going to watch it. Now, you've got me convinced now. You have to. I mean, even though you know the spoiler now, it's still worth it. No, it's insane. I think to see that type of dynamic play out. I just want to see how she tries to genuinely be like, I was doing it because I want to see it. Yeah, you'll see it. They interview her in the documentary. She tells her side of the story. It's worth it to watch for that. Oh, my God.

1:24:45But then read the article, too, so you get the full, full scope. Yeah. I'm just like, I'm sitting here. This episode is brought to you by Nintendo. Everyone's version of me time is a little different. That's why the Nintendo Switch 2 system is so fun. With exclusive and Nintendo Switch compatible games like Mario Kart World, Animal Crossing New Horizons, Nintendo Switch 2 Edition, Tamodachi Life, Live in the Dream, or Yoshi and the Mysterious Book, there's something for every vibe. And with upgraded hardware, play at home or on the go whenever the mood hits. Learn more at nintendo.com slash nintendo switch 2.

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1:26:32Mind blown. And this next one, it's got me a little mind blown too. So this is coming from r slash off my chest, two weeks old right now, and it's titled, I sent a video that ruined my husband's life in college. My husband and I started dating in college. At the time, he was in a frat that was pretty intense, but I really didn't know the extent of what went on in there at first. They were always sus about things and had a bad rep slash people gossiping about them, but I assumed it was typical frat stuff. One night during pledging season, he came over with a couple of friends also in the frat, and they started talking about something that happened with one of the new guys.

1:27:14They were all hammered and passing a phone around, watching a video. I asked what was going on, and one of them showed it to me. It was a pledge sitting on the floor with a bunch of brothers yelling at him to keep drinking. I'm talking like chugging bottle after bottle, and he was already clearly already out of it. I recognized my husband, then boyfriend's voice as being one of the main guys in the video, the one doing the yelling, and it made my stomach drop. The next day, I found out that the kid ended up in the hospital after someone found him lying outside. It got really serious. He was very sick.

1:27:49I remember sitting in my dorm, feeling sick, thinking about it. A few days later, someone in the group chat sent the video again, and they were trying to do damage control. I don't even remember why I saved it, but I did. I stared at it for a while, and I went back and forth on what to do. I ended up anonymously sending it to the school's public safety email, and also to the kids' parents on Facebook Messenger after some research. I made a fake account, and I didn't associate it with my name anywhere. I remember shaking the whole time, and for good reason, because everything blew up after that.

1:28:25The school started an investigation, the video got around, became a big scandal, and a bunch of guys got in trouble. My husband got expelled and the frat shut down. He was devastated and furious. Nothing came of it legally. The kid didn't want to press charges slash wouldn't talk and no one else's face was shown. So I guess there wasn't enough proof. To this day, my husband is still bitter and talks about how someone snitched and ruined his life. He always says that if he ever found out who leaked the video, he would destroy them. He thinks it was one of the pledges standing up for their friend and has never suspected me.

1:29:05And yes, we actually stayed together after all of that, which probably sounds crazy. I don't know if it was my guilty conscience or what made me stay with him, but he comes from a rich family, so at least financially, his life really didn't fall apart in the way it could have. His parents set him up with different opportunities from their connections over the years. Still, he was never able to graduate college or get the kind of job that he had hoped for. The whole thing followed him around for a long time. We're married with kids now, and it's been years, but every once in a while, the topic comes up again.

1:29:41Usually when we hear about a hazing story in the news, he'll go on a tangent about how someone betrayed him and how much he hates the person. I just sit there quietly. But being a mom myself now, my mind thinks about the kid on the floor, barely conscious, with everyone laughing and keeping on forcing beers on him. If I hadn't sent the video, nothing probably would have happened. I stand by it. And if I could go back, I would do it again. And I know one thing for sure, our sons will never be allowed to join a frat. I'm so glad she sent the video to public safety and to that kid's parents. But I do fear that there's also something deeply wrong with her as well because you married this person after you know that he's capable of that.

1:30:29And I wonder if there's some sort of dynamic where she likes that she has - Control. Control. Like a secret. Yeah, oh, I have this secret where I ruined your life and I'm always going to have that over you. But also like, fuck this guy. Hazing is horrible, horrible. I'd like to say that it's better now than it has been, but I don't think that's the case. I don't know if it has gotten better. always been bad. And anyone who has that deep inside of them, that darkness that can be brought out to do that to another kid is just like so upsetting. Yeah. And you're bordering on like genuinely like a true crime kind of like behavior.

1:31:04There's been so many cases where kids have died. There was a, even in California, I believe it was California. There were two girls in a sorority that were, I want to say handcuffed to each other and then walked out into the sea and then they drowned. Because what do you think happens when you tie two people together and put them in the ocean? They die. No, this is horrific. And it's all in the name of sisterhood or brotherhood, whatever. No. They wouldn't do this to you. No. I was in a sorority. We did not. I did not have any hazing. There was no hazing in my sorority. No, same. There were a lot of really - We were in the same one, weren't we?

1:31:36Kappa? Nope, nope. I was off of V. Oh my gosh. Yeah, the little bears. Little bears. Yeah, there were really strict rules at my school about hazing and kids still got around it, figured out ways to do it to each other. But one fraternity even got kicked off of campus when I was at school for some really bad stuff that went down. It's insane. Yeah, your friends will not torture you and put you through stuff like this. Like it's insane. But yeah, I'm like, she's definitely, like there's some cognitive disconnect here to be like, I'm so happy I sent the video because he's such a horrible person. But also I'm going to marry you and have children with you.

1:32:12And I'm always going to know that I'm the one that sent the video. And again, I'm very glad she did that. I think everyone involved should have gotten in trouble. I'm sad that the kid didn't press charges, but ultimately that was up to him. Totally get that. But interesting that you married him. What is that? And now you have children. Like, how are you that disconnected? I know that's, I'm just thinking that there's something going on there. I don't know about that because, I don't know, now I'm worried for your children. Literally, same. And the top comment is very curious as well. The top comment, 750 upvotes.

1:32:45I want to know the story of why slash how you married him after knowing this. Okay, I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking that. Someone goes, he's rich and she's a gold digger. I mean, she did bring up his wealth. She mentioned. Definitely. She mentioned it. But also he's now not able to get the jobs that he wanted to get because he didn't finish his degree. And like, I think there's more to it than that. I mean, there is a comment from OP in response to the top comment. He did a huge public proposal at his birthday party with his whole family watching, so I kind of just froze and said yes. Probably on purpose, because he knew I wouldn't say no like that.

1:33:25I have felt numb inside ever since. I'm not going to feel bad for you. I don't know. We have a lot more choices in life than just, oh, it was so public that I said yes, and now I'm still married to him and also decided to have kids with him. Like, it just feels like you're not taking any accountability for any of this. No. And it doesn't show like any growth on his part if he's still festering on this. So it's like you can't even say he's grown up. He's different. He's a better person. Like, he's still like actively like if I find out who it is. Yes. He's not sad that he hurt a kid and almost led to that person's death.

1:33:59No, there's no mad that he got caught. That is a deep seated behavior that I think gets mapped onto a bunch of different behaviors in your life or like a bunch of different things that you do in your life. Right. You just are mad when you get caught. You're not upset that you actually did something horrible. And yeah, he's still that person. And you have more agency in your life, this poster, than I think you're like willing to admit. I completely agree. The comment that kind of stands out speaking to that too is like one from this person that says, your husband is a monster. And I say is, not was, because the only response or reflection on the incident from him has been rage.

1:34:38Yeah, definitely. definitely I definitely agree with that no growth like you said no and like OP has another comment here in response to someone where OP says I don't feel bad for him now I think what he did is disgusting I used to stupidly have a guilty conscience and that is what got me stuck with him but I'm playing the long game and I have a plan if it ever comes out see what the fuck does that no I know but that's what I'm saying like I'm playing the long game like there is something here. There's something she's working towards or some sort of manipulation kink that she has. I don't know.

1:35:13Do you watch that show on Hulu, Tell Me Lies? No, I haven't. I'm not caught up on it. I'm like, is this giving Steven and Lucy like what are we dealing with here? Like what are they both just like mentally unhinged? I think so. I have a plan if it ever comes out. Maybe something more to it. What does that mean? Also, what's your plan? What's your plan? Did she ever say in the comments? A lot of people are asking, like, why would you even mention the richness? Yeah, exactly. And OP is like, I thought his family being rich was important context because it shows how rich kids get away with things like this.

1:35:48It's a burner account. People are saying I'm already saying too much with the story alone, so I'm not trying to give any more details. I'm not defending him. Read my other comments. I appreciate your concern, but I'm not going to delete my post. I'm tired of holding it in, and a part of me doesn't care anymore if he finds out. I think he deserves the pain of finding out that it was someone he loves who was a traitor to him. He may have gotten off easy on this, but if he were to try anything on me, he wouldn't. Yeah. Okay. So it's also about the long game of, no, I want him to know that his entire life has been a lie and that his wife was the one that did it and that betrayal will be the punishment.

1:36:27The kids were unintentional. I'm not really attracted to my husband at all because of what he did and would choose not to sleep with him. But I have to keep the act up. Girl, get a hobby. A little bit. Do you agree that like you're wasting a lot of time on this? He does not know. He is not being punished. It's only if he would ever find out. So yeah, let that day be today. Also, he got expelled. There was at least some punishment to it. Like it's not up to you to be the judge, jury, and executioner on this one. Yes. Yeah. Get out of there. Yeah, just leave and go live your life. You know? What the fuck?

1:37:08This is really unhinged. I didn't get into the comments when I read this. I didn't think that this was going to go exactly where it went. It went there. Wow. It went there. I'm playing the long game. Oh, my goodness. Get divorced. Yeah. Get that alimony. Just get out of there. Get out of there. Wow. Wow is right. I wonder if she is going to update this ever if she goes through with her entire plan. I hope so. I'm going to start following the account. We'll see. Yeah. Get those updates. We'll see. I did message a couple of the people today asking for updates. So I sat over here. I'm like, please let me know how that went.

1:37:48Do people ever respond to you with updates that way? Yeah. Very interesting. I saw your one about the cheese. The cheese. I know how disappointing. Incinerated. But what did they say? It was like an act of vengeance. An act of someone sabotage or something. Sabotaged them by burning all the cheese. I'm like, what do you mean? What's going on there? The Department of Health sabotaged you? Yeah. With your like illegal cheese operation. I know. And I really wanted that cheese. Can anyone in Canada send me cheese? I had some comments that people were like, I live near the Oxford County Cheese Trail.

1:38:19No way. Send me cheese. Someone said, I live in Cheese Capital in Wisconsin. Send me cheese. That might be easier. I do wonder if there's going to be issues sending cheese across borders. Yeah. I know you can't send fruit. I got stopped by one of the dogs in the airport once. Really? They sniffed me out. What'd you have on you? Had a sandwich from Joe and the Juice that had a tomato in it. And you cannot bring fruit into the country. So that beagle sniffed out that tomato. You can't even bring a slice of tomato on a sandwich you bought in the airport. You cannot. no I did not know that and then they said do you have any other items in your bag and I said no and then they put my stuff through this crazy x-ray machine different x-ray than normal TSA it was nuts yeah and they found a banana and then I got even more trouble oh my gosh I forgot my mother-in-law just came and visited and she said they didn't even ask her to you can bring liquids on planes again like everyone was bringing their water bottles and she dumped hers out and they're like oh you don't have to do that anymore that seems crazy which yeah i didn't realize it's either a new rule that just got in place or i don't know huh yeah interesting so so interesting you couldn't even bring a tomato and now they're bringing full water bottles a tomato unfair apparently bugs can harbor in them and then hatch and i'm like i sure hope not because i just ate because i'm eating this one i ate that so please don't tell me that but okay going on to this next one.

1:39:44This one is coming actually from the Let's Not Meet subreddit. Good. Buckle up. It's titled, Am I Overreacting or Is My Mailman Creepy? I, 23 female, live alone in a decently nice apartment in a nice neighborhood for two years now. For the most part, the mail gets delivered to the mailboxes at the front entrance of the building. Occasionally, packages are delivered straight to the apartment doors and it's pretty convenient. Well, about a year ago, I was home from work during the day because I took the afternoon off to go to a doctor's appointment. The doorbell rang and I have a ring camera. I saw it was the mailman, so I answered.

1:40:25I have this whole exchange on video. He was maybe in his 30s, white, short, 5 '5-ish, very large glasses, really disheveled thin hair. I opened the door, smiled, and said, thanks so much, and went to take the package. He stopped and stared at me like something was wrong. So I was like, oh, did you need to take a picture of the delivery or something? And to my surprise, he said, quote, I know you. I've seen you before. And you can see on the camera, my face changes. My body demeanor gets uncomfortable. And I kind of move behind the door. I said, quote, I'm sorry, I don't think we've met. I went to shut the door, but he raises his voice and takes a step forward and said, quote, I've seen your name on your mail.

1:41:14I found you on Instagram. You're not allowed to do that, but continue. My face went white and I froze. I said, me? I was kind of like a deer in headlights. He said, yeah, you are a person of interest on Instagram for me. Your account was private, but you're pretty. I said thanks and slammed the door, locking it quickly. I was happy to know I caught the whole thing on video. I showed it to my then boyfriend, who agreed it was weird. A few days later on Saturday, he's back at my door. He rang the bell about 10 times, waiting a few minutes, just staring. Answered him through the doorbell, and I said, Hi, you can just leave any mail.

1:41:58Thanks. What he said next made me shake. He said, quote,

1:42:32mailman came. He rang the bell a few times and my boyfriend answered the door. The mailman took a step back and my boyfriend stood for a moment and they stared at each other. He realized the mailman didn't have anything in his hands. He said, can I help you? And the mailman said, quote, where's the small girl who lives here? I'm pretty petite, five feet, a hundred pounds. My boyfriend was stunned and said, quote, I live here too. From now on, leave our packages downstairs and slammed the door. I was really happy he said that because truthfully, he didn't live there with me full time, maybe two nights a week.

1:43:12It seemed to work. I didn't see the mailman again at all, actually. But then my boyfriend and I broke up a few months ago. I completely forgot about the mailman until today. I was entering my building when he was exiting at the same time. He stared at me and I went to walk by. He turned to walk after me and said, quote, hey, I haven't seen that guy in a while who used to live with you. Did he move out? I panicked and walked faster, grabbing my keys, but I lied and I said, oh, he's around. And as I entered, I quickly said, hey honey, I'm home. And I slammed my door fast. I don't know why I lied, but something told me to make it clear that I wasn't alone.

1:43:54Am I being dramatic or mean or is he creepy? He's creepy. You're not being dramatic. That is so creepy. And unfortunately, he does know where you live. That's the worst. That's the worst part. That was literally my thought. That he came to your house and to come afterwards too and be like, oh, I actually don't have mail for you. I just wanted to show up at your place and see if you're around and come inside. Can I come in for a glass of water? a glass of water help i need water so thirsty no who no that's really scary i mean i guess you you can report that person you should to yeah like i would hope that they would take him off of your route so he's not like it's already too far past because he doesn't know where you live so even if he's like taken off your route right he can just still come to your house or your apartment but like i would hope that they'd be able to take him off that route yeah they absolutely should and then like if he did come back then you have this like oh no he's stalking me and you can get a restraining order a protective order whatever it is because then it's like there's no plausible reason for him to be there no i know there's no reason he's not the mailman anymore i know oh i used to get so scared in college right like there were so many people that would like knock door to door and sell like baseball tickets or whatever like okay which always freaked me out and I lived in a house once and I remember this guy.

1:45:20Yeah, we literally came to the door and was selling baseball tickets. And I was the only one home and I don't know why I answered the front door. He looks like he was kind of my age. And it wasn't that creepy, but I remember I like closed the door. I was like, no thanks, I'm not interested, left. And then like 20 seconds later, he knocks at the door again. He's like, well, actually, I just thought you were really pretty. Like, can I have your number? I'm like, this is not what this is. I know. This interaction is done. And like, you have to go, you are also on the clock. fuck, this is totally unprofessional.

1:45:48It was just kind of weird. And I was like, and you know where I live and you know that you probably assume that I live here alone or you don't know that I have roommates. And this is just now getting really scary. I hate that. Yeah. And it's so hard. Like I, I just think like as a woman, like I'm, I'm very on edge. I'm very like kind of hyper aware of my surroundings these days. And even something that like, I was at a gas station recently and this person just like kept coming around my car and looking at my car and asking me how he liked my car and I'm just like yeah I I don't want this and I'm like I'm feeling uncomfortable I'm like what do they say like be rude yeah sort of like stay weird the crime junkie yeah yeah be rude stay stay alive something like that but it kind of is like yeah you don't you almost don't want to come off as too docile in those moments because I worry that they're now sizing you up and being like oh she doesn't fight back or like interesting i'm walking around your car to put an air tag in it oh my gosh like those two they're like the air tag of it all these days and like there's so many people on reddit finding trackers on their cars do your does your phone because my phone will let me know if there's air pods near you or following with you yeah does it is it the same with trackers yeah too it pops up pretty quickly with the air tags great i'm not sure about other ones like tile or other tracking things.

1:47:09Oh, because that's so scary. The fact that you could just like pop it under someone's car. And he was like walking around it, like going, looking at the rims. And I'm like... At your car? Where was this? Literally a gas station in Burbank. I'm like, okay, bye. He didn't... What did he ask about it? Just like... How do you like your car? That's a really nice car. Walking around. He's like... And he pointed to his truck. He's like, this is my hog. And I'm like, don't care. Get me out of here. I was going to fill it up. put 20 bucks in bye bye oh do you think he's gonna place an air tag on it or like what what do you think he's doing i don't know see like and i get we have the true crime podcast now like i'm again like you're a little paranoid you yeah i'm like that's just me i'm like i'm hyper vigilant you shouldn't have to be that way you don't have to be that way don't don't in his head he could have been just being nice trying to strike up a conversation with a stranger at a gas station or maybe we wanted to buy your car or something.

1:48:04I don't know. Who knows? Who knows? Who knows? But it just, I'm alone. I'm like not feeling the vibe. I got to go. Yeah. Not looking to have a conversation right now. I don't want to assume the worst, but it's easy to be made to feel uncomfortable. Yeah. But I do think sometimes you just catch a vibe with someone and you're like, oh, I probably shouldn't be here just like talking to this person. I even, yeah, my husband has kind of like talked to me about that because I do think sometimes I will sit and talk to a person and not really think twice about it. Yeah. But there's been times where Matt has been like, should you have sat with that person?

1:48:39It's funny. So like, actually, it's not necessarily, I know I'm being like so vague. It's not even really about people being creepy. But one time he was like, we were, I was having a conversation with someone and he was like, telling me about how him and his wife were open and they're like, they were trying to get you. And I had no idea that's what it was. And I told Matt and he was like they were trying to sleep with you so like let me tell you about the situation and I was like oh okay now I can see flattered but like in in the moment I was like there's no way it just like totally went over my head I thought they were just like telling me about their lifestyle and I was like oh cool interesting yeah like you're so curious you're such a curious person yes yes and it just went over your head tell me more this is so and he's like Caitlin and you're being a little nice we were just trying to sleep with you like it's fine just next time next time it to be aware that's what's happening yeah so that's fair so i guess yeah it's less so like oh this person was trying to take you and more like this person was trying to seduce you i guess that yeah called me out on not being aware of this person though definitely he's being creepy yes and i think talking to the post people and getting him off the route yeah is a good idea i think so too and we get updates great update i took everyone's advice thank you all so much i decided to reach out to the super of my apartment and explain the situation and show him the videos.

1:50:00He said he will implement a new policy that male personnel are not permitted to walk around the complex. Great. Simply go to the designated mail room and leave. I also got a large men's work boot to put them outside my door. People were like, grab work boots, male looking work boots, and put them outside your door. I did have the thought when he was like, oh, does your boyfriend lived there I would have been like yes he just got out of prison for murdering mailmen and he's back home and he lives with me now really just talking about I do like the idea of having like the work boots or just something unfortunately because okay so there was that um case just around here of the apartment complex where a person had wandered in and they were specifically looking at doors that looked like women lived there they were looking at the doors with the flowers and the wreaths that were nicely curated and clean looking mats yeah so unfortunately as a woman, it maybe does behoove you to dirty it up a little bit outside, make it look like a real, like, I don't know, workman lives there.

1:51:00Yeah. From Goodwill or a thrift store. It's so sad that you have to do that. Walk through a puddle, pop them outside. Just make it really dirty outside. Honestly, down. But yeah, it's like, again, the fact that we need to do this. I know. Second update. Wow. I wasn't expecting so many people to care about my story. Thank you, everyone. I took the advice and everyone telling me this isn't acceptable and I decided to call the postmaster. I sent them the video recordings I had and they assured me they will be looking into the matter as well as assigning a new mailman to my route. I also made sure to go down to my local police precinct and file an incident report and they have the videos as well.

1:51:38Thank you, everyone. Also, I'm flattered. So many people are concerned and I'm getting a lot of requests to post the videos. Considering I'm in them and it shows my apartment and this is still ongoing, I prefer not to post them publicly. Fair. If anyone thinks they have experienced the same thing with him, please DM me and I'll send the videos privately, just not on a public forum. Which again, I don't know. People online don't, I don't know. I wouldn't send anyone the videos. No, me neither. Or like literally take a screen grab of him and send it to them if they think it's the same guy. Yeah, but you just don't want your apartment number and you're already having issues with people coming to your apartment.

1:52:14No, I totally get that. Isn't that crazy though? Yeah. You're so on it today. The postmaster, man, you knew, you knew all this changed the route. I know. Yeah. Yeah. See, I feel, I guess just, you know, call the manager, if you will, just try to talk to someone who can help you sort this out. And usually it's like their supervisor, whoever's in charge there, but I'm glad she did that. I, of course, I would also be nervous about making this person mad. But I think that's just like our instinct sometimes as women like, oh, don't make the person mad because that's going to make it worse. Like, let me just placate until it ends.

1:52:49Yeah. I mean, that's not going to help you here. It's now being more talked about where there's everyone has heard fight or flight. That's like so common. But there's also fawn, which is kind of that placate someone and freeze. Yeah. And so there's so many different reactions that you can have in these situations. No one is more right or wrong than the other. Yeah. It's scary. Your body, I mean, it's just, it takes over. I feel like fawn and freeze are the only feelings I've ever had in those situations. I've never been in a high stress situation where my instinct was to fight someone or to turn around and run away.

1:53:24I feel like I always just am like frozen in place or I'll try to make the situation better. So no one's upset. And then that usually gets me into trouble yeah yeah there's only one time where i turned around to try to instantly swing at the person really yeah i was like walking down the street and someone like i was wearing a romper and they reached up the romper and grabbed my ass no and i immediately just turned around like good for you but they were a lot quicker and we were already like already up the street like i'm so sorry motherfucking bitch yeah it's just crazy i'm so sorry but it's like that's how like it can just, I'm like, oh.

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1:55:17Also why I'm also so probably paranoid these days. Yeah, that's true. That's true. But okay, I've got one last one for us. Okay, excellent. It is a ghost scary story that's real. Thank goodness. So if you don't like the ghosts and you don't want to be scared or if you're listening late at night, goodbye. We shall end here. Good night. It's been so great to have you. But I think you're going to be into the little spooky I got. I'm excited. So this is coming from r slash ghosts. And it's five months old. It's titled, what is that one story that not only made you believe in the paranormal, but also sends chills down your spine to this day?

1:55:57And I'm not talking about I heard something move in the kitchen. I mean something so disturbing. Love it already. And I will say like every single comment on this post like is so believable and like not like disturbing, disturbing. I'm not going to go there. So like, don't shut us down now if you did give it a chance because it's so good. Yeah. But I want to post the link because there's other comments on there from people that I want you guys to read. And maybe I'll post them on Instagram, but I'm only reading the one. So this is a personal experience. I had a friend when I was little, probably age seven to 10, given how well I remember her.

1:56:43She was older than I was with long brown hair. She always wore the same thing, black jeans and a red polo shirt. She would just show up and play with me, usually Barbies. We would play together for hours, and then she would tell me she had to go, and she would leave. One night when I was 10, I woke up and one of my Barbie dolls was standing on my dresser, and her little purple plastic brush was going up and down through her hair. I couldn't see anyone holding it, but I somehow knew it was my friend. I sat up in bed, and I sternly told her that I didn't like what she was doing and that she was scaring me.

1:57:23The brush stopped. The Barbie laid down and all was quiet. I laid back down and I went to sleep. I never saw my friend again. I spoke to my parents about it a few years later and while my mom was incredulous, my father confirmed that he had seen her too. But they both told me without question that she was not a real person. Fast forward approximately 10 years, and I'm moving out of my childhood home. I'd already been gone for a couple of years, but I hadn't actually moved my things out. The day after I had mostly cleaned out my room, my dad called me and said, quote, I have kind of a weird request for you.

1:58:05Could you come by and tell your friend that you're all right? I was taking a shower and I saw her walk through the bathroom and then your bedroom door opened. I called out to her, but I don't think she listens to me, end quote. So I did. I went home and I went to my old bedroom and I could smell her. My room smelled like incense, despite none having ever been lit in there. I sat down in the middle of the room and just talked for a while. I told her I wasn't sure if she could hear me, that everything was okay, and that I had moved into a nice apartment near my new job. I told her about my new job.

1:58:45I told her about how old I was, just in case she never knew. I thanked her for being my friend, and I told her I was sorry about how our friendship ended, that I never forgot her, and I found some comfort knowing that she was still there. I told her that my parents were moving soon, so I probably wouldn't be back to this house ever. I told her I didn't want her to be lonely, that I hoped if she wants to move on, she can now. Then I stood up, turned off my light, said goodbye, and shut the door. I headed down the hall to tell my dad the deed was done, when all of a sudden, my bedroom door clicked back open, and I heard a very clear, see ya.

1:59:26I turned around to look, decided to leave the door open, and I waved. I'm 36 now, and I had my daughter last year. One night, early in the newborn trenches, I was operating on almost no sleep and just rocking the baby quietly in the dark when I got the urge to talk to her. I introduced my baby out loud and I talked about my birth experience. I told her how old I was now and how I was told I couldn't have children, but here we are. And I heard her laugh, sigh, and whisper like she was trying not to wake the baby. Beautiful. I haven't spoken to her since, but I still think about her. Why am I crying over a ghost, you guys?

2:00:11Here's the thing is I read that sub all the time. So I had read that story. Oh my God. But there's something about being just, I don't know, reading it again. Did you read the top comment on it about the meow puzzle? No. Okay. I don't want to read it because I don't want it to like mess you up having a new baby. It's like about the loss of a young child. Oh no. And so I was like, I'm not doing that to you today. Yeah, I don't know if I can do that right now. I'm like, no. But the top comment on it is like so good. So I'll, I'll like read it for a social post and you can go listen to it on Instagram.

2:00:42But it's just so insane that like, this is almost like her guardian angel. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I've talked about it on Heart Sides Pounding, but I have a lot of nurses that listen to the show. Yeah. People who work at hospitals just have the most amazing ghost stories. They all, I feel like, have seen paranormal things. but a lot of the nurses talk about like when kids pass away or as unfortunate as it is but there's like little kids that have like friends they'll describe being friends with kids that have also been in that hospital but have passed away yeah like they're all each other's guardian angels and there's something about I don't know like was this a little girl that lived in the house before or and that was her friend and now she's older and she's still connected to her it's really really beautiful.

2:01:31I know. Just insane. And like she followed this person like from one house to another, has been quietly sitting there. And then like you're in the newborn trenches, which I'm sure you can relate to right now, just like rocking the baby like sleep. Yeah. And you just feel this urge. And all of a sudden you hear a laugh, a sigh and a whisper. Beautiful. Like what? What? What? There is something about, and I'm gonna cry. The first few weeks of having a baby, I think I just spent a lot of time, oh my God, I'm crying. But you spend a lot of time thinking about like the people that just aren't there anymore.

2:02:11Like there is something about having a new life where you think about the people that aren't there to experience it with you too. And I just like have felt them so much. I had an aunt who passed away when I was pregnant and I would text her every single update about the baby. Every single time I got a picture, I would send it to her. She wanted to be so involved. And she was older, so there's always a chance that they're just not going to make it to the baby being born. But I guess I had never really thought about that. And then one day I got the call that she had passed away. And in my mind, I was like, no, she's been such a part of this every step of the way.

2:02:47What do you mean she's not here anymore? That's impossible. and she would text me every single month on the 16th because my birthday is february 16th so she would always say like happy sweet 16 and or and just like and that's when we would catch up and stuff and so like the 16th of every month i feel like i don't know i just like feel her like when i'm up late with the baby or i don't know just just i just feel her so much with the baby too like i know that she was there that she was it's not like oh she's not gonna be part of this process anymore. Like she was even more part of the process after that, you know.

2:03:20It's really special. It's beautiful that you have that connection. Yeah. Did you have you gotten anything on the 16th of a month yet? Um, no, I guess there's only been two. He was born on the 14th. So the first 16th was just wild because we had just brought him home and I was like, what is even happening? Like they sent me home with this little thing. We talked about that yesterday. The fact that like you literally just have a baby and they just like send you off like, okay bye now bye and you're like what do i do they're like google it because even some of the nurses too are like hey so like someone was telling me that um the baby had like a blowout diaper or something and so they called the nurse because they're like what do we do and the nurse was like hey so like i'm not going to be at home with you so you're going to have to figure out what to do because i'm not going to change all your baby's diapers right now and then you don't know how to do it when you get home so like you guys figure this out yeah which is what you do need to be told because you do have to start figuring out maybe a little tough love but not that tough i'm still healing i know i know it's like you still can't get out of bed and the nurse is kind of like yelling at you i only got you for two three days if i'm lucky like i know help me while i'm here and like i'm paying a lot to be here so can you help me out oh yeah i got that bill oh my gosh okay so hasn't happened yet and i always like i talk about it on the podcast when we do the spooky stories i'm like if you have lost someone and you're waiting for a sign like it it will probably come like yeah it just hasn't happened yet like don't get discouraged they have a lot of people that they're trying to send signs to you're on the list it could come years later yeah they just got up there let them you know have a margarita or two like let them chill it's like pretty good up there so let them hang out for a bit yeah they'll get to you when they get to you no i i do say that too because um i do hear from people i talk a lot about signs on hard size pounding because some of the a lot of the ghost stories are people getting signs from loved ones and I always and it always breaks my heart but I do get comments of people being like my dad passed away and I still haven't gotten a sign which breaks my heart most people I talk to have like felt something or seen something and it's just a matter of time and you have to be open to it too and you have to you know be looking out for stuff absolutely I love when you guys share your personal stories in the comments there's one that's coming to mind from a past paranormal episode where someone was like, after my friend passed, I would take food over to their dad's place.

2:05:41Like I would make sure he had meals. I'd always pop in, whatever. And I would never accept any money from him. And, you know, it was odd because before that I had lost my wallet. And so after, you know, after I brought him all this food and I wouldn't take any money, I got a call from the police that they had found my lost wallet. And in the wallet was enough money to cover what I had bought my friend's dad. That to me, I'm like the ghost of your friend or the spirit or whatever, found your wallet, like divine intervention. It's just insane. So I'm like, I love hearing your personal story. So drop any in the comment.

2:06:19Yeah, me too, me too. I'm so curious what people are gonna say. Well, and go bombard Kaylin with them too, right in. Yeah, you can send heartsoarspounding.com. We love getting ghost stories. We read a lot of ghost stories. We have an episode with Morgan out that's all ghost stories from listeners. And there were some really freaky ones. People go into Catholic summer camps and like a whole bunch of bad stuff going on there. Oh my God, I know. Yeah, I love the listener ghost stories. I say this, that like every time I make a call for listener ghost stories, part of me is like, I hope I don't get any because I hope nothing scary is happening to the audience.

2:06:51And then my audience continually proves that like just the scariest stuff keeps happening to them. So if you go over there, maybe just write like from THT and then maybe I can selfishly hear them too. Yes, yes, yes. And so that way I'll know. Yeah, I love that. Yeah, please do. I love reading your stories on my show. But where can people find you? People can find me everywhere at Heart Starts Pounding. YouTube, listen to the show wherever you get your podcasts. And then I'm also on Instagram, TikTok at Heart Starts Pounding. And if you want more of us together, we've got our podcast called Clues.

2:07:23We've done some really good episodes. Like the three we did this week are such good episodes to highlight. One case that's sticking with me still is my Treece Richardson, who was a young black woman that went missing here in L.A. And we implemented this thing called the botched board that just kind of highlights inadequacies of cases. And this one was botched. So botched. So botched. What started as a woman having a mental health episode turned into a whole missing persons case. one of the most devastating stories I've and also most preventable stories I've ever read about so preventable so if you want more of that head that way but thank you guys so much for being here and until next time bye

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