3 parenting decisions we changed our minds on, ChatGPT Barbie & baby proofing the house

33:28Yes. Um, but ultimately that's okay. And there was, there's been some nights where she's wide awake. Yep. Wide awake in the middle of the night. And that's been funny too. And some that she sleeps right through. So I feel like that's a good topic one, Jules. Good. Okay. All right. Now the next one is combo feed. And this is not something we necessarily flip-flopped on, but something that we knew we were going to introduce, just not at the right time. So my goal initially was to pump or breastfeed for six months. Then I got to the six-month mark. and where I flip-flopped was I said, you know what, I want to keep going.

34:07I want to keep pumping and I want to keep breastfeeding her. Where it became really hard on me was month three and four. Where it became easy on me was after that where I just adjusted my mindset and I was like, this is part of my day. My body almost likes doing it now and I'm also afraid of the hormone dip that I know lies on the other side because I hated pregnancy. My hormones were all over the place. I had some postpartum depression, some postpartum anxiety. Around four months, my hormones really leveled out. And so I didn't want to rock the boat at six months because I heard whenever you stop breastfeeding, like your hormones can take one way or the other.

34:46So that combined with like, I was like, I'm liking this. And when am I ever going to get to do this again? I mean, it'll be the next kids that I get to do it, but it's like a, it's a finite amount of time. And I was like, my heart wants to keep going. So I kept going around. So we're 10 months in now. And I would say she's 80, 20, 80 % breast milk, 20 % combo feed formula. I love the buy heart packets. We take them with us everywhere. That is not an ad, um, at all. We tried a bunch of different formulas. I love the buy heart ones. She likes buy heart. So it's been really nice. Um, knowing like if If we're going to dinner or something, I don't have to come home and pump.

35:27Like I'm so down some days at 60-40 formula. Like I'm not very rigid on it, but I do produce like 80 % of her milk. What would you say? A couple observations here. Okay. on the first six months I couldn't believe like how much effort that took because the first six months you were exclusive breast milk she didn't have any formula and like it I mean I was blown away every day at like just the workload that it put on you and I just like appreciated or had so much like respect for how you handled that. But like I could see the toll that it took on you. But can I add something? At many different times.

36:30Yeah. While you're saying this because I'm remembering it now. Yeah. The reason it got easier was my deemer stopped. And I think that's because at the four month mark when I say my, I started working out at four months, my hormone, the postpartum depression stopped at four months. And so did the deemer, which was when my milk dropped. I used to get angry and sad and depressed. And I would be like, the last thing I want to do is strap this pump to me. But then that ended. Yeah. But, but I also just like, you know, the, the times where you'd be at events and you'd like, you know, leave to make sure she'd get enough milk.

37:04And like, It was a lot and it was obviously a decision you made. I think though that I've seen in the past four months since you switched to combo feeding, just like a level of stress removed from you. And because like you just know it's always there. and um i want to be so careful with what i say because like you know this is you know obviously so much of parenting can be like split up 50 50 but like there are certain things that can't and i think when it comes to breastfeeding it's like super important for the person not doing it to remain on the sideline as a support, um, as like a, uh, as a, uh, as a support network versus like dictating what, what should or shouldn't be done.

38:07Um, but I, I guess what I'm just trying to say is like, I saw how hard the first six months was on you. Um, I totally understand why you would, why you why you wanted that path um and it makes a lot of sense to me i also understand why a lot of women wouldn't go that path 100 get it um but i've noticed in the six months in following that six months going that 80 20 the amount of stress it appears to have taken off on you yeah if it is did what i just say because like you you're not glued to it you can miss it what i just say land yeah I have a question yeah and we can get it if you don't like it but like do you wish that you started combo feeding earlier great question no I don't I I think with baby number two I'll probably do it differently but I loved the way I did it because it it was like rewarding to me if that makes sense and I you know me I like to hit a goal if I set a goal I like to hit the goal and it never became too much.

39:16It was always like within my window of control and I could tell when things start to get, if it's pushing me too far, I will stop it. But no, I'm glad, like I'm going to look back at her one year birthday and I'm going to say like, I'm really glad I did it the way I did it. I like that question. Do you have any other questions? No. Okay, I have some other things I want to say. Do you want to say why you did the first six month exclusively breast milk? I just want to say if somebody formula feeds from day one, I 100 % get that. If somebody breastfeeds exclusively for the first two years, I also get that.

39:53I'm just sharing my journey, so I have to do my little disclaimer. But one thing that I want to say was somebody asked me, how do you drop the night feed or the night pump, right? Because your boobs fill up and like you're supposed to drain them, right? And the way, the one thing that was taking a toll on me was the night pump. and it was in Hawaii. Harrison came to me and he was like, you're done night pumping. Like you have to sleep through the night because I would get up in the middle of the night and I was, so I wouldn't sleep. And I was always tired and it takes a toll on you in the middle of the night when you're up by yourself for 30 minutes, like pumping.

40:25And then you have to go wash the pump parts, dump the bottle. Like it's this whole song and dance and it's every, you still, you don't get as good sleep because you're waiting on your boobs to wake you up. And so that was a pivotal time that allowed me to keep going because that made my pumping journey so much better. That was advice from my sister, by the way. Yeah, I think your sister told you, like, make her stop doing the night pump. And guess what? I want to be careful with the words, make her, but suggest. Yeah, suggest, suggest. No, of course, your sister's the absolute best. But the funny thing about it was I produced the same amount, if not more, in the morning.

40:57Yeah. Yeah. We saw a video of a girl who, she was like three weeks in postpartum, and she was pumping in the middle of the night. And her husband came in and he just like sat down with her and he was like, babe, I love you. We're putting the pump up and we're moving to formula. And she was recounting it at six months. And she was like, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. And so I think that those are really powerful moments when somebody steps in and says like, hey, this is doing you a disservice. And Harrison and I had a lot, a lot of candid conversations where he would check in with me.

41:30I tried to do that twice. Yeah. To which you said, no, this is the journey I've laid out and I want to continue on that journey. Well, and I always said I'm going to quit on a good day. If I'm going to hang up the pump, I'm going to hang up the pump on a good day. But like I like doing it. What I do is I think I totally – I think the way you describe that is totally how I've seen it. Those – what I'm referencing to is like they're on the down days and on the moments when I've gone to you and just let you know like, okay, like there is the other option. There's no judgment. Well, of course there's no judgment.

42:07Like I love the other option. Let's talk about skims. You guys, I am wearing a skims tank top right now. I have them in three colors. I'm obsessed with everything skims. Think about the bra, the underwear, the strapless bra I just got. But you guys, the thing about the underwear I want to specifically double click on is before skims, underwear was always an afterthought for me. I would focus more on what I was wearing on the outside and I would think about a new dress, a new jacket that would make me feel my best. But with Skims, it has made me realize that the bra and the panty I put on in the morning is actually what defines whether I'll feel amazing in my clothes because they are so comfy that they almost disappear.

42:43And there's no coming home being like, I can't wait to take my bra off because you know what? It doesn't even matter that I'm wearing one because that's how comfortable it is. I have the fits everybody thong that I'm obsessed with. I have it in onyx. I just got it in the nude cream color because I want to wear it with all my dresses and I don't want the black ones to be see-through. I have every bra from the collection and I have a million tanks. I also have their boxers. So I'm just a complete Skims fanatic at this point. Shop my favorite bras and underwear at skims.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you.

43:15Select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop-down menu that follows. That's skims.com. So that's the other area that I flip-flopped and it was I was going to do six months. Now I'm trying to go for the year. And I would say with almost complete certainty, unless my pump supply dries up, I'll hit the year mark because. Feels like you found your stride with this combo, with this combo feed. Totally. And like Julie and P come over a lot. Right. And I think they probably used to see me be like, oh, like I could not go and get the pump. Like it just, I was like, ah, but then one day I was just like, wait, I like reframed my mindset on it.

43:48And I was like, I love this. Now I do it four times a day. And it's like, I think it's cool. And also now like if you're busy, And you don't have time to get your pump in. You just pick, all right, perfect. Do the formula. Yeah, I just say, do the eight ounce bottle of formula. Like no problem. And like that I'd noticed was like something that would really get to you. It's like, you'd be being productive. You'd be doing something. And then you'd be like, fuck, I need a pump because she needs to eat because you were just enough her. Right, just enough her pump her. Good use of the word just enough her.

44:15But yeah, now the worst thing that happens is like my boobs really fill up. And it's just like, whatever. Like I can survive that. And I'll say this, if you're newly postpartum, I never thought all these moms would tell me like it'll get better. It'll start. It'll stop hurting less. Like you'll your production will like level out. And I was like, no, it won't. Like I'm different. No, it won't. And it did. And so just know like your boobs will hurt less. They will fill up more and it'll be OK. And so it all it all works out. OK, let's move on to the next one. OK, the next one is Harrison said early on he didn't care if he missed any of Tate's firsts.

44:48Like, for instance, her first clap. He's like, I'll see her do it at some point. would you like to change the way you feel about that yeah i it's um

45:04it's okay to just say you freaking love seeing the first and you want to be there for him totally being the first seeing the first is amazing um but it's almost it's almost just like Like seeing the day-to-day development change is what's one of the most special things that I've ever experienced. And it's taken it to the point – like I almost want to kind of rephrase that statement, right? And it's like to me one of the biggest changes has just been the emotional change, right? And emotionally where I was at two to four weeks in versus where I'm at today. okay will you expand on that so like two weeks in i flew to la for a work thing or was it three weeks in give or take i don't remember but like pretty early on i left for the night for a work thing i like don't think i would leave now because you don't want to miss because i just like don't want to miss anything with her like i like my attachment to her day-to-day growth is so high is does that make sense okay yes and here's why i think in my opinion like to be clear like that was a a high priority work trip no it's but i just i would like it and i've still gone on work trips and i still am going on work trips it's just like there's a feeling about like when i left before i didn't my this is actually when i left before i was thinking about you and like you taking on the roles and responsibilities yourself.

46:46I wasn't thinking like, you know, is what's, what is, what's happening with her and how is she changing? And what is she, does she need me? And now I feel differently. It's like, if I'm gone for a day or two, it's like, how has she changed? Is she missing me? Like, does she need me? Obviously I'm still like thinking about you and what you need, but like, there's just a total change in like the emotional connection. And that was something that one of my mentors said to me at birth was he said, Hey, like when the baby comes out, you know, very, very, and I may have shared this before, but like, don't, don't be nervous if like day one, she looked very likely will have an unbelievable connection with this child because she just carried it for nine months.

47:37Do not be concerned if that connection is not there out of the gates. And I thought it was there. You were saying the baby will have an unbelievable connection with the mom, but as the dad, don't be concerned if you don't feel a connection. And I, in the first two to four weeks thought we had a connection and I felt a connection, but the connection today is so different than the connection two to four weeks in. At 10 months. So 10 months is a lot different than two to four weeks in. I think in months zero to three, you obviously love this baby more than anything you've ever loved before, but they're not responding back to you.

48:15Additionally, you're trying to catch up to the fact that like your life will never be the same, right? Like sleeping is off and you're digesting like this is my new normal. Okay. And it's your brain has to catch up. Then fast forward to 10 months, you're like, they're smiling at you. They're clapping at you. They smile when they see you, they hug you. It is the most rewarding feeling on the planet. And also you've had 10 months with this little thing and you've watched it grow from six pounds to 19 pounds, you know, and you've watched her develop. And I think the attachment definitely strengthens and yeah, you don't want to leave that.

48:55Yeah. I was also really scared in those first, like four weeks, plus minus maybe four to eight weeks because like it was so new and i i didn't understand her at all right and today obviously it's all so new and we have a lot to learn right but i understand her in a meaningfully different way like we were talking about earlier with the cries yeah like yeah you do you learn you get to know your very different very different cries yeah yeah so that okay so that's the flip flop is missing the first um Harrison used to think that doesn't matter and now you would like to officially say on the record you don't want to miss them yeah and I it's not I didn't think they didn't matter but like you thought you'd see him when you saw him bad take no it's okay the right to change um and then the last and I said that yes okay Jules bought found the clip so funny you're like oh I saw her do it like the second time it was rolling over that's right it was rolling i saw it 20 minutes later when i got home yeah yeah yeah and and and i think that like yeah i the the emotional connection with her is like has continued to grow and um yeah i still like won't like kick myself if i miss something because inherently in life we're going to miss something that's part of life but that's interesting yeah isn't that funny let's move on to our bicker of the week which we encountered this morning bicker of the week is where do you park in a crowded parking lot my answer you park in the first space you see where your car can fit and by fit you mean like if you had this far to open the door like doesn't matter you're parking there yeah if you can get out of the car my answer is like i will park so far away and i prefer a parking spot that's on the end where there's only one car beside me and then i'll park over on the line where there's no car beside me love it doors can swing wide open like parking with you is like solving a puzzle it is truly like solving puzzle today we go into we go to our workout we pull into the parking lot and there's a spot when i go in two cars beside it pretty tight 100 where i'd normally go but you know alex is in the car i want to avoid the bicker so i keep driving and i see an open three spots i pull right in the middle she's like nope can't park here i don't say i'm like why and she's like because now we're leaving it up to chance we are you don't know how now you've got two cars beside you that are gonna park there and they could park so close to you so like what do we need six open spots she's like go back and go to the first one the first one was was the the two cars and the first one had parked on the opposite side of the lines so that one was wide open i'm sitting there just I mean, it is like 8.05 in the morning.

52:18And as we're sitting there having this conversation, I pull in and out like three times. I'm perfectly in the middle. Two cars just, she's like, it's a bicker. So we got to talk about the bicker. She's like, if we get a door ding, I feel bad. But I was hearing it. as I'm hearing it, two cars zip in right beside us, leaving so much room. Yeah, they did good. Nailed it. And I was just like, do I get some recognition or apology? And she's just like, for what? No, no, no. But number one, I don't say it mean like that. I don't. Harrison, why are you looking like that? I don't say it mean. It's a bicker.

53:05I know. But the bicker is I don't want a doording. And I think a lot of people can agree with that. Okay. It's okay to not want the doording. How many doordings have I got? I don't know. I've never seen your cars. Zero. Never got a doording. I've never got a doording. That's a lie. I've never noticed a doording. That's so true. And I'm a thorough guy. Per your words. You're not very spatially aware though. Thank. I'm so. So mad at you for saying that. Jules, you just ended me. Because Jules has never heard me say this. I'm so mad at you. I'm thrilled. I have been saying. You don't know what you just did.

53:52You don't know. It's like saying that she sees me secretly eat cheese. It's the equivalent of that. Yeah, that's literally the equivalent. Literally the equivalent of like, I'm always like, man, your spatial awareness is like off. you ever heard it just randomly say that okay you know what i was gonna say after this you were mean to me about the parking no problem but this is where i need like we need a teen naked market to hire jewels because i need to start getting some love here you get plenty of love it's a bad time to say i agree with alex about parking far away do you really oh shout out to my mom she taught me you don't need a gym membership if you just park far away you get your steps in thank you my little cousin my mom takes my little cousin to shop every week and my little cousin complains like why is she why do you always park so far away you get your steps in you take the furthest parking spot when your mom was in town kathy what'd she say she's like i'm with alex we park far away we do not want door dings i love a spot where i can fly my doors wide open like and then especially with a car seat like just i don't want and if i go to target like i am in the last spot i love the walk to i am the closest spot to the door we saw a car the other day i i don't think this van could get its door open and i was like i cannot believe they parked like that harris was like what's wrong with it and i was like they literally can't get their door open i mean we could end the episode there but technically we need to do things we DM'd.

55:27Yeah. Yeah, we do. Okay. So I DM'd you. Wait, so I guess to wrap it up. Who won last week's Bicker of the Week? We didn't do Bicker of the Week last week. That's right. Oh, okay. What about the week before? I think that was when I lost. No, I've never won. What was it the week before? I've never won. Oh, was it restaurants? One second. One second. we're just going to need to pick one that like, we know I win for next time. But so do you want to just like summarize this week's picker of the week? Yes. This week's picker of the week is, do you park in the closest parking spot, even though the cars are really tight?

56:11Or do you park really far away, knowing that you're not going to get a door ding, knowing you're going to get your steps in? What do you do? Do you park close? Do you park far? Yeah. And I think far and away, ironically, I think you park as close to the place you're going as possible. You squeeze in and you just kind of shimmy out of your car. The last one was how do you save contacts in your phone? Yes. And honestly, it was pretty divided. Yes. Okay, that's fair. Yeah. A lot of people were on this train, which I think both of you were on, is like you save how you know someone. Yeah. At least somewhere.

56:43Royce Wood floors. Yeah. Yeah. So you remember. I was thinking all my babysitters, what's nice now is when somebody asks me for a babysitter, I just type in babysitter and then I find what are you doing what are you doing wait what was that I've never seen that what was that you look like an alien did you see that what were you doing I was adjusting my hat and it got caught on my forehead you guys you can you do it again no that was an out-of-body experience

57:15I just looked over at Harrison's skin Was like pulling his eyes Let's go to things we do You are such a unique creature That's the only way I can describe you What were you doing last night It was just cracking me up I just felt like you were pacing all around the house But nothing was getting done And it was so funny to watch I took Bubba to the pool Yeah you did You took Bubba to the pool You weren't even home last night I know, but then when I got home, you were running rampant. You called me on the way home and you're like, I need you to come home and look at all these things. Oh, because I set up our bed that looks like crap.

57:50People were commenting saying, I did think that the pillows now that they say look like wheat thins. Not wheat thins. Wheat cereal. Frosted flakes. Frosted flakes. Swing and a miss. Okay, things we DMed. I DMed you that Barbie has teamed up with AI and they're going to start making Barbies that can respond to kids and they're going to be interactive. There was two things on the point, though, that I screenshotted that I wanted to discuss with you. Okay. Number one is, okay, according to Common Sense Media, nearly 70 % of children under 12 interact with AI tools weekly. That was like way more than I thought.

58:27Sorry, repeat that statistic. I just sidetracked myself. nearly 70 percent of children under 12 interact with ai tools weekly okay that is shockingly high i know now the other thing is this okay so is this poses the question right because eventually barbie's going to be able to have like a personality and she's going to be talking back to your kids so what this article was saying is it poses the critical question who programs these personalities whose worldview is embedded whose children are absorbing consciously or not from these interactions, which I think is important. It's an important thing to think about.

59:05Well, you could – I assume what they will do is they will tie the toy to the parent's account. And that way they can interact with what the AI has learned about the parent. i think that's too dicey i think it's too abstract what i like what do you mean like what do you well what if ai okay so ai gathers that mom and dad are always googling have you ever asked ai i an important thing is it's open ai who owns chat gpt correct yes yes yes so i guess could link that seems like lofty though i agree no i i totally disagree it seems too risky to assume our personalities based on what we what we google chat i asked chat gbt to write a letter to to my younger self and it understood me in a like in a very deep way do you want to read us the letter at some point i'll read the letter i'm just floored by that yeah i think that's really cool that you did that yeah so would you be okay if chat gbt like i mean we're gonna call it chat Would you be okay if chat took the free will of responding to Bubber?

1:00:27Like if Bubber was asking Barbie questions like, hey, I don't know. What's an example?

1:00:40So the short answer is yes. the long answer is getting the right security and parameters in place around that interaction is going to be critical to me ultimately being comfortable with it yeah because what if what if chat gives her an answer that you're not okay with is that or do you sign a waiver and like But it's hard because, you know, I'm a very open person and I obviously like there's the safety perspective. But I do think it's important for her to hear differentiating opinions and differentiating views. and um i don't you know we don't really operate i think both of us very proudly like as a you know kind of our way or the highway and i we i take immense pride in how open we are to to to listening to different perspectives and opinions and um with the right guardrails in place I think that that will be important for her I think it will be important for her to disagree with us I think it will be important for her to learn from different perspectives I feel like with Siri when you ask it like an opinion based question it tells you it can't answer it ChadGBT can this is my problem with it Barbie is something that has no personality and it's left entirely up to your imagination and since Barbie can't talk to you, your imagination is able to run wild with who Barbie is, who your dolls are, and you live in a magic land.

1:02:33Hold on, let me finish. And I think when you add in any area where she can respond to you, it actually minimizes and it shrinks your imagination. And you're going to ask her so many questions and some of them she's going to be able to answer, some of them she's not going to be able to answer. And so that's going to suck the imaginary part out of it for me. where I like it is if somebody was mean to you and you didn't feel safe talking to your parents you'd probably feel safe talking to your Barbie that could respond to you and I actually think like that could be a cool thing but then it poses the question will it send an alert to the parents of like hey you know like do you see the diciness there like what if a kid's being bullied and it tells it's Barbie AI but like it doesn't do anything about it so there's I I kind of want to add one like i wasn't thinking about this as barbie i was thinking about this as toys okay and i was thinking about this as like toys not like for for uh for kids for of of a wide age gap right so if we're zeroing in on like much younger kids then uh so i'm more like thinking about this thematically as in toys talking to children that that's what i was saying before when it comes to like going barbie and going younger yeah like that's where i think having the right guardrails the right privacy the right uh security is going to be very important so that way if red flags come out of concern the parents do get awareness and i think like ultimately that will will be what makes it either, you know, a massive net positive to society or massive debt negative to society.

1:04:19So like, yeah, I think it's critical for our children's imagination to flourish, but I also think it's critical for them to have the inputs that allow their imagination to, um, to, to flourish and for them to learn and so um i'm inherently a technology believer and so when things like this come out i'm gonna default to how do we make this work in the best way possible not pointing to all of the negative ways yeah because with the internet there's a ton of negative with the internet there's a ton of positive with ai there'll be a ton of negative and there is a ton of negative there'll also be a ton of positive so my hope is with these toys they get as much positive right as as possible and i think that's what i like about you you're an early adopter and you're not afraid of things it's like i think not i think mitigating fear can be a common theme that's like threaded throughout this episode one with the bedroom like we're not afraid to get it wrong again because we know we can correct it.

1:05:31And so I think it's cool that you're not afraid of change basically is sort of the theme here where, where I'm for a case for it is if Barbie makes learning fun for her, that's a really cool thing because learning is cool. Right. And so if it, if it is pro education, X, Y, Z, I like that, but I like what you're saying. And this has stuck with me. You said it a couple episodes ago, which was our parents were probably afraid of us being able to Google anything and get an answer or plug something into a map and then it maps you to the destination. Like that's a really foreign concept 10 years ago, but one that we found really benefits society.

1:06:10So in that regard, I hope you're right. I hope there's a lot of pros to it. And think about math. Think about how boring math is, right? Math feels like it was the most boring subject for most people in school. Now think about math through the lens of Barbie teaching it. Yeah. So imagine Barbie saying, okay, you have five bows in a package. I took two bows away to put on my head. How many bows are left in the package? Three. Yeah. Amazing. And, and, and, um, and so those are the things that I think it can bring to the table. Um, and I, I, I hope, I hope they get right. I do too. I do too. And, um, you didn't DM me anything this week.

1:06:51So no, but I did read something, a quote that I really, really liked and that is the goal of life is to be excited to go to work and excited to go home i mean amen to that excited to go to work and excited to go home fact yeah that is the goal that is truly a goal that's a goal yeah love what you do and you'll never work a day in your life yeah and that's that's what like where that just really landed for me for me is like times when i've been most professionally successful but haven't had things handled on the home front there's been a hole in my heart and vice versa where when things have been great on the home front but you know the core eight hours of your day aren't um aren't not not successful but aren't operating in which the way I would like them to or with the people that I'd like them to, that's when I've also had a hole in my heart.

1:07:54And there's actually a really interesting interview that's kind of going viral this week from Scotty Scheffler, who's the number one golfer in the world. A Texas boy, right? Doesn't he live in Austin? Nope. I think he's from Dallas. Dallas, Dallas. Yeah, Dallas, yeah. Yeah. And what he talks about is he, and P may need to help me paraphrase this, but he talks about how like the victory of winning a major, you know, that euphoria last 10, 15 seconds. and how in, you know, while he's put in an endless amount of hours towards working towards this goal, like in the grand scheme of his happiness, these massive accomplishments are actually a very, very, very small piece of it.

1:08:44And if he doesn't have things right on the home front and in his personal life, then none of that stuff actually matters. and how he would take being a great father and being a great family man over the championships every day. And I really do understand that. And it feels like his commentary really resonated with a lot of people on that front. I think one, people often say the journey is the best part, which is like a sideline point to this. But the other one is when you showed me that clip where a guy went up to somebody and was like, hey, if I had$10 million to give you, would you take it? And the guy was like, yes.

1:09:30And he's like, okay, but you're not waking up tomorrow, so you just get it for today. And he was like, oh, no, no, no, I would rather wake up tomorrow. And he's like, okay, well, then just understand that tomorrow's worth more than$10 million. And I think that that's what you're saying in terms of like, okay, so if somebody asked Scotty, would you rather win every major tournament and be the number one golfer in the world, Or would you rather just have your family be a great family man? He's like family man all day long because otherwise my heart will just hurt. But the quote I read before kind of pushes back on that a little bit, which is like there is the massive importance to like – Assuming we all need to work.

1:10:04To the – like to enjoying your holistic life. Of course. Because if you don't like what – how you're spending those eight hours a day, that's a lot of time. Right. And so how do you maximize the happiness of those eight hours? But I also think it goes a little deeper too. Like if you need to keep your job, right? And you don't love your job. Well, change your perspective on one thing at the job. So like maybe you start talking to one of your coworkers more, right? And like instead of going in just being like, oh, I hate my job. You say, all right, I'm going to talk to Nancy a lot more and just like see what's going on with Nancy.

1:10:39And then like you enhance that piece. Yeah. Yeah. This reminds me though of another quote I read. Let's get the other one. Kind of on the job and hating it. And I do want to touch on the journey. But major cheat code in life, understanding you can reinvent yourself at any time. New habits, new standards, new friend group, new career, etc. There's no rule that says you have to stay the person you've always been. You're allowed to decide I'm done being this version of me. and where that really lands is like when i i feel like there have been times in my life where i felt very boxed in especially professionally and breaking that mold at the time was one of the hardest things I'd done.

1:11:25So like jumping from a career of certainty and guaranteed money and finance to an entrepreneur and starting something from scratch where we had no idea what next week held like going from finance bro to entrepreneur like that was a full reinvention of myself professionally 95 of my professional relationships of no relevance to the new industry but that change as hard as it was and there was some fucking savage days and the emotional toll it took and the financial sacrifices that I took over a multi-year period was one of the best decisions I've made in my entire life. And it can seem like it's impossible.

1:12:31It can seem like it doesn't make sense. It's always easier to find the reason as to why not to do it than it is to do it. But when I've made those big decisions, inherently it has, it has paid off. And so I share that for people that are feeling stuck right now. Cause I felt stuck many times before. Yeah. And for them though, maybe it's even like a, like a fitness shift or a eating shift or a read a book shift, or it can be something like a relationship relationship is a big one it could be you need to break up with that person or give somebody another chance yeah i think it's all it's all relative i i really love your quotes like i love your quotes and then the journey piece okay i think you nailed and that's back to alex cost like for the naked market that's been the core focus is don't play for the ipo don't play for the sale but play for the day-to-day and that's like what I love most about the company is what our day-to-day looks like the caliber of people that are on the team what those interactions look like and the balance that everyone has to to their lives totally yeah people yeah doing triathlons and sharing what's going on with their families and when they're thinking you know moving cities and and um I think it's important to not just have your eye on like the sale, right?

1:14:02Because then every day starts to feel like a chore as opposed to saying if that happens, it happens. Yeah. But enjoying the journey is truly enjoying life. Enjoying the small wins, enjoying the big moments or small moments that you're doing to prep for the big moments. And yeah, celebrate the small wins. It's a beautiful way to end there, H. Good job. Thank you. thank you for the wisdom we can have Harry's wisdom week

1:14:37I don't think you've ever called him Harry on the pod before I've never called him Harry in general until just now I wanted to do it live to test it out to see how it felt tell the people that you love them we're going to Newport next week we're going to Phoenix then Newport then we're dropping our first second episode so be on the lookout for that ladies and gentlemen love you guys thank you for listening thanks for listening to another episode of Two Parents in a Podcast powered by Just Media House if you enjoyed the show don't forget to like, subscribe, comment, rate, and review stay connected on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Facebook at Two Parents in a Pod welcome to our home sorry it's so messy new episodes every Thursday

1:15:17I want to date with rules Carty says rules? ruck ass? this is the love story of real hinge couples written and read by me, Nicola Dinan. Listen to the free audiobook now.