How your relationship impacts your kids, our first trip away & push presents for dad?!

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0:48Two Parents:And between the posts, it's Grimace. Get one of nine collectible cups with a FIFA World Cup meal. At participating McDonald's for a limited time. While supplies last, all rights reserved. 2026 McDonald's at FIFA World Cup 2026. What's not? The mics. Oh. All right, are we on? That's okay. Are they now? Now we are. Okay, great. We weren't recording, but we're recording now. Very important. I was just watching the solid core videos. Should we talk about that? You're going to have to recap it for all of us because a lot of us don't know, but you know. Okay. And it's very funny from what I gather. Okay.

1:21So there's a man. Well, hold on. Let's start. Okay. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Okay. welcome back to another episode of two parents in a podcast hello hello who was i talking to the other day that was like who was that i was at a dinner and they're like what do you do and i was like i'm a podcaster oh so we were in new york and we went to raul's and it was we wanted harrison told me that they had french onion soup they don't it was detrimental it was a detrimental moment for me so we get there it's like an hour and a half wait so we're standing at the bar just like chilling Harrison turns around and sees this guy sitting in a four top and he's like I know him so he goes over and he's talking to him the guy's name is Harrison Harrison comes back and he's like the guys invited us to sit down while we wait on our table I would never take this invite but like my back hurts so bad I'm like we're going sitting at the table so lovely people they were awesome but she was like you're obviously pregnant what like what's the name of the podcast she's who I was talking to her name was Sam she was amazing and she was like you got to rename it to two parents and two pods and I was like that's cute look at that yeah so that I just that's who I was talking to I didn't hear that part of the conversation I could not believe we sat down with him and Harrison said guess his name and I was mad at you for doing that because he had just told me his name I had just said I'm Alex and they both said their name and you said we sit down you didn't see me introduce okay yeah I didn't see that I thought that so we sit down and Harrison's like guess his name i'm like he just told it to me and i don't know it so i was like alex and then what did i say the opposite of alex and what and what would the opposite of alex oh i we already said what his name was i wouldn't have guessed harrison i was like axel i was like i don't know what it is is it axel and then they were like it's harrison it's amazing See how the brain works?

3:20Spelling Alex backwards, my brain just immediately gets put in a pretzel. Zila. X-E-L-A, right? Yeah. Yeah. X-E-L-A. Zila. Yeah, I could not have gotten there. I could not have gotten there. So, New York, how was it? Was it fun? It was so much fun. I tried to buy Sex and the City t-shirt yesterday. They were sold out. What? Why? Why did you try to buy that for me? Because it was sick. Oh. for you. No, I'm kind of going to go like vintage cheese to the holidays. To the winter season. It's not very like jolly. Yeah, well, I feel like so I did a wardrobe clean out. I know. I saw there. You do have to when you do the wardrobe clean out, you got to take it over the finish line.

4:09You got all the boxes in the hallway. You got to go donate them. Yes. You've done the hard part, but this part That will happen. Get him in the car and then one day we'll drop him off. That will happen. Yeah, add a couple new shirts. Actually, okay, hold on. So we've got the toy drive coming. This will come out on Thursday and the toy drive is Saturday. And after this we're going to tour where the toy drive is. I'm so excited. I've been trying to find red pregnancy leggings. Apparently those don't exist because I really want to wear red with a red sweatshirt. The internet's making that impossible.

4:45so I don't know what I'm going to wear but by Thursday I'm sure I do know when this comes out but one thing that they were telling me about the toy drive and I think this is a really good idea for people is a lot of toys get donated after Christmas because when kids get new toys some things that some like an idea that parents do is they make they say okay you got three new toys from Santa you got to get rid of three toys then they go and donate those three toys but a really good idea that parents could do if that's going to be something you do is do it now so do it before christmas and say hey let's make room for santa let's get rid of the three toys now and then let's go donate them oh i like that so that's just a good little tidbit um additionally see you guys at the toy drive we're pumped santa's going to be there on a horse there's going to be live music there's going to be burgers coffee tacos a little table that we We made this like Maggie who's helping us plan it.

5:42She made this. What is that? Like an art board and the kids can color it. You can decorate muffins. So it'll be a blast. You're doing a great job planning it all. I'm very excited about it. We did it in like two weeks. So I'm thrilled. Okay. But I have a, I had a boot on my car because I went to a birthday dinner and the car. The mystery of the boot. The car got booted. Okay. So what happened was we left at 11, which who was I? we got there at seven and I looked at the phone across the table from me and I said 10 40 I was like are you on is your phone on eastern time and I looked at my phone and I was like is it 10 45 like we sat there there was 12 of us we had the best time we just like laughed the entire dinner so we go out at 11 and I was driving the neighbor it was her birthday neighbor girl and there was a boot on my car so I posted it on my close friends and two people I don't have that many people on my close friends two people on my close friends were like i also went to van horn steakhouse and parked in that lot and also got a boot but what's weird about the boot that i got was what because i sent harrison the next day i was like you got to go figure out the boot situation is the next morning i went to go handle the situation did an 8 30 workout got to the parking lot at 9 30 and the boot was gone miraculously mysteriously mysteriously gone no payment i promise i didn't pay anyone I didn't do anything I'd love to take the credit for doing it it was just gone and so I would love to know what we think happened so I sent a photo in the group text and I said I got a boot and Emma said you got to find the guy in the parking lot and pay him and he'll take the boot off so I don't know that it was like a city boot maybe it was just like a private guy doing the booting so i googled and it's legal for the private parking lots to boot you but if you contact them they've got to fix it within an hour or they get in trouble with the city but i'm not i'm still not understanding how okay magically i can i can maybe explain this did you contact them is no so maybe the guy who put the boot on like went home at midnight and because of the law of you need to take it off within an hour they were like oh we don't want to deal with lugging back here at two in the morning and so they just took it off and then we got back to the lot before they could put it back on so no i think what happens now knowing this i think he he gives up every night at midnight he says i'm gonna boot three of these cars they'll come out at 10 they'll call me they'll pay but if they don't and i go home at midnight i'm done.

8:22They get their boots removed. Okay. I mean, not what I expected, but, but makes a lot of sense. Because here's the thing. I parked in one of those, um, parking spots that has a sign above it that says reserved Monday through Friday, 9am to 6pm. So maybe he needed to have the boot off and my car moved ideally by 9am on Monday. Hmm. Yeah. Well, when you call, I was stunned because I was like, I don't think we have any outstanding parking tickets with the city. And if we do, maybe it would be one. And so it just didn't add up. But now it kind of does. It was a private parking lot. And the guys were running a little thing.

9:05I mean, it's a great idea. Boot some cars. Should we put it back and monitor it to see what happens? We should park there next Sunday night and just sit and watch just for a science project. Just to see. I can imagine you guys watching with binoculars sitting there. We'll wear the Facebook metaglasses. Yeah. Yeah, we can record. Yeah. As a busy parent, it's such a game changer to do my weekly food shopping with Hungry Root. Hungry Root shops for me and delivers groceries that fit my health goals, dietary preferences, and of course, your budget. Hungry Root helps you eat well and reach your diet or your health goals, whether you're gluten-free, dairy-free, high protein, focused on gut health or anything else, just take a quick quiz and their smart cart technology recommends groceries tailored to your taste and your needs.

9:54You guys, it's unbelievable because it just arrives right to your door and it's everything you want. And if you're gluten-free, if you're dairy-free, it fits exactly what you need. And it's such a game changer, especially when you have little kiddos running around and you don't have time to exactly figure out what you want to eat, but you can't sacrifice on mealtime. So take advantage of this exclusive offer for a limited time get 40 off your first box plus get a free item in every box for life go to hungryroot.com slash two parents and use code two parents that's hungryroot.com slash two parents code two parents to get 40 off your first box and a free item of your choice for life you know who also used the metaglasses who the guy in the solid core drama oh that's how he recorded the whole thing no way yeah that's how he recorded it yeah but you know on meta glasses if they're recording it's blinking yeah but but just in case you're wondering if you ever being recorded if they have glasses on and there's a light blinking up on their eye it's recording um but he was the only one in the class so why would it matter we need we need the explanation yeah talk talk us through this so there's there's solid core gate going on on tiktok right now a gentleman went to a 6 a.m class the teacher showed up late to the class no one else was in the class so I guess it's solid core you can enter the studio through like a passcode so he let himself in and he said he's like I'm just going to give myself a private and I love the way he said private was glorious and and he uses the Facebook metaglasses to like record the private him tuning the music um and then the teacher gets in there and and the whole thing finishes where the the the scandal occurs is i guess the teacher and group of teachers uh after that after they saw the video were trying to get him to take the video down and he wants nothing to do with it and so like a day of back and forth between them and a mutual friend of drama happens and like it just feels like major beat between him and the instructors in the studio and then he goes to solid core the next day and just like keeps doing his classes and he's like a devote solid core he just did his thousandth class wow and so while he's beefing with SolidCore the instructors he keeps going and he just keeps recording it in the glasses and this dude is hilarious no he's a great candidate to do this because what from I just watched a couple of the videos SolidCore's trying to intimidate him and make him take these videos down this this man is fearless and I saw somebody respond and be like you are not afraid of them and he was like I worked in finance with the big boys like i don't give a fuck my big take though he's like i'm not taking my videos down this is such a good marketing opportunity for solid core because he's still going he's like i like the classes and they gotta lean into it like this he loves it and he's really good at it yes and like where's him teaching like a massive solid core class like get this like but This is how you know.

13:17So I guess like I saw some instructors commenting being like, yep, this adds up. Their management is whack. And it's like this is how you know because instead of leaning into it and like being and like being proud of themselves and being like, yeah, one of our instructors didn't show up. This guy loves our classes so much that he keeps coming. And doing something with him. He's got a super strong like he's he's he's got a real personality. Like he's he's well, he's super entertaining. But he's also got people's attention right now. Yeah. So they need to ride this wave. But instead, they keep contacting him on the side, being like, take your videos down.

13:50Then he makes another video being like, so SolidCore contacted me. It's like, what are they going to learn? Like, he's not taking this. He's doing an awesome job. Yeah, I'm just trying to think of what a good idea for them could be. It's a great lesson for life, too. Like, don't take life too seriously. Like, SolidCore is in a chokehold right now. And he's just, like, going to the classes. Yeah. Everyone's talking about that more than that. like they're doing this solidays right now and i feel like they're trying to get all these influencers to post about it and people are just talking about him instead yeah it's like a 12 day solid core soliday challenge or something yeah haven't heard of that yeah this guy's so funny but i have heard of solid core gate they i think that um i think that they need to lean in and instead they're they're swimming upstream like they're going against the current yeah but i also Don't worry.

14:41It's now too late for them to lean in. They need to use him. They need to join him, not go against him. I would love to do a class with him. Yeah. He'd be great. And he knows what he's doing. He should teach him. He did a private himself. The teacher walks in. He's like, I'm doing a private. I love stuff like this. I love it. I love that he's so dedicated that he stayed. Okay, that's great. okay what's his name i forget let's talk about if we missed tate in new york so we were gone transition what it's transition oh i don't know isn't this guy in new york oh he i think he's in darianne connecticut it's like the drama of darianne connecticut yeah i think you know that he's in it no because in the last video i watched like everyone in darianne is just like in i don't know he's he's great he's great he really is great um okay so we were gone three nights away from the bubberator yeah and we decided that was a little too long we would get these photos from the neighbors from maria from harrison's mom and every night we would just sit there and we would we would go through them together because we and there was videos videos were the best she'd be like there was one where her armies were in the air she was like having a little party her at the parquet yeah she went to the parquet a lot um tady's in el parquet and she just yeah we missed her so we decided we were like Like three days, three nights is a little too long.

16:13It was the longest we'd been away from her. We'd both been away from her 24 hours, but that was it. Yeah, night three, we considered coming back a night early. Yeah, we were like, dang. And it was nice. I think you and I seriously slept 11 hours each night. And that was great because phantom cries are a real thing. Do you know what a phantom cry is? When you're sleeping and you hear a baby crying, right? There's no phantom cries when you know you're not hearing the baby cry. so we we were zonked also during the days like we had interviews then dinner like we were just what did you think of the trip though what was the highlight my highlight was um the interviews like a lot of people were dming me what did you think of emily oster she's exactly like she comes off on camera the way she writes and the way she comes off on her Instagram which is like smart real a little sarcastic and kind of dry yeah and I just like loved her and I thought her episodes we did two with her I thought her episodes were just awesome yeah she was great she was really really great she's just a weld of knowledge too just so smart she's not like and so I don't know I just I really enjoyed and I thought the Bobby founder was incredible and Dr.

17:23Lucky like we learned a ton but I did feel like my brain like was doing exercises What was your favorite part? Walking the streets with the magic. Yeah, I mean, New York just holds such a special place in in our hearts, in our memories. I just love going back there. I love it. I just love that city. Yeah. Yeah, it was great. But like, while I love New York, it does like give me this like toxic ex-girlfriend vibe where it's like, I'm there and I'm like how did I do this like how did I live in the city like and like while it was so fun the amount that that city puts you through yeah like from the size of the apartments to the cost of living to like the just like how dirty it is how loud it is it's just like it's a zoo yeah no it's a tough way of living but I think it's glorious yeah and like I love it for a very short period of time then it's like get me out of here tuck and roll yeah but hopefully not to take away hopefully there is a chapter for us in New York in the future a little maybe upper east upper west side action but I mean what when the kids have graduated that's when we talk about it a lot we're like it would be fun to go back to New York for like some part of the year once our kids have graduated yeah I'm kind of talking about both sides of my mouth here but I stand by it.

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19:29I just took them to New York. Quince has something for everyone. Soft Mongolian cashmere sweaters for$50 that look and feel like designer pieces, silk tops and skirts for dressing up. Perfectly cut denim for everyday wear and outerwear that actually keeps you warm, you guys. Find gifts so good, you'll wanna keep them with Quince. Go to quince.com slash Alex for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash Alex to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash Alex. Okay, so Bob, so here's what I learned because somebody commented on one of my videos being like, my pediatrician told me your kids don't know the difference at this age between seven minutes and seven hours if you're gone.

20:19So kids, toddlers, until about age two or three, they live in the present. And so they don't know if you've left for a second or if you've left for a couple days. All they know is I miss mom and dad and I want them. I know you don't buy it. Yeah, while the pediatrician is going to be a lot smarter than I am, and I'm sure there's supporting studies on this. Like when I look at my experience with Bubz, like I've never seen her more attached to you and I than she has been since we got back. Since we got back, she's just been so cuddly. She's been so cuddly. Like she always used to come up, run up to us, give us a hug on the leg, come sit on our lap, but would be there for no longer than like two or three seconds.

21:06And then she'd scamper back off. Yeah. Whereas like now she's coming and like she is staying and like she'll want to sit on her lap for extended periods of time. And I even feel it like when I go and if I step outside because I'm going to call and come back five minutes later versus being gone for the day, I do feel like her reactions are different. So, yeah, that just isn't necessarily what I've experienced with bubs. But I do think each morning when she wakes up and like we're gone, I don't think she knows we were gone the day before. I just think like the mist grows a little stronger, but I don't think she has a concept of how long we were gone because she doesn't have a concept of a day, but kids understand their days and where they are throughout the day by routine.

21:49But the mist grows stronger. I like that. Yeah, I think the mist, I think the heart grows stronger of missing your mom and dad, but like she knows she goes to the park and then she knows she takes a nap. So I took her to the park 30 minutes early. She took her nap 30 minutes early because we came back and she got on top of me and snuggled and started closing her eyes. And I was like, oh, you're ready for your nap. Because what I read is like their routines are how they know their days. So she knows park now. Makes a lot of sense. It's so cute when she comes on and she's tired. She's very good at the park.

22:19She loves the park. There's a bell at the park. And the moment you let her out of her bike, she runs over to the bell and she dings it. And she looks at you like, can you believe I knew that was there? So I made a video of her running up and down this hill. like learning and somebody commented it's crazy to me the things that we have to learn that we're not born with and it's like she has to practice over and over again just taking this one step because there was a terrain change yes but it's also crazy to me the things that we find entertaining because there are children oh totally if i was watching some random kid run up a hill i'd be like what yeah or like you or me walk up and down is like okay but there's a have i have i said the great jerry seinfeld quote say before we'll tell you once you say it okay so i was watching an interview with jerry seinfeld and um the interviewer asked i have said this i think say it again okay say it again you gotta say it again now all right um it's gonna directionally be the same story but um he asked him something on along the lines of how how has your life changed since you have kids or what has kids meant to your life and jay responds and says uh let me guess you don't have kids and he's like yeah i don't how did you know that he's like because anyone with kids wouldn't ask that that question and he says kids are the ultimate form of entertainment you can just watch them live their lives and it brings you immense joy um and like i think that that But what a great example of that being our reality, which is the enjoyment of watching her walk up and down a hill.

24:00And it's not even a hill. It's not even a hill. A minor slant of a park surface. But I look at the art on the fridge, Harrison, and I have seen kids' art on a thousand refrigerators in my life, and I look at that art, and I'm so proud. It is amazing how different it hits. When it's yours. I never got it. I never thought that our kids' art would end up on our fridge. Never. I was like, why? Just like, get it down. Yeah. It's incredible. Needs to be up there. Needs to be up there. Must. Not going anywhere. I'm going to frame it. When you guys were in New York, were you imagining what Tate in New York would be like?

24:41Bubber New York all the time. Harrison kept saying, we got to get Bubz up here. We got to get bubs up here. I'm saying if she lived there. If you didn't move. You said, yes. I think that I thought a lot about if we were like doing the stroller and stuff around Soho. And it would just be like, I don't even know how you get to the parquet. I don't even know if there is one. It would be a totally different way of life. Yeah, I, so probably my biggest takeaway from New York was how excited I was to get back to Austin. And like while obviously Bubz was the biggest driver of that, like the the added layers of how much I love our routine and our community here.

25:24Like all I wanted to do, like the reason why I wanted to go home a night early, because it was like, I want to wake up Friday and I want to wake up, take pubs to the coffee shop, um, walk, you know, have the neighbors come over, have them drop Winnie off, you know, have our little mid morning, um, interaction. Like I just, I missed Austin and I missed our life here so much. And so it's so weird to be so happy with where we ended up and think on how close we were to not being there and like how different life here is versus life there like that was a bit of a ramble but no but it's so nice to to love where you live to be like i can't wait to go home as opposed to i don't want to leave because i don't want to go home that's not a good feeling yeah and and but i think to go back to jules question like our life would be upside down if we were living there yeah so and also you just be like financially just like draining everything like apartments are expensive food the average cost of a meal is more yeah and just like i think like where's the community there car seats like how do you put you put the duna in the taxi schlep it all i mean i'd be exhausted yeah just to get anywhere um okay so we're gonna talk about today what are we gonna talk about today socially confident parents we're not gonna talk about toothbrushes you told me you had a toothbrush story oh from the dinner well sussies sussies okay i've been waiting so our neighbor across the street yeah she texted me she's like i put a sussy on your front porch i think i remember you're a size eight and i was like what is a sussy so i googled it oh let me i don't remember exactly what it's what it said but it says an inexpensive gift and i said i don't even know what a sussy is and she said you better figure it out soon you're gonna have two kids what is a sussy so by definition the wi-fi in this okay is a southern u.s term for a small unexpected giffer token often related to the recipient a sussy what was the sussy it was a pair of shoes like a pair of house shoes oh my i know one of Her daughter's that doesn't live at home, she accidentally shipped it to her house.

27:45She brought them across the street and I got a sussy. That's so nice. It's a southern term for a small gift, a sussy. I love it. I've never heard that term in my life. Me either. I was like, what is a sussy? I want to do more sussies. I want to do more sussies. I just think what a nice thing to do. Yeah, I love sussies. We have this neighbor that is just the pinnacle of a neighbor. Oh, yeah. She's great. Okay, so our gifts for our friends arrived, you guys. To the point, not to share too much information, but so when my mom was gone, sorry, when we were gone and my mom was taking care of Bubz at the house, we forgot to put the garbage cans out.

28:26And we forgot to tell my mom that it was garbage day. And she texted her, letting her know. I think the best story of her is that we needed a steamer one day. And she was next to a tar. I texted her. I said, hey, our steamer's broken. to do a steamer she was by a target so she bought a steamer she came over and she was like i got this and i was like oh my gosh she's like the nicest person ever yeah the whole family the whole family our block is great though so what we got everybody on our block is monogrammed um styrofoam cups with their address on them they're so cute and then we're gonna make i don't know what it's called i think it's called christmas bark the base layers club crackers christmas crack yes christmas crack And then you put like brown sugar chocolate.

29:07You crush up candy canes. I ordered some letters off Amazon that are edible. You did an amazing job with this. The cups look incredible. No, I'm so excited. Like you did it. I feel like so often when you want to do like unique holiday gifts, by the time you like decide you want to do it, the timing is too late and like nothing will arrive in time. So while I got to give you a bunch of credit for like coming up with a great gift idea, I need to give you like that the added layer of you ordered it all before like in a time so it got here in time yeah I just had had it like I kept thinking about it I was like what are we gonna do and then I was just like I want to do this diaphragm cups just press order on them and they came in they're so cute so I'm very excited um okay so what we're gonna talk about today is socially confident parents okay and not toothbrushes oh my god I keep forgetting the toothbrush story.

30:04Basically, at dinner, we were talking about who uses electric toothbrushes versus who uses regular toothbrushes. There was 12 of us at the dinner. Yep. 10 of them used electric toothbrushes and only two of us used regular toothbrushes. Yeah, I'm a regular toothbrush person. The two of us that use the regular toothbrushes also sometimes, in a pinch, will share our toothbrushes with our partner. I think it's most too. I think so too, but I don't... Well, actually, no, I think a lot of people that use electric toothbrushes probably don't share with their partner. But we don't share just to like share.

30:39We share when I feel like typically when we're traveling and one of the people forgets the toothbrush. Or if you can't find your toothbrush, you'll use mine. Also, we're always getting our colors confused because like yours is purple and mine's green, which makes no sense. That should be the reverse. Yes. And I just have a ton of toothbrushes in my drawer. so like if if we travel and we're both using it i always throw it away and i come home and i'm just like always getting a new toothbrush but what started this conversation is a very good gift idea that i do want to give to the husbands because we were wondering what was happening so we were talking about what we want for christmas and my friend taylor was like i want like nice toiletry bags i want my grown-up toiletry bags but i want one of them stocked with like mini shampoo mini toothpaste a little toothbrush a little hairspray so travel toiletry bag travel toiletry bag so instead of having to pack before all my toiletries before a trip i just take this one and i was like that's a great idea it's a great gift too great idea you guys it's december and all the hustle and bustle and what's the moment that i look forward to the most it is going in the man cave and it is slowing down cozying up with the cozy earth bubble cuddle blanket it looks so beautiful it is so soft it is so warm we posted it on the podcast insta story the other day.

31:53This thing is unbelievable. And who on your list needs to get the gift of being relaxed? You don't know what to buy for them. They have everything they need to relax. They need a beautiful throw on their couch. This cozy earth bubble cuddle blanket is unbelievable. So give the gift of everyday luxury this holiday season, head to cozy earth.com and use our code to parents for up to 40 % off. Just be sure to place your order by December 12th. We're guaranteed christmas delivery listening after the 12th don't worry our code two parents still works year round for 20 off and if you get a post-purchase survey be sure to mention you heard about cozy earth right here give the gift of comfort that lasts beyond the holidays and carries into a cozy new year also toiletry i was thinking about this today because we were ordering new pans yes and You know, I am obsessed with like pans.

32:48I remember a Bic of the Week. What? I remember a Bic of the Week. Oh, I do too. I know it. Okay. Okay. Here's the Bic of the Week. Okay. With a pan, when you are done cooking, can you immediately put the hot pan underwater and clean it? Or do you need to wait for the pan to cool? You need to wait. So that way the pan, that way the stickiness doesn't go off of it. You need to wait for the pan to cool, especially if it's a nonstick pan or you will burn it off. Yeah, you're supposed to wait for it to cool. Or like I think the like toxins can get into the universe. Thank you, Jules. And then get into your food.

33:27You have to wait. The nonstick can like peel off. Okay. All right. So I already lost this pick of the week. It's not even going to. I just find the problem with letting it cool is like you're done cooking. You want to clean. And then by the time like it cools, you've already moved on to like the next activity. You cook your meal. You move it to the next burner over that's not hot. You take off your food. You plate it. You wash a couple things. By then your pan is cooled down. But what you can't do is a direct move. Because then it's like. My family, we're direct movers. You guys are. Remember when you were at my house for the very first time and you put the pan in there and turn it on?

34:10my mom was like oh you you can't do that it causes warping cracking and damage to the coatings you know like when your pan gets warped and then it doesn't sit on the thing that's from that which is why we're looking for new pans oh really because our non-stick it's warped and our non-stick is completely gone yeah damages the coating and i said to him i said hey you're kind of doing a lot of sizzling waters and he's like this isn't a thing and i'm like this is a thing look at the pan the pan is getting significantly worse wash by wash well now you know i had no idea well you did have an idea because i told you now moving forward you know so we got yes so we got it one new pan and we're going to take it pan by pan but i was thinking wow the little things in life i want i've been vacuuming out our silverware drawer i'm just like i was thinking who am i like oh you were vacuuming out the silverware.

35:07I did a cleansing of the silverware. What does that mean? It means now every single silverware in the house matches. Well, we've got one stray bowl. Have you noticed that? Why is that white bowl back? The stray bowl, and we also have a stray fork. Why? Yes, the stray fork, the old school fork. Because it's so nice. Yeah, we're keeping that, I guess. The white bowl, I just don't know, I don't want to throw it out, because then the glass will get everywhere. but we just have this bowl sitting on the counter that we're just moving around you're right because we got new plates we got we got all new like what is it called not silverware cutlery no it's not called cutlery is it if it's a plate plates yeah we got all the plates dishware we ought to do dishes thank you we got all the dishes and we have this one stray bowl that was from the old dish set that i don't understand why it's still there but and it just resurfaced recently did you have it in the basement no where'd that bowl come from um i can actually tell you where it came from the cot so we switched to a coffee machine away from the yep um coffee pods and that held the coffee pod so it was your eggs with holding curads above the fridge and then when my mom comes she drinks the decaf so yeah we pulled the curate out and we pulled the bowl out i'm on day four of the duncan french vanilla curate pods but that's because our machine isn't working so we got to fix that no but it's nice that we have the backup because i really look forward to my one cup of coffee okay what are we talking about today we're talking about socially confident parents and how if you had socially confident parents how it rubbed off on you okay let me let me explain this a bit more further and in depth to you because i really liked what is written here so growing up with socially confident parents gives you a huge head start in life because you naturally absorb how to talk to people and carry yourself if your parents weren't that way you often reach adulthood realizing you never really learned those social skills you can absolutely build confidence later but people who grew up around it every day didn't realize they basically won the lottery and the comment on this video that I liked the most was it's like growing up with bilingual parents because they just spoke the language in the house therefore you picked up on it and you would speak that language like it's just hearing it all the time in repetition and so i think one thing that you don't often think about is socially confident parents and i'm i'm watching homeland yeah and there's the scene where the couple gets invited to this like big nice party and the kids were so excited they were like mom and dad you gotta go like this is so cool you're invited the vice president invites them to a party so they go and then the vice president's like i'm sending a car and the kids were looking out the window waiting on the car to arrive.

37:49And then mom and dad came out and they were all dressed. And the kids were so proud of their parents going to this party, you could tell. And I was thinking how things like that, being proud of your parents and them going to these social things or them achieving something at work, how that inherently would give you some confidence too. Yeah. I hadn't thought about this specific dynamic, but it does play a lot into the theme that we have in talking about, which is your kids are always watching and they're picking up your good habits and they're also picking up our bad habits. And so it's, it's so important for us to be on and be engaged and be calm and really put our, our best foot forward every day for them to, to follow in those footsteps because like they're picking up those habits, whether we're thinking about them or not, from the way we talk to the way we treat people to the way we we act.

38:48We act socially. I think the way that you treat people, like if you're out and you see somebody and you go over to them, you look at them in the eye, you say hi, then they pick up on that. Because the comment that sticks in my head that was on one of my videos is kids are more likely to do what they see you do before they'll do what that what you tell them to do totally and I think that's really big as opposed to you saying even if you don't get along with them be nice to them if they see you say hey that's a guy that you know dad had a business deal with that went sideways we're gonna go over and we're gonna always say hi and always be kind then they'll then they'll be like that's how I treat people that's what I do I think I may have said this last week but like I just can't believe how early it starts and like the biggest example in our life is like when we hug or when we dance in the kitchen how bubs will come and stand in between us and hug one of our legs or both of our legs or when we kiss each other um how she'll go in for like if she's on the floor but this is so she's just started noticing this because we were researching it yesterday and there's actually like some um science to this right so kids notice their parents interactions as early as six months okay so they start to pick up on tone and facial expressions as early as six months.

40:06Because think about it. You smile. What do they do? They smile back. We have that video of you guys on the bed. And I remember she's like three or four months old. And you're going like this to her. And she's giggling back. And I was like, wow, they just do what you do. By 15 months, toddlers can start to use parental interactions as indicator of safety. So what this means is like if we're hugging or if we're kissing or if we're dancing, they think in their mind, mom and dad are all good, right? So the way that the article, it was like psychology today. The way the article worded it was literally mom and dad are all good.

40:40And if mom and dad are all good, then my needs will get met. But if mom and dad aren't all good, then it starts to cause stress on them. The older they get, they internalize that in their minds as like, am I doing something wrong? Or if I was just better behaved, mom and dad wouldn't argue. you the importance of keeping just really relationship with your partner healthy yeah yeah I think that that's the takeaway is like your relationships it becomes bigger than just you two right it's like you're impacting these little humans around you now and not only are you impacting them but you're you're showing them if they're safe or not by your tone yeah it's super interesting okay so the other thing is that I want to explain is at two to three years what happens they notice differences in how parents treat each other yeah um they can this one's not fun but i'm sure we're gonna see it they can learn to play parents against each other which is hilarious and she's gonna be so good at that and when kids see their parents are happy they feel happy otherwise this is where they start to feel the guilt and they think like is it my behavior and then this is what's crazy too even though you're the parent sometimes the kids will say i need to take care of mom and dad and it will start to cause them stress okay so article said so so where this really lands is uh what i was thinking about sunday morning is like up early with bubs had a jam-packed saturday that went um later than i would have thought okay and waking up sunday having this all generally in the back of my mind in terms of every day with her, I need to have my best foot forward.

42:27And really it playing into like the biggest difference between my mindset, having a kid versus not having a kid was no days off. Like it is truly no days off. Because if I'm not putting my best foot forward, then it isn't just about me and it's bigger than me. and I'm holding back the baby in our house. Yeah, and I think what's like... Does that land? It does land because what I was talking with my mom group text about the other day is like we are now forever responsible. Like part of our... We will never be the same. Like once you have a kid, like you're forever responsible for that little human being who like fully relies on you but it even relies on how mom and dad talk to each other and they say there's no moments off like if Bubz is over there playing with a toy and you don't think she's listening the article is like she's picking up on it.

43:32And it's not just being there physically it's being there mentally and emotionally. Totally. Like you can't just be in the room. You need to be in the room and be on and be setting an amazing example yeah it's it's a she is paying attention but she is paying it's it's like it goes to show their sponges yeah kids mimic everything you do and so but what i thought was so interesting was even if you think your kids over there playing with a toy they were like they are picking up on your conversation so like thoughts on how i think that you and i can handle because she's at the she's literally 15 months which is where they start to pick up on it and then two to three years is where they really start to understand it more right interparent dynamics yeah so I think what couples are going to have disagreements okay I think all couples are going to have disagreements but knowing in front of her we just need to say like hey we'll talk about this in our room totally you know and like and do it in a way where