My pregnancy group chat (ft. Courtney Shields & Sami Spalter)

0:01This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required, compatibility and availability varies 18+. Becoming a mom for me I've never had such a big identity shift I feel like if I were to get a blood test right now Like everything's different Two things can be true at the same time It can be the most beautiful, amazing, wonderful Perfect thing in the world And also really hard Put that on a bumper sticker and I'm putting it on my car Totally You get to pick how you want to feed the baby It's your choice And there's no shame I don't think I could have survived without our group chat to be honest It's really been such a lifeline Should we take a breath?

0:55yeah Sammy is very Sammy of you yes big inhale right extra sip exhale what's an extra sip an extra is that a thing snort yeah it helps what's an extra sip I love it when I know the more I know sometimes I catch myself holding my breath and I think I'm too far gone yeah especially in like these settings I feel like breathe i will hold it and count and that's like the weirdest thing it's like so okay i'm just gonna say welcome welcome back to another episode of two parents in a podcast you guys today it's probably probably the most excited i've been to record no pressure you two we're gonna have fun yeah we are gonna have fun they have courtney and sammy on sammy spalter courtney suitor but courtney shields suitor that's what i decided i was gonna call there we go their instagram handle is your name i know i we've had conversations about that but it's like just it's interesting when it's my middle name nobody knows i know i never had my last name you told me that at her shower my last name is in fact suitor so here we are my jaw just dropped i know i thank you is it i was like it's shields and then it's not a normal middle name i think that's why it's a last it's a last name middle name yeah thank you of course shout out also is not only is it cool girl energy it's the smartest thing you can do when picking a handle because i remember at the shower i was like i gotta go i gotta do like a name swap online like are you gonna do a name swap she was like shields is my middle name i was like dude he's been around the block she knew you never have to change your hand it's always been shields but actually it originated because my maiden name is really hard to write and say for people typically it's lebanese and so it's kind of a niche spelling i don't think it's hard to say but it's something that people always messed up growing up so i just was like we'll go with the middle name yeah shields it is shields it is shield is cool thanks um okay so what were my eyes watering my right eye is crying you're emotional yeah i'm emotional and i'm crying and it's to be expected yesterday on the flight i said to the girl beside me because because so we got rebooked because you know so then i was in the middle seat and i was like i looked at the girl behind me i said are you profusely sweating she said i'm cold and i was like oh good and she goes i think it's and i was like the hormones yeah yeah yeah the sweats are insane they're so insane like it's 94 degrees right now at like 9 a.m it's horrible it's insane can i share something that's really gnarly please i love that i'm not a sweater typically because i have renaids i have been sweating i have started putting my primarily pear to be specific deodorant between the boobs hot take oh life-changing wow some beef tallow in between the boobs boobs no it's charcoal oh it is charcoal deodorant it is yeah i have that one too yes and that yeah it works you i'll leave it there what was the first thing you said i have what i don't know it's like a circulation problem so i usually don't sweat a lot okay i wish this is a whole new world for me but i sweat so much like the only reason i don't sweat is because i get botox in my forehead so i like won't sweat there you can get it in your armpits i heard too i might need to play with that i think that's a thing it sounds yeah painful but yeah for now the deodorant and the boobs we're gonna have a lot of hot takes on this okay what are your other wait i haven't i have so that's that was like way too personal so sorry but i have one i have like a it's not a tip but it's like something that i've done second postpartum yeah that i'm like i just haven't said out loud yet but i know everyone's doing it so i'll just share it with the class now i cannot wait um okay has anyone been getting camel toes yes i have been getting i put on like some leggings like where are we going with this and i was like okay i've never like i don't know what happened but so i ordered these like pad inserts i saw these on tiktok they're awesome okay so i actually had a business idea maybe like four years ago that we needed right hello do parents have on you can you can no but this was the idea give it to us but i was like i don't want to be selling camel toe pads for living i I don't blame you.

5:08What do you do? Oh, I sell camel toe pads, actually. Imagine instead of form if you were like camel toe. Yeah, who cares about form? We need camel toe pads. It's a different kind of form. I solved that. Correct. It could be a part of. I'm crying out. Yeah. It is like adjacent to. Form postpartum. Camel toe pads. Honestly. You have the workout here. Hayley Bieber. Launched it with Hayley Bieber. Yeah. That's my muse for my camel toe pads. But Hayley Bieber tagged you guys. She loves form. She does love form. Iconic. And I'll never get used to that. I'll never get used to that. I think that's healthy.

5:40When we're in the lab, creating, designing, she is literally who we are doing it for. That is our number one use. Yeah. She, for us at Forum, is everything. And every time we see her in Forum, we're like, damn. We did it. It's quirky. Yeah, that's amazing. But it will never feel real in that way. And the off-campus boys. I saw that yesterday. Dean. Who? I know his name's Steven, but I'll always tell him Dean. Dean was wearing a Forum hat on a flight. Who's Dean? Dean. Have you not watched Off Campus yet? Oh, Off Campus. I'm so sorry. I know Dean. I know you've watched. No, I watched. This is mom brain.

6:15I was thinking off campus. Like I'm thinking of like a campus. I was Amelia Bedelia. Oh, Off of the campus. My brain was not tracking the show Off Campus, Dean. It's the most postpartum thing you could say. Wait, that's your guy. I mean, Garrett's my guy. No, Garrett's my guy. Yeah, I'm good. And Andrew knows it, so it's fine. I'm allowed to say it. Oh, Andrew posted, what are we doing about this? Didn't you rewatch it? like I watched it three times through Dean's a blonde one I'm tracking yeah am I okay he's gonna be I didn't read the books but I should but I just don't read which is something you could talk about another time um like ever ever menus and does it yeah no I'm just not into that so Dean I think is meant to be like the face of season two though and he's walking around in a form hat and I'm telling you he has no idea what he's wearing I have heard that I think it shifts like who the primary person is yeah yeah they they casted it so well they can do that yes and i'm here for that yes like i'm everyone has that mean character energy yes um the other two are dating now too i'm gonna mess up the names i'm not good with actor names mika abdallah the girl that was with dean and then just i don't forget the bad boy band is his name in the show i forget his name the other They're together now.

7:26They're dating? Yes. Yes, I needed one of them to start dating. I know. I needed an intercast. Agreed. Is it weird, though, than when you have intimate scenes with someone else? I wonder. Great question. I mean, actors, I'm sure they have a switch that they can turn off. Because a lot of them also have wives and husbands. Couldn't be me. But also, isn't this how Ryan Gosling and Scarlett Johansson started dating? Oh, that's a hot take. I have no idea. Way back in the day. But yeah, I mean, I would believe it. You know? Some people I think have a switch. Some people I think forget to turn it off.

7:56Imagine, like, we're all happily married. Imagine, like, kissing someone else. I can't. I can't even look at a man in the eyes for too long right now. Like, it makes me uncomfortable. I totally agree. I completely agree. No. I need to tell, I need to introduce you guys. Oh, true. Thanks. Oh, sorry. Well, shut up. I'm going to move my mind. I'm so sorry. No, I don't have to. No, I'm just. Should we start over? No, we're going to keep. Start over. Are you kidding? I don't think I, I actually don't think I need to introduce you guys. So I'm sitting like a dude. you'll be you'll be cropped from here i don't think i need to introduce you guys i just want to define the voices for the people so that are listening yeah so so we'll start with sammy because we were talking about form who is the co-founder of form sammy spalter co-founder of form dog mom yes i love bagel and locks dog mom bagel and locks i feel like they're their main characters yes but now we also have sunny who's the ultimate main character yeah like sunny's our taylor swift yes who are bagel and locks in that um like i also really love dua lipa so like maybe you know what I mean okay they're like the Dua Lipa equivalents but yeah okay so like I like Dua Lipa but Sonny Sonny's now like the front runner like she's just yeah correct yeah and Andrew is your what Ang is your oh my god oh he's your Garrett Graham he's my he is my version of Garrett Graham yeah but like no weird like hockey ego he's like Ang is a really really really special human being because he has no idea how cute he is, no idea how smart and intelligent he is, no idea just how amazing he is.

9:24So, like, it is my role in this lifetime to affirm that in him. And I take it very seriously. But in return, like, he is the most pure, tender human being that will ever touch down on planet Earth. That is how we should talk about our husbands, ladies and gentlemen. I love that. I love him so much. That was beautiful. I really love him. It is my job in this lifetime to affirm that for him. Okay. I love that. Okay, really sweet. And form. Give us a form. oh my gosh we're almost five years old wow this will be five years which is crazy crazy like I feel like that kind of makes me feel old because I feel like I'm also just getting started in so many ways but we have so much fun with it we started as Sammy Clark's platform to share her workouts and I was on my own health journey I'd previously lost over 85 pounds and found Sammy Clark on YouTube and then became best friends IRL and we were like we need to do something after the pandemic when everyone needed her workouts.

10:17And then in 2023, we launched Activewear, which has been so much fun. For Haley Bieber. Yes. Who wears it? Specifically for Haley. So thank you, Haley. Specifically is wearing it. Haley, I'm sure you're listening to it now, so thank you so much. And then we launched Transform, a cute podcast. So just all the girly wellness, good, feel good, do good, love yourself type stuff. It's a whole hub. It is a hub. I've been doing the Pilates. Oh, my gosh. I mean, you are a vision for postpartum health. Truly, truly. I mean, this is, no, you look stunning and physically fit. And this is like, this is genetics at Playlist.

10:53These gentlemen, I feel like this is one of those things where people say to you, probably like, how do you look like this postpartum? And I think the answer is genetics. That's very sweet. You know, us and our back. This is all that fit. This is why I wanted to have you both on. Because I feel like our group text is, we're going to Courtney next. no one let me forget you can forget me it's okay I'll be here anyways but I feel like our group chat and I feel like both of you guys on social media are very real are also supportive of other women you're very real you're very like this is what I'm struggling with this is where I'm crushing it this is where I didn't expect things to happen and so that happens in our group text that also happens with you guys online so I wanted it to happen here too so thank you both for coming I don't think I could have survived without our group chat to be honest it's really been such a lifeline it has been and that's going to be the first thing we're going to talk about because that was the question most people asked how do i start that group text and i think what they'll be shocked to hear is like we didn't have a group text before no it was like specifically pregnancy it was a pregnancy yeah this is our birth class i hope it remains oh yeah i feel like it's popping off as part of more than anything for sure yeah i agree because we'll hit the toddler stage together oh here we go that'll be like at least you have a good memory of all this yeah this i'm trying to remember because it's not like last night i was looking on the plane and i had rocky sleeping on me i was like i can do this and i look over at tape and like that's an overtired toddler and like and the other moms on the flight though they knew it they got it yeah they were like she's gonna be this way the whole plane ride because she's too tired you can't get her to sleep and like you guys just have to get through it and i was like number one shout out to the moms for saying that yeah yeah number two like safe and seen yeah oh my flight last night i mean i had a stranger holding rocky it was amazing like the moms were out and they were i love that it was amazing she was like do you need to pump i was like this is we're going formula right here this whole flight like yeah no one's pump no one's pumping yes yeah that's amazing okay courts are scary so they are scary i already have anxiety and we're not even leaving for another four weeks i leave one week from today so i will be texting you i said to myself like But Sunny will just like Sleep I pray Ascend Yeah Angelically She will ascend angelically With a halo around her Yeah I mean honestly That's her behavior No I know There will be like A light around her That's shining Yeah And then she's gonna start Serenading all of us On the planet Correct You'll be fine It's me we're worried about No My spicy beach Georgia will sleep She's gonna sleep My spicy girl I know I know No idea where she got it Just like mama yeah just like her mama okay so courtney hi the co-founder of dibs co-founder of dibs um tell us about it give us the what do you want to know all about dibs it's on my face right now it's on my face right now too go us the bronzer yes i love the duo thank you when you posted she posted a i think was i pregnant or not it was a still frame this is what i needed i didn't need it to be in the video and you were like everything that I wear and I was like oh my gosh so I was able to get a carousel yeah it was a carousel I like that then you should because I was able to swipe through it while I shopped and I ordered it all great and it was amazing I have the mascara on thank you I love the lip liner dibs beauty ladies and gentlemen so really was born from the idea that to be totally honest not to get like emotional immediately I did not feel pretty or confident growing up for a long time at all and i got bullied a lot like i got teased in middle school i just looked different than people i grew up here everyone was blonde hair blue eyes like i it's really sad that i was the diversity because that's horrific but for quite a long time i just looked like different to some degree than other people and i had like kind of a mustache that i was bleaching that i should have been shaving thank you you weren't hearing it like me i I tried to near my legs and it burned the shit out of me.

14:51Can we cut? It smells like eggs. Yes. Okay. So, yeah, awful. So I just didn't feel confident in my own skin for a long time. And I realized the older I got, the more confident that I got that I really wanted to be able to help other women feel good. That was, like, so important to me in the community that I've built. I've been doing this for 12 years. Not dibs. We're only a few years old. But social media and creating a community for the past 12 years. And I really want to help women feel good, feel confident in their own skin. We're similar in that way, I feel, but in different verticals, right?

15:25Yes. And I just, that's so important to me because I feel like while beauty from just like a quick snapshot sounds so shallow, it made me feel good. Yeah. And I think that that's such a powerful tool, look good, feel good. And so I want to help other women feel good. And so we create products that are really easy to use, that are very versatile, that are very multifunctional. We really give you more, we like to say, because you can do so many things, right? You've got bronzer on one side, you flip it over, you have the blush. It's just easy. And we're all in a season of life where I want to look my best, feel my best, but I don't have a lot of time.

16:02So I want things that can get the job done quick, but I'm not compromising the fun of it and the look and the feel. And you nailed it. Thank you. Because when you flip it around, it's like the best thing ever. Thank you. Also, you're like OG online too. Been around for a while. But you are. Thanks. I think it's like really cool. Thank you. And so then we've watched you develop now. Now we're like, it's really fun to watch your content because now we're in postpartum land. Okay, but do you feel like this? I'm curious. Content these days is such a different beast. Like I'm used to just putting my camera up and yapping.

16:38I'm like, oh, do we have to not do that these days? like we need to be editing things like it's so different now and I feel like you feel like it's curated again yeah yeah and I used to be curated before stories like I have a vivid memory of stories not being a thing like being on Instagram and I had like just having a feed 60 ,000 followers and had stories wasn't even a feature and I remember being like wow nobody knows what my voice sounds like is that weird like oh and then getting on stories for the first time and I've been around many trips of the sun with with instagram specifically yeah and now i just feel like it's so curated again but in a different way where you have to say like the right hook and you want to get people immediately you know ready to watch the content i'm like can i just set my phone up and yap i think a lot of people are like so focused on virality too i don't know if y 'all feel that but i almost feel like stories are my safe place same community community yes i feel like stories are where I can actually be myself and then if I'm posting something in feed I'm like shit like is this aesthetic or like I need to speak better about that on the brain because I'm like it is not aesthetic my newborn smiling god forbid my newborn is like I just think that yeah there's a lot of noise online but I think you both give me such permission to be myself and I think you both are so authentic like for everyone listening I want you to know that Courtney and Alex are both exactly who they are online in person and that's rare that's really rare thank you well the I was gonna say the other thing I think is rare is to be so I one thing I don't know that you that the listener will know it's like I will watch your guys's story or vice versa and then we will take it to the group chat right yes like like the flight last night yes like it's like real thing or like if you know we were watching Georgia right and you were talking about how like okay we're struggling with the journey yeah yeah and then we'll take it to the group chat because it's that real.

18:30The stories are... It's true. It really is what we're going through. It is in real time. Yeah, totally. We're not like, just slept 12 hours and it was a perfect day. Oh my God, I'm dying in the group chat. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Which is, it's refreshing because then it kind of completes the wheel. Totally. So let's talk about the group chat. There's this moment every parent knows. You've handled the meltdowns, the homework, the bedtime battles, and then you finally sit down and realize you haven't been okay for a while. And when you finally decide you need support, finding a therapist feels like another job on your already full plate.

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19:52Visit Rula.com slash two parents to get started. That's R-U-L-A.com slash two parents. We need to hear about Courtney's family. Courtney, Austin, the family. Yes. Thank you. He's the best. My husband is amazing. He's the best dad. He's the best stepdad. He's like truly, I started crying the other day when I was looking at him because I was sitting there looking at him and he is the most, I don't know how to explain this, but he is so unfiltered. And I think that sometimes in the beginning especially like that came off as shocking in a way where you're like that was like just so raw okay sometimes you're like did he just say that like thought because he just says things but he is the most just honest like grounded calming force for me and he in so many ways has gotten me to be the most grounded version of myself yeah I feel like there's been so many I mean, our careers are crazy.

20:50Like you do this and it's really easy to like be up your own ass. And I feel like there's been so many times when he's like, all right, like, come on. And I feel like he's like humbled me in the best way. I don't know how else to say that, but he's been like a really amazing grounding force for me to really prioritize and focus on the right things. Sounds like a good person to have a kid with. Like whenever all of us hang out with the boys, all of us are the guy who is saying exactly what everyone's thinking. He says inside thoughts. That's why sometimes you're like, did you just say that? But I really respect that.

21:23As a people pleaser, I witnessed that and I'm like, I need more of that. And I trust him implicitly because you will always know where you stand. It's the truth. Yes. And sometimes you're like, ouch? But it's like, you needed to hear it. You're better for it. Like he's just really real. Do you remember when you described him to me as a black cat? Yes. I've never unseen that. Yes. He is. You see Austin and you're like, okay, meow. It's like, no, it's so funny because I feel like people are always like, you need the dynamic where like you marry a golden retriever and just such a golden retriever.

21:50You're the black cat. And I'm like, I fear we're both black cats. Just like black standoff. It really works. We're very similar in a lot of ways and then very different in our own ways too. But he doesn't feel the need to fill silence is what I've noticed with him. Yes. And he very much, so like I asked him, I was like, okay, at Swade's birthday party because we all went to the same birthday party and I was like how's it going and he was like it's amazing but it's also hard sometimes yeah because her stomach hurts yeah and I was like Georgia's not mine to be clear my stomach does hurt sometimes he was holding their daughter at the time yeah sorry that isn't very important yeah so there's Courtney has a bellyache hot girls have tummy props tummy problems so he was saying I said how's it going be how's it going with Georgia and he's like it's obviously amazing but like sometimes it's also hard because we're watching her stomach hurt and that's a really hard thing and i thought not something a dad usually says yeah so he's just like he he is a um strong solid like we also need to talk about harrison pop off the listeners like no you don't i love harrison no me too obviously no i but i really love you too he's very real as well much fun as a dad austin loves harrison he came back from when they hung out and he was like he's this guy's great he's such a homie i'm i'm very obsessed with him i i i said it to him last night after you know like you have just like a crazy travel day and i just looked at him and i was like i'm so glad i picked you yes you know like i love that when you're delayed with a toddler and a newborn you're like thank goodness yes he's carrying all the bags he's also laughing right take somebody special he's like we can take he he looked at me when we so we went to the we he hired this guy who he who drove him from dallas to austin when he was delayed recently and so we got the same guy he sent us a photo of the car seat he's like yes the car seat works you know we go outside and he's like here and I love that he's the one that notices he's like that's a forward-facing car seat Tate has to be backwards he's present yes he's present and he's like that's not safe like we could we could put her in it we're not putting her in it we're getting on the flight she's gonna be a mess on the flight I'm holding her you take Rocky like we can do this and I just love that thank you the priorities too and what it's like all those memes where it's like I didn't marry a loser.

24:02That's like one thing that I think is another through line for us is we all have really good, strong, present guys. Also dads now. And they like each other, which is cool. It's great. All right, that's a plus. That's convenient. Girls will force them. Yeah. Or we will make them. We will make them. They're funny together too. Yeah. They are because they're all three so different. You said something in your reel last night. Talk about bringing the Instagram to the group chat, but we're going to bring it to the podcast today. You said it's you and I to Harrison versus the problem, not you versus me.

24:31Yes. And that is something Ange and I say all the time, because I think as being, you know, we're first time parents. There's so much newness. I feel like we are having a heart to heart every day right now. Like there is at least one, if not 12 things happening in any given day that needs a big conversation. Totally. And yeah, like that mindset in itself is a game changer. And the constant dynamics that change not only from relationships to work and everything like you're. I mean, both of you guys are badasses. So you're badasses at work. And then when you come back, when you come home, right?

25:07It's like, okay, soften. It's a different energy. It is a different energy. You have like a very particular way of being like the boss, but also you exude like a soft energy. And I need to capture a little bit of that because I think that's really hard to do. I think I'm a feeler and I think you can be both, you know, a founder of a business and have expectations of your team and then also love the people that you get to work with and ask them how they're actually doing and check in on their relationship and have a real relationship. And I feel like I've also kind of brought that same energy home.

25:50Like, I do feel like I'm very similar in work that I am at home. And what do you mean at home? Like, with Ange. Like, with our dynamic, I'm not just, like, I have my opinions. And, like, we both lead within the household. Yeah, I can tell that. I can tell that you both lead. Yeah. Okay, that's kind of, like, something that we can talk. That's interesting. Yeah, where do we want to type this? That's not on my list. But I think that that would be how have the roles settled for both? because you're okay okay you're both very alpha right like we have two business owners which is cool um I actually think it's like three three business owners but I'm the one interviewing you so within your household because the listener probably knows how Harrison and I divide and conquer maybe but you two when having you know newborns how have you divided and conquered because you we now that we've also learned like you've got really great spouses too yeah yeah so it's interesting I feel like Ange and I have figured out this thing where we know each other's energy so well that we can witness when one of us is kind of like at the tipping point yep and and like don't really allow the other person to get maxed out so i feel like there's this unspoken conversation happening constantly where we both kind of do it all together like it's not a complete divide and conquer because i would also say like we're 10 weeks into learning a whole new life like this has been the craziest learning curve of my entire I have no fucking clue.

27:19I never changed a diaper before my baby was in my house. Like it's, it's crazy. And you like run a big bit. That's why I like the parallel though. Like we, like you guys run shit. Okay. And like you are. And we communicate. So that's a good point. So like today I said, I have to be on a podcast. I get to be on a podcast at 9 45. Wow. What a reframe. Oh, this is such a good time. I can literally feel the booze. Yeah. If I start leaking, if I start leaking, I'm not let down by you guys, but I'm having a, I know. Why is let down like a sad? I know. We need to remain let down. I agree. Like I'm sad about that.

27:53Yeah. That means she's hungry. Pump up. Pump it up baby. No, well we're doing formula now so this is just I'm saving. But it actually means, sorry I didn't know I mean to interrupt you I started feeling it and I was like what's happening? If your boob is leaking interrupts. I hope not. Yeah. Okay keep going. So you, so you, hold on let me just say this back to you really quick to make sure I'm understanding. You're saying like, you don't have somebody that always makes the bottles. You both do it all. Right. Okay. We both do it all. And, and today, you know, I, today's actually one of my first days where I'm kind of back on for forum stuff.

28:26Cause I did take a maternity leave and I absolutely honored it. And so, you know, I had to leave the house at nine 30 to get to do this podcast. And then I'll leave here around 11 and I'll have about 20 minutes at home before I need to hop on to a big forum call. We're doing our whole Q1 for 2027. That is a big one. It's a really big one. It's 1130 to 230 today. It's a big one. So that's a conversation that Ange and I had Sunday night looking forward towards Wednesday of saying, okay, like this is what I'm going to need support wise. And I think something that we've really honed in on is over communicating even before we had a baby.

29:03And now that we have Sonny, it's like, he knows if I pooped. He knows exactly where I'm at in my day. And I think that's where we're finding success right now. But I'm not going to sit here and say that we haven't run into really hard conversations where, again, we were having big sit-downs every day. We were on the same team. It's us against the problem, as you said in your reel, which I just absolutely love. But yeah, it's a lot of learning for everyone right now. So you guys are doing the – you both know how to do it all. Yes. So one of you can leave and the other one can hold down. The one that I struggle with, which I do want to put out there.

29:39Okay. The duna is the most convenient thing. Yep. But damn, putting that thing in and out of the car. I can't get it out of the car. So I can't say that it's convenient because I can't use it. It's stuck. Can someone give me another tutorial? I texted that in the group. I was like, the duna is stuck in the car. They brought the stroller in. I have to take the 10 deep breaths. I just wore her because I was like, this bitch is stuck. I can't get it out. It's stuck in here. So the whole like getting in the car, getting out of the car. Yeah. That is one where I'm like, Daddy, Angie, get that. You can get Sonny right now.

30:09That's one where I'm not even going to really try. But at home, you can both run point. Absolutely. Okay. And then you do a baton pass. But we tap it in. Yeah. I want your answer, too. We do the same. We can both run point. We do pass the baton. We have areas where, like, right now, Harrison's probably manning Tate and I'm probably manning Rocky, which is interesting. we've kind of divided it that way yeah that's because of the feeding yes 100 because of the there is a level of newborns that need their mom for like specific things especially if you're nursing or anything yeah so the milky is a big one for us right now but we can both we do the same thing we notice one tank start and then we'll tap in we'll be like i'll take the head right now and i'll leave yeah so we do the same yeah what about you guys similar for us i would say we have different strengths sometimes but I think too George is a sensitive girly and so she's needed a lot of like regulation co-regulation so she really loves to be on one of us but same thing when you're kind of touched out or tapped out because she's had colic we've had a lot of stuff going on there's only so long you can listen to the screaming before like you're also in tears and that has happened to me a couple times when I'm like I'm he's on a meeting or he's doing something because he's crushing it right now with work and he's so he's outside he's on a meeting he takes a lot of meetings outside our house or not outside of our house but like on our back porch area okay so it's really nice and peaceful out there and he'll look in the window and i'm like sobbing he's like all right i gotta go like and he'll come in and take over so we do the same thing where we really like tag in and tag out for each other but there's certain things where she like has to poop i feel like he's really good at tagging in on the maneuvers you know I feel like dads do love the poopy diaper.

31:52Yes. No, like getting her to poop like on like. Oh. Like her little legs like to push up against him. And then if she's overtired, I'm like, let me put her in the carrier. She does well with me like that. You're good at wearing her. He's good at the parrot situation. He's so tall. She likes to see what's going on. Just pop her over the shoulder. She likes that. So we have different strengths or different ways we go about tending to her in a lot of ways I feel like but we do tag in and tag out for each other I can't I can't baby wear I don't know it's I don't know it's complicated I have the hardest time like like I can get the dude in and out of the car I cannot I cannot get a carrier on the right way like that's like it's not as intuitive as it should be it's not as intuitive especially when our babies are this small right now I think it's a lot more challenging and I'm all here for like moms helping each other online but I do feel like that was my first dose of oh my gosh the first picture I posted with Sunny in a carrier.

32:51I was like, I can't even. Her leg's not right. That's not, no, it's the face. That's not how you do it. She's going to suffer. I'm like, I'm literally staring at her. I promise she's okay. You can't kiss her forehead or something. Yeah, that one. But like, I got so much carrier feedback. I'm like, okay. Yeah, feedback. That's so Sammy. I'd be like, I got shit on. The feedback loop was firing. He's like, I got feedback. It was not possible. Instagram put me in timeout. It is hot. That happened to Harrison, though, with Tate and the carrier, too. the learning curve guys it's the whatever like but i think a lot of it is well intended in the sense that heaven forbid something ever happens like you want to be like hey just so you know but you can tell the difference and when someone's giving you well-intended feedback versus not you know what i love yes when someone's saying i love you and i've been in your shoes and i wish i knew yes that maybe her forehead should be a little bit more visible yes completely i know you're learning like instructive feedback to at least sit in the fact that we all know that I'm learning

33:52when people come in the con when the DMS and they're and they're so mean I'm like I'm not listening to that I will just instantly block you like straight up if you are gonna come and it's mean-spirited you're done this is a community but it's still my platform and if you are gonna to come on and shit on me or or someone I love like you're out period see that's what I mean I don't play I don't play but you wouldn't talk like I wouldn't text you guys like that either right so why would anybody listen yeah I actually had this is interesting I'm gonna say this so I had a dm get it and he's like do it I'm like I'm ready go so I got a dm that started with I don't want to be mean but it's always mean and it was something about the fact that I was wearing sweatpants but I'm trying to be body positive and I don't get that so the fact that I'm saying like like it's okay to look like you just had a baby when you're like not showing your body off and and I'm wearing sweatpants okay okay one I'm comfortable too I'm also even get it like giving myself full permission like she's like hiding her body even though she's saying it's okay like I think she's saying like it's so hot outside you should be in shorts if you're body positive and i i'm really positive that you should not be giving me this yeah correct like honestly i am positive that's probably what i should have said however i took her down my ted talk of if you're gonna say i don't want to be mean but you probably just shouldn't say anything at all like i'm pretty sure i learned that when i was five years old and learned to speak and i just think you know as moms and like even in our group chat we come together to all walk the same parallel path right like none of our journeys are ever going to be the exact same like we've all had different struggles but we're all in parallel path and i welcome that on the internet i think there is such a beautiful community for sure that happens in a digital way but if you're saying i don't want to be mean but like probably just don't say anything here's the thing though because it is mean it's we didn't even know what she was referring to when you said that like it took us a minute to be like what and it's me because no it's because we would never think that yeah so my point is that's you also just know that i only wear sweat but that's her own projection that has nothing to do with you or what you're wearing or what you're promoting that is she's feeling some type of way about herself and she's putting that on you because i um why why wouldn't you be able to wear sweatpants like i don't even get that at first it took me a minute yeah it's because i would never think that you can of course be both body positive and wearing sweatpants i think that's an important thing to talk about too which is two things can be true at the same time yes why about birth yes i feel and about everything right like it can be the most beautiful amazing wonderful perfect thing in the world and also really hard yes you can be elated with joy and also really tired you can be really proud of your body for what it's done and also excited to feel like yourself again like it's okay to be two things at one time and often that actually is how most people feel.

36:59We do live in a society where it's really one or the other. It's you either need to fully embrace how you are, how you look, who you like, all the things, or you need to look perfect and want that. It's like, well, why can't I be proud of this and also looking forward to not? Yes. Fitting to like actually fitting into my clothes. Put that on a bumper sticker and I'm putting it on my car. Seriously. Totally. Real talk. You know what's actually attractive? A dad who knows the nap schedule. Hot dads use NANIT and I stand by that you guys. Dads today they're different. We call them the millennial parent.

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38:07And Wirecutter just named it Best Wi-Fi Video Monitor of 2026. And if you're expecting this is the number one item you're going to want on your baby registry but if you need it now don't wait nana has two big sales happening this month so head to nana.com that's n-a-n-i-t.com it's no it's it needs to be said and i i just recorded my birth story yesterday so it feels fresh and like i um that's basically all i talked about for an hour was my birth with sunny was absolutely the best day of my life but just saying that would not honor the fact that it was also absolutely the hardest fucking day of my life yes ever correct ever and and why do you need to just say that right because i think though that there's this perception that i'm complaining if i say this was really hard it's that i'm not grateful or that i'm complaining and that's just dead ass wrong like yeah i can be you can be you can be both so grateful and it can still be really hard like that's normal that to me is motherhood yeah i was gonna say life Like why do we have to box it into one?

39:10Totally. Why do we have to simplify it so much where we feel one emotion and that's it? That's not real. I think that's why, and I don't know if, did either of you feel like you had postpartum depression? Oh yeah, girl. Like the blues. Yeah. So, waves. Correct, ups and downs. Like the whole lights thing, when she had jaundice, I was a disaster. Like so much so that Austin had to come next to me he was like comforting he was like it's okay and I was like it's not okay like I was right so out of character like just devastated yeah and now I'm like it was fine but like that that's such a good point though Courtney of like Courtney's in the hospital Georgia has jaundice and you're freaking out rightfully so I was on cloud nine in the hospital I felt like I was in the four seasons hotel room I didn't even know where the hell I was on the ceiling I'm on like painkillers for my c-section i didn't even care i was just cut open like i was truly the happiest version myself y 'all i get home we had our whole family in town i get home the whole family leaves to go to their hotels and airbnbs and i'm sitting on the couch holding sunny and i look at andrew and i said what happened to me oh like what makes me sad like literally what did i just go through Yeah, you were like in shock almost.

40:31Yes. Probably. And I think there was like a lot of almost like a survival instinct that happened. Adrenaline. And also just like the celebration of seeing Sunny, meeting Sunny, being with Sunny. And then once I got home, I started to actually process. And I'll never forget day five postpartum. I don't think there was five seconds of that day that I wasn't crying. Oh. And it was over nothing. But it was truly like I will say. And it feels like everything. though it was the lowest of my life like I have never seen that version of myself and and I am absolutely a very positive person you are and I think for anyone who follows me maybe like like that's only the point of view I can give sometimes but like that is like who I was put on this earth to be like I I do just kind of like find the sunshine yes um and and I really like identify with that so to have felt the postpartum depression come on so heavy so quick it just felt like I was like watching a movie of someone else's life like I didn't feel like myself so I kind of try to go around it instead of going through it and like actually honoring it and giving myself permission to really feel I would actually argue that that's going to make you so much better even and better at what you do and and have a deeper ability to connect with people because you have now felt that too yeah I think sometimes because I'm the same way where I'm a big like silver lining person and I think sometimes when everything is like that it's like well I can I can always find the silver lining I can always figure it out but it's like until you feel and I know that you obviously have felt things like this your mom and other things it's like when you really feel deeply sad and devastated by things you can show up and you can say this is how I see the the sunshine this is how I got through this this is how you're you're choosing to be positive not because nothing's ever happened to you but because things have happened to you because it is a choice right absolutely and I think that's such a different perspective rather than like what it all everything's good absolutely it's like this is a choice I am choosing to actually feel it and to feel the joy and to choose that, to make that is an active daily choice.

42:44Yeah. I've realized now that I'm in therapy because I love my new, I hired a new therapist postpartum. I've been watching this. And I love her. She's also like super into astrology. So she's like telling me like why my moon is in like this house. And I'm like, I have no idea what that fucking means, but thank you. And I love her. And yeah, my new saying with my therapist is I need to feel to heal because it's so easy to kind of like beat around the bush and just say and yeah I think for me like there's so many reasons to be so happy to be so grateful to be so overjoyed but I can't ignore the fact that I am really fucking anxious and depressed off the time and you don't need to ignore it no yeah but that's the two but that's the the duality of it all at the same time which I think is motherhood it's why I asked like has did anybody have the depression because I think a lot of people struggle saying I have postpartum depression because they're afraid it's going to cancel out the over joy that they feel at the same time.

43:42You should only be so happy. And it also feels only be one. It's like, we're all both. It also feels like, what does that mean? Like, is it for an extended period of time? Is it like colic where it's like, I'm crying three hours a day? Like what, what, what is the, I don't know. Well, it's like the two things of being true at once of yes, we are so grateful that we have these perfect healthy babies, but we're also like becoming a mom to a second child becoming a mom to a first child like I feel like I was reborn in my own way in the last 10 weeks sure and and I think that's also something in hindsight like now knowing what I've been through and understanding how I'm feeling right now Courtney to your point I feel like I can relate so much more deeply to everyone who's been in this situation.