Friday Club | Freaky Friday

32:37see I don't think I don't think it's hurry as well I'm going on I'm going on like if she's a if she's a big piece of kit I'm reckoning pen and ink a bit couldn't it and obviously I'm only joking but like you don't like there's you don't fancy her not in the slightest artist like if she'd approach you you'd never in a million years approach her and if she come out just asking you chatting you probably avoid it but just because she's got a fanny out have a feel of this big stuff yeah why not man of the people aren't you Chris man of the people so what so would you would you ever would you not entertain that no it's not for me she's a pretty irrelevant to me.

33:25Just for curiosity's sake, I'd say. Just to see if it felt same. Ah, right, so it's more field work. Yeah, just to see what it's like. Yeah, well, maybe you're doing a service for mankind. What about if it were a woman and she'd had an Obmed? A what? A woman and she'd had an Obmed. She'd had a fella. Does that exist? Would I touch it? Yeah. No. Just have a feel? If I'm not going to touch a new Fanny, I'm not going to touch a new Onewood. I kind of know what you mean just out of curiosity not for us not as a sexual experience it's more the marvels of science and medicine these days oh look what they can do yeah maybe then

34:15evening chaps please keep me anonymous as my new missus listens to the pod and doesn't know this story yet. Love the show, blah, blah, blah. So, I was newly single and decided, pissed up one night, to sign up to all the apps. After a few days, I matched with a lovely looking woman from Liverpool. I'd describe her as a chavvy eight. Everything was fake, goes out in rollers in her hair, etc, etc. You know the type. You know the type? You got a picture? painted a picture anyway chatted for a few weeks and a few pictures were sent from her to me Champions League wizard sleeve put in brackets see I've got like a Katie Price type look yeah yeah before she's had like the last fucking 43 surgeries mmhmm you see I miss this world of apps and stuff I just wonder how how many interactions before and who makes the first move of sending a picture of the fanny Do you have to send a willy first?

35:19What's the etiquette? I've never... Do you have to ask? I've never sent photos. Ooh. Oh, you definitely... Imagine that. I've never got quite the right angle. I've not always been this fat, Chris. From below, you know, pressing the take with your big toe. But like, you know that picture of Ricky Gervais in the bath? Just him. I suggested I drive and meet her as it was only an hour away from me. So he's about an hour from Liverpool. She agreed, so I said I'll pick her up about 7.30 on Friday and we'll get some food, maybe a drink, and then I'll take you back home. So he's indicating exactly what he intends.

36:04So an hour, you're probably looking at, what, 50-mile radius there? Yeah, he's gone big, hasn't he? Yeah, he's catching a big old net. She said she couldn't that night, and every time I suggested a night, she turned me down. Strange, I thought, as she daily sent me pics of her playing with her cello, moaning my name. So she's doing custom. He knows that it's not just the standard video that she sends out. They're the best ones, them, Chris. Yeah, she's getting his name involved. What's the app that I used to be on that used to send messages and that? Oh, Cameo. Cameo, it's like porn Cameo. But I like that she's putting his name in.

36:40It's like a hostage situation. You know when they have to hold up a copy of today's paper Prove they're alive. Yeah, this is just for you. So I sent her a message basically saying, if we aren't going to meet, then it's fine. I just need to know. The response was nothing I expected. She replied with, I really want to see you. I just can't leave my house after eight as I am on a legally mandated curfew. She's got tag on. She's done well not to show it. You're on the videos. Yeah, she's gone. down up like Ricky Gervais' mouth, like you said. Red flag. But as I thought about it more, I got another video of her rogering her shitbox like she was trying to get the dildo inside her bowel.

37:32And thinking with my penis, I downgraded it to an amber flag. Do you know how you look like bum stuff? Do you know if you get a video and she's chucking a dildo up her arse, what's that wouldn't do a lot for us but are you like oh I'm not bothered now no no no no no it wouldn't be like a mick as people call it so if she said look I'd like to have sex with you but I really want you to chuck it up my bum what are you doing hmm burning man you tickle a 50 year old woman's fanny just because it's there just in a bar just because she asks erm no not for me no so you're saying no I'm not gonna she really wants you I don't care John she can want we spoke for a couple more days and agreed a time and date that worked I'd already informed I wasn't looking for anything serious but she was adamant I would change my mind for her so she's confident I wouldn't he's putting brackets eventually she gave me her name to add on Facebook and I thought I'd use that chance to see if what she had done was bad enough to be in the paper, as when I asked, she said, oh, it was just something silly in the heat of the moment.

38:50When I say my ass fell out once I typed her name in would be the biggest understatement of my life. What could she have done? The headline read, Woman tries to castrate ex. She had found out her ex was cheating on her and basically tried to cut off his cock in his sleep so he couldn't do it again. I quickly saved all the videos to my camera roll and deleted her on every form of social media. I lived in fear for days that she would find me. So far she hasn't, and my pitching wedgie is still going strong. Keep up the good work. P.S. I have a story about one of the weirdest kinks you'll have ever seen.

39:33If you want the story, let me know. We like them, don't we? We like the weird kinks. so yeah she tried chopping her old fella's old fella off everyone's got her past Chris

39:49are you saying that she can't meet somebody and be normal in the future what you think she's been rehabilitated yeah she's got that in her locker she's obviously a fiery one isn't she imagine you know her past but it's going alright and you're thinking I'm just trying to google it and then she's out at garden with garden shears every time you see her oh she's cutting a bit of chicken get bread knife out yeah you know like you could you that is one of them in it where you said i'm going to be in eight o 'clock and it's 10 to something was you want another pint no do i i'm going home mate don't worry about that there's a one i hear and it got sent from the um you know that contract contact form on our website they get lost don't they so we'll put the email out have you done a deep now I've reached this is from May 24 this that must be when we just started was it yeah there must be some bloody good emails I mean they're all still there I know I was speaking to somebody the other day who said he sent one through the contact form and I couldn't find it there's all them Romanian emails that we get asking us to go to a brothel in Sheffield English lad living the dream out in Australia and loving the podcast to set the scene I was on a stag do in Munich for Oktoberfest which by the way is hands down the best stag week ever the stag in question was my ex-girlfriend's brother-in-law i.e.

41:19her sister was to be married to him yeah I think I've got it her ex say that again Chris his ex-girlfriend's brother-in-law So his ex-girlfriend, her sister is marrying him. Yeah. I hadn't been with the girl very long and was unsure if I wanted to get too serious, but the brother-in-law and I had got on really well at a family function. He saw me as quite a sensible fella, and as the lads were a lot older than me, and married, he said the boys would get on well with me. Or how was I about to prove them wrong? We got settled in after the quick hop over, and I had sunk eight pints before touchdown in Munich, and I was well on me way.

41:59We got our bags dropped and headed right to the festival location. Fast forward after a shit ton of Germany's finest beer, we had left the festival and went to one of the many after parties going on around the place. We bumped into an American contingent who were all a similar age to me and as the older lads had got boring and I was getting lively, I drifted into the American company. Another couple of hours later, I can only imagine the boys got tired and said, Fuck the young fella He's annoying We're off to bed Leave him be We're only round the corner From the hotel He'll get back alright Again You've done well You know considering He's done eight pints And then probably another six Before they've arrived I know Mm-hmm That's I'm not lasting as long as he Might not even make it out Again How wrong I was to prove them God knows how But in my poor state One of the American college girls Took a fancy to what she called My James Bond aura Oh, he must have a Romanian accent.

42:59I'm from... That's my schmoney penny. I'm from Bristol, and I look fuck all like Daniel Craig. Long story short, she said, let's go back to my hostel. Oh, yes. Yes, indeed. I'm a schmoney penny. We go hostel. We go hostel. That was our job, wasn't it? Without a second thought for thy... without a second thought for my then girlfriend and the fact that I was away with what was effectively her family. Got ourselves a twister. Do you know what we need? We need a twister sound. Yeah. Forgot to mention her stepdad is with us. Oh, God. You are fucking proving him wrong. We get back to her hostel and it transpires she doesn't have a private room, but there is in fact six other people in there.

43:53we hop up on the top bunk and get our kit off anywhere top bunk some don't need it potentially she then says have you got a condom to which I say no well she says I'm not doing it without a condom I mean yeah respect to her so bollock naked I jump off the top bunk and start asking around for a Johnny I would say that's a good place to find one excuse me mate you got a Johnny just put that up with the shoulder just tap it have you got a Johnny what's the hand gesture for a condom I was just going to say that there's a multitude of nationalities in that room as well I think I'd panic and just do a he's naked he's naked in here have you got a Johnny what else well he's naked in here so he can point to his penis the point and then like do a court gesture a sheesh

44:46right someone hands one over how do you go with that one I'm like actual gesture and as a... maybe pretend you're unwrapping, pretend you're holding the top and rolling it down. That's that one. Yeah, that's a good one. Someone hands one over and I'm back on my merry way. Can you imagine? You're half asleep. You owe me one. Just rub it in your bag. Fuck off. Have you got any other flavours? Running into the toothpaste and the toothbrushes, deodorant. the deed gets done and we knock off to sleep i then wake up around five o 'clock and immediately i knew i was in a spot of bother don't be awkward if you got if you give you an extra large yeah

45:43the large amounts of beer had made their way to make havoc with my bowels and i had a i had very little time to make it to the toilet to rip a shit. Oh god. Ripper shit. Chaos. Ripper shit. I stumble out of the room in just my boxes still very drunk looking for a toilet. To my surprise there are no toilets close and everything is in German. Yeah. I'm looking through the hotel in a panic now and I open a door that leads into a laundry room. Oh no. With the options of shitting myself or finding a suitable location I decided to empty a laundry basket full of bedding onto the floor to take the foulest shit I've ever done using the bedding to wipe my bum and throwing it all back on top of the shit to cover my tracks what are you doing man but to be fair what else can he do the audacity of him though do you know if he shits himself he's still going to use the laundry to wipe up in it but he's just come back to bed anyway there's a bathroom somewhere I know if you if you've never experienced it when your stomach's gone and you can't and you're at the point of no return.

46:49It's a horrible, horrible place. They've not had sex at this point, have they? Yeah. Sorry, I missed that bit. Sorry, I missed that bit. But he's just got about, he's dropped the shit. I thought he was still running around just with a condom in his hand. No, mate. Just putting it on top a bit drier. I then woke up at two o 'clock. No phone battery. In the afternoon. Yep. And the female gone. And the strangest smell of shit in the air. I discover that I've done a very bad job of wiping, so I use pants to clean myself and leave the hostel commando. It is then that I realise I'm in the middle of Munich without a clue where I am and in a sorry state.

47:27I decide to go to a police station and hand myself in as lost. I don't know if that's a joke or what. I don't know if he's being serious. I want to report to this in person. Have you got the name? Me. Could you please describe him? Just fucking look at us, biggin. Is he being serious, are you? I think that's a good shout, me.

47:58I'm lost. What do you do if you're lost in a city you've no idea where you are? No phone, right? The phone battery is the only place to go. Luckily, there is a copper who can speak English and he takes me back to the hostel I was staying where I find a note from the stepdad saying we know what you got up to last night don't be back here when we get back I grab my things get to the airport and call it an early finish on the stag and I decide it's also time to call it a day with the girlfriend he's gone through everything there that is Disneyland rollercoaster that great podcast guys sorry it was a long one it felt good to get it off my chest he says see do you know do you know what he could have done obviously if the policeman speaks English just say look can you write me a ticket so I got arrested I've been in slammer all night yeah what's up you like comes in you fucking dirty bastard I've been arrested we're in in the street or something yeah I wonder if they knew though how could they possibly know what exactly what he'd done or do you reckon he was he having a bit of a kiss and a cuddle with her beforehand and then left.

49:12Well, they've just assumed. I've said it many times, I'm no Hercule Poirot, but if they've left him on his own with a group of Americans and some of them are women, and he's still not back at two o 'clock next day, there's a good chance he's been up to no good, haven't they? Do you think the stepdad's out of order for doing it there, for saying that there and then? I think I would. Yeah. Would you? Yeah, I think I would. Would you not want to, you'd just be like, get out of my sight. Yeah. I don't want to say you're again. You think, just imagine it's your daughter. I mean, I know it's his stepdad, but imagine if they were your daughter's boyfriend and you found out you were messing around.

49:50The best thing is he thought he was a sensible lad. Bring him along, he'll be... Yeah. So he did prove them wrong, didn't he? He'll not let us down. So do you think that's a bit of genius then, reporting himself as missing? I mean, it would seem so. He got him back. Yeah. I would never have thought of doing that. Or do you start printing out missing posters of yourself? You know, with them little tabs up bottom with the number. Reward! Just wait for one of your mates to see it. I'll tell you what your thing is, for him, even if he gets back on his phone, he knows he's not going to get a warm reception wherever he rings, is he?

50:26Yeah, but he didn't know that until he got back, did he? I think he did. I think he knew. He knew, innit? You know, in the night of hours, your stomach's gone, innit? hi all in a bit of a predicament and don't know how to play it we'll take your advice and let you know the follow results so we're i don't think it's courtroom just heavy advice needed i was seeing a girl at the start of 2025 absolute ripper of a bird she's in top condition and just an all round great person to be around. However, after what I would say was our third date, we ended up on a night out in Newcastle, both giving it some in Market Shaker.

51:08Brownie, you might know it. Market Shaker? No? Great night, good laugh, we ended up booking a local same night slash day premiering Jackpot. Does that mean you can just just booking for like on the hour, day and night? No, I think they've gone out. Sod it, should we stay? Right, yeah. Book a premiere in, they're in. We got into the room, both well-oiled, and within about four seconds, both of us never had an item of clothing on. She was phenomenal. I'm open to trying almost anything, but I don't think there was anything she wasn't keen on. Finger up the bum, rimming, deep throat, face sitting, the lot.

51:52Incredible. After a decent session, we both went to sleep woke up in the morning and this is where the issue is we've gone down for breakfast and she's quickly darted off saying she feels sick one too many drinks in brackets so she heads back to the room I've finished my coffee and then headed back as well say five minutes after as I walked in she's sitting on the bed on her phone and I kid you not the smell of shit hit me the minute I walked in the door. It was horrific. I kept a straight face, but held my breath for what felt like 10 minutes. She was bright red as she knew she stunk the place out.

52:41To make her feel better, I randomly got on the subject slash lied and said when I was 14, I had an operation, which meant I can no longer smell.

52:57Haven't been able to for the past 22 years. She straight away relaxed and thought I couldn't smell her shit. However, 14 months down the line and we are still dating and she is still banging out the smelliest shits I've ever smelt. Do I say to her, look, I wanted you not to feel awkward that night in Newcastle so I said I lost my sense of smell but you absolutely stank the room out or do I just carry on and make out that I've no sense of smell and then miraculously say it's come back if this relationship carries on for a few more months slash years she's a top bird how shall I play it see, it's schoolboy from her if you're in an hotel and you know you're having a bat just go to the pub like the toilet next to the reception and get rid I think great lie yeah from him yeah I think do you think hell no but yeah terrible lie

54:09it's made things a bit better for that situation though hasn't it yeah he's thought what can what can I do he's obviously he's felt for her He wants to make her feel better. What better thing to go with than I can't smell? Just randomly dropping it in. Oh, great night last night, by the way. Oh, did I tell you about that time in an operation at 14? I know. On my nose. I do think you need to be honest with her and go. I just wanted to. Yeah, because she's batching now, left, right and centre, isn't she? Farting. Silent ones. Silent farts. Yeah, she's on death as well. In the car. you're just on a drive and she's like thinking I've got to wear with that hands behind her back and really it stinks to shit the thing is what's she going to do like if he tells her that it was a blag is she just going to stop shitting and farting she's not going to 40 months it's not just that one night is it she's it's all them months since 40 months dark line 40 months dark line he can tell her so look I'll be honest with you it's a difficult lie to keep up with as well, you know, to keep it in your mind.

55:18You know when, ooh, tea smells good. I mean, tea looks good. Yeah. He's made life very difficult for himself. Yeah. I think she'll be sound with it. I might think so. 14 months. I mean, we've all gone into the bathroom, haven't we, and gone, fucking hell, fire. We've all done it. On both, on both, like, you've done the shit and somebody's gone, oh, dear me. Or, she's cooking up a bit of tea one night. she's in there smelling great you just go you're just in there and then you go oh my god I can smell I can smell it's a miracle the curry's working oh no she's cooked curry fuck me yeah I think that's the way to go yeah and just blame one of the ingredients like say what we put in that yeah maybe maybe build it up like I think I could google what's like been known for getting your smell back healing smell shit but shit work I'll say he's been to a hypnotist and they managed to get his smell back all the doctors lay it out for a couple of weeks just go what's that I'm sure all my smells coming back yeah then a couple of days later fucking hell of you shit you dirty cow fuck off that's us key ingredients for smell training rose lemon eucalyptus clove that's all he needs to do pull up that that google search make a brew with all those ingredients and that's for some it's worked yeah some lemon he's got a flu cold yeah stick us some lemon and eucalyptus in a cup of tea yeah job done yeah changing lives this podcast but I think they go hand in hand, but would you rather lose your taste or your smell?

57:16See, I think if you lose your smell, don't you lose a big element of your taste as well? That's what I've just said. I just said I think it goes hand in hand. All right. I thought you meant... I thought you meant, but which one would you rather? Yeah, that's the same, yeah. That's the question that he asked. If you could pick... Smell me. You'd rather lose your smell? Yeah. Yeah, taste, everything you eat in it. The uncles can't. They can't taste or smell? No. They go hand in hand, don't they? Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'm always like looking, what a shame. See, could have got away with ham pizza. You wouldn't even know it went on.

57:59I'm not blind though, I can see ham on the pizza. Oh yeah, they don't go hand in hand, do they? They're tasting the eyes. Yeah, they're two totally different things. sight and taste 40 year old dilemma hey up lads urgent advice is needed I'm a 26 year old lad who works in a small convenience store I'm single and I've been for over a year now and I've not long since been back in the game after a rough break up I have a huge dilemma on my hands lads and I don't know what to do there is a 40 year old ballet dancer who frequently visits my place of work for her energy drinks, etc. How did you know she's a ballet dancer?

58:42She's walking miles in a tutu. I don't know. She's married with two kids and is absolutely unreal. 8.5 out of 10 with a 9 out of 10 body. I tell you what, what does she have to do to be a 10 out of 10? She's a ballet dancer. And I can just imagine the position she can get herself into. She added me on Instagram a few days back and has been messaging me constantly since, telling me how much she likes me, what she would do to me in the bedroom, as well as plenty of other very sexy pictures. Red flag at all? Mate, straight away. 40-year-old, keen as mustard. I really want to fuck her, but I don't know if I can do it.

59:29Her husband is a really sound bloke who also frequently visits the store, as well as her two teenage kids. On one hand, I really want to do it, but on the other, I don't want potentially her husband barging in to my place of work when it is busy and shouting, you've been sleeping with my wife or something like that. I don't think him shouting that at you is probably the worst thing that's going to happen, is it? It's probably going to chin you. Yeah, and set your convenience store on fire. Yeah, yeah. What are you imagining here? Like a co-op kind of thing? Or a little shop? Corner shop? Londis.

1:00:08A bit like open all hours for the older people. A little bell when the door opens. What would you do, lads? P.S. She also said she wants to leave her husband for me. So it's not just a shag. It's years after by the looks of things. Which also really put me off. All the best, lads. Probably best keeping me anonymous as well in case her husband is a kosher. Lol. I mean, what on earth is going on here? We'll talk about her in a minute, but he must have some seriously impressive... Pater? ...game to have a girl declare undying love slash wanting to leave a husband whilst she's just coming in for an energy drink.

1:00:50Yeah. At what point? You know what I mean? Do you reckon he's, like, handsome with a penny sweet? He's very seductive. He's passed through the Red Bull and gone, oh, I'd love to give you a wink. Yeah, so how does that even progress? Going up the ladder, getting a jar of purr drops from top and he's got his tight pants on. Yeah, because you have a bit of a flirt, but how long does that last? Two or three minutes. Three pound, please. You look good, by the way. So he's after his advice here, lads. My advice is to fucking stay well clear. And how nice she is, stay well clear. This is only going to end up in absolute tears.

1:01:28it's more because she seems a bit tapped misery ish it's all gonna kick off if she's gonna be tree balls and packets of crisp and everything you know and you know that freestanding moment side itself that's going over yeah tell you that now the lottery the lottery thingy machine imagine like smashing the tongue painters really no floor I know so it's not worth it she's gonna get into some positions in shit we know what you should do but it sounds like she's he's not with anybody is it no no no it's hard one to turn down then in a large 22 20 26 I'd want to turn down What are you thinking of just a Quick one in the stop room Nah I think she's I don't think she's That's not right that That's not right This kind of behaviour isn't right Get an hotel Like two kids and that coming in I know I'm joking I'm joking Yeah steer well clear Two kids She's married If she wants to leave her husband Leave her husband It's not your guilt It's not his guilt to bear I've had a change of my heart.

1:02:45It's not his guilt to bear, is it? Just get it thrown up her. It's like just, I can just imagine, you know, like, this is going to sound bad, this is going to be like, you know, like, young dolls, like dolls, what young 'uns have, and the legs go all over them, that, different directions and stuff. Just imagine it being like that, you know, like, just, phew, she's flexible. Yeah, you've got, you've got like the eagle wingspan, and it's just her ankles. Yeah, get put, fuck her, no bother. Shag her. no don't then just deal with the consequences after no don't and just pray to god he comes in when it's quiet just put the turn the side on the door you can start doing that you know what petrol stations do all the time serving fruit glass could avoid any confrontation if you see him coming down i don't know what kind of shop this is it's a tough one i think it's i've thought about it a bit more now it's a tough one to turn down i know i know you're shagging at 26 aren't Yeah.

1:03:44Yeah. But I just married two kids. I still think, how has he turned this into her wanting to leave a fella? Yeah. I would say it's all in his head, but he's got the messages, hasn't he? And the photos. I reckon she's going in out time as well. Oh, aye. She's fucking off her tits. No mint sauce. She's off her tits on... One item at a time. Yeah. She's off her tits on boost. You're right, John, at 26. boring shift she's livening it up hmm but then it starts getting a bit weird don't yeah but Instagram but they've always exchanged numbers if she's sending fucking no don't was it not through Instagram messenger did you not have to accept people on that well he's accepted her honey she's sending him pictures and they've got forms of communication yeah I'm saying shagga no I don't it's just it's trouble in that yeah don't shit where you eat and he's well he's got he's got he's not eating he's not going in for any of your drinks there's meal deals and all sorts so he'll be having his lunch there yeah shagga not them them samosas they're always shit I don't trust them yeah yeah that was dry let us know how you get on with it let us know what positions you got or in right gents I think that's us for another week yeah I really enjoyed that one can we just say a massive thanks to everybody who come to Nottingham yeah Hull next week yes Hull next week we've got David Bentley back haven't we yes Redding the week after Redding the week after Glen Little bit of live entertainment Cardiff as well with James Collins Newcastle Stoke and that's just two of them for the start of the year yeah there's still a few tickets left for Stoke surprisingly what are you doing I'd say, well, he's got the award on him for the best storyteller.

1:05:44Yeah. The football world, Mark Crossley. Brilliant night every time. He's got a lot of stuff that he doesn't do on the dinners either. Yeah. Obviously, we don't record, so there'll be plenty of news still. Any more for any more? No. Ub, just before we recorded at Lightcliff Cricket Club, before they let us record there. Yeah, much appreciated. We were struggling for a venue in Halifax. And they should do this at your club. are you still playing no but they do uh they live stream the games so oh they do that oh do they oh you never said i'd have watched what's any watch on youtube yeah i think yeah obviously there's only one camera so you like somebody will play a shot and then you've just got to guess if it's gone before you know what i mean it's just you don't see the whole feel but if you're in halifax you look it were a good bar good outlook on the pitch and everything so yeah thanks to the lads at like like cliff anything else if you are in the area just let me know if that's still in that tree that's where it was yeah yeah so the church looking at the church so there's a wall there's a little gap there where you can walk through down into the field and it's just in that first tree there just let me know if it's still there i tell you what you should be bragging about it because I started watching that new Channel 4 series about, you know, they were releasing hot sewage in water and people were getting ill and people dying.

1:07:10Yeah, well, you're the same. Just shitting in graveyards and fields and stuff. That one's never going to make it into a river, is it? That's just a way. Somebody might be in woods for a picnic. Oh, well, too close to a tree. Up the cosh? I thought you were coming. No, I did take a screenshot of something where it's against the law now to call people baldy. yes it is not against the law is it not sexual discrimination that's it yeah which yep I fully agree so well speak to HR because I'm gonna continue calling you baldy so if you want if you want to take it away HR you won't crack on you are fucking baldy he calls him baldy don't you yeah yes he calls you baldy what does Rose call him fatty snaggle too fat prick

1:08:00up the cosh I'm a favourite let me tell you snaggle too fat

1:08:11Hey, hey, it's the Friday Club The weekend's here, get in that pub It's Friday Club, Bing Bang Vosch With all of your favourites from under the cuss So if you want to share a story or relive a form of glory Fart of the week or clap in them cheeks Maybe you got caught by the mother-in-law having a wank It's all here on the Friday Club It's all here on Friday Club!

1:09:04Safe! With Viso-Steuer.