Friday Club | Mrs Wangs Vixen Fingers

30:03I was more rabid than Park Ji, Sung, Mark and Peele on a Champions League night when I came to dating the local ladies. Their unusual noises and petite chassis were a pure delight compared to the cave dwellers I'm used to in York. In New York? Cave dwellers. Work at dungeons. He's not bothering her, he's offending, is he? No. However, the local work culture and stress began to run its course and cause me psychological and physical difficulties. Like Torres' downfall at Chelsea, I start to have trouble with my Wingardium Leviosa spell on my magic wand with the ladies. That means you can't get a stiffy party.

30:43Wingardium Leviosa. That is cock. It's a Harry Potter reference. Getting it up. Right, I'm glad you cleared it up. Same. The one that brought me some relief for my dismal day job was to bash my noodle into some proper king prawn fanny.

31:10It's got me there. I don't know if it's a Chinese food reference or what. I trust myself as a man of the world, and I thought I can research my way out of the problem. I tried a range of home remedies to fix my predicament. such as voodoo doll rituals, eating chicken's testicles for improved fertility, and even abstaining from choking the chopstick to build up some sexual urges. None of it worked. And I was ready to give up and accept the life of celibacy. So basically, he just can't get out of it anymore. No, and he's trying everything. I mean, how does the voodoo doll one work? Because I know like Temple of Doom, they have the voodoo doll, and he sticks the needle in it and causes pain.

31:54but what do you just make a doll with a with a big stiffy and keep pushing it up come on

32:03he's been quite insultive to a lot of people i wonder if he's writing this well he's an eight or a four if he's back here oh he's got eight energy yeah he's definitely got his eight head on any yeah but one day biggie but one day i was on holiday in japan my friends told me about a Japanese massage technique that was designed to improve sexual health. After reading, I learned its origins are from Thailand. What could possibly go wrong? After strong reservations, I decided to give it a crack to save my bamboo shoot.

32:40I found a less than convincing website which advertised this procedure and stressed that it was non-sexual. Handjobs are illegal here if it's considered a spa. interesting fact I turned up outside the establishment and to my weird amusement the restaurant next door was called Ching Chong Cock and Ball Dungeon I thought bloody hell is this an omen it was an anonymous sign indeed I headed inside to a Thai style massage parlour with lots of naff ornaments and it all smelt a little bit funny that cat with that with his arm regardless watching it go up and back down I was here on a mission after some confusing explanation and google translating the old lady at reception got the message I was here to be cured time for action the massage starts by getting clothed off and laying a towel over your family jewels on the massage table waiting for the treatment a small Thai lady let's call her Mrs Wang enters the room and greets me with, are you ready, sir?

33:51Not near for the Mrs. Wang. She's dealing with his popular name in most parts. This will hurt a bit, she said. She slowly ran her hands under the towel and reaches for my nether region. Feeling extremely embarrassed, she started fumbling around like a blind lesbian in a fish market. This is where the violation began.

34:19This might be my favourite email, this bastard. I remember her cold hands gently prying on my testicles, feeling for a certain spot. After a few fumbling minutes, she had settled into position. Nothing could prepare me for what's next. Slowly, she started to pull on my dumplings.

34:51harder and harder longer and deeper she went I'm lost she was pulling on his dumplings

35:04I sound like Muckley with his gun

35:13it felt like she was going to pull them off my body My plum puddings were being pulled like a French monarch on the torture rack. She kept pulling back and forth. Back and forth. The agony, unbearable.

35:34I'm gone. I'm gone. Oh, Mr. McChurchy. I begged her to stop. But she just replied, Take your medicine, boy.

35:50after what felt like an eternity of abuse to my party pouch she explained the treatment was over dripping in sweat and tears worse than brownie in a 20 18 to 25 cheap holiday resort needless i paid a reception and limped home trying to not think about what had just happened getting to sleep that evening was difficult I felt confused and strange about what had just happened my happy sack was sore and pruney and visibly enlarged after the blunt trauma of Mrs Wang's cold vice fingers

36:35as the day dawned and I began to muster from a restless night dreaming of picking grapes And to my great shock and surprise, I found my one word was also awake and had risen like Lazarus from the dead. No way. Not only was he awake, he was harder than a crunching Lucas Radaby tackle. Why is like a random Leeds United reference just coming?

37:01Winking in the morning sun, I decided to give the boy a test run off the wrist. I couldn't waste this erection, which was stronger than Eric Cantona's karate kick. Chuck man, you win. When it came to the finale, it sprayed all over like an unmanned hosepipe, making more mess than Gaz's dentist chair. What a 180 for my little fella. I can now get back to pillaging the locals and it has served me well ever since. God bless Mrs Wang's ball-bashing technique. I was cured at last. There's a whole new world out there, lads. go explore the different cultures and excitements. Something that on the face of it was ludicrous ended up saving me self-esteem.

37:47I should have known a place next to Ching Chong Cock and Ball Dungeon was always going to be interesting. Sadly, the restaurant and its cheap free floor has closed now, but I'll always remember it for my strange schlong-saving encounter up the kosh. Live show in Hong Kong, please. No, it's just sometimes the natural remedies are the best. That's got me, that one. It's bad, though. We're not losing you. Imagine never getting a hard on again. Or thinking you're never going to get a hard on again. If there's somebody out there listening that can't get an erection, get your dumplings pulled. Yeah, but it sounds like...

38:25I know, but if you're not doing it right, it's just unnecessary pain, isn't it? Yeah. You need Mrs Wang's fingers for that. She knows what she's doing. It took a professional a couple of minutes to find the spot, didn't it? If you remember. Have you ever thought about one of that a pilot world? What, for medicinal purposes or just in general? Just in general. I'd like to go to, there's nice islands, I think. You've been, aren't you? I'm going to Japan this year for my holidays. Bit of J-pop. Konnichiwa! Konnichiwa! That's the plan this year. Yeah. I don't, I definitely wouldn't eat from them fucking places outside the street, man.

39:03No. You know when there's just a stick with loads of scorpions on a summit? You've got to try a local delicacy, John. Fuck that. If it's not chicken chow, man, it can fuck off. Oh, Hans Bean, he's tried all that. All the animals that you've just said. Insects. Insects. All them scorpions. What's in your donna? Some of the... All kinds of shite. I'd like to go to one of them ping-pong things. Thingy moon parties. Full moon parties. Full mooners. but they're chaos what's that it'll be too late for me at 12 o 'clock I'm in bed but now I don't know I don't know if it appeals to me that part at will I think it'd be good for good entertainment you'd be in places that you don't like a bit like Pilkington I could be very ratty especially if I'm hungry because I've got a head now this is an example of how John gets a bit ratty when he's pooler we had some O 'Neill's strip pictures taken last week and John got a bit paranoid that we were taking the piss and I just heard I'll start swinging I'll start swinging just having a laugh just having a laugh you thought it was a bit of jovial bantam no right well it were you'd moved all the bins outside hadn't you so I thought there was going to be some sort of rugby tackle coming like me ending up in the bin that's what I thought I thought they lined these bins up so I could end up in one of these and I was like I'll be swinging Not today That's paranoia that Not today Get yourself to Thailand The queue for that over there So good So good So good New markdowns Up to 70 % off Are at Nordstrom Rack stores now Stock up and stay big On shoes Tops Dresses Accessories And more must haves for summer Join the Nordiclub To unlock exclusive discounts Shop new arrivals first And more Plus buy online And pick up at your favorite rack store for free great brands great prices that's why you rack right can I go in with a serious one am I losing the Arnie slot bonjour shaggers I'm in a bit of a dilemma and I need to tell us whether I'm losing the Arnie slot plot so I've been with the wife now for 10 years recently split the past few months ago but getting things back on track.

41:33She is off on a night out on the town and bear in mind that the town is a 30 minute taxi ride away from home which she has always come home in a taxi on a night out ever since we got together. Now, randomly one night out which is on the horizon she informed me she wants to stay in a hotel with her friend which I thought was strange because she has never even mentioned about staying in a hotel when she has always come home. Am I losing the plot and it's just an innocent night out where she wants to stay out with her friend who lives five, ten minutes from town, by the way, who's also single? Or is there more dark and sinister meaning behind her staying out in a hotel when her home is 30-minute taxi drive home?

42:18Basically, do I need to get in contact with a drone pilot from the previous episode? Please help a fellow kosher out. love it blah blah blah up the front and cosh his head's in tatters here you can see just reading it he's you know the taxi home and the distance from it he's in bits thing is though right for me if a a mate lives five ten minutes away she could just go and shag somebody there couldn't she so are they just wanting to make it a bit different the thing I've taken from that had recently split a few months ago. So there's every chance that there could be somebody else being on the scene, still on the scene.

43:05Regardless of whether she stays in a hotel, regardless of whether she gets a taxi home, I think there needs to be a clear the decks. Discussion. I'm sure he had sent it his head that he's going to, there's somebody at work or there's somebody that has given him attention, but they've been together 10 years, which is like a prison sentence. What do they call it? Normally seven-year. Ten-year itch. They call it the ten-year itch. Well, I think you get to the point where you have the ten-year itch, the 11-year itch, the 12-year itch, and so on and so on. But they split up and obviously realise that they've got something worth fighting for.

43:40Have the chat, clear the decks. Because she could be honest and say, do you know what, I had my head turned, but I'm getting back with you for a reason. So I think you need to have that conversation. why does a single mate want to stop in a hotel then just to make it a special night I think maybe not special with a fella coming but is she going out with a mate I don't know any of these things though do we no I don't like these mate what I can take from that his head's in tatters but I think he needs to have yeah just have the conversation he needs to have the conversation with her doesn't he because then they can lay the cards on the table and go forward from there and then you can't move forward if there's no trust involved or maybe get a wig some glasses and a moustache and follow her Mrs Doubtfire and then you don't have to have the conversation and then you find out from there I can just tell I don't have his head's in tatters you need to have the conversation look this is what I'm thinking you never want to do that before nah you want to stop in a hotel we're just getting back together after splitting up for however long If something is going on, just let us know and then we can move forward.

44:55Exactly. Yeah. Clear the decks and her reaction, her response will tell him everything. Yeah. That's what I'm thinking. We all win with that then? Yeah. Or? Oh, here we go. This could be anything. I don't know, yeah. Or Shaggy Best, mate. Yeah, something like that. Psychic. Remember that one? Snapchat. On the phone. Snapchat Psychic. Oh. Mm-hmm. A random ad that night. Yes, random ad, get in touch. I think you had plans to go and see somebody in a hotel tonight. Am I right? I'm getting the feeling, I'm getting the feeling. Well, yeah, yeah. Well, then you know. Obviously, that's the joke. The most ridiculous I've ever heard, given.

45:37No, but you need to do something about it. Just talk. Does he know which hotel it is? You're thinking turn up, aren't you? Dress up? Maid? Lamp? but it depends because what if she has seen somebody that in that few months she's met somebody and she's undecided whether she's going to go back to him but she'll know he'll know if he has it out with her face to face that's the best idea if there's somebody else just tell us and we can work but you won't think there'll be somebody else would you if she's like trying to go back to him and make it work and that do you prefer Ching Chong's Cockerball Dungeon yeah to that sort of stuff yeah 100 % because I won't like to think like our advice and sway decisions one way or other on stuff like that on this yeah just reading it i can kind of relate to these heads in bits but i think we can end up filling in the gaps that something's going on that isn't and planted even planted even more seeds but I think whatever I'm planting a conversation is the best thing to do regardless yeah agreed I think you've made an even more paranoid now is there anything going on if there is we can work through it but I just need you to be honest he's got a mack and glasses on now and he's going down to the hotel he's going down to see something oh no no not to the hotel I'm having an eye out I'm having a couple of drinks while I'm watching you turning up with a club sandwich and a towel over your arm I knew it Hiya Sandra You alright You have a good night I forgot your sandwich I just thought You might be hungry Imagine how much Of a dick you'd feel Oh yeah That's it then I think I think she's See to be fair For me If I went to Sheffield If I went to Sheffield Which is half an hour Forty minutes away With time you messed about Getting a taxi home You might as well stop on her But you've never done it before Well yeah You split up You've got back together Yeah fair enough all right lads long time listener second time emailer new questions given your recent influx of fanny slash new female listeners the balls out piss has sparked quite a revolution in shitters across the country as men proudly talk to strangers about piss techniques whilst their manhood is out on display a question from my good lady who is fascinated by the idea that men have never previously shared knowledge.

48:11Is there a similar technique that any birds have to prevent a bit of piss dribble? Oh. So we're putting it out there to the female listenership. If it's out on the flip side that they can do to... Yeah. Assuming a wipe. Or a shake. Do you do the old... Lettuce? Yeah. I don't know. I'm only saying what the email's telling me. Not your words. I would also reiterate my previous request, slightly amended. If this is read out and she gets any good answers, I get a soapy tit wank. Oh, there we go. Basically, as I said, I'm doing the Lord's work. I don't know if there are any other methods. Cheers, lads.

48:54Wipe, shake, hand-dry a headstand. Oh, that's a good one. But the thing is, if there's a bit of a thingy, is it going to just blow it further down into the water cleavage? Pass the belly button. Yeah. Surely a wipe's sufficient, isn't it? Or maybe, I mean, I haven't been in the ladies' toilets recently. Maybe Dyson, you know, they're always innovating, aren't they? Maybe they've got an undercarriage. What, like, just like a thing? You just slip your flute in.

49:24So basically, all I'm doing is I'm just trying to get this. I'm just going to get this little bit of a tit-wank. That's all I'm trying to do. You ever had one? You ever had a tit-wank? Not to completion. No? You ever had a tit-wank? No. Overrated? I don't really know if I've ever had one. Yeah, I just think they're overrated. I don't know. They're not going to get their purchase on the... Around the whole of the shaft unless they're like proper saggy baps. But even then, it's... You don't want that big and flapping that it disappears. A bit like French baguette. So you can wrap them around it.

50:02But then it's just not the same feeling, is it? Same veracity. Is it just more of a novelty? I think so. But the thing is that, you're all soapy, I might as well slip it in. You're that close to the mouth, aren't you? You'd prefer... Yeah, but again, just a bit of novelty. You're like, whee, there we go. Just a bit of a tease. Yeah. More of a titillation. What about under the armpit or something? Well, it's a similar type of thing, isn't it? What? I bet you get better friction under the armpit. Yeah. So she clots the armpit, puts a bit of her spit or lube on it, you're getting some good friction there under the pit, as long as she's shaved.

50:42Are you saying this is what you like? No, or back at knee. You can go back at knee. Like the knee fart? Yeah. What, just doing that down? Yeah, yeah. Oh, oh, oh, oh. But no, so if there's any answers... Back at knee armpits, so one step away from shagging a belly button. Yeah, I'm just trying to get my soapy tit went. like he must like them what about like a crease you know if she's heavy it's so be better than oily do you think suds dry it out won't they you think you don't get like you can get you can get like stingage as well if you get get a bit of soap down the jacques hold on a minute let me just correct myself, down the eye of the penis.

51:29The mint stuff. That could take on all you think. I'll wake you up. That can be nasty gear, that, can't it? The old mint. But again, like we've said before, it's all autos for courses, isn't it? Whatever flicks your switch. I bet there's people who are really into the soapy whaps. Like it's a thing. Foam burst. That could be messy. I think that would be sensitive as well. and at the end of it you end up with a really nice smelling penis yeah but that's a bonus yeah just clean as a whistle as long as you've took your load out and then she just finishes the rest of the soap off it's a beautiful smelling penis I think this is a perfect segue into this because Andrew Lonergan and his wife Jen have released Funk Off Funk Off a sanitising spray for sports kit and footwear you could do with this Chris This isn't even a criticism.

52:26You can use it on all your clothes, though, not just your sportswear. I mean, they do stink, even when you wash them. Sometimes the kit is... It's got that... I thought you just meant my clothes, then. Your shoes and my gym kit sometimes reeks even after it's been through the wash. Yeah. But this Funk Off Pro helps eliminate boot and kit order, kills 99.99 % of bacteria, it's antifungal it's antiviral and it's antibacterial that's what I need so we're going to put the link you can get bad athletes foot don't you I do do you know what I've got weird feet though do you want to squirt look at that little toe you don't get much air in there that's what I need that is perfect for what I need little hobbit feet so whether you're kids that's perfect I mean stock and filler for Christmas perfect but so i'm assuming after the gym or after it's out the washing machine give it a squirt in your trainers in your trainers in your socks you haven't got any though have you if you're if you go to the gym right and you're and you're after a bird at the gym this is going to take you to a no new level but you're not going to smell are you when you're trying to crack on yeah fungal infections yeah that's your lemtrotters and all yeah mushrooms and all sides So I will put the link.

53:49We're going to put the link in the episode. Have a look. This episode is brought to you by Fox one. Watch all 104 matches of the FIFA world cup live in 4k for just$19.99 a month with three days free. Build your own multi-view, choose up to three streams and follow player spotlights. Stay on top of every moment with live stats, highlights and instant replays. The FIFA World Cup, streaming live on Fox 1, offers a subject to change. See Fox.com for complete terms and conditions. Well, Lorenzo, the pitch looked good. Yeah, so green. USA Keeper was decent enough. Didn't have much to do. Ugh, 99 minutes.

54:33Not a single goal. Well, Bet365 sure came through, though. I bet$10 and got$150 in bonus bets, just for signing up. At least someone scored. Bet 365. Winning is everything. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. 21 plus only. Must be physically located in Illinois. Tees and Sees apply. In-app only. I shag Parky's look-alike. You want fucking sex with me. God bless you. Hi lads. I doubt the person involved listens to this, but names have been changed. Most of the lads who listen know me as my nickname Socks, so they'll know who it is. What the wheezes is? That was another laugh You're just getting two proper laughs off me then They usually bake International Cochuria Usually pub chat, blah blahs And keep up the good work Helping lads all over and treating us to some right laughs To give some context I was out in the US Playing football and studying at university But it's a melting pot of loads of lads from all over However some things are still the same We all love football and a drink.

55:43It was my birthday weekend, which falls around Halloween time. I gathered up the troops for a night out on the drink to go to the local horse racing. The night went as expected. Good laugh and pints were flowing after the races. One of the lads recommended this place that was hosting a fancy dress competition. At the place, it wasn't what we expected. We'd have been very average talent-wise, but nonetheless we got a few drinks and a couple of shots down us. The night with the boys seemed to fizzle down and an Uber was booked. I decided to go to the toilet before we called it a night. On the way to the pisser, I caught the attention of a lady.

56:22Doubt she would be listening, but let's call her Jane. Might as if she was. Let's say more on the larger side, and she was taller than me, built like Parkey. The usual, oh my God, I love your accent, where are you from? came out. And I told her, I'm from the UK. It's hard to explain where Wales is to an American. But this is where her eyes lit up and she explained she'd never been with a British man. Ooh, straight in. Straight in, Chris. In my drunken state, I said, well, that could change. Oh, you assic, suave bastard. And this is where the night took a quick change of direction. Jane asked why weren't I dressed up and I told Jane it was my birthday night out and we'd just been to the horse races she enthusiastically said let's get shots by this time my mate came back saying the Uber is here which I said I'm going to stay here and looked over at my new centre back partner he looked her up and down and said to me are you sure?

57:29I said yeah fuck it'll be a laugh as my mate got into the Uber all I could hear was one of the Mexican boys laughing and shouting Torta which is Mexican slang for overweight now that's out of order that is out of order hey Ringo what a shagadonkey when Jane arrived back with not one but three shots just for me I had a feeling this was going to be interesting now I was by myself and with my new CB partner and her friends which I can only describe as a group of misfits given it was Halloween I knew some weren't dressed up and that had interesting choice of clothes. I didn't go into a fancy dress party not in fancy dress but nobody not really knowing if you're in it or not.

58:13That's... I know. Bad. Bad. A few more drinks with the midfits and explaining where Wales is to a bunch of Americans. Jane came up to me. The midfits. Raggy dolls. Raggy dolls. Jane came up to me and said our Uber's here. Let's go. Off we went to her house. Arriving at the house, before we got to the bedroom, I needed to go to the pisser and give myself a pep talk. All of the house seemed normal until we got to the bedroom. The bedroom had a little door opening, only about three foot tall. I asked Jane, what's that door opening? She said, oh, that's me cat's room. I had a look inside and it was a full kitted out room for her cat.

59:02with cat toys and a litter box with some litter on the floor. This didn't bother me and we got down to business while me and my new centre-back partner were having a good game. Has she had this built? I've got like, you know, like the room under the stairs where you put your over and that. I've got that in but like smaller. But this is purpose-built. Yeah, like I've got to join her around and actually build a frame. Yeah, little door frame. Act. Yeah. She stopped and looked at me dead in the eyes and said, I love you

59:35that and the cat crack I'm off I'm not getting my legs to my shock I was taken aback and said sorry what did you say she then burst into tears and started crying oh no and ran off into the cat's room in the cat's room she's made it just big enough so she can get she's made it just big enough so she can get in just in case of the emergencies. I mean, he's bad enough having to storm out of a room but having to open the door, get on your hands and knees, crawl in and then slam the door. Probably putting cat litter. Me with my wand still at attention, I didn't know what to do. I followed her into the room.

1:00:18Let's go to the cat room! I'm holding it all, borrowers. Still naked and at attention. On his hands and knees. You alright?

1:00:31it just went in a lictor she sat on the floor having a cigarette she passed me one you can't have a fucking cat room she passed me one and I started to smoke and talk she was explaining to me how she'd just broke up with her boyfriend and wanted to be with someone I was confused and I just wanted a birthday shag and be on the road now I'm sat in a cat's room having a smoke with cat litter in my crack. I told her not to worry and just spend time focusing on her and have some fun. He's playing blind, isn't he? He's brownie-esque. Get hold of that scratch pole. She cheered up and she was happy to carry on before she had to tidy herself up in the toilet.

1:01:19God bless her. I got out of the cat's room and waited for Jane on the bed before I heard her yell, Who goes out first? The cat rule. Yeah, they're both in there. One's got to crawl out first. Yeah, she's going to seize us to share his badge, isn't she? Human centipede tackle this. I'd like to think it's her. You think? She's a big lass as well. Do you wait until she gets out before you start crawling? Or do you get nose in the oop? Give it a couple of seconds. Well, I got out of the cat's room and waited for Jane on the bed before I heard her yell, what the fuck have you done to me toilet? I was baffled because all I did was have a piss.

1:01:58She came charging up the stairs, hearing her footsteps from the room. I felt Jack from Jack and the Giant Slayer. She came into the room accusing me of breaking her tap on the sink, and the toilet was now flooded. I denied anything she was throwing my way and that I never broke her tap. She went back downstairs to look at the broken tap. I then hurriedly got changed and got my belongings and took a cigarette for the road. I heard Jane, can you come down and help me with this? I said yeah I'll be a minute and I quickly ran down the stairs past the toilet to see a naked Jane looking at the sink still naked?

1:02:36yeah figuring how to fix the broken tap with a decent sized puddle on the floor and straight out the door never to be seen again oh so he's left a turret well he's left a turret she's bollocking her not even touched the tap not my greatest of moments because I feel like I could have helped her but I didn't even wash my hands after the piss so it couldn't have been me I had a great time explaining what happened to the lads when I saw them the next day I just wanted to warn anyone that is planning on coming over for the World Cup next summer to be careful of a party lookalike with a room for her cat in her bedroom what was in her bedroom?

1:03:10yeah that's what I mean bathroom, neither bathroom unless you're a plumber love the work lads if you do anything for the World Cup next summer give us a message and I'll see if I can accommodate where is he? shout out to all the lads in the GSC not sure where that is but alright lads GSC lads all the best socks no he didn't he's lying he didn't shag park his lookalike no he didn't he nearly he shared a cigarette in the cat's yeah in the pussy palace as soon as the I love you and then the cat thing I think I might be getting off you're going before we even get onto the broken tap yeah yeah I'm not getting the cat's broom where was the cat where was the cat on the prowl yeah right gents I think that's us for this week yeah I think it is we would like to wish everybody especially the patrons a merry merry Christmas everybody if we want to be back until Boxing Day yeah we've had all that loads drank loads been merry no arguing a lot of arguing Christmas Day what is there just pissed up like yeah I've seen it on EastEnders and that.

1:04:24There's always some of them. Yeah. There's always mad crashes and stuff. Explosions. Drums coming off the tracks. So, a fantastic Christmas and been merry. Yeah. What's your one tip? What's your Christmas Day drink? Morning drink? If you're feeling a bit ropey Christmas Day, have a port and brandy. Do you get pissed Christmas Eve? I have done in the past. A port and brandy sorted us out. like a snowball Peroni but then you get full and you get tired then you sleep yeah that's a perfect Christmas day for me right up the cosh up the cosh up the cosh hey hey it's the Friday Club the weekend's here get in that pub it's Friday Club bing bang bosh with all of your favourites from under the cosh so if you want to share a story or relive a form of glory Futter the wheat or clapping them cheeks Baby, you got caught by the mother-in-law Having a wank It's all here on the Friday Club

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