In short
The episode is a chaotic “Friday Club” catch-up mixing travel/honeymoon anecdotes, dating-app disasters, and listener speak-pipes. The hosts joke about being “in the splash zone” (lots of bodily humor) and about planning nights out (Coco Bongo, Kendall Calling), including a tent incident where a man accidentally farts/“backs up” and nearly gets caught by neighbors. They also discuss health updates via speak-pipes (“update on piles”) and a catfishing email where a woman is “30 kilograms heavier” than her photos.
Key guest story
a “Double Darts Club” double-date setup via an app (now replaced by Tinder’s double feature). One friend (the “Pug”) matches with a profile expecting a petite brunette, but the real date is a stark mismatch; he drinks heavily, while the other friend (“Crouchy”) ends up kissing/going further. They also bring on “George” to discuss his own catfishing experience and whether he should lower standards (he claims a drop from ~7 to ~4).
Notable examples
the disabled-toilet “private” moment; a dating-app “filthy sex” encounter where the man is chased naked after the woman screams “my dad’s just died”; and a debate about whether darts is a “real sport” versus just an excuse to party.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOTech Mix-Up: Riverside and Zoom
0:30 to 2:59
Discussion about using Riverside instead of Zoom for recording.
“You fucking sticks me up again, ain't you?”
Weekend Adventures: Coco Bongo
2:59 to 4:12
Sharing experiences from a weekend outing at Coco Bongo.
“Basically, our latest night so far, apart from Saturday we went to Coco Bongo's, has been 10 past nine.”
Camping Mishaps and Laughter
4:12 to 6:06
A humorous story about a camping incident involving a fart.
“Do you know, it's like when he wears his after-dinner attire as well.”
Dealing with Awkward Moments
6:06 to 8:09
The aftermath of an embarrassing camping experience and its effects.
“And I could feel the tummy rumbling a bit.”
Updates and Listener Interactions
8:09 to 9:50
Responses to listener questions and updates on previous topics.
“in I saw a complaint that somebody yeah somebody defecated next to somebody's tent and stuff.”
The Double Darts Club Disaster
9:50 to 14:00
A recounting of a disastrous double date experience.
“This story comes from the same friend group as Keith and Ratty, who featured in the Thailand story a few weeks ago.”
A Night Out at the Darts Club
14:00 to 15:00
The crew shares a humorous story about a wild night at a darts club involving a pug and a woman named Nessa.
“The pug proceeds to put away around eight pints of Guinness, spend as much time at the bar as he does chatting to Nessa.”
The Pug's Dating Dilemma
15:00 to 16:00
Discussion about the pug's romantic struggles and the group's humorous suggestions for him to improve his dating life.
“At one point, a group of students come up to the pug, point at him and start laughing.”
Cake of Commemoration
16:00 to 17:00
The crew humorously discusses a cake designed to commemorate the pug's lengthy dry spell and the hilarious implications of it.
Dating Profile Red Flags
17:00 to 18:00
The group critiques a dating profile photo, discussing the importance of honesty in online dating and what constitutes a red flag.
“I thought that was a photo from back at fun.”
Show all 31 chapters
Lowering Standards in Dating
18:00 to 19:00
The conversation shifts to whether one should lower their expectations in dating, featuring George's input on his current dating standards.
“And it goes both ways, like we've mentioned.”
George Joins the Conversation
19:00 to 20:00
George joins the discussion, providing his perspective on dating expectations and past experiences.
“So are you thinking, like, just anything to get a shot off?”
Unexpected Dating Experiences
20:00 to 21:00
The hosts share stories of unexpected experiences and disappointments in dating, particularly George's recent encounter.
“Where would you say at the moment your standards are?”
Getting Back in the Game
21:00 to 22:00
Discussion on George's hesitance to re-enter the dating scene and the group's opinions on getting back into dating after a long break.
“I mean, if her friends are watching this, George, she'll know exactly who it is because you're now fully visible.”
Airport Boarding Pet Peeves
22:00 to 23:00
One listener shares a pet peeve about airport boarding processes, sparking a lively debate among the hosts about queuing etiquette.
“I always thought you're a man of integrity, George.”
The Dreaded Boarding Queue
23:00 to 24:00
The hosts discuss their aversion to boarding queues at airports and share personal anecdotes about missed flights.
“I hope the next time George has sex lintercourses, He's 47 years old and he's in Thailand with a fella.”
Queuing Habits and Travel Anxiety
24:00 to 25:00
Discussion on their different approaches to queuing at the airport and how it reflects their personalities and travel habits.
Final Boarding Calls and Travel Dynamics
25:00 to 26:00
Exploration of the tension and excitement surrounding final boarding calls at the airport, highlighting different reactions.
“We've missed a flight once and almost missed at least two more.”
Pre-Flight Banter
28:00 to 30:01
The hosts engage in humorous banter about boarding a flight and their experiences with travel.
“I've only ever missed one fight and that were ours.”
Pre-Flight Banter
30:04 to 30:55
The hosts engage in humorous banter about boarding a flight and their experiences with travel.
“Obviously, you know I'm not very technical.”
Anonymous Confession on Obsessions
31:51 to 42:00
An anonymous listener shares a humorous and explicit story about teenage obsessions and encounters.
“Please keep this strictly private and don't use any names.”
Dating Preferences and Age Gaps
42:00 to 47:50
The group discusses preferences for dating older partners as they age.
“Little did he know that smashing my car window was probably calmer for smashing the urn.”
A Wild Dating App Encounter
48:44 to 55:48
A hilarious recount of a disastrous dating app experience involving unexpected events.
“The story last week of the lad meeting a bigger girl on a dating app reminded me of a story my maid had due in our travelling days.”
Reflections on the Experience
55:48 to 56:01
The hosts reflect on the absurdity and lessons from the dating story shared.
Dating and First Impressions
56:01 to 57:55
Discussion about perceptions and judgments in dating scenarios.
“I mean he said she looked like a smack head mm-hmm he's already got doubts had him serious doubts Do you know his point about on the first date?”
T-Shirt Fashion Debate
57:55 to 1:00:05
Exploring the appropriateness of wearing band t-shirts and their implications.
“and we were talking about F1 t-shirts and people who wear them are pretty much fucking nonces.”
The Role of T-Shirts in Identity
1:00:05 to 1:04:23
Debate on how t-shirts reflect personal identity and social connections.
“Yeah, I've got a few band t-shirts, haven't you?”
Controversial Opinions on Darts
1:04:23 to 1:10:01
Discussion on the legitimacy of darts as a sport and cultural perceptions.
“I got a big red T-shirt with a big M on.”
The Nature of Sports and Competition
1:10:01 to 1:10:47
Discussion about what constitutes a sport and examples like Tiddlywinks.
“Chess is officially recognised as sport by the International Olympic Committee.”
George's Dry Spell and Swinging
1:10:47 to 1:11:44
Light-hearted banter about George's romantic life and humorous references to swinging.
“So are you putting it in the bin, Chris?”
Trip Highlights and Farewells
1:11:44 to 1:13:06
Conversation about upcoming travel plans, a booze cruise, and humorous goodbyes.
“To be fair, I've seen a few who might be swinging.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:28This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. Republican Republic. You fucking sticks me up again, ain't you? Why? What's Riverside? Right? I come back to my room three hours ago and I downloaded Zoom, make sure I've got Zoom, come to get on, we're on Riverside. We've got to shift technology, John, you know, with a few of these coming up. Bet you should have let me know that before, like, five to four. What are you drinking anyway? This is an all-inclusive app. So get one of these cups. You get probably double and they keep it cold. Lager, obviously. You know it's lager. Do they sell them at the hotel?
1:25No. No, Katie bought it on plane. oh so you've got your own yeah it's Rhodes Island Greece nowhere near Greece er but yeah it's the future it's like when when Alan Partridge took his own 15 inch plate to the buffet exactly and another little act for you so you can order that so you've got double your amount then you get a normal glass of lager get that as well keep every mouthful top up every mouthful top up a bit Barry what's if you're on what yeah no I would say it's probably the best thing I've ever done I don't I don't I don't need to go to the bar as much and it keeps it cold by the way until you haven't taken your jabs I've took I'm supposed to take one today, but I've not.
2:30I know. I don't blame you either. You're on your honeymoon job. I know. I'll be honest with you. We're on scales this morning, and I've put£4 on. Have you been bloated yet? No. Afternoon naps? Not once. Every day. After lunch? Yeah, we've not been in court, apart from Saturday. we went to Coco Bongo's Saturday. So basically... How's your moods? All right. Basically, our latest night so far, apart from Saturday we went to Coco Bongo's, has been 10 past nine. 10 past nine is our latest night. So the plan were, we're going to Coco Bongo's, we're getting picked up at seven, we're going to be back at, well, he said, half 12.
3:24A furious at that fucker and all, because Minibus didn't leave till half one. So I was raging at that. Minibus left Coco Bongo's at half one. So got pissed in the morning, went to bed at two o 'clock till five, got up, went to Coco Bongo's, managed to last the night, going at three o 'clock. What chap did you want? I forgot to fetch it, you know. I could have sold a few and all. No, it's still for sale, the book, by the way. But I do look like that cunt off Benidorm. You know, the one who works at hairdressers. Have you ever watched it? It's the best dog. I did see another lookalike. It's the new look, John.
4:05Have you seen Graham Hall from Dogs Behaving Very Badly? Yeah, the one who wears the Nicky bone. Yeah. That's sound. I've not seen it. Have you not? Do you know, it's like when he wears his after-dinner attire as well. He gets the tweed involved in that. We haven't done? Yeah, very much so, yeah. I need some soda cream. What for? I need some soda cream. Bit of chaffage. You've not put that much on. For the thighs? Are your bellies rubbing together? For the one wood. The one wood has been absolutely on fire.
4:59Are you on your honeymoon? I know, yeah. I know. I know. They are too all right. You've been to Kendall, haven't you? Yeah, I got back this afternoon. I was ready for an afternoon sleep, but you've booked a boat trip tomorrow, so here we are.
5:16Attention-seeking Chris, we're at, weren't he? Tell you what. I'll wear a Mary Poffins in Qatar. I'll get loads of attention. Yeah, sound. I'll wear a little white fucking nightie in Kendall Calling. Oh, everybody will see it's Chris Brown from Wondercoach. If it's a group fancy dress, it's fine, isn't it? Teaming. Yeah. But, yeah, it was a good weekend. It was a good weekend. Fun to be out. I dropped a bit of a booboo. You know, last night, last night in the tent, and my mum and dad dropped Juno off. I've never heard her laugh so much in her life. She dropped her off on a Saturday, so we had her Saturday-Sunday.
6:01This is last, we got back about one o 'clock, all just getting ready. And I could feel the tummy rumbling a bit. And it was a silent, just a tsss. I thought it was safe. but then the smell oh especially have you sit you said no but in a confined space obviously you're in a tent rose and dune are like oh my god it stinks so but then a couple of minutes later i could i could feel the rumbling again but it's like one in the morning so there's lines of tents there's nobody about you know you've got the odd stragglers coming back at that time so I thought for the greater good for the good of my wife and my 10 year old daughter I backed up yeah I backed up and I just it was already half a zit down so I just backed my bottom out the door let fly this one had a bit more audio about it it was a good old all that followed was oh my god so you have shit out the tent it was only a fart it wasn't a shit but the family of four next door had just pulled up stealth mode I had no idea I nearly nearly nearly brought mother's head off the judo we're laughing for a bit you know like she went to sleep and every now and again I'd just hear her chuckling again to herself did you have to did you own it or did you I heard the oh my god and then I went oh my god there's people outside there's people outside do you know in hysterics then and I did the half zip peep and could see them getting in getting in their tent I should have gone for the apology but yeah you should have says as far as camping goes at Kendall like just to poop is that not pretty tame there must be so much more going off at that guy I imagine there is in I saw a complaint that somebody yeah somebody defecated next to somebody's tent and stuff.
8:15But most people are respectable. Any speak pipes? Here we go. I've got one from Richard here.
8:29Can we have an update on piles, please? Oh, that's it.
8:42I mean, it's a polite request. It is. We're going to have to get that next week. I'm not sure if he wants them to be still really sure or got better. Thing is, he plays it down when we ask. He just answers, yeah, fine, move on, change conversation. There's absolutely loads of the speak pipes coming. I mean, George is in control in the background, so we don't even know what's coming. by the way George were in control the other day wasn't he when he went on his date yeah there's an email here that relates to getting catfished because apparently she was 30 kilograms heavier than what she first met out is that right George
9:34George?
9:39Has he just put a fart on? He's also in charge of the sound effects. George, it's not... We've all been catfists. It's not your fault. Are you a total of the ning now then? Yes, this is called... The Double Darts Club Disaster. This story comes from the same friend group as Keith and Ratty, who featured in the Thailand story a few weeks ago. Can you remember the name Ratty? Is that not the one where they all end up having sex and that? Yeah, because he fancied a girl, didn't he? And then she got it on with his mates, Mrs. and Shaston, if they wanted a three or foursome, but he couldn't do it with his mates' missus.
10:30After hearing that story, these lads have been avid listeners ever since and after much deliberation have given their very loose permission for the following events to be shared. Right, lads, this all starts with the download of the Double app, which has now become null and void thanks to Tinder introducing its own double date feature. So it used to be a separate thing where you sign up and you commit to double dating. I'm guessing. Are you on that, Georgie? Random little fart. Get another fart out there, George.
11:11Sorry, can I just check? Do you go on a random double date? Is it like Uber share a ride? I can only... I mean, we're going to have to do a little bit of digging on that, but do you join up with your mate? And the girl turns up with her mate? And you... I don't know. All the lads in our friend group downloaded it in an effort to organise a few group nights out with a group of girls. In hindsight, this was very ambitious. Two of my mates, the Pug, a nickname started by his ma because he was always passing out, spreg-headled on the couch, and Crouchy, Crouchy's getting a lot of air time who is genuinely about 7 foot tall match with two girls who live near Crouchy's hometown the Pugs match was a petite brunette about 7 out of 10 and Crouchy's looked decent enough too so they arranged to meet in a local booze and darts club with the plan being that the Pug would stay Crouchy's afterwards as he lived just outside the city Not the most exotic of first date locations, is it?
12:25The old darts club. It's a very one-sided... They basically just want to go out for a few pints with his mate and get some female attention. Yeah. Yeah, whilst playing darts. Yeah. The lads were dewy-eyed and excited to test out this new method of pulling women, preening themselves and chiming into the group chat with constant updates. eventually he pull up with a boozer have a few settlers and after a while see two girls getting out of a taxi the pug's face immediately drops and he goes as white as he possibly can considering the liver poison he's already consumed he turns to crouchy and says i think that's them crouchy doesn't believe him and assumes it's a joke calling this girl nessa from gavin and stacy would probably be a bit too generous.
13:24Crouchy's match wasn't exactly what was advised on the profile either, but given the stark contrast between the pug's expectations and the reality of his date, Crouchy completely loses at laughing and has to gather himself before going in. They eventually make it to the pub, and the pug is absolutely livid. He's debating whether to flee the scene or just suck it up and get on with it. He decides on an action plan, which Crouchy can confirm, spend the next two hours absolutely sculling Guinness and minimise all interaction. He's just going to fuck her off and drink. The pug proceeds to put away around eight pints of Guinness, spend as much time at the bar as he does chatting to Nessa.
14:10Meanwhile, Crouchy is actually cracking on with his one at the table. eventually Nessa makes her move and starts kissing the pug Crouchy who can see everything unfolding across the table can't help but burst out laughing Nessa then suggests they go somewhere a bit more private and by private she means the disabled toilets of a darts club I can imagine it's quite a busy room and all that where the majority of punters men aged 60 and over. After this, the lads decide the only sensible thing to do was to get absolutely plastered and head into a nightclub, which isn't difficult given this is a university town.
14:56Crouchy's terrified that he'll bump into someone he knows, given it's not too far from where he's from. At one point, a group of students come up to the pug, point at him and start laughing. That's a bad one, isn't it? You with that? That's a bad and that. We're all sitting there thinking the same thing. Imagine if this was actually his girlfriend and a group of lads had just come up and done that, which is true, isn't it? It's horrendous for both. He's got to start swinging. Yeah, and you can't... I mean, what are you doing? Protecting a woman's honour on the first date? Anyway, this has now become a regular topic of...
15:42discussion within the group as the pug is approaching a two-year dry spell. Might have to get Georgie in this.
15:54Although he has gone on to say, I thought Chris might be the man to answer this given his extensive experience at Blackburn. should the pug drop down a few divisions again to find the net put in some extra training or is it time to finally hang up his boots for reference i've attached a cake we plan on producing after two years as all good friends would based on a sneaky photo of the date just for your viewing and yeah I won't hold it up but it's in the it's in the thingy sweet he's just playing darts and she's sat on her phone he's not had sex when he had on oh Jesus
16:49Ness is a great child isn't it with a leather jacket he's literally made this cake yeah to commemorate the two-year anniversary. I'll tell you what, by the way, if that's him, it could be fucking four years. There was this dry spell. Mm-hmm. Has he got leather trousers on? It is a cake, John. Oh, is it? Did you think I were him? I thought that was a photo from back at fun. It's a hell of a cake design, isn't it? They're not leather, them, John. They're icing. Oh, shit. It's just a bit of licorice, John. Has he got leather trousers on? I thought that was him. I thought that was her for. Whoever's made that cake is fucking incredible.
17:42It's unbelievable, isn't it? I've got a lot of time for that. Gwyn had that much effort for the two-year anniversary of not being able to seal the deal. And by the way, before people say we're being harsh, I've spoke about this regularly, about people not being truthful with how they look currently. And it goes both ways, like we've mentioned. Yeah. Look at that. Have you sent something else in? Oh, so this was the picture she sent on a profile. Well, this was the picture on a profile. Nah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's just made her... Messy bedroom. Yeah. Yeah. No good can come... Nothing good can come of that.
18:31Red flag straight away for me, because if you join a dating site, upload a picture, you at least move the sock that's on your wooden floor. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? That's just basic stuff. You've got sock, you've got extension lead. She's not even made her black mucky cow. It looks a little bit like a blow-up penis. The hair's gone out of it, doesn't it? Mm-hmm. Not good enough. His question is, should he lower his expectations? So are you thinking, like, just anything to get a shot off? Oh, well, maybe just to pick his confidence back up. But maybe his expectations are out the park. You know, it's a dose of reality, maybe.
19:19We shouldn't even be questioning this when we've got a team member who's in the exact same position. Why don't George come on and tell us? Are you thinking about lowering your standards, George? Yeah. Hear it from the horse's mouth.
19:37George, you'd have to start with a two's and three's, but then just get back in the game. George, come and join. Here he is, lad. Here he is, lad. That's why I'm doing it backstage, to be honest. So, Georgie, on this email we've just had, do you feel as though you need to lower your standards? No, I don't think so. Where would you say at the moment your standards are? Middle of the park, I'd say. Five sixes or six sevens? Yeah, six, five, six, seven. Oh. So you think you might need to start going two, three, four? No, no, no. So you said you keep chipping away, George. Keep knocking on doors, you get there eventually.
20:28You said you were catfish the other day, George. I mean, what were your expectations going in off the 4th ascent and where would you say we ended up? From a 7 to a 4. That's nearly a 50 % drop. Yeah. Yeah. It's a big drop that, George. Did you do a Ricky Gervais in the office? Oh, for fuck's sake. Yeah, when I walked in. In my head, not all. Internally. Yeah, internally. I mean, if her friends are watching this, George, she'll know exactly who it is because you're now fully visible. All to see. I hope she's a period. Getting cut from this. I hope my God she's a Patreon member that's one membership cancelled so did you just sit down George for the meal were it a meal or drinks drinks and what did she have a pint of Guinness or a pint of John Sniffs or something no it was Copperberg oh see lots of calories in them yeah sugar yeah did you not finger her out no what No, I didn't, John.
21:41No? Would you have if you'd have said, George, you've got to come into the Sabotard and finger me? We're there, George. This is a genuine question. Has it crossed your mind to get back in the saddle just to get one over the line? No. You're happy with the job? I always thought you're a man of integrity, George. you've always said that.
22:13He's not spent enough time in our company. Three weeks in America, I reckon if it had been six weeks, it'd have walloped her. You'd be brimming with confidence afterwards. Yeah. You think, Si? Yeah. See, I think it's the opposite way. If you fall into a habit of going against her, going for fours, you stick in that pattern. Stuck in a rut. I think, I think it's desperate calls. Well, you just keep wanking, George, innit? Quick trip to Norway. Exactly. For the benefit of Friday Club, I hope this carries on for another year, to be honest. But then we get him a kick. It'll get quite boring content.
22:56Any shags, George?
23:02I hope the next time George has sex lintercourses, He's 47 years old and he's in Thailand with a fella.
23:12You're on, mate. Cheers, boys. Thanks for going, George. Yeah, George, you're going to be a feature. Give us a speak pipe, George. Hey, lads. Just listened to last week's Friday Club, where the fella said about the carousel at the airport, well, I've got something else in the bin from the airport. The thing that gets me and fucking winds me up is when the gate gets announced and every person drops whatever they're doing and legs it to queue up for 20 minutes at the gate to then sit on the plane for an hour before they finish boarding. Everyone's got an assigned seat on the plane. You could rock up two minutes before boarding finishes, walk on the plane, get your seat.
23:54I've paid nine quid for a pint in the bar. I'm not necking it to go sit on the plane next to some fucking smelly bastard for an hour before we finish boarding. get it in the fucking bin lads straight in at number one for me this is 100 % in the bin and we've got two members of our four member squad yeah who are this exact dickhead no I'm 100 % Chris but the pair is you start getting edgy I think we need to move to the gate now another voice Chris another voice How many times I think we need to be able to the gate now It says go to gate Shut up How many times Have we gone to gate And in the final calling our names There's a line I won't queue, I'll never queue That's a line I wait till the queue side down C17 How many times have we nearly missed the fight How many times...
25:04Well, we've missed... We've missed a flight once and almost missed at least two more. Yeah, we didn't even make any departure lounge on that one. It's saying it's a 13-minute walk. We need to set up now. That's the one. Drink up. Drink up, boys. That's the one. I'd rather just get there, me, and get on. I won't queue. I'll wait till the queue's gone. You will queue. I've seen you in the queue plenty. Not the big queue. not the big queue we've got a seat we can see we can see the flipping gate why stand in a queue ten deep like the fella said what was his name Nathan we've got a seat and you always get through and there's a queue on the the thing going down there's another queue after the queue yeah I do like I like to get my bags in though if you last on why Where else are we?
26:02Then you're going up and down, such it, and then when you land, your bag's further back, so then you've got to stand there and wait for everybody behind you to get off so that you can go back and get your bag. There's always room, Chris. There's always room. No. Happy medium. I half expect it from Matty because it's a bit of a risk assessment. I'm sure he'll say that himself. But with you, I like to live on the edge a little bit. Rucksack in the queue, double strap.
26:31I do like to just be on a plane. I must admit. Could our seats 1 to 13 please hold the plane? Well, what is it? No matter. You get the little numbers, don't you? Like which section of the plane you're on. We've missed our section. This is section five and we're section three. Oh, shit.
26:56No, I will admit. When it comes to planes, I do just get a bit anxious and like to be on it. I mean, there's no question it's going in the bin, isn't it? Oh, fucking 100%. But don't get me wrong, a phone call en route to the terminal is probably a little bit too far. I didn't like that bit. Yeah. We still made it, though. The phone calls, yeah, the phone calls too much, but like this, I don't know. 200 people sat about on the chairs, you know, at your gate. Can people from section 1 to 13 please come now? Everyone jumps up. Oh, I'm section 12. Fuck off. I don't know. Let section 14 to 60, let them bastards get on.
27:46And then you just get on, mosey on, put your thing on, job done. It is actually funny watching you with Matty, though. stand up and as soon as it comes final call on television oh I've got my rucksack on let's go we need to go fuck off I like it even more I'm leaving you next time I like it even more when John kind of goes AWOL at this critical point of you's wanting to get marched to the gate you like caught the toilet or something Has anyone seen John?
28:30I've only ever missed one fight and that were ours. That's the only fight I've ever missed. Yeah, and that was because we've slept in. I reckon from... Sorry, we slept in? Yeah. I reckon from when the first final call comes up, I reckon you've got another pint in you, timing-wise. No. No. Yeah. Listen, being at the gate, that's fine and going last, but let's get to the gate. On the other speak pipe, I don't know if George will be able to find it, but it's a holiday one, and it's people wearing boxer shorts under the swimming trunks.
29:20Is that in the bin? any swimming shorts that I've ever worn have got lining in them lining yeah so there's no need I wear my pants under my shorts yeah well exactly you you get on plane fucking an hour and a half before it's fucking gonna lie we rest we rest our case but then I don't wear swimming shorts I just wear normal shorts who doesn't own swim shorts quick message gentlemen from our friends at Saley. Heroes. For you especially, John. Oh, certainly we're in America. Well, Saley, if you don't know, is the eSIM service app brought to you by the creators of NordVPN, which we love, don't we?
Read the full transcript
30:08Obviously, you know I'm not very technical. All you need to do is download the app to your phone, install an eSIM so you can use data abroad instead of getting them horrible, horrible roaming charges. we've all been stung with a hefty bill in the past, haven't we? Yes. Since this Silly, very affordable. Really good prices. I used it in Dubai and it was very, very affordable. It saves you time as well. You don't need to wait in line. You know, when you get to airport, foreign sims, when they're there with cardboard. Scrambling for Wi-Fi. Yeah. And it's compatible with iOS or Android devices and it offers plans in over 200 destinations.
30:47Download Saley in your app store and use the code COSH at checkout to get an exclusive 15 % off your first purchase. The details are in the podcast episode description box.
31:16is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18 plus. The best summer memories are made outside and L.L. Bean has the clothing and gear you need to make these memories. Their effortless styles are created for summers spent outside with family and friends. Like hand-sewn boat shoes, coastal cotton sweaters, rugged polos, and of course, the iconic Boat & tote, which has been made right gear in Maine since 1944. L.L. Bean. Be an outsider. Visit llbean.com to learn more.
31:56Right, I'm going in. Please keep this strictly private and don't use any names. Loving the Friday Club, lads, it's made me feel semi-normal again, as most of my mates are boring and basically think I'm a pervert. Listening to the stories on here makes me feel like, makes me feel less like Jim from American Pie. I need to start with a backstory to understand why I am like I am before the main event. Please keep this strictly anonymous, as only one of my mates knows this story. I can't tell my circle of mates, as they all have links to the family in the story. My obsession started at 14 years old, calling on my mate down the road, waiting for him to get his bike out the shed.
32:49He left me at the bottom of the stairs by his front door. Suddenly, his mum walked past drying her hair on the landing, completely naked. An easy out eight of ten, with an amazing body, however with a massive bush. Which me Me and my other mates named her Three Beards.
33:15This is when I found myself physically wanking my way into the puberty years. Every time I closed my eyes, I would be at the bottom of those stairs. It was the early 90s, so porn back then wasn't as accessible as it is now. And most of the time I had alone was spent in the lingerie section of the next catalogue. As this was the best we had in that day. let's just say my obsession for milfs started that day i agree though getting in the laundry the lingerie stuff in the in the next catalog was the best you could get back back back in that day we've all been there and all this became an obsession for the next few years when seizing the opportunity one day when my mate was on holiday with his family they left me a key to feed his two cats.
34:08I ventured into his mum's knicker drawer and pleasured myself over and over again with a variety of her sexy underwear.
34:20The day before they came home, I hit the jackpot. Being so obsessed with her knicker drawer, I forgot about the laundry bin. Where to my delight, I found a used pair of pussy stained knickers. I don't like that word. The P word. It smelt like heaven to a 14-year-old boy. Stained. I basically wanked myself into a coma that night. I spent so much time around their house that week. My parents decided to buy me a cat for Christmas because my excuse was that I was playing with the cats so much. Little to their knowledge, I was just playing with myself. I fucking hate cats.
35:11So here's the story. I lost my virginity rather late at the age of 20. A skinny lad at five foot eight with no confidence led to me being a late bloomer. I met a local punk rock girl a couple of years older than me, on MSN Messenger. And we used to chat long into the night. Ever get on the MSN? Oh, yeah. Yeah? No. The old days of dial-up internet, keeping my parents up all night every time it connected. Eventually, we met up. She was a 6 out of 10, very shy girl, great body, but hardly spoke on the first few dates. Then, we had the house to ourselves one night And we took each other's virginity.
36:00I was in love. The sex was amazing and non-stop. She was a nympho. The sex got rougher and rougher. And I was constantly having my chest and back clawed by her nails. It began to become somewhat of a concern for me. I thought I may have to invest in a stab vest at one point.
36:26Things started to take a turn when she asked me about having an open relationship This hurt me as a young lad, thinking I was never enough for her A few arguments later and we were on a rough part of our relationship I knew what I had to do Get rid of the psycho and move on Unfortunately though, I was having sex for the first time in my life never thinking I would ever have it again. Plus, parents were going for a rough point in their marriage so it felt I couldn't dump her at that point. So, one night, staying round her house I had to sleep in her brother's bed. In brackets, her brother was not there but trained in the army and her dad wouldn't let me anywhere near her room.
37:12So I got my head down in her brother's room for the night. her mum was really into horse riding and owned horses before they both died she had a horse rider's body tight and firm so I'm guessing you know where this is going although she had an amazing body she was in her early 50s and facial wise was pushing a 3 out of 10 with saggy eyelids and some early face wrinkles saggy eyelids? are we thinking like like these? that is I didn't really find her attractive at first but a few flirty comments over the previous months had made us always have a good laugh together so this night we all went to bed my girlfriend's dad was a postman so he went to work about 5ish and my girlfriend went to work early too as she worked at the local Tesco which left me alone in her brother's bed waking up to a humming noise coming from down the hallway and some heavy breathing.
38:19Worrying her mum was having some sort of stroke because of her age, I edged closer to the noise down the landing. Her parents' door was ajar. I popped my head in to see if she was okay. To my surprise, she was spread eagle on the bed, layered on a towel with a dildo sliding in and out of her, which I can only describe as the size of one of her dead horse's dicks. Fucking hell fire. She saw me and didn't stop. Only to then become more vigorous with this mammoth toy. I thought, fuck it. I'm dumping my... I'm dumping the nutter daughter soon anyway. Why not? I put my boxes down and stood at the end of the bed.
39:09wanking hard a bit of mutual masturbation I thought her massive bush reminded me of my mate's mum's my fantasy milf from six years earlier I focused on this and tried not to look at her face when I got closer her foot run up my chest and she demanded I suck her toes oof I haven't got a foot fetish but did what she requested her other foot rubbing my average-sized 20-year-old cock. It didn't take long before I jizzed all over her foot. I would like to say it stopped there, and that was the end of the story, but it got worse. She wanted to take control of what I now describe as the drill-to-do finisher-off.
40:01Does that make sense? I'm enjoying this. She wanted me to take control and pulled me in closer and I got to get a closer look of her amazing bush and began to think more of my mate's mum. As a young naive lad I didn't realise what the tower was for until the moment of the loudest groan I have ever heard. With her legs shaking a jet of fluid hit me in the eye blinding me. Yep she was a squirter The jet of fluid splashed into one of my eyes and sent me stumbling backwards where I knocked into a set of drawers Moments later, a massive smash on the floor and another scream from the mum However, this was one more of sorrow than the previous one Yes, I had only gone and knocked over an urn full of her dead horse's ashes all over the floor she shot up like a mad woman trying to get the ashes back in the broken urn i bet there'll water all over him or whatever it is a bit of gush all over him i left her crying on the floor shouting at me to get out i slid on my i slid my boxes back on which were on the door and glanced back and felt awful.
41:32What made it worse was that she had put her cum-covered foot into the dead horse's ashes which were now stuck to her foot. A sight I will never forget. I left in a hurry and no more was said. I dumped the daughter a few days later. The young punk rocker came round to my house and put a brick through my car window as a break-up present. My dad went mad about it. But I calmed him down, saying it's only a window and I'd pay for a new one. Little did he know that smashing my car window was probably calmer for smashing the urn. I'm now in my 40s and given up on my mill fantasy. Now, as I'm currently married with kids, although I'm on to gilfs.
42:19I joke with my mates. If I ever get divorced, I clean up on Twitter with my age filter being set at 60 to 80, which leaves me with a question. how old would you boys go if you were single? Up the fucking cosh. Keep the stories coming. That's one of my favourite ever emails, that beauty. What's going on there? Yeah. Yeah. It seems like ages ago he saw his mates, Mamet Bottom, at the stairs, doesn't it? I know. He set the scene, didn't he? Am I right in saying it's a no-brainer getting involved if he's not that bothered about her daughter? Yeah. It's bold, isn't it? I'm sorry. No, that could go either way, couldn't it?
43:00You know when you drop the boxes? Well, if she carries on when she's seen you. See, I think I'm the same as you here, Chrissie. I'm not standing at your bed. I'm jumping on bed. Yeah. I'm jumping on the bed.
43:23Yeah, I'm jumping on bed. That's it, I'm jumping on bed. Yeah, I'll be with a foot. Sucking a foot. Where's that come from? Would you know? Would you know you're in the prime position? I'd rather not. Get your foot out of my face and blast me in the ball.
43:47She's a mature in the air. Wanking on the foot? I mean do you know that that squirting game I can imagine it's a nightmare you know for changing seats because it's one of my worst chores you know changing bedding and putting bedding back on do you know when the squirty girties I imagine you've got to go with preparation you know it's like you're going for a picnic every time just just Chuck a towel down. Yeah, I get you. I wonder if that is a thing then, that he's always had a thing for milfs and now he's of a certain age that he's moved on to the next bracket. Yeah, because then you just, yeah.
44:37You know, whether it increases, you always like that 10 to 20 year age gap. See, if you're 20, you can still find a 40 year old attractive. But if you're 40, are you finding a 60-year-old attractive? 60-plus? If it's Ellen Mirren, yeah. But then you've obviously got a ponchoant for an older lady, but then the... A what? A ponchoant? There must be another word you could have used. You struggled getting it out. We've known each other for eight and a bit years And you've never used the word ponchoant What the fuck is that? You stuttered getting it out But you thought The lads are like this I'm good with it If I knew I had to spell it I'd google it Ponchoant Is it a thing?
45:34It's a thing Yeah, if you've got a thing If you've got another thing for older ladies Oh man Ponchoant's done me A punch one
45:46That's definitely been used before Surely A punch one Yeah Oh dear But if you've got a thing for older ladies Then When you are the same age as These older ladies that you were once into Surely it has to increase I know Oh fucking hell I forgot to tell you So Coco Bongos Other than here this is on Saturday gets to reception like you know to get picked up by the coach there's a police wagon outside a bit like what you think could be on a farm you know like a a cab and then like a bat where you put sheep on a flat back yeah seven fucking Mexicans get in this police wagon that's shipped off so speaking to a guy next day right pool uh from stockton that's up near eucarist in it yeah middlesbrough yeah yeah stockton he says did you see that last night like no why what's going on it were like fucking okay corral apparently right pool mexicans and americans having a fucking tear up Jesus tear up tear up I'm fucking all abusive so we've missed it furious we've missed it like but yeah apparently it was like fucking okay corral and they've got they've got shipped off on police wagon I wouldn't mess with them Mexicans like well I don't know I don't know how bad it got but apparently some woman got cut like fucking out with big bowser getting involved if he was there and I've been like Michael Jackson moonwalking as far away as fucking possible this episode is brought to you by Google Chrome you think you know a browser but Gemini and Chrome that's new it can help you with practically anything on the web like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50 page restoration block or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks Gemini and Chrome is here for it.
48:05Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required. Compatibility and availability varies 18+. Honey, did you invite the Minions over? Well, you know how we talked about getting Wi-Fi from Xfinity? Yeah. I ordered it this morning. It was online in minutes. Then, they showed up. So they just came over to use the Wi-Fi? For what?
48:29Better not to know. Get online in minutes with same-day Wi-Fi from Xfinity. Plus, lock in your price for five years and see Minions and Monsters only in theatres. Xfinity, imagine that. Restrictions apply, not available in all areas. Learn more at xfinity.com slash same-day Wi-Fi. Well, there's another dating app horror show here. All right, lads, blah, blah, blah. The story last week of the lad meeting a bigger girl on a dating app reminded me of a story my maid had due in our travelling days. Please keep this anonymous as he is now happily married. He was travelling Australia and logged on to an app called Plenty of Fish, where he got chatting to a girl.
49:06They were flirting away, and eventually she invited him over to hers for some filthy sex. He had... Do you know when you say filthy sex? What comes into your mind? Sweat. What, are you thinking lacrosse and chains? I'm thinking botty gear. Botties? but that filthy sex i'm thinking that's like up up gary stuff oh no filthy sex i don't think it's it's bottom stuff well what's what's filthy sex what's different like what's set the sex and there's what's filthy sex fill uh to me aggressive on the front foot kind of sex so that's just aggressive on the front foot sex that's not filthy is it but like grabbing and to me anyway I don't like the body stuff you do but if something said to me do you want to come and have filthy sex I'm thinking that's I'm backdooring yeah probably it's a different thing as a set you want to come and have aggressive sex I think she's taking charge if she puts that on your toes.
50:31Filthy. Yeah. Then again, she could be very submissive, I suppose. Do what you want. One of them. Like sex is sex, isn't it? So whatever position you're in, it's not that much filthier than another position, is it? You still do the same thing.
50:58is reverse cowgirl filthier than cowgirl I think it's more extracurricular stuff yeah I don't think it's just the positions so is that body stuff then I think so and I think it's forcing your mickey down the throat and that oh god yeah dang me that kind of gear Oh. I'm not into that.
51:31Yeah, that has got me. Forcing your Mickey down a row. That's disgusting.
51:48What, you don't even ask? She's laughing back, stick it off. Do you not even ask? Like, just... Oh! Spit for it, yawn.
52:04She's only gonna sneeze. She's only got a bit of hair fever. I'm a bit of this. Fucking get that idea, bastard.
52:18Alright, here we go.
52:23Oh, I might have to mute. I might have to mute. Right, I'll try and carry on. He had been partying quite hard, and as what Brownie puts it, was hot and horny. Wait, I'll read that again. Start again. I can't remember what I'm doing. There's line work. He's, um... Yeah, he's travelling.
52:58I have got a good technique for you if you want to try it later Oh, I've seen you micking Oh, fucking hell Right, shall I just carry on from here? He had been partying quite hard and was, as Brownlee puts it hot and horny her photo seemed alright so he decided to take the hour bus ride to hers he said she looked a 7 on photos but as he arrived at the bus stop there she was a solid 3 not fat but looked like a smack head by the way Janet's upstairs here she's not going to she's not going to be happy with my vocabulary
53:50It'll come as no surprise to her, I can tell you. He contemplated staying on the bus and driving past, but thought, fuck it, these balls need draining. Oh, God. They go inside and get chatting. It's quite clear she wants one thing, and it's straight to the bedroom. They start kissing, and she asks him to go down on her, which he replies, no chance I'm sticking my head in there on the first meet. this is where it all goes south so they are both naked on the bed the lady in question begins to cry she then begins to hit him in the face while screaming me dad's just died me dad's just died fucking lick me out you cunt
54:44in a thick Aussie accent Accent. Not knowing what to do? My friend panics, jumps up, grabs his clothes and belts it out the house and down the street bollock naked, with her chasing him, screaming to come back. Luckily he made it to safety to another bus stop and got changed, then hopped on a bus back home, blocked her and never heard from her again. Dating apps can be crazy, he says, keep up the great work. I mean bless us you were mourning but sounds like she were yawning and all well we just stuck your Mickey down her throat then
55:28we've had something similar to that before haven't we do you know what do you know what 20 20 I'm saying right we'll get a wish then mm-hmm don't get a lesson I'll swear to that for you and your dad thing is he's been he's been honest with her like so I'm not going down there first first knockings earlier on I mean I think I think her initial
56:01I mean he said she looked like a smack head mm-hmm he's already got doubts had him serious doubts Do you know his point about on the first date? Is there exceptions on that? Or do you think that's his rule across the board? No, I think it's pristine. If she's pristine, I don't think he would have had a second thought, would he? I'd like to think not. I think that would just be his ticket out of there. See, I'd see it as charity work me, helping her out for morning. Or would you feel sorry for her? Well, go on then. Yeah. Maybe even take her to sink and wesh it your scent. You know, it's been done properly.
56:47Aggressive. Yeah. She's smacking him in the face, John. My dad's died. My dad's died. Lick me pussy. Yeah. When you put it like that. But if you say, as soon as she asks, say, oh, I'll tell you what, I'll get a wesh. I don't think, if she's saying, lick me pussy, me dad's died. I don't think, if you say, I'll tell you what then, let's just go and get a wash. I don't think that's going to put her off, is it? You can ask her to go and wash it. Do you mind just washing her? Yeah, of course you can. Just wash it first. Just give it a rinse. Bit Barry. Or maybe even... Like asking them changing gloves where they make a subway.
57:35Maybe even get it sour with you. I say, oh, that bus journey was sweaty, so we didn't shower. Yeah, that's the one. There's a speed pipe here and I think you might be CC'd in it. Me? I'm just catching up on Friday Club from a couple of weeks ago and we were talking about F1 t-shirts and people who wear them are pretty much fucking nonces. So I've got a question. Where do we draw the line? what about people who wear band t-shirts because i think chris bald chris might be a bit of a fan of a band t-shirt from what i can see um so yeah have we got to be part of the band to wear a band t-shirt where do we draw the line fellas and uh if you do play this then there's no doubt that my a fellow will be listening to this.
58:30So, bye, Sam. You all right? Bye, Sam. You all right, Sam? You all right, Sam? I'm on board with this. I'll tell you what I think it is. Right, and obviously by no, no means am I a fashion guru. I think it's just lazy. It's lazy dressing. theater yeah so like I went to watch Metallica sound I was just wearing Metallica like it's just lazy dressing for me do you know but you don't think like following fashion is lazy like you can't you don't know what you don't know what you like you just wear what you're told for like like whatever you've got to think about whatever you whatever's fashionable yeah I think wearing a band T-shirt is lazy.
59:32Right. Wearing a, I don't know, a T-shirt from a restaurant, it's just like, oh, lazy. I just put my T-shirt on with them shorts or that jeans. Lazy, isn't it? Are you putting them in the same bracket as Formula One? I think I am. because you went to you went to Milan and you watched Bon Jovi right fantastic I hope you had a really really good time I don't give a fuck if you went I'm not bothered if you went to to Milan to watch Bon Jovi surely it can't get any lazier than only wearing stuff that people send you for free like whether it whether it looks shit or not I'll put it on anyway I'm not saying I'm not a lazy dresser Like I said, I'm not at the height of fashion.
1:00:31But, oh, did you go and see them? Yeah, sound. Wank for me. Yeah, I've got a few band t-shirts, haven't you? Yeah, I've got a few. So I think if we could condense that speak pipe into, are we putting them in the same bracket as F1 merch? for me it's a yes so for me I think I am as well yes me as well well I'm outnumbered aren't I here I just yeah I'm trying to think only because I'm trying to think what's going to be a left role I judge everything on its merit and would I go you've got a lottery winners one I don't like the lottery winners but a band that I liked would I buy the t-shirt absolutely not no You go to a concert, I don't even look at the merch stand.
1:01:27So what's your t-shirt? Mine? Yeah, your vest. Just a vest. L.A. Just a vest from River Island. I needed a couple of vests. I went to a couple of vests. What does it actually say? L.A. what? It says, Tracy Chapman, 1994. L.A. what? I don't fucking know. I just needed a fucking vest. What does it say? Honestly, I couldn't be able to tell you. It says in address, 7421 Coral Breeze Drive, LACA 90210. That's what it says. Yeah, I think it might. there will be people out there in your boat Chris who wear band t-shirts but I think I think there's I think there's I think there's a lot like
1:02:31but for me they're in there with the X one like it's as if it's as if you're like oh I wake up on a Tuesday morning oh I'm just picking what to wear for what day oh oh fucking hell it's there me fucking Ed Sheeran t-shirt Oh, I went to watch Ed Sheeran 19 months ago, didn't I? It was fantastic. Oh, my God, it's all coming back. All coming back. It's all coming back to me now. Like, fucking surely I can remember, you dicks. It's just a T-shirt, John. It doesn't matter what's on it, does it? It's just a T-shirt. Like, yours says LA Resort. Yeah, it might not be a good vest, but I'm neither of the vest, can I get it?
1:03:12It's doing the same job, innit? It's doing the same job. It's just a T-shirt. Oh.
1:03:19it's not the same job because when you put that Ed Sheeran or Oasis t-shirt on it's like a symbol yeah because I'm not I wouldn't wear an Ed Sheeran t-shirt I don't think the artist is the main thing we're talking about Chris it's like I don't know Brussels 17th of July Dortmund 19th of July Paris 24th of July right sound they did a tour right brilliant that's what bands do for me anyway yeah weighing it all up it's in the bin for me but yeah it's a loose right well I'm not putting them in the bin it's a loose one it's a loose one for me it's like a I've ridden tell you what's even worse even worse than band t-shirts restaurant t-shirts that is that is the filth of all filth Oh, I went to Copperface Jack.
1:04:20Yeah, yeah. I went to McDonald's. I got a big red T-shirt with a big M on. Didn't you get that one from the services, Buc-ee's? Yeah, I got a T-shirt from the services. That's the worst of the lot. Actually, two. From the service station. I wore my Buc-ee's one of the day, actually. Oh, yeah. Oh, they own. And I got a chat to someone at Tesco about it. He said, oh, I've been Buc-ee's. So is that why you wear it? To draw attention to yourself? Yeah. It goes back to what you were saying before. Conversation starter. You were a lovely fella. And next time I see him, I'll say, are you all right? And we'll get chatting again.
1:04:59So basically, people who wear them band T-shirts and restaurant T-shirts just want more friends, don't they? Exactly. They want conversation with people. Go on, George. Give us one more. Give us one more.
1:05:16all right boys here's a controversial one for you because most people right now will be absolutely cursing me i'll go in fucking hate darts it is absolutely shite luke littler is very good at what he does he's all over fucking tv he's made himself a lot of fucking money you know he's brilliant in his field his field is throwing a small metal spear at a fucking number board in front of a load of pistol people now i've got mates who go to alipali i've got mates who go all over to watch darts absolutely fine but darts crowd is like fucking beer keller if you've been in one of them you know people dressed up as thunderbirds or a chicken dancing on the fucking table down in pictures of warm carlin and warm cars buying jello shots just go to beer keller but the amount of airtime darts gets as a sport is ridiculous it is not a fucking sport if that is a sport then i need to take a professional mousetrap or professional monopoly because that's much of a fucking sport than darts anyway i know that's going to be a bit controversial for most people so uh opposite of bonjour he can get in the bin yeah do you know but do you know what I like about these speak pipes it's opinions isn't it it is controversial I think that's a bit shit to be honest oh right do you know when he's just said it's not a sport it's not a sport I'm not saying it's a sport I'm just saying no he no he said it's not a sport Right.
1:07:06So what is a sport? It's two people competing against other people for a final goal. That, for me, is a sport. I'm Formula One. I'll tell you what, Josh. That's it. Sport is a competitive physical activity requiring skill and rules, such as football, tennis and running. Not my words. Right. So it might seem like not a physical sport, but concentration-wise, and you've got to walk four yards to pick your darts up and five yards back, it's a big loop. it's a big loop is it a skill thing is it does it require of course it's a skill because I I can't I can't do that I'm not skilled enough to do that I mean I'm not questioning whether it's a sport or not but if you were I'm not going to sit at home watching darts but if you were at Ali Pali you'd be up you'd be throwing pints you'd be I've just had some you'd have your bird Yeah, with your Kasabian T-shirt on, you brick.
1:08:30But he's slaughtered the full thing, hasn't he? He's slaughtered the crowd. He's slaughtered the... Yeah, he can get it. But I get where he comes from. Do you think a lot of people that go to darts, it's just an excuse to go to that event and dress up as a chicken and have loads of pints and stand up to it? And probably don't even like darts. Do you think the darts... And it's a bit like the cricket. in a way. I'll go cricket on a Friday. It's just to see my mates and have a few drinks. Do I watch much of cricket? Yeah, so it's an excuse for people. Yeah, which is fine. Yeah, no problem with that.
1:09:09He has. But he's slaughtered the game. He's slaughtered people going to watch. He's slaughtered the drinking culture. He's slaughtered... So, yeah, he's... I didn't get his name. What's his name? Barry. Yeah, we'll call him Barry. now for me for me darts is a sport for me right Phil Taylor Phil Taylor should have won the personality year 16 times world champion have you got an example of something similar to darts that's not classed as a sport is chess a sport no let me consult my friend G-Rock Of course it's a sport because it's two people competing against each other. Of course it's a sport.
1:09:58That is the terminology of sport. Ready? Yes. Chess is officially recognised as sport by the International Olympic Committee. Tiddlywinks? Thumbwares? Yeah, for me, it is. Thumbwares? Yeah. If you're competing against somebody else, it's a sport, isn't it? Yes. Tiddlywinks is played as a competitive sport with organised national and world championships. So then it all just comes down to the marketing of that sport, doesn't it? So somebody wins 16 years Tiddlywink champion or Thumbwar champion, should he then be held in the hat in the same regard as Phil Taylor? But it's just not marketed as well or Luke Littler.
1:10:47So are you putting it in the bin, Chris? How am I putting it in the bin? Yeah. darts you're not no I'm not that arsed about it go and bin for me alright do you know where Nate bin for me I think I think it's one of the most entertaining things to watch I do like even though it's very good I do like a game of it well since we started recording George is on another hour and a half dry spell bless him so that's 19 months that's That's 19 months, four days and 17 hours, bless him. If there's any single female coshies out there. Yeah, or, in fact, George, get down to, get down to Bucket, whatever it were, where swingers are.
1:11:38I'm sure they'll let you have a ride out, George. Supposed to be a bit of swinging over there, you know. Were you? John. Oh, yeah. Resorts and stuff. To be fair, I've seen a few who might be swinging. Pineapples. That one about the few I think, oh, I bet he's got a decent length on him.
1:12:05Right, gents. Well, enjoy the rest of your trip, John. Yeah. Well, next time, I'll be at home. You'll be in the medical with you. Yes. so i'll tell you best we're on a boat tomorrow
1:12:23no is it um a booze cruise it's somewhat along them lines i believe uh yeah i mean i'm snorkeling and all oh lovely are you right are you gonna have a bit of a diddle a tea time diddle. I'll have to see you watch your fancies. KT! I've got a second here.
1:12:52Right, we'll see you next week. The link for the spin pants in the description. And have a good and good way. If this is worked I'll fucking juggle sand. Right, I'll see you in a bit. Right, bye bye. Good night, God bless. Bye.
1:13:14Starting a business can seem like a daunting task, unless you have a partner like Shopify. They have the tools you need to start and grow your business. From designing a website, to marketing, to selling and beyond, Shopify can help with everything you need. There's a reason millions of companies like Mattel, Heinz, and Allbirds continue to trust and use them. With Shopify on your side, turn your big business idea into... Sign up for your$1 per month trial at shopify.com slash special offer.
From the publisher
With the big man being on his honeymoon we are running things remotely this week. Talking catfishing, towels in the bedroom and once again Baldy’s clothing going in the bin.
Download SAILY in your app store and use our code COSH at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details, go to https://saily.com/cosh
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
