Brandi Carlile helps us say goodbye to Bill Kurtis!

11:13Luke Burbank:Literally. Literally, but they came up with another solution.

11:17Paula Poundstone:Oh boy, you got any hints for me?

11:19Luke Burbank:I mean, presumably you could sit there and watch the movie the whole time.

11:23Paula Poundstone:Oh my God, the film shows in the bathroom?

11:28Luke Burbank:Yes. Oh, that's awful. There are TV monitors in the floor. Smart. In front of every toilet so you can watch the movie while you're using the toilet and not miss anything. Wow, yeah. I remember when I watched Oppenheimer, I needed a break because I thought it was too intense. And it would have been horrible if I went to go take a break in the bathroom. And it was still there.

11:53Paula Poundstone:And it followed you to your car. Everywhere you go, Oppenheimer is playing. Yeah. No, that's abusive.

12:01Negin Farsad:That's not a good relationship with Oppenheimer. Yeah. When I walk into the bathroom, I say, I have become death. Eater of yours.

12:13Luke Burbank:Coming up, what if our Bluff the Listener game was actually called Blurf the Listener? Call 1-888-Wayt-Wayt-to-Player. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

12:26Luke Burbank:This message comes from the Arbor Day Foundation, planting trees with intention and scale to support a greener future. For more than 50 years, the Arbor Day Foundation has connected local experts with the support they need from passionate people and companies who care to plant trees in communities and forests across the world. They use data and mapping to ensure their focusing efforts in high-priority areas where trees will make the most impact, like places affected by natural disasters. Disaster recovery work involving tree planting can take years to do right. In the two decades after Hurricane Katrina, the Arbor Day Foundation has planted hundreds of thousands of trees in response, And the work continues to this day as the Foundation is working with partners on the ground in New Orleans' Lower Ninth Ward to help rebuild a greener community through trees.

13:14Luke Burbank:Most recently, they've brought that same spirit to Los Angeles, planting at several sites throughout the city impacted by the Eaton Fire. Learn more and see how you can support their work at arborday.org slash NPR. This message comes from Whole Foods Market. Save now during the Summer Splash event at Whole Foods Market. Find great everyday prices on 365 brand ground beef for the grill and ice cream for dessert. Look for yellow sale signs on ready-to-cook beef or chicken kebabs, too. Level up with savory marinades, spices, and rubs. And complete your cookout with cherry pie and new balsamic chicken salad from the prepared foods counter.

13:52Get Summer Splash savings now at Whole Foods Market. This message comes from Travel Nevada. Sand dunes. Old saloons. High noons. Pioneer trails. and cowboy tales. Snooze emails. Get a little out there. Plan your trip at www.travelnevada.com. This message comes from BetterHelp. May is Mental Health Awareness Month, a reminder that you don't have to do this life alone. From loneliness to anxiety to financial stress, right now people everywhere are struggling. But having a licensed therapist with you by video, phone, or chat can make a difference. And BetterHelp makes it easy. Sign up now and get 10 % off at betterhelp.com slash NPR.

14:38That's betterhelp.com slash NPR.

14:46Negin Farsad:From NPR and WBEC Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Paula Poundstone, Nageen Farsad, and Luke Burbank. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sagal.

15:07Luke Burbank:Thank you, Bill. Thank you so much. Right now it is time for the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me Bluff, the listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT-WAIT if you would like to play our games on the air. Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, this is Rhonda Grass calling from McCook, Nebraska. McCook, Nebraska. Where is that exactly?

15:26Paula Poundstone:We are smack dab between Denver and Omaha and home to Senator George Norris.

15:32Luke Burbank:Oh, Senator George Norris?

15:35Paula Poundstone:Yeah, you got to go back a ways to, you know, electricity. Oh, I'm sorry. And now we're to broadband.

15:41Luke Burbank:The Senator George Norris. Now I know. Yes. Well, Rhonda, welcome to the show. You're going to play the game in which you have to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what's Rhonda's topic? Just one letter. one letter can make a big difference consider the priest who told the congregation that all singers go to hell this week we heard a story of something off just by one letter and the consequences were remarkable our panelists are going to tell you about it pick the one who's telling the truth and you'll win our prize the wait waiter of your choice on your voicemail ready to play i am first let's hear from nagin farsad dr mariano cohen is a well-respected urologist in Argentina who was invited to speak on a local radio station.

16:26He was probably flattered that his vast knowledge of urology was going to be useful on a more public-facing scale. It's about time that the study of the testes, prostate, vast deference, and yes, the seminal vesicles, be taken as a serious matter of public health and not as an uncomfortable joke made by dirtbag comedians on silly quiz shows. But when the urologist went live on the airwaves, the first question he got was, where did he study to become a ufologist? As in someone who studies UFOs. Quote, I'm a urologist, not a ufologist, he said, as all the genitals he studied metaphorically shrank.

17:13in the end urologists are still the one doctor no one wants to see but they're a pretty decent stand-in when it comes to explaining inexplicable orbs with strange behaviors

17:26Luke Burbank:urologist invited on to a radio show because they thought he was a ufologist your next alphabet account

17:35Negin Farsad:comes from luke burbank according to a story this week in the hill about six months ago ben Forstag was at his desk as regional director of the FBA, the Farmington Bratwurst Association, a Michigan-based lobbying group representing the case-meets industry, when he got an email from Cash Patel ordering him to look into a series of bank robberies in the area. Why, though, would the FBI director reach out to him? Well, thanks to a typo on his LinkedIn page, his name came up when Director Patel googled Michigan Regional Director of the FBI. Patel was actually emailing a guy whose real expertise was how spicy is too spicy when we're talking kielbasa.

18:19Negin Farsad:The even more amazing part, Forsteg nabbed the suspect. With no legal authorization, he staked out the one bank in town that hadn't been robbed yet, and sure enough, he caught the bandit when he showed up, something he said he saw in a Matt Damon movie.

18:37Luke Burbank:Someone listing his job as with the FBI instead of the FBA ends up catching a criminal. Your last story of someone playing loose with the letters comes from Paula Poundstone.

18:51Paula Poundstone:Tech Tech, who Wired Magazine has put in the top slot of their Who to Watch in Tech List, recently held their Spring Fling employee recognition luncheon at the Southport Hyatt in Boston. The round tables were festooned with bouquets of flowers. The event featured an improv teacher who led the attendees in some hilarious group storytelling, but there was something missing. The lunch. In fact, the crowd grew a little restless, digging through their bags for power bars and candy by the last speaker, who shook his head slowly and moaned in response to each disturbance during his somewhat out-of-place testimonial about the challenges of his life as a very tall man, his struggles with depression, and the difficulties of finding work as a butler in the current economic climate.

19:39Paula Poundstone:Of course, CEO Watson threatened never again to use Let's Have an Affair, her go-to party planners, until they showed her a copy of the email asking for the event to include Lurch.

19:54Paula Poundstone:Lurch was the butler from the Adams family.

20:01Luke Burbank:So one of these single letter typos made it into the news this week. Was it from Nigeen Farsad, a urologist who got invited to talk about ETs and UFOs from Luke Burbank, somebody who was a regional director for the FBA, being mistaken for someone from the FBI, or was it from Paula Poundstone, a corporate event that went awry because they ended up with this visit from Lurch, the butler from the Adams family, rather than a delicious lunch?

20:37Paula Poundstone:Well, I love the Lurch idea, and I believe the FAI. I'm going with number one.

20:42Luke Burbank:You're going to go with Nagin's story of the urologist mistaken for a ufologist. Well, to bring you the correct answer, we spoke to someone familiar with the real story.

20:51Paula Poundstone:You log on to a call to think you're going to be asked about your medical expertise, and then someone's like, do you believe in aliens? And you're like, how is this relevant?

20:57Luke Burbank:Yeah. How is it relevant? That was Dr. Reena Malik, a urologist, explaining the mix-up in this week's news. Congratulations, Rhonda. You got it right. Thank you. Thank you.

21:14Luke Burbank:And now the game where people who have won a lot try to win one more thing. It's called Not My Job. Brandi Carlile says that from an early age, she knew she was going to make it as a musician, and she was right. She has won 11 Grammy Awards and two Emmys. She has an Oscar nomination for a song she wrote for her childhood idol, Elton John. Her new album is called Returning to Myself, and she joins us now. Brandi Carlile, welcome to Wait Wait Don't Tell Me.

21:49Luke Burbank:Let's start with this Elton John thing. I was reading your memoir, or rather listening to you read it, which was pretty great, and you write that you were such an Elton John fan as a pretty young girl. You actually dressed like him in a singing competition?

22:04Paula Poundstone:Oh yeah, many singing competitions, and also Halloween, and I went to school with the homemade Elton John jewelry. I mean, I was a massive Elton John fan as a teenager.

22:14Luke Burbank:Right. So, and how much did you stand out amongst your peers being, you know, when they'd come in doing whatever they were doing. In Maple Valley. Yeah. Washington. This is rural Washington, right? Your mother got you this white suit that she bedazzled and you had big fake glasses. What did they think of you?

22:30Paula Poundstone:Well, it was 1995. So it wasn't exactly the height of teen pop idol fame that Elton John experienced in the 70s. So it was like they were all discovering Elton John through me until the Lion King. And then they all understood my obsession.

22:43Luke Burbank:Really? They all realized you were a prophet before your time. So later on, you not only met Elton John, but collaborated with him and became very close friends. How early in your relationship did you tell him about this?

22:57Paula Poundstone:Like immediately, I got right in there. Really?

23:00Luke Burbank:Hello, my name is Brent.

23:01Paula Poundstone:You don't lie about that kind of thing. You just have to get it right out in the open, you know? And I think when you're Elton John, you can't decide to choose friends based on who's a fan and knows your music. It's like he'd have no friends at all if he did that well.

23:13Luke Burbank:Granted, if you're an international superstar of that duration, yes, everybody's going to be your fan. Not everybody is going to dress up as you as a 12-year-old girl.

23:24Paula Poundstone:It's a little tomato.

23:26Luke Burbank:One of the things we're seeing about you is you meet Elton John, you become close friends. You meet Joni Mitchell, you become collaborators.

23:33Paula Poundstone:Hi, Brandy. yeah

23:40have you

23:42Luke Burbank:have you ever have you ever felt shy about reaching up to any of your idols

23:46Paula Poundstone:no I'm not very shy at all in fact I'm married to a British woman and she just she's in constant state of cringe because I will walk straight up to new people or people I admire and I will just get right in there with a hug and I just I have no life is too short to not to not be friends and to get close with people you

24:07Luke Burbank:Have you have you ever been rebuffed? Yes, oh all the time really can you dish on somebody who wasn't nice to you?

24:17Paula Poundstone:No, I can't I can't get specifics But I will say that I've had moments even with my closest friends where they've been like, oh piss off Brandy I didn't recognize you right away

24:31Luke Burbank:I was fascinated to hear the details of your background. You grew up, as I said, in rural Washington state. You've written and talked about how poor your family was growing up. In fact, unless I got this wrong, sometimes the family would eat only if your father shot an elk or deer from your window?

24:51Paula Poundstone:I mean, I wouldn't say that we would only eat if we shot an elk or deer, but there were definitely a few elk and deer shot from the window. And from the window part, I mean, we're just sitting around the house and somebody says,

25:04Luke Burbank:it's a reverse drive-through. Yeah, kind of. I don't understand why we can take the screen off. Yeah, true. It's like, well, somebody says, so what's for dinner? And your dad says, well, let's find out. And he goes to the window. You also write about how your father more or less treated you just the same as he treated your brother, who was very close in age. None of that girly stuff for you. In fact, and I loved this story, he drove you to go have a fight with a bully?

25:32Paula Poundstone:Yeah, he did. He drove me to go have a, you know, you don't miss, it was in the 80s, you don't miss your fist fight appointments if you make them.

25:41Luke Burbank:Right. So I'm just, again, just, I mean, I guess applaud it to you for having the courage, applaud it to your father for supporting you in your goals. But I'm just curious as to how that went down. Like, you see your dad, and you say, Dad, there's this kid who's been bothering me, and I challenged him to a fight, and we agreed to meet down by the lake at two. Can you give me a ride? Is that what happened? That's exactly what happened. Really? That's exactly what happened. And your father said, okay.

26:08Paula Poundstone:Yeah, and he drove me to the lake, and he dropped me off, and then he left. Left, left.

26:14Luke Burbank:Wait a minute. So he drives you to have a fight with a boy. Wait a minute. I'm remembering in detail. Two boys. Yeah, yeah. And he drops you off. and he just leaves?

26:24Paula Poundstone:He left, yeah. I didn't see him until I went back home at dark. And me and the boys, we did get into a scuffle and one of them fell on the lake and we wound up playing the game of baseball at the baseball diamond all together. Who got the most points? I got the most points

26:42Luke Burbank:in the first fight, but I didn't feel around baseball. So, as I indicated, you had an extraordinary amount of confidence in your career as a musician. You dropped out of high school. You went up to Seattle. You did make it, to put it mildly. I think we had the total of 12 Grammys to date. Two Emmys, one Oscar nomination. 11. 11, excuse me. We'll keep our fingers crossed for this year. All right, fingers crossed. I have to ask, that's a lot of Grammys, 11. Where do you keep them?

27:11Paula Poundstone:I keep them all on top of my piano that I've had since I was 18. It's a 1900 upright old granny piano all that. I write tons of my songs on and the whole top of it's just covered in Grammys and Christmas lights.

27:24Luke Burbank:Wow. That's really cool. Thank you. It's enough, you know, it occurs to me, you have enough of them, you could do like a whole dinner party and everybody gets one at their place setting, like holding the napkin or something.

27:36Paula Poundstone:Well, I definitely don't hide them when people come over.

27:39Luke Burbank:Oh, sure. Well, Brandy Carlisle, it is an absolute delight to talk to you, but we have asked you here to play a game, and since your latest album is called Returning to Myself, we've asked you here to play a game that we're going to call... Returning to the store. Because when you think about it, returning to yourself is pretty easy. For example, you don't need a receipt. So, returning to the store, though, is a different thing. We're going to ask you three questions about people returning things to the store where they bought it. Get two out of three right. You'll win our prize for one of our listeners, the voice of anyone they might choose for their voicemail.

28:16Luke Burbank:You ready to play? Yes, sir. All right. Bill, who is the great Brandi Carlile playing for?

28:20Negin Farsad:Jennifer Coggins of Richmond, Virginia. All right.

28:24Luke Burbank:Here we go. Here's your first question. In 2018, a man in New Jersey was sent back to the grocery store by his wife to return a$5 bottle of orange juice because she thought it was too expensive. His wife, it turns out, turned out to be very wise. Why? A, while he was at the store returning it, a plane crashed into his empty house. B, the next person who bought that orange juice found a live scorpion inside. Or C, he spent the five bucks he got back on a lottery ticket that won him$315 million.

29:01Paula Poundstone:This feels like C to me.

29:03Luke Burbank:It is C, Randy. Oh my God. Oh my God. And we presume after he won$315 million in the lottery, his wife let him buy as much expensive orange juice as he wanted. Meanwhile, I get in trouble when I spend the grocery money on the lotto. I said, fine. Just got to win, baby. All right. That was very good. Here's your next question. Amazon promises easy returns. But one Amazon customer who tried several times to return an item got so frustrated that she did what? A, as vengeance, she bought a piano on Amazon and instantly returned that so Amazon would have to pay for the return shipping. B, she went to Amazon's shareholder meeting and tried to return the item directly to Jeff Bezos.

29:51Luke Burbank:Or C, with a friend, she embarked on an epic quest to cast the package into the fires of Mount Doom.

30:00Paula Poundstone:Well, I really want this to be B, so I'm going to go B. That's exactly what happened.

30:05Luke Burbank:She turned out she was an Amazon shareholder. So she got to go to the shareholders meeting. She stood up and said, Mr. Bezos, I have this package. You won't take it as a return. I want to give it to you. Bezos was very gracious about it. He apologized. He asked if anybody else there had anything they needed to return. It was pretty cool. However, you can still hate him. All right. Here's your last question, Brandi. You're doing as well with this as you seem to do with everything. Here's your last question. Costco, famous for their incredibly generous return policy. In fact, Costco somewhere in the country once accepted a return of which of these?

30:44Luke Burbank:A, the bones of the rotisserie chicken a man had just eaten in the food court, B, a dead Christmas tree in the first week of January, or C, everything a particular guy had ever bought from Costco?

31:02Paula Poundstone:I'm going with the dead Christmas tree.

31:04Luke Burbank:Well, you're right, but all of them were true.

31:07Paula Poundstone:Wow!

31:09Luke Burbank:Costco will take almost anything back if you bought it at Costco. That last guy, everything he'd ever bought, he pulled up with a U-Haul. He unloaded all this merchandise he had bought over the years. He said, well, I'm moving. And I figured instead of putting this in a moving van, I'll just return it to you, take the money, and buy it new when I get to my new home. Bill, how did Brandi Carlisle do in our case?

31:31Negin Farsad:Perfect score. She did three in a row.

31:34Luke Burbank:Wow, that's impressive. A lot of points. Amazing. Brandi Carlisle is a Grammy and Emmy-winning singer-songwriter. You can see in the road this year. Tickets for the Human Tour are on sale now. Brandi Carlisle, thank you so much for joining us. I'm very good at that.

31:55Paula Poundstone:Thank you. Bye, Brandi.

31:57Luke Burbank:Bye, Brandi. Thank you so much. Awesome. Thank you. In just a minute, Bill shakes his moneymaker in our Listener Limerick Challenge. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to join us in the air. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPO.

32:17This message comes from Whole Foods Market. Save now during the Summer Splash event at Whole Foods Market. Find great everyday prices on 365 brand ground beef for the grill and ice cream for dessert. Look for yellow sale signs on ready-to-cook beef or chicken kebabs, too. Level up with savory marinades, spices, and rubs. And complete your cookout with cherry pie and new balsamic chicken salad from the prepared foods counter. Get Summer Splash savings now at Whole Foods Market. This message comes from Travel Nevada. Pop quiz. Where can you find 60 million acres to discover? The Silver State. A place like no other.

32:54The desert has a way with words. Ghost towns, saloons, and burrows and herds. No bluffs or limericks. Just wide open, wild, and terrific. It's time to get a little out there. To the heart of Nevada, to be more specific. Plan your trip at www.travelnevada.com. This message comes from Granger. This is the story of The One. As a maintenance supervisor at a manufacturing facility, he knows keeping the line up and running is a top priority. That's why he chooses Granger. Because when a drive belt gets damaged, Grainger makes it easy to find the exact specs for the replacement product he needs. And next day delivery helps ensure he'll have everything in place and running like clockwork.

33:39Call 1-800-GRAINGER, click grainger.com, or just stop by. Grainger, for the ones who get it done. Support for this podcast and the following message come from strawberry.me. If you could go back and talk to your younger self, would you tell yourself that you have a job that truly makes you happy? Many people are stuck in jobs they've outgrown or never really wanted. A career coach from Strawberry.me can help you move on to something you actually love. Benefit from having a dedicated coach in your corner and get 50 % off your first coaching session at Strawberry.me slash NPR.

34:19Negin Farsad:From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Luke Burbank, Paula Poundstone, and Nagin Farsad. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sagal. Thank you.

34:43Luke Burbank:Thanks, everybody. In just a minute, Bill serenades you one last time with some topical yet beautiful poems in our listener limerick challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. McGeen, according to the Wall Street Journal, to get their kids more time on standardized tests, parents are sometimes claiming those kids are suffering from what? um yeah their kids suffer from like not wanting to do it no no no i'll give you a hint uh it doesn't stand for i be smart oh wait oh wow kids suffer from international baccalaureate syndrome

35:33Paula Poundstone:So close. So damn close. Yeah, I don't remember. Wait, yeah, but pooping and stuff. Yes, pooping and stuff. Pooping and stuff. That would be PAS.

35:43Luke Burbank:Slightly more scientifically, IBS, irritable bowel syndrome. Parents across the country are apparently falsely claiming that their kids have irritable bowel syndrome just so that their kids can have unlimited bathroom breaks during the SAT test. Kids with IBS and similar issues, of course, they're allowed extra time. So many parents have never been more furious to have children without any neurological or medical problems. Why are they, why doesn't the SAT like testing service just provide diapers? Yeah. Sure. That'll show them. That's a, yeah. So basically what's happening is like some parents are accusing other parents of having their kids fake this so they can get that extra edge of constantly being able to take extra time.

36:25Luke Burbank:And it is true, they've done studies of eruptions, if you will, of IBS among young people, and they're sort of centered in wealthy neighborhoods. Wow. Really? So there you go. That's because beans are better for you.

36:43Negin Farsad:As a person who did poorly on the SAT, I can tell you that I would not have traded my low SAT score for my fellow Nathan Hale high school seniors thinking that I was about to absolutely destroy my pants. There's probably like a lesser, there must be like a lesser thing that's like, I'm sorry, I need more time, I have bunions. You know what I mean? Something.

37:06Luke Burbank:I got extra time from my SAT by telling them I had bone spurs. I gotta go. I gotta go. I gotta go.

37:21Luke Burbank:Coming up, it's Lightning Fill in the Blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you like a play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. You can see us most weeks right here at the Studebaker Theatre. in downtown Chicago. And you can catch us on the road as well. We'll be in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, on July 9th and in beautiful Sonoma County, California, making our debut there on July 30th. For tickets and more information to all of our live events, go to nprpresents.org. Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

37:52Paula Poundstone:Hi.

37:53Luke Burbank:Hi, who's this?

37:54Paula Poundstone:My name is Brooke. I'm calling from Pearland, Texas.

37:56Luke Burbank:So what do you do there in Pearland?

37:58Paula Poundstone:I work in the non-profit field.

38:00Luke Burbank:Yes. Oh, more and more of us are doing that.

38:04Paula Poundstone:Highly recommend.

38:06Luke Burbank:Yeah. Well, welcome to the show, Brooke. Bill Curtis is going to read you three news-related limericks with a last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly, and two of the limericks will be a winner. You ready to play? I'm ready. Here's your first limerick.

38:19Negin Farsad:With a permit at age 45, I'm the oldest beginner alive. I stall and I swerve. Go too slow. Hit the curb. I'm an adult who's learning to drive.

38:34Luke Burbank:Yes. A column in The Guardian describes the humiliation of learning to drive as an adult. Makes sense. Nothing strips your dignity away like one of those student driver be patient bumper stickers on your BMW. I should like maybe be taught how to drive by an adult because I have a driver's license but I don't really drive. Yeah. You live in New York. I live in New York City. I don't need it. And then it now it's, I'm just, it's terror. And at one point I was driving in Los Angeles, but then I had to like parallel park. This was years ago and I couldn't figure out the parallel park. And there was a guy and it was a large space.

39:15I should have been able to do it. And ultimately this, I was so stressed out and this random stranger was like helping me. And then I was like, can you just do it?

39:24Luke Burbank:So a random man got in your car and parked it for me as I gently cried on the corner. That's very nice though. It's a lovely story. Thank you.

39:34Paula Poundstone:Did you fill out a police report when he drove off?

39:40Luke Burbank:Here

39:40Negin Farsad:is your next limerick. It's a baby name you will regret. Even Romeo would be upset. G-H-I for a J is just not okay. It's 12 letters to spell

39:58Luke Burbank:goes with Romeo. Juliet. Juliet, yes. This week, the Mirror reported on a woman who is in a horrible fight with her best friend, Lorene, over Lorene's new daughter's name. That new daughter is named Juliet. That's lovely, but Lorene has spelled it G-H-I-U-L-I-Y-E-T-T-E. Juliet. It's an incredibly elaborate way to spell it, and by elaborate, I mean dumb.

40:34Negin Farsad:Was she on Wheel of Fortune when she was naming the kid? It's possible. You do get more points. That's true.

40:42Paula Poundstone:Well, she'll be called Miss G her whole life.

40:45Negin Farsad:Yeah, or whatever her middle name is. What yonder window breaks. Yeah.

40:53Negin Farsad:Here is your last limerick. Older wedding guests started to tut, but mostly we busted a gut. She was doing the worm, but her clutes were too firm, so her dress tore, exposing her... But, yes!

41:15Luke Burbank:Good guess. This week's viral wedding video was of a bridesmaid who danced with the groomsmen down the aisle to the couple at the altar like the cool kids do. And then, as a little extra flourish, both she and the groomsmen hit the floor right in front of the couple to do the worm. And her dress immediately split open from hem to the middle of her back, revealing her entire butt. Everybody knows. That's a terrible faux pas. you're not supposed to steal attention from the bride's butt. Thankfully, somebody captured all this on video from just the right angle behind, and the bridesmaid herself posted it with the caption, and this is true, stop zooming in, you bastards.

42:09Luke Burbank:But then, of course, it led to this insane Bridezilla moment when the bride said, well, I wanted matching bridesmaid dresses, so the rest of you hit the floor. Bill, how did Brooke do in our quiz? Brooke did really well. Got them all right. Wow, Brooke. So they were hard. Congratulations, Brooke. Well done. Thank you so much. Take care and thanks for playing. All right, bye-bye.

42:43This message comes from Whole Foods Market. Save now during the Summer Splash event at Whole Foods Market. Find great everyday prices on 365 brand ground beef for the grill and ice cream for dessert. Look for yellow sale signs on ready-to-cook beef or chicken kebabs, too. Level up with savory marinades, spices, and rubs. And complete your cookout with cherry pie and new balsamic chicken salad from the prepared foods counter. Get Summer Splash savings now at Whole Foods Market. This message comes from Travel Nevada. Sand dunes, old saloons, high noons, pioneer trails and cowboy tales, snooze emails.

43:22Get a little out there. Plan your trip at www.travelnevada.com. This message comes from Grainger. This is the story of the one. As a procurement manager for a hospital system, she keeps every facility in her network stocked and ready. That's why she counts on Grainger to be her single source for thousands of products, from disinfectants to lighting, air filters, and more. And with fast, dependable delivery, Grainger helps her keep every facility stocked, safe, and running smoothly. Call 1-800-GRAINGER, click grainger.com, or just stop by. Granger for the ones who get it done. This message comes from Ethos.

44:03It's easy to put off getting life insurance until something unexpected happens. That makes you realize your family needs you covered. Ethos makes it easy. It's 100 % online, no medical exam, just a few health questions. Apply in minutes and get same-day coverage up to 3 million. Get your free quote today at ethos.com slash NPR. That's ethos.com slash NPR. application times and rates may vary now onto our final game lightning fill in the blank each of our

44:33Luke Burbank:players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as they can each correct answer now worth two points bill can you give us the scores again paula and nagin

44:43Negin Farsad:each have two luke has four all right paula and nagin are tied so paula why don't you go first

44:49Luke Burbank:here we go fill in the blank on tuesday president trump announced a new 1.8 billion dollar fund that could benefit the people involved in blank. January 6th. Right. On Thursday, the DNC released the so-called autopsy of the 2024 blank. Presidential election. Right. This week, the Surgeon General posted an advisory about the dangers of blank time for kids and teens. Screen time. Yes, screen time, Paula. After being forced out by CBS, blank ended his run as the host of The Late Show on Thursday. Stephen Colbert. Yes. This week, analysts reviewing President Trump's financial disclosures suspect that while attempting to buy over a million dollars of pharmaceutical stock, he accidentally blanked.

45:25Luke Burbank:Bought over a million dollars of pharmaceutical stock. No, he accidentally bought more than a million dollars of a conveyor belt sushi restaurant stock because it had a similar name. Following negotiations with FIFA, Mayor Zoran Mamdani was able to secure$50 blank tickets for New Yorkers. Soccer tickets? Yeah, World Cup tickets. Very good. Best known for being the U.S.'s first openly gay congressman, Blank passed away at the age of 86. The great Barney Frank. The great Barney Frank. This week, spectators at a runway show at Sydney Fashion Week were surprised to learn the Avant-Garde soundtrack playing as the models were coming down the runway was actually Blank.

46:08Luke Burbank:Lion King. No, it was actually just the fire alarm going off. the models at this Australian Fashion Week show walked the runway for a good five minutes back and forth as the fire alarm blared

46:20Paula Poundstone:oh my gosh

46:21Luke Burbank:the sophisticated audience was like wow what a cool artistic choice commenting in the heightened sense of emergency in our society the flames and smoke filling the room also a bold choice Bill how did Paula do on our quiz?

46:37Negin Farsad:she got six right totaled a 14 she did very well. She's in the lead. All right.

46:45Luke Burbank:McGeean, you're up next, fill in the blank. On Tuesday, a Trump-endorsed challenger beat Representative blank in Kentucky's GOP primaries. Massey. Yes, Thomas Massey. On Monday, a judge ruled that the gun found in his backpack would be allowed as evidence in the trial of blank. Mangione? Mangione. Luigi Mangione. This week, tens of thousands of people faced evacuation orders as blanks blazed through Southern California again. Wildfires. Right, on Monday, the WHO said that the blank outbreak in Central Africa merited serious concern. Ebola. Right, this week, the new CEO of Xbox announced plans to make that game system relevant again by changing its name to blank.

47:26Uh, Ozempic. No.

47:31Luke Burbank:Good idea. Changing the name from Xbox to Xbox, but now it's in all capital letters. This week, a school in Maine apologized after students attending a dinner at the school were served blank for dessert. Shards of glass. No. Although close, they were served a tray of baked dirt. According to school officials, a science class had been conducting an experiment to see if plants could grow in soil that had been sterilized in the oven. And this baking dish filled with dirt was accidentally picked up with the food for the dinner and placed down the table. And trust us, you do not want to know what those gummy worms actually were.

48:14Luke Burbank:Bill, how did Nagin do?

48:16Negin Farsad:Well, she got four right. Eight more points. Total of ten means Paula's still out there.

48:22Luke Burbank:All right. And now for what I hope is the last math problem you're ever asked to do. How many does Luke need to win?

48:31Negin Farsad:Five to tie. Six to win. Here you go. I just want to double check. You got the note from my mom about the IBS.

48:42Luke Burbank:All right, Luke, this is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Monday, the average blank price in all 50 states rose above$4 a gallon. Gasoline. Right. On Wednesday, the U.S. indicted former Cuban president blank on murder charges. Castro. Right. This week, Iran's leader said that country's enriched blank must stay within its borders. Uranium. Right. On Wednesday, space company blank announced plans to go public. SpaceX. Right. This week, a politician in the UK who declined interviews due to what he said was an important prior commitment was seen minutes later blanking. Feasting on beans. No, drinking beers at a pub.

49:16Luke Burbank:After she was found not guilty of tax evasion, a court ruled that Spain's tax authority must pay pop star blank$64 million. Shakira? Right. On Monday, auditions for who will replace Daniel Craig as the next blank began. Bond. Right. This week, the Washington Post profiled an airport detection dog who recently sniffed out two duffel bags filled with blank. Illegal food. Yes, I'm going to give it to you. 100 pork sandwiches. Merla the Beagle sniffed out the sandwiches at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport, where someone was illegally transporting those sandwiches from Thailand. Officers celebrated this dog for his remarkable achievement, rightly so, because if there's one thing that really proves a dog is an elite law enforcement canine, it's immediately detected when someone is holding a meat sandwich.

50:06Luke Burbank:He should be allowed to eat whatever he catches. Yeah, I think so. That's true. The people with. Yeah.

50:11Negin Farsad:Bill, did Luke do well enough to win? Wow. He got seven right, 14 more points, 18 wins this week. Congratulations. Thank you. Luke.

50:28Negin Farsad:You can hear the enthusiasm in that result.

50:32Luke Burbank:In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict, now that Bill is retiring from our show, what will he do next? But first, let me tell you that. Wait, wait, don't tell me. It's a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions. Hey, Doug, what are you doing here, Berman, benevolent overlord? Philip Godica writes our limericks Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman Our ops manager is Jasira Vardak Thanks to the staff and crew always at the Studebaker Theatre BJ Liedemann composed our theme Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills Miles Dornbos and Lillian King Special thanks to Blythe Roberson and Monica Hickey Peter Gwynn is our Tomato Emma Choi is our vibe curator Technical director is Lorna White Our CFO is Colin Miller Our production manager is Robert Newhouse Our senior producer is Ian Chillock And the executive producer of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me That's Mike Danforth And now, for 12 remarkable years, Bill Curtis has performed with us and he has traveled with us.

51:30Luke Burbank:Hang on. He has traveled with us from Seattle to Florida. He has stood on stages in places like Red Rocks and Carnegie Hall and Tanglewood. And he has said the most ridiculous things in that most serious of voices. And he has often said how lucky he feels to have done all that with us. But Bill, for once, you're wrong. We are the lucky ones, the producers and engineers and managers of our show and the panelists and, of course, me because we got to spend 12 years doing that with you. So let's, in fact, give it up for our legendary anchorman and our dear friend, Mr. Bill Curtis. One more time.

52:22Luke Burbank:Wow. Wow. So panel, what will Bill Curtis do next? Nagin Farsad. He's tired of being objectified for his voice, so he's going to be a male bikini model so he can finally be objectified for his body.

52:38Negin Farsad:Yes, I'll do it. Luke Burbank. Whatever the f*** he wants.

52:51Paula Poundstone:And Paula Poundstone Bill will be applying for the weaponization reparations From the 1.7 billion dollars

53:02Negin Farsad:And if I do any of that We're going to ask you about it And wait, wait, don't tell me

53:06Luke Burbank:So thanks to Nageen Farsad, Paula Poundstone And Luke Burbank Thanks to our fabulous audience Who are here for this show at the Studebaker Theater in downtown Chicago. Thanks for you for listening in wherever you may be. I'm Peter Sagal, and Bill, in the end, the only way you know something is absolutely true is if you say it. So, would you please do the honors?

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