WWDTM: One Last Gift to Unwrap

21:52Before we move on, that's what you do. You invite world-class athletes and ask them silly questions about things you know nothing about, and they agree to it. Well, yeah, we don't warn them in advance. They think we're normal NPR. are. I even have a Steve Inskeep wig. Yeah, I know. I fell for it too.

22:15In August of this year, we went to Minneapolis and were joined by one of the most famous sons of that city, designer Nate Berkus. So let's start at the beginning. You found your love of interior design while you were very young growing up here, right? I did, yeah. Yeah, So how old are we talking? Well, my mother was an interior designer here in Minneapolis. I have a younger sister and a middle brother, and he once coined our family phrase as what we did on the weekends as either shop or be left behind. So my mother would take us to auctions and antiques malls and Stillwater and downtown Hopkins and all these places looking at old things and looking at antiques and vintage things.

22:59And my job was to carry the wallpaper books in from the trunk of her car. to her home office, which is also why I have muscles. That's true, yeah. So you started out both as an interior designer and as a gym rat early on. Yes, exactly, yeah. So if I had met you at, say, the age of 10, would you be, like, all about design and antiques and looks? No, no, but I was definitely sidetracked if somebody was setting up for a garage sale on my way to the bus stop. I'm picturing a young story, like almost a Forrest Gump-like serendipity, where Prince Is putting up plaid all over his estate and you're like my man paisley and then just walk away

23:41I'm actually

23:46Like do you remember the first time you ever like designed something you ever like set up a room? Yeah, no, I do. Yeah My parents gave me my own bedroom because I shared a room prior to that with my filthy younger brother the worst one No, but the first thing I ever was allowed to design was my own bedroom. And I actually wrote about this years ago because it was such an interesting thing for me as a 12-year-old kid to be able to pick out at the time. Again, my mom was an interior designer, so she had all the carpet samples and wallpaper books. And she said to me, what do you want your room to look like?

24:24And I remember it was the 80s. and I said I want gray, white, and red. And she was like, that's so ugly, though. And I was like, but it's cool. And so I remember, though, that it was agency. It's what it felt like. I had the agency to pick my own environment. And I do think that that's why I've spent the greater part of 30 years helping other people create a home that means something to them. I think that that is connected. I think that's great. I do love the idea of you as a, you said 13-year-old? 12. 12-year-old. Which is 12, you know, the early teens, very rebellious age, that the source of your conflict with your mother was color pouts.

25:12Did she, like, you know, search your room and you weren't there and found, like, illicit swatch books in your sock drawer? You come home and she's holding up a Pantone catalog. It was amazing, right. Yeah. No gay porn, just a wallpaper sample.

25:32Let's just be honest. I am. If your 12-year-old kid has wallpaper sample books hidden in his sock drawer, it's essentially the same as gay porn. Either way, you get there. The conclusion has got to be the same. 100%. Did you, like as a young man, was it hard to find places to design? Do you know what I mean? Like if you wanted to be in a band, you get a guitar. Right. Were you like going, I think I could really fix up your ice fishing hut? No, I mean, you know what though? Bobcat, actually, now that you ask. I was notorious among my friends when they would invite me over for a play date or sleepover or whatever.

26:14that I remember my friend Ronnie Swartz, his mother came home and Ronnie and I were like hanging out and like, you know, at their house. And I had pushed all the living room furniture into a different location. So, you know, it wasn't. And she said, did you move my sofa? And I said, yeah. Don't you think it looks better like this? And she said, I do. Wait, I have a question. Yeah. You and your husband are both hot. That has nothing to do with the question. I just wanted to say. Okay. Wait, so since you're both designers, who wins? Do you have a chair in your house that you hate that you put there?

26:53Okay, so here's the thing. If one person hates it, it's out. And we don't talk about it, and you can't try and sell it to the other person. And boy, can we sell s*** to each other. So you can't. If I say I hate it, then the conversation's done and vice versa. we will fight like beyond, like really, really rip each other to shreds over who ate the last piece of pizza before we fight over a sofa. That sounds like couple therapy. Right? I mean, you know. Nate Berkus, we're delighted to have you here. We have asked you to play a game we're calling Try Some Exterior Decorating. So, you do interior decor.

27:37we thought we'd ask you about exterior decor, namely tattoos. Perfect. Is it perfect? Yeah, this is great. So we're gonna ask you three questions about tattoos. Get two right, you get a prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Nate Berkus playing for? Martin Gardner of Minneapolis, Minnesota.

28:01Here's your first question. Ready? When Ariana Grande released her single, Seven Rings, She celebrated by going down to the tattoo parlor and getting a tattoo of the two Japanese characters, meaning Seven and Ring. Seven, Ring. One problem, though, what was it? A, the tattoo artist inked a seven next to a little portrait of Ringo Starr. B, the tattoo artist instead did the Japanese characters for Bad and Blood, because Bad Blood is a Taylor Swift single that he preferred to any of her music. or C, those two characters combined form a proper noun, meaning a small charcoal grill. I'm going with C.

28:43You're correct, yes. It was...

28:49Basically, it's like you try to get something and it ends up just being like a hibachi. Right. All right. Next question. Tattoo artists sometimes make mistakes, like when a cannabis enthusiast asked for a tattoo of a pocket watch showing the time 4.20. But what happened? A, even though it's an ink and never changes, the clock is still always four minutes fast. B, he did the pocket watch with the lid closed, so you can't see what time it is. Or C, he accidentally drew it backwards, realizing afterwards that now the clock reads 7.40. I think he drew it backwards. You're right. It says 7.40.

29:32I had to think I've been just selling bath mats all these years. I know. You could have been acing quizzes, I guess. Anyway, last question. See if you can make this as perfect as everything else is. Sometimes a tattoo artist's mistake turns out to be a kind of happy accident, like in which of these cases? A, a tattoo reading Murphy's Law, i.e. the idea that anything that can go wrong will go wrong, and he misspelled it Murphy's Law. B, an artist putting in the name of a man's new baby put Maya instead of the baby's name, Mara, but it turned out the doctor had made the same typo in the birth certificate.

30:12Or C, a woman got a tattoo of a forest which looked terrible, but it just so happened the tree trunks happened to form a UPC code that gets her the employee discount when she scans it at Nordstrom.

30:27I think it's B. You think it's B, the matching typos? No, it was actually Murphy's Law. It was. It was spelled Murphy's Law. The client saw it and was utterly delighted. Bill, how did Nate Berkus do in our quiz? It was almost perfect, but you still got two out of three, which means you're a winner! Good job, Bob. Good job. Good job. Nate Berkus is an acclaimed interior designer who is up to so many different things. You can find them all at NateBerkus.com. Nate Berkus, thank you so much for being on the 8th of the day. Thank you very much. Thank you, sir. Nate Berkus, everybody. Hometown hero.

31:17When we come back, one of the greatest actors alive talks about getting his farts just right. And the comedian makes the worst mistake anybody can make taking part in a game show. Oh, come on, now you're just trolling me. That's when we come back with more Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

31:44From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR news quiz. I'm Tim Meadows, filling in for Bill Curtis And here's your host at the Studebaker Theater In the Fine Arts Building In downtown Chicago Peter Sago Thank you Tim, thank you everybody Now we're thrilled to have Tim here Because while some of the segments we are Rebroadcasting this week are quite familiar to you They're new to him Well no, that's not actually true I absolutely listened to some of these when they were broadcast Because sometimes the Uber driver Refuses to change the station Well, I hope you didn't hear this conversation with actor Gary Oldman, who appeared in September to talk about the new season of his show about seemingly incompetent British spies, the show Slow Horses.

32:31I asked him about the character he plays, Jackson Lamb. Jackson Lamb, it was once a very, very good agent working for, you know, MI5. What we see when we meet him in Slow Horses is the sort of smoldering embers of a man that was once legendary. I think that Jackson Lamb has the greatest character introduction I have ever seen. When we meet Jackson Lamb, he's having a nap in the office and he farts himself awake.

33:09I mean, let's face it, you've done a lot of good work in your career, Gary, but I don't know if you've ever done anything that immediately evocative. You know, but we do. I never thought I'd see the day where I'm having email exchanges with the director talking about the quality of farts. but because I'm not a method actor so they have to dub it off or should I say I'm not a methane actor

33:53I was going to ask is it like when you have a stand in like you know if someone doesn't want to do a nude scene they have a stand in is there somebody who is farting in place of you? Yeah. Do you have a colon double?

34:07And actually, shouldn't that be the person nominated for an Emmy? Being a little selfish, Gary. No, I'm sure there's someone in the room. Karen, to answer your question, I'm sure there's someone in the room.

34:23And you were nominated for an Emmy. You were there. If I'm not mistaken, you were caught up in the great Shogun sweep of all the awards, right? Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, they were, I think they were nominated for 14 and they won 25. It's amazing. How do they do that? Did you have a speech ready? I've always wondered about that. Yeah, I think it's polite. Yeah, and what do you do with it if you don't get to use it? That's the other question. What was that? well more recently my wife has been keeping them and throwing them sort of in a box in the archive as it were how many do you have well I've lost a lot

35:13I've got quite a collection

35:20Gary it is an absolute pleasure to talk to you again And once again, we have asked you here to play a game. And this time we are calling it... The Slowest Horses of All. You are, of course, star in Slow Horses, as we have discussed. So we thought we'd ask you about the very slowest horses, that is, hobby horses. Hobby horses are, of course, the toy. It's a stick with a horse's head. And people actually ride these hobby horses in competitive events called hobby horsing, where they go around gates and jump over fences and do dressage just like real horses. So we're going to ask you three questions about hobby horsing.

35:58Get two of them right. You will win our prize for one of our listeners, the voice of anyone they may choose for their voicemail. Ayesha, who is Gary Oldman playing for? Martin Oliver of Los Angeles, California. All right.

36:15Ready to do this? Have you heard or seen hobby horsing? I have seen it. Yeah, it's pretty out there. It's pretty out there.

36:28So, now, if you've watched it, and there are many videos online, you can watch them, you'll notice that it's very popular with young girls. But according to Hobby Horse Riders Australia, boys are starting to get interested in the sport, but with a notable change. What is it? A, they prefer hobby warhorsing with jousts. B, they make and ride hobby dinosaurs. Or C, boys' rules allow them to turn the horses around and pretend the sticks are guns.

36:58I'm going to go with jousting. You're going to go with jousting. That is a natural choice, but it's actually hobby dinosaurs. Yeah.

37:08You still have two more chances, so you're all good here. The very first American Hobby Horse Championships were held in Michigan, and the competitors who came had to deal with some significant obstacles, such as which of these? A, due to a quirk in Michigan law, the horses had to be stabled and given adequate food and water, even though they are not real. B, those who flew there could not bring their hobby horses on board the plane because they could be used as a weapon. or C, the Northern Midwest Alliance for Animal Liberation, which on the first day of competition tried to liberate the, quote, spiritual horses?

37:51I'm going to have to go with C. No, I'm afraid it was B. They could not bring the hobby horses onto the plane because they are essentially four-foot-long sticks. You could use them as a weapon. Okay, that was the obvious one. Yeah, I know. All right, you have one more chance here. Let's see what happens. Some competitors use the hobby horse for every event. But, you know, when it's time to retire your loyal hobby horse, don't worry, because you can always do what? A, bring them to Lincoln, Massachusetts, where they can live out to the end of their days with other hobby and rocking horses in a grassy kind of pasture.

38:34E, just break them in half to create two hobby ponies or C, send them to a factory to be turned into wood glue.

38:50I'm thinking when you're done with the horse, I'm not saying that you literally turn it into two ponies, but you just snap this thing over your knee and throw it in the bin. No, it was actually A.

39:10Nobody knows... Nobody knows who put the first rocking horse in this pasture near Lincoln, Massachusetts, but it has been joined over the years by dozens more hobby horses, rocking horses. So, Aisha? Yeah.

39:33Oscar winning actor Gary Oldman do on our quiz well I think that because he has lost a lot and with the Emmys and things like that I think we should give it to him I think you're right

39:53well congratulations on this big win I hope it makes up for everyone

40:01Gary Oldman is an Oscar-winning actor, and if you have not yet watched him in the show, Slow Horses on Apple TV, I envy you because you get to start from the beginning. Gary Oldman, thank you so much for joining us. I'm Way Way Down. What a pleasure to talk to you again. Take care. Awesome.

40:28Finally, also in September, we spoke to comedian and impressionist Jay Farrow, who had just become the host of a new game show called The Quiz with Balls. Really. Tim, do you happen to know Jay Farrow? I actually am Jay Farrow. This is us. I'm doing the Tim Meadows impression right now. That's pretty impressive. Here is Jay as himself.

40:58So first of all, I should say, welcome to the pinnacle of human achievement, the game show host. It's not as easy as it looks, is it? No, no, no. It's not as easy as it looks, and you definitely just have to be able to improv and be able to just think on the fly. On the show and in your own comedy, you are known for these astounding impressions. Is there one, like, in your entire roster of people you can do that you're most proud of? The one that I would say I'm the originator of it and nobody had done it like me was Will Smith. And that one is just that's just one that's, you know, like, you know, that's the one that, you know, everybody pretty much like loves.

41:44Because it's not the kind of impression that's like just found. You know, it's not like a Hot Pocket. It was more like Tenderloin. That was a little eerie is what that was. I'll say, I've seen Jay also does a fantastic. Imagine at some point you ended up slapping yourself. Everybody's asking me. I don't want to feel. I got slapped by the softest man. You got to let us hear it. Okay. Not freaking good. Okay. Okay. Okay.

42:31You know what? I got to say this. Like, you know, I really do apologize. You know, to everybody in America and everybody ubiquitously around the world. What I should have done instead of smacking Chris Rock was I should have waited for the commercial break. and got away with the whole situation.

43:00Well, this might be fun, because who knows, you can do this as a group. Jay Farrow, we have asked you here to play a game we're calling You Can Keep Your Balls. So, as we have established, you host the game show, The Quiz with Balls, So we thought we'd ask you about games that don't require any balls at all. Answer two out of three questions right, and you will win our prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Jay Farrow playing for? Shane Brown of Portland, Oregon. All right. Here is your first question. There's lots of games you can play with a frisbee instead of a ball, but not all frisbees are alike.

43:40You could find yourself catching which of these? A, the combat frisbee lined with razors along the edge. B, Frisbee for dummies, which has an iron coating and comes with gloves lined with magnets, or C, a disc molded out of the ashes of Ed Hedrick, one of the inventors of the Frisbee. Well, I hope it's not the third one. I don't know. I don't know. Kev, what are you? Kev, do you have anything on this? Listen.

44:13Listen, people. Swear to God. Say this. Say this right now. I believe that the answer is B. That's what I think it is.

44:25So you're going to trust Kevin Hart on this, Jay? Is that what you're going to do? I got to trust Kev. I think he knows. He let you down. It was C. It's actually the guy who invented, as part of his will, one of the guys who invented the Frisbee, he asked to be cremated, and then he had his ashes mixed in to plastic to make Frisbees. that were sold for charity, and they're out there in the world. You still have two more chances. All right. Here's your next question. Cornhole, that's the game popular here in the Midwest where you try to toss beanbags through a hole in a board. We all know this game, right?

45:01But there are international variants such as which of these? One of these is real. A, the game of Tejo in Colombia where players throw their bags at exploding targets filled with gunpowder. B, trample in Australia where you bounce off a mini trampoline and try to throw yourself through the hole or C, crick hole in England where the other player can defend the goal with a cricket bat.

45:29You know what? Would Jay-Z help out with this one? Is there something that Jay-Z says a lot that might be the answer? Yeah, basically. After thinking about that comparatively to the other answers, I'll say A. Jay-Z is correct. That is right. And it's absolutely true. Imagine cornhole, but if you hit the target, an explosive charge goes off. Boom. It is the second most popular sport in Columbia after soccer. You know, my intuition spoke for me. That was the hustler, homie. Yeah. Alright, last question. everybody loves to play darts, right? But it's not as easy as it looks. What is a proven way to improve your darts game?

46:21A, just closing your eyes and throwing randomly toward the target. B, spinning around four times and then throwing it like a discus toss. Or C, just getting a little drunk.

46:36Now, let me, before I answer this question, I'm just going to try. There was a lot of fallacy that's been spoken. A lot of things.

46:52I'm going to go with B.

46:57Sir, are you sure?

47:03You shouldn't be crying. Come on, this is a festive time. We're just answering questions. That's all. show me. Have to say it like a dude. For some reason, I've never said this with more pleasure, but you're wrong.

47:24I'm having a lot of emotions here, Jay. The answer is actually C, getting drunk. Studies have proved that just a little alcohol improves your dart game. That's why they play it in bars. But technically, Jay didn't get any of them wrong. He did, Jay. Yes, you walk out of here with a clean record. Bill, how did Jay and his friends do in our quiz? You know, he's a winner, and you're going to leave a winner. Absolutely. Give him a break. It's not your fault. That's it for our It's Tim Meadows First Time Edition. Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions' Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord.

48:04Philip Godeker writes our limericks. Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our tour manager is Shana Donald. BJ Lederman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbos, and Lillian King. Special thanks to Monica Hickey and Blythe Roberson. Peter Gwynn is our belly full of jelly. Our vibe curator is Emma Choi. Technical directions from Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller. Our production manager is Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer is Ian Chillog. And the executive producer of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me is Mike Danforth. Thanks to everybody you heard on today's show.

48:30Our panelists, our guests, guest host Karen Chi, guest scorekeeper Aisha Roscoe, and of course, Mr. Tim Meadows. And thanks to all of you for listening here at the Studebaker Theatre and wherever you might be. I'm Peter Sagal. We'll be back next week. Thank you.

48:58This is NPR.