WWDTM: Pedro Pascal, Chris Perfetti, Heather Gay, and more!

20:16I knew about this kind of like Starbucks loophole that if you got hired, you could be transferred somewhere. And I knew when I went to drama school, I needed a job. And so I didn't tell them, but I applied and got a job in my hometown just so that I would have somewhere to work when I went to school. Oh, wow. Okay, so then they just put you at another Starbucks. Yeah, there's like a few of them, I guess. And then, okay, so as a Starbucks barista, did you intentionally screw up names on the cup? I was not trusted with the customers. They learned very early. They put me at the bar to make the drinks.

21:00I was really good at that. I could, you know, but... Were you doing the heart shapes and the palm tree shapes on the foam? Oh, no. There was no time. What are you talking about? I feel like I worked at quite possibly the busiest Starbucks in the world. And so you were just lucky if your order came out correct.

21:27So you spent this time at Starbucks, but you put a lot of time in serious theater. Is there like a favorite theatrical piece that you did? I don't know. I think doing Shakespeare in the Park really kind of came up first for me. You're doing a play for, first of all, just so many people. It's outdoors, and sometimes it rains halfway through, and you flip and fall on your butt in front of everyone. Did that happen? You fell on your butt in front of everyone? Maybe. Maybe it happened more than once. Now, let's actually, let's talk about Abbott Elementary And there's something about that show, The Elephant in the Room Which is that you have one major quirk in the show Your character is a huge Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me fan

22:24Now, that's, yeah Huge fan of the show Now, I want you to be honest did you know about Wait Wait before you were that character? Are you kidding, Nagin? Oh, thank God. And you saying that just kind of has renewed my fears about season five. I'm terrified about, you know, the line between Chris and Jacob is getting very blurry and decided to not share with Quinta any other personal details about my life because, you know, we show up to a table read and there it is. So, yeah, I'm so glad that that made it into our show. So, like, so when that trait was given to you, did that affect, like, how you did that character?

23:13Was it, were you like, oh, no, I got this. Like, how did, what did you change about the character, knowing that you could go full wait, wait, dork? Um, really not much. I mean, I feel like Poincare has given us such permission to, be sort of the authority on these characters. And I think it made perfect sense. And once again, I'm just like, I'm terrified about what's going to show up next season. Now, actually, so I heard this rumor, and I wonder if it's true. I heard a rumor that your mom pitches ideas for Abbott Elementary. Yeah, she totally does. God bless her. She reminds me that the show is on, and she likes to go through the plot of that week with me when I call on Sundays.

24:09She gives notes? That's always a joy. Yeah, yeah. I'm sure did she also do that with Shakespeare in the Park? My mother has given notes on everything I have done since the day.

24:28So you play this iconic teacher on TV. Have your own teachers from the past approached you with tips or feedback? Oh, no. I think if they ever saw me in person again, they would probably physically harm me. I've been very clear of them, and probably they of me. I made their lives a living hell. Wait, so were you like not a good student? No, not at all. No. No, I really enjoyed school, but school did not enjoy me.

25:13All right, Chris. Well, we've asked you here to play a game we're calling... Abbott Elementary, meet the elementary Abbott. So you star in Abbott Elementary. Don't be scared. Don't be scared. It's gonna be okay. It wasn't good at school, Nadine.

25:35Okay, so you star in Abbott Elementary, so we thought we'd ask you three questions about another kind of abbot. That's right. We're talking about monks. Answer two out of three questions correctly, and you'll win a prize for one lucky listener, the voice of anyone they choose for their voicemail. Bill, who is Chris Perfetti playing for? Jake Evans of Los Angeles, California. Jacob, let's go! Okay, here's your first question. A group of monks in the French Alps have taken a vow of silence, but they are allowed to speak in certain conditions, including which of these? Is it A, when singing along to their favorite Bad Bunny song?

26:19Is it B, when they really need to talk about a cool leaf they saw? Or is it C, when calling the monastery cats to dinner by making kitty-calling noises?

26:35I really didn't think I needed to hear any more options after A, but I'm glad I did. I'm going to go with C, I think. That's right! Very good. That's right. Every abbey makes an exception to their vow of silence as long as the monks are being adorable. Okay, here's your next question. Monks are known for living lives of peaceful contemplation, which is why one monk in Japan got in trouble when he started doing what? Was it A, halfway through meditation time, he loudly said, Boring! is it b angrily responding to every negative yelp review about his monastery or is it c trying to jazz up the chants by doing some sick harmonies i feel like i want to go with b that is right

27:32when one reviewer complained about the food at the abbey the monk responded and this is true Yeah, it's monastic cuisine, you uneducated

27:472025 will do that to a monk Alright, here is your last question Though it surprises a lot of people Monks have unknowingly made a huge impact on pop culture As proven by which of these? Is it A, Law and Order's dun-dun sound is partly a recording of 500 monks stomping on a wood floor. Is it B, the members of the band One Direction first met during a school trip to a monastery, or C, the reason Vin Diesel shaves his head is because a monk came to him in a dream and told him he'd look cool bald.

28:29God bless you. Wait, wait, don't tell me. I'm going to go with... Those are so funny. I'm going to go with A. That's right.

28:44The dun-dun also includes the sound of a hammer hitting an anvil, and if you listen closely, the scream of a man who just hit his thumb with a hammer. Bill, how did Chris Perfetti do? The teacher is always right, and this teacher got every single one correct. Yeah. Yeah. Plumlin's gonna be proud. Congratulations, Chris, you're a big winner. And Chris Perfetti is one of the stars of Abbott Elementary. All four seasons are streaming now. Chris Perfetti, thank you so much for joining us on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. Thank you, Chris. Love you. Thank you so much, Chris. When we come back, we talk to a real housewife of Salt Lake City, and we've got the receipts, proof timeline and screenshots to prove it.

29:35Thank you. That's when we come back with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

29:54From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at the Studebaker Theatre in the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Peter Sagal. Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. We have decided to spend the start of the new year desperately clinging to the old one. Come back, 2025. Come back. We knew all year that no matter how stressful the week was, at least at the end we got to hang out with our panelists, who always made things seem, well, if not better, at least sillier. Here are some examples of what I mean. Luke, an expert on automated customer service lines, has offered some tips on how to get through it to a real person.

30:41For example, he suggests you should say one word over and over. What is that word? I don't think I can say it on public radio. That's right. We've all tried that word, but this is something you can say, perhaps, if your children are listening. Oh, okay. I usually start out yelling human. Yep. And then when that doesn't work, then I break out the F word. Right. This is an alternative to both of those. Okay. He says it'll work. Okay. Can I get a hint? Yeah. It might get confusing if you're calling, say, customer service for the Chiquita Corporation. Banana. Banana. Banana. You can now stop being the worst version of yourself every time you call customer service and end up screaming, speak to human.

31:27Representative. Representative. Now you can just say, banana, banana, banana. Say it over and over again. The automated system is looking for certain words, so repeating a nonsense word or a word it's not programmed for over and over will get you transferred to a real person quickly. Wow. So, you have to be a minion? Yeah, pretty much. You just have to be a minion. Wow. Of course, even if this works, it's hard to feel like you're winning when you're the one going, banana, banana, banana. Paula, according to the Wall Street Journal, the cosmetics industry is finally moving away from floral and natural scents.

32:07The latest trend in perfumes and shampoos, stuff like that, is being scented like what? Fish. Ooh. No, I don't think so. I'm assuming it's popular. Industrial waste? No. I'll give you a hint. Insiders say that you should only wear, you have to be careful, you should only wear, for example, Krispy Kreme when the fresh hot sign is lit. Do you smell like donuts? Yes, donuts. Donuts are the new scents. According to Wall Street Journal, dessert-based fragrances now dominate the market. These are all true. There's Natives Boston Cream shampoo. Dove's Confetti Cake Body Scrub Homeworks Apple Cider Donut Fragrance.

32:56They say if you put these on, they give you this aura that says, Tonight I am hitting the club and I am going to attract bees. Never dated so many cops in my life. What the hell's going on? But really, it's the reaction, I think. So strange. My understanding is this. This makes sense because as far as I know, it's the reaction every woman wants to inspire. Excuse me, miss, but I have to ask her, you wearing Duncan number five? Do they make a toilet water with donut smell? Because isn't that what they call one of the products? Yeah, toilet water. Boy, that seems to turn off. Toilet water. I think it doesn't mean toilet in the sense that you're thinking.

33:44Yes, but it's the same word, Peter, and it's pronounced much the same. Peter, in the latest nostalgia craze, more and more 20 and 30-somethings are getting injured doing what? Opening a coconut water. No. Did that happen to you here? That happened to me when I cleared 40. Not a coconut. Just being like... They're getting nostalgic. Jamming themselves into telephone booths. No. Is it something nostalgic like that that young people used to do a long time ago? Well, it's nostalgic from their youth, not from, say, 100 years ago. Well, as a member of that generation, let me just harken back. No, I'll take a hint.

34:24I'll take a hint. It's like, duck, duck, ow, my ACL. Oh, duck, duck, goose. Yes. That's a great hint. And other sort of summer camp. Other playground. Other playground. Yes, what you said. Exactly. Ding! You're so smart. Boy, I did that all by myself Adult field days are all the rage right now Grownups are competing in childhood games, sack races, dodgeball, tug of war They're doing these things with the energy of youth and the knees of age They've even invented new games The most popular one is called limping back to the car But it's people in their 20s and 30s? Yeah They shouldn't be getting injured doing that They should be still doing it well.

35:10We think. One social club in Utah drew over 300 people to their field day event, and the only complaint was people who thought the capture the flag game involved, and this is a real quote, too much running? Yeah, that is a little weird. In their 20s and 30s, they'd be injured from these things. They should not be getting injured. That's like people in the Olympics are that old, right? Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure they are. Yeah, exactly. I think I would do it if I could play children, because I think I could beat them. I think I could beat children, says Peter Sagal of NPR's Wayway Total.

35:47You know what? The federal government just pulled their funding again. I know. Joyelle, a recent survey of kids in the U.S. shows 40 % of children think bacon is what? Delicious? Perhaps I shall give you a hint, Joyelle. For sure. I would appreciate that. I think we all would. Thank you so much. You can say to the kid, you know, eat all you want. It grows on trees. Oh, gosh. A plant? Yes, they think bacon is a plant. A survey in the Journal of Environmental Psychology showed 40 % of kids surveyed think bacon is a plant. The same amount of adults think it's a donut topping, which is even weirder.

36:31I did used to work at a diner that had vegetarian options, and I did once serve what was supposed to be a tempeh BLT, an actual BLT to a vegetarian. And I was like, how is everything? And I saw it, and they went, this is the best tempeh I've ever had. And I just looked at them and went, it's really good.

37:04Finally, one of the surprise TV hits of the year was Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. John Oliver, for example, said that no matter what your favorite show was, Real Housewives of SLC was better. So, of course, when we visited Salt Lake in August, we welcomed that show's breakout star, Heather Gay. Peter asked the obvious question to a real housewife. Is she real? We are all pretty real. And I think Salt Lake City keeps us real. Like, we're all each other has in this community. And we have grown up here. We have lived here. We have roots here. And we are just messed up enough to keep it interesting.

37:47Do you think you are representative of the Housewives of Salt Lake City? Like a random sample could have ended up with the same cast. Yes. I feel like we are representative of the Housewives of Salt Lake City. there's a little something for everybody. There you go. Now, I just want to make everybody clear, to people who aren't familiar, this is not Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. Okay? Different show. For someone who's new to it, how would you tell the two shows apart? I would say that we are the Mighty Oak, and Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is the acorn that fell and sprouted as a result of us. Whoa!

38:21Oh! Wow. You better tell them. Tell them, baby. We proved the market. Tell them, baby. And we created, you know, a little bit of Mormonism in the zeitgeist. Yes. It created intrigue, I think. That mighty yoke is casting some shade. So Housewives shows are known for the Housewives starting the show every season by turning to the camera, right? And giving your opening line. Was there a technical term for that? It's called your tagline. Your tagline. Yeah, your season tagline. Can you share some of yours? My first one was, just like my pioneer ancestors, I'm trying to blaze a new trail.

39:01That shoulder rotation is so important. And then I think season two was, I was raised Mormon, but now I'm raising a glass of champagne. That's good. Yeah, I've had a couple. I've had six now. No, yeah, six. Wow. Do you workshop them? Do you try them out? They're assigned. No. No. You're allowed to contribute ideas, but they shut those down immediately. Wait a minute. My world has been rocked? Somebody wrote that for you? Well, I had alluded so much to my pioneer ancestry that it kind of wrote itself. In a weird way. Yeah. And you can kind of like, they'll give you three or four to keep you guessing.

39:49and you can kind of try to mess up the ones that you don't like, that don't represent you fully. Do you remember any of the bad ones, the ones you tried to kind of fumble? Well, they're usually picked. I remember, like, I may be a bad Mormon, but I'm always a good time. And I think I said that in a funny way, and they used the funny way, which made it invariably worse. Heather, a huge fan. So glad you're here. Love you. I cannot believe that my worlds are colliding like this. Would you indulge me? Could I workshop a tagline? Anything, please. I don't wait, wait, but I always tell. There you go.

40:31I love it. And then I turn. It's pretty good. Very good. Better than pretty good. If the world could have seen Shane, your smoldering glance. Thank you. And I am willing to relocate to Salt Lake City. You have a new book called Good Time Girl. Yes. And this book is sort of a recounting of your various exploits, presumably once you left the LDS Church. Can you give everybody sort of a taste, a sample of the stories you tell in your new book, Good Time Girl? My senior trip to Tijuana, where I discovered that I might be more of a good time girl than I anticipated. Sure. As one does in Tijuana. It's right there in the name.

41:12Yeah, and I thought I was having the most worldly foreign experience of my life. Tijuana. Right. But then I later went on a mission for my church in the south of France, which ended up being even more of an adventure. It's amazing. I didn't realize that you had gone on an LDS mission to the south of France. If only the church had not sent you to a place with wine. Yes. The land of love. And I was preaching celibacy and sober living. Not so great. Not so great. Not so receptive. The mission was actually closed down. When in Provence. Yeah, don't be Mormon. That's what they say.

41:55Well, Heather Gay, we could talk to you all day, I think, but we have asked you to play a game we're calling Good Time Girl Meet Good Crime Girl. As you know, some women aren't as virtuous as you, and they cross the bright red line of the law. So we're going to ask you three questions about female criminals. If you answer two correctly, you'll win our prize for one of our listeners. Also, who is Heather Gay playing for? Melissa Snyder of Mill Creek, Utah. I love Mill Creek! There you go. Everybody does here. So here's your first question. A woman in Florida took a lift to a gas station, robbed it, and then when tried to get back in the lift, the driver refused.

42:39So, what did the woman then do? A, gave the driver one star and sent a detailed complaint to Lyft. B, returned all the stolen goods, gave up in the robbery and got back in the car. Or C, just called an Uber instead because they'll do anything. Well, I'm wondering if the Lyft had a pink mustache attached to the fender or not. because that could be a factor. As an Uber fan, I'm going to go with C. You're going to go with Uber. Yes, that's what she did. I'm applauding for myself. We have to do that on Housewives because no one else will. The Lyft driver called the police, and the police found her waiting for the Uber she had ordered.

43:26All right, very good. Here's your next question. A Massachusetts woman convicted of making and possessing cocaine, meth, LSD, D, and other drugs in 2016 got sent to prison, but also, of course, lost her job. What was her job? A, she was the president of DARE, the police program to encourage kids not to use drugs. B, the scientist in charge of drug testing for police across the state of Massachusetts. Or C, Harvard law professor. I'm just going to zero in on the making of and assume that there is some scientific background for the chemical creation of such a litany of drugs, which I'm completely unfamiliar with.

44:07Absolutely. Wait a minute. Let me quickly check the index of your new book. I'm a good time girl, not a great time girl. Okay. You'll know our limits. So I'm going to go with B. You're going to go with B. That's right. She was in charge of drug testing. He says that she went to work high on cocaine every day for eight years. Wow. She sounds like a real housewife. Oh, yeah. All right. You're doing great. Let's go for perfect. One of the most famous lady lawbreakers of all time was Ma Barker, whose kids and husband were part of a notorious gang of bank robbers back in the 1930s. But she was also a beloved cultural figure, as evidenced by what?

44:53A, Barker House Rolls, based on her family recipe, which were later changed to Parker House Rolls because of her bad press. B, people came out to have picnics while watching her final shootout with the FBI. Or C, while on the run, she got an endorsement deal from Smith & Wesson, which she called, quote, Mama's Little Helper. I mean, I believe that Angie Dickinson started a movie called Big Bad Mama in the 70s. Was that based on Mama Barker? I don't know. Well, I only could watch it when my parents weren't home on HBO in segments. So I'm going to go with Bea. You're going to go with Bea. They came out to watch her have her shootout.

45:36That's right. Wow. Yeah. It happened. Don't challenge me with perfection. I will take it. It happened naturally in Florida. and the shootout with the FBI laughed in so long the people were like, oh, this will be fun and they packed a picnic lunch and they came out and they watched the gunfight. Wow. Yeah. Well, I mean, you got it right and that just goes to show you kids, please stay up late and sneak and watch HBO. Yeah. You'll be a winner. It's good to be gleaned from rated R movies. Yeah, there you go. Also, how did Heather Gay do in our quiz? She did criminally well, three out of three. Heather Gay is an author, but of course one of the real housewives of Salt Lake City.

46:18Her new book, Good Time Girl, is available now. Please give it up for Heather Gay. Thank you so much for being on my way. That's it for our happy old years day edition. We'll be back next week with a new show. But first, let me tell you all that Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ. Chicago, in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord. Philip Gotica writes our limericks. Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our tour manager is Shana Donald. B.J. Lederman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbos, and Lillian King.

46:53Special thanks to Monica Hickey. Peter Gwynn is our real house husband. Our visuals host is Emma Choi. Technical directionist from Lorna White, our CFO, is Colin Miller. Our production manager is Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer, that's Ian Chilog. And the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Michael Danforth. Thanks to everybody you heard on our show this week. That would be all our panelists, our guests, our guest hosts, Tom Papa and Nguyen Farsad. but of course, Bill Curtis. And thanks to all of you for listening. I am Peter Saga. We'll grudgingly admit it's a new year when we see you next week.

47:32This is NPR.