WWDTM: Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe

0:04From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. Get out your diaper, cream. I am the voice as smooth as a baby's butt.

0:22I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at the Studebaker Theater at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois, filling in for Peter Sagal, Dulce Sloan. It's-a-me! Hey! Thank you! Thank you, Bill, and thanks, everybody. We have a great show for you today. Now, I know some of y 'all are wondering, how does she get this job filling in for Peter Sagal? I mean, well, who knew that a man who runs so much couldn't beat me in a leg wrestling match? Later on, we'll be talking to sports power couples Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe

1:04about their new podcast, A Touch More. But first, it's your turn to touch us more. I'm single. By giving us a call, the number is 888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 888-924-8924. Now let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi, you're on. Wait, wait, don't tell me. Hi, my name is Katie Peel, and I'm calling from Denver, Colorado. Now what do you do in this here Denver, Colorado, up there in the mountains where you can't breathe? Well, I am a recently resigned public school teacher, and I manage a small coffee shop in a farm-to-table restaurant. Ooh, okay. That's very Colorado. Very NPR. Well, Katie, hey girl, hey!

1:45Let me introduce you to our panel. First is a comedian performing soon in Sunnyvale, California and eerie PA and host of the trivia podcast Go Fact Yourself, airing now on LAS Public Radio. It's Helen Hong! Hello! Hi, Katie! Hi, everybody! Hi, everyone! Next, the comedian will be part of Kyle Kinane's Kinane's Giving Show on November 27th at the Talia Hall in Chicago. It's Adam Burt. Hello, Katie. And the comedian will be at Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia November 9th through the 11th. It's Alonzo Bode. Hello, Katie. Hey, girl. Welcome to the show, Katie. Now, you're going to play Who's Bill this time.

2:29Bill Curtis is going to read you three quotes from this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain two of them, you'll win our prize. Any voice from our show you choose on your voicemail. You ready? Yep. Okay. Here's your first quote. All the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies. That was somebody. Adding her name to the many celebrities endorsing Kamala Harris this week. Who was it? Beyonce? Beyonce! With less than two weeks till election day, the celebrity endorsements are rolling in. Harris has now wrapped up Beyonce, Eminem, Taylor Swift, and Bruce Springsteen, while Trump has earned the endorsements of Joe Exotic from Tiger King and a bunch of people on Jeffrey Epstein's flight, Dossier.

3:23And it's not officially an endorsement. You know, Beyonce just appeared at a Kamala Harris rally in Houston yesterday. You know, it was a move that, you know, she said, I support Kamala, but not enough to fly to Pennsylvania. And that is my Beyonce impression. I love that, I love that because they keep saying, oh, it's unofficial. It's unofficial. Like, really? Really, Beyonce is unofficially endorsing Kamala? Come on, I think we're a little bit past coy. What if she was a big RFK person? What if Beyonce was like, I don't know, there's just something about him. That's the question. Where's the surprise?

3:56Is anyone surprised that Beyonce is supporting Kamala Harris? Only people who are surprised are the people who still claim to be undecided. Right? Those geniuses who are like, oh, well, if Beyonce's involved, maybe I can make a decision. I mean, what other endorsement? Let's see. Who else could there be? Well, we did have a very, according to my notes, this week we also got the October surprise, the endorsement that could change the race. Now, Kamala Harris, this is true, got the endorsement of, wait for it, the insane clown posse. Because, like, you know things are getting crazy when Shaggy Too Dope is out here calling for a saner clown posse.

4:41All right, all right, Dulce. You backed me into a corner. I, Alonzo Bowden, now officially endorse Kamala Harris. Thank you!

4:52Alonzo! I'm shocked. I was at the edge of my seat the entire time. I didn't even know you were a juggalo.

5:04Trump got a huge endorsement this week. Trump was endorsed by E. coli. Oh, yeah. He was pretending to work at that McDonald's. Yeah, and five days after he worked at McDonald's, E. coli was like, well, if you let him in, you've got to let us in.

5:24All right, Katie, here's our next quote. Are you sure? Would you like three more months at half price? Those are questions we may never see again. Thanks to a new federal ruling making it easier to do what? I'm not sure. Can I have a hint? Okay, I can give you a hint. Like, say you want to stop the gym. Like, you know how Planet Fitness will con you into thinking you're going to come back? This new law will make it easier For you to not have to eat donuts In a gym Gym members? You know what Katie? You were close enough It's cancel subscriptions The new law is called click to cancel It requires that you be able to Cancel a subscription the same way You signed up for it Right?

6:13This is the kind of news That is going to have a million Americans going wait I subscribe to Peacock? So this works so this allows you to cancel the same way you signed up so do I have to be drunk? I think that's between you and your God. Because under the rule if you sign up with one click you have to be able to cancel with one click. So you just look for a little button on the screen that's like a little puppy that says but if you cancel I'll stop. Now, do you have to subscribe to click to cancel in order to click to cancel? That's going to be the next thing. Are you subscribed to click to cancel?

6:53No, well, then you can't click to cancel. I don't know if we've hit that rabbit hole yet. Can they just have a button to tell Duolingo just to calm the hell down? I'll learn French on my own time. Stop yelling at me. All right, Katie, here's your last quote. For fonder farewells, please use the parking lot. That is a new sign at an airport in New Zealand, the first in the world to institute a rule limiting what to three minutes or less? Like a goodbye hug? Yes! Sighting the delays caused by long goodbyes, an airport in New Zealand is now limiting hugs in the drop-off zone to three minutes or less.

7:36So get ready to look over from that long hug and see a TSA agent standing there with a stopwatch and a taser. They're going to regret the specificity of that language, of that word hug, when people are like, well, technically we're having sex. I'm not... My arms aren't anywhere near her. Which film you can get done in three minutes if you've got to fight. My thing is, and I don't know what airports, I guess it's different in New Zealand, any airport I've been to, you can't have your car parked in front for three minutes. Yeah, no. You stop, and that cop's like, wait a minute, keep moving, keep moving.

8:13I mean, I would love to meet the bitter, lonely, can't-get-a-ride-to-the-airport-ass person who came up with this one. This is from an airport in New Zealand, which I feel like this is so off-brand for New Zealand that I'm convinced this is one airport official in New Zealand who just has a really clingy mother. Who's just like, honey. And he's like, Mom, I know, but the rules. And also, I can't feel my left shoulder anymore. I'm sorry. I have to go. It could be the fact that every flight from New Zealand is so long that you've got to say goodbye. Like, you know, I may never see you again. You're about to board this 19-hour flight for civilization.

8:53Oh, like flying Spirit Airlines. It's like this hug going to be long. Because I might not make it out of the bad neighborhood that is this plane. A three-minute long hug is a really long hug. No, it's not! Yes, it is! What is wrong with y 'all? Three minutes is not a long time! Lucy, you can microwave two frozen burritos in three minutes. Do you know how much you can get done in three minutes? That is an epic hug, three minutes. All right. Bill, how did Katie do on our quiz? She's a champion. She got them all right. Yay!

9:31Good going, Katie. Don't worry, Katie. I do your voicemail, girl. All right. Thank you so much. Thank you.

9:46I think we're out of time. Right now, panel, time for you to answer some questions from this week's news. All right. Now, Alonzo, if you work in New York City, a new bill says that you can use a sick day not just when you're sick, but also when your what is sick? Your dog, your pet. Yes! Absolutely. When your dog is sick. A New York City councilman is introducing a law that would require employers to let people use sick days if their dog is sick. Now, it makes sense because you don't want to be the guy in the office who gave everybody heartworms. Well, this is an interesting law in New York because they're New Yorkers.

10:32If a New Yorker calls in sick and you say, what's wrong with you? You get none of your business. I'm sick. And they go on about their day. Do you have to prove, like, do you have to get on a Zoom call with your boss and hold up, you know, Buddy? And Buddy's just like... And what if it's one of those breeds that always looks sick? Yeah. Like a Frenchie or something that's just like... And you're like, see? He can't even breathe. Come on. I don't know about all these anti-dog people, but if my dog is sick, I ain't showing up.

11:10Yeah, all right, all right. We're clapping that, because that's the most American nonsense I've ever heard. Sick days for dogs and Amazon employees don't get any? If I was an Amazon employee, I would start dressing up like a Shih Tzu just so I could get a couple of days off.

11:32Coming up, our panelists send their greetings in our Love the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT-TO-PLAY. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

11:51From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Adam Burke, Alonzo Bowden, and Helen Hong. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois, I'm filling in for Peter Sagal. It's Dulce Salone. Thank you. Right now it's time for the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. What's the listener game? Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play our game on air or check out the pinned post on our Instagram page at Wait, Wait, NPR. Hiya, I'm Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, this is Kristen from Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh? I've been to Pittsburgh?

12:38What you doing, Pittsburgh, girl? I'm a high school teacher, and in my spare time, I volunteer at a cat rescue called Pittsburgh Cats. Yeah! Right. Thank you for helping the kitty cats. It's so nice to have you, Kristen. Now, you're going to play our game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. What's the topic, Bill? Greeting cards in the news. Ooh. Oh, greeting cards, the perfect way to tell someone you do care about them, but not enough to send an actual gift. Our panelists are going to tell you about an incident involving a greeting card that made the news this week. Pick the one who's telling the truth and you'll win our prize, the wait waiter of your choice on your voicemail.

13:21Are you ready to play, Kristen? I am ready. Ay, first up, it's Helen Hong. Getting laid off is never fun, but getting laid off and not even getting a goodbye card from your co-workers, well, that's just criminal. That's what a woman claimed in court when she sued British Airlines for not giving her a farewell card when she left the company. The cardless woman, who happened to be named Karen, was so offended that she took legal action. Cardless Karen and the obviously not great lawyer who took on her case had a rude awakening in court when a former colleague testified that they did buy a card, but they didn't give it to her because only three people signed it.

14:16awkward undaunted cardless Karen is now preparing lawsuits against a busload of strangers who didn't all say bless you after she sneezed a greeting card lawsuit from Helen Hong your next noteworthy note card comes from Adam Burke nothing says you care for someone like a homemade greeting card and nothing says you really care for them like getting a professional to make it for you But not everyone can afford their own writers and artists, which is where bespoke greeting card startup Heart Murmurs comes in. The Iowa-based company seeks to automate the process by using AI to write and design cards tailored to your loved ones.

15:00Explains founder Hans Bowman, for our initial testing, we wanted to see what we'd get with zero human intervention. It was here the limitations started to show, with participant Lisa Crowther having to apologize to her 72-year-old mother after the latter received a godly decorated card that read, Roses are red, and neither are you. F. Patrick Mahomes, you're 72. As Bowman explains, the AI scrubs your social media to sound more like you, so if you say a lot of profane things about the Chiefs, that might come up. Even more bizarre were some of the attempts at festive missives, with one Ellis Hoskins getting her card reading, Happy Holidays, Ellis.

15:42Santa is coming for you. There is no escape. Ho, ho, ho. Clearly we've got some work to do, says Bowman. All right. AI going a little too far from Adam Burke. And your last story of some paper in the paper comes from Alonzo Bowden. When Motor Week magazine writer Peter Seat finally met with the famous Airbags Car Club in Detroit, it wasn't just their collection of old cards that stood out. It was their collection of greeting cards. What's with all the cards? Well, founding Airbags member Gonzo Raymond isn't just the owner of a 1963 Impala convertible. He's also the owner of some very passionate opinions about e-cards.

16:27Turns out he hates them. So everyone started sending him cards, not just birthday and Christmas cards, cards for everything. Did you know April 14th is National Ex-Spouse Day? January 21st is Squirrel Appreciation Day? National Left-Handers Day is August 13th. They even got him a card for nothing on January 16th, because that's National Nothing Day. Okay, Kristen

17:03You've got Helen's story about a woman suing for not getting a farewell card Only to realize she had one It was just too pathetic to give to her Adam's story about an AI company writing cards that are a little too personal And from Alonzo Bowden E-cars turn an old card collector into a greeting card collector Which story is the real story? Okay, this is pretty tough, but I think I'm going to go with Adam's story because as a teacher, I encounter a lot of bad AI sometimes from students who are rushed to get an assignment in. Oh, okay. Well, to find out the correct answer, we spoke to someone covering the real story.

17:45They discovered that the company had a card for Karen, but only two or three people were actually willing to sign it. that was Allison Levins from the Hammer and Nigel show talking about the real story of the card no one wanted to sign I'm sorry Kristen but Helen had the real answer

18:10I'm sorry you didn't win but you did earn a point for Adam thanks for playing with us goodbye thank you Thank you. Bye.

18:32And now it's time for a game we call Not My Job. Basketball and soccer legend Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe are a true sports power couple with seven Olympic medals, countless championships, and a presidential medal of freedom between them. Oh, where y 'all keep all these medals at? They're also the hosts of A Touch More, a show about women's sports that's given their track record. We'll probably be the first podcast to win a Nobel Prize. Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me!

19:10Okay, so since y 'all got all these accolades, do you prefer legends or ghosts? Like, how do you like to be referred to? legend legend okay that's classy so i do have a question about just podcast it's called a touch more correct now i want to know how did you shift the podcast from like a tipsy instagram live so like a full podcast well we took out the tipsy part that helps got a couple of google docs going and that's basically it. That's basically it. We're pretty much doing the same thing. We have no idea what we're doing. Sam's the tipsy. I know, we're like, who gave us these jobs? We did.

19:55So, Miss Sue, who's a dream guest for the podcast? Ooh, a dream guest. I mean, we wouldn't mind having Kamala Harris on, so that would be nice. Yeah.

20:12This is Megan. Praying for President Harris. Yeah. Have you called Beyonce? Because she knows her. She's got an in. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. I'll have to, I'll text her when we're done. Hey, Beyonce, we need Ms. Harris's number. Thank you. Okay, now, I do have some questions. Y 'all are like, just like this, you know, super sports power couple, just the strongest calves of any relationship. I do have a question, since y 'all are just these iconic, like, legends of sports. Do you remember watching each other play, like, before y 'all met each other? Were y 'all fans of each other before y 'all met?

20:50Megan. Megan says yes. Megan watched me in college. How do we feel about this?

21:02I do wonder, like, are y 'all very competitive because you are sports-led? So it makes sense. You know, medals and stuff. A family game night. Is it better if y 'all are on the same team or opposing teams? Megan won't play games, y 'all. Like, Megan won't play games. It's so frustrating. Really? She won't play cards. She won't play anything. I'll play some cards, but I don't like to be competitive in life. Even on the field, I was like, wow, so much. Girl, what? You have medals. They gave you a big-ass shoe.

21:41I always figured the person who won four World Cups wasn't that competitive. I mean, we were going to win.

21:54I like that. So there's seven Olympic medals. There's championships. There's a giant shoe, a medal of freedom. Where do y 'all put all these awards? Does your living room just look like a high school lobby? Like, is that where y 'all? We actually have none of it in the house. None of it. What? It's all in storage or in a safe or something. So one year we decided, let's be smart about this and buy a safe. So we bought one of those small ones, whatever you put in a closet. And then we put it in there. But we never got to the part where you have to drill it into the wall. So somebody could just really come and take the safe.

22:33This sounds like the most insane episode of Storage Wars in about 20 years. I'm just thinking of all the people you two have beaten for championships and medals and honors. And they're like, they don't even care. I trained my whole life. They don't even care. The medals locked away somewhere. I cried when I lost. unsecured safe just floating around somewhere i could have just waited and got a jackhammer basically yeah i might as well be in a shoe box geez it was at one point it was yeah we up this is the upgrade wow are you against just being ostentatious do you feel like it's too flashy it's too gaudy like why don't you have these a little bit yeah really you and like you're not gonna wear them they're heavy if i want a giant shoe i would be wearing that thing around my neck every single day i would like i would like your podcast to start with the sound of you just taking all your medals out it's the first 20 minutes It's actually her.