WWDTM: Tiffany Haddish

23:55Retroactively, I am very excited and extraordinarily embarrassed. I am like, because that's, yeah, that, whoa. That's the Jewish way. It is. Well, yes. Yes. Peter, I'm going to be real with you. I've seen Tiffany. She could make a dreidel spin without spinning it. She's got that energy. You recently had your own bat mitzvah, right? You turned 40. Yeah. It was a few years ago. A few years ago. It was a few years ago. Who did you hire? because you have convinced me of the usefulness of this. Did you hire your own energy producer for your bat mitzvah or did you handle that yourself? I hired the same company that I used to work for.

24:36I hired them and we brought in younger, more vibrant energy producers. And then like Billy Crystal did my Aaliyah. No kidding. Silverman's sister. She, you know, officiated my whole bat mitzvah. Susan Silverman. Like it was the most beautiful It was beautiful. I want to ask you, one of the things I also learned is that during your years of struggle, you still had ambitions. You knew and you said sometimes in public that you were going to make it. You were going to be big. Now that, well, you have. You became incredibly famous with Girls Trip and many stuff since then. What is the first thing you did when you started making real money?

25:14I bought a microscope. A microscope? Yeah, I bought a$359 microscope that took pictures of bacterias. and I could upload those bacterias to Google and I could find out exactly what it is. To me, okay, so in my mind, it was me developing my relationship with God and just seeing all the things he created. And did you know that some bacterias look just like people? Really? I mean, I thought they were like, some of them were like rod-shaped and some of them were squiggly, but you're saying that you look through that? Yeah, and some of them as ugly as, just ugly. And I'm like, oh, God, I see what you was doing.

25:52This guy's a bacteria like this, right? Like this candida. And I know that. And I'm just curious about all this stuff God does. Like, that's why I like swimming with sharks and stuff. Because you see all the plant life and animal life down there. He's just like, look how creative he is. He's so creative. That could be your last thought just before one of those sharks eats you. I know. I know, right? See, here goes the thing. Sharks don't really like people like that. That's why they bite them and spit them out. Because we too acidic. So as long as I keep drinking soda, girl, I'm good. Tiffany Haddish, it is a joy to talk to you, but we have invited you here to play a game.

26:30And this time we are calling it... Girls Trip Meet Girl Strip. You start in Girls Trip, so we're going to ask you about comic strips about girls. Girl strips. Get it? Yeah. Answer... Okay. Oh, I thought there was going to be something else. I'm like... I know. I know. If you're the boy strip, I know about the boy strip club. I bet you do. But no, I wanted to clarify that's what we're doing. We're a weekend show for families. So here you go. Family show. Let's go. So answer two to three questions right. You'll win our prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Tiffany Haddish playing for? Liz Patterson of Atlanta, Georgia.

27:06All right. Here's your first question. The most famous girl strip is, of course, Kathy, that long-running strip about a single woman with issues. Kathy ended its run in 2010, but it left its mark on the comic strip industry. How? A, the strip in which she married her boyfriend Irving was so bad, the phrase marrying Irving now means ruining your comic strip forever. B, whenever a comic strip writer can't think of something for a character to say, they just say, Like Kathy did. Or C, the highest praise one comic artist can say to another is, I thought I was reading Kathy. Two. You're going to go for B.

27:43No, I'm afraid it was marrying Irving. Really? Marrying Irving because people believe that that completely ruined... That's like the comic strip equivalent of jumping the shark. Here's your next question. The Barbie doll was in part originally inspired by a German newspaper comic strip called Lily. Who was Lily, the character Lily? Was she A, the beautiful wife of an ugly bricklayer named Kenneth, B, a quote, high-end call girl, or C, a beauty pageant winner who became a surgeon, an astronaut, and an Olympic gymnast? I'm going with B. You're going to go with B? Yeah, because the way her makeup was and stuff, and she always had her boobs out.

28:22That's right. You have figured it out. That's what Lily was. So Lily was a... You got it right. Lily was a risque comic for adults in the 50s in Germany, and the company started making dolls of Lily, and the wife of one of the founders of Mattel was in Germany, saw one and said, hey, I can work with that. All right, here's your last question. in the comic strip Little Orphan Annie ended its run in 2010. What was the adorable orphan's fate in the very last Little Orphan Annie comic strip? Was it A, she was being held captive by an Eastern European war criminal? B, she discovered her real parents were the Romanovs, making her heir to the Russian throne?

29:00Or C, she instantly aged the 90 years that had passed since the first strip and crumbled into dust? Like Thanos? Very much like Thanos, yes. What was A again? A again was that she was being held captive by an Eastern European war criminal. Then I'm going to go with she got kidnapped, and that's how they came with the movie Taken. That's exactly right. Wow. In fact, I believe in the final frame of the final strip, Daddy Warbox is saying into a phone, I have certain skills. Bill, how did Tiffany Haddish do in our quiz? Are you kidding? She rewrote the quiz. She's a winner in everything. You have brought the energy in this little right.

29:54I told you. You told me, and you did not exaggerate. She is. She's still going. She's still going. Brian was your advance man, Tiffany. Tiffany Haddish is an Emmy and Grammy winner. You can see her in her new show Tiffany Haddish goes off It is streaming on Peacock now If it is a quarter as fun As talking to her in real life It will be amazing Tiffany Haddish, thank you so much Thank you for being with us You're the best In just a minute, Bill gives you his tip For staying healthy this flu season In our listener limerick challenge Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to join us in the air We'll be back in a minute with more Wait, wait, don't tell me from NPR

30:42From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We're playing this week with Brian Babylon, Paula Poundstone, and Roxanne Roberts. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Segal. Thank you, Bill. in just a minute, we enjoy the bounty of our annual harvest of limericks. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. But right now, panel, we have some more questions for you from the week's news. Roxanne, athletic gear can be very expensive. A pair of Lululemon pants, for example, can cost as much as$150.

31:22But one solution to get them cheaper is to buy them half. Okay. I'm going to say used. You're right. Used workout gear. It's becoming more and more popular online as people resell their high-end Lululemon sports bras and running shorts, and this time not solely to perverts. That sounds like some OnlyFans actually. Yeah, it does actually, yeah. A lot of times with eating pants, or I like to call them yoga pants or eating pants. Eating pants? Oh, you mean eating? Eating. Like, oh, let me get some eating pants on because I've got a lot of room in them. But it's like, I've noticed a lot of times those in the thighs, they're real rubbed in.

32:01It's like they're all napped up. They get pilly. They get real pilly. Okay, Peter is a runner. His thighs don't even know each other. Wow. Wow. Oh, would that it were so. I would only trust this if you got with the clothes a detailed description of what the person who had owned them before did with them, right? Oh, just your lounge around pants? Fine. Oh, you went to hot yoga in them once? Burned them. You know, our talking is if you're not aware that you can wash clothes. But, Paula, what I'm talking about ain't no washing going to help. When your thighs rub together, you can't wash that away.

32:44No. Got a question for you, Paula, right here. I can't wait. Paula, there's a hot new trend in wedding receptions in addition to a DJ, an open bar, You know the cake many receptions now feature somebody walking around somebody they've hired for this purpose doing what energy produce Wish collapsing and they have to be revived That's not right, but what kind of energy do you think that would bring to a wedding oval office?

33:16Make a good point Will you give me a hint? I'll try to get it Wow, it's like these people must have paid big bucks They got Kenny G Like an impressionist? Like a celebrity No, like Kenny G What does Kenny G do? He plays the saxophone Yes, playing the saxophone Wait, just the sax? Right, just the saxophone If you wish your big day sounded like the loudest parts of a Bruce Springsteen song, we have the wedding service for you. More and more weddings are featuring a, quote, loose saxophonist at the reception. And by loose, we just mean, you know, wandering around without a band or anything. But yes, he will also be sleeping with your most desperate bridesmaid.

34:01A loose saxophonist. A loose saxophonist. I love that phrase. As in saxophonist on the loose. Yeah, loose saxophonist. Why are these couples like asking for a saxophonist? Brides are like, I always pictured that on my wedding day, there'd be somebody there both balding, but with a ponytail. And this seemed like the simplest way to do it. Because they want that slightly mournful Edmund Fitzgerald energy. Well, I mean, you're limited by the fact that they're loose. I mean, you're not going to have a loose kettle drum player. That's true. But I think saxophones are very sexy. You do? Oh, yeah. The beginning of Careless Whisper, is that what they're doing?

34:41Maybe. I'm trying to think of, like, the heat is on. The heat is on. I'm trying to think of all the songs that demand sax energy, and I can't match it up with a wedding reception. We're trying to get turnt up. Sax ain't it. Cocaine is. Yeah.

35:12Coming up, it's lightning fill in the blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. You can see us most weeks right here at the Studio Baker Theater in downtown Chicago, where Catch Us on the Road will be in Phoenix, Arizona, on December 4th, where Tig Notaro will be joining us again on our panel, and we all plan on doing our best show ever just for you. Tickets and info are at NPR Presents. dot org. And if you like our show, but can't stand it for more than a few seconds at a time, check us out at TikTok at Wait, Wait, and VR.

35:49Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, everyone. My name is Benjamin. I'm calling in from Columbia, South Carolina. Oh, Columbia is a great place. What do you do there? I'm a musician. I'm not a saxophone player. Okay. Yeah, but are you loose? It's a shame because there's some money-making opportunities out there. What do you play? Yeah, I missed my calling. I'm a trumpet player and a singer, and once I figure out how to do both of those things at the same time, you will see me on YouTube. I was about to say that those are two sort of mutually exclusive musical specialties. Louis Armstrong did that, right?

36:20Yeah, but he didn't do it at the same time. Yes, I did.

36:28Well, Benjamin, welcome to the show. Bill Curtis is going to read you three news-related limericks with a last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly, and two of the limericks will be a winner. Ready to go? Let's do it. All right, here is your first limerick. Those birds with long wings and a wee skull can steal food and squawk and still be dull, but sound like Bill Curtis and they will not hurt us. A deep voice will scare off a seagull. Seagull, yeah. A recent study has discovered that talking to seagulls in a deep voice will stop them from stealing your food.

37:05But be careful. Many of us have found out the hard way that this is also how you turned them on. Get out of my chips. Pretty much. Pretty much. And Paula, before you ask, this study, this is how they did it. They closed Tupperware container of french fries and they put it on the ground. And when seagulls approached, a recording either played a neutral bird song, that's the control, right? Or a recording of a loud male voice playing at different volumes. Speaking made them walk away. Shouting made them fly away. Conversely, speaking to them after inhaling helium made them eat your face. Because seagulls are savage.

37:49There's a video floating around where there's a seagull that flew down and took a lady's full steak. Wow. A steak. A steak. That's not a mouse. That's a full steak. So, hey, get away from my steak, seagull. I don't know if that would have worked, because that seagull was dedicated. It was, yeah. Here is your next limerick. To dreamland, I'd like to embark. So this shower is hitting the mark. I'm embracing the night by killing the lights. I'm washing myself in the... Dark. Yes, in the dark. Dark showering. literally showering in the dark apparently can calm your brain and allow for a better transition to sleep.

38:31And if you slip on something in the shower that's dark and crack your head, a much faster transition to sleep. Sounds like a safety hazard. Definitely a safety hazard. No, dark showering is very relaxing and very pleasant until you hear a voice from the darkness say, hey, can you pass the shampoo? I can see the Geico Gecko saying, that's not a good idea. Yeah. He's in there too? Yeah, but for insurance purposes, it's like your premium's going to go up. But he was in there looking, though. That was the weird part. Looking up, man. I don't like it. I don't like it. All right, Benjamin, here is your last limerick.

39:10Real doctors, oh heck, what do they know? I will not take meds on their say-so. Raw and sliced for a rash. For a cold, cooked and mashed. I fill up my socks with I'm going to need that one again The only thing that's coming to my brain is Drano Don't put Drano in your socks That's very important Here we go Real doctors, oh heck, what do they know I will not take meds On their say-so Raw and sliced for a rash For a cold, cooked and mashed I fill up my socks With Potatoes Good going If you get your medical advice from TikTok, you've heard that the best way to cure a cold is to put a slice of raw potato on your sock before bed.

39:59I thought this was the dumbest thing I'd ever heard, but then someone explained you're supposed to then put the socks on your feet. The theory is that pressing a cut potato against the skin draws out toxins from the body. But according to a leading pediatrician interviewed by the Washington Post, that does not work. She said, quote,

40:33Bill, how did Benjamin do in our quiz? Oh, boy, did he do a good job. Perfect score. Well done, Benjamin. Congratulations. And good luck on finding that moment that moment when you can sing and play the trumpet at the same time? It'll happen. I'm confident. I appreciate it. You guys have a good one. You too. Take care. Thank you.

41:07Thank you. Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill-in-the-Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. And each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores? Rack them up. Roxanne and Paula each have three. Brian has two. Okay. So let us say then that, Brian, you're going to go first. Brian, the clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, the last blank was minted in Philadelphia. Penny. Right. On Tuesday, a federal judge ordered the release of over 600 people arrested during blank raids in Chicago.

41:42Ice. Right. Right. This week, experts warned against President Trump's suggestion of boosting home sales by offering a 50-year blank. Mortgage. Right. Despite the end of the government shutdown, experts are still warning of potential Thanksgiving blank delays. Turkey? Flight delays. On Thursday, unionized baristas across the country began a strike against blank. Starbucks. Right. On Tuesday, solar storms meant that the blanks were visible much further south than usual. Northern Lights. In what is definitely not a bad omen, a blank was spotted during an oceanfront wedding in San Diego. A pack of sharks.

42:16No, a sinking ship. Wedding photographers caught the sinking ship out in the water while the bride and groom were reciting their vows. It feels like a bad sign, but it's going to be amazing when the couple hit their 50th wedding anniversary and a bunch of kids on TikTok discover that sinking ship for the first time. Bill, how did Brian do in our quiz? Very well. He got five right. Ten more points. Total of 12 and the lead. All right. Okay. Paula, I'm going to select you to go next. Please fill in the blank. On Wednesday, civil rights leader Blank was hospitalized in Chicago. Jesse Jackson. That's right.

42:57Reverend Jesse Jackson. In response to a buildup of U.S. ships in the Caribbean Sea, Blank announced a massive military mobilization. Venezuela. Right. This week, a new report found that 25 % of American families are living blank check to blank check. Paycheck to paycheck. That's right. This week, a federal judge permanently barred the White House from sending blank troops to Portland. Military troops. Specifically from the National Guard. That's right. This week, three men in New Jersey were arrested for planning a huge heist of blank. A huge, the Louvre guys. They were going to rob from the Louvre guys.

43:28A huge heist of stuffed animals from a local amusement park. On Friday, the jackpot for the blank neared$1 billion For the lottery Right, this week police in Indiana had a major breakthrough In the case of a man covered in peanut butter Running around a college campus because they discovered blank A woman running around in jelly No

43:48That's good

43:54That's actually like That would be like the plot of such a great romantic comedy They just keep missing each other, right? They were made for each other No, what they discovered was that the man is actually covered in sunflower butter. For weeks, people at Purdue University have been looking for who they called Peanut Butter Man after blurry videos showed a man covered in peanut butter wandering around campus like a sticky Bigfoot. But good news, police revealed he was a considerate sticky Bigfoot and was actually covered in hypoallergenic sunflower butter. He also identified the suspect, which was actually pretty easy.

44:24He was the one that the canine units could not stop licking. Bill, how did Paula do in our quiz? Oh, we're running so close. She got five right, ten more points. Total of 13. Puts her one point in the lead. All right, so how many then does Roxanne need to win? Five to tie, six to win. All right, Roxanne, here we go. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Monday, President Trump floated the idea of paying Americans$2 ,000 from the money collected for blanks. Terrorists. Right. On Tuesday, Jack Schlossberg, the grandson of blank, announced he was running for Congress. John of Kennedy. Right.

44:59This week, the National Transportation Safety Board arrived in Louisville to determine the cause of a UPS blank crash. The plane crash. Right. According to a new study, listening to music most days could help guard against blank later in life. Dementia. Right. This week, police in Canada said that the men who stole the bus and took it on a joyride there blanked. He made the scheduled stops. Yes, he did a great job driving, didn't vent the bus, picked up all the passengers, he was doing a good job. On Monday, soccer superstar Cristiano Reynaldo said the 2026 blank will be his last. World Cup. Right.

45:26On Thursday, Bad Bunny performed at the Latin blank awards. Grammy. Right. Police in Ireland searching for a possibly escaped lion instead found blank. They found a dog with a lion haircut. You're exactly right. Wow.

45:40They had reports of a lion-like animal roaming the woods, so the Irish police searched for it, and they found instead a very friendly dog named Mouse who had just had his fur shaved to resemble a lion's mane. We are not sure who gave it that haircut and why, but the phrase, an Irish lion was actually a dog named Mouse, sounds like a mnemonic device for remembering a group of regional lakes. Bill, did Roxanne do as well as I thought she did? She's off the scale. Eight right. 16 more points. 19 wins. She came. She saw. She did what she usually does. In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict what will be the Pope's favorite movie of 2026.

46:21But first, let me tell you that Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord. Philip Godica writes our limericks. Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our tour manager is Shana Donald. Thanks to the staff and crew at the Studebaker Theater, BJ Lederman, composer, our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbos, and Lillian in Your Long Shadow. King, special thanks to Mohamed El-Sheikh and Monica Hickey. This week, Tallulah will be playing the role of Peter Gwynn. Our visual host is Emma Choi.

46:54Technical director is Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller. Our production manager is Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer is Ian Chilock. And the executive producer, wait, wait, don't tell me, is Mike Cableknit, Danforth. Now, panel, what would be the Pope's favorite movie next year? Brian Babylon. Are you there, God? It's me, Leo.

47:16I can see why he liked that one. Roxanne Roberts. Dirty Dancing Three Vatican Knights. And Paula Poundstone. Southside Popey, the story of the Pope of the people who fixes his own car. Well if any of that happens panel we'll ask you about it on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me Thank you Bill Curtis, thanks also to Brian Babylon Carla Bouncewell and Roxanne Roberts Thanks to our fabulous audience here at the Studebaker Theatre in beautiful downtown Chicago, Illinois Thanks to all of you for listening wherever you may be I'm Peter Sagal, we'll see you next week

48:03This is NPR.