In short
Modern parenting guidance from Jo Frost (“Supernanny”), covering screen time, discipline/timeouts, spanking, parenting conversations, and differences in parenting context between the UK and US.
Guests
Jo Frost, British parenting expert known for TV “Supernanny.” Paul (host) and his wife are referenced as having used timeouts and now having a 15-year-old.
Key claims
Parents must take ownership of screen time; putting phones in very young children’s hands can “prohibit development.” Timeouts aren’t abandonment if done calmly and nearby; use a warning first and align body language with words for “calm authority.” Spanking should be banned (noting Scotland/Wales bans and pushing UK legislation). Hard conversations and intentionality between partners/with kids are essential.
Notable examples
“Suggestion box” reframed as “questions”; children allowed to cry/unhappy; “timeout step/mat/space” near parent; “warning at eye level”; parents fearing kids will be “left out” from social media; US gun violence/racial profiling increasing parental anxiety compared with the UK.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VONavigating Screen Time with Children
0:42 to 2:11
Jo Frost shares insights on managing children's screen time effectively.
“uh we reached out to our community let them know that that you were going to be here and many questions were sent in oh so really you did that so can we can we can we go through some questions.”
The Impact of Screen Time on Development
2:11 to 3:21
Discussing the effects of screen time on child development and behavior.
“But I want to say this, and I think it's going to be discomfort for a lot of families.”
Timeout Techniques and Strategies
3:21 to 4:47
Jo explains effective timeout strategies and emotional connection with children.
The Importance of Communication and Boundaries
4:47 to 6:15
Learn how to set healthy boundaries and communicate effectively with children.
“similar yes they show up very similar and and that's the point that i'm trying to make and i'm old enough and I've been in this industry long enough, this parental game, and I've seen it come around twice.”
Debate on Spanking and Discipline
6:15 to 10:46
Exploring the ethics of spanking and alternative disciplinary methods.
“You know, I think we've got to a point where we've really got to be careful about the language that we're using.”
Debate on Spanking and Discipline
12:20 to 12:32
Exploring the ethics of spanking and alternative disciplinary methods.
“Everything you need to study and play with select Windows 11 PCs.”
Debate on Spanking and Discipline
12:36 to 13:00
Exploring the ethics of spanking and alternative disciplinary methods.
“And now spring's got you looking at pictures of tank tops with hungry eyes.”
Parenting Perspectives Across Countries
13:00 to 14:03
Discussing the differences in discipline approaches between the UK and the US.
“Done hoping it looks anything like the picture when you tear open that envelope?”
The Realities of Parenting in America vs. the UK
14:03 to 18:04
Explore the differences in parenting challenges related to gun violence and racism in the UK compared to the US.
“are just sort of intellectually lazy in finding a negative response to that, right?”
Navigating Daily Stress as a Parent
18:05 to 19:29
Discuss the daily stress parents face in ensuring their children's safety and well-being.
“We need to talk about the decisions we're going to make from here to June.”
Show all 13 chapters
The Importance of Communication in Parenting
19:30 to 20:44
Learn about the necessity of open conversations and intentionality in parent-child relationships.
“And I've always believed that the harder the conversations we're able to have, right, just the higher quality of life we get.”
Preparing for Parenthood: Key Conversations
20:45 to 22:52
Understand the significance of discussing parenting values and expectations before having children.
“Because if you get that right, then your children, they're very forgiving.”
The Courage to Show Up in Parenting
22:53 to 23:55
Emphasize the need for courage and the rewards of engaging in difficult conversations about parenting.
“The through is have the courage to show up.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Jo Frost:So good, so good, so good. Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom Rack Stores now and up to 60 % off. Stock up and save on the brands you love like Vince, Sam Edelman, Frame and Free People. Join the Nordiclub to unlock exclusive discounts, shop new arrivals first and more. Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite rack store for free. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack. Welcome to We're Talking. In this episode, Joe Frost, known to millions as Supernanny, joins us for a powerful conversation about modern parenting, discipline, screen time, and the conversations every family needs to have.
0:42Jo Frost:This week, we're talking parenting.
0:57uh we reached out to our community let them know that that you were going to be here and
1:04Jo Frost:many questions were sent in oh so really you did that so can we can we can we go through some questions.
1:12Paul C. Brunson:Absolutely. All right.
1:13Jo Frost:So now I want to ask you if you know what this is right here.
1:18Paul C. Brunson:Your suggestion box. Oh, for the kids.
1:23Jo Frost:All right. So, so, so, so this, this is, this is your idea. So if you can to tell everyone what's the importance of a suggestion box.
1:33Paul C. Brunson:So it gets used in, in different ways, but predominantly, um, it was to bring to bring children to a place that felt it difficult to articulate emotionally what they needed from their families. Okay. An opportunity to write that down.
1:53Jo Frost:I see. So what we've done is somewhat of that. What we've done is these are not suggestions, but questions. Okay. But they have all gone into the box. First question is, what's your advice on navigating screen time with children?
2:10Paul C. Brunson:I know that we have to hold a standard and hopefully, as we speak, laws that change that so that we hold big tech and companies responsible. But I want to say this, and I think it's going to be discomfort for a lot of families. Parents have got to take ownership of that. They have to. Meaning we can't just say, oh, well, our child's using the screen. You know, that's what they do now. Paul, I'm watching six-month-old babies holding phones.
2:44Jo Frost:Yeah, restaurants all the time. You see it all the time.
2:47Paul C. Brunson:I would encourage and suggest strongly to so many parents to understand that when you choose to put a phone in your six-month, nine-month, two-year-old's hands, what you are doing is prohibiting their development. You are. and that's not to take away the fact that parents need a break but what do you think parents were doing before 2010 it's okay for children to cry it's okay for children to be unhappy it's okay for children to behave the way they did their children you know I I strongly want to encourage parents to recognize that a lot of damage is being done you know so so how are we going to look at how we limit screen time right with algorithms and safety safeguarding and also recognizing that these shows are made differently right they they design differently flick flick flick flick flick like vegas ping ping ping ping right and how are we going to look as a family when they're appropriate to use how long we use them for and the dialogue that we're going to have before we give consent for our children to have them and most parents will say to me i don't want my kids to get left out i'm worried about my children being left out you know and that cannot be that cannot be the excuse of why then we throw our children into rooms we would never if they were just out on the street because we're leaving our children under protected and yet in the real life we're being overprotective like trust me my kids wouldn't have had any social media until they're at least 17 i would do it how can somebody clearly distinguish whether this child has adhd due to the fact that it may be genetic or environmental factors because they show up very similar yes they show up very similar and and that's the point that i'm trying to make and i'm old enough and I've been in this industry long enough, this parental game, and I've seen it come around twice.
5:05Paul C. Brunson:I've seen, this is the second time I've seen it come around now. Goodness, goodness. Where we had, you know, where we had parenting that was very strict and then very lenient and soft and then coming strict and now soft again. You know, timeouts were demonised. You know, I modified the 1900s timeouts.
5:30Jo Frost:Yes.
5:30Paul C. Brunson:You know, nothing like that. But again, blanket social medias, timeouts were demonized.
5:39Jo Frost:And your modification on the timeout, is that the step? Yeah. Yes.
5:45Paul C. Brunson:Or a space. Or a space. You know, at the time when you saw Supernanny, it was put on a step, right? It was a step or a mat or it could be if you were in a living room, it might have just been that chair, you know? To reset. But again, the blanket message went out there as, oh, it's abandoning. That's not abandonment. Being in the same room and three feet away, there's a space there for a child to sit there and you're here. That's not abandonment. You know, I think we've got to a point where we've really got to be careful about the language that we're using.
6:20Jo Frost:Oh, yeah, it's extreme. You know, so in disclosure for myself and my wife, we used timeouts, or should I say we used. We have a 15-year-old now, no more timeouts. But we used them profusely. We used them and found them to be very effective.
6:42Paul C. Brunson:Because you were emotionally intelligent with your children too. And you see, if you are a parent who is not yin and yang, right? So my methods, you know, call it the frost method, right? Okay. The frost method is to be able to emotionally connect with your child, but to be grounded in your communication so that you can instill healthy boundaries to reset the circumstance at the time. You cannot keep thinking to yourself, oh, I'm going to do a timeout. I'm going to keep doing a timeout to control the child to get them to do something. A timeout will not teach a child how to use a knife and fork properly.
7:26Paul C. Brunson:Practice will.
7:27Jo Frost:So what are the steps to an effective timeout?
7:34Paul C. Brunson:The steps to an effective timeout is to recognize, first and foremost, your values your family values understanding what's a deal breaker for you so know your values first what's acceptable what isn't okay as parents raising your children and teach your children the importance of connecting in understanding what it looks like to be kind to another human being what it looks like to have manners and etiquette and sit at a table, to be considerate of friends when they come around to play. Connect with your kid first, with your child first, teach them. And then when you see the behaviour that's been crossed, the rule that's been broken, because boundaries are about us, right?
8:33Paul C. Brunson:You uphold your boundary. And upholding that boundary may look like this is unacceptable, this is not OK. And at this moment, you know, we're going to be doing a timeout. So I always teach families to give a child a warning first, right, because it allows a child to make a decision. Now, some parents will say and some experts will argue, well, they don't really know. They don't know how to make that decision. But I think we underestimate children greatly. because I know children that exactly know how to get what they want because they've been taught by their parents. Yes. Right? Yes. And they're young.
9:12Jo Frost:Yes.
9:12Paul C. Brunson:And they're young.
9:13Jo Frost:Yes.
9:14Paul C. Brunson:Right? And then, oh, my child, they just can't sit down for five minutes. Have you ever watched a child sit down five minutes for a chocolate lolly?
9:20Jo Frost:All the time. Right. All the time.
9:23Paul C. Brunson:You know, like we underestimate children. So the steps are a warning, calmly, right, at eye level. And we let go. We let go of that. We've said to them, we don't want you climbing on the tops of the counters of the kitchen. It's dangerous. You need to get down. You need to stop doing that. OK, that's enough.
9:42Jo Frost:And Joe, why is eye level important?
9:44Paul C. Brunson:Because I believe the body language speaks more so than sometimes what we're saying. So I want alignment. I want what you say to align with how your body is. So the importance of body language and the integrity of your word must be in alignment. What I want children to feel is the sense of calm authority because we're there to guide our children.
10:08Jo Frost:Okay. Okay.
10:09Paul C. Brunson:You know, I want them to sense that like, oh, you know, mommy said I can't do that.
10:16Jo Frost:Okay.
10:16Paul C. Brunson:You know, in the same way, well, she said I could do that. The integrity of your word.
10:20Jo Frost:Just on that note too is because you talked about the importance of your child always feeling safe in your presence. Something that I'm hoping that this goes away as quickly as possible, but it still seems that it exists in many places of the world, is spankings, beatings, slabbing, etc. Yes, I'd like it to be banned.
10:47Paul C. Brunson:It is banned in other countries, Scotland and Wales and other places in the world. I would like the UK to ban spanking, smacking children. They may be 18 months, two years. They are a whole human being. If we did that to another adult, there would be severe consequences for doing so. And so why are we in a space where we're even having a discussion about a parent who has the privilege to raise another human in this world to hit, to hit them? That's about compliance and control. We already know. We know the evidence out there. We've got the science out there. We know enough of the damage that that can cause in the relationship.
11:34Paul C. Brunson:I would love to see that law changed in Parliament. And I do know that there has been action last year with respects to that coming up in the Houses of Commons. and in parliament about banning that. And I would like to see that continue. Yes. So we get to a place of that.
11:57Jo Frost:I'm right with you. I'm right with you. All right. Next question is, what do you say to the people who question you giving parenting advice when you do not have children?
Read the full transcript
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12:40Paul C. Brunson:Girl, winter is so last season. And now spring's got you looking at pictures of tank tops with hungry eyes. Your algorithm is feeding you cut-offs. You're thirsty for the sun on your shoulders. That perfect hang-on-the-patio sundress. Those sandals you can wear all day and all night. And you've had enough of shopping from your couch. Done hoping it looks anything like the picture when you tear open that envelope? It's time for a little in-person spring treat. It's time for a trip to Ross. Work your magic. I don't... well... Does a doctor need to have cancer to treat cancer? You know, again, it's a very sort of egotistical standpoint that you have to give birth to a child to be able to have any say in what is good for another human being and how they are raised, you know.
13:42Paul C. Brunson:What does that say for those that adopt children in the world? for those that have you know haven't biologically given birth you know what what does it say about those those parents yes so you know again they're entitled to their opinion um but i i see it more as defense i you know i see it more as sort of talking and becoming a mirror and then people are just sort of intellectually lazy in finding a negative response to that, right?
14:16Jo Frost:Yes. I think we have two more. That's it. Okay. Oh, this is a great one. What is the difference between discipline in the UK versus the US? So a lot of people will say, Paul, why are you in the UK? Like, you know, I always get this. Why are you in the UK? Where we lived in the United States, we did not know if our child would come back home alive. There was an open question mark if they were to go out, would they be able to come back, right? Absolutely. Specifically as a result of gun violence, right? This was a question that we had. And then you add on to that racism with gun violence. And that increases the likelihood specifically of my black child.
15:06Paul C. Brunson:Correct.
15:06Jo Frost:Not coming back home. Correct. And then we get to the UK and yes, the UK has lots of problems.
15:13Paul C. Brunson:Yes.
15:14Jo Frost:But that specific problem was not at the same level, not at the same magnitude. And it became not even a question for us at that moment in time.
15:26Paul C. Brunson:And I don't think it would be for me at all. you know because I've watched I've watched my husband be profiled spread eagle you know in a nice part of America right I say nice part right because that's what I say it was a nice part of America and then you realise what they're talking about is you know a part of America where there's hardly any black people living right you know just I just want to keep it real here Paul yes you know Living in this country right now in America is extremely difficult and extremely frustrating. But this, you know, this, this conversation is a difficult conversation because it was only several days ago that there was a woman shot.
16:21Paul C. Brunson:She's a mother.
16:23Jo Frost:She's a mother. Absolutely. You know what? I'm so glad that you're talking about this because I think if you are not someone who loves children, if you're not someone who's aware of children, this probably doesn't hit your radar. But you know that there is not one morning when this is in London, right, where my children are going off to school where I'm not consciously aware, where I feel my stress level elevated just in the process of them going to their bus and then ensuring that they're at school. and in the moment that they I I get that text that they're at school stress level drops I can now really go about my day but then on their way back it's stress stress level goes up yeah can they get back to the house they're back at the house stress level goes right and that's every
17:13Paul C. Brunson:day every day every day every day and in the UK you know as in America because again there used to be that moment maybe 20 years ago you'd go oh it's a little bit behind and then it's going to catch up but now with social media one thing goes out the whole world you know sees it and that's that that has been a very good thing right because it's been able to show a lot of negative and some justice that needed to be taking place or justice that isn't being taken place right however it doesn't diminish the fact that we have parents living in both countries with an enormous amount of anxiety and that just man that punishes the body it takes the toll it takes its toll on the body you know over time you you think oh it's okay you know and then over time over time it just chips away and that chips away at the decisions you make and the amount of energy that you have and you know the projection then on your family you know it's difficult for families it's really difficult for families and at a time but it's really difficult for families I'm asking families to dig deeper to dig deeper and go am I just gonna watch this all pass or am I going to take my family and put it on the map and go these are the decisions we're making for 2026 we need to talk and we need to talk we need to talk we need to sit around the table you and I We need to talk about our kids.
18:45Paul C. Brunson:We need to talk about the decisions we're going to make from here to June. We need to talk about what we're going to do to make sure that actually we are close as a family, but we've also got our own space. We need to offload ourself. We need to be in a space with our partners where we can just be vulnerable. You know, I love the idea of this, but I'm fucking petrified. You know, and I will fight too for now for our family. But boy, it scares me. I hear you. Like, I hear you. Yes. It's all right to feel scared because I feel the same way as well. What are we going to do about it, babes? What are we going to do about it?
19:24Paul C. Brunson:What will we do about it together? Yes. Like, let's talk about this. You have to talk.
19:29Jo Frost:Yes.
19:29Paul C. Brunson:You have to talk. Yeah.
19:31Jo Frost:It's truly where it begins and ends. It really is. Is in the conversation. And I've always believed that the harder the conversations we're able to have, right, just the higher quality of life we get.
19:44Paul C. Brunson:We have to have those conversations. Not all of us know what to say. I don't know all the time what to say. Sometimes I stumble, you know, and I'm well versed with communication. Yes. You know, and the levels of what that means. But, you know, sometimes we can't find words for the depth of what our heart feels at times. Sometimes we just can't. but is the energy there that that other person can feel that is the intention true is it genuine is it loving because if it is whatever's going to be said we know it was coming from a good place yes because people generally want to do good yes they do want to do good yes they might have not said the right thing and we're very we can be forgiving you know to our true friends and i know they're the best interest at heart you know they love us a bit but you know they meant well the
20:40Jo Frost:The intention, intentionality is everything. It is. And it's interesting because in the romantic relationship space, it's always about intentionality. Same thing with parenting.
20:49Paul C. Brunson:It is.
20:50Jo Frost:Same thing with parenting.
20:51Paul C. Brunson:Because if you get that right, then your children, they're very forgiving. Look how many times parents screw up unconditionally, your children. Hi.
21:01Jo Frost:Yeah. Still there.
21:03Paul C. Brunson:Like, all right, dad. Still there. You know, but can you say, can you apologize? Can you apologize to your children? can you turn around and say you know what i just i just lost it right and i'm sorry and i'm so sorry
21:16Jo Frost:yes like do you know what i lost my call you know what's uh what's really resonating with me is as i'm reflecting on the conversation we had is for those new parents for those who haven't yet had the child but are pregnant thinking about the child just had the child right this is going to be so so valuable for you know i've um i've literally i've had that like i've had you know
21:39Paul C. Brunson:i remember i was in chicago airport and a couple came up to me and they went oh my god we watch your shows we watch our shows all the time you're like i just look i just got engaged like we watch your show we're gonna have children we're gonna have children like what would you what advice would you give us and i'm like well first and foremost congratulations right right talk all i will say to you right now in this stage talk to each other talk to each other about how you were raised what you loved about it what you didn't love about it you know how you want to raise your own children what's important to you what do those values look like like you work in this relationship department paul like you know how much time and effort and talking when you're dating someone like you're all there you're taking them out you're on the you put down the phone no you put down the phone no you put down the phone i can't put down the phone no you put down the phone and And, you know, you're like all hyped up and you're talking and you go out for dinner.
22:34And then like marriage happens.
22:36Paul C. Brunson:And then crickets, like crickets, like everything stops. And you're like, how? Yes. Right. But you have to also. Because, again, I'm putting in the decades of seeing this. you have to also realize that there has been media that has also conditioned that's changing now women like you would see in magazines oh this is how you capture the man of your dreams and this is how you you know don't ask him about how many children he may want or don't ask him you know about this and you're like no ask because if you're sitting in front of somebody that can't answer those questions or is offended by those questions thank you very much that was really nice goodbye thank you very much i think i'm going a second date now you know i mean to to to to the
23:29Jo Frost:point of even when you were talking about um uh you know you're talking about the importance of that emotional connection is like you have to talk you know you talked about uh we need to talk right what do we need to do in 2020 it's like this is the this is this is the through the through is in the conversation. The through is have the courage to show up. And when you show up, you will be rewarded. Always. You will be rewarded 100 % of the time. And if you want to hear the full unfiltered stories from today's guest, you can check them out on the We Need to Talk page. Drop a like, leave a comment, and hit subscribe.
24:07Jo Frost:See you next week.
24:25Jo Frost:Turn it up. Storm has zero sugar and 200 milligrams of caffeine. So you can turn that workout up a notch. Good energy in, good energy out. Energy for life.
From the publisher
Jo Frost, known to millions as Supernanny, joins us for an honest conversation about modern parenting, discipline, screen time and the pressure families are carrying today. Jo reflects on why children need boundaries as much as love, why parents must take responsibility for the devices they put in their children’s hands, and how discipline can be firm without becoming fear-based.
She speaks openly about timeouts, smacking, emotional safety, social media, racism, gun violence and the anxiety many parents feel trying to raise children in an increasingly complicated world. Jo also shares why the most important work starts with conversation: between parents, partners and children.
We’re Talking Parenting
(00:00) Intro
(00:35) Paul Asks Jo Questions from the Suggestion Box
(01:39) Jo's Thoughts on Navigating Screen Time with Children
(05:12) The Philosophy Behind the 'Naughty Step'
(09:56) Paul and Jo's Thoughts on Spanking
(11:34) What Would Jo Like to Say to the Supernanny Haters?
(12:53) What is the Difference Between Discipline in the UK Versus the US?
(17:11) Paul and Jo Discuss the Importance of Talking with Your Partner About Parenting
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