South Africa Sessions: Staring Down Death Twice in One Week ft. Khaya Dlanga

27:50so there were so there were those ones and then there was the stickers on the windows that gave you general etiquette there was another one about speaking loud I know I don't remember there was a sticker there was also a music one yes but like but you can't request Yes, don't request music. Don't request music. Because there were some people who tell the taxi driver and say, oh, can you play this song? Yeah, no. It's like, listen, I'm not a DJ. I'm a driver. There were a lot of them. Simi, can you look them up and see if you can find any? The exit one at the back, no one has ever used that emergency exit.

28:28Okay, but you tell me, because I used to look at this all the time as a kid. You tell me, who, that thing says kick. My man, look how I'm sitting now. And you're sitting This is more space Than I've ever had In the back seat of a taxi Fact Okay Fact Now And where your head is Is where the emergency exit The window starts Now you tell me Yeah In what world Some shit goes down So now we're in the taxi We're there

28:59Now I'm there Ah We can't get out the front Hey Go out the back side Hey Pumange emergency exit Kick here there's no hammer there's no they didn't give you anything they said kick here guys not punch not header not push it said kick here who my man what gently life am I living that I'm gonna kick this window guys the seat was here also now that you say that the seat was here this kicking thing why is it that when there's a kayak student shoes are everywhere Eh This is a good question I was in during a car accident Even if you get bumped by a car Yeah shoes But thoughts are on Shoes are always like Yeah shoes leave the chat first Yeah Why I've never done that I think it's because Maybe as people When we're in like a very very Whenever humans are in a situation Our feet get small No Whenever humans are in like a very like Exciting stressful situation I think our feet like do things I'm telling you Every accident nigga There's shoes everywhere.

30:07Stroom. Yes. I've always wanted to use that word. You used it correctly. Stroom everywhere. All sorts. Shoes. You're not wrong. Shoes with no socks. You're not wrong. Why? And I'm saying and I'm saying it's because I'm saying it's because like you do like a there's like a thing that you do. They just don't tie their shoelaces properly. My man, why are you blaming them now? No, it's the shoelaces. So you think every time people are just running around without tied shoelaces? I think so. I really think people are not getting their proper shoelaces. It makes no sense. Wait, if it was one type of shoe that just flies out.

30:44Eugene is completely correct. Pella, there you see flip-flops, you see pumps, you see boots. No, Eugene's not lying. Yeah, but remember, whenever you're stressed, your toes curl. The shoes are either too big? No, no, no. So you're saying accidents expose your shoe gain. No, but remember this, whenever you are tense, your toes do that turbo holding onto your shoes. Yeah. In an accident, high impact. Yeah. Your toes are already doing that automatically. That's your, that's your butt clinch for your feet. Like this thing for your toes. I'm trying to think. Is butt clinch for your, you understand what I'm saying?

31:21But maybe that action pulls the foot out of the shoe. No, but if my shoes are too big and I do this, my shoes stay. Yeah, it's a difficult one. I don't know. I mean, my mom used to tell me that all the time. No, she'd say like, that's why you must make sure you wear socks that have no holes and clean underwear. Then she's like, because if you get bumped by a car, those are the two things that are going to show. Your underwear, right? Then I was like, mom, what are you telling me here? Then she said, in an accident, I'm not even joking, she'd say in an accident, in an accident she'd say, everyone's going to see your socks because your shoes come off.

31:54And then she was like, and everyone's going to see your underwear. Because that's another thing. When you get hit by a car, for some reason, your pants have always come here. And then your ass is exposed. It's true though. Have you ever been hit by a car? No, Jesus. Have you? No. Have you? No, no, never. I've been hit by a car. In a bike accident, yes. Motorbike? Yeah, yeah. When was this? Wait, you're riding? Two years ago, a day after my birthday. You're lying. You didn't tell me. He was embarrassed. When that rough money comes in, my man, there will be signs.

32:28Road accident fun. There will be signs, Kaya. Wait. Are you being serious? Yes. How did it happen? Can we first deal with this one? Yeah. Okay, we'll come back to it. I think I was embarrassed. No, no, no. It was a... Oh, okay. You want to know what happened? No, really. Yeah. So I was writing... Dude, we've written for years. You've never told me that story. Oh, we wrote for years, I should say. Yeah. Because, you know, also, you never tell these things because...

32:55All praise to the almighty Allah. If it wasn't for him.

33:04what happened bro so I rode out normal day in the afternoon came out see that went at the back behind this place yeah see that road where yeah yeah yeah went so I'm like oh it's clear I can go so it's two lanes going this way two lanes going that way yeah you know if there's one thing about squatter camps and informal settlement it's called informal for a reason okay I see okay yeah for many years I've been defending you from informal there's nothing formal about what that person did yeah there was no robot there was no stop sign there was nothing came out of that school it's a teacher came out oh no in a red Haval SUV oh no so I've already passed her on took the right turn so I'm like no I'm fine so I'm like meep meep so I'm like 120 I'm like but I'm clear I can see far as far as I could because I'm going yeah ducked in everything you know when you tucked in everything this car comes out of nowhere goes on the road on the lane that I'm coming on no but came fast and then stopped in the middle of the road because she's trying to go the opposite direction so the car's coming this way she waited for them the other side of the two lane then in that situation there's only two things you can there's two things involved there are two things involved.

34:34So wait, so then the car flies out. So the car pulls up. Yeah. Then I'm thinking this person's gonna stop. So I'm on this far right lane, right in the middle of between the two borders. Oh my goodness. So I swerve to the right, left, thinking that they're obviously gonna, I'm making space. So they slam the brakes because there's a truck coming this way. Oh my goodness. So there I'm like, because you know, if you, if you lock the rear brake, the front becomes light. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you, so you must trail brake basically. So you must hit the front. Yeah, and then... So hope, hope, hope, hope, hope, hope, hope, hope, hope, hope.

35:06So I'm hoping, hoping, hoping. But everything is happening in slow motion. Angels were there. My grandfather was there. Everyone I knew and loved was there. All singing. I was like, guys, why are you guys singing the same language? My cool is in Gomezimna and Dla Bang Welkaama. Smell my breath inside the helmet. I knew it was... But then I knew I was still alive when I could smell my... Because I was like, if I'm dead, you know I can't get any breath. Wait, that was the next thing you experienced? No, I'm lying about that part. Everything was just in slow motion. Yeah. Because I'm like... And then...

35:44Head on. T-bone the car. So you T-bone the car? T-bone and I fly over. Somersault one. Somersault two. Damn. Land on my head. On my back. Pass out. Now I'm on the side of oncoming traffic. So I can't hear the... But there's guys telling, you know, that's why I'll never support informal small businesses again.

36:16No.

36:19Oh my God. Ah, your beef. Kaya. Your beef. I'm going to take some coffee. I'm going to lose it. They were minding their table. Never mind me. I was lying on hot tar. This is the 16th of November. Two days after my... A day after my birth. 16th of November. I'm lying in a hot tar. These guys were minding their business. So finally, I come to inside my helmet. I'm like, oh, what's going on? Then I'm like, why am I looking at the sky? Why am I hot here? I get up. Bike is T-boned to the car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The driver's side. Oh, the bike is in the car. Yeah, it went in Pelangit went Yeah The driver's out Came out She came out On the other side Now she's towering over me As a teacher And you know She's wearing those Teacher skirts She's asking me questions About what was I thinking

37:12And then she asked me I don't have time to think now Yeah, she asked me What were you thinking And I'm like I don't know who you are I don't know what's going on And why is my bed so hard Kanti An accident had happened Wow Damn, bro So I look around I'm finally going Okay, let me do check Because I need to know the rules. You must first check if your neck is fine. Because you can cause more damage. So I try to move my feet first. And I'm like, okay, feet can move. I'm like, hands can move. Then I'm like, okay, I'm going to try to twist my back without turning my neck. Twist my back, twist my back.

37:40I'm like, I'm grand. Then I get up. Undertaker style. Yeah. Then where I am versus where the bike is, maybe there where the tables are. That's where the bike is and the car. So I went all the way opposite direction of oncoming traffic. I get up. Then I'm all good again Where were your shoes?

38:09Clems one

38:16Yo dude I'm glad you're okay though Yeah I'm also glad I'm okay So it's the helmet that obviously helped you as well I think it was God I think it was the fall Because you hit your head first. Yeah, but hit... The helmet. Yeah. Quank! And then... You're also wearing jackets. Yeah, jackets and everything. But those things are not helpful. The thing is, if you break or fall properly on a bike, you survive. That's true. So mostly with motorbike accidents, people don't get killed by the fall. They get killed by cars running over them after the fall. They say you don't get killed by the accident. You get killed by what happens after the accident.

38:50Like hitting the wall or hitting another car or hitting something. Or cars running over you After you fall in Oh my gosh So I survived I got up And then two days later I was going to a shoot I was in the back of an Uber Relaxing Minding my business Wah-bah-bah Huh? The car was rammed at the back No I flew I hit the drivers You're lying I don't want to laugh But you're like Are you serious? No, I don't Are you serious? Yo, bro Are you serious? And Kai, you know how Production managers care about the shoot only I'm like, guys I made an accident You're like, yeah So we are fig I mind you No, you're lying you're telling me no oh my goodness a week later I was like no I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine then I can feel numbness on my back numbness on my back I'm like no I'm not fine went for a scan they were like oh I've got an acute pinched nerve what happened here it was the accident and then the multiplied by the being rammed from the back who lied in two days if you if you were telling this to your American friends they'd be like man Eugene you were super unlucky if you're telling it to your African friends they'd be like, somebody was trying to kill you.

39:56There is some witchcraft somewhere in the world and somebody was trying to kill you. I hope you prayed after that. No, I prayed. I was like, there's no way you survive something like that and you think everything is normal. Don't press anything. We've got more What Now after this. The reason your life flashes before your eyes, before you die, is because your brain is searching for any memory that could save you from this moment. Whole Foods Market is known for great food, but what really stands out is how much they do before anything gets to your cart. Since opening in 1980, they have helped lead the way with their strong commitment to quality standards that give shoppers more peace of mind and ultimately result in food that's more delicious.

40:45At Whole Foods Market, more than 575 ingredients have been banned from all food, plus body care, supplements, and cleaning products. That means no artificial sweeteners like sucralose, no artificial colors like red number 40, no hydrogenated fats, no high fructose corn syrup, and no bleached or bromated flowers. These standards are enforced across all departments, from thousands of organic product options to meat with no added growth hormones or antibiotics and seafood that is responsibly farmed or sustainably wild-caught. There's also no synthetic nitrates or nitrates in their sliced deli meats, hot dogs, or sausages.

41:27The result is food with less getting in the way of the flavors you actually want. Real food tastes better. Shop Whole Foods Market in-store or online. Hey, Chicagoland. The Wayfair store is in your neighborhood at Edens Plaza in Wilmette. Finally, you can feel the fabric, sit on the sectionals, and even open the refrigerators. Plus, our in-store designers will help you bring it all together with free one-on-one design support for any project on any budget. Yep, we said free. Oh, and did we mention the cafe? So what are you waiting for? Come see all that's in store. Visit the Wayfair store today at Edens Plaza and Wilmette.

42:07Wayfair, every style, every home. Finding the right size rug can be hard. Enter Ernesta, designer-quality, custom-sized rugs cut to the exact size of your room and delivered in as little as two weeks. Not sure of the size or the material? Start with five samples for just$10 today to see them in your own light and match to your decor. Plus, get$50 toward any rug of your choice. Visit Ernesta.com today. That's E-R-N-E-S-T-A dot com.

42:40Which makes me think When you die Do you know it's happening? When you die Do you know you're dying? Or do you know you're dead? Let's say for example Yeah You die in your sleep You see when people say People die peacefully in their sleep Yeah You've slept And you've remembered That you're sleeping When you wake up You're like Yo there was this one time I went to go pee Yeah Yeah When you die while you're asleep Yeah When do you know As a sleeping person that you're dead. You know what? Great person to answer that would have been Jesus. John. He's the only person who came back from the dead. He came back.

43:13You know about that thing. No one ever saw him walking out of there, You're not wrong, Kate. But no one. You're not wrong. No one saw him. It would have been great if people were just a little more curious about those kinds of things. Just tell me, Chep. No, dude, so what? No, no. Good to have you back. Yeah. Really good to have you back. That was crazy. Yes, because... Judas. Yo. I mean, yo I mean, we knew he was sus But damn, bro Damn, wow, Judas But listen, I have a question Like right afterwards Where are you? Like where were you for those three days? How does it feel? So when he died, like How did it feel?

43:53Like how did you know? My friend Eugene wants to know Yeah, because here's how I think You know, I heard something the other day I don't know where it was It was really fun and fascinating Might have been in an anime I was watching Or something But they were like The reason your life flashes before your eyes Before you die Is because your brain is searching For any memory That could save you from this moment Oh, you're scrolling through your archives Like literally That is your final survival instinct So just before you die Your body's like Everything going like Wait, wait, wait Is there a way to escape this?

44:28Is there something I've learned somewhere in my life that can help me escape this. It was just a hypothesis and I liked it. So me, there's two things that happen. Yeah. I go to the bathroom at night and then also my nose gets dry. So I usually put like Vaseline in my nose. Okay. That's how I know I'm still alive. Okay.

44:51I'm like... Kaya, the day... Yo, what? The day my nose feels moisturized throughout the night. I don't need to put Vaseline to make sure... This is your... I didn't go pee. This is your... This is his... What's it called again? Ah, man. This is your inception. Yes. This is your inception. That's your totem. Yes. Eugene is like, when my nose is not dry... Yeah, I'll know. I'll know. This is not reality. Even on a flight, I'm like, ahaha. Then I'm like, yes, this is sharp. Because the day, the day throughout the night, fully moisturized No dry You know that dry part Of the back of your sinus Yeah yeah yeah You know that dry part I know exactly which part You'll know you've moved on Yeah I'll know The day I'm breathing easy I'm moisturized Man you know what would be so funny To do to Eugene To prank him To prank him We We find where he's sleeping We hide humidifiers Extra humidifiers We make him sleep Through the whole night Moisturized Then he wakes up the next day Being like Ah I guess I'm dead And then we He just moves through the world You see Eugene running naked He can't see me

46:06You just came back from a funeral didn't you Yes yes in Switzerland How was it I said like it was a gig Sorry It was fantastic I didn't mean it like that I didn't mean it like that at all What a great You know black people say What else could you have done No but that's what I mean So it's hard to ask it in English That's true I know what you mean Because how was it Is the correct translation Yes But if you say it in Vanek If you say like in Zulu If you go like Benjan Or like Begenjan Begenjan Like you would go Yeah It's more like How did it unfold How did it turn out to be You know As opposed to like How was it Because what you say is like Usually people say like Simbekiile Which we have put him Yes Or her Direct translation Yes Right But actually Because I've never been to a funeral service like that in my entire life.

47:00Why? What was different? Because a swatini. There was a DJ. If he, if he, if he, if he. Come on, if you're ready to see this casket going to the ground, let me hear you make some noise. If he, if he, if he, if he, if he, if he, if he. If he ain't going nowhere. If he is, he ain't going nowhere. But he is though. Yeah. Sorry, so what was different? So the funeral service is there. You have to be buried before sunrise, before the sun rises. Or like in Limpopo. And not only that, so which meant that it's supposed to be like at four in the morning. Okay. Right. And it's like an hour, right? The service.

47:47The service. The service, you know, arrived. Very efficient. Very efficient. Only the people spoke was someone read the obituary. Okay. And there was a family member who spoke. Yeah. Umfundisi. That was it. Walked out. Went to the graveyard. And an hour done. I'm not mad at that. I mean, I was very, I was, and I was thinking, we were having breakfast like at eight. But breakfast, full on. You were having day time food. Yeah, we were having day time food. Daytime funeral food for breakfast. Yes, that's what we're having. Which was a bit, I was like, oh, this is very unusual. You know what Kai was like?

48:30Yeah. Because that's one of those weird situations where you've got to be like, guys, guys, guys, you're killing me here. Wait, sorry. Let me rephrase. What I mean is I can't live like this. Sorry, let me rephrase. Guys, what I mean? Oh, hey. It was very interesting. And I remember thinking, I was like, guys, in the Eastern Cape, we're already having breakfast. It would not have started. The funeral room started by So did you prefer it? Or did you How did you I did not You know like You know May my friend rest in peace I didn't appreciate Waking up so early I was like That's the least you can do for him I was like Hey I was like Wake up But they accommodated I think People from out of town They actually made the service At 6 Rather than 4 o 'clock Just for that Yeah just for that But otherwise I mean, I did appreciate how quickly everything happened.

49:27Because when I think about hours, like back in the Eastern Cape or Eastern N, they go on forever. Like for a long, long time. So you see, I'm torn on that. Because I think both have their merits. So I think a short and efficient funeral is great if you're not particularly close to the person. Ah. Right. but like I remember from my grandmother's funeral it was weird because I watched my grandmother's funeral online because it was during COVID right so I couldn't travel for it and then were the comments open? if they were it would have been amazing actually that would have been amazing because I would have been there in the comments R.I.P.

50:09GG doing it no who's that in row 3 yo my man should also be in a box soon man no I there actually wasn't so but I had to watch it It was a very surreal experience That is weird It's the most surreal experience I've ever had Because I was watching people I know And my family But in a On a screen At home Yes Because you're at home watching Yeah So I'm watching them and I'm like You know But what I noticed was Because it was long It was like four hours maybe Yeah Four hour service Did you make snacks in between Yeah I took breaks I was That was the part that I did enjoy How did you time when to go pee make a sandwich when who was talking or what was probably the thing because you can come back no singing actually Kaya's right singing is an easy one because what would happen is people would speak you know like my grandmother's friends would come people but then in the middle of while they're speaking the person would start singing yes you know so they'd start a song yeah they'd be like ah you know when I met Francis we were this old and we lived together and this was our time and the first time she helped me and this is how we knew each other and what, what, what, what.

51:19You know what I mean? And then the person would stop and they'd be like,

51:24and then they'd start singing. Then I'd be like, oh, now you can go, because I can go do something and I can hear what's happening in the background. Great. Some of the songs I like stayed for. No, some of them I've, like the ones that I knew. Oh, you had hits there. So the ones that I knew, no, the ones that I knew were my grand's favorites that I had known. Then I would sing those, you know what I mean? Ma sang wovulega.

52:01You stuck around for that one.

52:06That like fully brought my grand back to me. Does that make sense? So those ones where I was like, ah, Gogo would be here. Because she used to give me that little, maybe Zan. Spam Pam Spam Pam Spam Pam What do you call it? Mkamel Mkamel Yeah Pillow Yeah But it has a name In the sauce Yeah Spam Pam People invented that I like Spam Pam Spam Pam Spam Pam Spam Pam Yeah But it was the leather It was a leather pillow Spam Pam is the person Who's not supposed to sit At the front in a tag So it was a leather pillow That you had to hit Yeah So that everyone could Be on beat together Yeah And it had like a satisfying The church metronome Yeah Perfect way to put it It had a beautiful thumping sound to it.

52:46Yeah, like a deep. And as a kid, I used to hit that thing. I would argue that my sense of rhythm is because of that. Makes sense, actually. From a young age. Makes sense. Because you had to keep rhythm for a long time. My friend, it was like. And you can't mess up with that thing. Not only that. Not only that. You had to know how the song is going to go. Because remember, when we're singing these songs, they always start very slow because it has to give everyone time to get into the song. Then they start getting faster and faster. The BPMs go up. Maybe that's why I became a DJ as well. So the BPMs go up, go up, go up, go up.

53:22You know the story's supposed to go. That's why I became a pastor. And then you also have to be like at the end because you know what I mean? Because it goes, it goes, it goes. So when you start, you'll be like, the person starts with no beat first. It'll be like,

53:50Then like the men will come in lower.

54:06You see, you've got to keep this. Jerusalem, masa ngovulegane singene Jerusalem and you go and you'll go. And you control the temple. Yeah, but you have to feel what they're doing. I'm a kid. I'm not controlling this. This is the prayer meeting. I'm not controlling this. This is happening. I have to keep this going. But I have to feel the... No, sometimes there'll be like two, maybe three. But I was the one who was doing this. So I'm there. I'm doing the beat. I have to keep it going. Jerusalem,

54:40What we don't know is the slowdown symbolizes the ending. The worst thing you could do is hit it. Not necessarily the ending, by the way. It could be a break. Yeah, just the lull. The lull. Because the person might just be like,

54:59And so, and as the rhythm came out.

55:16Yo, that's how it was Don't you have homework? Hey, my man Hey, my man You don't know Yo I would be there as a kid watching People's mouths Yeah, because I knew The person who started I'm like Because the first few times They hit me with that job Obviously, I was just beating the thing Then now My mom was like First of all She's like You know what I mean Who did you take the gig from? No from adults So one day You were hanging around They were like Guys Adults used to do that thing Yeah And then I took Ispam pam Which I wasn't supposed to Because remember All the church goodies Were like put away You know The things people would wear The Yeah Yeah the bells Everything was like Put away Yeah the Ark of the Covenant Jesus' shroud All of it All of it All put away Yeah It was all put away The nails from the crucifixion Everything The rock from...

56:05Everything. The rock of Gibraltar. The donkey that Jesus took to... Everything was there. Everything. The presidency test. The other Mary. Everything was at the corner by the room divider. So we have everything. It's literally like that. The specific Bible that we read for that... Was it that leather one? The leather one. So all these things were specific. So it's pam-pam. You are not allowed to just touch it randomly. My gran would be very lenient to me. So I would And then I would just walk around the house Because I was like there's nothing Imagine you're a kid bro You're like a three, four year old You've got a leather pillow That you can hit as hard as you want This is the greatest gift of all time With a strap behind it With a strap You'll never lose it So then Outside of church This is not during church time It's at home So then my grand said My mom would always be like Hey, stop being naughty You know what I mean Put that thing away Then my grand said no Clearly he has a gift encourage this gift of his because this bum bum is a very like it's a very stressful job to have let him you know what I mean but then my mom was like yo bro don't mess around at church wait wait wait this feels like the wait go on clarification

57:25we don't know what you were busy with when Trevor invoked on you you dropped everything you were doing But Like in a church Yeah Why is it that kids Or Have the most difficult jobs They were like in the Catholic church Oh yeah My man that thing can start fires With robes Yeah that's so true And wooden benches Yeah You chose to give To give that gig to a kid Yeah The holding of the wine During the Yes yes yes And the lighting of the candles The lighting of the Yeah Yeah

58:04So, the innocent, pure souls suffer little children to come unto me for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Amen. And forbid them not. So, my gran was like, yo, man, instead of chastising him for doing that thing, let him do it then. So, now every, in fact, that was the reason I now started enjoying Bible service. I was like, because I was like, yo, man, most of the time I'm sitting there waiting for them to finish. Bruh, you're just like, yo, these prayers don't end. And they used to come during cartoon time. My man, I wish it was cartoon time. It wasn't even about cartoon time because it was at my grand's house in Orlando.

58:38We didn't have like a TV in that way. I don't even remember us having a TV. So it was at night. Oh, it was one of those. It was the evening ones where everyone, all the other grannies would come over. I know those. The Thursday ones. And then the ones where not only that, but remember they would all throw shade at each other in the prayers. Do you remember that one? Prayer off. Guys, guys, that was the most, because I remember as a kid be like because what they would do is they would go they would pray they would pray but they would be like oh heavenly father up above then they'd be like oh oh heavenly father we thank you for being here with us you know they do the introductions so my gran would always be like

59:18give the full address and even as a kid I used to be like ow he doesn't know where we are but can I tell you I appreciated the humility because I asked my gran once not to ask you no I asked my gran once I said, God knows everything. Why do you always introduce yourself? And she was like, Trevor, how busy is God? Why do I assume that he knows me? Let me make his job easier. So I was like, damn, it's humility. So she would introduce herself. Then they'd pray. But then I would notice there'd be some grannies in the prayer circle who would throw shade at each other. Because we'd all be praying. Before the prayers, they just talk about life.

59:53How are things? What's happening? And then they'd be like, hey. Hey. You're a virgin.

1:00:02and this week and so everyone would tell stories yes yes then the prayer meeting would start do the prayers read the scriptures so they're donating the trauma but then now when the praying would happen there would always be some grannies what they would do is they'll be praying they'd pray normally then they would just be like and oh my way to you know just heavenly father can we also just pray for eugene's mom you know for the tough time she's had with her son and not not all of us can have a perfect son lord and we just want to pray and say that you know we ask you to give her guidance and power lord so that she can try her best lord try her best and let the rest of us be grateful that we don't have a son like eugene and oh brah and now i'm there like because i want to see i want to see who i'm like brah you'd hear everything who's having an affair who uh stole money from what yeah who stole the stock fell money whose kid is failing in school who can't pay rent who had an affair whose uncle or husband is drunk all the time.

1:01:22Who came home because marriage did not work out. Yeah, exactly. And they would all but they would all like throw it on behalf of the other person as if As if it's a prayer. But I was like ah, this is shade, bro. And then the song would start and that's when I would come in and I would nail it. I killed, bro. I was absolutely phenomenal. My timing, without fail, I would never hit his bum bum after the person is done. And I still judge people who do that till this day. Because sometimes people finish singing and then the person will still go, no, you failed. You must watch them. You must study their rhythm and you have no time because these are strangers.

1:02:02Was it looking at the lips or was it knowing? No, it's a rhythm. It's also learning. It's like in comedy, you learn an audience as well, you know? So you learn. Yeah, they're sort of finishing the laugh now. Now you can carry the, because you don't want to throw in more jokes while they're laughing. they might miss the you get what I'm saying it's innate it's rhythm what happened to the spam-bam though? it's still there at my grandmother's funeral there was some other guy very unqualified very unqualified no one will ever be good enough I'm just going to say very unqualified

1:02:43wait so I think it was like a random person from the church who came with the pasta he was hitting the same spam-bam this bum bum it was their bum bum oh at least yeah no no it wasn't my gran's one that I could see my gran's one was like because you had different ones I also used to judge people's bum bums because sometimes they'd have like a really like my gran's one was top like real leather proper leather brownish red yeah I know that one the brownish red one yeah brownish red and then when she would polish it with something it would go darker yes yeah so she had that one with a beautiful sleeve.

1:03:19Yes. Yeah, so you could slip your hand in nicely on this side of it. The hand didn't, you know what I mean? Full hand coverage. Oh, so it doesn't, the one with that leather strap. No, no, no, no. So the full hand coverage. Okay. Full hand coverage. That is a fancy one. Yeah, it was. It's like, I'm your full sleeve. Full sleeve hand coverage. You were in there nicely. Yeah. All of it was stitched beautifully. Had enough of a border. So, you know, like you could flick, you know the border where the stitching was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, because the cheaper ones, the stitching just goes into the edge of the spum-pum.

1:03:46Yeah, because it wasn't like there was pleather. Yeah, so her one had the full border of leather. Piping, they call it. My man. Yeah, the piping. And when you hit that thing, it had the most satisfying. And then I would go to some other people's houses and stuff. They would have a thinner one. I hope you didn't do that face at people's houses. I did. No, guys, I was a pom-pom snob. If you asked me to do it with the wrong two, I'd be like, this is not... That is so funny. I was like, bro, no. You know, it's so funny. This is not it. You know how you have guitar shops and all of that? I feel like you could have opened a Spum Pum shop.

1:04:19I could have opened a Spum Pum shop. Yeah, I could have been that guy. Yo, bros, a full-on snob when it comes to that. Guys, full-on snob. So you'd go and then you'd be like, ah, where's it? My man. They'd ask me to do it like, because sometimes you'd pray at other people's places and they'd be like, Trevor, do you want a Spum Pum? And I would have already seen it and I'm like, nah, bruh. You'd flat like, ah, no, I can't play this thing. No, I can't. I can't roll like this. Guys, I'm the Jimi Hendrix of Spum Pums. Now you're giving me... I need your hole. I could have. I could have been there.

1:04:49Guys, there's two industries. I think... Yeah, this is Square Garden. We are one of like the oil industry, petrol industry related and then petroleum, jelly, Vaseline byproduct of that situation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hear me out. Yeah, okay. Spam, bam. Yeah. The material, the sound closely linked to the same people that did the upholstery for the taxi seats. It did have a similar sound Guys, those seats It had a similar sound That thing, Pella Those seats You're talking about the original seats Yeah, the original The original The perforated leather With the piping Yeah, yeah, the perforated leather Yeah, kumbul With the sponge If you Burn your ass Yeah, yeah, yeah Like an ass has never been burned before, bro Do you remember?

1:05:32The material is the same Yeah The material is the same Except for when it went leather Not looked after though Not the premium one Not the premium, yeah Premium, there was a total That's the way we said who had that tender somewhere. But the cheap ones that you used to scoff at, derivative from that thing. You are right, actually. It was the same. Why did you never... Yeah, but you drove a taxi. My grand's pom-pom never cracked. Why did taxi never have a headrest on the other passenger seats? What head are you resting? Oh, flip. No, but they took that out, though. It comes with a headrest. All of them?

1:06:08They took those out. Yeah, they used to come with... They took those out. You buy the car and then you gut it. No, the way, so how it came is like, we made our own version of it. Yes. But they came with headrests and I think they still even do. And then you just take that thing out for like a bunch of reasons. First of all, headrests are not facilitating people passing money through. It's easier to pass the money. Your whole job is to do this. It's not a head continental pillow. Hey, my man. It's a headrest. Hey, my man. My man. Yeah, what? Hey, my man. Okay, do this. Do this, Kaya. Do this. Hit the back of you.

1:06:41That's all I need. No, bro. Why is yours covering the whole entire thing? No, bro. Also, like, as a taxi driver, you want to sit like this? Yeah. Now, headrest here is killing me. Because this is the middle seat already. I need this room to stake my claim. This is how I roll. Guys, but we know what headrests are for. Look at me. Yeah, but it doesn't matter to taxi drivers. Look at me. They're not sitting down. See this? This is it. Yeah, bon? Yeah, bon? Yeah. Yeah, bon? This is it, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bon? now now imagine if there's a thing here now I'm this guy nah bro there's no swag here here I'm gonna stop at red lights here

1:07:28see what I'm saying so the difference between being a responsible citizen and an irresponsible one is the risk of whiplash and an impact

1:07:40We've got more What Now after this. Mr. Mandela's like, ah, how are you, Fred? And he's like, Mr. Mandela, I heard the most amazing thing today. Stevie Wonder was doing an interview. Yes. And he said, that song, you know, I just called to say I love you. Yes. He wrote it to you. Hey, Chicagoland, the Wayfair store is in your neighborhood at Edens Plaza in Wilmette. Finally, you can feel the fabric, sit on the sectionals, and even open the refrigerators. Plus, our in-store designers will help you bring it all together with free one-on-one design support for any project on any budget. Yep, we said free.

1:08:17Oh, and did we mention the cafe? So what are you waiting for? Come see all that's in store. Visit the Wayfair store today at Edens Plaza and Wilmette. Wayfair, every style, every home. Finding the right size rug can be hard. Enter Ernesta. Designer-quality, custom-sized rugs cut to the exact size of your room and delivered in as little as two weeks. Not sure of the size or the material? Start with five samples for just$10 today to see them in your own light and match to your decor. Plus, get$50 toward any rug of your choice. Visit Ernesta.com today. That's E-R-N-E-S-T-A dot com. I'm Hannah. I've lost 75 pounds in 20 months with GLP-1s, plus diet and exercise.

1:09:00On Roe, I've gone from struggling to run a mile to running farther every day. You can access FDA-approved GLP-1s online. Get the support you need to reach your weight loss goals. Go to row.co slash weight to see if you qualify. I'm a paid row partner. 20 % average weight loss in one year in non-diabetics with obesity or overweight with a weight-related medical condition versus 3.1 % in placebo arm. Rx only. To stay informed about serious side effects, go to row.co slash safety.

1:09:30Did you find out what the story is behind the shoes? Yeah, I did. Yeah, what is it? It's the violence of the impact. It really hurts the human body. This guy just said it's the violence of the impact. No. But I said that. I did say in the beginning. But there must be. But guys, remember, there must be something about. No, but OK. But OK, let me let me elaborate on what I meant. Yes. Let's go further. The reason I'm saying that is because the the thing. So the reason. No, you must read it. No. No but the reason I'm saying that is because Maybe this is why it makes sense to me Shoes are one of the only things that you wear That only come onto your body from one side Condoms also Even those would come off in an accident That's how baby is amazing I'm willing to bet By accident I'm willing to bet I'm willing to bet Where's your shirt It has your head Both arms And your torso Holding it down Your pants Have both legs Holding it You get what I'm saying Right So I'm just saying It's a lot harder Shoes are the only thing Where Think of like A passionate night Where two people are And you're trying to get into Shoes come off like that Yeah Everything else is like Here we go Yeah You can kick off your shoes There's even the phrase Yo kick off your shoes Yeah You can kick off your shoes Yeah You can't There's nothing else You can't kick off your pants, you're going, there's nothing.

1:11:02Because apparently paramedics, when they reach a scene and they find your toes sticking out, they're like, wait, really? What do you mean? Yeah, because there's no way your shoes, if an impact takes off your shoes, you're not there as a proxy for... Yes. Read it, read it. Read it. Read it on your mic. Shoes come off during severe accidents because extreme physical forces, sudden stopping and violent body movements overcome the hold of the footwear. So this makes complete sense. you know why because if I think about it as well thank you Simi and one of the times when I would also lose my shoes the most is if I would try Spansula dancing read all the descriptions there yeah yeah yeah violent movements say them again extreme physical forces wait wait I'll show you on each one extreme physical forces yeah yeah yeah yes sudden stopping yeah yeah and and violent body movements

1:12:07you laugh but you know what to help people who watch this you must put on a little Spansola video under me while I'm talking and you must show the feet and everything so people can see the violence stopping and the sudden movement and the yeah if your shoes are off It's chai time for you Does a funeral When you're at a funeral Does it make you Start thinking about Your life Like Because you've been to A lot of funerals I feel like Yeah Like it's so funny Like literally Over the last few years It's like I never went to funerals And then And then It's just funerals So It's so funny for me It doesn't make me think About my own mortality I just think about The person who I'm like Oh wow Like I can't be With this person anymore That's beautiful But But maybe I don't think about mortality because I'm like, guys, why?

1:13:01I mean, it's all going to happen at some point. Yeah. And I kind of, but also partly, I think I've said this before, partly maybe the reason I don't think about it anymore is because I thought I was going to die young. Right. And then now I've gone past that age where I thought I was going to die. I was like, ah, okay. What limit did you give yourself? I gave myself a limit Of 41 Really? You thought by 41 it would be curtains? Yes because my father died young at 26 My grandfather died at 41 And I was like okay You had no record of somebody living beyond So in your family There's no pictures of old people From my dad's side Yeah there's no old people Yeah no old people I actually never thought about that Your ancestor looks younger than you currently And you have Nivea It's male figures Yeah that's what I'm saying When people are like Oh that's my grandfather You're like yeah Nigga I was 26 going Damn bro Then people look at you Like you've had a hard life They're like no I've lived twice Their age Yeah That's crazy Which was insane And then I was like Yeah I think But then what I found Interesting was that I remember reading Like a Bill Clinton Autobiography And Bill Clinton Wrote And I was like God damn I have the same fear because his grandfather died young his father died young and he thought I was going to die young that's why he lived like it was his last day and he did then the Oval Office

1:14:32and Winston Churchill same thing he also thought I was going to die young I reserve my rights and I'll incriminate myself depends what guys what do you call again 35th Amendment yeah now I mean guys I'm fucking up I'm fucking up again my best Bill Clinton quote is when he was being I think he had to deposition that's what it was and and then someone asked him a question and Bill Clinton said it depends on what a definition of the word is is I was like gangsta that guy and I was like I've never heard anybody say you know if I borrow Eugene's brain for that I'll say, that is a person who has had a long life of infidelity.

1:15:24If I think of how Eugene would think of it, because I'm like, that's a person who's like, so when you say were, what word do you mean? When you say were. Where? When you say who is she, what do you mean by she? What does the word she mean? Do you mean who is she as a person? Who is she to her family? who ish that's what that sounds like to me so what's beyond Angiti you live your whole life thinking 45 that's it yeah then what's beyond 45 I mean 41 what's beyond that beyond what do you replace that with it's like it's confusion because you I suppose because you'd set this limit I think for yourself and so for example where I was like I'm not gonna have kids because I'm gonna die young right and then I'm not gonna get married because I'm gonna die young right and then now All of a sudden Those things Are like god damn I'm not dead So I have to rethink What I'm gonna do With my life And every loan You've taken out If you were sure You were leaving Kai was a big boss Out there Put it on my loan account It says 36 months Kai was like Put it on Kai was like I'm outie Kai was like How many months To pay Oh yeah 24 month contract I got it And now And now Kaz They're like So guys Let me show you a picture Of my grandfather So this is my grandfather I know what you're thinking I know what you're thinking Nigga I was only using Sunlight bus So I actually didn't know that So a lot of how you planned Or how you were living your life Is because you assumed Is that I mean not why You're so outgoing And so like Gregarious But Damn Sam Gregarious He is though That's what I mean Yeah Oh that's okay Before we carry on, because I want to put gregarious over your head now as you're speaking.

1:17:23Fuck it, Lapo. I'm not going to say that. Oh, that is funny. Gregarious is an adjective that means fond of company, sociable, or tending to live in groups. Does not describe you perfectly? That does describe me well. Perfectly? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Because I confuse gregarious and verbose. Yeah. Simeon's a lap of us. Verbose living.

1:17:54The unnecessary use of additional words and phrases. What is it this? Verbose means using or containing more words than are needed. Okay, scratch that one. Equal up. Gregorius. No but was that like Because you You know more people than anyone I know Maybe Lawrence Maybe but I still think you know more I've never been out to lunch Dinner or in public with Kaya And not had Kaya greeted by somebody Yeah In a very familiar way Like genuinely I remember once we were with somebody who's not from South Africa And they asked us Someone in our friend group but they said they were like is he is he like is he like the mayor or something what does he do like is he is he like is he the mayor because everywhere you go you don't you don't sit down at a restaurant i would say it takes five to ten minutes for you to sit down when you go to a restaurant yeah i would hate to be his partner it's terrible yeah because you get there and then before you sit oh table oh table oh table you know like in the godfather yeah yeah that's how kaya is Damn You kiss babies and everything Everything bro Yeah Yeah Send out my prayers In 10 days No no But it's I don't know It's okay But then again It's that I don't know if it's a personality thing Or that's why But I mean That I think That was partly the reason Actually I think I wrote Books In the beginning Because you thought you were leaving I was like I'm gonna be dead At least I've left something behind You know what's actually beautiful About this Funny enough Is they say And it's I know it's a platitude But they always say Live as if you are going to die And people are always like Of course we're going to It's like no, no, no, no Everyone goes like Oh you're going to die But people don't actually live As if they are going to die And it's interesting that you now say that Because it's like You were living like you were going to die So you're like Let me write books So that I've left something And I've told my stories And I've like You know my family And our histories And our lives You know what I mean It's like this whole vibe so now what's what's changed as eugene says now that you've you've ticked the it like i said now that the the odometer so that it can go further i can go further it's like it went to nine nine nine nine then it clicked back then you're like how back to zero i know it's like the year 2000 yeah can i tell you like it's yeah you're right it's it's been it was for maybe a solid four years where i was a bit where i couldn't find or place myself properly because i was uh but i I didn't figure that out yet.

1:20:38And I think when the penny dropped, was that flip? It's because I thought I was going to die. This is why my life just feels like all over the place. And I haven't really defined the second stage of my life because what I thought was going to happen hasn't happened. And so how do I plan my life now? Because I need to plan my life. And it's almost like I'm starting from zero. and that's what's happening now and I can see that evolution and I think I can feel it in myself and I feel a little bit different I think because of that. Does it bring you relief or does it bring you discomfort? That is a very good question.

1:21:19I think that actually it gives, it's a bit of both and I like the discomfort of wanting to try new things. You know, things that, I mean, for example, there's a thing that I've always said to myself which is like the one thing I know I'll never ever be able to do is to start a business like I don't think that I have the capacity for it I don't think I have the you know the mental aptitude for it but now I'm actually seriously considering like you know doing something like in that sign you know a business that I'd love to you know to be involved in and start in which is completely different from anything I've ever done in my life like completely outside of my scope I love that for you I will say one thing if there's one thing that will kill you it's starting a business I'm just gonna tell you as your friend like yes that man yeah death is such an interesting Eugene and I were were hanging with my mom yesterday and it was so funny she was so annoyed so my mom was devastated and I mean devastated devastated At the news of Dolly Parton's passing.

1:22:31Oh, yes. My mom, she sort of lives in a time capsule. There's the life she lived before finding Christ. And then there's her life in Christ. That period is almost like stasis because it's like the Bible doesn't change. The scripture doesn't change. And she's comfortable in that world. But then there's this world that she still loves and fondly remembers and all of that. So that's when she was listening to secular music. And she was like part of the world. and all those things hold a special place in her heart but let me tell you something people have died and mom will be like oh i heard whoever passed away oh i'm you i can't believe it i can't believe it yeah those vibes those guys this guy you took it there let me tell you something

1:23:18are you shot too high you didn't even start here you went straight to data dude not masatini nothing she was shaken like shaking shaking i can't believe it i get it i get it yeah she was shaken and i've tried to break it down to understand why and i think it's a few reasons because i was talking to her about it and i was like i think she was shaken for let me go i go i think she was shaken by dolly parton's passing one because dolly parton defined An era of my mom's life And you know when an artist Defines an era of your life When they die it sort of makes you feel like That era of your life has died as well Yeah yeah yeah I think her Dying also shook my mom A little bit because I guess She saw her as a peer in age In a way so she's like Before that it's like This is like the person I'm in line with Yeah yeah yeah Then there's the icon of like Oh my goodness Dolly Parton Because some people seem so Larger than life It's almost like the idea of them Dolly Parton becomes ephemeral As opposed to concrete Dolly Parton is an idea Dolly Parton, no one's even like where is she right now It's Dolly Parton Then when you go she's dead It's like wait what do you mean I didn't even know she was alive I thought she was just existing Fully shaken That's actually a good description So now I'm on my way To pick up my mom You know Sunday We're gonna go get lunch The usual thing And now I'm like Oh man Dolly Parton Cause I saw the email My mom sent me in the morning And I was like Oh Let me like play Dolly Parton's greatest hits And cause that's my childhood So now I'm in the car Oh Having the time of my life Busy there Singing there Enjoying myself You know Get to My mom's place She gets in the car She's like She's like turn it off turn it off she's dead then I'm like what yeah that's why I'm playing the music she's like no no no no no and I've never genuinely she's not like that kind of she's like no no please no no no no no no no play

1:25:37play play I called to say I love you please just I called I just called then I was like who because the title didn't come to mind immediately yeah then I was like who she's like the blind guy man the blind guy and I was like Stevie Wonder she's like yeah and I was like damn she's like shaken and then during the day we talked about it and I know my mom is like one person but I also started seeing like the impact that Dolly Parton had on people's lives and people's lives that I don't think anyone could have ever predicted I can see Dolly Parton A country superstar Having an impact on Many parts of America's lives I can see Dolly Parton An American Having an impact on many parts Of American lives You know Regardless of where they live Etc, etc Bruh I really hope Dolly Parton knew That in random parts of Africa And I'm sure other parts of the world There were black people going You are my person Yeah, that's very true Not just because of your music, not just because of your message, but even in the way she lived after that.

1:26:53Yeah, she lived her life. She lived amazing. Yeah, but and how she lived it. The fights that she fought, the sides of history she chose to be on. You get what I'm saying? When everything about where she came from told her to behave in a very particular way. Not being apologetic as well. And not being apologetic. You're right about it. So incidentally, when it said that your mom asked you to play I Just Called to say I love you. Do you know why that song was written? No. He wrote, Stevie Wonder wrote that song as to Madiba while he was in prison. That song to Nelson Mandela? Yes. I just called to say I love you.

1:27:32Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Yes. Stevie Wonder. Stevie Wonder. Wrote that song. It's dedicated to Madiba. To Nelson Mandela. To Nelson Mandela. What? Yes. Damn. Yeah. And of course, happy birthday to you, MLK. Yo, that's crazy. But that's all right. We're talking about... You know what I'm thinking now? Just the comedian part of my brain. The comedian part of my brain. Don't shoot. Just for comedy. Just for comedy. Not for real life. To me, put comedy disclaimer. The following is not appropriate for sensitive viewers. Viewer discretion is advised. Just for comedy. I'm picturing now.

1:28:15the song comes out mega hit all over the world Nelson Mandela is in Robben Island he's in prison the guard comes through busy playing it on a mini radio I just called to say ah you know Mandela's like ah he's like who's that song what an amazing song who's that the guard is like Mr. Mandela that is the new song from Stevie Wonder then Mandela's like ah he's got a new song It's so great Can I hear it again He's like I'll let you know When it comes on the radio again sir He's like Okay Yeah because then You couldn't just play it again Yeah yeah yeah So then he comes back Like in the next hour block Where they're playing He's like Oh Mr.

1:28:56Mandela Here it is You can listen to it Then Mandela He's like I love this song I love it Then every day The guard comes back Plays it for Mandela Every day he's like Oh wow What a song What a song I can't believe it I can't believe it Oh wow wow wow What a song And then the news comes out Someone reports on it And then the guard comes He's like Mr. Mandela Mr. Mandela he's like ah how are you and he's like Mr. Mandela I heard the most amazing thing today Stevie Wonder was doing an interview yes and he said that song you know I just called to say I love you yes he wrote it to you what do you mean to me he's like he wrote that song to you Mr.

1:29:32Mandela and Mandela was like wow that's okay No.

1:29:56You know that line from that movie? That's funny. Every time I try to leave, the game keeps calling me.

1:30:14when i saw him twinkling his eyes i was like

1:30:27i'm sorry man but halfway through the story i had hope there was time when you won me over i was like he's not gonna do it I looked at him and I was like, yeah, who's sharp? Oh, man. That uppercut was unnecessary. Okay, hey. I'm back, I'm back. Sorry, I'm back, I'm back. I'm back. Yeah, man, hey, I'm flying too low to the stadium, guys. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Hey, guys. Hey, flying too low to the stadium, guys. Sorry, sorry, guys. Sorry, guys. That was amazing. Oh, man. Wait. Do you know what connects me to Dolly Parton? Yeah. Guys, I don't know about you, but this was my life and Dolly Parton. Manual labor at home.

1:31:21Every Saturday, I'm there cleaning the stoop, red polish, playing Dolly Parton. Oh, yeah. And then I'm like, my mom wants me to use a brush to clean the primary stove so that it's like glistening. And I'm taking the newspaper, cleaning the windows, and Dolly Parton is blasting in the background. That's my association with Dolly Parton. It's amazing, bro. Every single Saturday, we're playing Dolly Parton and that's what's happening. You guys don't, or is it just me? No, no, no. So it's all right. No, no, no. funny enough for my maybe just because of age thing or where we were playing it Dolly Parton was the music my mom played for me that was her music my stoop cleaning sweeping music was all like Boyz II Men Mariah Carey yeah them too yeah yeah but what I'm saying Dolly Parton for some reason was never played around cleaning time I was always there by the stoop literally in my head I was just like we belong together and you know our parents let us sing I'll make love to you just presently my man they were like I'll make a laugh to you yeah hey my man looking at you as long as the house is clean you can sing what you want ah skit skit manabaga ah skit yeah clean from the window to the wall you can't be cleaning that's a perfect that's a perfect cleaning song actually so she but you see I caught already story at the end when I met you caught her at the beginning when she was telling you and then at the end oh at the end man it was so funny because Mina was there participating like we're all sad that Dolly died so then my mom she like flips immediately she goes from like mourning the loss the whole thing and then she's like yo by the way she's like did you see that she planned her whole funeral and like rehearsed it and I was like what are you talking about she's like yeah she saw this thing where planned it rehearsed it told everyone what it's going to be how she's going to dress whatever she's going to be buried in high heels whatever then I was like oh that's cool then my mom was like no She's like what?

1:33:26Control freak Then my mom was like Yeah that's very sad Yeah me and Eugene Are both like Then my mom was like Hey Control freak She's like You're gone Why do you care What shoes you're wearing? Ah yeah yeah yeah You're gone What are you talking about? Then I was like Mom that's You can say And then the only The only way I can get her To like At least see a point of view Is I'll go like Okay In the bible How many people Made requests Before they died About what they would like To happen After they were dead And then she was like yeah yeah okay well the people that did that all the time all the time in the bible all the time yeah all the time there's so many of them once i'm gone you must do this you must do then you must go to where we and do that or i want to be buried like this um i mean like moses was one was like bury me on a mountain without my things and my this and my that king david had his request as well bury me like this and the thing must do that in my oh what is it yeah peter said he's um bury me like what is it when they crucify him it should be upside down yeah oh and then there was um tupac said the hose that i used to know from long ago kiss me from my head to my toe that's similar but not the same but he said it but no it's it's so then she was like okay yeah She's like okay I get it So wait Cause she was also mentioning Guti people are doing Final holidays Guti Now people When they know that They're gonna die Yeah They plan their death They're gonna get that injection It's funny She was actually talking My mom was talking about you Without realizing it She was talking about you Without realizing it She was saying She's fascinated by people Who like Like live the last years Of their life But like knowing They're going to die Or either like Planning their death Yes Or whatever You know But they go I'm gonna die So this is my last big trip Vacation And this is my last I'm throwing a big party And throwing this And throwing that My outfit You know what I mean Pay your baba in advance Yeah And then But then we were having a discussion We're like Maybe it's because We've never had the luxury But we don't know of any like Black people doing that ever Yeah I can't I can't think of anybody Unless you are State president But that's what I mean Like we couldn't think of Anyone saying Yeah Yeah we're going It's our last family trip Because Grandpa's going soon Yeah He'll be like Going where?

1:35:49Yeah but when your grandmother Stops drinking tab That's funny That's when you know I'm going to say I'm going to say coke straight You're so funny Like I remember You know like In 2014 From the World Cup in Brazil My grandmother You know from my dad's side You know she was getting sick And you know She was being hospitalized And you could see Just like the last few days And I remember thinking There's someone that better not die before I go to Brazil for the World Cup. Oh, Kaya. Did she hold on? I swear to God, she held on. Because she was also there like, yo, bro, I want to watch the World Cup.

1:36:26And then I was like, she held on. I'm in Brazil and I'm like, hey, if I get any message from home, does this mean that I have to, you know, cut my trip short and then to fly back home? She hung on for another two weeks and then, you know, I got back. World Cup was over and I was like, well done, Gran. Yeah. That's a Coco who loves you Your grand I'm betting your grandmother Would love you so much That she would hold on For you knowing that Your grand also held on I think she did Yeah I told you that story I think I did right Remind me Where I came I came back to visit One of my trips Oh yeah Yeah and she was like Trevor's here And my mom was like Trevor's not here He's in New York And she was like Nope Trevor's here And then I was here I hadn't told anyone I was supposed to be a surprise I went to see her She was there And then she said You came to say goodbye And I was like goodbye I came to say hello I just walked in the door I thought it was like dementia or something which she didn't have I was just like no hello I came to say hello she's like oh I thought I wasn't going to see you before I leave then I was like what are you but she was like very casual about it and my gran used to joke a lot so I didn't assume there wasn't a heaviness around it but yeah and then I left and then after that week maybe like a few maybe a month later possibly in her sleep I remember she was just like yeah my nose is moisturized and she knew

1:38:01So Kyle this is exciting Before we go What are you going to do now New life New life new K I'm excited bro I didn't know this by the way No I'm going to tell about it And invest in my business As I was saying But really So tell me some of the things Tell me some of the things You Didn't even allow yourself The luxury of considering That you now Are considering And you're going like Actually Because I was afraid I wasn't going to be here I didn't even allow myself The possibility of thinking about it But now I am Now I'm What are you entertaining That you didn't Because you thought you couldn't before?

1:38:34Being married Love it I know It's so funny Because sometimes I think I was like Well I'm a bit older do I want to have kids? And then I think, I mean, my father died when I was 26. You know, he was young and had kids. You know, you could die. Yes. Yes. There's no, there's no, you know what I'm saying? And then even that, you'd be a great dad. Yeah. So now that, thank you. I think so too. The only dad telling his little child about Bill Clinton's autobiography. You know what? Is, is. You know what? You'd be the only dad. No, but you would be. And your kid talking from the bedroom, Mom, come fetch your man Because you love Just like you love learning You espouse curiosity You love people You know what I mean I can see that for you And then obviously I'm like I'm going to take a brave step And just do something I've never done before I love this Which is what?

1:39:32Return our text messages Wow Reply to our text Now I get it I was like Hey guys I can't respond I might be dying guys I might be dying These blue ticks Are not what you think It's the blue ticks Of death boys I can't respond It's so funny You know Kaya Time does die Timely death Using calendars Chinese calendar Gregorian calendar Then there was The Inca one Oh yeah But it's so funny Like You just actually Reminded me Like I don't know You're calling me I think I think You're Ryan I don't know who else was in the car. Yeah. I don't know what you called me about. And then the conversation ended, whatever.

1:40:15And then you call me like 30 seconds later, a minute later. And like, yo, the conversation wasn't done. Like, how are you ending conversations like that? So what Kaya does is, ends the conversation like a sitcom. He, he, he, you'll be talking. Yeah. When you get to the end of a point or an idea, He then just automatically assumes That's the end of the conversation And then he stops Terrible spum-pum ticking Wait Terrible Terrible He never got it My friend Wait wait So you'll be like Okay let's do a conversation I'll show you Let's go Sure sure Sure chap Keep fine love I know I'm great Eugene I'm great my man How are you Hey I'm fine Did you know that Stevie Wonder wrote that song I just called Say I Love You All Counter I know I read that I read it That's crazy Yeah man that's wild That's crazy No man I found him back immediately I found him back immediately And I was like yo what happened And he's like what Did we get cut off He's like no chap I thought we were done I was like my man No brother No brother Why is Kaya treating every conversation like it's a moskot that's how Kaya does it wait how do you determine when it's over Kaya I I just think it's over I don't have I don't have I don't have like a thing but I just there's a moment ah I think this conversation is over and it's so funny because it's something I've been told before that I end conversations awkwardly and then for a while it's okay I need to be conscious actually of how I end conversations now because I know I've got to wait for that Okay bye bye bye Bye bye bye Yes Okay bye bye bye And you toss her dude Come on On top of all of these things We toss her time We've never said goodbye Like one time Yeah yeah That's true We said goodbye to my mom How many times yesterday?

1:42:17That's true Six? Seven times? Wait at the house? All over We said goodbye in the car Yeah Then we said Then we got out of the car And said goodbye Then we walked her to the gate Then we said goodbye Then we walked her in the house Then we said goodbye Then she said Wait can you just come with me To do something? Then we went with her Then we went we did things then we came back then said goodbye in the car again then said goodbye when we got out the car then said goodbye at the gate again and then said goodbye inside and then you hooted the final goodbye but now here you are yeah I know I don't know why I don't know but it's like a thing but I can see where it comes from you know black people when someone has died they'll ask you what was the last thing that person said there's always that thing yeah I've been cool man or we were having a conversation he was telling me yeah I know I should have known I should have read the sign so Kai was like you will never quote me.

1:43:06What was the last thing? Toot, toot, toot. Dad.

1:43:12Oh, man. Kyle's like, you'll never quote me. Damn, Kyle. Okay, yeah, this is the thing we're going to work on, man. Oh, yeah. But this is dope. I'm glad you actually told, because you've never told me this. Now that you've told me, I'm excited to be part of like your new life. It's going to be dope, man. You know, it's been a year since we first, exactly a year. Do you realize? Santa Maria, you're right. Since the first time we hung out You guys were the first Like my favorite people Yeah Exactly Literally It's been a year Santa Maria That's amazing So another one man My man I'm gonna celebrate Your birthdays extra now You know that I'm being serious Where's your birthday?

1:43:45April 16th I'm gonna celebrate it extra now But he's like It's so funny Like you Last year Or the last year You forced me to have My birthday Because I was like I'm just landing from Canada And Trevor's like Good for you We're doing this thing We're doing this thing Yeah, bro. And I didn't even know this. Yeah, and I didn't know this. Yeah, bro. Let's do it. This has been dope, man. Thank you, guys. Here's to another year. Here's to another year. Another year. Or five. Another year. Or ten. Let's do one at a time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't want to fly too low.

1:44:20One at a time, guys. One at a time, guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. One at a time, not three at a time. Yeah, dope, dope, dope. Oh, man. I just called. Yeah. What is it? What is it? Wait, tell us. Stevie wanted to not write I just called to say I love you for Nelson Mandela, but he famously dedicated his 1985 Academy Award for the song to him. Oh, that's close enough. Okay, okay. No, it's not like a non-story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay. But thank you for that clarification. I don't need the thought. No, no, but that's good. No, but yeah, if you sing here, Bambara and Jeppe, I don't need Liana. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:44:57At least now, now Mandela will be like, oh, that's better. That's better. That was so funny. What Now with Trevor Noah is produced by DayZero Productions in partnership with SiriusXM The show is executive produced by Trevor Noah, Sanaz Yamin and Jess Hackle Rebecca Chain is our producer Our development researcher is Marcia Robiu Music, mixing and mastering by Hannes Brown Random Other Stuff by Ryan Harduth Thank you so much for listening Join me next week for another episode of What Now?

1:45:40Snoring, gasping for air during sleep, daytime sleepiness. I'm Shaquille O 'Neal, and this shouldn't be anybody's experience. Ask your doctor about ZepBound Terzepatide, the first and only FDA-approved prescription medicine for moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea in adults with obesity. ZepBound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced-calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and obesity to improve their OSA. ZepBound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15 milligram injection. ZepBound contains trisepatide and should not be used with other trisepatide-containing products or any GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines.

1:46:20It is not known if ZepBound is safe and effective for use in children. Don't share needles or pens or reuse needles. Don't take if allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2. Tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop ZEP bound and call your doctor if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic reaction. Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia.

1:46:50If you're nursing, pregnant, plan to be, or taking birth control pills, taking ZEP bound with a sulfonylurea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems. Talk to your doctor. Call 1-800-545-5979 or visit zepbound.lily.com.

1:47:33All that's in store. Visit the Wayfair store today at Edens Plaza and Wilmette. Wayfair, every style, every home.