S4 Ep 32: Night In Vlogs & A Dead Laptop

0:00This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on Marketplace and there it was, the bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for. From a browse to a bike ride, this summer, find more on Facebook. Chronic migraine. 15 or more headache days a month, each lasting 4 hours or more, can make me feel like a spectator in my own life. Botox, onabotulinum toxin A, prevents headaches in adults with chronic migraine.

0:41It's not for those with 14 or fewer headache days a month. It's the number one prescribed branded chronic migraine preventive treatment. Prescription Botox is injected by your doctor. Effects of Botox may spread hours to weeks after injection, causing serious symptoms. Allerge your doctor right away as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems, or muscle weakness can be signs of a life-threatening condition. Patients with these conditions before injection are at highest risk. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue, and headache. Allergic reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms, and dizziness.

1:10Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions, including ALS Lou Gehrig's disease, myasthenia gravis or Lambert-Eaton syndrome, and medications, including botulinum toxins, as these may increase the risk of serious side effects. Why wait? Ask your doctor, visit BotoxChronicMigraine.com, or call 1-800-44-BOTOX to learn more.

1:51up at your shows have the crowd witnessing the murder like they rolled in with a gang of crows fuck the censorship let them see the whole thing they stay dressed to kill never sheep's clothing dark enough to turn the sun to the moon you'll see nothing all you hear is a huff a puff and a expect killings red spilling and flesh ripping impressive in it the death bringing its head spinning just kidding every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog Welcome. Yo! What a day? What a day? Welcome to the world for now. I'm still, I'm just still at Disney. And it's 6am here.

2:29And we're about to leave. It's a less impressive view than the one we had last time. We felt like we were a sort of part of the Disney world. Because you could see windows and people, yeah. I know, but I felt less in control when we were in the other bit. so I'm in the corner now so I can see I like it are you coming home today? I'm home today bro how since we last heard from you how's the Disney and your bloodstream feeling? we've done I reckon I've done every ride at Disney every single one I can't think of one that I haven't done done the Disney ride done the shopping eating the snacks you know like I'm in but I'm out now because I'm about to leave but it's been good man are you disney done well i mean that's it there's no more disney to be heard unless we have a spot of disney lunch before if mickey came in now right it was just you and him sitting there and he was making himself a coffee and he did that little glance over his shoulder he saw you like that waits for the podcaster to finish because he's a gentleman and he's obviously in the business himself and as you get up to leave and you sort of went all right mick and he went hey rumish i got an offer for you if i offered you another week here all expenses paid would you take it right now um no i mean if it's all expenses paid then yes i would yeah but um but the other thing is is like um it's actually quite exhausting being in disney do you know i mean like it's like a job it is i guess you've got to see it's like a job it is fun it is fun but i mean yeah it's not you've got to see stuff but like it is fun but i've looked on my phone i've done 30 000 steps every day pretty much well there's gonna be anything left of you when you come back i think i might try and i need to find a way to be walking around a theme park every day because it's i mean it's the best card i've ever done in my life can i just say your life is your own theme park if you set it that way you just gotta keep walking baby yeah but i mean what i'm saying is i haven't got i haven't got five to six hours spare every day to wander around that's the point i'm trying to mention it's easy to say my life is my theme park but like a theme park there's bills to pay do you know what i mean so yeah i guess i guess just get excited about walking between things like you do like you know come on phil hurry up we need to get to you know donald duck's crazy alley or whatever yeah that's that that is that is probably the one that's got the biggest cues actually donald duck's crazy alley and then there's uh mickey's crack den as well which is probably the second most popular and then there's sort of uh goofy's den of iniquity which is Goofy's Brothel Goofy's Brothel You've got to have a lot of fun in here Have you sort of spent time with Sorry that was mine Wow your daughter that's got so much better Yeah thanks Have you spent time with any of the characters like sort of because you've been there for what two weeks has anyone sort of have you walked past anyone's sort of recognised you and gone oh shit I've met you before What are the characters are you asking if the characters are recognized yeah like mickey comes into the hotel yeah i mean i did meet yeah i did meet mickey but he's not watched avoidance so you know there wasn't like no he doesn't know you're rubbish but it's like oh hello again you were i saw you last week you've been here for two weeks no they don't do that they don't do that it would be sweet if they did but uh no they don't do that grace has got a mini mouse obsession at the moment she's very much into Minnie Mouse.

6:03What are you doing? You're quashing that down and trying to get her into Mickey. Like, Mickey's good. What's Donald Duck's missus called? Daisy. Daisy Duck, yeah. That's the one I find her quite irritating if I'm honest with you. In what way? Well, she... I think she's got very Monica from Friends sort of... In what way? In what way? Like, if she's in a scene, she takes it over. She can't play it small. She's such a big character. I mean, both are ducks. Famously, Donald is very... He's very... He's very understated. The only duck I like is Scrooge. Okay. I like Scrooge. He says a lot about you, to be honest.

6:41I am talking to somebody who's slowly doing various bits and keeping up various revenue streams in order to hold on to them and cling on to them. Bought himself a little palace in the most affluent area of London. And it's now just what I imagine. All of the work that you've had done in your house, I imagine one of those rooms is some sort of money pit that you're going to dive into in your trunks. Yes, I tell you, money pit wise, it's literally, I've got about 15 quid in it at the moment, the way fucking things are. As soon as it comes in, it comes out.

7:14I actually, I got caught last night, well, into a, which is an insensate. So basically, me and Catherine were working out having a little workout together, doing a bit of Pilates and some work. That's really sweet. Yeah, we like a workout together. It's fun. We put Grace to bed and we have a little chill. and then she said oh what do you want to watch something is there anything you're watching and i was like not really yeah so do you not talk to each other when you're not working out then we do talk a bit we we do talk a bit but uh to be fair i've i've had i've been working at home for the last sort of week so it's been i've been at home quite a lot and i spent all weekend with quite intense food poisoning so she's had just about enough of me at the moment um yeah i can I got the most brutal, I had some prawns on Friday night that literally took me to a place that I didn't think I was going to come back from.

8:04Like the stomach cramps I had were biblical. I was in so much agony, you know, and I'd literally get into bed and I start like, just yeah, get into bed and I go, shit, I've got to go again. I'd sprint to the toilet to the point where Grace, who was sort of sleeping in our room, she's sleeping on a mattress on the floor at the moment because that's where she likes to sleep. Oh, I forgot. You like to play this game with it, don't you? Let's be homeless. What was she like about you? What was she like about you pissing all over it? She likes commentating now. No, she liked that. She liked that. She liked that.

8:39Yeah. And every time I walk past it, I throw some loose change on her. That's our money pit. And I get out of the bed to go to the toilet and Catherine went, are you all right? Are you okay? and then grace went here we go again it's like you know sort of like oh he's just going to be whinging and complaining for the next 20 minutes um awful food boys anyhow so i've cuffed and i think it's then to her credit it'd be very sympathetic and sweet but i just had enough of my moaning so she stuck on stuck on um for a bit she stuck on molly may and then she was like i was going to watch zoe ray who's i don't know if you're accustomed to zoe ray is molly may's sister okay um so she only is she only watching molly may's family stuff yes in psychic gosh it's like why are we like why are we watching it this this is such a fucking insult like look i've got nothing against i should be quite open i've got nothing against either of these people i don't know them but i'm like have you ever watched any of this sort of stuff uh i did start to watch the molly may thing because i'd um no not the documentary not the documentary what are you talking about this is her vlogs her vlogs okay no i've not watched like molly may's molly may's i guess have a body may's pretty good at what she does vlog wise i mean it's not made for me it's not made for a 46 year old grumpy dad of one but we then start watching this zoe ray and she was doing a vlog about her having a night in and she was bored so she went to tesco's and and bought some pajamas and the ingredients for a shepherd's pie.

10:15And then came home, made the shepherd's pie, tried tango cherry for the first time, which blew her mind. And then Catherine went, I'm done. I've done my pull-up. I'm just going to... I've got some stuff to do before bed. And I was like, of course, you want me to turn this off? And I went, oh, no, leave it on. I ended up watching... I made a video on Instagram where I was taking the mick out of this woman. And I will say, to her credit, she then DM'd me and was very, very funny. and shout out to Zoe Ray for being a good sport. But I was like, I don't get what this is. It's essentially a really boring night in.

10:48And then I ended up watching a whole video of her going camping, which was a bit more interesting. And then I was like, just stood there and like, Catherine literally came down. It's like I've been caught watching porn. She went, why are you still watching this? Why are you watching this? I want you to watch it. It's weird that you're sitting watching this. Can I ask a question? When you posted the Instagram story about Zoe Ray, did you tag Zoe Ray? No, no. So what, she just follows you and found out that you'd... She doesn't follow me. She doesn't follow me. Someone must have messaged and said, this big dungus has commented about you.

11:22And what exactly was your comment? Well, first of all, I commented... I'll read you out what I put. Just watching whoever this is during our workout this evening. Just watched her shop for shepherd's pie ingredients in Tesco's. now she's contemplating her favorite fizzy pop i'm contemplating dropping a dumbbell on my head what what do you think is is what do you think is more boring um watching it actually happen or transcribing it for people yeah but i'm in the mix now and then i genuinely yeah yeah i yeah i watched the camping one and actually got quite emotional because it actually seems like she's quite a sweet kid but what happened did she try cherry coat and then i read into it and then actually she's had quite a lot of controversy as well i don't know if you know no don i'd love to I didn't hear about it.

12:07Tell me. Yeah. Well, she went to Bali with her husband. And they stayed in a hotel for 24 hours. And then she left. And she sort of went quite hard in on Bali. I do know about this. I do know. I remember this. Yeah. Because she just didn't like it, right? Yeah. And then she sort of did a scathing thing about it. And she said it was kind of, she was pretty harsh about it. Yeah. I always think it's slightly tricky to go in on a country after you spent sort of less than a day there yeah but also i think it's it's difficult to go in on a country full stop yeah yeah i mean but the hotel that was saying that looks incredible anyway i mean she's like look the difference between you and some of the places you've been and how you can hold her she's literally the opposite of rome rome ranganathan like if that was your night in that would have been so much more interesting first of all it wouldn't have been you know that there wouldn't have been.

13:00Second of all, what the... Just trying to get X videos working, fucking Keir Starmer. Got to do a proof of age. How many times have I got to take a selfie for this thing to verify me? I've actually fucking... I've actually posted my driving licence to Pornhub. Fucking hell, Lisa's only out for 25 minutes. Fucking hell, Jesus Christ. I need the verification confirmation, please. Time is of the essence. Theo, what's that VPN? Theo! Dad, stop wanking, bro. Stop wanking, you dirty old man. Lisa, just why don't you walk the dogs from me longer, love? I need a little bit more downtime, please. That's a ring doorbell.

13:45That's going to be that fucking Deliveroo. Oh! Lisa, have you got an envelope I can put my passport in? I just need to get this verification confirmed. No, I've actually decided... Lisa, where's your credit card? Where's the credit card? I'm actually going to get a flight out to California and meet these people and just let them know, just show them my phone, so it's like a future, it's future-proofing myself. Fucking star, you bloody fucking piss-taker, mate. The thing I don't understand about vlogs is, the thing that you described about her just going, is it just like you're... they're not setting up something to i mean listen as i say this i realize i'm building myself a glass house to throw stones from here because at the end of the day we're not making any concessions to entertainment and doing this podcast but the vlog is just like is it just like join me today as i go to tesco's or something yeah i mean it's literally like i'm i'm in i'm in this saturday night this is what i'm doing like like i'm taking a mick out of it kathen watches these days i and And then I stood there and watched someone I don't even know.

14:54Like, I adore you, right? I think you're one of the funniest people. But if you called me and transcribed that night that she'd had to me, I'd go, what's going on here? Like, it's literally how you're, you know, just fancy cooking a shepherd's pie because I hadn't had a shepherd's pie for a while. So just went to Tesco's, got all the bits for a shepherd's pie. Went with a sweet potato because I'm watching my carb intake. made another one for molly may for when she gets in um and then i saw some soft pajamas because i've actually got loads of pajamas um that are i've got like shorts and and then i've got like long sleeve top but i've got no actual set so i thought actually i need a set of pajamas so yeah i've got these ones actually really soft they're really nice uh and then yeah that was i'm just listening just listening to you do that i quite enjoyed it so i'm starting to think that Yeah, but it's actually quite relaxing in therapy.

15:51But look, I've had a lot of people message me saying that she's a very sweet, sweet soul, and she's a nice, she's got a good side to her. How different is that from somebody... Maybe if we have a guest on here at any point, maybe Zoe Ray is a guest that we get on. How different is that from, I don't know... It could be quite interesting. ...from somebody, I don't know, documenting their day going to the dump or something? Is that different? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, can I just say, by the way, can I just say full transparency? transparency, right? My trip to the dump, I put a little bit of a soundtrack, I tried to make it relatively amusing.

16:25Look, but maybe this is the future. Maybe, like, literally, if I was to do it with just going to the shops without any funny quips, mate, if you're not thinking of any funny quips, then fucking life is sweet, do you know what I mean? If you're not having to think of a joke of sorts or anything, do you know what I mean? Yeah, no, listen, I've watched the Mandrill Promo stuff, but my question to you is, is there any... Is there any chance that you... You snarky little prick. Is there any chance that you might... I'm going to be a bit snarky. I've been in a fucking hotel with a family. I ain't having my X videos for a fucking fortnight, mate.

17:02No, my question is, would you ever think about doing a vlog? Yeah, I mean... I'd love to see some homework of doing a vlog between now and next week. Okay, yeah. I'm going to do a day in the life type thing. Yeah, I'd love you to do that. And then, have you got a YouTube channel? yeah i have i mean it's fucking okay cool let's do it yeah i mean just like i mean pick a random day like don't i know you'll you've got quite an exciting job on the right i don't want you like documenting that it's got to be something like no no that's unfair just an everyday thing okay cool right okay like make it so like no cool sexy stuff just like just very the mundanity of my life yeah and like you know most of it just like you going into just like general like everyday like everyday stuff yeah okay okay we're on it

18:02i mean do you know when we're talking about mondanity and i know that that this we've got uh this is a bit of bat and ball now because i know that there's already already an email that's coming about. I had an experience. This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on Marketplace and there it was, the bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for.

18:39From a browse to a bike ride, this summer, find more on Facebook. Chronic migraine, 15 or more headache days a month, each lasting four hours or more, can make me feel like a spectator in my own life. Botox, on a botulinum toxin A, prevents headaches in adults with chronic migraine. It's not for those with 14 or fewer headache days a month. It's the number one prescribed branded chronic migraine preventive treatment. Prescription Botox is injected by your doctor. Effects of Botox may spread hours to weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. Allerge your doctor right away as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems, or muscle weakness can be signs of a life-threatening condition.

19:15Patients with these conditions before injection are at highest risk. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue, and headache. Allergic reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms, and dizziness. Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions, including ALS Lou Gehrig's disease, myasthenia gravis or Lambert-Eaton syndrome, and medications, including botulinum toxins, as these may increase the risk of serious side effects. Why wait? Ask your doctor, visit BotoxChronicMigraine.com or call 1-800-44-BOTOX to learn more.

19:45The Viore Core Short moves with you. With everyday versatility and classic athletic fit. It's the one short for everything your day brings. Invest in your happiness and get 20 % off your first purchase at Viore.com slash Core20. That's v-u-o-r-i dot com slash k-o-r-e-2-0. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. It was more Catherine than me. Right, so we were, on Saturday, you know, I was in, in not a great way, but we popped into town. We had some bits to do, and I wanted to get out of the house. So the three of us walked into town. On the way back, Grace was watching saying on Catherine's phone, playing with Catherine's phone, and then she got annoyed with it and decided to throw the phone into the road.

20:35So he threw the phone into the road and a car drove over it. Which was probably like, watching it happen is one of the most hilarious things on the basis of number one friend on the road was like, oh, you don't throw the phone. And then literally watching a car drive over your wife's phone. Can I just, I think it is, listen, the fact that you've delivered this in such a blasé way, I'm going to be honest with you, is about six or seven red flags. Go on. So, first of all, you're going to need to give me a bit of context here. Yeah. Talk me into the circumstance that led to Catherine frying the phone into the right place.

21:15No, no, no. Grace threw the phone. Grace, Grace, Grace. Oh, Grace. Oh, Grace. Sorry, sorry. Grace. I misunderstood. I thought Catherine... I thought Catherine threw the phone. Catherine threw the phone. I misheard. No, no, no. No, no, no. So we're going on. She's watching something. Grace, can I say, by the way, youtuber like she's watching kids youtube but youtube for kids is i don't think i mean she's too young she's spiraling from things to things she gets annoyed she throws it into the she throws it not purposely in the road and as it hits the road we both sort of i sort of laughed because it was just when she kicks off it's always quite funny kathy chuckled and then as i went to get the phone a car just went over it okay that's bad that's unfortunate i'll try and find the phone said to get a picture yeah i mean it's fucking it's awful right so we're like oh shit okay saturday afternoon we're seeing some friends we're going to you know have bits of friends we have like friends that step in when you're away substitutes actually while we were seeing these friends i said about you being my best friend and this person took quite a lot of humbridge to it and said what's second best friend surely and i was like i don't think me and you are best friends yeah romish is definitely yeah so what did you what did you say like rom's come around here once yeah no they didn't come to us by the way we would okay fine still you're you're still the only friends we've had around okay all right good that's good to know um well she's actually fucking sad anyway that's actually that's actually found me maybe for quite a second year i digress so so she's without a phone all saturday um which she sort of like comes with its own problems you know who's allowed to able to buy anything for you know 18 hours um so we then we go to Sunday morning we're going to go to O2 so we go to O2 in Watford and what transpires is maybe the worst customer service I've ever experienced in my life like look we've paid insurance on our phones for the last four years as an O2 phone we've paid the insurance seemingly for nothing seemingly you don't have to pay insurance because it doesn't really matter whether you want insurance or not they can't replace your phone so what um and the kid who worked there whilst being quite a nice enough lad just seemed like it was a sunday he'd been out the saturday night couldn't really be fucked to sort of do anything and sort of almost said as such uh and yeah i mean katherine got a lot more annoyed than denied it katherine was quite a right on the basis that she's now without a phone we're going away this week she might not get a phone because they're seemingly not going to exchange you um it was all a bit of a fiasco can you can you i'd love a bit more i'd love a bit more detail if you're the one tom because and also when you've i mean you've got had toddlers we've got a three year old who is at the moment just wants to run around and try and just literally sprint off and do other last thing she wants to stay is watch sort of her parents run well she shouldn't have thrown the phone into the road should i mean these are this is cause and consequence yeah there's a lesson to be learned.

24:16But first of all, why did they, why did they say that they didn't want to change the phone? Cause like, it feels like, uh, it's just like there's something they don't do in store. So it's, they're like, we can't exchange your phone in store. And I was like, look, you know, how do we, so they're like, you, it takes a week to exchange the phone. I was like, well, we go. And also my wife can't be without a phone on the basis that she's got a small child and she can't be going around without a phone. If there's an emergency, if anything what did they what did they suggest as a solution don't know they might when i say literally nothing then the manager then he said can we speak to a manager like just to see if we can get a bit more clarity on what's going on he goes away comes back and said the manager's just in the office at the moment i said yeah but we've got a problem here we need to we need to sort out and he went yeah i don't know if he'll he'll come out so then he went back and he got the manager and the manager came out and you could tell the manager was clearly had been you know either trying to put his sort of passport through porn hub or having a bet on the football that afternoon he he had knowing he had no interest in in any customers and look man this is what it is it's just the state of where we are right now right people do a job a lot of people don't take any pride in what they do i i get it it's soulless i've done jobs i didn't want to do i'm not i've turned up for work and not wanted to be there it's just i get a bit of a kick in the teeth when you're sort of so yeah and then they were constantly by the way going you could just buy a new headset my understanding my understanding was i've broken phones before don't you just phone up and they send you a new one we tried that but they they said to take it into store on the phone so hold on so on the phone yeah when you phone them up they said go on the saturday we call oh sorry on the saturday i'm missing an important bit on the saturday we'd called them i too and And they said, when we spoke to someone like I said, they said, can you take it into a store tomorrow?

26:11We've then gone, yeah, we can take it into Watford. And they said, right, just to see what the damage was, essentially. So now we're in a situation where... Sorry, I don't understand what the problem is. So they've asked you to take the phone in, you've taken the phone in, and then what's changed is... And then they said they couldn't do anything. They said it's pointless. Oh, so when we went in, they're like, there's nothing we could do for you here. I don't know where you've been sent in here. so basically now we've lost the day so we've got to then send the phone off for them to do a thing but that takes seven to ten days we're now going away on saturday so we then have a situation so then you lost your temper in the shop and created a big scene no i didn't lose my temper i was very chill i lost i was losing my head a little bit of grace if i'm going to be quite honest with you because she was being an absolute shitbag um but i didn't lose my temper with yeah i mean Catherine I will say was a lot more right the cat was and has subsequently is feeling like I'm living with Michael Douglas and falling down her without her going cold turkey from her phone has not been an enjoyable situation to be living to be honest with you you're doing alright aren't you I mean can't you just buy a new handset or like a little cheap one second hand one we've nearly paid the handset off why should I pay for another a handset where it's insured and they should just give you a new one that's what insurance otherwise look mate if i had paid insurance full clarity then yeah i'm the idiot i should then buy a new handset or a caffeine dealia whatever we should if we hadn't taken out if you've taken out insurance on something then surely there's a situation where you go right well that's that's why you paid 250 quid insurance over the last fucking four years can i just say to him i'm beginning to i hope you don't mind me saying i'm beginning to get a little insight into what might have happened at the OT because I've asked quite a gentle question there and you've bitten back quite aggressively if you don't mind me saying.

28:06No, but look, the difference between me and you as lawyers, right? You're a very like sit back, sedate kind of guy. You're very clever. I'm not going to take that away from you. I'm passion. I'm Kevin Costner and JFK, mate. I lay it all out there. Yeah, but I mean, Kevin, the difference between sort of you and Kevin Costner is Kevin gosner had a point you know that that would be my main right listen i know that this the guy from o2 by the way is it is emailed because you've you did your thing that i love what that you do more than anything is when you text and said um did katherine have a problem with her phone in o2 watford no no that's not that's not what happened i said did you two go into o2 watford and i'll tell you why I did that because we got an email in and they sort of said that you'd got quite irate or it'd been a bit of a stressful situation.

29:00And then I thought maybe it's a case of mistaken identity because you seem like such a chilled out guy, you know, generally I was surprised. So then I was like, I will say that I, I, I'm a passionate person. I don't think I was irate. Okay. I don't think I was irate. I'm just saying it was like, it wasn't a pleasant interaction. is the point I'm trying to make. Do you know what I mean? So - I think the fact is that, who is it from? Was it from the manager? It was, no, it was actually from the brother of the person that served you, who's a big wolf and our fan. Oh, right, the brother. Okay. Yeah.

29:33And the person that served you is also a fan. They didn't say they're a wolf and our fan, they said they're a fan of yours. So - But if they say, the guy, I find that almost, like the guy showed no, I don't think he had a clue who I was if I'm going to be quite honest with you. He wasn't like at all. No, he knew who you were. He did know who you were. Yeah, but then he wasn't at all chatty or conversational. He just seemed that... Well, I guess it's difficult when you feel someone's breath on your face as they're screaming at you about getting their phone replaced. It's very difficult to then go, I loved King Gary.

30:07You're such a twerp. I literally, I was very gentle at first are very like and if my problem isn't really with him because it was more with the the fact that the situation with the manager like the whole situation with the manager what's the what's the what's the final outcome well katherine's not got a phone and uh we've had to buy her a crappy little handset um which she hates um uh because i've looked yeah and we're hoping that her replacement handset comes by the time we go away so they are sending a replacement handset yeah well they've got to evaluate her one first we've had to send i don't understand this evaluating and all this if it's broke it's broken right right wrong i don't we've yeah but we've had to pay i don't we've had to send it off and i'm assuming that they then look at it and then send i don't understand this like normally don't they just don't they just go well by the way she's like got literally 50 honestly wrong that the hoops and stuff that we've had to jump through this should be such an easy thing your phone's broken you send it off it's all done bang okay well we'll send you another one you've paid your insurance that's what that's what that's always that's how it's always worked for me i've known it yeah this i don't know what's made this so difficult i don't know whether katherine's done something differently or what but it the whole thing has been a pain in the arse okay thanks for censoring yourself my my but but did you have you gone for some sort of lower tier insurance or something no i haven't gone for a lower tier i've gone for premium the only insurance we're offered whoa relax relax can i actually shout out what's the one thing i will say by the way the difference apple by the way we get so we pop into apple to see if they can we they can they've got a handset we can i i've got apple care because i've got you know the mac and the phone i just found i took out apple care because i just i'm very very neurotic about these things um and i've had my pants pulled down so an apple where i said before my phone broke apple replaced it that day so we went to apple the people at apple at the genius bar shout out the genius bar very kind very considerate couldn't do enough very helpful didn't replace the phone but actually just felt like they actually cared a little bit about what was going on okay fine um so i should show you do you mind if do you mind if i put to sort of positive like a counter argument if you don't mind okay just you know just playing devil's advocate okay is it possible is it possible that the reason first of all let me just say i understand your frustration cat wants her phone do you know i mean and i get it it's frustrating for couples when their phones break they're then forced with the very real possibility of having to interact with each other directly which is never which is never a fun time yeah to actually sort of say how was your dance is awful are we going to a holiday how much how much you and lisa on your phones are you at least on your phones a lot on the other day i've actually this sounds like i'm doing this deliberately now but i've not been on my phone that well it's you're it's different if you're at disney theme park there's no reason to look at your phone do you know what i mean like i've not been on it very much at all yeah exactly i've been on it till i look up in the evenings like when the boys go to oh yeah yeah i would say so yeah yeah um it's mainly in the morning oh anyway this is so boring i can't even begin to start talking about it but anyway the point i'm to make is this, I understand your frustration.

33:26So I'm not deliberately being sort of, but it's possible, isn't it? That the person that was serving you is only able to help you as much as O2 will allow them to help you. So they're sort of hamstrung. Do you know what I mean? Now, if O2 go, listen, you can't replace the phone straight away, you've got to evaluate it. So that's the message you've got to deliver. So this person is like receiving that information, they're going well actually ideally i'd love to be able to say to this person who i adore like please i could just replace the phone but i can't do that and then you go to apple and apple have got a much more lenient policy so then it's not that you're not you're not commending the staff there are you it's like one of them's got like five pounds to give you the other one's got a million pounds to give you which one are you going to prefer do you mean obviously you're going to prefer the customer service at the place where they give you a million pounds because that's what they've been able to give you right do you see what i'm saying can i just say what i'm saying is you know you didn't need to shout at number one i didn't shout you are you are a ridiculous little prick at time right firstly to give that like the people at o2 the ladder to credit like if we hadn't been sent there on saturday and we could have just we didn't have to go there and go through the whole rigmarole of being you know you would have been calmer yeah i think well kathleen would have have been more chill, I probably would have been more chill.

34:50I will say as well, like when you turn up, you're trying to get this sorted. I think he felt like he was, he didn't agree with what it was, what was being, you know, the fact that we're going through what we're going through. I think the bigger problem came with the fact that, and I guess that it does come to, there's something to do with them. It's the fact that the rules of O2 are completely different. And I guess the dealing of customers is unimportant. They've got you in a contract. It doesn't really matter how they treat you. They can do whatever they want. You know, that's nothing against the two guys in the shop, the manager or the guy serving me.

35:22It's just the thing about someone like a company like O2 or B2 or whoever, you're the contract, there's nothing really much you can do. They they own they you're done, right? So it doesn't really matter about how they treat you treat your shit as they like. You know, it's the same thing with my broadband or anything. You're between a rock and a hard place as a customer. and they just yeah okay you seem to have got a bit resigned a bit grumpy about it so let's move on to something else now um but i do think it's this is no it's not so weird i'm hoping we get handset this is probably why i'm a little bit on edge because the thought of going away for on holiday with katherine without a phone number one is a worry but just as parents but number two is like if she's not got a phone you know phones become a very big she's got this phone at the moment it's so slow no i understand i understand and she she said today this morning she said god like i can't believe how much i missed like just you know having an iphone i was like yeah it was like we'd lost a family member yeah it was very much yeah very first world problem i mean it's a good it's a good exercise in sort of um it's a good exercise in living without your phone for a little bit, you know, maybe seeing, is this marriage a thing?

36:37No, I mean, we've actually, we've had quite a lot. I mean, yeah, we've talked a bit. I mean, I find that it's, you know, for me, it's easier now because I don't have to up my game quite as much. I'm not up against Molly May and Zoe Ray and the Kardashians and everyone else who she's got at the touch of a button. You know, my levels can drop somewhat. I can be a little bit more chill. Can I ask you a question? Are you aware that we're operating on a delay? Are we? Yeah, it's a pretty bad one, actually, I think. Is your picture crystal clear? No. Is yours? Yeah, of me, it's a view. It's you're a little bit blurry.

37:13Yeah. Okay. I mean, if I go, if I say, yeah, fine. But if I go, if, if I say one, two, three. Okay. So that's quite, that feels like quite a big delay, isn't it? Yeah, not on my end. It doesn't feel like as particularly, I don't think mine's just like, I don't think mine's delayed as you I think you've got more of a delay maybe it's tricky to know because I I don't know whether I'm being interrupted or it's just you behaving sort of as you normally do so it's it was difficult to ascertain the delay but I do think there is one I think there is now because your lips are moving and there's no sound coming out in the first part of the sentence yeah yeah okay there you go so unless you've worked out Mickey's taught you how to be a ventriloquist that you've been out there.

37:59Is someone sitting next to you? Is someone just coming and sat next to you? Yeah. The, yeah, the other thing I was going to say. You're so anxious. It's, it's, I can't, I'm so glad I'm, like, I can't do the podcast on this anymore. It's, it's so stressful. And, and I think, like, they're just, they've just left these people. I'm not supposed to be, this is not my office. So I'm sitting here in this conversation, people are coming in they're looking at me like what is he doing do you know what i mean are you in the lobby where are you are you in the hotel lobby i mean like this is but it's like supposedly like a common it is not supposedly it is a communal space but you're not supposed to come in and do a private broadcast here so like people are coming in with their families because it is disney i don't know if you're aware it's a family resort and so they come in sitting down and just watching me sort of to spout absolute trash into my laptop and sort of giving me a daily looking and getting up and leaving.

38:57I feel so sorry. Who's the poor guy with the phone, man? This guy's here and so on. Why are you being such a hard ass? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, maybe it's possible. So I was trying to figure out if you'd said hard ass or hot ass. Hey, hey, hey, hey, buddy. Hey, buddy. You never fucking lost a phone before? No, you bloody bloody, you've got to hear both sides. yeah i'm gonna do i i i very conscious of the language i'm using and the tone i'm using you know because it's it is the most family friendly place i've ever been to in my life yeah of course it's disney you're in the you're the mecca of family love yeah okay um i am i got we got an email in um not criticizing it wasn't criticizing in fact actually you you you're very

39:45yeah boy it's just died it's like plugged in and just shut down what completely what was happening during our chat is like it was just like basically going for its it's like throws or whatever it's completely done