S4 Ep 39: Oasis Highs, MAFS Beef & A Fiery Burrito

8:31Olivia Coleman:Well, it's got a strong smell of urine around where we were standing. Like some people are just, I think...

8:36John Lithgow:People are not pissing at no way. Yep. Yeah, that's the urine. That's, I think, one of the own downsides of it.

8:43Romesh Ranganathan:That's quite a big downside, sort of open cups of piss just sort of sat around.

8:50John Lithgow:yeah i mean yeah it does enforce your uh event horizon that would be that would probably be my opener to the story if there were just cups of piss around but you know what in credit to the people they weren't throwing them which that usually happens we've all got we've we've all we

9:06Romesh Ranganathan:all decide on how high the bar's going to be don't we for human behavior and yours is i don't mind you filling a cup with piss but thank you for not throwing it no but that happens a lot of those

9:18Olivia Coleman:sorts of concerts.

9:19John Lithgow:I don't think it happens. I've always been gigs. Does it happen to like metal, metal gigs and stuff?

9:23Olivia Coleman:Mate, it happens. I just gigs, right? Yeah, I've been hit by a volley of piss. I've been hit. Yeah.

9:29John Lithgow:Did you ever get pissed right on you on stage when you were doing stand up? No, I did get told to fuck off by an audience member who thought, oh, shit, that happened. I did download many moons ago and got hit by a bottle of piss. I know you did. Yeah, it was. I mean, you were at downloads.

9:46Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, it's tricky. I mean, Beckett and I were worried about that when we did the, when we did Rob Rommish versus Metal. Slightly worried that when we came on with Bleed from Within that we were going to get piss raining down on us, but it didn't happen, thankfully.

9:58Olivia Coleman:Yeah. Yeah, it's a weird gig thing. I gigged on Friday night. Lovely little gig, nice crowd. A woman in the audience did the loudest burp I've ever heard in my life. To the point it stopped everything. It stopped time. I've never heard a belch like it it came from almost like just right the pit of her stomach it was literally you know like Barney from The Simpsons yeah yeah yeah Barney Gumball when he yeah what? that's him if you know by the way Barney Gumball if Barney Gumball lived in England everyone would just call him Gumball wouldn't they

10:38John Lithgow:you wouldn't know who was yeah who's down the path just me and Gumball and he wouldn't be a character

10:43Romesh Ranganathan:he'd be one of ten people that do that sort of thing in fact he'd probably be the most straight laced of the group they call him sensible gumball

10:54John Lithgow:nerdy gumball he'd have definitely been at the ice he'd have been at the ice he'd have been

10:57Olivia Coleman:last night old gumball but um yeah uh she let out this burp and but then as a stand-up you can't not reference it because it it stopped the whole it was so loud so as you're sitting in the front row. And I was like, wow, Jesus, and that she looks so mortified. And then she tried to get the hiccups.

11:19Romesh Ranganathan:Well, she's just trying to save her because it's a humiliating experience. And so she's trying to protect herself.

11:25Olivia Coleman:Lucky enough, lucky enough, one of the acts was found it so funny, he knocked over all the lighting. So that then created a whole commotion. Okay, or he did it to save her. Yeah.

11:35John Lithgow:Yeah. Sounds tough.

11:36Olivia Coleman:Yeah, it was in a school. It was a gig in a school it's always a weird thing when you do a gig in a little school theater isn't it and you're

11:41John Lithgow:sort of hanging out in the classroom beforehand yeah i've done i've done lots of those charity gigs tend to be in a school because they don't want to pay for a venue understandably they don't want any of the money going out on the venue but um yeah that can be tricky i i um i had a weird

11:57Romesh Ranganathan:experience the other night where um this sounds like i'm picking myself up a bit but um i did a charity dinner thing the other night which was it was for war child and and the idea is is that it's sort of a bit of an anxiety dream actually on paper so what it is is they had like three houses of people that were gonna having dinner their friends you know friends and the houses are all like quite close to each other and you go and basically they pay you up with another celeb and you're the surprise dinner guest for a course so we did starters at one place main course another dessert another and you just chat and they ask you questions and stuff like that and then they pledge money like for the experience or whatever so i was i did i i was with russian conaty and that's a beautiful dinner guest oh mate unbelievable like absolute results to be doing the russian the uh the one of the others was uh john lithgow wow and um and you'll be very excited about this, Olivia Colman.

12:58Olivia Coleman:Oh, wow.

12:59Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah.

12:59Olivia Coleman:Collie.

13:00Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Well, actually...

13:02Olivia Coleman:Did you get to chat to them?

13:03Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, in between. As we walk in between, we got to have a little chat with them. Olivia Colman was most excited to see me because of my association with you, I think. How's Lifko? Because Lifko's in the... My boys know Olivia Colman as Tom's girlfriend.

13:20Olivia Coleman:Even though I've met my wife. How's Lifko? She's in Harry Potter at the moment, isn't she?

13:24Romesh Ranganathan:I didn't ask him about that because I don't know why I didn't ask him about that. But he seemed in good spirits. As I walked in, all the food was done by Ottolenghi. And in fact, Yotam Ottolenghi was one of the guys going around. So it was John Lithgow, Livia Kahneman, me, Roisin Conaty, and then Yotam Ottolenghi and Alistair Campbell, bizarrely, was the other one. Oh, my God. Wow. Jesus. I know. So then as John Lithgow got up to say hello, he sort of pinged his glasses across his face and into sort of a load of volovents and then picked his glasses up. They had cream all over them and then he put them on and said hello to them.

14:06Romesh Ranganathan:It was an incredible bit. Just an improvised bit in the moment.

14:09John Lithgow:That's so beautiful to hear someone on Lithgow's ilk doing something like that. Oh, mate, it was unbelievable.

14:16Romesh Ranganathan:And then for him to turn it into a thing was great. People were pissing themselves. I don't see how the evening gets funny

14:22John Lithgow:than that really yeah did you try and compete compete by sort of slipping over falling off the

14:27Romesh Ranganathan:chair or anything no no no no my my days of uh trying to go toe-to-toe with people are well behind me but um but i'll tell you what did happen that was slightly embarrassing because one of the courses they had um all of the courses they'd have like set questions for you and some of the questions are general and some of the questions specific for you and uh one of the questions was for me was, Romas, you've got loads of tattoos. Of the people at the dinner party, who would you get a tattoo of next on you? Right? And then I said, Oh, this is like quite coincidental, because I've just got a load of tattoos and my arms actually kind of wrapped.

15:06Romesh Ranganathan:And they said, Can we have a look? And so I had a suit jacket on. And so then when I stood up to take my suit jacket off, all of my tattoos were like dried and peeling. And so people were having dinner and i basically pulled out this fucking mummified rank arm it was pretty horrific the woman next to me was just like oh oh god like an old johnny yeah it's like they're really it's really dry isn't it sort of really peely and i was like yeah yeah i don't know why i did this

15:36John Lithgow:what sort of people are sitting there then what what what was this ilka people we're talking about

15:40Romesh Ranganathan:so it's just people that they'd invited like so the the three houses are chosen to like host they'd volunteered to host because they were involved in the charity and then they just invited people that they thought would be into it basically oh nice

15:54Olivia Coleman:how was the vegan food? so was there like meat and veganship stuff?

15:57Romesh Ranganathan:well it's actually another embarrassing thing that happened was they had vegan food it was really delicious and I was I just said to you my days of going toe to toe are behind me but I did say something that sort of brought the dinner to a standstill in an attempt to be funny, which was they had a chef that was explaining what the options were. And they were very kindly explaining to me what the vegan. So they'd say, and for the, for the, all the, most of the guests, you've got a blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And Romesh, because you're vegan, we've done you a da, da, da, da. Anyway, so that was happening at the main course, the dessert course meal.

16:40Romesh Ranganathan:And the, the woman that made it said, so Romesh for you, I know you're vegan. so we've done you a la la la la la and it was absolutely delicious by the way and then she said to me and i've got to ask you where's your mum and then i said and it wasn't in keeping with the level of humor at the at the dinner i then said i don't know if you've seen the news we've had to send her back and oh wow um roshin actually said to me roshin actually said to me i can't believe if you just said that.

17:12Olivia Coleman:That is genius, though. Yeah, it was bad vibes.

17:14John Lithgow:Oh, yeah, but I think that's the kind of vibe that they want from you. Yeah, maybe.

17:19Romesh Ranganathan:Maybe. But it was a slow road back from that. Anyway, this is all irrelevant.

17:25John Lithgow:So the point is, I had a nice dinner, killed it a little bit with the bants. And made some great money for an amazing charity.

17:33Romesh Ranganathan:I mean, like, they told us about what War Child was about, and it was a great thing to be involved in.

17:49Romesh Ranganathan:in keeping with talking about uh getting my tattoo like showing my tattoos and pulling out my scabby arm uh on monday i got two new tattoos i got this yeah i don't know if i can show you i got this mixtape that you can see here oh that's very cool yeah yeah and then i got you You can't really see it. Hold on, let me see if I can. And then I've got Kendrick Lamar from the Super Bowl on my arm. Oh, wow. But that's not the highlight of the day. The highlight of the day was the fact that I managed to convince Jim, driver Jim, to get a tattoo. And he has now got a massive tattoo on his arm. I couldn't believe it.

18:30Romesh Ranganathan:I felt it. What? He got unplanned? No, so the last time he'd gone, I'd said to him, why don't you get something? because like Paul Boxall

18:37John Lithgow:who does the tattoos is really good. Yeah, he's incredible by the way. I don't know that who's doing your stuff. He's fucking amazing. Yeah, he's so good.

18:44Romesh Ranganathan:So I said to Jim, like why don't you think about getting a tattoo? And he said, I've always thought about because his wife Sam is South African. Jim's Scottish. Shout out Sam. And he had this idea of getting like a flag which was half South African, half Scottish. Like it fades into, they fade into each other because they've both got the kind of the X. So he got in touch with Paul and Paul had designed him something, but he still wasn't sure. So on the way there, he was also feeling a bit poorly. So he's like, I don't know. I don't know. But anyway, as we arrived, he saw the setup and he's like, I'm going to do it.

19:16Romesh Ranganathan:So he's got it now, man. That's amazing. Wow. Good for fucking Jim. He's got a big, big tattoo on his, on his big shoulder, big muscly shoulder.

19:25John Lithgow:He's loving life. He's got beautiful big shoulders. Um, I wonder if the old boxer will do that.

19:29Olivia Coleman:I'm thinking of getting a Liam and Noel one. No, that's. should we wait a couple of days

19:38Romesh Ranganathan:should we just should we should we leave it a little bit before we commit to that because I know you're in the euphoria you've still got the wristband on but why don't we why don't we just chill why don't we just why don't we just bring that down a little bit and

19:54Olivia Coleman:I feel like I fell in love with musical again

20:03John Lithgow:you know yeah i can't be beautiful when you yeah okay can i say by the way liam what a front man yeah he's good he's good it's one of your hot it's one of your hottest takes

20:17Romesh Ranganathan:were they particularly i think i should go to more gigs and stuff one of the big worries about the oasis gigs was that um was that they because they'd like got together after like a long period of sort of estranged considering that they weren't giving it full beans but they from what i've heard

20:33John Lithgow:they're back to full strength what you do notice is of men of our age i think that the one of the

20:38Olivia Coleman:things that they did back in the day when you're listening to their songs and people have their you know different ideologies of what isis actually means but it's one of the few things actually what the when you listen to it was talking about mental health well before people from you know people i'd grown up before like before before podcasts podcasts started jumping on it and started making that yeah no no but you you listen to it and you think and also weirdly for me i was being there like there's certain songs where it throws you back to being 18 19 dumped or whatever some of the stuff you know the the pillars of your you know the sadness of your lives and thinking of so many of their songs that you know either sitting in a in a van going to work and all singing don't look back in anger but also just lying on your floor absolutely destroyed just having talk tonight on loop for you know and that is where you're like it's been a you know pillars of your life and and i suppose i i'd almost forgotten how much of an impression they'd made on my life over the years do you know i mean it was quite a nice thing to be a part of that and just watching people go mad and sing along and it was yeah well if you think about

21:45Romesh Ranganathan:like the way that music kind of hardwires nostalgia into your system like you sort of think about and that's why they say like music that you listen to between 16 and 24 is your most kind of loved music because it represents you going through the most mad kind of finding your identity times of your life and like you're young and you go in and you know you're having all these the maddest experiences or whatever and so then whenever you hear those songs it you're flooded with those chemical whatever it is that you felt at that time and it's actually quite it can be quite overwhelming like sometimes if i'm at a gig and they're playing playing you know the stuff that i fucking loved from that time and you know you you have that feeling of being young again almost i mean all that that whatever that is it's soundtracking like so your big life moments it's incredible man i mean music is so powerful for that that's why i think like it's it's good to i mean it it's good to keep listening to new music but there's something special about listening to music from that part of your life it's it's like different yeah i mean that's the thing and then

22:50Olivia Coleman:i sort of had a lovely thing this morning of uh getting up with little g and uh yeah we had chapelle rone's uh album playing and i'm not returning to him but watching grace run around and having pink pony club on loop and she know she started to sing now along to songs like that and it's just you know when she's dancing singing it's a very yeah up against what we do it's a fucking very cool thing isn't it like music oh music is much better than comedy music is much better than

23:21Romesh Ranganathan:comedy i mean i don't i don't think there's any conversation to be had about that it is it's not You're not even in the same fucking league. Oh, no. Like comedy is something like, if somebody comes to your best ever tour show, the best ever tour show you and I have ever done, like the fucking best, standing ovation or whatever, the next day they'll go to work and somebody go, how was Tom last night? How was Ramesh? Yeah, really funny. And then that's it. That's the end of it, right? You go to a music thing, you're talking about it for fucking years. I went to see K-Nope at the Royal Albert Hall.

23:54Romesh Ranganathan:I feel emotional when I think about it. do you know what I mean like it's it's just

23:58Olivia Coleman:I still think when Jay-Z played Glastonbury was one of the things that just even now can feel the feel it do you know what I mean him coming out doing that your gut your gut your gut it's one of my favourite it's yeah well we came out doing Wonderwall yeah into a mix that was fucking cool that's

24:18Romesh Ranganathan:I had a a not a weird experience but something basically I was out on Sunday right I went to watch Arsenal Man City. And that was my not drinking test. It turned out that was absolutely fine. I had a great time. I had watched the game, went for dinner afterwards. With Josh and Ross had a great time. Yeah. But I have this habit every now and again of saying do you know what I mean? And Ross, midway through the dinner said, I said, Yeah, it's just I felt like I don't know what I said. I think I said it should have been more positive in the first half, do you know what I mean? And he said, Idi Amin.

24:57Romesh Ranganathan:I said, what? Because why are you saying Idi Amin? I said, I'm not saying Idi Amin, I'm saying do you know what I mean? And all this time up until that point, he thought my vocal tick was saying Idi Amin after I'd made a point. Full stop. Yeah, like Idi Amin was somebody who was very assertive about his views. And so that's what I was trying to get across.

25:21Olivia Coleman:say quickly say in do me three

25:23John Lithgow:versions do you know what I mean and see if it sounds like what do you mean I think Arsenal need to be a bit more positive do you know what I mean I think Arsenal need to be a bit more positive do you know what I mean yeah I mean it's so different

25:36Romesh Ranganathan:I suppose

25:38John Lithgow:if it's in a busy restaurant yeah but then I

25:41Romesh Ranganathan:started to get nervous that that's what he thought I'd been saying every time but then it feels weird to switch it up I mean I might start doing it I might start just switching it and see if people pick it up. Do you know what I mean?

25:52Olivia Coleman:Do you also put a... Because I said, you know, Catherine always jokes about... Because that's what Frank Bruno sings. She always goes, you sound like Frank Bruno when you do that.

26:01Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, well, you look like Frank Bruno, don't you, when you do the make-up and stuff and do the role-play.

26:07Olivia Coleman:A lot of people loved it last night.

26:09Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Can we talk about, please, Tom, and I don't... You and I have not spoken about this off-podcast, so I'd love to get your take on this. Married at First Sight yeah have you had any exposure to Married at First Sight

26:23John Lithgow:this series the UK series Catherine's had it on I've watched a little bit

26:28Olivia Coleman:I've really had to sort of take a step back because I get really I get too involved in it as you know I start DMing people from the show yes I know you've got a problem I've watched a bit so I watched one the other night when I got in and I was watching it was the the couple are away he's really trying as hard as he can yeah okay that's it that's what that's what i want to talk about okay so can i say by the way i watch him it's very hard for me to watch him because there's a lot of stuff he does they're not in my relationship with katherine but my relationship with you and anyone else it's weird actually because i was watching it going i really

27:08Romesh Ranganathan:should think i'm thinking about doing a podcast with this guy why have i suddenly got that urge but um but first can i just say look i know that they work very hard on married at first sight i just want to make this very swift uh give you this very swift take on it it needs to be about half as long yeah they need to do half the episodes the episodes to be half as long it's it's insane yeah i get that they're trying to make it as long as they possibly can but But I do not need as many, the recaps and like the, just it's so long. It takes ages. That's my one criticism. Apart from that, it's incredibly addictive.

27:48Romesh Ranganathan:But so you're talking about Sarah and Dean, right? So Dean is this guy, for people that haven't watched it, Dean is, I think he wouldn't mind me describing, I mean, he describes himself as this. He's an overweight guy. uh very very uh enthusiastic and high energy um sarah is somebody literally these are the things

28:09Olivia Coleman:that i think it was aside the overweight thing i think this is how when flowing people would write about me as an act this is this is the stuff that's how i've described you in pitch documents

28:21Romesh Ranganathan:but um

28:26Romesh Ranganathan:but so he's like very enthusiastic sarah is somebody who um has admittedly said i've always like bad boys like guys that look like they've just come out of jail tattooed up to the eyeballs

28:38Olivia Coleman:i still that i still can't get my head around women saying that in this in 2025 what like they go on that show going i've been treated like shit i've had an awful time and don't get me wrong i'm asking her to like dean because i get the whole thing they're not i will say this by the way my my biggest problem with that as a show and i really enjoyed the show i think it's great tv i will say this that i got into a place of watching it a little bit like with a keanu reeves head on with the guy thinking oh people here are going to get married it's very evident that most people there couldn't give a fuck about finding anyone i'd say 80 of them are

29:15Romesh Ranganathan:there for fame i do i think that that is a problem when you've got a show like that i mean that's that's true of any show like that you look at the you watch the apprentice now and and half of them are trying to they're just doing it to get a better profile that's that's that's the nature of it you know that's why you pretended to care about cakes on bake off extra slice you know we We all do it.

29:32Olivia Coleman:Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold the fucking fire, son. I adore cakes. I would say there's some stuff I've done in my career that is fucking, but you've picked a fucking, you thought you had an ace there, mate. That was a joke of my friend. Oh, fucking. Me going on an NFL show and talking about NFL is, that's a buttfuck move. Me.

29:59John Lithgow:Yeah, when are you doing that? about three weeks

30:06Olivia Coleman:but me me going on bake off cakes or something cakes

30:12Romesh Ranganathan:I'm only taking the piss anyway any food thing

30:15Olivia Coleman:if you see me on a food show

30:16Romesh Ranganathan:yeah it's legit it's authentic but anyway that is going to happen and the producers of the show have got to deal with that in their own way right so that's inevitable but with the Sarah and Dean thing first of all what Sarah Sarah says I want somebody completely different. She doesn't want somebody completely different, I don't think. I think she wants somebody that looks like a bad boy, has tattoos, looks like he's, you know, her description was like, looks like they've just come out of prison.

30:41Olivia Coleman:Basically, you'd be a good match.

30:43Romesh Ranganathan:I don't think I look like I've just come out of prison. And certainly wouldn't want to think of the white-collar crime that I look like I've come out of prison for. Yeah, but you could have been in, I don't know, you could have.

30:52Tom Davis:You're after a prison bad boy. I managed to find a tax loophole that got my accountancy firm into quite a bit of hot water.

31:04Tom Davis:I was on the wing where they left the doors open because they knew they could trust us and just stay behind bars.

31:12Olivia Coleman:No, you weren't. You were on a protected wing.

31:17John Lithgow:The other prisoners had to be protected from us because it was so fucking dull. Yeah. Oh, God, fucking hell. You got caught without a count in case we were all the tattoos.

31:25Tom Davis:I tell you, I've done some bad stuff in my time. Don't you want me to? Listen, I work for Watson and Wyatt, and on one occasion, I was signing some documents. They let me a pen.

31:38Olivia Coleman:Has anyone got some hot water and sugar they can throw in my head?

31:43Tom Davis:No, that was funny last time when you singed me. That was funny. Yeah, obviously, I'd have quite a serious medical help for that. But it's all banter, isn't it? But no, honestly, they gave me the pen to sign the documents, only went in the old pocket. I had no idea.

31:59Olivia Coleman:to literally just see someone throwing themselves off the top fucking floor i used to go to argos

32:03Tom Davis:and clear it out they did have a pen left after i got to the crawley branch anyway going

32:11Romesh Ranganathan:anyway i think what sarah wants is somebody looks like they just come out of prison but they're really but they're actually you know respectful and treat her nice what she didn't want was dean

32:19Olivia Coleman:sadly can i just say by the way and this is where it falls down for me right and i get you making a tv show sarah is very you know and i think you're right but i think and she's very open in in what that she doesn't want dean right i look at it there and see how the implicate i've only watched a couple of episodes but when she when she's basically he said look it's just because i'm overweight and she was like yeah is that it's for someone like dean it's like i know he's gone on there and i'm gonna say i think he's gone on there for fame as well but what i'd say is that this happened a couple of years ago i think we talked about with the guy bob uh who went on and cried in every episode right yeah the the the long term you know the the fact is i i just think i think if you're gonna have if that's if that's the deal you're making then the people you get you've got to make sure that i don't know then it just becomes very toxic it's the the lesbian couple in there who i thought were lovely you know but you go oh this looks like it'll be nice and then when she turns around and says i actually think tomorrow we should just spend some time and or like I want some time alone.

33:24Olivia Coleman:It's like all of it, I feel, it used to be, you know, you'd have maybe one relationship like that, but now it feels everywhere, they're going into the honeymoon and there's no one you go, oh, this is the bit where I can actually go, oh, you know, love is a thing. It feels like it's like everyone's trying to make their relationship the most toxic and the most horrific before they've even fucking gone away together. And I think that's where the show's lost a bit, I think.

33:48Romesh Ranganathan:Well, I think that, you know, part of the problem is that people know that if they have a difficult time, then you get more screen time. You know, if two people really start to get on and then they're just having a nice time and they go out for nice dinners and stuff, then they're moving together and it's fine. You sort of cut to them. And even as a viewer, you sort of, oh God, okay, we know these guys are getting on all right. That's fine. Actually, what you want is you want to see the problems. But the thing is with Sarah and Dean is that Sarah has been slightly vilified by the public and people that are watching Married at First Sight because she simply doesn't like Dean.

34:20Romesh Ranganathan:and you know this thing with Dean is like he seems like a nice guy but he's made some let's let's put his weight in how he looks to one side he did a rap at the wedding right now oh yeah yeah he said it was a thing that he'd done for her he's he's not he's not he's not he's not done it for her he's done it as a showcase of this is something he does he also he also did a song at the wedding so I you know and I don't think he's a bad guy I think he seems like a really nice guy I mean that's part of the problem is he seems like you know or his perceived problem is that he's a really nice guy but the truth of it is is that is that is he is making the wedding about himself right in my opinion and i think those are those are fundamental errors he's made is those fundamental errors he's made and actually sarah has not it's not about how he looks entirely which by the way is fine if you're not attracted to somebody you're not attracted to somebody of course you know you can talk about whether she should have a more open attitude completely i mean i didn't see the

35:16Olivia Coleman:wedding but i will say he's gone into that going i'm going to be the the funny guy and i'll be the fucking loud one and if he'd been with someone who's probably a little less fiery and a little less sort of adamant of what they want if he'd been someone who's probably sort of less of an alpha in a sense he'd have probably run riot and made it would have been like the dean show for and that's why the show is brilliantly cast because he would have just made that whole thing as like it's him doing fucking raps it's him putting on a fucking show and he's got someone walking around going oh dean's amazing and that's what they you know that's why it's great yeah and

35:53Romesh Ranganathan:i i feel like um i think that i mean a lot of the comments i've seen on like the videos of it online of her sort of saying like you know she there's one bit where she goes they say what what could he have done to be more for him to be more attractive to lose weight and get some tattoos and she's just said that and and got totally chastised for it but the fact of the matter is it's not just his looks she finds him a bit cringe and he's got into this bit of a dynamic of going i'm a nice guy and i've never been loved or whatever sarah is allowed to not be into this guy

36:27Olivia Coleman:that's that's her that's her right i i i by the way hadn't seen the rap at the wedding and i the bit i saw where i was like you're doing like this is i think he again is just doing it for fame is when he's in bed and he starts barking. I'm like, you wake up and you're having a nice conversation. She seems like she's in a place where she was actually going, OK, maybe I'd, you know, a new day, new dawn. And then he started barking. So for me, I'm going, you know, you're, so I, if I'm between the two of them, I don't think she's necessarily there for fame. I think she was trying to find something else.

37:00Olivia Coleman:You know, I think he's gone in there without intention. And, but also it's edited together. Look what you're saying, right? What's the clips they're using? they're using clips of her being very horrible about him so as a viewer you're watching and going oh fucking hell she looks horrible i'll stick and watch this instead of anything so it's all

37:19Romesh Ranganathan:yeah the other thing that they say that i've seen in the comments is like what's she talking about she's not much to look at and you go well that's this is part of the problem do you mean it's like you can't you can't counter it by going i don't think she's all that it doesn't matter if she's all that or not to you the fact of the matter is she she's not attracted to him and i think it's all right she's she from what i've seen so far she's been quite polite to him she's finding him a bit difficult and maybe there's a bit of performative nature to the face that she's pulling and stuff like that but i feel like the whole thing's a bit icky man do you know i mean

37:50Olivia Coleman:like that like the the reactions can i say by the way if you want icky go back to people who are on the show fucking three or four or five years ago who are still trying to be relevant that's that's icky for me that's you know and also by way now sort of coming back and and having like laying into people are on it now it's sort of yeah i don't know if you take it for a show and that's

38:13Romesh Ranganathan:what it is yeah it's like don't take it for a for a scientific experiment i think would be my advice yeah when they say we've worked months and months to to find the perfect partner for you i would take that with a big pinch of salt

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39:30Romesh Ranganathan:my voice was not great. Not that I sang, but, you know, I was...

39:35John Lithgow:You did sing, actually. What? You did sing. Did I? You sang your meth song that you used to do. Oh, my God. You sang the meth song. I forgot about that. I forgot about that. Well, I shouldn't have done that.

39:46Olivia Coleman:I was very annoyed that that didn't make it into the cut. Into the highlight. That'll never happen again. No. Yeah, because what I love about these live shows is we're not recording them. What happens in the room happens. That won't ever happen again because it just happened so naturally. But it was a beautiful... Can I say, Amazing Belfast adored you. I will never go toe-to-toe with you on Spice again. It took me out of the game, that burrito.

40:09Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, so we had a burrito before the podcast. The show. Before the show. And it was an incredible burrito. Beautiful. Tasted amazing. Oh, my God. I can't remember the name of the place. It's opposite our venue. Well, that doesn't really help, does it? opposite the opera house whatever that burrito place is in Belfast unbelievable and big shout out to Dennis who went out and got us the burritos because Tom thought we were going to get mobbed if we went in there so Dennis got the burritos for us

40:45Olivia Coleman:you're such a little snake I'd love to have gone in there you're such a vicious little curse

40:57Romesh Ranganathan:anyway we had the burritos and they were quite spicy and um they were they were fucking fire boy yeah anyway i i actually was all right i mean i did think they were spicy like i thought they were spicy for a mainstream palate is what i would say but if you go if you're getting a spicy burrito you get a spicy burrito anyway what i didn't anticipate was that you were out of the

41:16Olivia Coleman:game for what two days afterwards my guts were just yeah the rings thing that talk about pebble guy the rings thing was biblical like biblical like oh yeah yeah the pebble was the pebble couldn't stand up to it yeah like okay let me say if you want something unsexy let's dance around

41:36Romesh Ranganathan:this because you know let's try and not get too graphic yeah you like to get you like i know you like to give a big visual description and you submit photos to the gram if you could but let's just try and be a little bit tasteful well i'm gonna be in their breakfast as they listen to

41:51Olivia Coleman:this i will say that arguably it's the least sexy thing katherine's ever seen it's me waddling downstairs and saying i ate a really fiery burrito yesterday and now i'm in agony and she was like oh okay how's belfast nice to see you poor poor woman i was it was very yeah and i could feel the fire it wasn't just I could feel it inside me what during the show no no during the show I was fine it was like literally from about 3 o 'clock that morning till probably about yeah probably midday two days after well let's

42:23Romesh Ranganathan:I don't know I don't want to give this as a spoiler but I think this is okay on League of Their Own last series we were given I won't give the context but let's just say we ate we ate we ate some spicy vegan wings right yeah and And I am going to say, I know you said I wouldn't go toe-to-toe with you on the spice. That felt like a fucking alien facehugger was trying to burst out my stomach after I'd eaten that. That was a chemical burn. And so much, so spicy, you actually, they won't put this in the show, you were out of commission for about, what,

43:02John Lithgow:10 minutes where they were trying to, because you touched your eye? I got something in my eye. It was absolutely fucking insane. Wild.

43:08Olivia Coleman:yeah um i should say a quick as well by the way apology it was nothing to the burrito but apology to as well i had to pull a gig very gutted about this week i've had a back problem which i'm trying to get sorted um and not through just having to paint it is a court was a corporate for back problems a lot of people are sitting here going ah i want to laugh i'm in so much pain i

43:33Romesh Ranganathan:told you this i did a corporate called have i got diabetes news for you so you know i'm no stranger

43:38John Lithgow:to pharmaceutical corporates. Yeah, so I was out of the game. I feel very bad.

43:43Olivia Coleman:I hate pulling gigs. For anyone who brought a ticket who went along, I got a lot of messages. Some are very supportive, some very angry. I get it, but I'm very, very... I didn't do it lightly. You were in a bad way, weren't you? I was not in a good way at all. I was in fucking agony. And then when the painkillers kicked in, I would arguably say that being on stage on very strong painkillers is not the one. Irresponsible.

44:04Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Yeah.

44:08Romesh Ranganathan:okay uh should we do some emails my g let's do it my guy okay this is more for you than it is for me as is the nature of a lot of these um hello you sweet souls i have a question about filming pilots and when those don't progress any further well you've come to the right place

44:24Olivia Coleman:if you i actually thought this was going to be complimentary it is complimentary it's

44:29Romesh Ranganathan:complimentary um i was listening to the wolf on rob rob bryden's podcast and he mentioned being involved in a pilot for a uk version of everybody loves raymond after looking up uh i saw that it won't become a full show so my question is are you told in advance there's a chance it won't be picked up do you still need to prepare for a pilot as much as you would for a confirmed show thanks lads regards the quizzical quokka ps takeshi's castle is getting a second season right so tom over to you my guy uh so it's a lot to unpack there uh yeah and some yeah i feel someone's

45:00Olivia Coleman:going to be very upset at the end of this. Firstly, no, I mean, yeah, firstly, you go into a pilot, I think you go into every pilot with the real hope that it's going to go to a series. I think it's never, I've never worked on anything that's a pilot that has, is a guaranteed series. I think it's always just you sort of, and there's stuff that I've done as a pilot, which I think's been brilliant. I've been involved in whether it's just as as an actor or, you know, as a writer and as a creator, but some stuff you go in and go, no, this feels amazing and it's gonna get a, this is certainly gonna get a series and it doesn't.

45:38Olivia Coleman:I think that it's, yeah, and it's a real kick in the teeth for everyone involved from the ground up, really, that when, cause actually, yeah, I'm not, this is a bit of Romesh thing to say, but I think like when you're, I think Romesh is a couple of examples where he's been very incredible at considering the crew on shows. And I think that's the thing that you sort of... I think when people work on pilots, a lot of people are hoping that it goes to series because I think it's not just about the on-screen talent. There can be people like heads of department that you've taken from... It might be their first job and they confirm then that if it goes to series, it's a big step up for them.

46:20Olivia Coleman:So I think there's a lot of people involved in it. And like anything, like you try and go for jobs or go for auditions, it never gets any easier if you've put in a lot of time, effort and love into something and it doesn't happen. It can be, yeah, you learn to sort of deal with it and you, I guess, I mean, I'm saying that as someone who's sort of in the midst of this very situation at the moment. but um yeah it's so it's uh and the everyone loves raymond i don't think that even ever txed i think we that was that was 12 13 years ago um which was uh um anyway and and as the takes you're getting quite sad and morose now oh yeah but it does make me sad i was thinking all the the the kicks the knocks but then there's some there's some that at the time are killers there's something that i've had where i'm like oh this is we were told it's going to go it doesn't and then you realize that you know that was just a step in you learning you know writing performance whatever Takeshi's Castle I think I'm fair in saying it doesn't look like there's going to be another series

47:29Romesh Ranganathan:the the the so the truth about Takeshi's Castle is is that um it actually it did very well um and like people liked I feel bad saying complimentary things about ourselves but the show did well our Takeshi's Castle did well unfortunately Takeshi's Castle itself didn't do very well um the the actual original show and so they they've stopped making them so the the the situation is is that if they were making more Takeshi's Castle you'd be seeing more of Tom and I doing our take on it unfortunately what happens is if you do Takeshi's Castle voiceover without Takeshi's Castle you get the Wolf and El and nobody wants more of that so that that's kind of where we're at with it so there's not there's not going to be a second series but with regards to pilots critical quokka first of all thank you for your email and it's very polite and lovely your email but um there's all sorts of reasons to do pilots and um sometimes a pilot is for you to find your feet it's actually useful it's not a proof of to the channel it's actually more of a kind of can we iron out the kinks in this before we and you do loads of non-tx ex-pilots and the fact of the matter is is that um you get paid for doing pilots so you are it's not like you're going and doing it for free and seeing what happens obviously you're hoping it goes to series um and you're disappointed when it doesn't but you're putting the same level of effort in as you would do if it was a series you've got there's a little bit of nagging kind of i hope this gets away and there's part of you that if you're really enjoying it you think oh this would be a shame if this is the last time i ever do this but um yeah you have pilots for all sorts of reasons you commit to them just as much as you would if it was a series um i've been involved in so many pilots haven't gone anywhere i've been involved in run-throughs haven't gone anywhere it just happens it just happens and like tom says you do feel for the crew particularly at the moment when i think you know less tv is being made or tv's in a little bit of uh i think it's turning around but tv's been going through a little bit of a barren patch you do feel for the people there are people that have been working in tv their whole lives that have left the industry over the last few years because of what's happened.

49:37Romesh Ranganathan:And like Tom says, you always feel for the crew. I do want to take the time to give a shout-out to production teams and crews and all those people that do those jobs because I'm sure Tom won't mind me saying this, we kind of work the least hard out of everybody on those shows, is the honest truth of it. And so those guys really work their arses off. So big shout-out to them. But no, there won't be a Takeshi's Castle 2. Sorry. Sorry about that. It's not up to us, though. Oh, Tom. Yo. Okay. I just want to share this with you. I've just got to find it. So at the Belfast show, as is the way with all of these shows that we're going to do, the second half is dealing with listener emails and people that are at the show who have come in.

50:22Romesh Ranganathan:And on the Belfast show, one of the emails we read out was from somebody called Sophie. Yeah, show up, Sophie. whose other half had not taken her out on a date, and she's very annoyed about it. And so she sent an email going, could you shame him into taking me out on a date? We read the email out, and then we said, Sophie, you there? And horrifyingly, there was no response. We then kind of tried to really get Sophie to speak up, and I think it was flirting on the edges of being awkward. Yeah, I agree. And so we assumed either Sophie had gone, or the email had not got down very well with her other half, which has happened in the past.

51:02Romesh Ranganathan:We've talked about it. Anyway, Sophie has got in touch.

51:06John Lithgow:Okay, okay.

51:08Romesh Ranganathan:Apologies for the delayed email. I'm Sophie from The Belfast Show, the one who nearly melted into her seat from sheer sweat and panic. I've never felt so many eyeballs burning into me in my life. When my email popped up on the screen, my husband hisses, holy God, is that you, Sophie? I thought it was comedy gold. he however was raging Tom was right I was seconds away from legging it to the bar silver lining though the embarrassment has earned me a rare prize my husband's actually taken me on a date miracles do happen sorry I didn't own up I would have loved a little chin wag Sophie so there you go that's what happened wow how do you well she was there yeah yeah so she was there but she was just horrified that we'd read out the email and I do think it's worth saying if you do email in it's incredibly likely that we will read it out

51:53John Lithgow:so There's not that many people emailing in. No. Yeah, I mean...

51:58Romesh Ranganathan:We get loads of emails into the podcast. What we don't get is as many emails into people into live shows. One, because it's fewer people. And two, because I know there's a chance you're going to get spoken to and people feel a bit unsure about that, which is understandable, I guess.

52:11Olivia Coleman:Well, can I say one of the most heartwarming things was the student, the ex-student of yours, who was in the audience and led to you singing your math song that you used to sing for the kids, which is beautiful, I'd say.

52:23Romesh Ranganathan:Well, he pulled out Tyler Cole, it was Tyler Cole, who's getting married very, very soon. We're invited to the wedding, so congratulations.

52:29Olivia Coleman:Yeah, very exciting.

52:30Romesh Ranganathan:But he unlocked a core memory of a song I used to sing to get people to remember the equation of a line. And thankfully, we had Rob Percy there DJing, and he was able to tee up the backing music, and I was able to give an impromptu performance. Yeah, big shout out to Rob Percy. He's going to be with us at all the shows. so that was yes it was uh it was an experience it was an experience you know what is beautiful

52:58Olivia Coleman:is you threw yourself into that singing of that mess song and it was actually genuinely you took saying it could be quite cringy and you made it really wholesome and fucking a lovely thing to

53:06Romesh Ranganathan:witness no that's very sweet but saying you sort of have to say that in order to encourage people to come to the future shows um but cynicism aside thank you for saying that i appreciate and sophie I hope we've not now got you into further trouble by reading out that email. I'm hoping it's all taken good. And I hope the date went well.

53:23John Lithgow:Maybe send some pictures of the date to the Instagram. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Tom went to say the email there,

53:29Romesh Ranganathan:but it occurred to him that he's forgotten the email address because he's got such little involvement with the actual administration of the emails and sorting it all out for the shows and sending it across and making sure we've selected the right ones and all of that. Tom very much doesn't dirty his hands with that side of things. He just sort of rocks up and reacts and kind of complains about what's been chosen and stuff while he sort of talks about how he's desperately needs to shit because of the burrito he's just had. So there you go. Anyway, that's a little insight behind the curtain.

54:01Olivia Coleman:Very, very true one as well. You'll see that in the up-and-coming behind-the-scenes documentary. Oh, yeah.

54:09Romesh Ranganathan:Actually, we thought we were just going to put it out for free, but Netflix have come sniffing around. They've heard there's some electric content being filmed behind the scenes. It's like the last dance. To give you an idea of how poor the content was, Calvin, the guy filming, said, I'm sorry to interrupt a private chat. And we're like, oh, we thought this was us being entertaining.

54:35Oh,

54:39Olivia Coleman:I love you. Oh, my God.

54:44Romesh Ranganathan:All right, Tomo, it's about that time, my G. Could you do us the honour of taking a sandal?

54:49Olivia Coleman:Wellington boots or sandals, baby? Both do the same job, but do they? Wellington boots keep you safe in the puddles and sandals, a.k.a. flip-flops. Great to flip on, flip off or flip on when you're going to the beach. Truth is, you reach for different things for different times in your life. Sometimes you need an umbrella. Sometimes you need a sun hat. What are you going on about, Tom? What does any of this mean? Guess what I'm saying is the tools in which we need to get through a day may change. The infrastructure in which we need to get through every day is the same. Be good, be true, be you.

55:32Olivia Coleman:Every now and again, something lights up the sky. And I'm not talking about the sun, nay fireworks. I'm talking about a moment. A moment where you can go, hey, I'm there. It's very easy not to be present. It's very easy to be thinking of, hey, tomorrow I've got to do this or next Tuesday I've got to do that. Shit, Christmas is coming. Better get some presents or even harbor thoughts of the past. Thoughts aren't always healthy. Badgey to be in a moment, to be there, not thinking of anything else. Just letting yourself go, letting yourself fall. like the song Free Falling from the motion picture Jerry Maguire is he falling or is he climbing same thing kids what I'm saying is this pick the moments sometimes you've got to think forward sometimes you've got to go back pick the moments when you're present but make sure at least once a day you can kick off your shoes no, keep them on the mud may be dry and just feel grounded just feel you just take a breath close your eyes and let the world hit you like a tidal wave

56:44John Lithgow:and remember you're enough for you fuck me fuck me another one that was like the end of

56:51Romesh Ranganathan:lord of the rings um thank you

57:00Romesh Ranganathan:thank you so much tom and thank you to you animal pack for listening to this little piece of crap we call the Wolf and Owl podcast. I look forward to seeing you at the live shows. Tom, you mentioned Free Falling, but you also talked about Oasis. So I'd love to hand over the song selection to you. What do you want to go for? Because I was going to pick an Oasis song, but it'd probably be too obvious for you. So as the Oasis fan, why don't you hit us up with something?

57:26Olivia Coleman:It's very hard because... But the song that really resonated with me last night is the Oasis song, Acquiesce. so if you will JT

57:36Romesh Ranganathan:could you take a set with that quiz thank you so much guys we'll see you at the live shows much love peace bye

58:04Because we need each other We believe in one another And I know we are going to uncover

58:16Josh Widdicombe:We're sleeping in our soul

58:27Romesh Ranganathan:If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all please email us at wolfalpod at gmail.com. That's wolfalpod at gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you. Mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.

59:03Josh Widdicombe:and are always flexible. Now to make a term on stepstone.de StepStone – find the right talent for all jobs.