#30 Tellytubbies in a Nightclub

21:43This is from a show that I went to in Edinburgh. Will I tell you now? I'll tell you now. It's called No Apologies. It was in Summerhall in Edinburgh. I saw a lot of shite in Edinburgh. And you often get asked to go along to things that your friends are involved with. And, you know, you just go and it's nice. So my friend Harry Clayton Wright, he's a well-known homosexual.

22:08Denis:Lovely name as well. Great name. Yeah, he's a big deal. So he's directing this show and it's Emma Franklin who's performing in it. And I didn't really know much about it. And I was like, I'll go. Why not? And genuinely was like walloped by it. Like very good. Very, very intense and thoughtful. Give us a little summary without spoiling it. So it's about Kurt Cobain. Okay. And it's asking basically was Kurt Cobain trans? was Kurt Cobain a trans woman in a kind of like philosophical way or a deadly serious way both in a in a in a we'll never know but if Kurt Cobain had been around at a different time might he have been different if he had a chance to explore that outlet was acceptable yeah because in the 90s that wasn't really possible so from the that's pretty interesting from the show does it like are they getting that from stuff that he said or stuff that they said yeah kind of from from the whole kind of personality and presentation and I think lyrics and things he wore and but it's also it's like it's not trying to convince you yeah that it's true it's just what if like what if and how would the world have reacted and what would that have and also he died very young so like is there something around that as to why he died so young it's a really really special show but it's beyond it's beyond that it's it's more in the 90s how being trans was talked about and how it was like can you think of anyone like publicly no even now can you think of there's about four trans celebrities like in the main main mainstream there is a fantastic guy called Stuart Millard I think he's on YouTube right he only has about 25 000 subscribers but he's got like a really dedicated audience but he goes through all the like uk tv and stuff some of it i didn't really even watch or wasn't even old enough to watch it yeah but like there's stuff in the 90s and we forget what a hellscape it was like it was horrendous like it really really was bad like there's parts where they're fun and stuff obviously but like some of the shots and some of the things people are saying it was not a world where that is going to be in any way like if if it is like even if it was let's say acceptable in the 90s it would be lampooned to death you know what i mean yeah it would just be taken in like a in a horribly like kind of caricature and a rock star yeah um so the show was about like what if it wasn't like that what if someone like that had the chance to come out and it was okay and how if society just was able to chill and just accept people what that would the impact that would have had on all the kids in the 90s it's such a good show and then it goes more into like emma she's trans herself so it's it's a bit more about her life as well and it's great really good i was walloped and like impressive fire yeah like a big like actual physical fire oh yeah like loads of really interesting staging and costumes it was live music it's great everyone was like i think sometimes people might take away from i don't know comedians or like actors and stuff talking and we can be pretty we can say things are bad and crap and i saw this and it was shite and blah blah yeah yeah and that's legitimately because there is a lot of bad stuff out there but it is the most refreshing thing in the world when you see something and you go i couldn't do that that's amazing like yeah it actually ignites you like and everything she did was like there's loads of bits of the show you could imagine they could have just simplified it and cut it out and made it easier the whole thing was captioned like subtitled wow on stage um someone pushing a button harry pushing about to caption the whole thing live like in tandem with her speaking it was coming up and when i was there there was a guy he was probably 80 in the audience and he he didn't i don't think he realized it was going to be captioned and I heard him coming up to them afterwards saying like I really enjoyed that he's not deaf but he's like hard of hearing and sometimes he doesn't pick up things so he was able to actually consume a show properly which very rarely happens I think there's a lot of things that do sign language sometimes which is great but a lot of people don't speak sign language but they just need a little bit of extra help so it was lovely just the whole thing was projected on the wall during the show it was great they did a really good job so I bought the t-shirts wow that's amazing that's Emma there your question I do have a question there's no way to segue into this after that profound you know talk we just had jump in what is someone sent me this to remain anonymous right but someone sent me a question and I thought I was pretty good what is the straightest thing that mark t cox does oh or if you want to rephrase it what's the straightest thing you've done recently and don't be afraid to um to you know say something that straight people won't like i encourage you to say stuff that they definitely won't like you can take as much time as you want to be alongside like do it as one of those like exercises where like it's like you know what's the first word that pops into your mouth like what what comes up the first thing that comes to mind is my my fashion today not this but earlier i was wearing a jumper and it was very tight yeah around the arms and i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and i said this is very similar to what the straight version of me would throw on it's a jumper I never meant to wear and I put it on today because I need, I might wear it next week actually, I need to have different things for recording here What would your straight alter ego be called?

28:32Denis:Michael Mike and Mark Mike That was one So wait, can you go into this? You're saying that The tight jumper These tight jeans that you have on These are not tight. These are falling off me. Wait, wait, wait. What? Because I threw it on and I didn't think about it and I didn't care. But I've seen gay men wearing tight stuff. What are we talking about? It's just... I need the bigger, the baggier things to be trendy. What else? I mean, I'm addicted to Huel. I'm non-stop on the Huel. Is that a straight man thing? See, that's what I want. I want you to, you know, explore this for yourself it must be right you must be connecting it somewhere

29:20i was passive aggressive the irony of to someone yeah and i did a little bit of a fake chat i'm watching my words now to someone who i don't like and i did a bit of a see you around buddy kind of talking and i'm you put on your your checkered shirt and left yeah i did a bit of bullshit talking what a bit of like posturing was that yeah i was trying to hold my ground against someone who was irritating me i put on a bit of a not very often but I can do it Would you say you were

30:11Denis:you were like you know acting the big man I was I was acting unfazed and I was very phased but I was trying to be like good luck mate Good for you Yeah not very often that happens Do you know today I was walking here and I spotted a man and he was walking against me and we had so much time to look at each other and then i got in my head and i do get in my head because this podcast now about giving off a vibe or whatever or like um coming across as i might be cruising yeah right totally confusing myself and i was walking along and this guy gave me the look right gave me the absolute look and he gave me such a look that it made me laugh oh that's nice yeah it was it was nice smile it was nice but oh my god like yeah it can be so intense it's so like i was trying to remain unfazed but i actually i actually laughed because i because i was like i suppose that's my version of um like not laughing his face i don't mean like that i mean you could nearly call it a giggle yeah it came out of me and i was just like holy crap just the situation no no it was it was more because he was he was like laser eyeing me yeah you know and i suppose there was some part from me going, oh, I'm being noticed.

31:33Denis:Yeah. Oh, yeah. Little thrill. Yeah. Little thrill. 100%. What else? I think that's all. I mean, I've had a lot of conversations about Coldplay. Yeah. With tourists. Do you pretend that you like them? Oh, humorous. You know, we got a lot of flack about your t-shirt last week. What t-shirt? The Oasis t-shirt. Oh, yeah? A lot of people are saying, oh, no. Why? We've lost him. When did you have me? What's wrong? No, I think there's nothing wrong. There's a little bit of a waste. There's nothing wrong. What else? I think that's almost the gayest thing you've done. I was afraid you were going to. Sex with that man on the street.

32:16Denis:No, when I gave that guy that hand job. I thought. I said things have gone wrong here for me. Yeah. All right. I think it's much harder for me to answer that than it is for you to answer that. Yeah, you don't have to. Well, I mean, that was pretty gay when I was having probably a little on-street stare flirt with a man. So that's quite gay. A cheat flirt. Actually, how about this, right? This would be a safer way to play it. How about you give me some potentials of gay things that I might have done during the week, and then I'll say whether or not I did them. Yeah, wanking off your man. Wanking off your man.

32:50Denis:No, didn't do that. Oh, someone mentioned, it was very funny, you knew about Kesha's new album oh period before i did i bet i have to say someone mentioned that to me too and i've never been prouder that was a big moment i've never been prouder um you're doing well yeah i do well you're doing well um what else is on your mind i've got things i've got different things on my mind um it is funny though when lisa goes away how little faith i have in dressing myself oh that's that's a that's the thing that's definitely on my mind yeah i found myself with 10 15 minutes passing and i was just moisturizing yeah and i thought who is this man can i tell you a secret i wore a big jacket in edinburgh yeah i never got so much attention really people were like you look amazing you look and it's literally a blazer but it's big it's funny i think i wore it in the photo shoot remember the huge big one the big shoulders big cream and like i started wearing of your shirts.

33:50People are like, oh my God, you're a superstar.

33:53Denis:When you're walking along and you're maybe not as... When you're a hideous... When you're a hideous hat. When you're a hideous pig. Right? When you're a little piggy and you're going around London, right? Okay. And you're going around and you're not... You're kind of trying to get a look or whatever and you don't really get it. Right? But when you... I think it's... Actually, do you know what? I'm going to rephrase this. It's more when you're feeling yourself. Yeah. Do you know when you're really feeling yourself and you're feeling comfortable in yourself rather than actually maybe even aesthetically looking good or whatever and you're feeling yourself whatever the street changes yeah it completely changes like you have so much more eye contact and you saw like smiles and everything like yeah bizarre and and i just wasn't uh i wasn't i wasn't used to that until at least it came along but a lot of that as well i think it's it's the irony of it right when you get with someone that you really like and you're confident with and whatever and they make you feel confident then you that comes off you right and so then you get more attention the minute you know Lisa goes away with the Red Power Ranger all that confidence goes away you know and no one will want you and no one will want me back to being biggie it's about the vibe if you're dressed up this jacket I swear walking down the street I felt rich but you were probably swinging around right rich and it cost 5 pounds or something but I bet you I bet you loved wearing it though oh yeah You know, if you're unsure of wearing something, it sends out a weird vibe.

35:19And in Edinburgh, like, God almighty, you have to, it's so easy, you get worn down and you feel like worthless and nothing. So you have to keep kind of trying to make yourself feel like you're meant to be there because so many people are fighting for a space. So I was like, I'm just going to dress up. I'm not going to say much, I'm just going to look good. And it worked, I think. Did you get much attention from this podcast? I did, yeah. Loads of people came. They were asking for next year, maybe. If you'd be around. We could do that. We could have a fine all day. Or I might never go again. Maybe we'll stay in Camden.

35:58I might never go to that foggy city again. What else do I have to tell you? I have news. Talking about dressing up. I can't talk about this too much. I got a new kind of a job. You did. I did, but I can't say too much about it. I have many lives. I have many hats. I have a few architectural hats And I've put back on one of my architectural hats Now I have a nice thing Nice project, nice job Completely separate to this It's very nice I'm like a different person for a few days a week And I dress up nice and I go in I hadn't been in an office for five years I've been self-employed

36:37Denis:What kind of an office setting is it? Gorgeous Yeah Beautiful Lovely right? Do they have like coffee machines and stuff? Oh my God, they have models everywhere, like models of buildings. Topless women everywhere. Models of buildings. It's gorgeous. It's very creative. It's very inspiring. There's people. A lot of browns. A lot of browns, a lot of beiges, a lot of carpets. It's really nice. It's really lovely. It's very like, oh, you know. and actually Edinburgh there's something about comedy we tolerate a lot of we kind of put up with horrible spaces there's no glamour like it's all so rough everyone's going around with their meal deals and like just depressed and I'm like fuck this I'm sick of it I want a bit of style do you know just a quick pause yeah what would you get in your meal deal do you know what now I've been cheating I've been getting the Huel oh you're upgrading as the main The 70 pound meal deal You're full You're stuffed I get the hule I get the pineapple For health benefits And then I get a smoothie That's loads of food Mark you wouldn't You could get yourself into awful trouble With that kind of concoction Oh yeah that is quite a mixture Pineapple milkshake And a hule That's right chef Dear Safe enough Yeah I just can't And a rotisserie chicken Or sometimes the little chicken bites The little chicken You know, I've never ventured for those.

38:08Frigerator things, they're called. They're nice. But yeah, it is nice. I noticed there's no more phones in offices. There's no phone on the desk. Oh, really? I hadn't been, I literally hadn't worked in an office.

38:21Denis:Is that a rule there? There's just no need for them. Do you remember like half of your... Oh, sorry. I thought you meant mobile phones. On the desk. Like your induction used to be two days learning how to use the phone and how to transfer over to Mary. like that was so sounds like you haven't worked since 1984 but like and I used to work in a university like oh my god half of the job was these little bits of laminated papers with extension numbers for Mary in finance and oh she's actually gone on leave now so it's another number and it was so complicated I'd love to see you coming in your first day putting up your Rolodex on January and now it's like oh they just have teams I'd never used teams before I know people are they live their lives on teams I'd never used it it's very nice how are you finding it did you have did you have work fear I mean there's loads to learn I had a lot of you just again you just have to kind of bullshit a bit and just just believe that you you know what you're doing until you figure it out but you know that thing like I think it's especially in the arts and stuff or people going back to work you know like that have been out for a little bit or whatever I think it's I think it's scary I think it's scary going back into those into those things I definitely think when we get older as well we hide that massively because you're meant to do it you know but you're like about to get sick yeah but it's just like accepting I can't say too much but it's like it's okay to not know what you're doing yeah definitely for ages unless you're a surgeon and just be honest I'm like I actually don't know who this is that you're talking about but I'm gonna look it up and I'll come back to you in a few minutes but that's it it's about being kind of proactive about it right Because when you're younger, you pretend and you kind of lie and you smile and nod.

40:08I'm like, well, I don't. Of course, I don't know. But I'm just going to read something and I'll know in a minute.

40:14Denis:I think that's because when you're younger as well, you're also just kind of led to believe, maybe by the people around you, that to not know is a disaster. Yeah, like, of course, I don't. But when you're older, you're just like, I don't know and I don't care. Yeah, I work on it. I'll get through it. Tell me how to do it. Yeah. So that's nice Put on my little shirt So how's the work-life balance going? I'm steaming non-stop Steaming shirts Steaming trousers Yeah it's good I mean it's only a few days Here and there So it's not It's not like Full time I also think No one works full time anymore Like I'm watching the team She's in Tuesdays He's going home Half day Wednesday Like there's I didn't work My last full time work Was before COVID So it was nine to six every day sit in that chair don't move um but like a little bit of playing around with hybrid stuff but it didn't exist really i have an office job and you know they're taught like people talk about oh we should do a four-day week we should do this do that whatever yeah it's like nobody works on a friday yeah and if they do they don't do anything yeah everyone probably does their i'd say people actually do the most of the work on probably like a thursday at the end of the week when they have to do it.

41:29Denis:And they do it in these concentrated chunks and stuff. Just let people go home. You know what I mean? And they'll pick it up. People are so much happier when you have this feeling of being able to leave. Yeah. You know? Oh, I just want to say, I think we should both start watching the traitors. Ireland traitors. Oh lord. The Irish traitors is coming out. I'm very interested. I hope to god it's good. I really... Now why would you say it with such trepidation? Because these things I have I've seen some of the promo I think I think it's starting off on a good foot I hope do you know Siobhan Maximini she's hosting she's very good and she's good do you know why she's good because she got out and she came to England and she did load the TV in England and now she's coming back she's kind of like a star like she's a big deal sometimes these shows they're presented by someone who just does everything in RTE and it doesn't feel special, but it feels like Marty Whelan, does everything so it feels special to have her so I hope, I'm going to back it, and we're going to watch it and we're going to talk about it If there was like a world championship for the worst parades we would win Parades?

42:49Denis:Parades, tone parades I know that's a bit of a hard left turn, but we would win, we are awful at putting on we're the cringiest parade throwing people in the world did you watch the Rosa Trillie parade no be very careful I didn't they do a parade for the Rosa Trillie oh do they the competition I was unaware through the town night time yeah were you at it no they just wave in Trillie like yeah through the town was it a good parade no so why are you asking me to be careful then well do you know some people it's just a lot of discord course about the Rose of Trillie. Whether it should be happening or not.

43:27Yeah. And what is it? And it's not our place. Why can't we talk about it? Because we're men. Can I talk about it? No. Why? Do you know what I also want to mention? The Hose of Trillie. Do you know about this? The Hose of Trillie is a competition run. So the Rose of Trillie, for the international listeners, it's a... Christ, I don't even know.

43:49Denis:Just give the definition without being worried about it. It's a pageant. It's a pageant. and there's each country or state or city is represented by someone and there's the best person is picked there seems to be no entry or no like restrictions on who can actually enter it as long as you come from somewhere right come from somewhere it has the counties like Cork Leitrim all these but then you'll also get like the Wisconsin Rose yeah yeah yeah what the hell are you talking about but they they'll have a connection to Ireland basically so there are ambassadors for Ireland in different places I guess but then the Holes of Trilly is run by the Wild Geese do you know the Wild Geese they're very good they're comedians cabaret people oh wait wait who are they the Wild Geese no but what are their names Brida and Laura Lavelle oh yeah I did gigs with them before yeah they're very good and they do cabaret and burlesque and things so they do like a spoof it's great and it's actually like what Ireland actually is and it's like wild women kind of letting loose and it's just a bit feral and sexy because the Rosa Trillie is very I'm a teacher, I'm dressed up nice and it's such a one type of person and then the Rosa Trillie is every type of woman Did you ever think about becoming an escort for a Rosa Trillie?

45:06No, I know a few people, they're all gay Really? They get like a man to guide them around but a lot of them are gays which is probably better you know, they could just have the crack probably but yeah that was on I think they did it in the Sugar Club in Dublin and I think it's like a recurring thing it looked great it looked like wild

45:26Denis:are we talking about the Hose of Trillet the Hose of Trillet oh the Hose of Trillet yeah Domain the Hose of Trillet and so you you think that the Hose of Trillet should be banned well I don't I don't think I have anything to say about it but there's a lot of discussion about it like people they just love it they love the tradition but it's awesome maybe just like maybe a bit of an upgrade here and there, you know? Yeah. Like... And they do, like... And the contestants now are, like, they're doctors, they're scientists, like, they're impressive people. Yeah. But it often still comes back to doing a lovely dance.

46:01Denis:I'm sure what's wrong with it, Mark. I'm sure what's wrong with it. I don't know. And is there anything wrong with... I can't say anymore. ...with baking bread and having a dance? Oh, sure, they're all lovely. I think that's it. Should we go? Yeah. God bless. Put in my submission for an escort on the roads of Trilly. Goodbye. You're probably too old. Shut up. Goodbye. Goodnight. Okay, that's it. Thanks for listening to your internet boyfriends. Goodbye, Dennis Lynn. Goodbye, Mark Teacocks. We have a new episode for you every Thursday. You can follow us on Instagram and TikTok and you can email us at yourinternetboyfriends at gmail.com and we'll see you next week.

46:36Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Thank you.