#51 Heated Rivalry and Buying Tampons - w Yshee Black

0:00In Aldi, did you say? You're such a snob. Little. It wasn't little. It was brand. It was a brand. Okay, fair enough. I was getting everything there. I was getting the bread, bananas and tampons. Welcome to this week's episode of Your Internet Boyfriends. Hello, Marty Cox. Hello, Why She Black. Hello, Marty Cox. This week we're talking about the Golden Globes, heated rivalry and selling smelly shorts on Vinted. And we'll be talking to Why She Black as she helps us solve our relationship problems and how to get rid of your friend's boring partner. Right. So yeah, I nearly melted And we had to start again Definitely the atmosphere has come down by about 10 degrees So that's good Internally But you see, I think I'm getting I think I'm getting sympathy symptoms Because there's a lot going on at home Or there's flushes in the home There's a lot of panic this week This is the week This is the week The roommate and the girlfriend They have become one They have synced up I have to say two of the cleanest houses in the country at the moment tearing around the place but that's a symptom that would be a symptom I wouldn't get that I wouldn't get that one down myself as a sympathy symptom she woke up the other morning she said will you turn off the heating there was no heating on Mark day one the hedge got taken out can I tell you about the hedge what do you mean day one there'd be a lot of to be very project based on both sides I thought it was take to the bed that'd be that'd be usually day zero that'd be the day before oh right I don't know for the coming storm but no the next day then there'd be a lot of gotta get gotta get something done you know okay jobs so there was a hedge taken out taken out like yeah absolutely taken out and then afterwards was wondering about how we might reinstall the hedge okay which I don't know if you know about hedges but once you kind of take a while to come back and you have to join in and you have to match this energy when it comes around I'd say yeah go with the flow it's like go with the wave yeah you know what I mean but you're you see isn't isn't that one thing no that you're just thankful for don't have to worry about that yeah don't understand that yeah you don't have a kind of a i'd have friends obviously but i think friends when that comes around every month probably pull away and i wouldn't even realize like there'd be friends there'd be girls and they might just not turn up to a party or something and you mightn't realise why it is.

2:24But if you're in a relationship, you kind of, there's no escape, so you have to communicate. I think as you go on, if you're living with someone or if you're going out with someone, after, like, I think the first three, four, five months, maybe, it's kind of a little bit more under the radar. A little bit more. Yeah. And then I think it starts to kind of, you know. Yeah, rightly so. Rightly so. Rightly so. I walked out a little yesterday with a packet on top of the bread. Oh, of course. I walked out proudly in front of all the traffic. You can say it out loud. Don't be shy. What is this? Packet of what?

2:55Packet of... What is it? A big packet of Tampax. No. Aren't you very brave? Walked out yet. I think we're moving mountains here. I think we are. For men. Maybe I've gone wrong. Maybe I'm wrong. Yeah. Could be wrong. Could be... Might be wrong. Probably wrong. Good chance. I feel like tampons and Tampax and stuff have gone a little bit like Gillette Mac 3. Why? How's that? Do you know some of them are like... They seem to have all sorts of things on. The designs. Yeah, you know, big wings and like all this kind of stuff. And, you know, like not a drop to waste and, you know, like all this stuff.

3:31Yeah, yeah. It's the same thing with razors. Like, as in, you know, it's, you know, we don't need four blades, five blades, six blades to keep adding stuff onto it. You think it could have been perfected by now? I'd say, I'd say surely, like, right there. You know, I'm sure there's a little bit of variance, but, you know, guess. I'm sure there's expensive models. Yeah, I'd say there is. Cheaper models. Fancy ones. Well you're very brave Very brave I'm very proud of you Very progressive man Yeah Congrats Inality did you say You're such a snob Little I was in little Okay you wouldn't It was brand It was a brand Okay fair enough I was getting everything there I was getting the bread Bananas and tampons It was flying Yeah You know Got the whole thing Big rewards Got a little offer on Little Plus and everything Yeah Oh you got the card Yeah I finally got a club card In co-op The co-op Oh there's something Happening in there Is your co-op a little bit like that?

4:22Drama? Oh my god, yeah. Co-op, I'm going to say it into the camera. They've lost the will to survive. I feel like co-op are about to just evaporate and they've given up. Yeah. Every shop is the same. They're just not the staff. It's the upper people have just given up. It almost has the kind of feeling there that there is no upper. And the thing I don't understand about co-op as well if like people have never been into them if you go into Tesco or whatever when you put in your stuff and you like scan your stuff through in the self-service it will say you know don't forget your club card or at the end then it'll say thank you for shopping in Tesco or something like that the co-op machines are talking all the time have you noticed that?

5:05Oh before you go up to them? Just there's just announcements inside there all the time and there is and I think that the voice is a lad from Northern Ireland have you noticed that? No So you go it's it's unnerving right I'll even say it a Northern Ireland accent just appearing out of nowhere is unnerving. You know, especially like kind of a Noori one or something. It's like, you better take your messages. Don't forget your milk. And you're just going, oh my God, who is that? And it's a self-service machine. In the hostile co-op, very bad. And I have no other choice. It's the only shop beside me.

5:38But it just stresses me out and I feel so bad. And it's also now they have deliveries. So I buy all my shite online and that's because if I get stuff delivered to my house, it gets stolen. because we have a thief in the lobby. So, oh, there's pictures all over my lobby of thief. Of the guy. Don't let this man into the house. He's stealing all the ASOS. It's so hot. Where do I live? It's very intense. Don't let this man into the house. There's pictures in the lobby. So we have to get everything delivered to co-op. And then that's another job for the people working there. Have to go and collect from all of us arrogant, obnoxious, like gentrifiers who are tapping our foot for our ASOS deliveries.

6:17speaking of arrogant obnoxious gentrifiers that's me you got AirPods I got AirPods so this is another reason because everywhere I go is so loud and annoying and stressful so I got AirPods but they're the they're the air cancelling air what are they called noise cancellation oh my god it's like not living in Dawson anymore is it I'm just yeah it's it's incredible I'm just flying around can't hear anything it's lovely but then when I take them out everything's 20 times more yeah frustrating than it was I like to pop them in and have nothing playing because when I walk down my road I know everybody so oh can't can't stop on the move I'm on a call yeah you can also fake it I just touch my ear sorry touch your ear like an old taxi driver with a Bluetooth thing no I just want to say right you do bring up purchasing very expensive stuff a lot on this podcast no no no but these were a gift okay good thank god these were who got you these these were what's the word what's the word Is sugar involved?

7:17Yeah What's the word? Not a donation A donation A donation? To what charity? Me Okay Yeah And where did you How did this go? I'm just a nice man Who pops up sometimes Sends little presents But sends very like Where's my nice man? Yeah We'll get you a nice man I'd love a nice man Very like Things that you'd need Do you know like If your father was like I was just going to say Like a father Yeah yeah But literally like What do you need? So I got runners one time and like I don't know a bag or something stuff that like not luxury but things you kind of need but they're a bit expensive Jesus do you know what happened to me once I was I was with this I was with a girl over in America and I was just working at a bar earning no money just like on tips and stuff and I came back and I had mentioned at one point oh I need to get shoes or something she was a bit mad she bought your shoes she came in with shoes this is desperate but I shouldn't tell the story.

8:16Go on. She came in with shoes, a big huge pizza, right? And then I was heading out. She earned tons of money. Yeah. Right? I was heading out with the lads and, you know, we had, we'd eaten the pizza, let's say. Oh yeah. That stage, right? We'd eaten the pizza. She said, hold on there a minute. She gave me$100. Oh, good boy. Shoes, pizza, and$100, right? And I walked outside that door, Mark, and the door kind of, I was waiting for the lads and the door slammed and it was like wind kind of blew up against me and I thought you're a sex worker yes do you know well I'd get more than$100 Jesus ah yeah but I did get a pizza and a pair of shoes yeah so I think all in all considering it was like dominoes yeah it's probably worth$300 yeah great I mean you earned it well it's alright Grant yeah $100 too low and you go out now you enjoy yourself you've earned it put that don't say a word about that you take that don't say what about us our big sorry I don't know why you said that our live podcast is coming up on March 5th but we've got some good and bad news the good news is you can probably get a ticket the bad news is you probably can't get a ticket if you were a group of 12 I'd say you're out of luck yeah if you're one or two maybe but you're going to have to go online and check but go get your tickets it's probably your last chance if you're listening to this at 6 o 'clock in the morning on a Thursday A little pussycat wig You know I love it Do you know what a pussycat wig is?

9:49I have no idea what that is What's a pussycat wig for? Just a very like Small short wig It's not like a lace It's like a shango So you just pop it on Yeah Out the door Yeah out the door You literally pick it up You pop it on What's it What's it What am I Because there's So many different styles of wigs Big massive Big wigs And you've got like Human hair wigs So something that's going to take you A long time to put on No It's going to Like two seconds It's like a hat so you literally just like pop it on then you start a little bit and then you go it's so good of you to boil it down to it's like a hat yeah it's literally just like a hat do you know what I love when people talk about people in drag wearing a hat yeah but they mean a wig yeah so if you see someone in drag and they have a big wig yeah you say that's a beautiful hat that's a beautiful hat I don't know why that's so funny to me or they love like a unit like a unit and we love your unit it's just a wig come here can I introduce you yeah of course the twos and threes of listeners who might not be familiar of this very famous woman this is why she black who is an actress oh yes an actress comedian an actress a comedian would you say a drag superstar yeah singer no lip-syncer dancer um i can do two steps two steps yeah you look lovely this you kind of match the orange like the little details on your shirt you know i thought if If I'm not going to be in drag, then I'm going to be a homosexual.

11:13I was actually going to even go gayer than this. We've loads of things to talk about. I think kind of urgently, quite serious. We need to talk about the TV show with the bums. Before we get to it. Oh, don't. Before we get to it. Because everyone who's listening knows exactly what we're talking about. We do, yeah. Can we just lead in from the Golden Globes just a little bit? Oh, yeah. It's connected. they were there yeah yeah so golden globes jesse buckley yeah love jesse buckley jesse i really need to see the film i remember jesse from um when she did what do you call what's it alpha no the um the scene competition would you what would nancy nancy when she was in the competition to be nancy what is it andrew lord weather was doing it yeah is it what's that called would you do anything or do yeah yeah yeah i'd do anything i'd do anything for you yeah i remember from that and she came second base i'm not gonna age myself here i'm not gonna age myself here but it was like at least 20 2010 is that where she came from yeah that's where she came from she lost out to jodie pranger no no yeah she came second but not as a kid as a well i mean yeah as a young adult yeah oh i didn't know that bit yeah so she was like in the singing competition she lost out to jay day i think she was in cabaret as well yeah she was yeah she the first she was one of the first yeah the london cabaret yeah yeah um she's great she's great and she's remained a humble irish woman i love that she's very uh she just takes it all in her stride she's very i genuinely think she doesn't really care about the fame and the gas no yeah it's work but like yeah she's been able to do good work and show up and like i need to watch her the new film about Shakespeare.

13:03And I think her and Paul Meskell, they do this thing where they acknowledge this is a job, and I'm out here being wheeled around for a few weeks because I'm on a promotional tour for a movie, and then I'm going to disappear again for a few months. And I never see people acknowledge that and say that. I feel really famous and everyone's looking at me now for a few weeks, and then I'm going to go away. I'm not the most important person in the world just happened to be now for this little bit of time Paul Mesco's Irish yeah when he was doing Gladiator I think he was a bit he was nearly like a bit embarrassed about all the attention yeah he's like this'll go away I know you're sick of seeing me it's work it's work I'm doing my bits yeah I do like Paul Mesco if you have a look at the trends this week as well they're saying I'm looking up actual search terms and it was like Jesse Buckley Golden Globes that was one of the big ones and then like one of the second or third ones was Jesse Buckley husband people trying to find out who the husband is because she doesn't reveal no great it's called Freddy

14:15sorry Jesse why she Buckley but it's yeah it doesn't reveal who it is it's kept it hidden he doesn't go to like the golden globs and they have a kid and stuff the funny thing about it is like she's from Kerry so you could find out in two seconds kept it a secret wow and do you think people at home have decided to leave him alone as well someone at home could do an expose yeah but would she have to tell people to be like shut up leave it out you know oh yeah definitely but like fair enough it's her it's her job yeah I wouldn't be I wouldn't be able to be as big as him I'd have to be on the red carpet oh would you oh I love that 100 % I would not imagine that she's She's done a film with Paul Meskel for four months.

15:00No, she's in the red carpet. Yeah, you'd have to go and stand next to her. Are you jealous? Oh, come on. I wouldn't be jealous, but I'd like to be there. You'd like to be there. Like, yeah, the perks. Do you know? Celebrate it with her. Yeah. Kind of, but also let me do my thing and don't let me be worrying about you when I have to do all of this. She wouldn't be worrying about me. There'd be a little bit of... Would you bring your partner? Do you have a same-sex partner? Are you single? you no single single yeah if you were married would you would you bring a partner along it depends it depends if they'd want to come or not but like i would have i wouldn't mind i'd be like yeah but like you'd have to stand on your own two feet yeah like especially like with me i'm like i'm a yapper so i'm gonna walk around the yap and talk to people and but there's nothing more attractive if i see my partner also talking to somebody else just across the way and i'm like yeah yeah so i need that go and yeah you have fun we're sat at the table together when the food's ready we'll have a natter about that but you go have a laugh because i've seen situations where people who are important and they're having a big night and then they have a partner and they waste loads of time trying to look after the partner and then they're like i want to go home or whatever and it's work like you're there to talk to as many people as possible and be whatever way you need to be in the public.

16:25I'm very good in a room. I can work a room. You abandoned me when we were working a room before. I do, yeah. Yeah, he abandons. That was a test. A test, you ran off. Make sure. I was talking to a woman. I didn't want to talk to her anymore. He was talking to a woman with about six glasses of wine about some museum or something. I have to pop off a second and ran. I didn't want to. I think she's right. I don't think you would bring your... We're very... So there has been times. So I have a same sex partner. No. I do. I didn't know you had a partner. I do. Sometimes mysterious. You are very mysterious.

17:02He's there. And we have gone to stuff together. But also I'm like, you do your thing. You know, I don't need to be here. And if it's in a totally different industry, I don't want to have to be a bit of a nuisance and be kind of, you know, in the side of the conversation. I kind of love it though. I mean, like Lisa does stuff that is completely my OSP Lisa does Opposite sex My Lisa Lisa does stuff that is completely out of my wheelhouse Right, right, right And even my accent would say that I am not from this area of industry Hush people Hush people Hush people I kind of love it I love walking into a room and she has to go off somewhere and you're just talking to someone Yeah, just talking You know I have a podcast Yeah and you like it you do does anyone like podcasts well I think people are more open to talk to you as well at those events though because they're there to talk what about if your partner was in the same industry and was trying to piggyback oh I couldn't do it no imagine if you were have you ever dated another no sister dick will make you sick absolutely not oh my god I would never oh another cross dresser Can you imagine an up-and-coming queen following you around?

18:22Oh, give me the axe. I couldn't. Absolutely not. Slipping into heaven into the dressing room. Can you share even materials and stuff? Wouldn't it be cheaper? Yeah, but if they're up-and-coming, then they've got nothing. So they have nothing to offer me. You know what I mean? I need to upscale. You know what I mean? I need to find someone who is at the same level or higher than I am. and then we can have a joint sleigh. That's if I wanted to get with a crossdresser and that's absolutely not. Why wouldn't you get with someone who's like pulling the same pole? Because we see each other too much already in the clubs and stuff and like there's just no, when are we going to have our like downtime or when are we going to like go on a night out and we're not surrounded by people we all know?

19:13You know what I mean? Like where's the separation? if we're both doing it you know and i think i need i need to go if i go to a club then it's all right if people know me but it won't consume the night if there's two of us and they both know us it's a wrap it's an absolute wrap have you seen it in the dressing rooms what just like someone bringing along yeah there's a new piece yeah oh always like drag queens always have like well some always have like their partner yeah be their assistant as well so they double up so like drag drag rooms are just full of a drag queen plus one and their partner but if the partner also is trying to work up crazy crazy there might be something else in there might be a dancer or a producer okay i've seen that okay or there's like a no theatrical this is dragon drag no i I think that's rare.

20:12Is that rare? Is there any famous couples? Drag couples. No, it's not rare at all. I've seen it happen. My drag mom had a drag, part of a drag couple. It went up in flames. But for the main time, it was great. But yes, it does happen. But I just... You might get a queen and a king or something. You might get different types of people. I've never seen... Oh, yes, no, I have, actually. I'm going to say that I've never seen that I guess I have what if it was two people trying to do the same thing you have to be on the same wavelength about life as well because like the club can be very consuming and like if one's a party animal and one isn't then that's also you've got to you've got to manage that as well well again you don't want someone saying I want to go home yeah exactly and you're living exactly you might both either want to go home or you both want to stay out for a little bit you know what I mean but there's no one reining it in yeah there's no one reining it in that's probably why like i go for people who are outside of like um the drag scene yeah because like my my ex-partner couldn't give two tosses about drag and i love that yeah literally when we were first i date they're like i don't care about drag i was like oh you know i've been on tour with these people or i've met like these drag race girls go on say the name and they're like say the names i'm not saying names okay you know like elissa edwards mo heart you know just like big names drag race girls yeah um and they couldn't care less but when i told them i don't don't come down with me oh my god you you would have thought i'd told them i've been to the oscars like they're like you've done come down with me wow that's amazing i love how much have you spoken about come down with me and how much are you willing to talk about it right now no yeah I've never spoken about it.

21:59When did you do it? I did it like during like 2021. So no, but my friend was, was actually doing it, but I was the entertainment. So like I came in and they got me to like lip sync to like, I'm every woman in like this garden and they're all dancing and having a laugh. And, and he won. Yeah. Of course he did. Did you perform for four people? Yeah, I did in a garden and surrounded by cameras in this big, massive place because it was like lockdown it's the it's the series where they put them in a house oh no you know what i mean so it wasn't their homes so they put them in a house and they got them to like rotate but it was like this big massive place and i was like is it done in one take or are they are they kind of it's a few takes but i wasn't there long i swear i overall i was there for like an hour an hour and a bit i don't know yeah in and out and he won and they won yeah did they defeat you or anything no yeah they gave me some crisps they went you can have some crisps you want i went i'm all right thanks i don't think i saw this no it's doing the rounds it is around someone someone commented the other day i was like i've seen not come down with me those things they rerun them yeah they do years later yeah oh i was addicted to come down with me i watched so much of it yeah i just put it on in the background i think it's just like nice to like i much prefer when they invite the entertainment to the venue rather than say oh i'm gonna play the tin whistle for you know for yeah no yeah i agree it's usually the worst even if they're quite good I think production wise they set it up so they sound terrible and they're just like hopping away on a keyboard they made me sound great so I was fine it was great because that could have been grim yeah it could have been if you were in a little kitchen little bed sit but seeing a drag queen I think that was the main thing they were like wow there's a drag queen here and they're performing for us and I went yeah you've won before you started yeah we started I didn't even see any of the meals that like my friend cooked or anything I didn't get to see a thing I just turned up you just kept out the back yeah literally get disgusted around now yeah very that very that so we're talking about big golden globe winners oh yeah what else won adolescence won loads of things yeah adolescence that was great that feels like so long ago it does it does yeah it's had some time we started the podcast a year ago and I feel like that was out in our earlier episodes yeah it was wow but it's still within the season I suppose yeah and the keynotes they did great they did really well your film Weapons won oh your one what's her name fuck have you seen Weapons no I haven't but like I hear it's great and I hear like what Gladys or something it's a character it's like iconic like I need to and it's not it's not one of those movies where people recommend it and then you watch it and you're like I have no idea it is actually a quality movie okay I will I might watch it tonight the actress who played Gladys I can't find it oh crap I might watch it tonight but also that feels like years ago that was like the earlier yeah no so long ago bit of that season summer anyway but I think the biggest winner is last night the two lads heated rivalry yeah the two lads my listen can I just say now that's a very quick turnaround whoever is planning the Golden Globes because they did they give the award to Jesse Buckley I think they did I think they gave it no no they gave it to the adolescents who did they give it to it was females it must have been I think it was the adolescence actress did they give an award?

25:26I don't think they did yeah they presented an award they presented an award and it was like to a female yeah so like whoever planned that schedule obviously someone was bumped out yeah it's only just become massive and you know what seat they were at they were at like the biggest seat in the place so they're next to DiCaprio which you know whatever about that but you know it's in the Golden Globe orders and they were sitting down like Charlie XCX I think Timothee Chalamet as well they were at like the big table they had the big table they've been skyrocketed yeah and then and they have to bump two people right so you must have thought oh I'm sitting with Charlie XCX and then you say no no you're actually no actually we're going to move you across who was presenting the award that got sacked that's what I'm wondering that's true too yeah because actually they're going to know who's presenting what ages ago surely yeah that's crazy that industry is they have skyrocketed but to be fair the series is great did you finish it of course I did this is a sky blue alright of course I did Did you binge it?

26:22Yeah, absolutely. Well, I was doing it like weekly. So it was coming out weekly. Oh, okay, okay. Oh, you were honest. Yeah. With the American. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. I'm terrible. Because it's only just come out in the UK. It's only just come out. But I'm glad that everyone, like people are getting on it because it was just great. Yeah. At first I was like, I was first episode. I went, it's all right. Yeah. I was second. It's all right. And then I got to the third one. I went, oh, okay. Like, I love this. This is great. That's what most people have said. that you have to hang on to the third episode or after.

26:49You finish it. So, I'll let you go next. And then I'll give you my thoughts. No, come on. Because you told me I had homework to do and it was go watch that, right? A lot about sex. Go on, go for it. I think they never intended it to be so big. No. It was made in a month. Yeah. They filmed it in a month and it was meant to be just kind of like a thing and it's enormous and it's great. And I think the first two episodes are a little bit slow but they get you in and they know there was the thrill of the butts that'll get a bit of excitement and then it shifts to become a very nice romantic powerful gets really deep it's like a completely different four, five and six are like a totally different show really different show really deep very tender and then it ends it ends I feel like it ended nice and tidy and wrapped up I don't think they had any intention of having second series I don't think so either

27:55is the Russian guy actually Russian? no but he got signed only like a month ago or something he wasn't even properly signed it's made in Canada you love it so I'm going to really make some leaps here I'm not going to tell you what I think of it yet right so we I think you're going to see it as well are you going to see Kinky Boots with me yes yay love Kinky Boots so we're going to see Kinky Boots in March yeah and the guy who made that is it's going to sound like a different guy but it's not Harvey Firstine I think okay is that what he's in oh you know you definitely yeah yeah I know he's won like a million Tony Awards he played he played the the gay guy in Mrs.

28:41Dotefire oh if you can you know he's got this he's got this voice yeah he's gay gay Broadway gay gay yeah not small but like you know he's got he's actually got the reason his voice sounds like that is he's got this thing in his throat and it basically gives him a double voice so when he's talking it's like that's what gives him his cool voice anyways but he he wanted to write stuff he was saying that didn't like kind of gay stuff that didn't culminate in um like a suicide or like kind of like a big dramatization of just being gay or whatever yeah sorry so then am i correct in thinking that all of this stuff is just like great because it's just about yeah it's just being gay you know like it's very different and which is great because like so many stories like just trauma and just trauma trauma trauma and it's like we get it we understand it's very dramatic but like do all of our stories i have to be once someone dies or someone's not gonna make it or i'm like come on let's like let's have something that's really that's just different and also like i think it's also for me i love like queer media and gay films and stuff like that so everyone's really fixated on like the coming out part of things and it's very rare that you you get shows that actually deal with like queer life as it's happening and as like you've accepted yourself and you're you know going through life it's very like there's very small pool of like film and tv that actually do it so it's actually nice to see a heated rivalry actually have that i know they went through like 10 years very long time very long time very questionable time because they were acting like they didn't know each other six years in and i like this is weird but we move yeah but to have that like scope was really great to say it's very rare no one died yeah no one tested positive for hiv there was no abuse no there was no sex work there was no drag no there was no scene in a nightclub taking drugs and having an overdose yeah none of that what else could we have had there was so many things that they could have thrown in yeah yeah they just didn't because the trauma of just living with the secrets and yeah that's enough yeah that's it is enough and like to just navigate in that yeah yeah i did i did i did get annoyed that it was like they were still like talking like they'd only really just met like by episode five and i was like come up like come on let's let's like have some why does that annoy you because they're texting all the time they may not see each other text all the time but when you text you you do have like a rapport and like yeah you get to know someone a bit more so they were doing that but then when they saw each other like in person i was like hey yeah do you want a sandwich yeah maybe like come on like give me something you know i mean you've been texting this person and plus like he's been digging you out like for over how many years you're telling me you're not just gonna be a little bit comfortable it's sometimes that's It'd be more awkward though, no?

31:52No, not after five years. Come on. I think it'd be more awkward though if you have sex in a bubble and then you meet them later and you can text, you can be all confident. Then you actually meet them at like an event. You can be like, I'd give them the benefit of the doubt year one and two. But not six. No, absolutely not six. I should have said. Yeah, but especially if you're meeting more and more progressively, you know what I mean? Like you've got to have some walls. I know obviously drama, drama's sake. I loved when they went to the cottage. Yeah. Which was. Iconic. A five bedroom mansion.

32:27Yeah. The cottage. That was very awkward. That was very believable. Wait, give us an explainer for those of us all. So Shane invited Ilya to his summer home to spend like two weeks together. And the pressure of like that going well and actually having time together on their own. So when he arrived, it's so odd. And they're standing against the wall. And this is how, you're like, do you want a sandwich? It's like, we obviously want to have sex. Yeah. But should we or should we do something nice? It's kind of coming out of the fantasy. It's like, sometimes I have situations and I'm like, we're there and we're small talking and we're making cheese plates and things.

33:12I'm like, we need to get to it. I always say to you about that, it's like you're saying, oh, you know, that's a medic guy or whatever. and I'm just going like I couldn't it's just like this administration stuff of all the small talk would kill me I just couldn't do it but I think that's because they had there was weight there was a risk if they spent two weeks together they mightn't actually like each other that's often the problem if you have a new relationship and you go on holidays or something there's a worry that like maybe this is only working because it's forbidden I think I think the amount of people that break up after holidays is insane.

33:50Yeah. Did you get to that episode? Did you finish it? No, no, no. No, no, no. That's coming up. It's very good. I got to episode three and you told me to watch it. Love it. And I approached this in the completely wrong way, right? I saw two lads on the cover playing hockey. And I thought, I can't believe Mark is watching this. I know, the sports throws you. Yeah. It throws you a bit. Oh, cool. And I heard that it was about their journey through the sport and I was like oh the Russian US thing I'm like I'm into that like let's go for it and then I made the worst mistake ever of inviting my roommate to watch it oh I mean and she sits down shift it yeah I know but like she was I know but when you it's like showing someone a video on your phone and you make them watch it or whatever you know it's just the two of us in the house yeah and I'm like oh this is meant to be great you know and it's like 9 o 'clock we've all had a day and we'll sit down and she's just going oh is this oh what am I doing this is a bit oh god there's another arse but the arses reduce after episode four there's less of the gay sex well yeah of course because now we're getting to do emotional territory you see i think the first three were to hook yeah to hook the gays and then take us on the journey if anything we were kidnapped any other critiques as a as a real homosexual any other critiques um not really i really like i think i like episode three a bit more because they actually speak about their feelings i think is that the one the hockey guy and the barista the new the new people yeah they speak about their feelings a bit more yeah and like i love the communication i think like that's great and i think as gays we need to communicate more but yeah that's for another day um and i think the juxtaposition of having the other two not talk about anything around me i was like are you gonna speak actually do you know what today's the day what do you mean what do you mean about communicating as in like um telling each other how you feel in the moment and like not being scared to open up a bit and i think like doing in a respectful way that also isn't like gonna like jump on the other person and be like oh i'm too much you know what i mean it's funny because i would say that the the straight narrative is that gay people gay men would definitely be very open very open yeah were you saying that really no yeah yeah it's not the guys well with the two main people yeah they're both closeted so they're both traumatized and like in a foster but with the two others the barista and the hockey guy one of them is out yeah so he's kind of pushing it like tell me how you feel yeah I found that was great though have you ever had a rendezvous with the discreet no i haven't no no i haven't could you do that i mean wait sorry i'm lost what what does that mean because the hockey guy was not out he wasn't out oh i disagree okay okay um i was very rich if he was very rich yeah you just changed the game completely you've absolutely changed the game this because that was so interesting like it was so perfect as a situation yeah the barista is obviously struggling absolutely and falls if he was rich i think but also like i am like for my sins i am quite like loud you know like so they'd hear you coming they'd hear me come in and i don't know how i'd react to them like being discreet yeah and i'm here like I've got you know a cowboy hat on and earrings with cowboy hats you know what I mean like this is gonna sound really suspicious but how does one be discreet you know do you have to establish it episode 3 he's not out no one knows he's gay so that means he's discreet so that means he's about being gay he doesn't tell anyone he's like acting wise like if I if I was gay but I'm discreet and I'm not out and I approach a guy yeah how do you say like by the way you can't tell anyone because i i think you'd have you it would it would just have to come up in conversation as in like you'd have to flirt first and then get a little bit of communication going and then if you felt like it was worth saying actually i'm not out that's when you go from because that's your bit it's a personal thing and it's like a lot more personal than like i think people realize especially me because i'm just like la la la la la la la la so i'm fine with that but i think saying you're discreet is like the first a first step into something yeah you know what i mean so i think you have to be comfortable with that person well it's where you meet them you're not going to meet them in a gay bar yeah you're going to probably meet them online it will be very clear from a very discreet anonymous secretive profile it'll be it's very common again my imagining of this is like back in the day in some sort of movie you know what I mean like you know the office worker in New York oh like in person yeah you know what I mean but then you have to say no actually nobody knows about this yeah can't that be quite insulting for the other person then I mean it depends if they accept it or not yeah because it is quite It's quite common in the community.

39:20Some people love it. And also, like, even in Hollywood, I think there are loads of discreet people around. I think it's really common in London, people who are from London, who live with their families. I think that's really common. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Around me, like, there's loads of people who just haven't figured it out. And they're a bit stuck, and they can't. It's easy to run away to the city. Yes, exactly. Would you say, like, not really discreet, but, like, even coming out to family and stuff like that. I know like so many like out loud, proud, but you know, we're waving the flag. But like, you're not going to tell Nana across the table at Christmas time.

39:55You're not going to tell like the uncle. Do you know what I mean? But like on the streets, we're cat, cat, cat, cat, cat. Oh my God. Yeah. So you still have these certain little boxes. Yeah. Yeah. But then if you get stuck living at home, that's the problem. Yeah. You're kind of always reduced. Yeah. Who else won? I think that was all the news. That was all the news. but if you would help us we get some listener questions in. So would you help us with our listener drama? Of course, absolutely. I didn't read what this is so I'm generally blind. I didn't tell you either. You're going in blind. This is great.

40:29I can't wait. So we have been helping them out every week for the last little bit. Mostly homosexual. There is one more thing because you actually mentioned it with Prince and Boy. They died 10 years ago. I think Boy's was like a few days ago. but 10 years ago but have you seen the thing online though where everyone wants it the Gen Z wants it to be 2016 and 2026 that's their thing like we're generating so much crap that we have to go back 10 years instead of 30 years so they want us to go back to 2016 where was why is she black 2016 2016 where was she I was I think I think I just I was working at like Cineworld yeah I don't know that no in Birmingham I'm home working in Cineworld I'd finished uni I graduated in 2014 and so I was just like trying to find myself actually I think I started drag wigs I just started early days early days I stole my mum's church outfit stop it from her cupboard to go out to the club and perform was that your first yeah roughly oh my god how did that look huh how did that look it was a it was a purple jacket with a purple skirt and my friend she's my drag mom now put me in makeup and we did like Alexandra Burke and Beyonce and we were a pair called Chocolate Milk she's white and I'm white so yeah and who did you play in the I was Beyonce obviously let's not let's I did a church outfit yeah I think that was a great time that was a great time in Dublin Panty Bliss do you know yeah no Panty Bliss was doing that number with Bunny love and I think watching people performance in drag was better than the real.

42:17It was so, do you know that performance? It was on X Factor. Alexandra Burke won. You know that on X Factor, when they bring on like a celebrity singer. Well, Alexandra Burke had Beyonce come on and they did like listen together. I can't believe what did she say. I can't believe I'm about to say this right now. It means like Beyonce. It was iconic. It was like, take me back. Yeah. Honestly, it's the ancient gay text. It's great. So 2016 was good. Yeah, 2016. See, you're falling into it now as well. What were you wearing? What was I wearing? Day to day. I think I was wearing more outlandish clothes still.

42:53I think I was still like, I think, was Topman still around? Yeah. Slightly, yeah. So I've got loads of Topman gear, chinos. The mainstream at the time. Yeah. Men were wearing bomber jackets and skinny jeans. Skinny like washed. Oh yeah, skinny jeans. They're not skinny. You can't get him out of these. Do you think they're not skinny? I mean. These are tight ankles. Look at this. You get three men in here. Do you think it's somewhere between those or am I going towards that? I mean, just jeans. Jeans, just jeans and nice loose jeans. You know what I mean? You're hot because your legs can't breathe.

43:27There's no ventilation. Lisa, are you listening? Because she won't let me enlarge the jeans. I have to get them. All right. So we're on to some listener dilemmas. Okay. Right. This comes in from Ava. okay not a gay man no oh my god no I don't want to presume but we've diversified yeah hi Dennis and Mark right and Moishi long story very short my friend is going out with an asshole I love I have I have shortened these messages a little bit because they do go on yeah right I love my best friend but I cannot stand this man he's an energy hoover oh god should I say something or let my friend work it out that's from ava oh i have very strong opinions okay i i would just well what's the groaning about what are you just don't beat it's hard because like you want to have fun and if someone's an energy hoover it's just like come on but you can't really say anything maybe say something to the friend but have you ever been in a situation where you've been with someone and then afterwards you go oh like it's over they were such a like this and that and they go yeah And you're like, why didn't you tell me?

44:43Why didn't you say it? Because what if they stay together forever? And then you're stuck having Acknowledged you hate him So you wouldn't say it? I don't think so But I wouldn't go out of my way To bring him in Yeah, very that Very that So we'd exclude So instead of having the conversation We would exclude over time I wouldn't well yes because remember we're handing out advice here now so you're saying to Ava start excluding the partner from events I mean what it's like if Ava's like having a girls thing you know what I mean like just have a little girls thing you don't need you don't need the boys around you know what I mean you don't need the boys around so it's a no partner or yeah or you bring other friends to compensate you know what I mean so like if I know someone's going to be an energy hoover then I'll like can I bring my other friend who I know is also like a lot of energy uppers so we both have something to go by so we're equaling it out I think it's hard though energy hoovers even at like a dinner table or something it's very hard to contract them do you have people that you know but like I have some friends and their partners are a bit like that but it just gets understood they probably don't want to be here nobody really wants them here leave them at home it's fine yeah but they they must feel the pinch a little bit surely when when all right well like i mean you would have had previous relationships right yeah so then those people would have been invited all the time and then suddenly you know peter's not being invited okay well then well then we need to tell the friend that yeah you need to tell the friend that you think their partner's an energy hoover and then let her deal with it.

46:38You could lose the friends. Yeah. You could lose the friends. No, no, but like if you're... Oh no, it's so hard. I would nearly let it run its course, assume most relationships fail. And then let them know. And then just let it... Don't help the relationship along. Just let it roll. you see not to age any of us right but I think back in the day you could look at a relationship and go well there's so many years left in the relationship run here that this will this will evaporate I don't think it's the same thing now no you know I think they could get stuck I think a lot of friends don't like their friends partners yeah I think that's fairly common yeah it is and they're forced together now and then but get the girls together leave him at home yeah you know we haven't considered maybe Ava's a bit of a yeah maybe you know maybe Ava's a problem maybe looking inwards it's also a thing yeah I wouldn't bless me project out I have no problems whatsoever yeah the problem's not me and then with the gays it's tricky because it's less clear yeah I'm going out with the girls because often if it's two gays they intermingle yeah the friends might be all kind of the thing yeah that's true that's tricky so what are we landing on here i feel like we've we've fallen into an awful gray area i'd dance around it i'd say nothing so you're saying dance around and exclude over time i'd say nothing i wouldn't go out of my way to involve him hope that it fails i would say i would say try and look for some positives and make small talk but also if you feel that like they're starting to suck the fun out of the room then maybe change the conversation or like leave the room or do something different like you know what i mean like don't let them talk too much yeah because i think if like some people they don't know they're sucking the air out the room yeah so they continue to talk oh i can i know i can i can be misery so i know to stay away like often like if my same-sex partner is going out to drinks or like particular things I'm like I'm going to be misery because I don't drink either so I'm like you just go you'll have so much more fun off you go I'm happy to not be there wow and that's actually that's adulting yeah that's adulting yeah that's great then you have to wonder why you're with the person oh wow wow wow wow wow wow wow we're questioning so coming up next week I'll be here on my own with Why She Black launching our new what do we call it what did you call it chocolate milk chocolate milk revived revived thanks very much okay that's the end of that now thanks for listening to your internet boyfriends you can watch this full episode back in HD on YouTube and we'd love to hear from you if you want to drop us a message with your news or your saucy stories, you can get us on Instagram or TikTok or you can email us at yourinternetboyfriends at gmail.com.

49:58Off we go now. Very busy. Bye-bye. Bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye, bye.