#457: ATTRACT the Wins You Deserve With Heather!

0:00I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, you're going to chase down our goals, We'll overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. That's a no-see. I'm ready for my close-up. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me this week. So it's been an interesting couple of weeks with a lot happening. And I can't say I'm shocked. I can't say I'm shocked. As you know, I work a lot. I've always got a lot of irons in the fire. However, we're not in control of when they come to fruition, right? We might be seeding these different business ideas, different partnerships, different opportunities, but we don't really know when everything's going to come in.

0:40And it's just so interesting to me when it does happen. I kind of try to take a moment and say, what was I doing during these times, right, to reflect on what was happening? And I do believe that a lot of it has to do with the energy that you're putting out there. And for me, having so many of my dearest friends come in for my birthday and, you know, like really through a two-week span of time, I was in the best mood of all time and so excited. And I think that that does impact things. I really believe that the more you can put yourself in environments around great people who have your back, who you're excited to be with, that you're doing fun things with, you're just putting a better energy out there and better things are going to start happening for you.

1:23And I forget about that a lot because I get in the grind and you know, get so laser focused on working. And listen, there's lots to be said about working really hard. It does pay off, right? It pays dividends. It works. But at the same time, it's important to have fun and be around great people. And it's interesting because I was reflecting back on how it used to be for me when I had a lot of toxic people in my life, whether that be in personal relationships, at business, at work. And it changed my way of thinking profoundly. Let me give an example. And listen, I'm far from perfect. I fall back into these old patterns sometimes and I have to catch myself and say, wait a minute, this does not pay off.

2:02This does not work for me. That's past behavior. We're not going to go ahead and spin that up any longer. Bye, leaving you in the rear view. But it's good to work to get rid of those patterns. So one of the things that I used to do when I would be around negative people is think more negatively, right? And I would say, oh, if there was something I was working on that I was really optimistic and hopeful was going to come to fruition, sometimes I'd say like, oh, I'll celebrate it when the baby's born. That was something I would always say back when I was in corporate. Let's wait until the baby's born before we get too excited.

2:34Let's not get excited now. By the way, I completely changed the way I think now. And it's been a lot of work to get me to do it, but it works. Meaning I hit every day with, of course, it's going to happen kind of energy, right? Absolutely, this is going to happen. I'm so excited about this deal happening today, even though I still don't know if it actually is. I just believe it's going to, right? And the more you get excited about it instead of worrying about it, the more you're putting that energy out there, the higher probability it's going to happen, right? You create the environment, the opportunities, and the situations.

3:07And when you start thinking that way, you start looking for solutions. You start looking for ways to make that deal happen. what I realized now is back then I was always hedging my bets and I was doing that because I was around a lot of negative people that didn't want me to succeed that would try to sabotage me and set me up. And so I got used to this idea that, oh, you know, could completely fall apart at any moment. And that became normal. Well, that's not normal, right? So if you're in an environment, you're around negative people, oh my gosh, overcome your villains, fire your villains. Like this is your reminder right now, get negative people out of your life.

3:39Now, as I mentioned last week. I got triggered last week because some people were reaching out to me on my birthday that I didn't think should. And that's all on me. That's about me not allowing other people to trigger me any longer. And actually, one of the interviews that I did for the show, you're going to hear it in the next couple of weeks. It's about bias. It's such a great interview. It's with a man that wrote a book about bias, got into the neuroscience around bias and how to unwire your mind not to be biased, which is incredible. And I was in this interview with him learning from him.

4:11And I was thinking about my birthday and how I got triggered by that person contacting me. And he was talking about how you can rewire and reprogram your brain so that you don't. So you disconnect that situation that occurred a year ago. I don't need to be getting upset about it anymore. It's over. It was a year ago. We can move on people. And I had moved on, but I allowed myself to get triggered. It's reconditioning and rewiring that, okay, I feel upset right now. Wait a minute. I need to remember where I am right now. I'm safe. I'm not in that situation. I'm not in some argument, right? Like that's all very distant memory, taking a deep breath, being mindful, writing about gratitude, you know, whether it be praying or meditation or going for a workout, doing something to break the pattern so that you get yourself out of that mindset and you can teach yourself a new way.

4:56And I guess that's the message I want you to understand is that just because you were doing it one way for a long time, which I was right back in corporate, I was hedging my bets all the time. Don't talk about it till the baby's born. and now I do the opposite and this way works much better. It's really having faith and belief in what you're doing and that things are always going to work out for you. And if they don't, you know, one door closes, a better one gets open. So that's even better, right? Like it's all working out all the time. And when you start embracing that and believing that things start going better and your brain starts focusing on ways to make things happen, which in the alternative situation, you're kind of closed off because you're preparing for it not to happen.

5:36So just asking you to be mindful today when you go into situations, when you go into your day, what is it that you're thinking of?

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8:52I just look back at the last two weeks and how excited I was for life and for all of the gratitude I had for all the people around me and the celebrating and how fun it was. and then all these incredible opportunities came. I can't get into all of them yet. I'm super excited to tell you, but these are things I've been, some of which I've been working on for a couple of years, right? That just are completely coming to fruition right now. And literally the day after my birthday, it all started happening. And this is another important thing. If you know, everything can change in 24 hours, right? You can be working on a deal and a partnership for a couple of years, not knowing where it stands, not knowing, you know, what's happening.

9:27And then all of a sudden And in 24 hours, it all comes together. That is real. That can happen, right? Because it's not just what you want. It's what that other party and that other partnership, you know, their timing might look like, their needs might be, their, you know, wherewithal to handle a new partnership or alliance. And you're not in control of any of that. You have no idea what's going on on that side, right? So it was just super exciting to see all of these incredible opportunities that came to fruition. One of them is so relatively new. I haven't even met the team or the people yet.

9:55I'm actually leaving tomorrow to go meet the team in real life. This is something that came together so incredibly quick. I can't even tell you how fast this partnership just came together. So again, to the point that, listen, some partnerships, some ideas, some business plans, some business ideas might take years to actually come to fruition. Others can take a month. Again, it's about being open to what feels right, like trusting your gut, trusting your intuition, knowing your skill set in what you bring to the table, doing your due diligence on other people, seeing where there are synergies, where there's weaknesses, where there's opportunities, like what makes sense for you and those other people.

10:34And when you come together and collaborate and partner with other companies and other people, there's massive opportunity, right? Because no one succeeds alone. We talk about this all the time. We need our own teams. We need our own support teams. We need our people behind us. We need our people beside us. We need our mentors ahead of us. Nobody succeeds alone. It takes a village. And it's so important that you pick the right people that have your back that want you to succeed, that are complimenting you where maybe you aren't your strongest. And that's definitely what I'm walking into this partnership this week.

11:04I'm super, super excited about it. I'm super excited to make an announcement very soon and share it all with you. And then there's a second one that's coming now too. So it's just, it's pretty incredible. One of which I worked on for years, one of which I worked on for 30 days. So it just goes to show things can change incredibly fast. But I truly believe, yeah, keep putting that hard work and keep tapping your network and helping the next person. Keep doing good. Keep, you know, helping others and creating and working hard. But also be mindful about the vibe you're putting out there and have fun and be around great people that lift up your spirits.

11:39Because the better mood and energy that you're in, the better frequency you're on, the more opportunity is going to come to you. It was just such a strong reminder for me this week. And I wanted to share that with you. Okay. I read a really cool article that I wanted to share with you. It was interesting to me. It caught my attention so much so that I emailed it to myself and I never do that. So you know that it definitely hit me. And the reason why it hit me is, okay, here was the headline. 42 year old sold his startup for 1.3 billion. in. And it all started with a rash decision to buy a camera that he couldn't afford.

12:18And it changed the trajectory of his career and his life. Here's why I love this story. I think what everybody forgets, and this is, I remember this, gosh, I remember it so clearly is that when I got fired, I couldn't compete in the industry I had expertise in, right? That I had been in for 20 years. I had to start over somewhere as a beginner. And I went through my 401k. I went through all my savings, I doubled down on me. And it was a huge risk. I didn't know what products I was going to sell. I didn't know what services I was going to sell. I didn't know I was going to have a podcast. I didn't know I was going to write two books.

12:50I didn't know I was going to start a speaking career. I didn't know I was going to land a board seat. I didn't know I was going to have consulted. I didn't know any of this stuff, none of it. And I just want you to remember that, that there's always going to be an amount of risk if you want to have some type of reward. And oftentimes you're going to have to double down on you. You're going to have to invest in you. And much like this 42 year old that just sold his startup for a billion dollars. He started by buying a$17 ,000 camera he couldn't afford, right? He went all in. So I'm going to read you a little bit of, this is from an article on CNBC has a program called make it.

13:22I love reading stuff like this because it inspires me to go for more, inspires me to take more risks like I'm doing this week, right? I'm going out to meet this new team. I hadn't even met them yet. And I just signed on as a partner with them. Life is full about opportunity, but you've got to be the one willing to jump and take the risk. You're not going to know. It's like not guaranteed if it's paying off. We don't know that yet, right? Either one of these partnerships that I'm entering into right now, one of them might be the biggest thing in the world. One could be a fail. Both could be amazing.

13:48We don't know until you jump and do it. And that's where the risk comes in. And to me, the right bet is to always bet on you. And if your intuition is telling you to do it, if you believe that there's something there, go all in. I'm so glad I did. That was seven years ago that I went all in on me. I was scared to death. And believe me, it took a while to get my feet underneath me. It has not been easy at all. But as all these things are happening right now, none of this would have happened if I didn't take that risk seven years ago. So if you didn't do it seven years ago, if you didn't bet on yourself, if you didn't invest in yourself, then now is the time.

14:24Okay. Let me read a little of the story of CNBC Make It. Emery Wells put himself on a path to a dream career by recklessly buying a$17 ,000 camera he couldn't afford. 42, the CEO of Frame.io, a video collab software business he co-founded in 2014 and sold to Adobe for$1.275 billion in 2021. Nearly two decades ago, he was a 25-year-old freelance video editor who'd recently quit bartending in New York to pursue a full-time film career. At an industry trade show in 06, he watched a startup building a high-end digital camera, and it was like a big budget for productions, et cetera. Without hesitating, a colleague put down a$1 ,000 deposit to get one.

15:04He was shocked that he saw his colleague do that and felt jealous and said, well, I'm going to do it too. And that deposit nearly maxed out his credit card. I mean, the guy did not have any money, obviously. He'd been bartending in New York and he was already in debt and said he had a couple hundred dollars in his bank account at the time. So he went all in when he didn't have the money. it's just incredible to hear that action like pulling the trigger making the investment is always a thing that's going to make you start moving in the right direction like it's you're speaking into existence i'm doing this even though i don't know how i'm going to do it i don't know the path to get there i don't know what it's going to look like i'm sure that day he did not think he was going to end up a billionaire because of this but it completely altered his career in his life suddenly he was in high demand by 2014 his post-production company brought in more than a million dollars annually from clients like Coca-Cola and Pfizer.

15:51This all happened and stem from him buying that camera, right? He built a company around it, but the real money it turns out was in a piece of software built by Wells and another engineer, John Traver, a platform for people to collaborate and give feedback on videos through post-production process. So what they started with was a production company wasn't the end result and that's not how they made the billion dollars, but it led them on a path to develop the product and services that got them there. Again, that's another really important point. And I'll take you back to that on my own business, right?

16:20When I started working for myself, I had no idea what I was going to do. So I decided to write a book when Elvis Duran told me I was writing a book. So I Googled, how do you write a book? I figured out how to write a book. I wrote a book. Then I Googled, how do you sell books? I started speaking. That led to my speaking career, right? That wouldn't have happened if I hadn't written the book first. Then when I was out speaking and I was trying to figure out how else to sell books, I found out you go on podcasts. And that led to me being a guest on podcasts. And then I was like, why don't I just start my own podcast?

16:44Wait a minute, what's going on here? Right. So every one of these things, you don't know necessarily where you're going. You don't have to have it all mapped out. You just need to keep getting up and moving forward the way we'll be shown, right? Just keep taking that next step. You don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take that next step. Martin Luther King, amazing quote. Okay. So then his startup raised more than$80 million over the next five years. You know, then Adobe made an offer to that he couldn't refuse, you know, not that much later. I mean, this whole thing happened just over a few years' time.

17:13So he discusses the risk of giving up a sure thing to take a chance on a bigger opportunity and the reckless purchase that made it all possible. And that's what the whole article is about. It really reminds me that you don't have to know the whole way. You don't have to have all the answers. You don't have to have it all figured out. In fact, nobody does, but you do have to go all in on you. You do have to invest in you. Meet a different guest each week.

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19:31confidence. You're probably going to have to take a leap of faith and spend some money on you, right? And I definitely have done that. I continue to do that. It continues to be scary at times, right? It certainly was petrifying at first. And so many people will tell you that you're wrong. So many people, but we know what's funny. So many people were telling me I was wrong when I started off and telling me to go back to corporate America and, you know, be a chief revenue officer of another company in a different industry or whatever, you know, just stay in the lane that I was already had some success in.

19:59For whatever reason, I didn't do it because my intuition was telling me not to. And the more I would stay that path, the more doors would open and amazing things would happen. And I just feel like those are signs that you're on that right path. And now I know I was in church today with my son and they were talking about asking God to help you find your purpose in your path. I know I'm on mine and that's wild because seven years ago I didn't, I had no idea, right? I was clueless. And it's just, it's so interesting that just the act of investing in yourself, moving forward, believing that there is something there and testing and trying, right?

20:30Like the data is not going to lie to you and everything I've done has not been successful. I've talked to you about this before too, right? I worked on a clothing line with Perry Ellis for almost a year and it failed. I worked on my soul sayings line and that has not taken off yet. It will someday. I freaking love it. It's so incredible. And that's just, you know, two examples, but there are so many clothing line pitches and decks I've gone through and, you know, creator meetings and that haven't worked out, right? So many brand partnerships that failed and fell apart. This partnership that I've been working on for the last few years, it's finally coming to fruition now, but it took years to get there.

21:03And you never know along the way, have I just been wasting my time with this or is it actually happening? It's all about trusting, trust the process, trust that, believe in yourself that if this isn't the right one, another better door is going to open and that's going to be the one that's actually meant for you and have faith as you move forward that you are on your right path. And if you don't know what that right path or purpose is yet, oh my gosh, start taking a look at what are the things that people ask you for? What is everyone always coming and asking about? What are things that you loved doing when you were younger?

21:29Like, where do you find joy? Because the more you can marry doing something that you love doing, doing it with people that you love, that you have fun with, that you believe in that believe in you, the more successful you're going to be. Get away from the negative people that are not lifting up, challenging you to grow and stretching you to that next goal or passion or accomplishment that's important to you and start spending time with people that actually want you to win. To me, that was my biggest holdback for years, years, and years. And I just think about how much potential I was leaving on the table.

22:02I love that saying that there's so much unrealized potential in the cemetery. Don't let that be you. Go after it now, today, while you're still alive and have that chance. Leave that legacy for others to learn, to grow from, and to benefit from. Encourage other people. Be a light in a world that too often is full of darkness, right? And that's on you, and that's on you and the attitude you bring forth today. And it doesn't matter what your job is. There was a guy at Valet the other day, and he just brought me so much joy when I went downstairs and was so nice to me about just telling me how much he loves my energy and likes talking to me every morning.