Confidence Classic: How to Create More Balance Without Losing Your Drive with Heather!

0:00Heather Monahan:Write your own money story with Monarch. Use code CONFIDENCE at Monarch.com to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just$50. That's 50 % off your first year at Monarch.com with code CONFIDENCE. If meetings are eating up your day, Granola is a no-brainer. You can try it totally free. Just head to granola.ai slash confidence. That's granola.ai slash confidence to get your time back. Try it for free at granola.ai slash confidence. For the first time ever, you can try NetSuite Next for free. If your revenue is at least in the seven figures, go to netsuite.ai slash Monaghan. Built for every industry, ready for every boardroom.

0:46Heather Monahan:netsuite.ai slash Monahan. For a limited time, my listeners get a free month of Primal Queen plus four free gifts at primalqueen.com slash confidence. That's primalqueen.com slash confidence. When you check out, tell them Creating Confidence sent you. You never know what seeds you're planting today and what those can grow into. We can't just dictate that all my revenue will come from these two sources. It can come from anywhere. And I can't be forcing things. I can just keep showing up as my best self and being open to receiving where these things come from. You never know where that next opportunity will come from.

1:29Those seeds that you planted years and years ago, maybe now is a time that they're coming to fruition. They're coming to abundance and they're going to bring opportunity into your life just when you least expect it.

1:42Heather Monahan:Come on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity, and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up. Tell me, have you been enjoying these new bonus confidence classics episodes we've been dropping on you every week? We've literally hundreds of episodes for you to listen to. So these bonuses are a great way to help you find the ones you may have already missed. I hope you love this one as much as I do. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me today. So gosh, a lot happening in the world. I don't know if you are feeling this heaviness with, I can't even believe I'm saying this.

2:24It's 2022 and we're talking about war. It seems so insane to me. I can't even fathom that technology is so advanced. People are just so much more open. And I thought evolved. I thought that I don't even know what I thought. I just I can't believe there's a war happening right now. And these poor people in Ukraine are separated from their families and losing lives and homes being blown up. It's horrific. And I just I'm at a loss of words. I don't even know what to say. I I can't believe that this situation is happening in our world, in our life. And it's so crazy. We just lived through a global pandemic and the whole world is just trying to get back on their feet and move things forward and create some sense of normalcy.

3:16And now Putin starts a war. I have no words. I'm so sad for everyone in our world. I just am so sad for everyone. This is just horrible. And I'm praying that the right people are able to get this shut down and shut Russia down. This is just, I just have no words. I'm just praying for everybody. And I hope you are to totally believe in the power of prayer. And there's so much information and data and science behind the power of prayer and the impact it can have. So don't think that your prayers aren't noticed or don't have an impact. They do. And hopefully you can say a prayer for everyone and peace in our world and safety for people.

4:03Freedom is something I just always have taken for granted. And really the last couple of days have just made me think so much about, you know, the pandemic taught me that anything can happen at any point in time. We have no control, never did, never will. and then this is just a further reminder of that that you know you can be doing the best job that you can in your life and controlling the things you can control and something so insane can happen and it's just I have no words okay so definitely prayers for Ukraine prayers for everyone and prayers for peace for sure so this is an interesting week for me my son was on vacation for the week and, you know, we didn't really have any plans.

4:46And I'm really big into, you know, I'm definitely not perfect. I make a lot of mistakes. And one of the things that I've probably done wrong or could have done better or am trying to work on now is sometimes I just work too much, right? Because I always believe in revenue fixes all problems and accelerating revenue and leaning into work. And I typically really like what I do. So, right, so it's not like I don't want to do it. And sometimes I get obsessed with it, right? like a maniac, especially after getting fired and not knowing what I was going to do and not knowing, you know, not having that track record or forecast or pipeline.

5:21It was really nerve wracking for me. You know, it still is because I am just a rookie entrepreneur trying to figure out, you know, what the right things are to work on, who the right people are to partner with. You know, should I have partners? Should I have more products? Should I lean in more to my speaking? Should I write another book? Should I do more podcasts? Ah, I'm sure you feel like this sometimes too. It's hard to know where are the right places to invest your time when your time is your most valuable thing. Well, I've been reading more and more about this idea that working all the time is not good and it's actually hindering you.

5:53And so anyhow, I made a decision that I would work Monday and Friday and that I would not work Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday this week and just spend time with my son doing fun things. And I asked God, I was like, God, I don't know what we're going to do, but please just deliver me a miracle. I don't know what it's going to be. And it's so crazy because a number of things happened, some good, some not so good. But you know, we actually had a super fun week. I don't know, like people say, when you go off and enjoy life, you'll see abundance will come to you. I don't know if that's happening, right?

6:25I haven't seen it yet. I'll keep you updated if I do. But we did definitely have a fun time. And the older I get, the more I realized life, like the meaning of life, what you're really supposed to do, Like what life is all about is about joy. Life is about spending moments with people that you love and creating experiences. And life is about reaching and striving for your potential to do good in the world and like finding your purpose and impacting the planet and the earth and the world with whatever special gifts you've been given. And I feel really grateful at 47. I know what my purpose and my mission is.

6:59That's crystal clear to me. Like I am so clear and I have to be thankful for getting fired for finding that. and stepping into the work that I do now. But you know, it's just, sometimes I struggle with that idea that it's about really just, you know, relaxing into finding joy and these moments, because this underlying regular me or 1.0 version of me wants to always be working super hard to create revenue. So I toggle back and forth with right, like, what is the right thing to do? Anyhow, so Monday and Friday, I worked and then Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday took off, And it ended up being great.

7:34One of a dear friend of mine from home from Massachusetts came down unexpectedly with her son, who's the same age as my son. And we got to hang out with them and had the greatest time. I hadn't seen her since 2019. It was so fun. And we just had just it was just a great time. Totally unexpected, out of nowhere and just serendipitous how it all worked out. My other good friend from home came down with his daughter, who's the same age as my son. And he got a yacht for a day. And he had his mother there and another good friend who I hadn't seen in years. And this was crazy. It just all came out of left field.

8:06And so we had such a great time that day. It was what an amazing experience to be out on the water. I live in Miami, but, you know, most of the time I'm inside thanks to Virtual World. And it was just such a great reminder of, you know, how beautiful everything is and the gratitude I have to live where I live and be able to do fun, amazing things like this. It was just it was so cool. Well, my son had such a great time. And then we went away to one of our favorite hotels for one night just to give ourselves like that vacation vibe. And it was a lot of fun. I'll keep you updated on if it pays off.

8:41If what some people tell me, my good friend Gina, who I had on the show, you know, gave me a long lecture on the show, on the podcast about the need to really relax into things and enjoy and watch when you do that. that's when your best ideas will come and that's when abundance will come to you. So I will keep you updated on that. And to that end, I have another girlfriend, another good friend of mine who lives here, who's really been on this journey about she's trying to find out what her purpose is in life and, you know, what her special work is she's supposed to be doing and what does that look like?

9:15And I don't know if you're struggling with that right now, but I do know a lot of people are. I know I did for years, but I was never going to figure it out if I didn't leave the bad situation I was in. That I'm clear on, right? So if you are in a bad situation, it's kind of hard to start seeing what that right opportunity is because you're so dragged down in the negativity and your energy and your creativity is pulled out of you. And you're kind of just trying to survive. So it's hard to thrive. It's hard to foresee and create that vision when you're in that negativity. This is why I wrote Overcoming Your Villains, right?

9:51It's all about how to get away from that negativity enough so that you can get that space for yourself to say, okay, what is my life's work? What is my passion? Like, what am I, who are the people I'm supposed to be rolling with here? Because I'm not with the right ones right now in this situation or in this instance. And how can I reshape this? And how can I reimagine it? Like, what can this look like? And so again, I go back to getting fired was that big redirection for me and that blessing to find my life's work, my mission, my passion. And so as I mentioned, I have a really good friend who's kind of going through that same phase in her life right now, which I think so many of us do.

10:29And she's been big into she wants to try new and different things, which is super smart, right? If you're not getting the answer to whatever big question you have, doing the same things and asking the same people and going through the same processes, it's time to try different things. Makes all the sense in the world. And I remember when I was looking for my purpose and passion, my mentor said to me, you need to do something that you're completely uncomfortable with, that you don't want to do, that you're resisting doing. Because when you find that thing, that will help you unlock, you know, what it is you're looking for.

11:01And so it ended up being, you know, he posed the question to me, which is great. And if this is something you want to work on, pose a question to yourself, what is something that makes you really uncomfortable or that you really don't want to do and force yourself to do it, you know, and a lot of times that's just holding yourself accountable. I tapped a friend. My thing was I didn't want to do this standup comedy class. I thought it was ridiculous. And why would I do that? What a waste of my time and blah, blah. I was coming with every reason why I shouldn't do it. And so finally, a friend called me out and said, gosh, you're really against this.

11:32What's wrong with you? And I thought, oh, my gosh, this is I'm resisting it. OK, I have to do it. So I grabbed a girlfriend. I said, let's go. We're going to go do this together. And we did. But what was so interesting is, and this is years ago now, probably a decade ago, I one night when we got there, they said, OK, everyone, you know, you're going to take turns, get up on stage. You have to speak for seven minutes and you talk about anything and then we're going to give you feedback. And so when I got up, I was, you know, going on and on. Who knows what I was talking about? I don't even remember.

12:01But I always knew that I could just talk, you know, I had been doing this in sales and sales leadership my whole life. You know, you just get up and you have to speak in front of audiences of people. And so I had become not only confident at it, but very confident in myself when I was speaking. And so it was so funny because when I got off, they were like, oh my gosh, that was amazing. You're a natural blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I thought, oh, I am. And it's one of those things that you just assume, and we all do this, whatever you're really great at, whatever's so special and unique about you, you probably assume everybody has that same power or it's not that big of a deal.

12:39I definitely did. I never thought twice about it because to me, I thought it's just like part of my job, whatever. Who cares if I can speak? It didn't seem to bring any value to me that I could first. I just, again, I was back in a negative situation. I wasn't seeing things clearly. Well, that night, I'll never forget when I left there that night, remembering to myself, okay, they just pointed this out. This is special, unique, and different. Other people don't have this talent. This is something I was given from God, a gift. This is something I need to lean into and figure out. Now, it took years for me to figure out that I was going to get into the speaking business, that I was going to launch a podcast, that I was going to start writing books.

13:18I didn't know those things. But just posing the question was step one. And then two, stepping into really uncomfortable, fearful situations that I was resisting. That was the next step. And then observing and acknowledging and receiving that positive feedback, right? Instead of brushing it off like, oh, no, no big deal. I said, oh, my gosh, thank you for saying that and opening my eyes to this gift that I've been given. and then I would occasionally think about it, right? It wasn't like this overnight change. I didn't figure it all out overnight, but I just started thinking, gosh, the speaking thing, I've got to try to find ways for me to speak more and in different venues and arenas.

13:57And that's when I got really into charity work and I was on the board of a charity here in Miami and they started having me headline different events and I started speaking all, but again, I put it out there, right? Like it's all, this is process. It doesn't just happen overnight and that all that process, you know, from a decade ago led to when I got fired, writing the book confidence creator, and then Googling, how do you sell books? And it said, speak. And I thought, oh, I'm great at that. No problem. But again, I didn't know it was a business, right? I didn't know. I didn't have all these answers.

14:28It was just like one stepping in the dark, leading to the next step in the dark, leading to the next to who knows. And that's, to me, what's exciting about today, tomorrow and beyond is that as long as we keep getting up and just moving forward, making messy action and taking steps, not knowing what's to come, we have no idea what's ahead of us. And that is so flipping exciting, right? So it's finding that certainty in the uncertainty, which is exciting, right? Oh my gosh, I can't wait to get up tomorrow. I have no idea what's about to happen, which is the complete opposite of how I felt back in corporate America.

15:03I thought everything, I was in this well-lit arena and I know, absolutely know the next thing that's gonna happen and this is guaranteed and this is guaranteed. And I never felt that excitement of that possibility like I do now. But of course there's moments where it's scary, right? Like this unknown is still scary and I toggle back and forth with that. But I try to lean into, there's a fine line between fear and excitement. I'm leaning towards excitement. I hope you are leaning with me. I highly suggest it. Meet a different guest each week. I've sat in CEO chair.

15:40Heather Monahan:I've been on boards. I've led five acquisitions. And here's what I know. Every day your business is late to AI, you fall two days behind. Fortunately, there's NetSuite next. You probably know NetSuite, the AI-powered suite connecting your financials, inventory, commerce, HR, and CRM into one source of truth, trusted by 44 ,000 customers. NetSuite Next is the next huge leap AI built into everything you do. It surfaces custom insights all day. And anytime you have a question, you just ask, like talking to a colleague. It's built for your industry, whether you're doing millions or hundreds of millions.

16:16Heather Monahan:It's time for NetSuite Next, where your business meets AI. If I had needed this, it's what I'd use. For the first time ever, you can try NetSuite Next for free. If your revenue is at least in the seven figures, go to netsuite.ai slash Monaghan. Built for every industry, ready for every boardroom. netsuite.ai slash Monaghan. Can I be honest with you? For way too long, I thought feeling off was just part of being a woman. That 3 p.m. crash, the brain fog, mood swings that no one can explain. I got so sick of accepting it, and that's what sent me down a rabbit hole that landed me on Primal Queen.

16:53Heather Monahan:Beef organs were not where I expected to end up. Primal Queen built a formula specifically for women. Not just organ nutrition, but female organs too, like your uterus and ovaries packed into two capsules a day. No taste and no prep. Just that real shift back to who you are. High energy, locked in focus and a great mood. It's grass fed, pasteurized, no hormones, no antibiotics, third party tested. And over 25 ,000 women have given it a 4.6 star rating. For a limited time, my listeners get a free month of Primal Queen plus four free gifts at primalqueen.com slash confidence. That's primalqueen.com slash confidence.

17:38Heather Monahan:When you check out, tell them Creating Confidence sent you.

17:47Okay, so I was working this week with one of my one-on-one coaching clients. It was interesting. She's sitting there with me. She has all the answers. She's so smart. She's such a talented person. But when I'm working with her, I see she just doubts herself and second guesses herself so much. Here's what I want everyone to know. I've been there. I've done that. Everybody's been there and done that. But the key, the answer is to push through with messy action. You don't have to have a business plan built out. You don't have to spend thousands of dollars on something like to tell you what to do.

18:22You know, you have to take messy action and just keep pushing yourself through those times where you do feel full of doubt. I certainly felt full of doubt for a long time, you know, after getting fired and moving into that unknown and the pandemic and all of this. And it's so crazy because I was just reminded, plant a seed. There's no way for you to know how soon it's going to materialize. We hope it will and we hope someday it will, but we don't know exactly when. And an example of that is back in 2019, I was in Boston speaking for the Drift Marketing Sales and Marketing Conference. I was interviewing Sarah Blakely and her husband, Jesse Itzler, live on stage.

19:04And I remember saying to myself, this is an opportunity for me to check in with the speaker bureau that happens to be headquartered in Boston. It was going to be a pain, right? I wasn't going to be able to spend the day with my friends or do the things that maybe I would have wanted to do. But I thought it's probably a good idea to do it. So I spent the day going over, meeting their entire team, sitting one on one with all the key players. And I got up and did a speech for them while I was there so that they would, you know, gain some insight into who I am. And just thought that would help make me more real to them and create that personal connection, trust.

19:40And so they would want to start pitching me. Well, of course, then the pandemic hit and everything kind of went dark for a while. but wouldn't you know out of the blue this week I got an email from one of the speaker agents who I met who saw me speak when I came to their offices and he said Heather I haven't heard from you in a while hope you're well listen I've got a client I just think you're going to be the right fit and so I'm pitching you I'm going on anyways he ended up securing the deal and getting the deal done and it was one of those moments I thought you know we do plant these seeds we don't know if they're ever going to pay off or not.

20:16Gosh knows, you know, I have my partnership with Perielis International. I spent so much time on and that fell apart. I had a skincare line I was working on for a year and that fell apart. Right. I have a lot of things I've worked on that haven't materialized yet. Right. I mean, they may in the future. I don't know if they will, but I do know the key is to keep stepping into what seems right at the right time, doing that next right thing and planting those seeds in various places. And I recently had Chris Harder on the podcast. He does a lot of work with people around the way they think in regards to money.

20:51And I just signed up for his text program, which when I do the episode with him, you'll hear about and you can sign up for it too. It's amazing. And so I've been getting these daily texts from him talking about our relationship with money. And one day last week, he sent a text that said something like this, don't think you know where money has to come from. Money can come from seeds planted years ago, ideas you had years ago, friendships you had years ago, you know, acquaintances you made years ago. It doesn't have to come from the one thing you think it's coming from. Money can come from anything, anywhere, anytime.

21:30That's the beauty of abundance. And I really sat with that for a while and started thinking, you know, it doesn't matter that I wrote Confidence Creator in 2018. That book could go viral tomorrow and make me million, right? Like who's to say that it can't? No one is to say that. You never know where that next opportunity will come from. We can't just dictate that all my revenue will come from these two sources and here. That's how I've always thought. I always thought it had to be that way. But that text he sent really opened my eyes to anything's possible. It can come from anywhere and I can't be forcing things.

22:08I can just keep showing up as my best self and being open to receiving where these things come from, you know, with a positive attitude. So it was kind of crazy and it made me realize even my board seat, right, that would have never happened had the pandemic not hit. And here I was saying I can't stand the pandemic and I had to do, you know, these group coachings and I didn't know what I was doing. But that's how I met my friend that ended up nominating me to the board of directors of HealthLink. So I wouldn't have landed that position if it hadn't been for this whole crazy situation. So you never know what seeds you're planting today and what those can grow into and the abundance and opportunity it can bring into your life.

22:50That's what's so exciting about today and tomorrow is, you know, stepping into that possibility of who knows what we're creating right now. And who knows when we started creating it? It could have been years ago and we just had no idea. So plant those seeds. Stop at the marketing agency when you're in the city and make a pitch and shake their hands and speak to them. Because you never know a couple of years later, they might have a chance to pitch you and they're going to say, oh, I met her. I know she is. No, I can vouch for her. She's she's great. You know, I just I thought that once the pandemic hit, all that stuff just went away and it didn't.

23:27So those seeds that you planted years and years ago, maybe now is a time that they're coming to fruition. They're coming to abundance and they're going to bring opportunity into your life just when you least expect it. That's my new angle on money and abundance and what is possible. So I hope that you consider that for you. Meet a different guest each week.