Confidence Classic: Negotiate Like a PRO, Build POWERFUL Relationships, & Close BIG Deals with Molly Fletcher

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1:15I mean, it's not a bad thing to tell yourself, but you've got to do things and take action to strengthen that confidence muscle. Come on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals. overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close up. Tell me, have you been enjoying these new bonus confidence classics episodes we've been dropping on you every week? We've literally hundreds of episodes for you to listen to. So these bonuses are a great way to help you find the ones you may have already missed. I hope you love this one as much as I do.

1:50Hi and welcome back. I'm so excited for you to meet my guest today. Molly Fletcher is a trailblazer in every sense of the word. In her message to audiences around the world, she shares the unconventional techniques she used to thrive in her former career as a top sports agent and now as a successful entrepreneur, speaker, and author. She's hailed as the female Jerry Maguire. Molly negotiated over 500 million in contracts and represented hundreds of the biggest sports stars. She's been featured in ESPN, Fast Company, Forbes, and Sports Illustrated. She's the author of five books, most recently, The Energy Clock.

2:27And today we're lucky enough to have Molly here with us. Thank you, Molly. Absolutely. It's great to be with you. Oh my gosh. So I've got to tell you, my ex-fiance was a sports agent and I was with him for eight years. And I'm very, very familiar with that business. I've never in my life met a female in that business. How in the world did you get into that? And how were you so successful? Well, you have a good sense of what a 24-7 deal that is, obviously. You know, I was a student athlete at Michigan State, and I always wanted to stay in the business of sports. I grew up in Michigan and then moved to Atlanta to get into the sports business.

3:06And through some navigating and, you know, odds and end jobs out of college, I got an opportunity with an agency and really came in to go get endorsement and appearance deals for the athletes and coaches that we had. We had a few athletes and coaches. And after I had sort of gotten through the Olympics in Atlanta and I looked at the owner of the business and I said, wait, you know, we need to get more talent under management, right? Not just the four or five that we had. And certainly baseball's big in Atlanta. There was, you know, the Georgia Tech, Georgia, minor league teams, pro teams. So I said, man, you know, what if we got more aggressive and went after more clients?

3:43And, of course, he was probably, to your point, looking at me going, well, how's that going to work, right? Like you didn't play in the big leagues, certainly. And I said, look, let me put a plan together and let's start with baseball. I mean, you know, it's right here. We have one guy. Let's start there. And he said, we'll put a business plan together. So I did. I put a business plan together. He blessed it. And I was off to the races. And, you know, fast forward 18 years later, signed about 300 athletes, coaches, broadcasters, golfers, you know, tour players, primarily big league baseball guys, all that.

4:15So it's incredible the level of success that you found in such a heavily dominated male business where, like, as you mentioned, you didn't have the same background that a lot of these people had. You were really, you know, one of I would imagine just only a couple of women in this entire industry. How were you able to overcome that hurdle when you were trying to connect with players when you would initially meet with them? Yeah, you know, to me, it was an opportunity to reframe the moments. Right. Because it could get easy when I was the only woman. I was the only one at the time when I kind of got into it that I was aware of that was sort of wanting to not just do marketing deals for the athletes, but to negotiate their primary contracts.

4:54And so, you know, there's a lot of moments where I was the only woman on the fence at a baseball game or the only woman behind the, you know, dugout at batting practice at a big league park. And, you know, some guys would look at me or managers and say, what is this chick doing here, guys? Quit talking to her. And I could have said, maybe I don't belong here, right? Like maybe this isn't going to work. I mean, these guys think I'm somebody's wife. The managers think I'm hitting on them. But it was an opportunity to go, what a gift. I'm different. I'm different. I can connect and solve and serve these guys differently than the men that I was competing with.

5:31Because a lot of these guys, if they were married or dating, their wife didn't have any support. You know, a big league guy, you know, gets traded and they're, you know, they got on an airplane and they're in the dugout of the new team in no time. And, you know, the wife is standing there with cars and kids and houses going, what do I what do I do? Like, what does this look like? It's April. So, you know, there was so many moments like that. And I think we all have a choice consistently to reframe those moments and to recognize the gifts in them while staying absolutely true to who we are. You know, I never tried to show up in khakis and a golf shirt like the scouts or the agents I was competing with.

6:14I wanted to be who I authentically was. And I think that's what the world wants from all of us. That's how we connect. That's how we build relationships is by showing up as who we are in life is how connection happens. And so, you know, mindset reframing, all those things are integral to the ability to to step into a place that I certainly was the only woman often in the room. Were there ever moments early on in your career where you had those imposter syndrome moments? Oh, my gosh. Do I really belong here? Did you ever question or have that conversation with yourself? You know, I feel really blessed, Heather, because I grew up with incredible parents who always wanted me to sort of be myself, to lean into what was possible, who always challenged me to go for it and never laid a doubt in my mind that I couldn't.

7:04They raised me in a way to know that hard is okay, that hard is doable. And just because it's hard doesn't mean you should walk away. In fact, you probably should really step into it. with two older brothers who treated me a whole lot more like a little brother than a little sister. So I had imposter syndrome at 10 when I was jumping into the wrestling pile with my 15-year-old brothers getting my head beat in, right? But as I evolved and grew, I found that the more that I stepped into discomfort, the stronger I got and the more confident I got. I believe confidence is built through action. It's a muscle that we strengthen by taking action, right?

7:45We can't, you and I, and anybody listening, you can't sit at your desk and go, I'm going to be more confident. I mean, it's not a bad thing to tell yourself, but you've got to do things and take action to strengthen that confidence muscle. Oh, I couldn't agree more. And I love how you framed it just like a muscle, but it's something you need to work on intentionally every day. And like you said, through action steps and stepping into that discomfort. You are so my people. All right, so you wrote a book about negotiation and you literally negotiated over$500 million in contracts. Download us with some of your best negotiation tips and techniques, please.

8:19Yeah, for sure. And I would encourage, you know, negotiation, it's a little bit like confidence, right? You get better when you practice. So I always encourage people, you know, practice a ton. Find yourself in lots of different moments, big and small and practice. I certainly didn't start negotiating$100 million contracts. I often started doing$5 ,000 deals or trade-outs or appearances or endorsements, deals that were$50 ,000 to$100 ,000. So I think one of the biggest mistakes people can make is they spend so much time thinking about what they want. What are the terms that I want? What's the length of time?

8:54What are the things that matter to me? And I think in negotiation, the best is spending time and energy on what do they want? What matters most to them? What are the things that are going to drive yeses, if you will, from them? So anytime I was negotiating a baseball player's contract, for example, or a coach or a broadcaster, I'd spend a lot of time in the head and the heart of the person that I was negotiating with. What are they worried about? What does the free agent market look like for them? Who do they have in minor leagues? What other coaches are available, right? What other networks? I mean, all those things are incredibly important to spend time and energy and prepare for because the more that we prepare and understand what the person that we're negotiating with is worried about, the more that we can hopefully drive connection.

9:43And at the end of the day, negotiation is really just a conversation, right? It's a difficult one, but it's a conversation. And the more that we can keep that conversation going at some level through understanding what matters most to them, I think the better the outcome. But also the more preparation we have in that regard, the more comfortable we are with all the zigging and zagging that occurs in any negotiation, which is a ton, right? And we're more confident in those moments when we're prepared. But I think so, you know, getting in the head and the heart of the people that we're negotiating with is key.

10:16You know, the other thing I think is incredibly important is having the courage to pause, right? So, yes, negotiation is a conversation, but it doesn't mean that it can't pause from time to time. Because when we pause, pause can be two minutes, five, two days, a week, a month. But when we pause, we send messages. We send messages probably that what we have positioned is where we are, that we're firm at some level. It's incredibly powerful. I think if you are prepared and you lay a strong relational foundation inside of a negotiation, you communicate and connect with what you want, the more comfortable you can be pausing, which sends powerful messages.

11:00And I think that's a mistake a lot of people make. A lot of times when we're negotiating, we do all kinds of things right. And then we ask for what we want. And then we keep talking. And the best thing you can do is just pause. It's like when you go work out, you're doing abs with the medicine ball with your trainer or a workout partner, throw that ball over there. Let them hold it. Let them feel it, that you mean it. That's an incredibly powerful thing. So those were a couple tips. I would say maybe a third one would be, you know, turn defensiveness inside of difficult conversations into curiosity.

11:37Go from that when you want to come out of your chair, come through the screen, go at whatever that feeling might be that bubbles up inside of you, inside of a negotiation. Get curious, Ask more great questions to get insight and intel and information so that you can then, Bob, and we even continue to find a way to solve and at the end of the day, close a gap for them. Meet a different guest each week. Confidence creator. When you want more, start your business with Northwest Registered Agent and get access to thousands of free guides, tools, and legal forms to help you launch and protect your business.

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15:36Molly, I want to go back to the point that you made about the power of pause, because I feel like that is an art that most people don't have. I certainly have struggled with that many, many times in my career. But when you were explaining that, I was thinking to myself, why is it maybe that I'm not a master at pausing for a couple of days and standing firm, like you said, and allowing that to make the statement of, you know, how clear I am on what it is that I've asked for or what it is that I'm expecting. It's that uncertainty, that wonder, oh my gosh, am I letting this go too long? How are you able to work yourself through that?

16:11Well, you know, we teach negotiation. I have a negotiation program that we built off my book around negotiation. I think that there's a lot of data around the way that we're raised, our environment that can impact our comfort or lack of with silence. But if you follow a model that we teach, which is around setting the stage and all the things that have to happen to do that, having the courage to discover the gaps inside of the lives of the people that we're trying to connect with and serve. And when we do a lot of things in advance of our ask, and we've built that strong foundation, that relationship, we understand what matters to them.

16:47We've certainly laid a foundation and communicated our position along the way as well. Then we have to have the confidence to pause. So I think potentially somebody doesn't have the confidence to pause when maybe they feel like there's something that they haven't communicated that they need to. And if we can do all those things on the front end, then we go in for the ask, we have more comfort in pausing because we've settled. I'll tell you a story. I was negotiating a baseball player's contract who was a big league guy. He was going to arbitration if we couldn't come to terms with the team. And in arbitration, there's three perfect strangers that pick whether the number that we've submitted as his agent or the team has submitted which one it's going to be.

17:30So it could be a several million dollar gap. It's not a compromise. It's one or the other. And I always hated taking my guys to arbitration because number one, the team just beats them up and tells them how bad they are because they're trying to position the judges to the arbitrators to give them the lower number. So it's never good mentally, I think, for certain guys. Long story short, I'd set the stage. I'd built common ground with these folks. I'd asked for what I wanted. All those things that happened over several months. It was the night before we were leaving for arbitration. I'd done everything from the foundation perspective.

18:03My client and I were very aligned. I go to bed that night. I'm getting ready to jump on an 8.30 a.m. flight to Phoenix to the arbitration hearing, and my phone rings 11.30 at night. I used to sleep with my phone by my bed, as I'm sure you're candidly familiar with. So I answer it was the general manager of the team, and he said, unbelievable. He said, you're going to Arizona, aren't you? And I said, we are. And he said, wow, you're firm. I said, we are. And I just paused. and my husband after about you know a minute and a half said is he still there right like because a minute and a half on the phone without anybody saying it seems like a long time super weird and I said yes you're right and about a minute and a half goes by two minutes and he said you got a deal I'll email over the term sheet and that minute and a half would have been a lot of opportunity for me to say, here you go.

18:59Listen, why don't we just do this on the bonuses? Let's just do this. And on the base, I'd come down to here. I didn't do any of that. My client and I were aligned. I felt good about where we were. I'd said everything I'd ever needed to say. There was nothing else to say. We didn't want to come off the numbers and we got a deal. So I think that in life, we have to recognize the power and all the things that happen before we go firm, before we ask for what we want. We teach a tool in negotiation in our program. It's called an E-Walk and it's a deal preparation tool that's really powerful in helping people identify everything that's in play, which is the E.

19:37The W is what do you want? What are options? People love options when you negotiate with them. They loved it. We can do this or we could do this. We can do 5 million with 3 million in bonuses or we can do 4 million with 5 million in bonuses. People love choices. and then you've also got a preload. What are you willing to let go of? What are you asking for that though at some point in the conversation, maybe you unload, you get rid of it. You show some concession. What are you gonna preload that you could unload? So there's a model and a process certainly that I saw in negotiating thousands of deals and a half a billion in contracts that works.

20:18But those are a couple little nuggets that I hope can help people. What's the most common mistake that you see people making in negotiations? Well, I think often one is I believe that the stronger the relationships are inside of a negotiation, the better the outcomes. And in fact, sometimes the quicker the outcome. I think a lot of times people would think, boy, as an agent, man, you are just going head to head, take the gloves off, get after it. What I found worked best was strengthening that relationship, almost pouring into it, giving and driving connection. And the more connected I was, whether it was to a manufacturer's rep for a golf deal or a general manager or a network executive or an athletic director, the better the relationship, the better the outcome and often the quicker I could get them done.

21:07I think when people think that negotiation is supposed to be a battle or a war and that we want to approach it in that way, that's fine if you only want to do one deal with them. But if you want to potentially negotiate and do lots of deals, the relational piece is really important. I don't know that I would say, though, that's the most common mistake, but I think it's something that is misunderstood from time to time. and that if we can approach everything from a relational perspective versus a transactional perspective, we'll find better outcomes and we'll find relationships that we can go back to.

21:42For me, relationships were a differentiator because there's 30 big league clubs. You got guys coming out. You can't be sideways with 10 of them because you need to be able to go to those relationships or if I had an executive at ESPN or NBC, I needed to sustain that relationship because I would have other athletes, coaches, broadcasters that they were trusting me to be a steward of their career with that relationship. So relationships and connection is huge. But I would say, though, Heather, the biggest mistake is not pausing. It's so interesting hearing you talk. I've met so many sports agents.

22:22You speak so differently than, and I only know male sports agents until now, but they are talking more about more combative win and, you know, how can we bury them? And it's so interesting to your point, when you opened this up in the beginning, being female has led you down this path of relationship and trust and nurturing and pouring into, which I've Never heard an agent say, by the way. Right. And it's so cool to hear that's what your superpower is. That's where you got your strength or what made you so unique and different. And the more you've leaned into the fact that you're a woman, the more that you've leaned into that you're different than these guys over here, the more success you found.

23:02It makes perfect sense. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that we can all do that in whatever career and industry that we're in, right? Lean into who you are and use your differences as gifts, as opportunities to connect. And it doesn't mean that I didn't, I had a ton of very difficult conversations with general managers. But if you lined them up, I ran into a Hall of Fame general manager the other day, you know, and he was trying to give me half of his burger and share his French fries at a bar the other day when I was there with another client. That's just not normal. and there's a lot of mutual respect there.

23:42And I think I know that that helped me to be a steward of the clients that I served. And that was incredibly important to me. I mean, when these guys and gals are trusting you to navigate their career, that has a real finite amount of time to it generally. I mean, these guys, they make in five years, 10 years, what most of us make in 50. So the clock is ticking every day. And I took that incredibly serious, the impact that all of it would have on their life long term on their family now and later. And so the relational piece has and continues to be a big part of what I believe deeply in. Meet a different guest each week.

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25:54your passion. How did you transition from being a high profile agent to becoming a speaker and author? What did that transition and pivot look like for you? Yeah. So I wrote a couple books because I started to see a common thread between peak performers and I started to see the way they behave, recover, prepare. It was different. I started to recognize that complacency has no place in sports. I love the drive inside of all my athletes and coaches. But at the end of the day, what happened was the book was a business. One of the books was a business book, The Business of Being the Best. So companies started saying, hey, will you come and do this?