Use Your Emotions to Build Wealth and Confidence with Shamina Taylor

0:00When you have learned to use your emotions to run your life in business, you will be so much more happier and aligned and wealthier because it won't come from a place of I have to come from a place because I get to. So I always say, look up the emotional wheel online, start identifying what those emotions are, because when you're trying to attract a man into your world or money, it wants to know that it has a place to go, that it can receive you, that this is somebody that needs me, you know, that's going to come in and I'm going to provide something for them. And if women are closed off and they have this wall because they haven't healed what's underneath, they're actually repelling a lot of the money.

0:34This is not to say they can't make money, but that money's being made probably in an exhaustive state. So being able to let that emotions out are important. I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity, and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with us this week. Okay, so my guest today, Shamina Taylor, she's a former attorney turned wealth consciousness mentor, bestselling author, mother of two, and host of the top-rated podcast, The Unapologetically Rich Show, dedicated to normalizing big money for women.

1:10Shamina is a renowned wealth expert on a mission to lift income ceilings, break financial barriers, and make being wealthy the new standard for women everywhere. With a proven track record of helping over 51 women become millionaire and multi-millionaires, and thousands more reach their highest cash months. She's passionate about showing what's possible when women unapologetically claim their power and their wealth. Shamina, thank you so much for being here today. Thank you for having me on, Heather. Oh, I'm so excited. Okay, so let's get into it. I love your backstory. If you could share your story, which you were generous enough to share with me when we first met in regards to how you became the powerhouse that you are today and that it definitely did not look this way years ago?

1:52Well, it started out with me on a yoga mat, actually, back in 2013, January, I just finished a bodybuilding competition, I used to, I used to be a part of figure competition. And a friend of mine said, Hey, do you want to go to go to yoga, because she teaches yoga, they're filming her on TV, and I wanted to be on TV. So definitely that was a yes, even though I had no idea what yoga was. However, that was the most probably the most transformative day of my entire life. Looking back on it, there was a before and after. And I thought that, you know, I was kind of going through the emotions with life.

2:20But here in this moment on this yoga mat, she was asking questions that all yogis do, but are you happy? And as she was saying that she was saying, you know, put one leg one way, put the other leg the next way. And me being the competitive person that I was, I was there to win yoga that day, obviously. And, you know, do everything she said, because no pain, no gain. But as I was going through these series of moves, I realized that I was not very good at yoga one, but two, it was taking me outside of my comfort zone. So as I was moving my leg in the positions that she had said, I was grabbing onto those little cork things they give you in yoga to hold on for dear life.

2:54And she was speaking and saying, are you happy? And as she was asking this question, it dawned on me that I actually don't feel very happy anymore. I feel like I've lost who I am. And as she kept talking, this physical pain was coming over me. And this physical pain turned into emotional pain. And I just started bawling on this mat. And in the same moment, I was saying to myself, who the fuck is Shamina anymore? Like, I have no idea. I was like, who am I? I had everything they told you to check off on the list of success. I had it. The marriage, the body, the businesses, the two kids, a boy and a girl, the mansion house.

3:31I had all the wealth, everything. But yet in that moment, I felt so lost, unfulfilled. And then I couldn't unsee it. So after that moment, I left, I bawled for 40, you know, 45 minutes, not everywhere. I knew something had to change in my life because when you see, you have a moment that you can't unsee anymore. It's like, you can't walk away from it. You've been there before. And then I went, went home, spoke to my husband at the time. And I said, are you happy? He said, no. A month later, he moved out. And then three and a half years later, I went on a, over these three years, something called monk mode.

3:59I went into a deep spiritual awakening and journey to find out who I was. And I, I realized I had a lot of trauma that was unresolved from childhood. I had a lot of trauma that put me into that masculine state as a woman where I was constantly working, having a shield over my heart and just trying to achieve success upon success. And no amount of success or money ever fulfilled me at all. And so as I was going through this process, I actually threw money away. I was like, I hate money. Money's bad. And then I came to another point. I'm like, money's just energy. This is crazy. And I realized that I could shift and change my frequency around money and what I believed it to be.

4:32And then I decided to come in the online space. It was just one of those things where I heard the calling. You needed to leave law, like being a lawyer for 20 something years. Then it was like, okay, there's something else for you to do. Really hard to do that, by the way. My identity was being a lawyer. And I came into the online space and I said, okay, let's do this. And with the first, I said, I thought everybody made a million dollars when they came down in the space, by the way. And so within the first year I made a million and I realized I tapped into something really big. And now I teach other women how to lift those ceilings and also how to let down that masculine shield and allow themselves to, you know, be, do, and have what they want and live a life that's not rooted in suffering and having it to be so hard like it was for myself and many of my clients.

5:14And this is it. Oh my gosh. You just put a lot into a very tight window. Okay. So let's get into some of the color and some of the tactics that you use strategy that you used and, and really the steps that you took, because it's incredible what you've accomplished. It's incredible that you've had this real moment of growth and breakthrough and what a blessing. And so many people will turn a blind eye to those moments and you didn't, you embraced it. I love that you did that. I love the transformation you've gone through. And now that you teach others how to do it, where did you actually start from the moment that you decided, okay, am I happy?

5:48No, I'm not. I'm going to go home and ask my husband if he's happy, but now I'm going to start unraveling everything. You were a lawyer and a successful lawyer. I know so many people who are successful lawyers who are unhappy, but I don't see them make that leap. Like what were some of the things that you did that allowed you or empowered you to do it? Well, I started listening to this little voice inside of me and I had to grow my faith muscle. Like I kept seeing signs and I couldn't unsee them. I was like, okay, something's calling to me. It's just a weird, like I started seeing 1111. I was out, you know, doing what mostly newly divorced women or separated women.

6:22They go out to the bar and I was seeing 1111. I'm like, okay, there's something here. I need to, I need to listen to this. And I'm a pattern reader. And I realized that there's something speaking to me. I need to stop and see what this is. And I just started trusting the inner guidance inside of me, which I never did before. I feel a lot of women are really highly intuitive, but they dismiss it a lot. They don't listen to their inner voice that's inside of them. So one of the things I started doing is unequivocally, I started listening to that voice inside of me because it was taking me to where I needed to go.

6:48Number two, what I did was I started doing a lot of self-development. As I was going through this process, I feel like I was having this spiritual awakening, but then also this self-development process. There was this book called The Seed of the Soul by Gary Zukav. And I feel like once I read it, I was like, okay, this is what's happening to me. I feel like I'm having, my human is having this spiritual experience. And I started healing different layers of my trauma. I started learning what attachment cycles were. I started learning about, you know, why I was an ice queen or cold or closed off before I started learning about energetics.

7:18You know, I went down the, you know, rabbit hole Joe Dispenza before he got super famous. You know, it was only like 50 of us in the room at the time when I was with him. And I understood energetics. And I started meditation. I started a daily practice of meditation. For eight years, one hour, I would sit in meditation. And let me tell you, it was the hardest thing I had to do in the beginning. Because when you are a person that's moving and constantly going, which is a trauma response to be busy, it made me get into the stillness and sit in my shit and really realize, okay, what is happening?

7:45This is where like the power of an hour came from, from Eckhart Tolle. It's like, how can we be present in our lives? And I learned what presence was. And I really started looking at like, how can I create an offer or a business for this, for other women to go through this process? So I created a program called Accessing the Quantum through Emotional Self Mastery. I would call it my emotional regulation program, but also creating your reality program. And I went through all the things that were barriers and resistance to me becoming emotionally mastered because if someone's got triggers childhood trauma or they resentful or they they are not able to communicate their emotions or their emotional intelligence is high a lot of the times that gets in the way of how they function in life and in their business I say that we are the blueprint for our life and business so I was like let me see if I can remove the lens that have been on here for decades and have a very clear view and clarity on the vision of what I wanted to create so I put this program together thousands of people have gone through it.

8:45And I feel like when you take your mess and you move it into your messaging, you can make millions with it. You know, like when you, sometimes a lot of us, we don't realize how proficient we are and the struggles that we've gone through because they're so close to us. But when people started asking me like, Hey, you completely changed your identity, Shamina. And like, you're quantum leaping. Like, what did you do? I had to start sharing with them. Okay. This is what I did. This is, and I started was mentoring people all around me all the time. And I'm like, oh, I need to turn this into a business.

9:14Like people are actually wanting to pay me for my time for this. And when I realized that I could package it up and sell it as a course, instead of having to do one-on-one, I started leveraging my time, creating multiple streams of income, making money in my sleep, and then scaling my business to another level. And I feel like anybody can do it. You know, like as long as you've got something and everybody has something, I believe to share with the world, you know? So, all right. Are you still meditating an hour a day? absolutely not no no i feel like it all i i do but not like i did before i really feel like it was a time and place for me to do it if i'd started doing it again would it amplify me absolutely i feel like i've tapped into another level of consciousness now on a very easy way like for me to get into that highest trust and alignment i believe like alignment is our highest authenticity i feel like i've removed the barriers to get me into a higher level of consciousness and so now I just go into it automatically.

10:10Some people like my old self needed that help. They needed to, it's like the practice of being able to get into there every day. Do I do breath work? Yes, I do breath work because I think it's a part of grounding. I'm biohacking my body a lot. So I do red light therapy and different things to calm me. I've tried almost every healing modality that was out there, not the new stuff that the kids are doing. But you know, before I drank the ayahuasca, I wanted to remove all of the stuck energy that was inside of me that wasn't serving me, because it's going to create disease in your body and it's going to make you feel like you have to play smaller than you are.

10:44I feel like the way that a woman or anybody can become the most empowered version of themselves is to have nothing holding them back, including themselves or their past. So that's a big part of what you teach in your own journey is removing the holdbacks and removing the obstacles. Yes, 100%. Because when you do that, you're unstoppable. And you don't have that little voice that's telling you, hey, don't be so loud. You know, don't want so much. you know, you're greedy or telling you the opposite of when you have a desire in your heart, it's there for a reason, whether anybody else agrees with it or not, it's there for you.

11:17And a lot of the women I work with are so goal driven, but once they get that goal, they're like, okay, what's next? What's next? What's next? But they don't have the opportunity to sit into the, wow, look what I've already achieved and celebrate themselves and be like, you know, I actually want something bigger than this. They play smaller because they're so afraid of disappointment and they don't know how to really manage their emotions. And one of the things that I teach about is tapping into that feminine energy and frequency inside of you. And a lot of women do not know how to do this. I mean, men, millions and money are like the masculine energy are all the same.

11:48It's like, you want to attract the most divine man, you want to attract millions and be supported by the masculine. The number one thing women have to do is learn how to, one, feel safe on their own, but also to really tap into their emotions and know how to feel safe and their emotional state. And a lot of women that I work with that just wasn't taught to us and it wasn't just something brought upon us. We were raised to be, how fast can you run? Big girls don't cry. Put us into a very do, do, do energy. And the real secret of this is, who are you being? Because what you be is what you attract.

12:25And it builds confidence. It builds the conviction in what you're doing. So I teach them how to tap into their emotions in a safe way. and when you do that that's like the feminine i feel is like the quantum feel i feel like it's the all-knowing it's all the abundance it's the wealth it's the ease it's flow it's not hard it's not suffering it's it's all the things that you want you get to bring in and a lot of people will say well that's a bunch of bs but let me tell you any person that's achieved a level of wealth kept it been able to compound it grow it invest it they have a knowingness inside of them that everything will always be okay.

12:59And that knowingness doesn't come from what you do. It comes from what you be. And it's a different state that you're in.

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16:43So how can someone access that? Because I'm sure there's people listening right now and they're saying that sounds great in theory, but I don't even know where to begin. Well, receiving is one of the easiest things to start doing. Now, if you are a proud, hyper-independent woman, asking for help is probably the last thing on your list and receiving support. I know when I see women that come to work with me, they might be making a lot of money and money does not change who you are and where you are, but being able to enjoy your money and work as many hours to make it. So you're, you get your, you make more.

17:13And what's the saying go you, you, you can make a lot of money, but do it in less time. I think that's what most women want to do. A lot of them don't have support teams or they don't have people coming in to delegate to because they're like, I'll just get faster on my own. It's cheaper if I just do it myself. And that comes from a state of hyper independence where they're over, they're overdoing and they're overperforming instead of allowing people to come in. So first thing I would do is hire a team, even if it's for four hours a week, five hours a week, get some support in. And they're like, well, I don't know what to give them to do.

17:43Delegate to them. That's the first thing. Start asking for help, you know? And then if somebody wants to hold the door open for you or put your suitcase above, even if you can do it, just say yes. You know, start receiving that. Someone give you a compliment, don't be like, Oh, this just this like, Oh, this is no, thank you. They want to pay for your dinner. Thank you. A lot of the times women won't let other people pay because they're like, don't want to owe somebody, or they don't want to feel like you have one up on them, because they're, they're, they're very concerned about how vulnerable they are to someone else, because it feels unsafe.

18:12So starting to receive is a big thing. And this is not about, I'll say this over and over again, it's not about having bubble baths, because then who's going to clean the damn tub, like you have to have the cleaning lady come on that day. It's about really, really relaxing into a place of trust. I would also start trying on I feel instead of I think now this goes against a lot of what other women say. But let me tell you, when you have learned to use your emotions to run your life and business, you will be so much more happier and aligned and wealthier, because it won't come from a place of I have to it'll become become from a place because I get to.

18:45So I always say look up the emotional wheel online, start identifying what those emotions are. Because when you're trying to attract a man into your world or money, it wants to know that it has a place to go, that it can receive you, that this is somebody that needs me, you know, that's going to come in and I'm going to provide something for them. And if women can are closed off and they have this wall because they haven't healed what's underneath, they're actually repelling a lot of the money. This is not to say they can't make money, but that money's being made probably an exhaustive state. So being able to let that emotions out are important.

19:16Another thing that I would do to get into that feminine is really have some downtime. Don't be so busy. You know, I know one of my clients, she's from Australia, she came to me. She's like, what is this relaxed thing you're talking about? She's like, how does people Netflix? Like, what do you do? I said, well, you just watch a show. And she's like, and that's it. You just sit there and watch the show. I'm like, yeah, that's, that's it. You know, having soft girl mornings are really important. A lot of women like waking up at 5am powered to them. I used to be one of those women, but having a regulated nervous system and waking up at an hour that feels great for me is more productive for me than having to wake up and getting everything under the sun done before 9am.

19:53I'm not saying one is right or wrong. I'm just saying I'm in my soft girl era right now, which is attracting millions. And I want it to be easy in this life. I don't know if it's my age or where I'm at, but that hustle culture, what I used to do before there was a time and place for it. It's not now for me, you know? So having a morning design the life that you want. If you have a day how it's supposed to look. Do that. Be her now is what I always say. If you know there's a version of you that's not really showing up at the way that you want, start doing it now. And listen, being able to activate that is going to attract more into your life than you've ever imagined before.

20:29It's easy. It becomes full. I just had a client right now. I was just on a call right before I got in here. And she's like, she just had her highest cash month. I've had 346 women break income ceilings that have had their highest cash month. And just today, she said, I haven't been able to break over, you know, I think it was 15 ,000 or 20 ,000. She came to work with me. She just had 50 ,000 and they're, they're scaled for more because she's learning that she doesn't have to do everything in her business. And she's like, I'm actually launching less and I'm making more because once you start instilling this type of energy, also running your business and your offers this way, you will, you will actually make more money because a lot of the times women's offers are packed with everything and the kitchen sink, they're giving everything away for one price.

21:08And I'm like, because they feel like they have to. And that is actually what I teach when I teach premium offers. I'm like, no, actually giving more is diluting the offer instead of structuring it a right way. So check into all your offers, how you're showing up in your business and what kind of life that you want to design for yourself and how much do you want to receive and what do you want to live like? Like I knew flying first class, going to the Malfi Coast with my kids and traveling and living a five star life was an absolute non-negotiable. So who do I need to be for that to happen for me?

21:38Well, I mean, you make it sound so easy, Shavita, and you've helped so many people do it. So you found a way. I know that you talk about core wounds. Can you share with us a little bit about the role that that plays and what that actually means? So everybody has three core wounds. They're either abandonment, betrayal, or unworthiness. And some people have more than one. And to be honest with you, when I first started studying this, I'm like, I have all. but really my core wound was unworthiness. You know, I had a narcissistic abusive father growing up when I was 16. I found out he was cheating on my mom and he was very abusive.

22:11And he tried to kill me when I was at that age, when I found out. And it was like, I had all of this unresolved trauma inside of my life. So I went into survival mode at a very young age. I had no protection from the masculine energy. So for me, I was always vying for validation or, Hey, look at me, look how great I am. This is, you know, I want someone to love me because I didn't have healthy attachments as a young child. You know, I don't feel about the attachment cycles. And so being able to be attached healthy is really important for children. And my mom was caught up in it. So she passed on her, you know, her mother wounds down to me.

22:44When your mother doesn't heal her trauma, she passed on the mother wounds to you. So I had it all. But what that does is it makes us go into a high performance state. So a lot of women who have unworthiness, they will perform. And I got three degrees, became a lawyer. I mean, it was like, what else can I do to like seek validation and being able to prove myself I can look in someone's business and their income and their bank account and their their stripe account and I can see the patterns in there and to see which core wound is actually happening for them let's say for abandonment sometimes a woman will have a really big month and the first thing that will come up is like oh my gosh how can I do this again next month or it's going to go away next month they immediately assume it'll go away and what will happen is they'll create income leaks in their business so they'll have car accidents so they'll have lawsuits so they'll not wired with their nervous system to hold big money.