Guest! Stop Trying to DO IT ALL! 🧠 w/GURU Legend - Jeremy Byars talking COGNITIVE LOAD | Ep. 465

0:00Welcome to Do This Not That, the podcast for marketers. We share quick tips, things you can do right now, and then we add a little bit of chaos at the end of every episode. We also keep it short, like this intro. Let's check it out. We are back for Do This Not That podcast, presented by Marigold, and we have possibly an all-time guest here today. We really do. A legendary guy, a good friend. Jeremy Byers is here. Who's Jeremy? I'm going to tell you who Jeremy is. Besides the fact that he's the chief communications officer at United Systems and Software, which, by the way, is this end-to-end technology, utility company, software solution.

0:41They work with over 1 ,500 customers in over 22 states. What he does, okay, for this company is he's responsible basically a lot. Okay, the company messaging and content collateral, all the HubSpot stuff, managing marketing, sales. He does a lot, but he's here for two reasons. One, he is you in that the guy has more on his plate than a human being can possibly handle, and he handles it. And we want to talk about how he does that. But the other thing that he has done, which I learned from every single day, is he leans in to communities that he participates in. Like in our MyUniverse, our Guru Media Hub community, he is in there commenting, participating in our webinars, our events.

1:24and he has built a network from this participation and he's elevated his career he's met all these people because he leans in to his human side and it makes everybody want to connect with him and we want to tap into his playbook what he's doing so jeremy it is an honor to have you here man what is up man hey where was the theme music i didn't hear any theme music we layer that in afterwards you can get all excited uh very fancy around here can we start over yeah you're crushing it already so by the way since everyone's hearing your voice i'm like wait a minute where's this dude from oh here it comes so are you right now in the woods like where are you um i'm not yeah i'm not far from it i'm originally from um a tiny town like i think my graduating class was 50 maybe uh in in western tennessee and my wife and i moved up here to Murray, Kentucky.

2:20And we've been here ever since. So I'm kind of, I guess, more a Kentuckian than I am a Tennessean now. And of course, most people will be like, what's the difference? And yes, exactly. You didn't marry like your cousin, though, or anything like that, right? No, but I think that's still legal in Kentucky. I think Connecticut just passed the law. But no, we actually, we grew up maybe 10 minutes apart, didn't know each other until we were 17 and or she was 17 and we've been together ever since so you know I'm mid 40s now so you can imagine how long uh how long this journey has been dude I have a question though in high school or whatever if you're graduating class like 50 people so let's call it 25 guys 25 girls whatever and so like would you just burn through like any available options within like the first like what do you do with that like who you're taking a problem you have no choice like like what happens in a situation like that?

3:14Man, I was a jock, but I was also kind of a nerdy jock. So, you know, you just take what you can get. I don't know what to say. I mean, yeah, I don't even remember that part of my life. And you're going to try to get me in trouble with my wife here. No, no, I'm not doing that. By the way, that was forever ago. You're calling yourself a jock. Of course you made the sports teams because who else would be on the team? You accomplished nothing. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. Let's talk before we get into community and all this stuff. I want to understand something because every time I check you out, you're doing a lot of stuff and you don't really complain about it, whatever.

3:56How do you handle having 45 different hats? Do you just go into the day saying, I got this, no problem? I think you have to in some ways. um you you have to approach every situation uniquely i think but at the same time you're there to do a job and you're there to provide in my opinion you're there to provide something positive to the company whether that could be internally or externally and and yet it just seems like every stop that i've been at i i do wear a lot of hats but at the same time i never up until probably recently, I've never really turned them down. And you sort of need to, you know, I was at a seminar actually last night with Evie Pomp, I got to get her last name right, Evie Pomporus.

4:48And she mentioned cognitive load. And I'm sort of at a point in my life where I am thinking a lot more about how much more can I take on? How much more should I take on? And And I'm at that point where, you know, my cognitive load is a lot. And at the same time, though, there's that constant pull of, is it still the best thing for the company or for the whatever that I'm the one leading this charge or doing this? And the struggle for me, and I think for probably a lot of people that are in similar roles, is it's very difficult to let go of that. and you want to be all things to all people, even though you might be saying externally, you can't be all things to all people, but, you know, maybe call it ego, call it pride, whatever it might be.

5:36It's very, very difficult to give that up. And thankfully, like I said, I'm a point in my life personally and an age where, you know, your body starts to tell you, you're not invincible. You're not, you can't be all things to all people. And you know what? But it's freeing to have the feeling or have the realization that there's always someone out there that's smarter, faster, cheaper. That's a huge one right now. And there's always someone out there who, let's just face it, probably has a little more drive than you. And that doesn't make you less than. That's just the way of the world. And if you're training your staff properly, the people that are under you, hopefully someone in your orbit is that person, because otherwise you're not doing your job right as a leader either.

6:31And, you know, I've had to realize that, that there's definitely smarter, faster, better people out there. And I just need to, you know, dig my heels in and do what I can do with the space that I'm given and the time that I'm given. Yeah, and I love that. I think getting real with yourself is super important. Knowing what you're good at, doubling down on what you're good at, and then finding out the people around you that can do the stuff that maybe you're not the best at. And also just the other thing that I'm always focused on is what is taking up a lot of my time that's garbage, right? Sometimes like the 80-20 rule, 80 % of my time is spent on stuff that's actually useless.

7:10So kind of auditing that I think is a big deal. But I want to pivot this thing. the other big thing about jeremy first of all he's probably one of the funniest dudes i've ever come across i mean we're gonna put his linkedin in the show notes you got to follow i mean legit out of control funny random dude of all time but one of the things that you've done the way that we got to know each other the way that you got onto this podcast for example is because you started commenting on posts that i put out there and then with the events that my company put on, you would show up in the chat and you would then network with the people that spoke at our events or attended our events, whatever.

7:47And you became a huge part of our community and everything that we're doing. And I think it's a playbook that a lot of people can lean into to really change their career. Were you intentional about this? Like, why did you all of a sudden be like, I'm going to be Jeremy, and I'm going to put Jeremy front and center?

8:10I don't know that it was intentional. I think it was – I think the stars aligned in a way, which that sounds extremely sort of over the top. But a lot of things happened in the last four or five years that really sort of bring all this together. And there's actually a quote that – another connection, Christina Garnett said actually this morning and she said, if you want a village, be a villager. And that one just floored me at 730 or whatever this morning, because that's really, I think, what I'm trying to do on LinkedIn and in these events that you're talking about. And even in my in my work, my actual work life, where it's not about being, as I said, greater than anybody else or being better than anybody else.

9:00It's about, you know, being a part of that community. And the more digitized we all become, whether we want to or not, the less that that community feeling exists. And there's a lot of people that are struggling, whether they are in, you know, they've got job insecurity or they have no job right now currently, or they're just dealing with crippling imposter syndrome, which I deal with one or two times a week without question. So for me, I just I want to be evidence as much as I can that. You know, we're really here just for a short amount of time. Let's have some fun with it. Let's let's try to bring everybody together.

9:44Let's have empathy. Let's have respect. And let's let's provide an avenue where people can can can smile, can can laugh, can can fail. because here's the thing. The thing about trying to be funny and I appreciate the comments, but gosh, I struggle with it so mightily. The thing about that is it's kind of like sales and I'm not a salesperson. I don't lead sales. It's awful. I hate it. But the thing about comedy is you fail so many more times than you succeed. And I'm terrible more times than I'm really good. and um you know it's kind of like um i'll give you a good analogy so you had a spam eating contest was that last year at guru yeah yeah that was last year so have you tried the korean barbecue spam oh my gosh it's well you're like from western kentucky i feel like that's what you guys eat like every tuesday korean barbecue i mean i don't know what the hell goes on with you and spam if they had if they had mutton flavored uh spam i would be mutton yeah try it let's we'll offline about mutton later.

10:52I'm having mutton tomorrow actually. But anyway, what was I saying? Oh, yeah. Spam. So it's like Spam. Spam's got a lot of varieties, right? Some of them are total trash. Yes. The original is fine. Turkey's fine. Green barbecue, highly recommended as I said. But like brands, I mean, what we don't see a lot of times with brands, even as hyper aware as we all are of everyone's mistakes and failures. Cracker Barrel, you know, comes to mind, which don't get me started on that. I mean, I hold Cracker Barrel dearly. I will fight somebody about that situation. But anyway, we still don't see all the things that don't make it to the decision board.

11:40You know, what we see are the failures that get past the finish line. But What about all the things that fail before you even get there? And I think for a lot of folks, particularly on LinkedIn and Guru Conference and Delivered and all of the things that, you know, I participate in with you and your team, there's a lot of people out there that because they have so many failures, and I'm air quoting for the folks that are just listening, because they have so many failures before you even get to that visible thing, right? the thing that the world has to see or that at least your decision makers in your company has to see, I want them to understand that's totally normal and that's totally fine.

12:23I mean, I've got a blog post that I'm pushing out, I guess today at some point and two or three times, I mean, I've just rewritten and rewritten and it should be table stakes for me. The content is so basic for utilities in this case. And, you know, even somebody like me that's been doing this for 15, 20 years, writing and storytelling and whatever, it's constant. And so this, I feel like this gives us a great opportunity, people of your stature and people on the other end of the spectrum like me that don't have that type of stature to really bridge that gap with folks and say, Hey, we're a hundred percent all in this together.

13:08Every single one of us, whether you've been doing this for 30 years, whether you're making X number of dollars or you're not making anything because you've been laid off. Um, we're all in this together. And I don't know if that rambling answer answers your question. I'm still thinking about the mutton spam that doesn't exist, but, uh, well, I'll tell you, it, it does, it means a lot. And, and, and we're all on the same, you know level i think anybody that thinks that they're doing better or this that whatever they're they're clowns and i don't even want to i don't even want to know from them and i learn from you every day because um you are very real you are willing to be yourself and show up as yourself and i will tell you every single day i i struggle with trying to be me uh i also struggle I mean, I've been in my agency business for 27 years.

14:01And I will tell you every single week, I feel imposter syndrome that I suck at my job, that this is the end. I don't know what I'm doing. And for anybody out there that thinks that somebody that you think is doing so great and all this stuff that they're not, whatever, I freak out every day. Ask my wife every single day. I'm the most annoying person on earth. So you being so willing to kind of just be out there and be yourself, other than the fact you have some weird things that you're into. So let's get into judging you for a minute. Real quick before you start to hammer me. It's also not a aha moment either.

14:38I don't believe that if people are looking for this aha moment where it's like they're suddenly no longer dealing with this negative thought or this weight on their shoulders or whatever the case may be, I don't think that exists. For me personally, I had a series of failures and trials that sort of got me this. I mean, when I was a VP at a finance or sorry, before that, I was a VP at a book company that we had some malfeasance at the upper echelons and the whole thing went to crap. I mean, we had to lay off a hundred and something people. Personally, I had to sit in that room and tell each of them, Hey, it's not your fault.

15:11We've had some weird stuff happen at the top and there's things missing that shouldn't be there and blah, blah, blah. You can look it up. It's going to be on TV at some point. And then shortly thereafter that, a few years later, you know, I took a job outside of my comfort zone and I didn't do fantastic at it. And it was the first time really that I, you know, started to really question my decisions about my career because I started out wanting to be a teacher and I did teach for about three years and it didn't pay enough. I'm just being honest with you. It didn't pay anything. And that's terrible.

15:49But But then when my wife got sick a few years back, and it's perfectly healthy now as far as we know, but when she got leukemia suddenly, it was like, then suddenly that was like the final thing. There was a series of things that were just chipping away at that ego a little bit, chipping away at that feeling of am I doing enough? Am I enough? Really, yeah, am I enough, period. period and then when i had to be a caretaker and and when i saw her be such a freaking fighter like yeah in a way that i could never be um and then to see us both sort of grow in that and then then it was suddenly that moment where it was like you know what all that noise that i have in my in my head all of that um all of that that sort of self uh pity in some ways like i'm not good enough uh all that again all that just just distortion going in my brain on a regular basis about i i you know i'm not making enough as this person or hey this person just got promoted i can do their job 30 times over and all this negative stuff that truthfully told was in my brain all this is just uh in some cases is this hatefulness that i that i was thinking all that finally just sort of washed away after those series of events and particularly when you know when the universe hit me right in the cojones a little bit and said, dude, you're not in control.

17:16So ride the wave, you know? And, and so that's, I want people to realize that, you know, if you're in that position, you know, don't wait for this, you know, grand thing to happen. You know, it's a, it's a, it's a stair step. You'll get there. You'll definitely get there. I love that. I mean, just wake up every morning and coming from a place of gratitude for the stuff that is going well in your life. That's, that's the way to start your day. It's hard for me now to rip on you after that after you're sharing all that but i'm not i'm gonna i'm gonna power through i'm gonna see if i could do that okay so so before we got recording here jeremy kind of scanned in his house and he showed me this other room because he's at home right now and he showed me this room that's filled with easily i don't know 500 different superman type of like uh nostalgia collectible items hey by the way have you seen the movie have you seen no i haven't seen the new movie and i'll tell you why it looks horrible and also superman is the worst superhero of all time and i really think that it's extremely weird the level of superman items that you own what is your actual problem

18:25um so i'm gonna turn so i know you're waiting for me to do some bits and be jokey but i'm gonna turn it on his head so so i'm gonna be real real real with you so oh um i had a i had a uh we'll just say a problematic childhood i had some some stuff go down and one of the constants when when we were moving as much as we were and dealing with what we were dealing with was uh was i had this um super friends coloring book from it would have been from 76 i think because it predates me but I had it. Um, and I had, um, this one figure, which I'm looking for, but basically it's the old version of this guy right here.

19:05This is the newest one that just came out, right. Uh, from 1984, I believe. Um, my wife bought me a new version a few years back, of course, but those are the only two constants really in my life. And I'm not, that's not really much of an exaggeration besides my grandparents. Those were the only two constants was that freaking chewed up coloring book and that that tiny little toy. So Superman's always been this again, this this sort of this anchor for me. And and despite what you say about the movie, the movie is all about hope and about positivity and about empathy. And that's really the point in my life that I'm at.

19:45So if I can sort of lean into that and be a nerd, dork, doofus, as you say, and really just kind of have that moment where it doesn't matter. All right. Now, before we run out of time, I need to know this. This is the only clip we're going to use from this episode, I promise you. What is non-Superman movies, okay? And no movie that a Superman character was in. what are your top five superhero movies oh i thought you're gonna go non-superhero because i've got a solid non-superhero no i want to know your superhero ones oh you want to go non-superhero fine hit me with your non-superhero well number one number one is both it's the dark knight it's an amazing film that's an amazing and it's a film it's you know it's actually a film i agree uh and then number two is inception i own a christopher nolan kick inception is is amazing uh and then after that, I'm a real, I love the Back to the Future movies.

20:43I'm such a dork, but you know, of course they're dated now because we're long past the future in those, but, um, but yeah, it's just, it's just a guilty pleasure. I've always loved those. And those two have sort of a, uh, there's a reason behind, behind those as well, but yeah, those are my top three. I don't know that I can give you four or five. We've lost every listener. Okay. Uh, would you agree though, back to the future three the western theme was terrible and would you also agree that superman the old series where it had richard pryor that movie was terrible and then the one where they had the guy from the sun was terrible do you agree on all of that from the sun i can't even right now he wasn't from the sun um you're talking about superman four quest for peace by the way yeah no uh the um i'll be again totally transparent here the original christopher reed movies despite the replica newspaper I have behind me.

21:37I don't love them. I really don't. Not the first one? What are you talking about? I don't think they age well at all. I think they're way too hokey. And if there's any Superman fans listening, they're going to probably roast me later. They should roast you. But yeah, Back to the Future 3 was epic. That ending, that open ending with the train, come on. Terrible. Mary's theme version, she was amazing. No. Ted Danson's wife. That's also a great podcast. I know, that's a really good thing. That's a great show, by the way. Like Ted Danson's show, what the hell is it called? The next season's coming out on Netflix in November.

22:08Have you listened to his podcast though? Yeah, it's not bad. It's not bad. It's not bad. Well, aren't we fancy? Well, speaking of not bad, you're not bad. Jeremy, we're going to put it in the show notes. We're going to put your LinkedIn in there. What should everyone do to get involved with your world? Or are you too important? You don't want anybody kind of connecting with you. No, absolutely. LinkedIn is really the only thing that I spend any time on. So I'm the only Jeremy Byers on there that I know of. So J-E-R-E-M-Y-B-Y-A-R-S, not with an E, because we were illiterate when we came over from Scotland.

22:41Yeah. And just, you know, if you're in the utility industry, I'd love to chat, of course. But definitely find me on LinkedIn. Hey, and despite what Daniel Murray says, Jay, you're not too bad. I mean, you're a pretty good dude. I'll text him right after this. You're awesome, man. I can't thank you enough for just being the absolute most incredible member of the Guru Media Hub community. You're a legend. Thanks for doing this. And we'll check you soon. All right, man. Take care. You did it. You made it to the end. But wait, the party is not over. Listen, I want to keep hanging out. Subscribe to this podcast.

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