MADELINE ARGY: THE REAL REASON I STARTED TIKTOK

0:00Does it ever feel like you're a marketing professional just speaking into the void? But with LinkedIn ads, you can know you're reaching the right decision makers, a network of 130 million of them. In fact, you can even target buyers by job title, industry, company, seniority, skills. And did I say job title? See how you can avoid the void and reach the right buyers with LinkedIn ads. Spend$250 on your first campaign and get a free$250 credit for the next one. Get started at LinkedIn.com slash campaign. Terms and conditions apply. Hi, this is Knox from the podcast with Knox and Jamie. And maybe like us at the Popcast, you also know people who have been smokers or vapors.

0:37And Zen is the one product it seems like everyone is talking about. Because there are many good reasons to make a change to Zen nicotine pouches. Reasons like Zen nicotine pouches are still America's number one choice for smoke-free, hands-free nicotine satisfaction. And you can choose between 10 varieties, each variety available in either 3 or 6 milligrams. Check out zen.com slash find to find Zen at a store near you. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Hello everyone, we're Jamie and Sophie. You may remember us from Nearlyweds and then Newlyweds. But now guys, things are about to get even wilder as we take on our biggest adventure yet, becoming parents.

1:16Yeah, that's right. Newlyweds is now Nearly Parents and we're bringing you the same honest, heartwarming takes on our journey to parenthood, I guess. Join us as we find out what it really means to become a family while trying not to kill each other. Get ready for Nearly Parents, your favourite new podcast.

1:38Hello everyone, my name is Jamie Lang and this is Great Company.

1:47Howdy partner. Howdy doody. Top of the morning. That's not cowboy though, cowgirl. Howdy. How's your day going? Yeah, all right. All the better for seeing you. Yeah, you are by the way. What? Who are you? Oh, sorry. Hello, I'm Jemima. No, I'm the producer. God. Yeah. And that is why I'm not on the mic. This is Jemima, our producer. Jemima is the person behind the microphone, behind the camera. You're the person who makes all of this whole thing tick. And you are? Jamie, I'm the host. Yeah. Of great company. We spoke about last time how my interviewing skills have, you think, have got a little bit better.

2:23Do you still think they're good? Do you want me to tell you I'm proud of you again? Yes. I'm proud of you. Thank you so much. I think that's the nicest thing someone can say to you. That makes my heart feel full. I know exactly what you mean. But sometimes I don't know whether not everyone can do it. You know, some people, when they say they're proud of you, you're like, all right, who are you? Yeah, who the hell are you? I remember when I played rugby when I was younger and our captain, a guy called Charlie, came up to me at the end of the game and said, well played. And for me, it was like the greatest moment because he'd never said that to me.

2:51The biggest thing that can make me cry or make me emotional is when I see proudness, when people are proud. Yeah, I agree. And it's a lovely thing if someone wants to accept you saying that they're proud So if you, if that, if I say I'm proud of you And you're like, thanks, that also means something to me It's so true That you'll accept that Hey, today we have a episode with Madeline Argy Huge Huge Madeline But also she's actually very small She's very petite Madeline is a TikToker, social media sensation She's got a hit podcast She has a hit podcast called Pretty Lonesome, which is part of the Unwell Network, which is owned by Alex Cooper in the States.

3:34Call her daddy. Call her daddy. I mean, Madeline is a force. I know. And you've been trying to get her. For ages on this podcast. Yeah, you're in her DMs like nobody's business. I DMed her probably three years ago. Yeah. Trying to get her on my podcast. She ignored me. We then went to a dinner that I sat next to at the dinner. and I didn't mention it there but we got on very well and since then I've kind of just kept an eye on her I don't know why that sounds very weird not eye that way but like just being there around her making sure that she's okay I know her manager really well Madden rarely does any interviews I know this is so exciting she rarely doesn't because she's you know she's a self she had selective mutism when she was a kid she did you've been reading the notes I've been reading the notes well done so when you do just quickly can I understand this as a producer So when you do, because you do a research call with whoever we're having on.

4:27Did you do it with Madeline? Yeah. Give me your thoughts. Do you know what? I went into it thinking like that she would be like, I don't like being interviewed. And she was so great on the course. So chatty. I think it's going to be really, really fun. Also, Madeline was an inspiration to me once. Why? About looking for a sign, but I'm going to save it for the episode. Ooh. Yeah, I'm going to save it for the episode. I'm excited for that. Are you ready for this one? I am. I think this is going to be a really fun one. All right. Hold on to your fricking hats, everybody. I thought it was hold on to your horses.

4:57Hold on. No. No, hats. Hold on to your hats. Put your feet in the ground. We have liftoff? Yeah, it kind of works. You do it. I can't. All right, here we go. Enjoy the episode with Madeline Argy on Great Company. Hi, I'm Madeline Argy and I'm Great Company. I remember speaking to you a year ago and I remember seeing you on the TikTok. Oh my god Doing you on TikTok And you're talking about DJs Oh yeah It's one of the greatest TikToks ever You were discussing what DJs actually do Yeah And you were emotional In the video I saw a tear There was a few, I had a puddle You had a puddle Because you were so concerned about what DJs Are doing And you put this video, how many views did that get?

5:51I have no idea. 30 million? I think there was an edit of the video that got like 100 million or something. And that was the guy that made like the big remix of it. Someone remixed you. Yeah. Into a DJ set. Yeah. At a festival. Yeah. It's so embarrassing. It's not embarrassing. That's the fucking coolest thing ever. I couldn't be more jealous. You kidding me? I want someone to clip me up and chuck it in there 100%. It's unbelievable. Surely at that point, do you go, things are getting pretty wild right now? Do you know what? For some reason, I had no idea that that happened at the time. No fucking clue.

6:32I didn't see that video. Not only did I not see that video, I didn't notice that my DJ video had got a lot of views. Not a clue why. And then I go to fashion week and this guy comes up to me. He's like, I need to know, like, were you doing any of this before your DJ video? I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? He was like, is the DJ thing, is that what opened the door for you to be at like this Prada show right now? I was like, no. This was a video I posted last night. What the fuck are you talking about? And then I like kind of looked into it and I was like, oh, I should have played on this.

7:02Like this is, why am I not, I should have started my DJ career or something off the back of that. I could have. You could have done that. I think that would, you could, you could become a DJ. I should. And then, it wouldn't be hard. And then, because you know what? None of them told me any, Like no one came to me And said this to me The only thing I'd be concerned about is like I like when the DJs dance behind the booth But I can't do that You just stand still I'll get backup dancers You should do that You could do it I'll do it I'll be your backup dancer And it'd be really relatable to the audience So they'd be like Oh my god That's exactly what they want to see

7:43I feel like I'm a secret stalker of yours Okay I feel like I'm a secret stalker because I reckon I DM'd you what was it three years ago that's impressive maybe two years ago how many years ago you won't remember this did I respond no you didn't maybe you did maybe you did respond I came across you on TikTok and straight away I was like this person is so engaging like so interesting the way that you were creating these funny narratives out of nothing it was so and I was like this is just great and I messaged you I think I don't know what I could find it somewhere saying like I love your content or like hey great and I asked you to come on my podcast then this was another podcast I had totally blanked me yeah you just just totally You quagged me.

8:42I'm sorry. Don't worry, I'm over it. Clearly. But I did that. And then we sat next to each other at a dinner. Do you remember this? Yes. You remember this? Yes, yes, yes. Because that was, was that not the day before I, what was I doing the next? You were flying to LA? No, I was going on Radio 1. You were. Because you bailed me out of the dinner, I'm pretty sure. Yes. Tell this story. So what happened? We were at a dinner, weren't we? Yes. Oh my God, I forgot about this. And they, can we say this? The brand won't get offended. I won't say that. And like Joe, let's just make up a random brand. Okay.

9:19Google. It's a made-up word, isn't it? Yes. So I wanted to leave and go see my friend who had just like flown back into the country. And I told you, you lied and told the people that like run the brand. I had a 6 a.m. call time with you. Was it with you? Oh my God, did I say that? Because they did this awful thing where we had been sat next to each other for a good two hours. Yeah. I think this was the dinner. There was 14 courses we figured out. Do you remember that? Oh my God. And I went in on the first course, not realizing we had another hundred to go. And I was like, oh my God, by the end.

9:58Yeah. It was so excessive. 14 courses. And it was like every hour you would get one. They were slow. And then they did a mixer. They said, everyone get up and change seats, go to the opposite end of the table and sit next to someone new. And that was when I left. Fuck off. It's actually my worst night when people do that. So uncool, but I've never had it done to me since. Have you not? That's an insane thing to do at a brand dinner. Because why do people want to do that? Because I suppose they want to mix around, but like... Why? Because you get comfortable with one person and then as soon as you get comfortable, bye, they go.

10:35And then you're like, hello, do you like dolphins? to the next one because you just run out of everything. Yeah, no, that was not going to happen. Do you get awkward in situations like that? Yes. You do? Yes. I don't go to situations like that anymore because it's just not worth it. Really? Yes. Unless I know someone going, which is like never, I just won't go. Why? Because what? What is the fear? Four hours of small talk with someone I don't want to speak to. That's like 15 years older than me. Who hasn't? You're honestly describing me. No. I had so much fun that night, though. We had good conversations.

11:20I don't remember what we spoke about. We had a great conversation. But I always have with you. But get me back on to that. But why? Because you're great at conversation. No, you are. What is the fear? I really want to know. What is the fear? Because a lot of people have social anxiety and different things like that. What is the fear that you're going into that? What do you fear that's going to happen? No, I don't have social anxiety. Common misconception. Okay, give it to me then. I just hate it. Like I just have no interest in it. Why would I? Like it doesn't compute in my head why that would be enjoyable for anyone ever.

11:50I want to talk to my friends, but then I get it. How are you going to make friends if you don't like go do some small talks? Sometimes I just don't care about it. But I'm not anxious. I never get nervous walking in. I feel like I could walk into a room full of like 500 strangers and I wouldn't be concerned. And I would go home and I wouldn't double think anything I said. Just go straight to it. Like no social anxiety. And I don't know why, but I just hate it. Because I also don't know what to say. Like my brain doesn't come up with things. Like someone will sit in front of me and speak and I just don't, I can't respond.

12:20I'm like, I just haven't had a thought in five minutes. That is so impressive. Because it's the complete opposite of what, yeah, misconceptions you said. Because what most people don't like going to things like that is because they have, we're socially anxious, right? because we're thinking, shit, what are we going to say? How are we going to react? Are they going to like me? All those kind of things. Yours is the total opposite. You're like, no, I'm really assured of myself. I don't get social. I can walk straight in. I just can't be bothered. I just don't want to because I want to talk to my friends, people that I like.

12:48Why do I want to talk to a stranger who I don't know? It makes total sense. Thank you. But did that mean that it was tricky to potentially make friends growing up? Yeah. I've always been someone that's had like one friend, but like a best friend like all through like I have like four separate girls that I've grown up with but each have had like a four-year stint until we've like grown apart or like they're still my friends but it's like my best friend anymore like we go to different schools or universities we move away from each other whatever I've always my life is defined by like best friends but I've never been in a friend group or anything so I just have one person at a time and then that's it so wait so you you have a best friend and then something happens where you move across the country or go to different schools and then it ends.

13:36You don't grieve that friendship? No, yeah. Like, well, I have had one best friend since I was 13 and she's still my best friend, but we don't live near each other. So then I have another person at the moment who I met maybe like a year ago that I would say is like my, like my person at the moment. Like I'm always with her. I text her, like we're currently in each other's lives. But then I have my longstanding best friend knows everything about me like soulmate type shit and then i have like a couple childhood best friends i just don't speak to anymore and i do not grieve those ones i did not like them you didn't no i mean i did at the time and i grew up wow i have a really hard thing with friendships sometimes because i um i think because i'm such a people pleaser you're you're almost like the opposite of a people pleaser in like a great way people please is not a good thing by the way.

14:29I'm complimenting you. It sounds like I'm not, I failed, but I really am. I'm such a people pleaser that I cling onto friendships that are definitely not, haven't been great and haven't been good. And as I've got older, but much older, I've realized actually, okay, that's probably not good. It's okay that people leave and they come into your lives and that's totally fine. And maybe I wasn't right for them or they weren't right for me, but that's okay to let those things go. Well, and you can't, you struggle to see that in the moment. That's fair enough though i totally struggle with it yeah i don't know why like i have a friend of mine who we were friends for so long we've fallen out i haven't fallen out with him but he fell out with me and i'm still like grieving it right how long ago a year that's fine how long were you friends 20 years okay so that's fine is that okay yes shit i feel like sometimes it's psycho not to but but some people can just switch that off and go oh whatever move on but that's but you wouldn't do that about like if you had a 20 year long romantic relationship and then they cut you off like you wouldn't be over that quickly but I always feel like some of my friendships are more intense than my romantic relationships especially the girl I've been best friends with since I was 12 if she cut me off I would think I would literally go insane especially if she didn't tell me why no I would go insane talk me through that though because that feels because I listen to I listen to your podcast right and two things which really stood out by the way I love it it's so good.

15:53It's so great. One thing which is, you've taught me something, which I'll tell you in a second. Another thing is when you talk about friendship and you explain friendship in such a great way where you don't understand why people just become friends with anyone. For you, and quote me for a moment, friendship is one of the most beautiful, most important things in life. And you should almost pick your friends wiser than you pick a relationship sometimes. Oh yeah. But why? Explain that to me. I just feel like it's weird how not normalized that is like my friends like they're gonna be at my wedding but like my partner might not be like my current partner might not be like why would I not prioritize that when I get into like a friendship I'm expecting so much more longevity than I would be with like going on a date or like having a relationship like in my head I don't know maybe it was just the way I was raised like in my head relationships don't necessarily last forever like what 50 % of marriages and then divorce like that's just like something that's in the back of my head but like my mom still has her childhood best friend and like her school friends they're still her best friends I've just always kind of seen this like played out of like you you keep your friends and I've I don't know like that it's just like it's second nature to me just to think that way i don't know why and like they they're like a home base like i don't like i can go out in the world and meet crazy people and do crazy things but i have to have like this home to come back to and that's like my friends like i i wouldn't feel comfortable going out in the world and like dating and having relationships if i didn't have friends to like fall back on i don't know like i take it so seriously and also like i feel like they can like if you have the wrong friendship that can go so much more wrong sometimes than the wrong relationship why because you get you you get led down the wrong way i think because it's it's almost like harder to see because you're not so focused in on like who they are all the time or like not over analyzing it in the same way you might if you're like in love with somebody i feel like it's easier to let things slip through the cracks and then you could have someone in your life that that seriously shouldn't be there.

18:08Like that could fuck you up so much more long-term as opposed to like someone does something a bit weird in a relationship. You're going to think about it and you're going to analyze it and you're going to decide, do I want this? Do I not want this? Whereas I've had friends that like in hindsight were terrible people and I didn't notice for like five or six years. Cause I just wasn't thinking about it when I was like a teenager. I just didn't give it any thought and it probably did more damage than any bad relationship I've ever been in. That is such great advice Thank you Honestly That is It's so I've never thought of it like that You're so right with friendships Right?

18:41Where Friendships You're not lasered in on it Because they're just part You're just friends Right? Whatever In a romantic relationship You're checking every movement You're like Considering it You're conscious of yourself So you're You're right And so then you get people Who probably aren't great for you Coming in Because you're just not even Taking notice of it Hmm The other thing Wait, does that make us friends? I hope so Well, I don't know I'm friends with you Yeah, I'm friends with you too But then how do you know if you're friends with you? What do you mean? Well, I don't know Because you pick your friends wisely Yeah Well, I don't speak to people that I don't consider my friends Okay, I've got it Validated, alright I feel much better now I've got a short torso Which I found out recently Oh, really?

19:28Yeah So I roll around like 5 '10". On a good day. Yes. Yeah, okay. But what I worked out is that my legs are quite short, but also my torso. I thought I had a long torso. I don't. So you're just short then? Yeah. If your legs and your torso are short. You got it right. Yeah, you've nailed it. I'm just short. Apart from, I went to a doctor once and I had a knee operation. I had my ACL reconstructed. Right. And the doctor, I must've been about 18. He said, Oh, the good news you've done your knee, but the good news is, is you've got a lot of space in your knees. It means you're going to grow. And so since I was 18, I thought I was going to grow.

20:11Never happened. Well, yeah, it didn't happen. Yeah. I have a friend like that. Who's your friend? Joe. Do you know how, I kid you not. It's like growing up, my biggest insecurity was, like being it was being little I used to every single picture so I Joe Joe I feel your pain he's gonna kill me yeah I thought you why don't you just make up a name you could have said anything you could have said anything you went my friend Joe I used to I used to stand on my tiptoes in every photo oh bless you because I felt like I wasn't and then to the point where I then got these things on Amazon which were called lifts I can't believe it.

20:56Are you interviewing me? Am I just, that's what's going on. Okay. Yeah. So when I was, I went all these things on Amazon called lifts, right? Which you put in your shoes. I've seen these. That's really sad. It was really sad. Do you still do it? No, I don't. I definitely don't. But what I thought about doing again, but then I didn't. What happened was is that you put them in your shoes and they basically act as sort of the high heels in your shoes. They give you like an inch. Right. And I was like, this is wicked. After about, I reckon, three months of wearing these things, my heels started to really hurt.

21:27And I was like, what is going on there? Went to the doctor and they say, you have something called plantar fasciitis. And I was like, well, what the hell is that? They said, have you been like standing on your tiptoes a lot? And I was like, oh God. I said, well, I've been putting these in my shoes. And they went, well, that's what it is. What happens is, is that the ligament, the plantar fascia ligament in my foot became so weak because it wasn't being used because I was on high heels at the time that it basically had a little tear in it. And then I almost got something called floppy foot. Really?

21:58What, that's the actual term for it? The actual term is floppy foot, which is where your foot just becomes floppy. And anything like that. That's absolutely disgusting. What were your insecurities? Get into it, come on. What were your insecurities growing up? Nothing that intense. I never like bought anything on Amazon to try and like I used to put um I read somewhere that the whites of eggs would help bleach freckles away so I used to mix egg whites and lemons and put it on my face to get rid of my freckles because I thought they were horrible it didn't work that is the sweetest thing I've ever heard so you so explain that so you heard that the the egg whites would get rid of freckles.

22:45Yeah. Like it had like bleaching powers or something. So I would like put it all over my face. My God. Do you know what? It's funny. I had, I had, whenever I go in the sun, I get freckles as well. And I used to get, why are we insecure about things like freckles? That shouldn't matter, right? I don't know. Cause now everyone loves freckles, but growing up, I don't know why it was like such a thing. It was so embarrassing to have them. And I was covered. I like grew out of mine. Like I still have them, but I used to be like, like I look like someone with red hair when they, they go in the sun, like fully covered.

23:14And they just went? I think it's an age thing. They just like stop getting so, right? Maybe it's an age thing. But I think imperfections and things like that, that's what makes people. Now I love all that stuff. But growing up, we just, I know what you mean. Growing up, we feel like we need to kind of slightly fit in and anything that makes us not fit in, whether it's freckles or height or hair or whatever it is, we start to feel a bit like awkward about it, I suppose. Yeah. Can you tell me as well, because reading through, I think a lot of people don't realise as well, they just see you on TikTok sometimes telling funny stories and they love you and all this kind of stuff.

23:49But sometimes they don't actually know the real Madeleine. And like, you've been through a lot. You have though. Like, and I mean, you talk about hard times. I always think I like doing podcasts because you go from light to shade and all these different things. And, and I had tricky times and I found out that you suffered with anxiety. You know, maybe you still do, but when you were a kid, you had, you were having panic attacks and things like that. Can you, when did that start? Oh, I think I was like six. Really? Yeah. Do you find it easy to talk about it or? Yeah. Okay, great. Yeah. Right. So tell me about it.

24:31I don't know. I mean, I started to have panic attacks when I was like six, but they were like far and few and far between. Is that the same? Few and far between. Yeah. And, um, I don't know. It was never really dealt with. Um, what do they feel like at the time? Cause six is very young. Yeah. Like really young. At the time, I actually heard something on Tik TOK and I don't know if this is what it was. Cause this was like, I literally saw like two Tik TOKs about it, but it was this thing, Alice in Wonderland syndrome or something. syndrome is definitely not the right word i actually heard of alice in wonderland syndrome yeah when it's like one thing suddenly like i don't know it's like you get so overwhelmed by the amount of or how small you are and everything suddenly literally looks huge to you so i used to lay in bed and okay you know how this wall has like paint on it and it's like textured and there's like a million little bumps yeah so i would like look at them and i would literally look at them break out in like a hot sweat and i would jump out of bed well because they were coming almost coming out uh-huh and then my whole room would like start spinning and it would be so huge and for this reason i couldn't go to the beach for years because of the sand and it would freak me the fuck out and like i remember i used to every time i panic i think i'm gonna throw up this is like what start like started the ball rolling for me so i would look at my wall freak the fuck out jump out of bed uh then think i'm gonna throw up and then the way i would detract from all this fix it was i would like create such a big scene that everyone had to focus on this thing that i'd just done rather than anyone know i was panicking or me even remember that i was panicking so i remember i had this habit where i had this big bookshelf in my room and i would just push it over and it would be like 3 a.m i'd push it over my books go everywhere and then i'd just scream and then my parents would have to come in and be like what the fuck and like pick up my books and because they were causing a distraction yeah i was so focused on the mess that i would start to calm myself down be like okay fine or i would like walk into my parents room literally and just scream and wake them up and then i'd be like oh my god they're focused on me screaming now they're yelling at me i will be fine like i used to scream all the time or like throw myself on the floor so they'd be like are you okay and i'd be like wow just anything obviously that didn't work for my whole life like i when i became a teenager that wasn't gonna that wasn't flying no so then i just started having panic attacks like without a cure oh my god are you kidding me that is so upsetting is it yeah it is upsetting because you um because you're making a distraction because you're so you don't want you you want to be you want to distract yourself from this and you don't want people to notice that something's happening to you so you're causing a distraction so you can calm yourself down.

27:16Yeah. Kind of a good technique. It's a great technique. It's a defense mechanism. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So when did that stop happening? I think when I got too old for it, I think probably 13. Cause I, I like, this would only happen like every couple of months maybe to me as a kid or like maybe not even that. And it just got more and more frequent as I grew up. And then when I was like 13, I just started year nine and I'd had my first real panic attack that summer where I was like at a steakhouse with my family and I just suddenly couldn't breathe, hot, needed to go outside. Like the way they kind of still look for me now, like that was my first one and it came out of nowhere and it was the middle of the day and I was like, what the fuck?

28:07Um, and then I - Shortness of breath, think you're having a heart attack. Yeah. That vibe, yeah. and i just had the one and then i had another one like three weeks later and i thought i was just sick i thought like i had a virus because i was like why do i feel so unwell like hot flushes nausea my stomach hurts like because it kind of mimics that like it mimics like you ate something bad for me anyway and then i went back to school and like within a week of being back at school i was every single day like having panic attacks to the point that i just ended up leaving school because i could no one could get me to go in or stay in they would get me in in the morning and And then I would leave.

28:42You would just go? Yeah, I couldn't stay there. It was just like, I would just sit and cry and shake all day. And everyone was like, what the fuck is wrong with you? And no one knew. No one told me, hey, you're having a panic. Is it that fucking hard? Surely not. Why the fuck? Why don't people, why are they not, what are they saying is wrong? They just. Yeah, I had this head of year. Worst woman I've ever met in my life. I hate her. She thought I was faking. But I'm like, I was like a good kid. I'd like never really had any issues at school. Like it was just me and my little best friend, like minding our business.

29:15Like I didn't even have like a big friend, like no trouble. And then I start having these panic attacks and she's like, liar. What the fuck? Are you serious? In her office, shaking, crying. She's my head of year. Like there's nowhere else I can go other than the nurse and no one thinks I'm sick. So I'm at her office because that's where the troublesome children are sent. I'm like shaking, crying, begging her to call my mom. I remember she used to come out. I'd say I felt sick. She used to come out and she'd offer me chocolates to see if I would take one to see if I really felt sick. And I knew what she was doing.

29:45I was like, I'm not fucking stupid. I'm not taking your chocolates. I get a box of like heroes. And I just remember thinking like this, like what the fuck? Can she just help me? I can't breathe. It's so horrible. And then yeah, cause no one like would believe me or like knew what was wrong with me. They wouldn't help me. So I just kind of, my mom, they ended up being like, we're going to find you loads of money because she's like not coming into school and her attendance is low and my mom was like help like it's not a choice and they wouldn't help so she had to pull me out of the school otherwise they were gonna like take her to court and that's crazy that you were just a sick kid and no one was doing anything what is that they just didn't help man it's it's strange when that sort of happens because I remember um I had a panic attack when I was about 22 years old and And I didn't, same as you didn't know what the hell was going on.

30:35And I've told this story before, but I went to hospital and took myself to hospital and said, I'm dying. And they're like, no, you're not. You're having a panic attack. Go home. And I was like, all right. So I went home and I just didn't tell anyone for like six years. Really? Yeah, I just, it wasn't, it was quite a long time. For six months, I tell you, I, it was for six years I had, I was panicking. But the real, the real, help me. Feel sorry for me, right? Okay. This is the moment you feel sorry for me I was having a panic attack

31:10Sounds so shit Anyway I was having this panic attack And didn't know what the hell was wrong with me And I was then so afraid to tell anyone That I was feeling these things Because I thought it made me alien, made me different, made me strange And the only thing I could say to my friends For the next six months When I was basically living in fear That's the only way to describe it It felt like I was living in fear the entire time. I just said, do you ever feel like you're scared? And they were like, yeah, we watched like a horror movie. I don't know what you're talking about. And I said, no, do you ever feel like you're sort of scared all the time?

31:40And they were just like, no, and no one could explain it to me. And when no one explains something to you, you just think you're sick. Yeah. It's tough, isn't it? Yeah. That's, wow, they said no. I feel like there's few people you can ask that question to and they just go, no. Yeah, but now it's different. I think this is, I'm 24. So this is, I'm 35. So this is, you know, this is like 12 years ago or something. It's like 12, 13 years ago. When people, when mental health, it wasn't talked about. It wasn't said. No one said anything. You go to anyone now and you say, oh, do you have anxiety, if you experience anxiety, if you experience OCD, whatever it is.

32:17Yeah, I had this before nothing. There was nothing. It's crazy how much has changed in such a short period of time. But that's because of social media as well, I think. Yeah, no, 100%. Okay, so you go to University of Kent. I did, yeah. Okay, you hated it. Yeah. You really hated it. Where did you go? Leeds University, tutu for theatre and performance. Boom. Next question. A tutu? Yeah, I got a tutu. Congratulations. I wore a tutu.

32:49I went to Leeds University. This is no word of a lie. Again, I've told the story, but I failed my A-levels. I didn't fail them I got BCD Me too You did? Yes, I've never said that online before because it's like embarrassing but yeah, BCD Well, let's clip this up You got BCD? I knew we were connected I knew it I like it a broad spectrum Yeah, I got BCD same as you and my UCAD I had to get AAA to go to Leeds Me too Yeah For Leeds too They didn't let me in Why did they let you in? Hear this You ready for this? Yes Because I'm a man No I'm joking. Okay. The reason that... I kid you, this is what I did, right?

33:33Because I have always believed that you should never take no for an answer. So if someone says no to you, you should never... You should be like, well, why? Why is it a no? Especially when women say it. Especially, okay. Okay, when women say... You should definitely take no for an answer in those cases. When it comes to your own education or peers to you who are saying like, oh, no, you can't go and get that job or you can't go and talk to that person because they're older. Always that kind of those situations. No, in other situations, definitely listen to. But in those situations, I never did.

34:09And I got told no to go to Leeds University. And I was like, well, why? Why? Why can't I go? Because I'm a name on just an exam. Like, I don't get I'm not good at exams. I get nervous in them, all this kind of stuff. I got on a train by myself, went to Leeds University. Okay. I went and knocked on the drama department door and the guy opened it and I said, hi there, my name is Jamie Lang. I applied to go here. I failed my A-levels because I'm just not a good student. I did really badly in the tests and things like that and I would really like to come here. I love it here. This is where I want to come and I promise you I'll be a great student.

34:43And this gentleman very kindly took me around the drama department and he explained, he said, look, I just, you know, your UCAS says it's, it's, it's a computer thing. They say you can't come, but I admire your courage. I admire the fact that you've, you, you've come up here. I was 18 years old, right? Got on the train, went, but I never told anyone. Um, two weeks later, checked on my UCAS and I had an unconditional offer to Leeds. Weird. And I pretty damn sure it's because I just went up there and became a person. Right. Rather than just a name on a list, right? Okay. No, no, no, no, no, no. I actually sort of pushed my way into it.

35:19And I think that, I think that's a kind of good thing to do with people. I think people always just take no for an answer when it's a job. If someone gets to, Oh, we don't want you, your application gets moved or whatever it is. I always think you should try and push it as much as possible. This is like that, that TikTok joke. Like what would happen if you just called Taylor up? What's this one? Have you seen that? It's like this mom, is it Taylor or Harry she's talking about? Taylor Swift. Yeah. Okay. And the girl's like a fan of Taylor Swift or Harry Styles. And the mom's like, why don't you just call them?

35:50Call them up. Ask if you can come to their concert. And it's like how, like, love you. Older people. I can't wait. They always say like, just go to his office and ask for a job. Yes. But it actually kind of works because no one does it. So it's like you actually, it does make you unique. So you fell to Leeds, shame. Didn't make it, but you went to university. You didn't like it. you spend a lot of time in your car oh yeah okay tell me what what's happening in the car everything okay give it to me like what I just well okay I didn't spend that much time in it till like my last year because like that was that was when I just couldn't do it anymore so I moved in with this family like a mother a father and a child and me and I was in their spare room 200 pounds a month in rent and they cooked me dinner every night and they had two dogs and a horse I miss this phase of my life so much.

36:47This like detached home in Kent. Okay. Lovely house, massive garden, everything you could possibly, my bed was electric. I could go up and down. I had a bigger bedroom than I have now and a little sister. It was so good. It was so good. And a cat. So many questions. Are you, blink if you're not okay. Who was this family that took you in oh my god i don't know where did you find this i don't remember like i i have no idea and they like interviewed me i like went over for a dinner to like i don't know test if i was crazy and they say served me lasagna it was great this is very wholesome it was amazing and then they let me move in like a week later and i'm still in touch i speak to them all the time the kid was 13 when i moved in she's like what 16 now so very close to her right like a little sister in a way Yeah, I love her so much.

37:40And she FaceTimes me all the time. I sometimes don't answer because she's going to watch this and she's going to send it to me and she's going to say, you never pick up my calls. It's okay. I do ignore half of her calls. You probably ignore a lot of people. It's fine. That's true. I do. I'm just rude. Life is busy. No, but it's okay. But like, I want to, that's quite a unique, normally when you go to university, you sort of integrate yourself with like your peers or people. Well, I did for three and a half years. And then I couldn't stomach it anymore. Fuck this. So you went and lived on a farm.

38:15Yeah. And that's where the car comes in. Because I was suddenly driving like half an hour to university every day because they lived in the middle of nowhere. And so by the time I would get there and I would find parking, which was incredibly rare, I would just think, fuck it. And then I would just dial in on my laptop from my car because it was much more comfortable. but I felt like I'd done my piece in going to university. And then I was like, well, I'm going to get attendance whether or not I'm on my laptop, but it's just not, I'm on the grounds. And so I'll just sit here and listen for my computer.

38:46And so I would just sit in my car and I would be in there for like, I don't know, 10 hours at a time. What? Like writing essays. I loved it. It was warm. I could control the temperature. Yeah. Music. Yeah. And I had just got it. It was my Astra. And I thought it was the coolest car ever. Like I think people think I'm joking when I say I love that car. I love that car. Like I slept in it one night because I was like, I just don't want to get out. And the seat was broken. So it went the whole way back if you wanted it to. So this is where it all started. Yeah. Because I like when you're living in a family house, you kind of need your own space sometimes.

39:23Because I love them. They took me in like they actually did. But also like they were like a family with a routine. So I had to live by that because I was in their house under their roof. So it was kind of nice just to be in my car and be able to do whatever I wanted at any hour that I wanted and play my music out loud. You'd like this, you know, you'd like this alone time. Yes. Do you not? No. I get energy being around people. Okay. Me too. Yeah. I don't, being alone, I think I think too much. you can combat that the ipad the tv the phone if that's just distraction yeah all right okay distraction is beautiful yeah all on full volume and then you just sit there

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42:17can do that one thing for us, it would be incredible. Thank you so much. Okay, let's get back to it. You spoke about that you wanted a sign. Oh yeah. And can you tell the story? You wanted to see a blue face. Yes. So can you tell the story? Okay. So I was still like at university and I was like, maybe like three TikToks in, like I posted three videos ever online. And so I was still planning to like go about my life as normal like do a master's and get an education whatever and I asked the universe for a sign I said I want to see a blue smiley face if I'm like if I'm gonna be okay because my life was kind of up in the air at the time and I was really into manifestation at the time but I didn't see one I say for like six months and I kind of forgot I'd even asked and then one day were you looking for it no I yeah like like I remembered frequently enough that I had asked.

43:14And I would often see things that were nearly it, but weren't it like a green smiley face, you know what I mean? Or like a blue something, but it would never be a blue smiley face. And then one day I was walking around Oxford street and this was right when TikTok started to become like something I actually did. So like I had been in London for something related to it. Probably one of the first times ever that I had like gone out, maybe I'd met someone, I don't know. And there was this girl crying on a bench, smoking a cigarette. And I like looked at her, like I gawk, like I really have a gawking issue.

43:51I was like this. And I walked past just like staring at her and she stared back at me. And then later on I got a DM and it was like, did you walk past me on Oxford street earlier? And I realized it was her. And it was the first time anyone had ever messaged me from knowing who I was online and seeing me in real life. if it was the first time anyone had recognized me from like the internet. And so I responded because I was like, oh, that's so cool. And I was like, yeah, like I was on Oxford Street earlier and I knew that I had seen her. And then she ended up inviting me to a dinner party she was having that night.

44:23And so I said I was going to try and go, but I actually had a date that night. So I was like, I'll see if I can make it. I didn't end up going. Then I checked the bio, like her Instagram bio, she had a link in it and I wanted to see like what she was doing so i click it and the logo is this big it's like a the ocean part of the like a world map yeah and it had a big smiley face on it so it's blue it was like a world map the ocean part so it's blue mostly with a big smiley face on it and i was like oh it's so freaky and that is like she's like when i'm i was with her last night like i this girl became the most important thing to me.

45:01Really? Yes. I cannot tell you how much I adore her. And then from that day, I guess my life kind of went in the direction that it's gone in, whatever. That was kind of the start, I would say. And we actually didn't become friends for like a year after that initial meeting. We would occasionally message on Instagram. Nothing really ever came of it. She would always invite me to these dinner parties and I would never go because I was kind of shy. I was like, I don't know you. I don't know your friends. And then I needed help finding a flat and she offered to help me. And, um, it's quite familiar, no?

45:37The flat thing? No, just in general, right? Like that's, you know, that's quite, it's quite a, it's like, it's being, one would, could argue that it's my overly familiar in some ways. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Um, but we ended up talking about like real estate in London because she's weirdly well versed in it and um from that conversation that was the first real conversation we'd ever had we got on so well like so well and we ended up getting dinner in new york because that's where we were that was the first time we ever properly met and i literally have not left her side since like i choose where i live in the world based on where she is so i can't i can't function without you i love her isn't that wild that that happened yeah that you had this sign and then you meet this person and this person guides you through life in certain ways.

46:29And then after hearing that, I honestly, I kid you not, I was like, okay, fine. Madeline said this, I'm going to ask for a sign. This is no way to the light. I swear to God, I'd never done it in my life. And I was going through and I encourage people to do the same thing. It's a really good way. And whether you believe in this stuff or not, who knows, right? But I think I'm pretty spiritual at times and I like all these things. I asked for a sign. I was going through a tricky period. And I said, I just want to have a sign. Just give me a sign. And the sign is I want to bump into a long lost friend.

46:57Random. I want to bump into a long lost friend. Same like you. I had moments where I was like, oh, is that the bumping? That the bumping? Like I connected with a guy on LinkedIn that I hadn't, but I connected with him. I was like really trying to find this sign. Right. And I had forgotten about it. And I was walking down the street in Notting Hill in London and I was, I totally forgotten this whole thing. And then this guy was walking towards me and I bumped into him. His name's Edmund. And I hadn't seen him since I was a kid. Right. And like we were such close friends and he was like, Hey man, how are you doing?

47:31And I was like, I called him Mundi. I was like, Mundi, how are you, man? Haven't seen you yet. He's like, yeah, so good. I just moved around the corner. Let's go and get a beer. And I was like, dude, I would love that. A hundred percent. Walked off with Sophie and it suddenly clicked. I was like, that was it that's the long lost friend things are great yeah i'm happy i married you so far we're meant to be together that's so funny do you do that a lot do you ask the universe for things not anymore why where did you stop um because i just trust it i at the time i didn't like have much evidence to be like no whatever happens is right i was like i think my life might be falling apart i need a sign like i didn't trust it yet and then i think now it's like i can look back and be like every hardship was had a reason and like something came out of it so now i'm like i don't feel like i need a sign because i'm like i just trust it like if it's fucking my life up fine it's for a reason like i just kind of believe everything's going to be okay without needing like an actual sign because i'm like i have all this evidence to back it up i feel like that's my sign.

48:41Okay. You're in your car, cart forward. And this whole new app, TikTok starts kicking off. Right. And it used to be musically. Yeah. Then it became TikTok. Um, and people are doing dances and things like this on it. And people are just following trends and you decide to pick up, pick it up and just start talking into it. What was the first time you started doing TikTok? What was it? Um, it was a video I was talking about how I had taken a scandalous picture at the Queen's Palace, the Royal Palace in, in, what's that place called? Not Windsor. Starts with a W. uh windsor um starts with a w maybe not how old are we four starts with an a starts with a w is that a w yeah w w madly you can't say w i can't

49:56westminster abbey windsor um okay one of the palaces anyway yeah not the big one so i had like this, like I'm like 14 here, right. I'd gone off taking a picture of my tits in the bathroom and I found it funny. And I always kept that one to myself. Cause I was like, no one can really know I did that. Like my mom was, this is when my mom's getting her MBA, mind you, it's a big day. And I'm in the bathroom taking pictures of my tits. I'm also violently underage. And then that was like, I was skip. I don't know. How old was I when I started Tik TOK? 21. Yeah. And, um, had a crush on this girl. She did Tik TOK, but she only replied to people with a following.

50:31So I was like, okay have to get a following so she will know who I am and will fall in love with me so I was just like on my bedroom floor had tonsillitis I'm pretty sure my flatmates had gone out to play in the snow without me and I thought this is my time I will thirst trap I tried that but I never posted it because I was like it's not really giving what I want it to give and then I remembered this story so I just set up my phone and told this story instead because I was like I need to post something on this app don't know why i thought that would like work to like woo her but i posted this story time i think it maybe got like 300 000 views but i had no followers so i was like shit the first one uh-huh i had maybe a few videos up before i think one where i was like joking around with my friend from like a year prior and then one i had made some kind of stupid outfit video like a you know like an outfit check video to like a sound isn't it funny how we try and impress people so sad when you like when you're in it you think it's fine and then you look back and you're like oh god can i maybe this is too personal feel free not to answer when when did you know that you fancied girls?

51:53Ooh. Probably I was young. Really? Yeah. I had a big crush on this girl in my class. I didn't really know I was a crush. I just liked her. And I thought about her all the time. And then I remember I made this friend in like year three. So how old are you in year three? Like seven? Yeah. And she told me what lesbians were because we'd gone down to brighton with her mom for work we saw some girls kissing and i said uh because i thought they were mom and daughter yeah because that was my only point of reference for women kissing so i was like that's weird and i got told off for it and she said they're lesbians and i was like what the fuck is a lesbian and then i knew from that day forth i was okay you can kiss girls I want to do that so and then I just kind of rolled with it from there I was in denial but I knew like I didn't like it but I was like fully aware really yeah and you kept us you kept it a secret for a long time yeah why because you were nervous you you it's funny now how we like it's so different it's so different now and it's I fully it's hard to acknowledge which, especially for like younger people, how different it is.

53:13Cause it's like hard to even imagine that so much could change in 10 years. But you couldn't say you were gay. No way. Okay, first of all, in primary school, no one was even talking about their sexuality. Like that wasn't even a thing. But even in secondary school, like you, no way. No, you, no. No one did it. the first time I ever think I saw anyone in my year group talk about it was sick form there was there was a gay guy who was pretty camp in my year the whole way through that was somehow more okay than a girl doing it though really he was he was quite widely accepted I think I mean I don't know maybe he would say otherwise but i feel like it was uh he really owned it he was very like flamboyant and people kind of liked it but i think if if a normal kind of heterosexual looking girl came out and said that she liked girls it would have been an issue like the p changing rooms you wouldn't have stood a chance because people don't like it is there any lesbians in here everyone would scream it before getting changed if there's any lesbians close their eyes that every p lesson i fucking hated pee because I always felt so uncomfortable.

54:30And you know what? I remember I'm rambling, but I went to South Africa. Keep rambling. It's the best. It's the best. I went to South Africa when I was 18 and we were in dormitories and it was like this volunteer project for monkeys and we were in dorms. I was sharing a room with like six other girls and they did it too. There was a girl on site that showed up about two weeks in to us all being there she was gay and they all said i hope she's not in here because she'll watch us getting changed i ended up dating that girl publicly they all knew and i was like i thought you feel fucking stupid loud but yeah i remember thinking that oh god like this still exists i hadn't told them that i like girls because it didn't come up but i was like oh you guys have just said that to me because you don't know that i like girls now you look stupid yeah and now i'm uncomfortable because I don't want to tell you because I think I want to fuck you.

55:24Oh, gross. That's tough, man. Yeah. Figuring out sexuality when we're younger, it's like a, it's a, it's a minefield. I like even, even being, you know, I'm straight and, but like being younger when, you know, I was at an all boys school and figuring out how to like kiss or have sex or it was just a complete minefield in so many ways. Yeah. I mean, it's confusing for straight kids. I think all kids are just confused and scared by it or intrigued by it, but it's not, I can't, like, I don't know any friend with an anecdote of feeling completely at peace and like sure of what sex was and how kissing works.

56:08Do you know what I mean? Like not one person would say that, I don't think. What do you like in relationships? I like someone that's like like makes me laugh I like when it's just like a little bit of a break from the real world I don't enjoy when it's too involved probably not ready for marriage but it's like I prefer the relationships that are like this little secluded thing rather than the ones where I've had where it's like you're in every fucking aspect of my life you're with my friends we go to the same school we work the same job we live together we share an animal it's I couldn't. Not again.

56:44I've like gone backwards in my maturity, I think. When did you have that intense relationship? When I was like 19. Intense? Oh my God, it was the worst. Because it was just too much. So overwhelming. Yeah. I need someone that's so busy. They borderline don't think about me. I love that. Like, like minimal. Like I like when you're together. So it's like you're fully together. like you're you're involved and then you part ways and you go about your life and then you come back together that's what I love to have like actual quality time that's like focused I don't like when it's like a little bit all the time and never fully involved in the queer community it is a limited number of people per square feet right like there's only so many gay girls in one area and so most of you know each other and i this is like a universal experience as far as i'm aware within the queer community is that everyone fucking knows each other and your ex is their ex and you're dating her girlfriend and everything is mixed in and so like when you date someone especially in a small area and like most areas in the uk are relatively small like even the southeast Okay.

57:58It's a web of lesbians and it's the fucking worst thing. And so it's like, you start dating a girl. There's like 17 prying eyes in Bournemouth and Brighton and Eastbourne, just waiting for you to break up, sending suspicious DMs, like preying on your downfall. But it's, they can get to you. That's the difference. It's actually worse. I'm going to counter it, right? Because I can, if I type your name on social media, right? You can see fans are just crazy about what you're doing. That feels to me far more intense than worrying about what's happening in Eastbourne. Somehow it's not. Somehow it's not because I can't explain it to you.

58:45It's just not. Like, it's just so much, it's more far removed. like what are you gonna do fucking dm me go for it i don't care good on you well yeah i'll just turn my phone off like that's the thing i can switch you off and you literally don't know where i live you don't know who i am you don't know anything and you have no connection to me the girls in esports like they know or they have a history with someone that i like or they have a history with someone that my ex-girlfriend was with or maybe they are my cousin like it's everyone knows each and they can get to me like and it's real and every time you break up with someone in the queer community you already know the person they're dating next like you already are mutuals on instagram and you could have seen it coming a mile off every single time and they'll always say no no like i don't like her like i've already dated her twice and like we just don't get on no they're going to date again and it's insane it doesn't stop happening like every time you already knew the girl that they end up with and you can't even predict who it is because there's like 25 options but you already knew her you're already friends with her you've probably been on a date with her we like to end the show with eight questions all right can i just say i don't know what it is but i i've always said this to your manager shelby that i've always had like this protective bubble around isn't that for some reason I don't know why like always you know we don't know each other too well right we've met a few times but always from the outside I'm always like is she okay okay she's all right I don't know why for a weird thing maybe because I sat with you at that dinner for 18 courses I don't know what it is so I'm always I'm always checking in whether that in the least creepy I love it no I I love when you check because you're checking with me too not just for the show just making sure you're okay you know what they call you What is it?

1:00:37I have an instrument, industry mummy. You're my industry daddy. So I'm your daddy? Okay, all right. I've got it. It's usually just industry mummy. I got to that age where I can't say it anymore. It's just weird. Okay. By the way, thank you for coming. This has been so great. Yeah, thanks for having me. Okay, you ready for these eight questions? Mm-hmm. Madeline, okay. What's a saying or phrase that always makes you smile or cheers you up? Oh, fuck. Good start. It could be anything. I know that you like bluey. Yeah. Do you hear the theme tune to that? Does that make you cheer? Oh, yeah, for sure.

1:01:20I think any theme tune would cheer me up. Best compliment anyone's ever given you? I was thinking about this. My friend Julia, she always describes me as gentle. I love that great one what scares you the most about yourself I tried to come up with just one I always think I have a secret gene in me that could mutate and make me go fucking insane and I fear it like I don't take drugs because because they're bad but also like I'm not fucking with my brain like I there's something in there one day it's gonna explode it's gonna go it's gonna go I know because also like there's my family what's it called genealogy is that the right word like there's a lot of crazies in my family like most of them are off the grid insane I'm next because also no one from my mum's kids or like mum's immediate circle has gone insane yet which is worrying do you make me a deal that you won't go and like don't Stay away from like weed and stuff.

1:02:29I always think. Oh, fuck no. Yeah. I have one experience with weed in my life. Yeah. This is how I know I'm so serious about being insane. I climbed out a window naked because I thought my walls were closing in on me in my university halls. And then I paced for about four hours. I called an ambulance on myself. It never came. That's awesome. I sobered up like seven hours later. I had to call and be like, well, don't bother. What from one joint? I had a brownie.

1:03:01so embarrassing and my flatmate out the window thank god i had my blanket around me but nothing underneath and i didn't care because i have to get out i had no time to put my pants on yeah and then i my flatmate was in the kitchen studying late into the night and um he's so sweet he just would never cross his mind that anything was like severely wrong especially like substance related because it's just not in his realm and so So he just thought I was on the phone to my mum for a really long time. And it got to the next morning, he was like, are you okay? You were on the phone for a really long time last night.

1:03:32And I thought, who the fuck was on the phone to? I checked my call, the ambulance.

1:03:39999.

1:03:43Oh my God, that was good. Okay. When was the last time you cried and why? On my way here. I took a picture for you. I watch, I was listening to Sabrina Carpenter's things I wish I said or things I never said. song uh and i was stopped at a traffic light and i saw a little old man feed the pigeons and he was hobbling and he hobbled away and there was like i'm not even a thousand pigeons came down to see him and then he like smiled and he like threw the food loads of food and then he walked off i just cried you empathetic person that's so sweet i don't usually cry at things like that i cry like those things.

1:04:21What's something you can't let go of? Oh, my teddy. My first teddy. I'm kind of scared to talk about him online because I'm paranoid. I think someone's going to try to take him. If they know that's my prized possession they might hurt him or something. But he's this little pink teddy that I got when I was born. What's he called? First teddy. He's called First Teddy? Yeah, because I couldn't speak. So he's got like a bib that says My First Teddy on it. So that's just his name first, Ellie. Do you have a tech? I used to have something called a silky and I used to do something which I used to call lipping.

1:04:54I did that. Do you have a technique with the bit? Do you do something? Do you suck it or anything like that? I used to do that. Lipping. Yeah. No, with silk. Yeah. Me too. Yeah. I used to lip it. I don't know what about lip it. It was called lipping. I would go to the end of it because it was nice and I would do this thing called lipping. Okay. Okay. Lovely. Well, I similar, my mom, like I was fucking up all her blankets with like this, I don't know if they're old but like this silk edging on a blankie exactly same as me so she made me my own one so i could fuck it up i had big and little silky i swear to god i called mine bar i had mine big silky and little silky me too and i used to i like ripped off a bit of the silk so i could wrap it around my finger and like rub it underneath my nose i would do something called lipping yes i know okay you know you got it you got it right that's gross but it must be an anxious thing i i don't know but silk feels nice i try and go back to it's like i don't i'm not really attached to it like I was obsessed no I was like I came with me everywhere but like in adulthood like I don't know where it is right now like it's in my house mine got stolen oh no yeah I like who would do that I don't know some person at my school my boarding school took it I still think my mom organized it to be taken because I was 13 13 year old boy lipping my silky she was like get that away from him that might be what happened good on her what's something you'd be embarrassed for people to know you like or want?

1:06:14Like the bluey thing, but you already told people about that one. I got it here. You said bluey when I'm in hotels. Oh yeah. Oh, because I always, I watch it in hotels. Yeah. Bluey. Oh, I love it. What turns you off? Any form of rudeness or like just egos, I think in general. I'm with you on that completely. 100 % rudeness, ego. Don't like it. What turns you on? Uh, I guess the exact opposite of that. Like just someone that's I hate the word humble, but... Kindness, humble. Yeah, not humble. I know what you mean. I like how people know their power, but... Gentle. Yeah, yeah. Like you are, you're gentle.

1:06:55Oh, thanks. I didn't say that, your friend said that, but I'll say it again, you're gentle. What do you like most about yourself?

1:07:07Yeah, I didn't have an answer to this yesterday and I don't now. That's so sad. You've got to say something. Come on. Okay. You know it's deep in there. Get it out. What do I like most about myself?

1:07:22I think... You think you're a good friend? I can be. Okay. Fuck me. I'm a good driver. Okay, take it. You ready for the bonus one? Uh-huh. I'm switching it up. Oh, God. Quick fire. Favourite swear word? Oh, cunt. Yeah. Yeah. Madeline, you're the greatest. I, you know, I want to ever, people already know you. I want you to check out all your social media. I really do think you're a great role model for young kids. I really do. I just for anyone. I really do. You're awesome. You're amazing. You give me a lot of time and I'll always be that industry daddy, as you said, whenever you need. I appreciate it.

1:08:00Thanks for coming on. Thanks for having me.

1:08:07What do you think? that was great although what? well the iPad wasn't working I communicate with Jamie oh my god I thought you were going to say I was doing something wrong no you were wonderful if anything like very very good and I was like he's not taking any of my notes yeah the iPad was not connecting and I was like he's doing so well but like am I giving terrible notes? but explain that so what do you normally do in the episode? so normally we have a Google sheet up and I'm on my computer and I type into the Google sheet and it pops up on Jamie's iPad So I can say like, oh, can you ask her this?

1:08:39Or like, you know, if there's a question and I like there's a direction, I think it would be fun to go in. And sometimes you, yeah, it helps. And sometimes you already have an idea in your mind. So you don't always take it. So I was doing that and I was thinking, oh, he's just. But I was looking for them. They just didn't come through. I know. I kept seeing you going up and down on it. And I was like, what's he looking for? What's he looking for? So, yeah. But if anything, you did annoyingly well. Perfect. But it's great. You've got quite a big age gap, actually. What is it? Age gap's like 10 years?

1:09:11More. More? She's 23. Oh, my God. And you're 40. No, I'm not 40. 17 years. It's not. It's not. I'm not 40. Oh, my God. It's about a 10 year. Just a bit over. But you did call it the TikTok at one point. But I'll be honest. That's the type of thing I do as well. The TikTok. That's embarrassing. But hey, hey. I love her. She's amazing. She's really fun. She's amazing. and open and just, she's working. She's the greatest. Hey guys, if you want to follow us on social media, you can at Great Company Podcast and send us any messages you want to as well on our Instagram. And also, if you haven't followed this podcast, it means so much to us.

1:09:51You just click the subscribe button wherever you're watching or listening to this. It would be amazing if you could do that because it does so much for us. I cannot tell you, literally so much. Thank you so much for listening. Jemima, you're the best. Thanks, so are you. We'll see you next episode. Do da da da da Do da da da da da da Do da da da da da da Do da da da da da da Do da da da da da Hi,

1:10:21this is Nox from the Popcast with Nox and Jamie. And maybe like us at the Popcast, you also know people who have been smokers or vapers. And Zen is the one product it seems like everyone is talking about. Because there are many good reasons to make a change to Zen nicotine pouches. Reasons like Zen nicotine pouches are still America's number one choice for smoke-free, hands-free nicotine satisfaction. And you can choose between 10 varieties, each variety available in either 3 or 6 milligrams. Check out zen.com slash find to find Zen at a store near you. Warning, this product contains nicotine.

1:10:52Nicotine is an addictive chemical. They say if you want to go fast, go alone. But if you want to go far, go together. At Amika Insurance, we know what matters most to you. And we work even harder to protect it, together. As a mutual insurance company, we're built for our customers and prioritize your needs. Amika. Empathy is our best policy. Call 877-41-AMIKA and get a quote today. Hello everyone, we're Jamie and Sophie. You may remember us from nearlyweds and then newlyweds. But now, guys, things are about to get even wilder as we take on our biggest adventure yet, becoming parents. Yeah, that's right.

1:11:39Newlyweds is now Nearly Parents, and we're bringing you the same honest, heartwarming takes on our journey to parenthood, I guess. Join us as we find out what it really means to become a family while trying not to kill each other. Get ready for Nearly Parents, your favourite new podcast.