ROBIN SHARMA: 90% OF YOUR HAPPINESS COMES FROM THE PARTNER YOU CHOOSE

0:00Does it ever feel like you're a marketing professional just speaking into the void? But with LinkedIn ads, you can know you're reaching the right decision makers, a network of 130 million of them, in fact. You can even target buyers by job title, industry, company, seniority, skills, and did I say job title? See how you can avoid the void and reach the right buyers with LinkedIn ads. Spend$250 on your first campaign and get a free$250 credit for the next one. Get started at linkedin.com slash campaign. Terms and conditions apply. If you're a smoker or vapor ready to make a change, you really only need one good reason.

0:35But with Zinn Nicotine Pouches, you'll discover many good reasons. Zinn is America's number one nicotine pouch brand. Plus, Zinn offers a robust rewards program. There are lots of options when it comes to nicotine satisfaction. But there's only one Zinn. Check out Zinn.com slash find to find Zinn at a store near you. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Hello, I'm Katherine Ryan, and this is Write Me Dirty, the podcast where two comedians write steamy, ridiculous erotica about each other. I give them a bizarre prompt, think, apocalypse must include a zombie, and they read their spicy stories aloud while I judge them on sexiness, funniness, and sheer chaos.

1:19It's hilarious, awkward, and occasionally kinda hot. Write Write me dirty. Thursdays just got thirstier. Write me dirty.

1:34Hello everyone, my name is Jamie Lang and this is Great Company.

1:43Well, hello, good afternoon, good morning, good evening, Jemima. And hello to you, Jamie Lang, the presenter. I'm going to introduce you. This is Jamie. Yeah, I'm the host of Great Company. What did I just say I was about to do? I'm going to introduce you. Okay, go. This is Jamie. He's got blonde hair and he is the producer. That was awful. That's the worst way ever. Just introduce me in the worst way ever. He's got blonde hair. He's the producer of the show. He's the presenter of Great Company. Now you do me. Okay, this is wonderful Jemima, who is the producer of Great Company and the person...

2:23My hair colour is? Your hair colour is brown. Yes. And Jemima helps edit, produces, researches this whole show with me. So welcome everybody to the show. Very excited today. So I'm not a great reader of books. No. Never have been. If you listen to the episode of Great Company with Nicole Vignola, ADHD expert, go and listen to that one because you understand that I occasionally, occasionally I do suffer with ADHD, suffer. I have an ADHD brain. I'm very proud of it. I go all over the place in different ways, but also it makes me not able to read that much because I get distracted. Robin Sharma, who is coming on the podcast today, he wrote a book called The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari.

3:06That book spoke to me. It was one of these books I couldn't put down that happens very rarely to me. Not that that's amazing thing, but it just does from my own personal experience. It's amazing that I find a book that I can't not put down. And I messaged him, asking him to come on the podcast. Never thought he would reply. He is a multi award selling, million selling author, flies around the world. He's a life coach to so many amazing people. He responded to me. And he is now coming on the podcast. Tell me about the monk who sold his Ferrari. How did it speak to you? Well, The Monkey Solders Ferrari is about a guy who is living a life of riches.

3:46He's a lawyer and he is probably burnt out. He's working every day, earning a lot of money. And he goes and meets one of his old colleagues who was incredibly successful, but also hardworking and never wasn't working. And his colleague allows him to realise what's important in life. And he has another book called The 5am Club, which is amazing. I haven't read, but I'm about to read it on holiday. and he's also got another book called The Wealth Money Come By. And he's got other things. He's done some incredible things. He's sold millions of copies. And really, if I was you today, and I don't want to tell you what to do, but I would almost grab like a pad or a pen or get on your phone or be by your computer and I would almost just jot some things down that he says because I imagine today is going to be incredible.

4:29I think it's really important. I mean, to be the best version of yourself. Yeah. And I think it's very hard to be the best version of yourself because there are distractions and life and everything gets in the way. And I'm really in a moment where I'm trying to do that in terms of kindness and empathy and self, like, you know, loving ourselves. And I hope for you today that's going to happen. I think without going too deep that that's the meaning of life. And to be, there's an amazing quote in Meet Joe Black, of all things, where Auntie Hopkins gets up and says, I'm blessed because I wake up every morning and realise I don't want any more.

5:02And it's an amazing thing because I think that's what you want to get to. You want to feel content. And I want to ask about all these sorts of things. I think it's going to be a great episode. Also, he's Canadian. Nice to have a transatlantic accent on there. International, baby. Are you ready for this? I'm really excited. Pen and paper ready. Ladies and gentlemen, please enjoy the episode of Great Company with Robin Sharma. Hello, I'm Robin Sharma. And I am Great Company. Robin, firstly, I am so excited to be sitting here. And you probably hear this from a lot of different people, but your book, The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, sits on my bedside table every single night.

5:43I've read it a couple of times. So you pretty much go to sleep with me every single night. And I slid into your DMs and you had no idea who I was, but I've never in my life had the kindest reply. You sent me a voice note and you said, Jamie, thank you for reaching out. I am. You were in Dubai, I think, at the time. You were doing a conference there. You said, look, we'll try and connect at some point. And if we do, it'd be great. And if we don't, I wish you good luck. You've never met me. I could be a sociopath. I could be a murderer. I could be anything, but you still sent me that. And that leaves a mark on an individual.

6:22And I think that initial connection is so important. We talked about that earlier when you were interviewed by someone and you, before you chatted to them, this is 20 years ago, they were looking at their phone. They were on that. And that was 20 years ago, but you remember it. I still remember. We often remember things like that. Two things come to mind, Jamie. When I was, I don't know, seven years old, I grew up in Canada and there was a children's show called Mr. Dress Up. And Mr. Dress Up was this kind of like Mr. Rogers. I don't know if you've ever seen that show. And he had these puppets, Finnegan and Casey.

6:57And I was a little kid and I just loved the show. So I decided to write a thank you letter to Mr. Dress Up. So I scrawled it out on a piece of paper. My mom put it in an envelope and we sent it off to Mr. Dress Up Studio. That was it. I never thought I'd receive anything back. A week later, I received a postcard with Mr. Dress Up, Casey and Finnegan. And a handwritten note on the back from Ernie Combs, who was the actor. So all these years later, I still remember Mr. Dressup's letter. So those acts of humanity in a world crying for real connection, not digital connection, is powerful. Second anecdote.

7:49Pau Gasol, he was the center of the Los Angeles Lakers. He came to one of my live events. So I got to know him over the weekend and I drove him to the airport. Once we got to, I don't know how tall he is. He's got to be 6 '9", 6 '10". And as we walked through the airport, everyone knew who he was. Kids came to him. He shot pictures. Mothers came to him. He gave them a hug. Fathers came to him. He gave them a fist bump. As I saw this, I just watched him. We got to the gate. I said, Pow, you're a big celebrity. Center for the LA Lakers. You had time for everyone. And he shared something with me I've never forgotten.

8:37He said, it takes so little to make someone happy. It takes so little to make someone happy. And it might sound like a platitude, but I think in this world right now where people so many people are lonely we're digital digitally connected we're always online we have a thousand digital friends many of us don't have three friends that would fly on a plane to bail us out of a hard situation in another country at 3 a.m if we were in trouble we're living in this lonely world and and it's you're so right ron is because we're so connected that we've become disconnected you know your your book the wealth money can't buy is just fascinating in so many ways.

9:21We are driven for some reason, especially because of social media and for when we're young, that wealth equals success. And that if we become wealthy, we're going to be happy and all our dreams come true. We have dreams of winning the lottery and what we'll do with the money. That's what we sit on our college steps talking with our friends about. We look on social media and see musicians, artists, comedians, actors, driving Lamborghinis or living in their South of France homes. That's what you want. But your whole philosophy is saying that doesn't make you actually happy. But one would argue potentially is that because you have experienced that side.

10:02You are able to, I'm assuming, pay your rent or pay your mortgage or look after your kids. And so someone would say that, hang on a second, And how can you show that money doesn't bring happiness? I'm not saying money is not important. As a matter of fact, the eight forms of wealth that the book is based around, the fifth form of wealth is money. We all need money to pay the rent. We need money to put food on the family table. Money allows us not to be backed into a corner to make choices we don't want to make. Money allows us to do nice things for the people we love. Money allows us to be generous to people in need.

10:44So it's one of the eight forms of wealth. It's something, but it's not everything. So that's one thing I wanted to say. Secondly, if I think about one of the happiest people I've ever met, it was my ski instructor. I mean, he was out in the mountains. He was teaching a skill that he loved. He had a family who adored him. He would barbecue every night and he loved what he did. And one day as we were going up the chairlift, We'd always have the best conversations. He said something to me. He said, Robin, us ski instructors aren't rich, but we have rich lives. So the wealth money can't buy is how do you live your richest life?

11:21And what I'm really trying to say is money and nice things, there's nothing wrong with them. Get them, but do not make them your gods. Make them your servants. Do not define yourself by your money. Oh, look, here's my car collection. Oh, here's how much money I have. I guess that fills the holes inside of me. A lot of us have these holes, if not all of us. And many of us haven't done the work to see the holes. So we're unconsciously striving and hustling and grinding, climbing a mountain that society has climbed. It says, climb this and you'll be happy and successful. Only to realize at the top of that mountain, we climbed the wrong mountain.

12:06Socrates says there are two levels of happiness. the lower level and the high level. The lower level is richness, power, fame, all the things that you think you want to achieve. And when you reach that mountain, you're actually not that happy. And the other one is loyalty, love, family, trust, empathy, friendship, all those different things. And what you're saying is totally right is that it's a mixture between all these combinations of things. But if you make success in terms of financial gain, your main focus, you're never going to be happy. It becomes a drug of choice. Do you think it becomes an addiction?

12:39It becomes an addiction. It becomes how you measure your success in the world. I've mentored these billionaires for years. And they're not happy. Some of them are, most of them are not. In the book I talk about, there's one chapter called the multi-billionaire in the very empty mansion. So there was this celebrity financial titan. he reached out to my team. He wanted me to mentor him. He was having some struggles. We considered it. I decided to do it. Went to the city, foreign country, showed up in this neighborhood full of embassies and all these massive houses. And I pulled up, Jamie, to this house bigger than a house I've ever seen.

13:22It was exquisite. Walked inside. I walked past his art collection, walked past his car collection, big glass around it. And I walked into this room and there he was, the celebrated financial titan. And we talked for about two hours and he told me about his exploits and his victories and his difficulties. And then he told me about his yachts and his jets. And I go, oh, this is all interesting. You know, who do you share it with? Long pause. and the answer was i don't have anyone to share it with so some of these billionaires are happy most are not many say i don't know my 20 year old kids anymore some of them develop illnesses along the way i'm sure you've heard those stories so there's nothing wrong with making money but don't lose your family along the way don't lose your health along the way one of the forms of wealth is there's craft, there's family, there's growth.

14:21We can get into those, but one of them is service. And so if you are building a great company, as you're doing, it seems, well, then money, I believe, is going to be your byproduct. Completed it. You know, your story is fascinating because I know, and you've probably, you've spoken about this before, but you're beginning, you published your own books. That is what, you know, your mom was helping you edit the books. Your dad was helping you sell them. You took huge risks at the beginning, buying the stock and just putting them in bookshops, hoping people would like them. Just in the aid of just helping individuals.

15:00Your whole life is sort of served to sort of helping other people. There must be a point in your life where you suddenly went, yeah, this is what I want to do. When was that point when you were like, this is the path that I want to take? There wasn't any aha moment, really. It was more finding my purpose through a thousand different steps. Yes, I self-published my first book. I was a litigation lawyer at the time. I was very empty. Again, I followed the definition of success that the world had sold to me. Be a lawyer, you'll wake up happy. But you're young. I was young, but I made a lot of money and I had a nice car and I had a beautiful house and I woke up every morning.

15:45I looked in the bathroom mirror and I didn't like the person looking back at me. And so success without joy is fool's gold. And so I started an odyssey of sorts and I started trying different modalities, whether it was meditation or working with healers or reading different books or conversations with elders. And I made a significant transformation in my happiness and my wellness and my serenity and my energy. And I decided to write it down. So I wrote this book called The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, which you very generously mentioned at the beginning of the show. and I self-published it. I went to a 24-hour copy shop and I self-published this book.

16:29My first seminar was 23 people. 21 of those people were my family members. So I got some good support early on and I got it in this local bookstore. I have to tell you this, there was this one bookstore in my neighborhood where I, just from the beginning, I was on the bestseller list. and I went, wow, like this book is going to be fire. I'm always number five out of the top 10 in my own neighborhood. This is incredible. And the books were on consignment. I started off just so, so simply. And I bring another five books. They wouldn't pay for them. They'd go on consignment. I come back a week later, they go, Robin, they're sold that this is, you know, you're onto something here.

17:08And about two years ago, my dad said, you know, those books in the bookstore? I go, yeah, Yeah, he goes, I was the one buying them. So I went, Dad, that's very loving, but I don't know if I needed to hear that. Why did he tell me that? Don't tell me that. You just trashed my dreams. Yeah, and then he said, you know all those other millions of books? I bought those. I bought those. You know all these people? They're all actors. Exactly. You know you? I'm an actor. You know you, Robin? I've got to tell you, you're AI. No.

17:44that night but that's true that naivety you you kind of want to keep that naivety i i it was part of the romance yeah yeah yeah but anyway so i started from these hilarious very humble beginnings and then you mentioned a heart of service you know i could get into the day my life changed people say oh my life changed i i'd never experienced a day when my life changed until I stepped in Nelson Mandela's prison cell about six or seven years ago on Robben Island. And I know we don't have time for it, but basically my life changed that day when I saw how he was treated, when I saw the limestone quarry where for seven years he did backbreaking labor, the sunlight which radiated off the stone damaged his eyes, the dust from the limestone work damaged his lungs.

18:39I saw where the propaganda office where they would redact letters from Winnie. So he was psychologically tortured because he wouldn't have any connection with his family. He actually said his greatest regret in all those years of confinement, 27 years altogether, was they wouldn't let him out of prison to attend the funeral of his eldest son who was killed in a car accident. I saw the courtyard, Jamie, where he would tend to a simple tomato plant, but he would also, under the tomato plant, hide his autobiography, Long Walk to Freedom. And then I was led up by the guide to his room. It was about the size of this area here.

19:2418 years in that much space. There wasn't even a bed. and yet when he was freed from prison to become the president of South Africa, he invited the prosecutor who wanted the death sentence for him to dinner and he invited the jailer who kept him in prison to sit in the front row of his inauguration. And he was asked why and he said, because if I didn't, I'd still be in prison. Here's my point. You talk about service. I asked the guide who was walking me around, did you know Nelson Mandela? And he said, yes. He said, I was an ANC prisoner. I knew him for seven years. And I said, of course, what was he like?

20:09And he said, oh, that man was a humble servant. So that day was one of the days that really reinforced that a great leader, and I think great human being is someone who, it doesn't mean you can't have a beautiful house. It doesn't mean you can't have a nice watch if that matters to you. It doesn't mean you can't make money. But one of the forms of wealth that I talk about in the Wealth Money Can't Buy is service. And if you can find it in yourself to go through life and live for some cause that's larger than yourself, you're going to find a richness and a happiness that money won't be able to put a price tag on.

20:51Nelson Mandela said an amazing thing, which is he talks about forgiveness, right? And he says, seeking revenge is like drinking a poison and wanting another person to die. Isn't that great? Seeking revenge is like drinking a poison and wanting the other person to die. It only kills yourself. It only hurts yourself. And it's so true, right? That in life, when we're hurt by maybe a relationship or maybe by a boss or maybe by a friend and we're double crossed and we're so angry about it and we want them to suffer. But actually, if you seek revenge or you want them to suffer, it only hurts you. And you have to forgive or you have to let it go or you have to move on.

21:32I have a German partner who always says, never leave sand in the machine. It's a German saying, which is a great saying, which is basically just let it go. If you leave sand in the machine, it's going to ruin the machine. I think there's a few replies I'd have to that if I may, Jamie. I don't subscribe to revenge. You mentioned a great quote. Confucius said, before you go off to seek revenge, it's best to dig two graves. To your point. That was better. That was better. No, I think yours was better. No, I think yours was better, but I wanted to contribute too. So there is in the book the third form of wealth, which is family.

22:19It's a form of wealth. It's a form of wealth. First of all, I know a lot of entrepreneurs follow you. If you don't have a strong home life, what's your creativity like? What's your energy like? What's your productivity like? What's your presence with your customers, with your team like? You're checked out because you've got drama at home. and we can get into some of the chapters like the 10 000 dinners chapter which is interesting or your mate is 90 of your joy this is the one that i want to get into this is huge this i think it is huge because can you say that one more time you believe that 90 of your joy comes from the partner that you choose oh oh yes and i would also say as a bonus point a red flag is a red flag and we can lose the best years of our life hoping it's green.

23:08And I think you know what I mean by that. Yeah. So just on this forgiveness point though, because it's so important and I don't think it's talked enough in creative, productive, entrepreneurial, mainstream circles. But if you haven't forgiven someone, then you're going to become a resentment collector. If you haven't forgiven someone, it's metaphorically like you're carrying that person through life with you on your back. So forgiveness doesn't mean condoning. Forgiveness doesn't mean you don't hold someone accountable. Forgiveness is a gift that you give yourself so you can move on with life.

23:44And forgiveness comes from understanding that the person who hurt you behave the way that they did because that's the level of consciousness they're at. And as Maya Angelou, the great African-American poet said, if they knew better, they would do better. So that's one way. Second offering I have is let's not like the sand in the machine. So let it go. I think that's valuable. Having said that, I think if you just go, oh, that person broke my heart, that person betrayed me, that business partner stole from me, and you just go, let it go, then you're going to suffer from toxic optimism. Which is what?

24:29Well, toxic optimism is you've broken your heart. You've just experienced a trauma, micro or macro. And you go, oh, I'm going to affirm my way and positive think my way into everything is great. That's denial. It's so unhealthy. You swallow the anger. You swallow the shame. You swallow the disappointment. You swallow the sadness. And as Carl Jung, the preeminent psychologist said, unprocessed through emotions come back to haunt you in unseen ways. And so toxic behavior at the workplace, road rage, look at the planet now, brothers and sisters killing each other. A lot of that is happening because we're not taught how to process through those emotions I talked about.

25:16And we go into a world of toxic optimism, be happy, be happy, be happy. So we're carrying what I call in my methodology, this field of hurt. We don't know how to process and metabolize the feelings through the tools I talk about in the book, for example, MVP, meditation, visualization, and prayer. Even just writing about feelings as a way to process through them. So we pick up all this baggage and we wonder why we don't have the energy we want. We wonder why, as you mentioned, we don't connect with people. We wonder why we don't have intimacy with our creativity. We wonder why we're addicted to drugs or scrolling or worrying or complaining.

25:59Often it's because we have all this pain inside of us and we're looking for escape routes to distract us. I guess what I'm suggesting is very few of us are good at sitting alone with ourselves. You talk about great company. What is the most important company in the world? I don't think it's the company of others. I think it's the company with ourselves. That primary relationship with yourself determines your relationship with your family, friends, money, work, strangers on the streets. It's so true because I remember someone telling me that anger that you don't release will turn into depression if you keep it all inside you.

26:45And I think you're right. I think that's what's happening in the world because that's why. And it's so true road rage. You see it, right? When someone gets cross at, I don't know, your food arrives late because you've ordered it home and someone gets so angry, holding something because you're feeling like you can release it in that position because it's minor. Before we get into the 90%, your partner is 90 % of your happiness, which I'm just fascinated by. Have you ever had to forgive someone? Of course. If you're alive, you've been hurt. I could get into the value of suffering. Yeah, just briefly tell me.

27:29Well, the value of suffering is you grow the most from your most painful experiences if you exploit them for your growth. How do you learn intimacy with your bravery? How do you get to know wisdom? How do you get to know wisdom? How do you become more sensitive to life? How do you become more creative? You suffer. I was actually on an airplane with an artist. And I said, like, what's the secret to your amazing art? And he said, I pick partners who break my heart. And I said, why? And he goes, because that's when I do my best art. So the beauty of suffering or the value of suffering is, first of all, it introduces you to how strong you are.

28:13Secondly, it teaches you wisdom. It teaches you the great virtues, patience, forgiveness, honesty, authenticity. That all comes when we get our hearts broken. And yes, I've had to forgive a number of people so I don't carry them through life on my back. But again, that was a great, it was hard when I went through it and it was necessary and it served me so well now that I look back at it. It's the old idea, a bad day for the ego is a great day for the soul. That's amazing. It's true. We have to suffer in order to grow.

28:53The market's uncertain. Revenue's tied and hiring on hold. That's why results-driven companies are using Upwork to keep work moving. Go to Upwork.com today and start hiring proven freelance talent fast. No bulky overhead. No rigid long-term contracts. Just the right expert, right when you need them. Work smarter and faster with Upwork. Go to Upwork.com now and find your freelance expert. That's U-P-W-O-R-K.com. Post a job for free and get started today. If you're a smoker or vapor ready to make a change, you really only need one good reason. But with Zinn Nicotine Pouches, you'll discover many good reasons.

29:33Zinn is America's number one nicotine pouch brand. Plus, Zinn offers a robust rewards program. There are lots of options when it comes to nicotine satisfaction, but there's only one Zin. Check out Zin.com slash find to find Zin at a store near you. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Hello everyone, we're Jamie and Sophie. You may remember us from Nearlyweds and then Newlyweds. But now guys, things are about to get even wilder as we take on our biggest adventure yet, becoming parents. Yeah, that's right. Newlyweds is now Nearly Parents and we're bringing you the same honest, heartwarming takes on our journey to parenthood, I guess.

30:15Join us as we find out what it really means to become a family while trying not to kill each other. Get ready for Nearly Parents, your favourite new podcast.

30:31in the wealth money can't buy you talk about 90 of your joy comes from your partner that feels like a lot of percent and you you really think that i'm blessed to have an amazing partner uh to share a life with her name is al she's uh waiting for me to return i've been on the road for three weeks. So day after tomorrow, I will be back home. She's waiting for me with our little dog, Holly, who's a five pound charky. I call her super chum because she's with me all the time. And I have found that 90 % of your joy comes from your life partner. And if you don't believe me, and I know you're not, but find a partner, and I've seen this in people's lives, but find a partner who creates nonstop drama and see how your life looks in every other dimension.

31:29It just consumes you. If you hang around with energy vampires and dream stealers, it just completely messes up your life. And some people get in situations, and I've seen it happen, where they pick the wrong partner and they're dealing with the implications for 15 years. some people there's a lot of projection in relationships it's it's another old idea which is heal what hurt you so you don't bleed on people who didn't cut you so a lot of people we all bring our our history i was going to say baggage but history history is a better way baggage is right history is a better way of putting it we all bring our our trauma we all bring our trauma and I find choosing someone who might have lighter trauma leads to a simpler life.

32:20I, for many years, date a lot and never found anyone that I really truly loved. And I was probably negative for them and likewise all day round. And then I met my wife and she was my greatest friend. And truth is, she was my great friend. And one day she walked out in a bikini and I went, oh my God. And I suddenly thought, God, you're a chick. I was like, hi. And since that day when I met her, my life has done this. It has only got better. Yes, it's had downs and ups and things like that. And so I kind of totally agree with your philosophy. And that's why it connected with me so much. However, there are people who haven't found love and they are finding it hard to find love.

33:10So would it be easier then to, if 90 % of your joy comes from your partner, why wouldn't you just stay single? Why wouldn't you just not find a life partner and just go through life just looking after yourself? Well, the great thing about a human life is we get to live it how we want to. So I'm in no way saying here's a certain way to live. That chapter is just a reminder for people who are in a relationship or looking for a relationship about how important your relationship with a significant other is. I was smiling as you were speaking because I thought about one of the other chapters in the family section, which is the 10 ,000 dinners question.

33:49And it sort of speaks to your relationship with your wife. And so Ayesha, I was reading the Financial Times, and Ayesha Vardag was interviewed. And Ayesha Vardag, in case you haven't heard of her or not familiar, she's one of the UK's top divorce lawyers. She's worked with the superstar footballers, the movie stars, et cetera. And she was asked, you know, Ayesha, you've seen so many relationships fall apart. What's your advice for a great relationship? first thing she said was separate bedrooms and then she said 10 000 dinners and the interviewer said what do you mean 10 000 dinners she said well looks fade lust can dissolve but if you see yourself having 10 000 dinners with this person keep them close because great love is hard to find Yeah.

34:45Do you know what that is? Very profound. And I think that's, it's exactly what I can see in with my wife. I would much prefer to go and play Jenga with my wife in a pub in the English countryside than spend time with anyone else. And we've been together five years. So you really live by the philosophy that if you can spend 10 ,000 hours with someone, then that feels like a good life partner. It's a metric. If you can see yourself having 10 ,000 dinners with someone, then there's a great chance that the relationship will last. But I'd love to go macro. So the book is based on the eight forms of wealth.

35:27The first form of wealth is growth. The second form of wealth is wellness. I was once in Qatar giving a live event. Someone handed me a piece of paper. I said, Robin, tonight in your hotel room, read this. I did. It said on the piece of paper that night, health is the crown on the well person's head that only the ill person can see. In another wisdom tradition, they say, when we are young, we would sacrifice all of our health for wealth. And when we get old and figure out what life is all about, we'd sacrifice all of our wealth for a single day of health. So the second form of wealth, 20 chapters on the science, the latest on how do you get healthy and how do you protect and defend your energy and your longevity.

36:09Third form of wealth we talked about is family. Fourth is craft. Two trips ago when I was in London, I got out of the hotel and there was this London black cab, but it was like perfect. It was like the Taj Mahal. It was like the Taj Mahal of cabs. It was like the Sistine Chapel ceiling of London cabbies. What can I behold here? It was sparkling. He was even wiping down his tires. So as we drove to the airport, I asked him about his approach. Like, deconstruct this. Why do you do this? He goes, well, this isn't just a job. This is for me. I get to meet people. This is what I do for a living. This is my pride.

36:44It has to be done beautifully. When we got to the airport, he actually goes, here's what I do before every customer gets in. And I kid you not, he had this spray thing. It's like wiping all the windows, cleaning the seats. And he goes, watch this. And he had a portable shampooer. And you know how in London cabs, some of them have carpeting. He shampooed the carpet. He goes, okay, got to go. Bye. Now, took off. So if you see your job as a job, and I'm not saying you have to work all the time. I believe in rest. I believe rest is not a luxury. It's a necessity. I believe enjoying the fruits of your labor.

37:22But there's 20 chapters in this section on craft that teach how do you achieve mastery of what you do? How do you push masterworks into the marketplace? One chapter is make your project x that's your taj mahal why because when you push magic into the marketplace it gives you a form of wealth inside it makes you feel great about your work it gives you a sense of purpose which is one of the ways to live a rich life but how do you find your purpose it's hard well i'd say the first thing is often our purpose is right in front of us explain that well Well, have you been to a coffee shop where, let's say there's 10 people working, nine are checked out, one still has a sparkle in her eye?

38:16Have you been to a hotel where you walk in, most people are going through the paces? They're, you know, like cyber zombies, not present. Yet there's one who goes the extra mile and is a merchant of wow. that's someone who sees that all labor has dignity. That's someone who takes their work seriously. And I think all too often we want the rewards of world-class without doing what world-class requires. We live in a world right now where people want to be fit, but they don't want to join the 5 a.m. club or the 6 a.m. club. We want a world right now where people want to be billionaires, but they want to watch TV for hours all night or watch dancing puppies or whatever.

39:01What would you say to someone who feels that they don't have time to put your philosophies into action? We all have 168 hours in a week. I've heard that so many times. And I say this very, very respectfully and very sincerely. But I hear people saying, I don't have time. And I wish we could put a video camera on that person for a week so they could see how they're spending their time. Someone once said, we wish we had more time, but we squander the time we have. So we were to follow, I would predict if we were to follow 100 % of those people who say they don't have time, they would be shocked by all the time they're wasting, especially on digital pursuits.

39:53I mean, you can look at the numbers right now, how much time we spend in front of the white screen every day, chasing trivial pursuits that amount to nothing. I believe that an addiction to distraction is the death of our creative production. How many of us are doing real work versus fake work? How many of us are involved in recreation when we have free time? recreation, like reading a book, taking a nature walk, having a family meal. You're in such a great city for art, going to the Tate Modern. Those things recreate us. But so many of us are sitting in front of a screen addicted to watching people doing these dance moves or bloopers or watching celebrities put on their mud masks, and we're never going to get that time again.

40:41So I hear this. I don't have time. The real question is, where are you investing your time?

40:50This is a really hard question, but if you, someone listening to this right now, who says, you know, they've read your books and maybe they're meditating and doing different things and they're still not happy. What would you say to them is one of your rules or your philosophies that you say this is the philosophy to happiness or to potentially get towards that place well that that's a very big question yeah and and what i would say to someone who's saying well i'm doing everything and i'm not happy i would if if i was mentoring that person i'd really want to know what they're doing because if you if you use the tools and i mentioned so many of them in the wealth money can't buy.

41:36Like MVP. I start my day off with MVP, meditation, visualization, and prayer. There's five morning questions I suggest in your journal. I can get into them very quickly. What am I grateful for? Where am I winning, which builds momentum and energy? What will I let go of today? What a powerful question. Number four, what does my ideal day look like? One paragraph, because clarity breeds mastery. What does my ideal day look like? And then number five, what does my last day look like? Imagine every morning, what does my last day look like? That's a great protocol to help you stay focused on living your finest life.

42:18So being in nature every day. One of the chapters is recruit a dead board of directors, reading the books of the great people. I could talk about a lot of the different protocols and tools. If you do these kinds of tools, even your morning routine, your pre-sleep ritual, the quality of your sleep, stripping out the energy vampires because of the power of a great social circle. If you're doing all of these things, then you're going to be happy. Does it mean that every day you wake up singing from the mountaintops in a loincloth like a monk? No, we're human. But we'll be much happier doing these protocols and habits than if we don't do them.

43:05Some people find it hard, right? They feel like they're stuck. And they may be stuck in a job or they're stuck in a relationship or they're stuck in an environment where people surrounding them are vampires. What do you say to someone to become unstuck? KMF, keep moving forward. did you see uh schwarzenegger's netflix series arnold yeah it's amazing okay so there's one unbelievable unbelievable so interesting yeah and i'll have to watch it again but he talked in one scene about his mother-in-law his former mother-in-law one of the kennedys and she said you know just just keep keep moving forward just keep keep moving forward and i think that's really important.

43:46You know the tragedy that family, the Kennedys have experienced. Like the patriarch, Joseph P. Kennedy, he lost his eldest son in that bombing mission. He lost his daughter, Kick, in a plane crash. He lost his other daughter. He lost his son, the president, John F. Kennedy from an assassination. He lost Robert Kennedy from an assassination. I mean, that's too much for one parent to bear. I mean, just think about the tragedy that family went through. And so the advice that he learned from that family and from his mother-in-law is just, just keep moving forward. And as simple as it sounds, someone stuck in a relationship, keep moving forward, stuck in a job, just keep moving forward.

44:38But to be more precise, We have more power and freedom to choose than we think. Oh, I can't. I can't. It's my job. I can't leave this relationship. We've been together 10 years. Yes, you can. Yes, you can. The thing about a victim is they give their power away to their excuses. The thing about a victim is they give their power away to external causes so much, they think they're powerless. But we all have power to leave the relationship that's toxic, to leave the job that it doesn't suit us. We have power to get up off the couch and take the first walk that eventually leads to us winning a marathon.

45:22We have the power to put away the phone and write the first page of our bestseller. We all have that power. All the people from across the planet who listen to you, someone will be the new best-selling author someone will run a marathon someone will write the screenplay someone will launch the new venture i would say to all those people listening from across the world who love jamie lang why not you but oh but i those people are different no genius is less about genetics and more about our habits get it done stop the excuses is get it done. No one's going to come and help you write the book. You've got to do it.

46:05And the more you own your power, the more powerful you become. The thing I really struggle with, personally, is I spread myself too thin and I'm bad with time management. And I know a lot of people that because I think that if I'm not doing something, I'm going to miss out on that thing. And what happens with that is that actually you're probably not giving 100 % to each thing that you're doing how do you counter that one master work versus 1000 mediocrities be like the duomo the duomo is this magical structure in milan you know how long it took to make it 600 years be willing i call it your project x one thing about the great masters is they do one thing really really well even if it takes 15 years to do it jd salinger spent years on Catcher in the Rye.

46:57Did you know he never wrote another book, but he wrote Catcher in the Rye. Are you serious? He never wrote it. Well, he did write other books, but he didn't publish them. He couldn't stand the success that Catcher in the Rye generated. So he retreated to a concrete bunker in New Hampshire and he kept on writing for the rest of his life. I think 20 more books, but he never published another book. So all I'm saying is be a minimalist versus a maximalist. You're absolutely right, Jamie. We live in a world where we're under this pressure, put out more videos, put out more content, do more things, launch 10 businesses.

47:36I know so many entrepreneurs, they suffer from shiny toy syndrome. They've never seen a new business that they don't like. What the masters do is they build one Taj Mahal. Takes them 21 one years. Or they build one business that takes them four years. Patience. It's so simple. We live in a quick fix world where I think how quickly everything moves has created a brain that wants things instantly. It probably relates to a dopamine addiction. And so to strip away complexity and to live a simple life and to be monomaniacally focused around just a few things, you're going to have so much more free time.

48:23And here's the thing, the output you will have will be times 10 higher in quality. What do you think your biggest success is? A few things come to mind. My children. I've got grounded, great children who are amazing human beings. My relationship with Elle, my relationship with my parents, my dad will be 87 in June. My mom, great relationship with my family is success. I feel good that I've been helpful to a lot of people through my books and my work. I feel it's a success, the work I've done on myself. I still have a long way to go, but I've come a long way. Things that used to bother me don't bother me anymore.

49:15So that's how you can see you're growing. Things that used to really activate me, now it's like water off a duck's back. And that's why I think that the first form of wealth and the wealth money can't is growth. I mean, to build intimacy with who you are, to know your gifts and your talents, to become the person you know in your heart you're meant to be is a form of riches. It's so important in this world where we celebrate outer things versus inner growth. What is your biggest failure then? Well, you know, you've heard this a million times. I don't really see anything as a failure. It was all grist for the mill.

49:56I wouldn't be here talking to you right now if it wasn't for my failures. I don't see them as failures. They were necessary for me to learn lessons and become who I am today. I saw a quote once from Anthony Hopkins, the actor, who said, he was asked, do you live with regrets? He says, no, don't have time for regrets. We do some good things, we do some bad things, but you move on and you learn from it. As long as you're learning from it's okay. Do you think that's right? Yes, I do. I very much. I believe the past is a school to learn from, not a prison to be chained in. I'd also say the discomfort of growth is always less than the heartbreak of regret.

50:38Like just get in the game. If you want love, go ask that person out, fall in love, have a great love story. If your heart gets broken, it wasn't a failure. It was a success. It was a success. You loved. No growth in love is a waste. If you want to launch a new business and it fails, okay, got it. Now I know how to hire the right people. Now I know the importance of making a profit. It's all part of the process. It's the ego that judges a failure is a failure. And often this fear of failure and this fear of laughter and this fear of rejection, it causes us to play so small with our lives. And we spend the best hours of our greatest years watching television in a subdivision.

51:30So I'd rather get in the game. I'd rather get bloodied. I'd rather love and try and dream and learn and grow. I want to get to the end, you know, George Bernard Shaw, right? He talked about something like, at the end, I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, not a feverish little clod of excuses about why the world wouldn't make me who I wanted it to make me. And I think ultimately, just to get a little philosophical, life is short. We learned that from what happened a few years ago. Yeah. I don't know what your thoughts are, but the world fell. The world fell. We experienced collective trauma.

52:15So what do we see now? Revenge travel. Everyone's going to Rome. Everyone's on an airplane. Everyone is trying to live in the moment because we've realized with that brush with our mortality, we've realized how fragile life is. And I just, if I may, because I think it could be helpful. Life is incredibly fragile. And as human beings, we are a species of great postponers. We put off the love. We put off the dreams. We put off speaking our truth and being ourselves. We put off reading the classics and listening to music so beautiful it would bring tears to our eyes until the kids are grown up. And work is a little easier.

52:54Well, to tell it like it is, we don't know what could happen later today. Look at the world now. It's a world of poly crisis. We don't know what could happen today. It could be a meteor, it could be an accident, it could be an illness. So to live to the point, I think is very powerful. It's very rare, but it's very powerful. And as strange as it might sound, to keep your mortality front and center so you're always connected with the shortness of life is a very powerful way to live. Before we wrap up, I'm going to ask you a quick, for our questions but um if someone is thinking about buying your book the wealth money can't buy why should they buy it i i spent 12 of last year i spent 12 months pouring my heart and my soul on this book i did over 20 manuscripts of the book with perhaps 10 000 changes in each manuscript I suffered for this book.

53:53So I've worked absolutely hard to make this the most valuable book I've ever written. Why should they read it? Because it's a whole new way of seeing success. Society says success is hustle and grind your way to making a ton of money. We celebrate the billionaire, but we don't celebrate the gardener who keeps the neighborhood clean and has a beautiful family life. We celebrate the corporate tycoon. We don't celebrate the human being who is authentic and keeps their promises and has inner peace, which I think is the new luxury good. So again, one of the forms of wealth is money, and I teach how to get there, but there's eight forms of wealth.

54:36And when people read the eight forms of wealth and the different sections, I think it'll revolutionize their understanding not only of success, but how to live their richest life. I have eight questions that I want to quickly quick fire you before we end the conversation. Are you ready for this? Sure. By the way, thank you for this. Really, honestly, thank you because I know how busy you are. I know how I can imagine the amount of people who message you, try and meet you, try and connect with you in the thousands, hundreds of thousands, maybe millions. And so I feel very privileged to sit here with you for this last hour.

55:14So thank you so much for that. It's been amazing. Thank you for your time. So we have eight questions. You ready for this? What's a saying or phrase that always makes you smile or cheers you up? You know, my mother used to say when I was growing up, you've got a very bright future. That just used to make me feel so good. It's a great one. Best compliment you ever received? From my dad. You're helping a lot of people. What scares you most about yourself?

55:47I can't think of anything that scares me about myself. It's a good answer. When was the last time you cried and why? Well, I cry at movies. I remember in my 20s, I went with some law school friends, and it was just so embarrassing. We went and saw Driving Miss Daisy. It's an old, have you ever seen it? I haven't seen it. It's an old movie, Morgan Freeman. Just like heartbreaking. heartbreaking what a won the oscar i think and i like they were just sitting there like i look you know and i was like pouring like crying my eyes out miss daisy miss miss daisy like you know what happened at the end and they're like this they're like honestly they're and i'm like crying like how um so i had i had that in car and cast away have you ever seen cast away tom hanks i went to um the cinema with all my buddies, seven of us.

56:45As soon as that bull Wilson went out to see any, Wilson, I was in tits. And I had to put my hands up because I didn't want anyone. And all my buddies were looking at me like, what are you guys like? Because he's lost his bull. Are you kidding me? That was like, what happened to Miss Daisy? What happened to Miss Daisy? It's traumatising. Didn't you guys see that? Didn't you see that? Like, what's wrong with you people? I would say I'm a great lover of art. Yeah. And when I saw the Michelangelo's Sistine Chapel ceiling with my kids, I cried. Really? When I saw the birth of Venus by Botticelli, I cried.

57:32Yeah. Why? Why does it, what does it do to you? Well, the great thing about art is it connects us with our humanity. That's why I spent a lot of time in art galleries and museums. Like art frees us of the mundane. Art shows us what's beautiful about the world. Art makes us more sensitive. Art makes us more human. And when you, and art room, and also I think art is communing with mastery. So being around great art, the creator, stardust rubs off on us. because you know look how much time it takes to produce a masterwork it reminds us of of hard work commitment beauty the creation of magic what is something you can't let go of my mission my mission my mission is my oxygen this um writing these books creating the content giving presentations, traveling the world, evangelizing a message, reminding people of their potential for possibility, mastery, decency, all those things.

58:48It's just like a deep fire in my belly. 31 years after I started, I think I'm just getting going. Yeah. And when people come up to you and say, I mean, you've changed my life, what does that make you feel? Well, the first thing I say to them is, thank you, but you changed your life. I didn't change their life. I wrote books that gave them an idea and then they acted on the idea. They exercised their human power, which everyone who's listening has, and they did it. So I say, thank you, but don't give... In my mind, it's like, don't give me your power. You did it. Applaud yourself. What's something that you would be embarrassed for people to know?

59:30I would say, I'm not really embarrassed, but I'm a huge fan of country music. I love country music. I don't think there's anything embarrassing, but it's just so amazing, especially the new country, like Parker McCollum. And these people are incredible. So part of my, if you want to be happier, we talked about happiness, like music. People don't talk about music. Like I make playlists all the time for specific occasions. If it's a New Year's Day, family playlist. I'm going to go, okay, play Nightmares on Wax, and I'm going to play, you know, more Chiba and this, or it could be whatever. What turns you off?

1:00:07Rude people. What turns you on? Great music, great art, great people doing amazing work, kindness, human acts of generosity. Last question, and then you're free. What do you like most about yourself? I've been through a lot in my life. I haven't become bitter. I think in many ways I still have protected my childlike heart. I still look for the best in people, hunt for the best in people. I think I'm still very enthusiastic. I still cry at movies. Still look for country music still want to have a conversation with the taxi driver so i don't think i've einstein has a great phrase and he said never lose your holy curiosity i i pray i haven't lost my holy curiosity robin thank you so much um it's been incredible i want everyone to go and buy your book and buy all of your books because it changes your life it really does thank you so much for coming on great company.

1:01:23Been an absolute pleasure. Thank you for your time, Jamie. That's amazing. Very good. Just a lovely, lovely episode. What a lovely man. What I like as well is that he gave me his number and now I have Robin Sharma who is really an inspiration towards me in my phone. That's amazing. Will you ever call him? Probably not. If I need coaching, I probably will. Yeah, but what a lovely man. Yeah, just amazing. in so many ways. I feel very full from listening to that interview. And I hope you guys did too. I really hope you've taken something from that. And if you haven't read his books, honestly, please do.

1:02:02Yeah, we'll put links in bio. Links in buyers and all those kind of things. Jemima, thank you for being an amazing producer once again. And thank you for being a wonderful presenter. If you enjoyed the episode, please share it with your friends, your family members. If you haven't subscribed to the show, please do that. Also, follow us on social media and send us messages at Great Company Podcast. Everything is in the show description. and we'll see you next week, of course, for another episode of Great Company. Great Company. Hoot. Hoot. To all of you owls.

1:02:46Hi, this is Knox from the Popcast with Knox and Jamie. And maybe like us at the Popcast, you also know people who have been smokers or vapors. And Zen is the one product it seems like everyone is talking about. Because there are many good reasons to make a change to Zen nicotine pouches. Reasons like Zen nicotine pouches are still America's number one choice for smoke-free, hands-free nicotine satisfaction. And you can choose between 10 varieties, each variety available in either 3 or 6 milligrams. Check out zen.com slash find to find Zen at a store near you. Warning, this product contains nicotine.

1:03:17Nicotine is an addictive chemical. This episode is brought to you by Huggies Little Movers. It's fun having a baby that loves to move, but it can be challenging to find a diaper that can keep up with them. Huggies Little Movers is designed to move with your baby with either the double grip strips or the new HugFit 360-degree waistband. You can be confident relying on Huggies Little Movers for your active little ones. Huggies Little Movers, made with double grip strips or the new HugFit 360-degree waistband, so your little double can keep moving like you. Huggies, we got you baby

1:04:18in your favourite podcast platform to see why.