Sean Payton: Sleeping at work, missing family | Forward Progress

0:00As we wrap up the week, we're bringing you one of the many positive messages from our past interviews. Each Thursday, we're sharing stories of our most watched athletes, celebrities and leaders. We hope these problem solving narratives inspire you to tackle obstacles in your own life. This week, Sean Payton. You had to miss your younger sister Molly's wedding. And this was, you know, I think you knew at the time that your dad wasn't going to be able to make it because he was already getting sick. What do you remember from the letter that you wrote, Molly? Man. Holy cow. She said she still has it.

0:45Did she really? It's one of the hard things about our profession. There's some things you miss that you normally would never miss. And as a coach now, you try to really be mindful of that. But I'm sure it was very apologetic, very proud of her, hate that I can't be there. You know, I think it was probably tough for her getting married with my dad being sick. And, you know, you want your family to be at the wedding. I mean, obviously, like, it's your hard work that has provided for a great life and lifestyle for all those close to you. But flip side of that, how do you see the hours that you have to invest take their toll on family?

1:35There's a lot of great things about the job. And then there are a lot of things that aren't good. It's missing just little things. So it's not the big events. It's just, man, it's the little steps that take place as your children grow. And it's easier now as they're older, but look, that's one of the things that troubles you, you know, when there's like the first steps taken or the first word spoken or, you know what I mean? those are those are times where just the hours and the lack of sleep and the amount of time spent it's it's a very selfish profession at times and it takes from you especially with the extraordinary success that you've had i'd imagine they're like that's a just internal battle yeah at times how do you reconcile you know i don't know that they're honestly i think it's still something that i that I find myself still work, you know, working on and thinking about, and there's still regrets.

2:44There's still like what just, just how much it can consume you. And it's much more challenging when you're an assistant who you're working for someone. And so I try to be hopefully as mindful as that when it comes to a birth, when it comes to a wedding, when it comes to all of those things that those are important. And I think ultimately it comes up with players all the time. And I I think that's one of the things that you try to work on more is finding a better balance, one that can still sustain success, but also at home. So you thought you were working really hard in college, and then you get to the NFL and realize the demands are so much greater.

3:32In what ways? Well, the immediate change was just getting to a place like Philadelphia, and all of a sudden you're dealing with pro quarterbacks that have been in the NFL for three or four years, and a guy like John Gruden and a very talented staff, and you realize that in order to teach you have to become at some point the expert. And so there was that immediate, that was a step where, man, for a period of about six months, you ever seen the firm yeah yeah i kind of felt like tom cruise on the firm you're just every time you went home you're my hair you were just lack of sleep trying to get caught up at work megan was being born she had colic you know it it was it was um hectic to catch to catch up with everyone else in the room so that you weren't as this as one of the young assistants you know constantly listening to a language you didn't understand how often did you used to sleep at the office a lot a lot in new york um a lot in new york at the meadowlands they there was a perfect couch um and why well when you when you looked at a half an hour home and a half an hour in the morning that equaled an hour you know do you want four hours or five hours you know it was just the But sleep.

4:55Yeah. In other words, it happens. It'll happen now. Only we have a sleep room, you know, and so for a coach that's got a half an hour commute both ways on two nights of the week, that hour can can be important. What about the schedule makes it that bad? Wednesdays and Thursdays are long nights for us. And can they be more efficient? I suppose. But they're long because there's a lot of things that we can't do prior to those two nights that have to get done. And so, look, on a Wednesday night, there might be we're out by 11. That's great. But there have been some 2.30. And then when does the day start the next day, typically?

5:386.30, 7. You know, you're prepping for the meetings. So, look, this is the assistant coach. and obviously the schedule for the head coach is similar because I'm in those meetings, and yet those guys have a lot of stuff to do when we break the meetings. So we try not to have too many of those. We had too many a year ago. You did. Yeah, and yet we've had a lot of success. That's it for now, but if you're hungry for more In-Depth with Graham Bensinger interviews, head over to youtube.com slash Graham Bensinger. You can dive into our deep library, which includes more than 2 ,000 clips spanning 12 plus years.

6:22Thanks again for listening.