'I think Christmas should be at the end of January'

22:31Anna Williamson:I have just been wanting to put a bit of goodness back into the body post very busy work time. Obviously, Luanna, I've had Celebs Go Dating. I've had lots of other bits and pieces going on. Felt a bit depleted in my nutrition. Lots of eating crew food and eating on the go. Lots of petrol station sandwiches. Just feeling a bit shitty. So I was like, I want to put a bit of health back in. It was in the old Celeb Farm Shop. and my mate Ed who runs the Celeb Farm shop he was like yeah have you tried this got a new range in if me bone broths and I was like oh I don't know a lot of people have you seen this bone broth coffee and stuff coffee yeah I've seen it as a coffee bone broth coffee no I haven't heard it back well this is it I was a bit like and I'm gonna be completely honest I thought oh it's a bit faddy everyone waffling on about their bone broth yeah even though I can appreciate you know whatever the health benefits anyway he said I've got this new range they're all in these snazzy little cartons um really lovely organic and he was like i'd really like you to try one so i was like okay i will went home so then freya bone broth is the brand i think they've got a vegan one they do i believe i have bought this maybe you have celebrity farm shop so they've got different four different varieties like a vegan one which is obviously you know soy one there's a duck one i think or a beef one and a chicken one well let me tell you now this was the most delicious bone broth it's obviously it's very stock-esque show me that's all it frazier not freya no it's freya it's oh yours is different one no yeah i've got this one f-r-e-y-a oh i've got the frazier f-r-e-j-a frazier vegan broth there you go that's the one i'm looking at oh it's popped it up there this was the most delicious it is the same babe is it it's probably pronounced freya but it's with the j it's with a j oh apologies yeah just look different packaging oh sorry guys it's exactly the same one well no mine's just the vegan one oh sorry i've got the vegan one i was looking for the orange one the chicken one um absolutely delicious so i took it home heated it up i thought what do i do with this then you can just drink it as a normal little cup of whatever cup of soup but i did it with um i did like a bit of a ramen i used it as kind of the ramen um stock basically so i had a little bit noodles in there some spring onions a little bit of um leftover roast chicken i put on top of it and you know what this was fucking delicious it felt wholesome yeah it felt filling it's just so sodding healthy um and now i'm obsessed with it basically i hate to sound like a dickhead influencer but i love this bone broth so freya bone broth i can thoroughly recommend and if it's got any health in it then i'm here for it what is it um how flavorful is it i found it quite flavorful because i thought it was going to be yeah dull as dish water i mean it It is watery stock, but to be honest, I thought it tasted really delicious.

25:19Anna Williamson:Really quite chickeny, quite concentrated. I put a bit of soy in it and stuff and everything else, but loved it. And now I'm obsessed with Freya bone broth. So that's my recco of the week. A bit of health in there. Also a very low-calorie little snack if you're after that as well. Or a meal. It's such a good meal. I'd like veg to it. I often do that with the Itzu noodle pots. I'd take it out of the pot, put it in a bowl, top it with some goyoza. That's it. I sort of did that. I'm hungry. I sort of did that with the bone broth and it was really yum. So there we go. That's your Eccosecchers, guys.

25:53Well done. Right, let's dive into some messages. We've got a message from Anon, so BJ Master. Check you. I've just listened to your episode with the girl who got jizzed in her eye on a camping trip. My story doesn't involve a jizzy eye, but it does involve one of the most embarrassing moments. I was travelling around in Australia in my youth and I was staying in a hostel in Brisbane. The hostel rep, aka overly confident knob that would always make my knickers wet, took a gang of us out for the night to show us the sights of Brisbane. On the way home, I went via the beach with the hostel knob as he wanted to demonstrate the squeaky sound to me.

26:32Only me. How lucky. I was easily pleased at 21. well one thing leads to another and I end up giving him a blowjob I must admit I did get compliments back in the day for my BJ skills do you remember that when you were younger it was like wanting to be like you were scaled weren't you rated, rate my BJ

26:52Anna Williamson:no longer rate my fart, rate my BJ yeah it was, it was like rate my BJ and you're like super proud of your BJ skills yeah what even is one he was stood up and I was Kneeling in the sand. When I'd finished giving him possibly the best BJ of his life, I went to get up, but my legs had gone to sleep. What follows is this guy. This guy watching me crawling around on my hands and knees trying to get my circulation back. Was he occasionally attempting to get me on my feet? Oh, my gosh. What an itch. What an itch. I was like this best beater. And she's like, eh, eh, like a limbless fish. This literally can't move.

27:41Slothering along the beach. The next morning, there's a knock. And the same hostel rep comes to call for his girlfriend who was in the same dorm as me. The mixture of fear on his face that I would say something to her and look of embarrassment on my face of the night before playing out in my head. The only thing that righted things was I couldn't stand the girl he was dating in my dorm. so I revelled in the fact I'd had her boyfriend's cock in my mouth and she thought she was the one and only. Oh, wow. Love you both. Every week you entertain me as I put my washing away. Love, BJ Master. Aw, thank you, darling.

28:14What a wholesome story.

28:17Anna Williamson:Message from one of us next. So, Hazel. Hello, Animo, and the beautifully voiced, Bex. That's what she needs to hear. There you go, B-dog. I love the pod and all that waffle, and isn't it just? But I wanted to get straight into it and ultimately get your view on boundaries. Okay. What is deemed as acceptable in a monogamous relationship? Okay. It might be a long one, so apologies in advance. Bit of a background. I've been with my boyfriend now for a year and a half. I'm 32 and he's 36. And he has moved down to Somerset from the West Midlands to be with me after we did semi-long distance for a year.

28:49Anna Williamson:Now, before I say I'm all about what I'm about to say, I just want to caveat this by saying he is a kind and wonderful man who loves his family and friends and cherishes the land that I walk on. So I don't want this to come across like a character assassination. and that he isn't a great partner overall, but I really do need some advice on what to do. Like yourselves, he is part of the entertainment industry, mainly the modelling side, so is often surrounded by beautiful women on a regular basis, something I've not been too bothered about. But since he's moved in, I have been noticing that I'm not comfortable with some of his actions.

29:19Anna Williamson:Firstly, he has a tendency to hide things from me, mainly from his past. I feel I'm quite a level-headed human being and I absolutely never judge people for their pasts, having embarked on the slutty college years myself. Wahey! we've all done it honey the things he has hidden from me are not game changers for instance one of the things that was he was on a dating show sort of along the lines of Love Island but before it's time now I really don't care that he was on a dating show but the fact that he told his friends and family to hide it from me is the thing that I do care about like I said this is just one example and over the last few months there are several more things that have cropped up that he's hidden from me another example a lifelong STI that I really should have known about as I can contract it That's a really big problem.

30:01Anna Williamson:I'm guessing that's herpes? Is that only lifelong STI? Yeah, maybe. Oh, or AIDS. Yeah, exactly. Whatever it is, you should always be completely upfront about your sexual history, guys. Like, that is a hard, absolute. So I'm starting to see a pattern, she said. I have explained that although he doesn't have to share everything with me, I'm starting to feel like he's trying to filter my view of him. And that it makes me feel uneasy that his automatic response to certain things is to hide them and or lie about them. Transparency is a key thing for me when in a relationship. When I start to notice patterns of hiding and deception, it then makes me question other things and whether what he tells me is true.

30:38Anna Williamson:Secondly, I called him out a few months back as I noticed he was keeping in contact with women he had slept with previously. The odd message here and there, and I'm not too fussed about, but one person I noticed, let's call her Sinead, the messages were more consistent and the conversations were more in-depth than I was comfortable with, and it was always him reaching out to her. I asked him why he did this and if I had anything to worry about. Because for me, when I'm in a relationship, I don't feel it's appropriate to keep in touch with people that I have shared a certain level of intimacy with, as we aren't friends.

31:06Anna Williamson:I removed them from social media as I no longer see the benefit of them being on my radar, let alone check in with them. I'm a little old-fashioned, I know. And in this day and age, that's starting to feel like a rarity. I don't think that's old-fashioned, honey. I think that's just you and your values, quite honestly, and your boundaries. I asked him whether he kept in touch for validation, whether he was keeping doors, old doors open, or if there was something more going. on his answer was i'm just trying to be nice i explained to him that regardless of whether the messages were innocent or not and even if there is no intention behind them it was still towing the line for me as to what i feel comfortable with for a bit of background my example of men and loyalty hasn't been great my granddad endlessly cheated on my gran for the entirety of their marriage my dad had a five-year affair whilst he was with my mom and my ex of eight years cheated on me with his boss so i'm probably more sensitive to these situations than others or my darling do you just have an absolute rod antenna that is spot on.

31:56Anna Williamson:I'm just throwing it out there. Not his burden to bear, but all of which he knows. After reflecting on this, he said he could understand where I was coming from and he said he will not continue to do so, that he has deleted all messages on his phone from past flings, unfollowed previous dallances of social media, contact numbers, etc. None of which I asked him to do, but something he did on his own accord. Okay, that's good. He showed me his phone and I noted that he had also deleted messages from women that he's worked with that I had seen him messaging. But they're not other colleagues. Why was he deleting some and not the others?

32:23Anna Williamson:I mentioned one woman in particular that I had seen him messaging quite regular. Let's call her Philippa. I asked him why he deleted these messages and stated that this now also feels a little weird if he claims that they are just colleagues and the messages were just about work. He assured me that there was absolutely nothing to it, just that he wanted to make sure there was nothing there that I could read into because I am insecure, charming. This dude's gaslighting you, babe. Over the next couple of months, I tried to move forward, talking it up to not really discussing boundaries and expectations previously.

32:52Anna Williamson:I have a lot more experience when it comes to relationships and I do think of myself as a bit of a mini Anna when it comes to emotional intelligence. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. I'm going to take it as a compliment. Let's hope it was. Now, here are the two things that I'm struggling with the most. Sinead messaged him once she realised he had unfollowed her and asked if she had done something wrong and that she thought they were friends. His response to her about me used the words annoying, unfortunate and a bloody nightmare and reassured her that he still had her on Facebook.

33:20Anna Williamson:Again, something I found odd seeing he'd made such a point about unfollowing people on Instagram and deleting people's numbers when I didn't ask him to do so. Seeing this message really upset me. As not only was he disrespecting me, he was doing it to someone I was uncomfortable with. And it also felt like our conversation after the fact and the empathy and understanding he showed me was ultimately false. I also want to point out that we are in our fucking 30s and that this whole charade about social media, following lists and text messages, it feels like something teenagers would be arguing. arguing about.

33:47Anna Williamson:I'm with you. There is no emotional intelligence in this man, to your point. It's not somewhere I thought I would be at this age. He understood my point and agreed that we should have done better, but that he just wasn't thinking. Lastly, he was showing me his phone yesterday and flicking through the tabs and I noticed there was a screenshot of Philippa, the colleague who he deleted messages from. I queried him about it and his face went grey and it was like he shut down in a state of fight or flight. I then spiralled into a panic at his silence and asked what was going on. I asked if he was sleeping with her, having an emotional affair sexting her or if he was even back on dating apps he just continued to shut down for several minutes not saying anything it got to the point where i was shaking and crying and just demanding that he answer me all my nightmares and past traumas rearing their heads let me tell you ladies these were the longest minutes of my life and looking back on it today with a clearer head i actually feel like it was quite cruel of him to allow me to go through that especially knowing what i have been through previously he finally admitted that he was wanking to the picture of her because he liked her blue nails what now ladies i know who has a wank over blue nails no i don't believe him at all i think that's a cover story personally but let's see now ladies i know this could have been a lot worse but i feel like this broke the last final bit of something inside me yeah i'm not naive and i know this is something that men and women do often and appreciate it's different strokes for different folks but not only have i asked him about this person before surrounding the deleted messages this is someone who he works with and sees regularly it would be like Alex masturbating over pictures of one of his regular PT clients, Alex being my husband, guys.

35:12Anna Williamson:Or Andrew, Lou's husband, wanking over a picture of his PA. Doesn't have a PA, thank God. That was like a thing, I put in our prenup. You're not allowed to put in. That's a joke, obviously. A, we don't have a prenup. B, he doesn't have a PA. I do have a prenup. I do not need to print that and take that out of context. I do have a prenup saying my husband cannot masturbate over one of his PT clients. But it's a good context to put in there. He has admitted that it isn't specific to her that he masturbates to pictures of other women he's worked with, other women he knows, and people he's previously slept with.

35:40Anna Williamson:I think that's weird because normally you sort of would wank to... I don't believe him, though. I think he's talking shit. My instinct and unfortunate experience with this is he's talking shit. It's a cover-up. It's a cover-up to make it less bad than what it actually is. It's what my instinct's telling me. And I'm not... Maybe she's going to tell us. Oh, no, he doesn't like to watch porn. Right. I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. But for me, I can't but feel this is a bit of a violation and something of a betrayal. If it was porn or a celebrity, I wouldn't feel this way because there's an element of distance.

36:07Anna Williamson:Exactly. That's what I think as well. I agree with that. There's no connection. This just feels too close to home and blurring the lines of fantasy and reality. I asked him how he'd feel if the roles were reversed. If he found out I was wanking over a guy at work that I saw regularly and he said he would be mortified and he'd be worrying every time I'd see that person going forward and if it would lead to anything further. So I think if it was an isolated incident, maybe I wouldn't have been so hurt. but off the back of testing my boundaries already, speaking unkindly of me to someone I was uncomfortable with and hiding things from me because he is scared of how I would view him, I am really struggling.

36:36Anna Williamson:I have told him that I am not sure I can move past this and he's distraught. I know a part of that is the shame in him being caught but I know he's also devastated the thought of losing us and what we have. It breaks my heart to see him sobbing in front of me. I also know my worth and I don't deserve to feel constantly disrespected and disappointed. So I guess what I'm asking ladies is do you think I'm overreacting to all of this? How would you feel if it was you? I'm acting like this because of my past traumas is it and is it some sort of self-sabotage or am I invalid or am I uh valid in how I'm feeling I love this man with my heart and I appreciate we're all humans we all have our kinks and we all make mistakes but at the end of the day he's 36 I feel like I'm becoming a teacher to him about what is right and wrong in a relationship and I'm exhausted any advice is welcome apologies for the essay much love granny name Hazel can I start by saying this is a him problem yeah not you you have been gaslit throughout all of this is my honest opinion Lou what do you think look I think this just not going to work because you have different but this does come down to boundaries and you and respect and yeah respect and you're not aligned and I don't think you ever will be aligned.

37:48And I feel in some ways some of what he does feel is shame and that's why he tried to hide the TV show. That's probably why he tried to hide the STI because he's embarrassed and shameful about that. But there is that. But there is also clearly another side to him where he's doing weird shit with people. I'm sorry, you don't wank over blue nails. There's definitely more to that. This guy is a compulsive liar. And I just feel like you haven't been living together that long. You're already feeling like this. Sometimes I just think we hold on to things for too long. And then you get in deeper. And then it's harder to break it.

38:26Whereas actually, I think you know that you're not going to sustain this relationship with him long term. You're 32. I don't know what you see in your future, whether you want marriage and children. But if you do want something like that, don't waste your fucking time. and even if you know what even if you don't want marriage and children don't waste your fucking time because I think that you're just you're not aligned you know you're just not aligned he's not respecting you the one thing that would piss me off the most is how he spoke about you as well in that message that for me would probably be the worst that that for me would be the worst thing out there different people have different things but for me to know that someone that was my my partner in crime and my partner was was speaking so badly of me to someone that they knew that i didn't like and effectively he's slagging you off to someone that he knows you're not comfortable with that would actually be a bit of a deal breaker for me yeah hazel i'm going to give it

39:23Anna Williamson:you straight babes you are settling for scraps and you're settling for scraps because you have had unfortunately for you my darling a really crap run of luck when it comes to relationships and not just your personal relationships but your relationships around you with your granddad, with your father. That's what I was going to say. Your relationship role models are really sketchy. Honey pie, you are settling for scraps. I'm going to ask you some questions here and if the answer to any of these is not a yes, you need to get out. Do you have trust in your relationship? It sounds like it's a no. Do you feel respected?

39:55Anna Williamson:Well, that's a hard no because he's been slagging you off. And is there trust and transparency? Sorry, did I say trust? Is there transparency in your relationship? No. You know the answer to that. All I'm telling you is the facts as a relationship coach, you have to have those foundations in a relationship for it to be a healthy, interdependent, fulfilling relationship. If they are not there, you are in deep trouble, my darling. And also, I know you say it breaks your heart to see him sobbing. He's not sobbing because he's, sorry, he's sobbing because he's got caught out. And I think that, you know...

40:26I don't doubt he's got issues, but those aren't issues yours.

40:29Anna Williamson:Do you know what? But they're his issues. Fucking kick it to the curb. But they're his issues to sort out. And I'm sure, and do you know what, but I will say, you know, having seen it, there will be reasons why he is as he is. Who knows what they are, but that's on him to figure out. He's lied to you from the very start of this relationship. My darling, I don't often go that black and white with my advice, but on this one, this is a terrible relationship. Yeah. Terrible relationship, Hazel, and you're worth more, my darling. You're worth more. Yeah, good luck. Good luck. You just don't need that shit.

40:57Not six months in, living together. I mean okay if it had been like a bit longer and you've got more history but really there's nothing there and the problem is is you would gave it long distance for a year so you actually didn't really know each other probably as well as you thought.

41:12Anna Williamson:There's just no trust. Yeah. She feels like shit. I'm so sorry to say that and I'm so sorry for what you're going through but you are worth more my darling. Right next message from Anon. So Freddie Flap Fondler. He says dear L-A-I-B, Laib. Laib. You want a bit? Laib. Lab, we are the labia. We are the labia. With Al at the end, we are labia. We're labia. Lou, Anna, Imo, Bex, Al. We're labia. We stick agents, Sam, we're labias. Well, where's the second I come from? Labor. Wait, oh. Whatever. Just don't ruin it. Just pretend the I, pretend the I, pretend the I. Labia, labia. Why are you so negative?

41:51Just because I can spell. Why are you coming in here with your negativity? It's just spelling. Well dear Labia as it's now going to be Dear Labia Man fan here who's been on board for nine months now Hi baby after listening to my partner and her bestie constantly recite hilarious Luanisms Oh it's like an orgasm but a Luanism Something that makes you feel good Just teeing it up now Better than sex A Luanism You now fit perfectly into my commutes home each week giving me lots of laughs on each journey Right Down to business I have a story about a shitty stick Brilliant A couple of weeks ago, I had a meeting with a man about school bursary funding, and I needed to come home early from work to meet him at my home.

42:34Arriving at the house ten minutes before he was due, I felt a familiar twitch, and realised I had no choice. I needed to evacuate my bowels, and it couldn't wait. I wasted no time, and within half a minute, I had birthed a baby's forearm, one of my proudest creations in a while. Thankfully, it's one of those silky turds, the kind that requires very little mopping up. I was on schedule. I had adopted a belt and braces approach to ensure I wasn't caught short, so I had been streaming the live view from my doorbell while I was on the shitter, just to keep one step ahead of my impending visitor. Task almost complete, I flushed and then it happened.

43:13Or more to the point, nothing happened. My log just sat there, staring at me from above the waterline. I willed the cistern to refill quickly, glancing at the live view. I was still okay. Another flush and it still stuck there. Stubborn as a mule. Then I saw it. Not a car arriving on my drive, which would have given me extra precious seconds. But no, Mr. Flasher Mac had parked on the road and was now stealthily walking towards my front door. Now, I didn't know what this meeting would entail, but I was fully prepared for a potential tour of my house as part of the assessment process. my house is reasonably clean and tidy but there was no way I wanted to show a man around my house while my third child was wallowing in the toilet bowl I had to think fast I didn't have a coat hanger to hand so I ran downstairs and grabbed a piece of kindling from the basket next to the wood burner sprinted as fast as I could straight past the front door to the living room praying I could get back up the stairs before my visitor ran the bell mission accomplished I had to say kindling's a bit you get all that shitty shit stuck in the kindling You need something metal or plasticky.

44:20Anna Williamson:It's a bit flaky. That's porous. Like a wood flake. It's porous. You use a poo stick, don't you? A stick stick. Not kindling. I used to use a stick stick. Before the poo stick and the poo knife, I used a stick stick. But the stick stick was specifically chosen. Kindling's like rough and flaky. It's a chopped up log. That's the irony. The inner bit. It actually is a chopped up log. It's got rough edges and stuff. The poo stick was an actual hard stick from a hard tree that didn't flake off. I love that stick. It was the perfect bend. It's like a shoehorn. I just don't have that problem. Shoehorn in stick form.

44:56I've never had to chop up like shit. I haven't. Anyway, anyway. I miss that poo stick. It says, I was back in the bathroom and prodding my overbaked shit as the doorbell rang. I prodded, I flushed, I prodded again. Eventually, it slid away. The doorbell rang again. The next dilemma, what the fuck am I going to do with this stick now, I thought. I had nowhere to go and no other option but to throw the stick out the bathroom window. Relieved, I ran downstairs to let the man in, apologising profusely for keeping him. I offered him a coffee and the option to look round the house, but he declined both.

45:25He simply asked to sit and chat. So we ventured into the living room where he took a seat with a lovely view of the patio, upon which lay my shitty stick. I don't know if we'll get a bursary offer, but I know I tried my best. P.S. I returned to Bristol from Geneva last weekend and the belt wankers were out in force. Two to three people deep. Kids, OAPs, inconsiderate fuckers left, right and centre. I couldn't even see the carousel, let alone retrieve a bag from it. I felt it was my duty to spread the word of Louisa. So I casually, I love this, wandered behind each offender in muttering belt wanker under my breath, earning a few stares as I spread the message.

46:05Those closest to me will recognise this story, but to save my blushes at work please give me the porn star name of Freddie Flatt Fondler love you

46:13Anna Williamson:thank you for the story what I love most is the belt wanker very very good I mean and it was the shitty stick for me from start to finish start to finish this poo stick poo stick go off fond memories if you want to hear all about how the poo stick originated you can listen back to previous episodes and remember if you want to get in touch guys just email us like these guys have done with their excellent contributions it's Luanna at at everythingluana.com. Or you can drop us a WhatsApp message on 07521564640.

46:49Anna Williamson:Right, newsy bits. A study finds that teenagers would rather ask AI about periods than talk to their dads. Interesting. That's what we were talking about last week. With AI. Tech and talking. Well, let's see what it says. So a new US study has found that while most teens still turn to their mums for period advice, dads are right at the bottom of the list with even AI chatbots ranking up. This doesn't surprise me though. I don't know any child that would want to talk to. I ask chat GBT quite a lot. I have talked to my dad about my periods. My poor dad gets everything. A new study has revealed something that might not surprise me.

47:31Anna Williamson:Because teens have a lot of questions about periods. Dads are usually the last person to go to. These findings come from the State of the Period 2025 report, which was commissioned by Thinks, Inc. and Period. So it surveyed over 1 ,000 US teens, 13 to 19, who menstruate. And so, yeah. Sure study. Yeah. Two weeks study. Yeah. So according to the report, 98 % of teens actively look for answers when they have a question about their menstrual cycle. But the person they're most likely to go to is overwhelming their mum. That makes sense. Oh, 70 % go to mama. Saying that's their first source. But that would make sense because mums have periods and daddies don't.

48:08Well, dads are last on this list. Dads are actually last. What came tops before dads was friends, internet searches, social media, healthcare providers, teachers or school nurses, AI chatbots, other relatives, influencers, content creators, and then dads at just 14%.

48:24Anna Williamson:I'm actually surprised that AI chatbots are not much higher up, actually. Because like you say, we all love a little bit of chat GPT. we all jump over to that quickly. So they're... Yeah, so it means that teens are more likely to ask the AI chatbot than their own dad. And also this just highlights, doesn't it, how much period stigma still affects. You're so right. Conversations at home with men. Because we try and be, you know, you're very open with Enzo about tampons and sanitary towels and stuff. But yeah. Do you know what? You're right. And I do wonder if it will ever shift. Arguably, should it ever shift?

48:59Anna Williamson:I don't know. I mean, that whole, my dad was part of that generation. My poor dad, I don't think he quite expected it when he had me. But it was always that, go and ask your mum. You know, go and ask your mum. But then my dad is a very open father. And, you know, I can talk to him about anything. And I would have happily had my, I think I said this before, happily had him at the birth of my kids. I don't, for me, a body's just a body. You know, I'm quite a nude person. So are all my family. I think as well, like with this though, like AI is just convenient as well, isn't it? It's always in your pocket.

49:29to ask. It's also quite accurate on a lot of things. I have conversations with my chat GPT. You know how we talked about having these phone things? I say thank you for that. There's no problem. Is there anything else I can help you with? It's very good.

49:44Anna Williamson:It's very convenient but maybe that's where you need. Yeah maybe if you need to come off phones maybe that's we can start there. That's good. But there's the study found that 62 % of teens think that society teaches people to be ashamed of periods. Really? I like that. Still. That's really interesting um 59 say they've personally felt affected by negative attitudes about menstruation 77 uh 77 hide period products when walking out of class i don't think that's a bad thing i mean what you're gonna do wave your tampon as you walk out of maths no i suppose you don't announce if you're going to do a shit do well you do well i was gonna say you know if you're at school and you're leaving a lesson but they probably feel they have to take a bag with them or something They can't just discreetly, as you say, you don't have to announce it, but maybe just holding it in your hand without it being a thing.

50:32Anna Williamson:I mean, being perfectly honest with you girls, say you're at a bar and I'm just thinking about me now. I probably, even though I'm very open and very pro, like talking about all of this and making it, you know, just conversation. If I was sitting at a bar and I needed to go and change my tummy, I wouldn't just pull out my tampon. It's not because I'm ashamed about, I mean, I don't have periods, but I wouldn't feel, it just feels appropriate. It's appropriate and a certain social etiquette. We don't have to constantly flash everything to everyone. You don't need to walk through a restaurant with your moon cut.

51:07I just think there's a certain... I suppose it's like other things.

51:10Anna Williamson:I wouldn't whack out my dental floss or a toothbrush either. You take a handbag to the moon. Even when people take Invisalign out, they sort of go like that and take it out. I think that's appropriate. I think it's when it comes to personal hygiene I think there is a level of discretion around personal hygiene but there shouldn't be shame around it Would you walk through a restaurant with your moon cup in your hand? Well you can carry it in your bag so you don't really need to If you were about to put it in A tampon? Or a tampon? I'd probably hold a tampon I wouldn't be fussed I think I would put it in a bag I think I'd always take a bag.

51:51And I don't know why. Maybe because we're a bit older. But I also think that, like, I always think if I see someone taking their whole handbag to the toilet, I'm like, oh, they're going to change their tampon.

52:00Anna Williamson:Well, true. Or, well, or I think they're having a sneaky vape or they might, you know, a lot of people tend to, you know, take their dental stuff. We say Invisalign nowadays. You know that someone's going to do something in the lavatory that involves going in their bag. Yeah. I do think, though, that it's just a body, like having a period is just what your body does. It's a bodily function. and you shouldn't be ashamed of it. But definitely when we were at school. Yeah, but it's a bit like, say if you talk about this and about, you know, would you hold a tampon through a restaurant? I don't like, like, snogging in public and stuff.

52:30I don't like things. And you could say, well, that's absolutely natural, kissing and sex and all that. But we don't do that in public. Well, I don't anyway. It comes down to personal preference, doesn't it? I don't like people, like, getting off in front of me, like, seeing them, like, okay, like a kiss, fine. But when people, like, got their tongues down each other's toes, I don't want to see that. You're not here for that. Or do you? What do you think?

52:52Anna Williamson:I just think it's a bit unnecessary. Quite honestly, I couldn't tell you the last time I saw it, if I'm perfectly honest with you. Yeah, I'm sure. Would I feel awkward? I don't know. It doesn't make me feel awkward. I just think, oh. Yeah, do it so I'm going to get it wrong. Yeah. I think what's sad, though, about these statistics is I thought genuinely that we'd moved on a bit more than that. Like, when we were at school, so I was at school, you know, in the mid-90s, you know, were. And, yeah, definitely the boys took the piss out of the girls for having the periods. It was definitely a thing.

53:17Anna Williamson:I remember reading Judy Blume, Are You There God It's Me Margaret, which was a book that everybody read about periods. Anyone that's my age would have heard of that. Anyone that's read that, you can totally relate. And it was such a gateway for girls and periods and then the stigma around it and being okay with it. It really helped me, actually. But I would be really disappointed if my Enzo wouldn't. But that's maybe because how I have taught him. But then he is influenced by other kids. So I guess if another child is taught a different way. He'll come here. He'll come here. Dixie, I have to say, and all her mates, because I took them all skiing, and three boys and three girls had, like, the best time.

53:55And I think Dixie was on her period when we were there, and she was like, oh, yeah, I'm on her period. And, like, the boys didn't give a shit. They were just, like, super cool, like, all mates, no romances between the group. It's just a fact of life. And I actually think, I thought all those boys, like, well, they're not boys, they're young men, but on that trip were, like, super easygoing, super grown up like it was just a fact and she was like oh mum can you buy me some tampons from the shop and the boys were there and she didn't care and the boys didn't snigger or bat an eyelid or it was just like normal Would she talk to Andrew about it?

54:29Would she ask Andrew about stuff? Like would she say to Andrew like would you go and get me some tampons? Yeah she'd ask Andrew for tampons and Andrew would get them And would Alex like engage in conversation about periods to Enzo and Al?

54:43Anna Williamson:Yeah but being perfectly honest They're a bit young at the minute, aren't they? Well, when it goes, but he, I think being married to me in particular, but he is pretty open about most things. But yeah, I think he'll be in a, he'll 100 % talk to Els about them, I think. And because I think he, yeah, he knows what it's like, you know, being with me, you know, and what it's like being a woman. But I think, I don't know, I think men should be more and dads should be more supported in giving that information because I guess it is hard to kind of offer support and information if it's not something you've personally experienced yourself I also think that I'm not sure if I'm sure in school they do get taught about periods to a degree but I know that a lot of guys my age don't know or didn't know much about like the actual they were taken out of the classes though but the boys were taken out of our period before they were in relationships with women who then had periods.

55:40Anna Williamson:And it's ridiculous. So many myths then circulate. And I think that's what makes it sort of shrouded in secrecy, really. It's just a fact of life. It's pretty uneventful, isn't it? But it's also, let's be honest, a massive biological fact that why a woman menstruates is all to do with procreation. So men should be able to be knowledgeable about it. I just think back to when I was at school and I had some friends of mine who didn't have a mum and they didn't want to go to their dads. And I know that that was really hard for them. And they used to rely on, you know, the school office, the sick bay used to have the free tammies.

56:16Anna Williamson:And then other mums that would pick up on it through us as friends and would then help support. So I think, I think I really sad. And so I think more general, and that starts with school. I think educating boys and girls the same when it comes to, and also girls when it comes to wet dreams. I mean, we never had a lesson about, you know, what happened to boys. It's all kept so secretive and separate. And I think it is because then we, let's be honest, we snigger about what we did at school, a boy's wet dream. Because we were never given the actual biological. It is a wet dream. They just come and they just have a stiffy and ejaculate.

56:52Anna Williamson:It's part of their puberty. But again, because we weren't taught why that's happening, we then all start to snigger about it. And then again, it's sort of, it's silenced and it's shrouded in stigma. but actually just saying, look, you're a girl, you're going to get a period. You're a boy, you're going to spaff off in your duvet. But making that conversation just not a thing. Everyone's cool about it. I think we should be doing more on that. Knowledge is power and all that. It is. This is a, well, warming story. It was a warming story. A man has donated his kidney to a woman he met after a crash.

57:26So these two people met through tragic circumstances. Tim Swinburne from Wiltshire met Claire Brixley from Somerset in 2004 when he had to knock on her door to explain that her 20-year-old son Ashley had died in a car crash. Oh, how awful. That's terrible. At the time, Miss Brixley was already suffering from kidney failure and she was reliant on dialysis. They kept in touch. Was he a police officer or something? then? He was a family liaison officer. Oh, okay. So they kept in touch and when Mr. Swinborn found out that her previous transplant was failing, he offered her his kidney. He said, giving the gift of life to me is just a human thing to do.

58:15Anyone with a heart would give something to keep someone else alive.

58:18Anna Williamson:What a guy. So they had a successful transplant at a hospital in Bristol. It took four hours in October. Both of them recovered well. Mr. Swinborn She's back at work. And Miss Brickley has gone horse riding for the first time in years. How wonderful. They're both in the process of planning fundraisers. Oh, this is such a good news movement. It's wonderful. She said, he was my family liaison officer, the person who knocked on my door to tell me that my son had been killed in a road traffic collision. He was compassionate. He was such a compassionate man, very easy to talk to, and so supportive of our family.

58:54We just seem to jail, and we've been friends for 21 years. That is so amazing. So it was years later after bonding.

59:02Anna Williamson:That is so nice. All they need to do is just get together now and be happily ever after. What a lovely story out of something so desperately tragic. Oh, that's so nice. Would you give your kidney up to anybody? I'd give it to you. Thanks, babe. To anyone. Yeah, we don't need it, do you? Yeah, if one was healthy. what's weird is then if we don't need it why don't we just all like donate our other kidney well i guess it all depends on if the other one fails you can't just like stick them on ice though no you can't i don't think so i think they have to be like fresh yeah i am in a position where someone very close to me will probably need a kidney donation at some point and i am do it yeah but i would do it absolutely i don't know if i'm ready to deal with you i was asked if i was Well, I think you're going to have to.

59:52Anna Williamson:Well, hopefully it's not for a long time. Don't you have to be a match? Yes, exactly. I am a match. Oh. So I am. You're on the card. So hopefully not for a long time. I'm probably not a match for anyone. Wow. What's your blood type? Do you know? Rare. Just rare. Rare blood. No, I think it's like the most common B positive. Mine actually is the most rare. O negative. Oh, that is rare. I'm A positive, which is very common. I think I'm B positive. Are you? Is that a thing? I don't think that's very common. No, my bastard blood type. I don't find B positive. Okay. What types are there? A, A, B. What is a blood type though?

1:00:29Anna Williamson:Well, it's just the makeup of the cells and properties or something. I don't know. All I know is that I'm O negative, which is the universal blood type. So you could all have my blood, but I can't have your blood. O positive, O negative, A positive, A negative, B positive, B negative. No, but what does it say about O negative? Let's read our particular types. O neg is the universal donor. Yeah, I'm the uvaloversal donor. So anyone can have my blood, but I can't have anyone else's, which is why my blood type, I think it's about 6 % of people that have my blood type. So if you were dying, I have to have my own blood type.

1:01:01Anna Williamson:But she could give it to anyone. But you could take my blood type. It's weird, isn't it? Like, how did they find this out? So I think I'm B positive. B pos, yeah. What does that say about me? It says you can donate to B positive and AB positive people. And what are you? A positive. I'm an A positive. Which is? which is very common yeah you're the most common very common I can donate which is why I'm always asked to donate because they need more and more stocks obviously because if someone needs an emergency blood transfusion and they just grab an own egg they don't have to test their blood type they can just whack it straight in because anyone can take an own egg but so I found out I only found this out so interesting isn't it so if you're in an accident and you need a blood transfusion is there a quick test to see what blood type you are I'm sure I think they're probably It would initially just pump you with an own egg.

1:01:51Anna Williamson:If you need it, I believe. Because they can just stick that straight in you. But that's why I'm always asked to donate. I used to donate a long time ago. I haven't done it for quite a long time. But when I was pregnant, the only reason why I found out why I was, because with your own negative, you have to have these sodding anti-D injections when you're pregnant because your blood type is not compatible with your babies, something like that. And it's to do with when you birth the baby. so when you're and I was so bloody scared of these sodding jabs by the way if you are pregnant and you're only and you need an anti-D there's nothing to worry about I would say a great technique having had three anti-Ds because obviously I needed two in the second pregnancy brilliant the good technique from that nurse was to pinch the top of your arm really fucking hard so you're more concerned about the owl my pinch hurts and then they stab you with this massive needle and get it in you yeah it was fine where do they inject it?

1:02:40Anna Williamson:just in the top of the arm but when so if you so I fell over when I was 36 weeks pregnant with Elle and then because they then worry that there could be an internal bleed they then have to anti-DU again to make sure that there's no blood contamination or sorry all midwives will be screaming at me here but yes it's highly annoying I think it's most if you're negative if you have negative blood so if you like B negative or A negative I think it's with all negative you have to have this shot because your baby might not be it's to do with compatibility of the baby that I remember thinking fucking great.

1:03:15Anna Williamson:Isn't that crazy though that like your baby would be different even though you're like growing it and it's like half of you. Yeah it's half of you. It's crazy. I don't actually know what my kids' blood are. I don't know what my kids are. What's Alex's blood type? A. So they'll either be A or A. Oh really? Yeah there'll be one of each. Yeah one of I don't know what Alex is. How do you know what Alex is? I guess on when you've had an operation often. I only found out what mine was because when I first gave blood it told me. Yeah, it's on some record somewhere. And what's Nye, do you know? Nye is Oneg.

1:03:47Anna Williamson:Oh, she's Oneg as well. She's in the Oneg gang. Wow. Isn't it interesting, though? It's very interesting. Right, time for... It's the Widow of the Week. Right, hi ladies, says Connor. Hope you're having a lovely day. We are, thank you, darling. It's man-fan Connor here. I was having a nice hot bath before bed one day last week and I felt so lazy. I just got my toothbrush and toothpaste out and brushed my teeth in the bath. and spat it into the water to drain away. I thought that's completely genius. Where am I, lazy fucker? Lazy and weird. It's given me salt burn vibes, actually. Oh, gross. Would he...

1:04:23I'm assuming he ran the tap to, like, rinse it. He wouldn't just, like, dunk it.

1:04:27Anna Williamson:I reckon he dunked it in that old piss water, you know, in that knob water. No. Gave it a little rinsey poo. Joy. Oh, no, no, no. Right, next up, a non-so yeasty. Joy. Halo Animo, gay man funny in here, putting a story in that I reckon might make me weirdo of the week or the year strong keep me in on as this story is truly gross but it's fucking hilarious shout out to my sister Emma who loves the pod as much as I do and our weekly catch ups always start with oh my god did you listen to Luanna yesterday anyway I'm blessed or cursed with a rather deep belly button me too me too oh mine's shallow oh it's like a cavern oh I hate I hate my belly button being touched like the Darfur tunnel oh got the ick i can dig my finger in oh this is giving me icky vibes and have a good old root around in there nice i've never really thought much of it until last year i started exercising much more regularly doing a lot of hit and high rock style classes and whilst i love them and my health has never been better it has come with a downside the constant sweating and sweaty gym clothes means I end up getting a re...

1:05:35Ew. Oh, this is really... We found Luzik, guys. I end up... Mine is phlegm. I end up getting a recurring fungal infection infection in my big cavernous, gaping belly button. I need a picture of this belly button. The first time I noticed was because when lying on the sofa after a shower, my cocker spaniel... for fuck's sake kept jumping onto my tummy and wanting to have a good old sniff down there what was he smelling? I kept thinking I've never seen him so alive and excited as smell in his life then I realised that the inside of my belly button was giving off this gross yet kind of tangy and interesting yeasty smell my dog seemed to love it his tail would wag furiously as he desperately tried to shove his snoot under my t-shirt for a good old sniff of my fungusy belly button Anyway, a few days and some fungal infection cream later, the smell was gone.

1:06:33My belly button was back to normal. Much to the sadness of my dog, who'd been robbed of his lovely yeasty smelling treat. He's always cuddly, but less excited now that he couldn't sniff the pong that was protruding from my belly. Anyway, because I've carried on with my classes and I can't help the sweat, these infections come and go periodically, much to the delight of my dog, who just can't get enough of that sweet stench. So now, before I attack the yeasty belly button with the fungal cream, I have a good old rummage with my finger and offer it to the dog for a sniff of the good yeast first.

1:07:07I've never seen the poor Barton's tail work as hard as when he gives it a good old chong. Like I'm offering up a sensory banquet. And he loves sitting on my stomach sniffing for a day, sniffing my belly for a day before it cleans up and goes away. I know that this is weird. It is. And fucking gross. and my husband literally gags when I started taking the piss out of mine and the dog's good yeast bonding time. But surely we can't help what smells good to us. And if it makes my pup happy, then who am I to rob that yeasty goodness from him? Apologies if this makes you want to vomit. I love the pod, you're amazing.

1:07:42And I always catch myself cackling like a madman every time I listen. Lots of love, yeasty in Yorkshire. That is rank. Can I just say, before you go to the gym, just put a bit of talcum powder in there. yes it soaks up the sweat or a bit more turn into like paste

1:07:59Anna Williamson:i was gonna say like wadging some cotton wool or something and then tape over it i mean deep is it how deep is your love is your love oh it's really icky i would like to say you have certainly made the weirdo of the week for me yeah that's the winner this doggy strong Long start to April. It is. You, Imo? Yeah, that one's weirder. I wouldn't like the thought of dunking my toothbrush in the water. No. But at least that's your own... I do have a deep belly button. Do you? Has it ever gone used to? No. Oh, it's like a breeding, festering hole in his body. I used to, like, when I'm on holiday and I'm on a...

1:08:45Oh, gosh. This is just due to my belly button. When I'm lying on the sun lounger, sometimes I get an ice cube from my drink and I put it in my belly button to cool me down. How big is your belly button? A whole ice cube's fitting and melting. Oh, yeah. And then you've got a swimming pool. And then you just get a pool of cool-ish water in your belly button. No? I love the fact. Just me? Any other belly button stories, please do send them in to us. We might have sparked a belly button era. Innies. The deep caverns.

1:09:22Anna Williamson:I had an ex-boyfriend that used to... Lick it out. No, nothing to do with mine. He used to put his finger in his sister's belly button. What? Yeah, it always made me feel a little bit awkward. I'm not going to lie. Oh, that's weird. Yeah. Yeah. No. That's weird, isn't it? That's odd. That's weird. I don't like that. How old was... Well, in their 20s. No, that's like the mum that got in the bath with the son the other week. Yeah, it's a bit weird, isn't it? In what context, though? That's weird. Like as an affection thing. So, oh, hey, sissy. Hey, sitting next to each other on the sofa and, like, fingering the button.

1:09:56Oh, no, no, no. Oh, no, something's gone wrong now.

1:09:58Anna Williamson:Yeah, it's wrong, isn't it? The wiring's not wired properly. Oh, please, it's not just me, because I felt very weird. Did you not say? Bit weird, mate. Yeah, I did. What did he say? I can't remember. It was a long time ago. 20 years ago. Plus. Yeah, weird. Weird. Weird. I love how these conversations just spark trauma from my past. I love to remember things. I know. And I want to let you know that I'm fucking starving and I'm not ranting. Unless you want to hear about how I'm starving. I've heard your belly going. I know. Is it going strong, is it? Well, we are going to go and eat. I'm hungry, so I'm done.

1:10:32Anna Williamson:I want a burrito. Oh, yummo, yummo. Guys, thank you for listening this week. We love you all. Don't forget, of course, we're back on Monday. You don't have to wait until then, because on Thursday it is, as you know now. Luanna Totally Extra it is your episode so we can't do it without you so send your emails in to Luanna at everythingluanna.com hop on to WhatsApp send a voice note a message whatever you want to share with us the number is 075-215-64648 listen to them not me please make sure you follow our podcast yeah and share it with a friend if you've got a belly button related trauma story if you're relating to anything we're talking to if we've made you laugh, send the clip, send them the advice, just share the love in general.

1:11:16Please give us a five-star rating and leave us a review. And don't worry, we'll be back on Thursday. See you then. Bye-bye. This has been a Global Player original production.