"I'm celebrating that he's died"

21:50Anna Williamson:I want to come out. Me kids and Alex were really looking forward to booking a holiday this year to come out and tie in. Maybe in October you can come. Well, that was what we were floating, to be honest. Oh, you'll be fine. Look, this will blow over. Well, let's hope you're manifesting that. I hope so. Well, we hope so. I think we are. Do you know what it is, Lou? Genuinely, and I think this is the problem. And I do. Best blow over. Best blow over. Listen, Iran, Trump and Netta, whatever your name is from Israel. Netting Yahoo. Fucking sort it out. What's he called? Netting Yahoo. Netting Yahoo.

22:19Netting Yahoo. He's not Yahooing anything. I think it's... He's Yahooing fucking Iran. He needs to stop Yahooing. And it must be for you too. It's the other... Fucking war hungry, illegal war man, whatever he's done. Brilliant.

22:32Anna Williamson:Illegal war man. Who is this man? I'm coming to newsagents soon. There it is. Hello! Right, you, you illegal war man. It is an illegal war man. Emily Maitlis has got to worry. They're always starting illegal wars. It's illegal. I'm sure it's illegal. Why does nobody hold that net and Yahoo accountable? It's not fucking Yahooing. I'm not Yahooing. I'm boohooing. You're going to boohoo. I'm boohooing Yahoo war man. Yeah. And that is as educational as I get on the whole thing. boohoo to Yahoo and fuck you nothing else to add and that's your fucking podcast other than other than can I just say that's probably the most poignant thing you've ever said and I loved it there you go there it is that's my opinion on the whole thing there it is I've boohooed all the way back to UK yeah Queen Carvania stood haloed by the morning sun an army hung on her every word My champions, I have sold my chariot on Carvana.

23:37It was a lovely SUV, an inexplicably queenly offer.

23:41Anna Williamson:They're even coming to the castle to collect it. Tonight, we feast. An offer you can feast on. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pickup fees may apply. Hey man, you hungry? Let's order delivery. Yeah, I was thinking... Italian. Burgers? Oh. Game night just got tense. Two bros on different sides of the fence. Burgers or pasta tonight. Why can't we have food without the fire? With Wonder, you can combine 20 restaurants in one delivery, so no one has to settle. Use code MEALTIME for 50 % off your first Wonder order. Terms apply. See wonder.com slash new customer. It's sport's greatest soap opera, And we've got your VIP pass to all the drama.

24:31Anna Williamson:This is Up to Speed, your new Formula One podcast. With me, Will Buxton, David Coulthard, Naomi Schiff and Jolie Sharp. Expect unfiltered race reactions, behind the scenes insight and blockbuster interviews. Plus answers to the questions you've always wanted to ask. Like, do F1 drivers pass their driving test first time? Spoiler, they don't. When the race weekend's over, we're here to keep you up to speed. Listen and watch today. Search Up To Speed on Global Player. Up To Speed.

25:09Anna Williamson:Right, it's now time for... It's the Reco-Secco, the Reco-Secco, it's the Reco-Secco. Right, Reco-Secco. Right, so this of course is the little sectionione-one, where we have a little recommendation for you. Can I just say, this has already taken off. people are loving the Recos and what did they say because my grape cutter went down well because on our Facebook group lots of people have been saying how much they've been enjoying it and then offering their own Recos as well so thank you guys I feel like I've not really seen anything I think because you've been on your algorithm you need to shift back onto this one so anyway so Recos so thanks guys lots of people over on the official Luana Facebook group are sharing loads of different recommendations which is lovely oh I need to steal something because I always struggle to think of some.

25:57Do you want to start us off? Yes, you start us off. Okay, this is actually a great show. I'm recommending a TV show. Nice. We should do like charades. Charades. Oh yeah. TV show. It's a TV show. Go on. Five words. Well, you can see it on the script. I can actually see it read, but this is good. Formula One, Drive to Survive. It is a brilliant show. Now, even if you're not into Formula One and all their cars. It's like, and I'm not really, I wouldn't like log into, log in, tune in or whatever to whatever channel does Formula 1, Channel 4 or BBC or whatever. I wouldn't really watch Formula 1 and I've never been to Formula 1 races.

26:39It doesn't really appeal to me very noisy. But I fucking love this show on Netflix. I think it's now in like its 8th series. Correct. Oh, is it? Get me. My A-dog is glued to this. It is such a brilliant show. It's a really super easy watch. It's very, very gripping. I love following all the stories, the heat between them. It's just a really well put together reality show. And I really do recommend it. And if you like binging, it is now in its eighth series. You can go back to season one. And it's just such a good show.

27:12Anna Williamson:I love that. Is this the one, because I saw recently when they were launching it, where, what's his name, Christian Thingy, Christian Warner, and he tells Jerry and she starts crying. Is that right? Yeah, she doesn't really like ball her eyes up. She just has a few tears. But it's a brilliant show and I really do recommend it. If you're like, you know, we've already talked about how heavy the news is. And if you just want to watch something that you don't need to focus on too much and kind of have on and if you're cooking and you're dipping in and out and the kids are running around, it's a really bloody good show.

27:42Anna Williamson:Well, love that reco. That's my reco. My husband would agree with that completely. He's obsessed. Very good. My reco for this week, I've gone culinary. What's the culinary? charade so my reco is turmeric shots now I know lots of people are into this it's not reinventing the wheel or anything from M &S again no not M &S this week although I'm loving M &S this is from a company called turmeric.co not an ad not a spot what you're ordering it yeah they're really good it's like a massive Alex and I have it comes in you know you can get that on a car day What, the turmeric.com? Yeah. Dot co? You can either get the small shots on Ocado or the big one.

28:25Oh, okay.

28:26Anna Williamson:That you can just pour out. Well, I like the little ones, but they're lovely. So they come with different, like, you know, obviously hormone support, recovery support, energy, whatever you want. But I've just recently got, I used to do turmeric years and years ago. Yeah. And then just forgot about it. You know all these sort of health crazes you sort of do for a bit and then you just sort of lose interest. Yeah, I'm a bit like fatty like that. Yeah, and you lose interest. I'm a fadder. Yeah, and then I recently got back in and these bloody hell, they take the roof of your mouth off because they are spicy.

28:53Anna Williamson:But I've just been really enjoying them. I pop them in the fridge. They're tiny little shot ones like that. And honestly, I've just been really enjoying them. And I don't know if it's placebo effect. You should look on a cardo. You might get them cheaper. I might be able to get them. Well, I don't know if it's placebo effect or not, but I really am feeling good about them. You are looking a bit orange turmeric coloured as well. That'll be the foundation. But yeah, so turmeric shots from turmeric.co. that's what I am rekoing this week just for general well-being I reckon we should start getting sponsors for this reko seco no because then it's bias it has to be unbiased this is always neutral and unbiased they haven't paid me to say that or anything if Formula One want to invite me to one of their things that would be fine by proxy no this has to be introduce me to like Lando Norris who's your fave I like George Russell and I like Lando and I like what's the Chinese not Chinese one called Yuki Sano Yuki.

29:45I think he's Japanese. Oh, well, okay, Japanese. Sorry, Yuki. Wasn't there another one, though, that was Japanese that was really angry? I really liked him. That's Yuki. Oh, it is. Yuki's calmed down because in previous series, he'd be driving. Don't talk to me. Shut up. Shut up. Fuck off. Oh, fucking love him. And he'd be yelling at them as he was driving along. And they'd be like, okay, Yuki, calm down. Pipe it down. Pipe it down. Yeah. And there's another really young one, and he's only 18. What's his name? Antonelli. Oh, he's... Kimmy Antoinette. Oh, he's so cute. He's 18. He's like a little boy.

30:20He is basically. And he's all overwhelmed with the pressure. And he's only 18. And I just wanted to mother him. But then he just pulls through. And he really starts getting stuck in. And he goes through this little mental block. And I just honestly. Love him. I love him. Well, I've got the phone, though,

30:42Anna Williamson:so I'm going to be watching this, clearly. You've got to watch it. It's such a good show. M.O. Recco. Mine is, basically, I've been listening to a book. Okay. Audible. An audible. Audible. Did you cancel it? Well, I haven't canceled that. I've got an update. I might tell you next week. Tell us next week. I've been listening to Giselle Pellico's book. Oh, bless you. Called A Hymn to Life. She wrote that quickly, didn't she? And it's, I think I would probably prefer to read it rather than this. It's interesting. Is she the voice? No, it's, what's her name? She doesn't speak English, does she? No, she does speak French.

31:26Anna Williamson:She is, what's it called? Narrated by actress Emma Thompson. Emma Thompson, yeah. Oh, really? Love her. What, from Harry Potter? Yeah. She is in Harry Potter. Am I thinking the right person? And Love Actually? Yeah. Emma Thompson? Yeah. Hermione. No, that's Emma Watson. Emma Thompson is also in Harry Potter, though. Emma Thompson. She's the one necklace one in Love Actually. Yeah, this one. The wife. That's right. Emma Thompson. Wait for my screen to catch up. Yes. Oh, it's narrated by her. She's wonderful. I'm really hungry. Oh. Yeah. She does very well, but I think I would have preferred to actually read it this time.

32:02Anna Williamson:But, you know, reading is reading. And it's just very powerful and very good. and I've read it off the back of I listened to a podcast by The Daily Podcast called The Interview The Woman at the Centre of the French Rape Trial That Shocked the World which is also a very fascinating listen it's basically an interview with Giselle and she's very open and upfront and honest and it's devastating She's done so many interviews hasn't she recently I mean that Victoria Derbyshire interview I cried I didn't see that. Absolutely, come on BBC. You can go back on BBC iPlayer. Oh yeah, you told me to watch that.

32:38Anna Williamson:I mean, that woman is something, just something else. And it's just very powerful. So I might listen to that. So what's the book called? The book is called, A Hymn to Life. A Hymn to Life. A Hymn to Life. A Hymn to Life. Buzz yourself. I wonder where they got that. She's just an incredibly strong woman and it's just amazing. The woman's just... Has she fallen out with her daughter? No. They've actually got back in touch recently. They've been repairing bridges. The way she spoke about her daughter in the interview was incredibly... Did he do it to the daughter as well? There's allegations and thoughts around that.

33:13Anna Williamson:Oh, okay. The way she spoke about it was, again, just so touching. And clearly she sort of said, she said, I'm very resilient. She has something on the lines of, quote, unquote, I have a different way of dealing with things, a different resilience, a different brain. My daughter is dealing with this in a different way. And she was really struggling. and as you say that for me was the saddest part that they had then obviously had conflict around it but I believe as you say yeah there's some reparation around those two which we can only hope very respectful of like everything so respectful and she's such an icon even the way she talks about him which she would be well within her right to absolutely just go ham it's just it's just quite respectful but she's with a woman of class Imo she's very classy she's just a woman of class you don't she is for me class personified with all that There is nothing more appalling that can happen to a human being that can happen to her.

34:04Anna Williamson:And you know what it is as well? She isn't lowering herself and lowering her standards and the way that she speaks or views things. And she's absolutely right. If you have all that level of anger and vitriol at someone, it's only affecting you. And for her to be able to come above all this and feel as she feels, but she is a classy, classy lady. She really is. She really is. So, yeah, that's my recommendation. Right, good recco. Thanks, Ibs. I feel like that was a good recco second. Great recco. we've had a book a product and a TV show love all three fantastic good across the book bold right guys now something for something super exciting because we are running a bit of a competition a bit of a compo guys for you and a friend compo face little yes you can come and join us at our Luana the big party now the party's happening of course October the 3rd at the Troxie in East London we've got two parties we are sold out bitches two parties one day it is sold out and the only way well I think there might be a spattering but to get a smattering not a spattering oh I like spattering that'll do spatter it's like a spunk spatter spunk spatter tickets but listen you don't need to buy them because you could get free tickets you could be in with a chance to win for you and your friend you can grab a drink with us before the show and we never do that guys with anyone literally only you two will be allowed to come and have a little little Negroni I'll bring you my cocktail I'll bring you an Edmunds cocktail I'll bring a few little little cockies little cockies for your chance to win two tickets to join us at the big party it's the evening show on Saturday the 3rd of October 2026 it is at the Troxy in London all you need to do is text PARTY to 82200 that is spelled if you don't know how to spell party it's P-A-R-T-Y to 82200 we are also even throwing in an overnight stay at a swanky London hotel.

35:59And on top of that, 150 quid towards your travel costs. So every base is covered. You can just have a brilliant evening on us. Basically, yeah, it's a free lunch.

36:09Anna Williamson:Free night out on us with everything. So here's the really fab part, which we particularly love about this. You'll have the chance to make a voluntary£5 donation as well, which will be added to your phone bill. 100 % of that goes to Globals Make Some Noise. It's an amazing charity. I'm sure you've heard about it loads. doing incredible work across the UK. Now, you've got until 5pm on Friday the 27th of March to enter and then you'll need to keep your phone very handy because you might be getting that very exciting phone call. Standard network rates apply. You must be 80 and over to enter for full T's and C's including price date restrictions.

36:42Anna Williamson:Visit makesomenoise.com slash win. So text what, Lou? Party! To 82200. Good luck. Hey, man, you hungry? Let's order delivery. Yeah, I was thinking... Italian. Burgers? Oh. Game night just got tense. Two bros on different sides of the fence. Burgers or pasta tonight. Why can't we have food without the fire? With Wonder, you can combine 20 restaurants in one delivery, so no one has to settle. Use code MEALTIME for 50 % off your first Wonder order. Terms apply. See wonder.com slash new customer. Right, messages. What we got? Ziss Bowls? Right. we've got an update we love an update this message is coming from zelda she says hi girlies love love love to you all wanted to write in with an update yes zelda she says well not exactly an update but mostly just a huge thank you i wrote into the pod asking for your advice on my shitty relationship in october 2023 oh damn well i'm not sure i'll remember this one zelda but she says i was 12 weeks pregnant and my whole world had just collapsed as i found out yet again that my partner had been consistently lying to me in a big way now i'm here in feb 2026 i'm sat in the car whilst my amazing satty little bestie my 22 month old daughter is napping and i'm getting 45 minutes apiece for the day for a while i've been thinking about listening back to what i wrote to you in 2023 and the advice you gave so today was that day uh she's saying that so this episode guys was It's on the 30th of October, 2023.

38:20And if you want to go and listen back, it's from Zelda. Listen back! So having heard my story, you guys told me that if you were in my situation, you would leave him. The trust has been broken. It's going to be very hard to repair our relationship. At the time, despite asking for it, I didn't like hearing your advice. And I didn't want to admit that that was the reality of my life. I didn't leave him. I stayed. He loved on me again and again. Promised me the world. When our daughter was 10 months old, I did leave. after he showed me yet again who he is a narcissistic, lying cheater so on so on this time he had a huge gambling addiction Christ on a bike to the tune of£250 ,000 he lied to me 4 million times just as he had since the moment I laid eyes on him I know this time is different as he had an addiction and that makes everything so much more complicated and it wasn't him but me and my daughter do not need this chaos and instability for me it was the cherry on the cake of this shit show.

39:18Honestly, at times, it feels like my life is not my own. It's like a soap opera. Anyway, finally, I am out. It has been the hardest and most heartbreaking time of my life. The time I dreamt of my whole life with like being a partner, my mom has been destroyed, ruined by the man who was supposed to love and respect me. Throughout it all, my little girl has been my rock. The joy she brings me is unthinkable and she really has saved me. anyway the reason I'm telling you this is that listening back to where I was back at in October 23 being able to remember what happened and what I went through is like a diary entry and now I'm out of it it's been so refreshing listening to Louisa telling me sorry guys I've got really annoying throat today not me for once listening to Louisa telling me that she believes that everything happens for a reason and it will work out and whilst you're in it you can't see the wood for the trees but it does get better back then it didn't make sense to me but now it does Anna reassuring me that it's not me that's the issue that I can't carry the guilt of splitting the family up something that for two years I've truly believed I feel like listening back to that episode has given me closure it's confirmed what I know to be morally right and honestly it's been like therapy to me I didn't see it at the time but thank you thank you thank you the community you've created is just as special and you truly have felt like the friends I've needed over the past four years.

40:38I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart. Keep doing what you're doing. I love you, girls.

40:43Anna Williamson:Oh, that is so lovely. Thank you. And look, it took years to leave him and realise that. But really everything does happen for a reason and it does always work out. And it really isn't a you problem. Like, it really isn't. I'm also delighted. I was thinking, shit, shit, what advice did we give her? What's she going to say? It was great advice. Well done. And I think that's hope for many people. It takes time. And thank you for the update. Do you know what? There's often messages that play on my mind. There was one from a girl that was in a domestically abusive relationship. It's always the DV ones, isn't it, in particular?

41:15And we never had an update. It makes me really sad.

41:18Anna Williamson:Please always come back to us because we do genuinely love and care about you guys. And we think about, I think about things sometimes when it comes in. And I'm like, I wonder what happened to that person. I do as well. Even if you don't. Maybe we should email them. Even on the Facebook page. It was like, please don't give me any more. No, we're admin. But no, we do genuinely care, guys. So thank you. and thank you for that lovely message message from anonymous so Freya slash Brandy Limbeck hi Luanna I have a massive beautiful problem and I need to know what to do she's going to talk about dick isn't she a massive schlong maybe who knows I'm going to laugh because this is like a really serious one it's like me with the offering someone a candle as a prize when their house burnt down brilliant Anna please call me Freya or by my porn name Brandy Limbeck pet and street name.

42:05Anna Williamson:I didn't get it. Brandy Limbeck, yeah. Your pet and your street name. So Brandy is her pet and Limbeck is the street she lives on. Oh my God, I can hear my stomach. Yeah. What's your porn name? So Pet, my name is Teddy Street. Well, I got told that you're not meant to actually say that because apparently it used to be like a way for people to try and work out what your passwords were to stuff because they're things that people often use as passwords. Oh, thank God. I actually do not use that. Yes, I use that as my password. They can use that because I don't oh but that's a good point that is actually like really good that probably is yeah so people used to come up with Al what's your pawn name to be like what's your password because mine would be crumble jasmine because like a lot of that's quite nice a lot of things are like when you're trying to get through to people actually that's a lie like um the questions they ask to get through like password controls it's like what's your mother's maiden name of course it is mother maiden name yes you're right actually you're right am I busted Well, mine's not, but actually Jasmine's life don't live in Jasmine.

43:06I live in silk. Silk. Pardon me? Silk. Silk. Silk leaf. So mine would be crumble silk leaf. It's quite porny. Silky. Silky.

43:18Anna Williamson:Silky smooth. Anyway, we'll move on to this. So, love the pod and all that jazz. You have no idea what you guys do for my mental health. I freaking love everything that you do. Anyway, on to the issue. Names have been changed. So four months ago, I left my husband at 23 years. I wanted to leave three years ago, but I let it unhappily drag on for various reasons, like you do. Yeah, we know. No kids are involved. By the time I left, I was no longer in love with him. I didn't trust or respect him anymore and was very much ready for the relationship to be over. After I left, I went to stay with my friend of 10 years, Becca, as far away from him as possible in Devon.

43:52Anna Williamson:When I arrived, lovely, there she is. When I arrived, I was sad and hurt and spent a lot of my time in my head dealing with a multitude of feelings and emotions. Basically, I wasn't in a good place. My ex was being very difficult about the breakup, refusing to believe it was over and waiting for me to come back. In the meantime, I was just happy to be away from him and figuring out how I felt without the pressure of him being there. Oh, it stinks, Lou. Does it? Yeah. Amidst the guilt. Oh, that's proper guff. I'm really hungry. Amidst the guilt, the fear, the anxiety, I felt free. I felt relieved and I felt strong and determined.

44:25Anna Williamson:Yes, girl. And I knew I was never going to go back to him. After a couple of months, I started to feel like myself again. I was seeing my friends, doing Pilates, strength conditioning training and lots of walking with my dog. Dog is the best. Yay! I was and am feeling good about myself. This whole time, Becca was there being a wonderful friend, mostly listening to me vent and making sure I was looking after myself. We walk our dogs, we go out to eat, visit our other friends, cook and dance in the kitchen with a chica glass of vino. We have a little cuddle on the sofa in the evenings while watching some telly.

44:52Anna Williamson:She's turned lesbo. Well, maybe. It's been fun living with her and it's really helped me get through this breakup. I always knew she was an amazing human, but living with a person means you get to see the good, the bad and the bits in between. She's fallen for Becca. I was finding out I had loads more in common with her than I ever knew. This is what would happen to us. Who, you and me? We'd become lesbian. We would start licking the nun on each other. Not just in things that we like, but we have similar values, are both very kind, hardworking, empathetic and open-minded. This is an advert for becoming a lesbian.

45:28Well, this is easy. It's what I've always said, guys.

45:30Anna Williamson:Basically, guys. Makes sense. Lou, I think, is now hitting on me. I just think it makes sense, women being with women. She's making... You're on the same fucking wavelength. The answer is, yes, I accept. I will be your girlfriend. She cleans up our... Imagine that. What a twist in fucking Luanna. I couldn't cope with the hypercontract. Could you imagine, though? Yeah, but like a girlfriend and girlfriend, but after all this time. Imagine the headline now, we've fallen in love. You've fallen in love. From work wives to real wives. That would be... It could be... I actually... Honestly, this makes sense.

46:02Anna Williamson:It does make sense. Oh, my God. I say this. If I divorce Alex, I can't be bothered to find another man. Oh, no. Oh, too annoying. Also, you just get a little, you know, vibrator or whatever, you know. Anyway, she cleans up after herself. She doesn't stink the place up. She doesn't stink. Exactly. She's thoughtful, respectful, easygoing. I bet she doesn't skid mark the toilet. I left this morning to a massive skitter. It wasn't my husband. He knows better than that. It was my son. No, it wasn't. He knows that. And also, women, they changed the toilet roll. Yes. I was at work the day at Slevesco Dating and I'm mum in there.

46:37Anna Williamson:The lads, seats are up. No one changes the bog roll. I do all that. Women do that. She's the perfect housemate. Anyway, here's where it gets a little complicated. Oh. Oh, she's already a lesbian, Becca. Here's the juice. Here's the vag juice. Becca is a big flirt, as am I. She's also a lesbian. I've fallen for this woman. Hook, line and sinker. She makes me feel like no other human on earth has ever made me feel. I honestly thought I had dried up like a menopausal old prune. But I can confirm I have never been wetter. Thanks for the clarification. I fancy the pants off her. I'm in a constant state of arousal.

47:16Anna Williamson:I get butterflies thinking about her when I'm not with her. The noon is pulsating. I'm literally ready to completely blow up my life and send a text to my family that says, I'm a lesbian now. This is my girlfriend. Deal with it. I'm finally figuring out who I am after spending my whole life being the version of myself everybody else wanted me to be. The real problem is it's been four months since I left my husband. Just four months. The divorce papers are signed, but the ink is not yet dry. I spoke to the other friend, another friend, Chloe, about it. And she thinks I'm vulnerable and rushing into things.

47:45Anna Williamson:I just say, lick that vag and have a good time. I finally know what I want and I want Becca and she wants me. We've spoken at length about it and we realised this has happened very organically. No one was looking for anything. We were just friends, had a laugh, got to know each other without the pressure of a romantic relationship and somehow along the way we fell for each other. We haven't done anything other than cuddles. I'm not going to lie, some of the cuddles would be considered highly inappropriate but no kissing or sex has been allowed. How do you have an inappropriate cuddle without kissing?

48:14Boob grope. Or dry humping. What is that? I don't know. Naked cuddles? Yeah, what's it?

48:20Anna Williamson:I don't know. But I so want to go further. Oof. The things that go through my mind makes my toes curl. I am so far gone. So what should I do? I'm still married. I have the marital home and assets to divide. Do I wait for divorce to go through? I don't think I can wait that long. Don't wait. I'm going to self-combust. Would it be deemed an affair? Is it a phase as suggested by Chloe? Am I infatuated? Can't you? Again, thanks for that, Chloe. It feels very real to me. My head tells me it's too soon. Are you going to have your first lesbian relationship with your friend? I mean, this could mess up a whole group of friends if it doesn't go well.

48:54Anna Williamson:Am I going to get my heart broken? Is she? So many questions. My heart says I adore everything about this woman and I see her in my future, meeting my family, planning her life and having sex for days. I know I'm not going to give this up because I've never felt anything like it. I just think maybe Chloe's right and we should wait before going any further. I have admin baggage, if you like, that I don't want people to think I'm a vulnerable woman that's been picked off by her lesbian friend. nor do I want them to think she's some kind of predator that took advantage of me because that's so far from the truth we flirted up this storm together and I'm not going to let her take the fall for it I want to be in her life but is it too soon do we keep it from everyone and just do our thing until other people are ready to hear it do I move out it's not like I can switch my feelings off what do you think Freya Freya that is a great hang on here we go eek she says this is an update we kissed sorry this note is now a week later oh my god it was everything it was the hottest kiss I've ever had in my life absolute fire I want to do it again and again.

49:46Anna Williamson:Now what? Have I messed this up? Oh my God, Freya, you really are an overthinker. I think you just fucking get down on your knees and start licking the vag. I mean, come on, just get on with it. I don't think all these questions need to matter and all these people you're thinking about. You've got a feeling, she's got a feeling, ride the feelings and go with it. And stop stressing about it. Get out the double ender, have a great time, enjoy each other's company. Go for some pub lunches and see where it goes. You don't need to announce anything to anyone. You don't need to justify anything to anyone.

50:22Go with your feelings. You're two grown adults that are consenting and you're not having an affair. Your marriage is finished. Crack on, love.

50:31Anna Williamson:Also, even so, what if it is a fling? So what if it is a phase? I think, to lose point there, my first thing was going to say, you don't need to justify this to anyone. In fact, you know what? I wouldn't. I wouldn't have even told Chloe. You know why? because it is nothing more delicious and juicy than, well, no, not even scandal. It's not even scandal. It's not scandal, but just delicious about having that little secret to yourselves of making, you know, having that wonderful feeling. Yes. But you are fresh out of a divorce, but you know what? Let's say it could be rebound. Just because people are freshly divorced doesn't mean you can't shag someone.

51:02Anna Williamson:You might be a lesbian. You might be bisexual. It might be a phase, and you might be completely heterosexual. You might be pansexual. Who knows who cares? What is a pansexual? Someone that's attracted. It's not about gender. Yeah. You're just attracted to the person. Maybe I'm a pansexual. Do you just fancy the person? Or are you interested in it? Doesn't everyone just fancy the person? No. Some people don't fancy women if they're not gay. Some people just fancy the person, not about the enough thing. Well, I just think if you've got a connection with someone, then you've got a connection with them.

51:36I'm on board with that. So I think that is pansexual. Yeah, that is pansexual. So we are all pansexual.

51:43Anna Williamson:I would probably, yeah. I would say I probably could fit into that category for sure. I have definitely, I've definitely genuinely fancied women. Like genuinely fancied women. And it's nothing to do with the fact that they have a, I don't think everybody does. Do you think that some people are just out and out like, no, I won't consider because you're female. Yeah. Absolutely. So they wouldn't even. Allow themselves. what if they really like like say what but i don't get that because what if it was like you're just chatting someone and you really like them and then you're like oh i feel it this way do people just not get that then i think they just like i mean i've spoken to people who are like i know i'm straight because i wish i wasn't yeah like what does that mean because they're like yeah things haven't gone well in the past with them with men and they're like i i can see the attraction of being with women I think that women are gorgeous but like it's just it doesn't do anything for me no but also you can change your mind I mean we've got celebs at the moment on the show that have literally just changed their mind as life has gone on at some point they've found themselves attracted to one gender I just feel like if you like got a connection with someone you've got a connection and see where that goes but that's yeah but I just didn't realise other people didn't feel that way and they'd be like shut off to the fact because that person was the same gender.

53:04No, I've got male friends who are heterosexual

53:06Anna Williamson:and they absolutely, even if they had a connection to another man, they wouldn't ever want to explore it sexually because they don't identify as someone, they're heterosexual but they can have a connection. So my point being on this and I think this is what is so exciting about sexuality to be honest is that you really can do whatever you feel and if you're feeling it for your woman, your friend, go for it. Your pussy is blowing up, just go for it. Yeah, I think, why not? Go for the Punani explosion. It sounds like she knows everything you're going through as well. Niagara Falls is incoming! She knows everything you're going through with your divorce as well.

53:44Anna Williamson:So it's not like you're kind of, you know, mugging her. Do you know what? If it doesn't work out, you've had a great little fling. Good luck to you, Freya. Stop overthinking it. Give it a go, my love. Good luck. Let's know how it pans out. Let's know what the sex is like. I'm dying to know. Right, we've got another message in from and on. So Tash Marbles. Tashmables Tashmables Tashmables Brilliant Get it Hey Luanna, Imo I'm Bex I have an embarrassing story to share with you that will hopefully give you some shits and gigs Please keep me in on over to you Imo for the fab name Wasn't that fab because it didn't make us laugh Sorry How rude I work in quite a high profile corporate job I'm on the client side and was visiting one of our accounts The relationship manager met me at reception we said our hellos and got into the lift to go to the meeting room.

54:33The lady gets out of the busy lift, which I followed. She reached her arms out wide and I assumed she was doing so to give me a cuddle. A little odd, I thought, as we had already said our hellos. But sure, I'll give her a hug and I wrap my arms around her. We haven't seen one another in a while and we always had a fairly friendly relationship. Well, she wasn't reaching out her arms for a warm embrace. She was directing some of the people getting out the busy lift. once I realised instead of embarrassingly shrugging it off and going back into the lift to the floor we were supposed to get off, the first thing that came into my mind is to say, giz a kiss, and I proceeded to kiss her on the cheek in some attempt to pass off awkwardness.

55:14Although, in hindsight, I'm not sure where my head was going with that thought process. To make matters even more awkward, when we got to the meeting room, there were more colleagues waiting to greet me. Usually a handshake and a hello would be how I dealt with the interaction, but not this time. Oh, no. I kissed every person on the cheek to make it not seem weird that I just kissed the lady on the cheek, as if I'd suddenly turned European. And kissing is how I greet people now. I love this commitment. I could feel the people wince as they went with it. Presumably. Pulling away. As I'm the client.

55:52Even when I think of it now, I want the world to swallow me whole. Hope that made you ladies smile.

55:57Anna Williamson:I love this commitment and it reminds me of something that I did. It doesn't often make me cringe. I got out of a car the other day, a cab the other day, and do you ever have done this? As I got out, I was like, thank you. He was a nice man. And I've been chatting to him a bit. I was like, lovely, nice to see you. Yeah, take care. Yeah, love you. And I was like, oh, God. And then he actually looked at me. I went, yeah, thank you. Have a great day. Love you. He went, okay. I moved out. and I was like, such a dick thing to say. So awkward. So awkward. Oh, brilliant. Remember, if you want to get in touch, you can email us, Luana at everythingluana.com.

56:34You can also drop us a while on 07521564640.

56:43Anna Williamson:We've nailed that. Nailed. There was one note out, but that's going to be fine. Right, now newsy bits. I think this is good news. Ian Huntley is dead. He is. So, yeah, Ian Huntley, the Soham Killer. I'm laughing at Beck's reaction outside the door. What? To what bit? He's dead. He's carked it. He's been attacked by another inmate in prison. He's 52 now. Well, not anymore because he's dead, but he was 52. He was left fighting for his life. He was attacked on 26th of Feb, left in a serious condition. he ended up being knocked unconscious by a metal pole and this dude who finished him off was shouting I've done it!

57:29It left him touched and go. I think he had a lot of head injuries. He was left blind on life support and now he's died because we've switched him off. And it was his mum. I don't think they donated his organs. No one would want them, would they? I don't think. Would you take an organ? This is a good thing from someone like Ian Huntley who famously... What a question. killed um holly wells and jessica chapman and jessica chapman bless their little hearts it was awful and the way that he you know he killed them he knew they were dead and then he was given police interviews vile vile human being and we are celebrating i am anyway that he's died because we're no longer paying to keep him alive in prison i don't think there's anybody that's unhappy about the fact that he has would you take if they said right we're going to donate the organs and it's from Ian Huntley, and your life depended on having that heart, would you want that heart?

58:21I don't think the organ is evil. I do.

58:24Anna Williamson:Well, I wouldn't have a brain transplant with him. Do you know what? It was like a liver. I know what you mean. If someone was to say my dad was going to die unless they had Ian Huntley's liver, then I would be like, yeah, okay. Yeah, take it. But I do think it's a good question. Oh, I don't know. It gives me the air. Do you have, exactly, there is that sort of moral association with somebody that is so inherently evil. I mean, look, yeah, Ian Huntley, absolutely despicable man that killed those poor little girls. Not actually that far from where I live. I think we all remember it. I know, it was so bad.

58:58Anna Williamson:And he had been attacked several times in jail already. He'd had his throat slashed several years ago. He had a rough ride. And rightly so, after what those little girls went through. To be honest, it was about time he got caught. Why don't we just kill them all? Well, I think what's also, well, there is a lot of debate around that, you know, about death penalty, what's the point in keeping people alive that shouldn't be here, especially when they've committed a penis crisis. Well, his daughter said he really shouldn't have the dignity of a funeral and grave. This is his daughter, Samantha, who I feel desperately sorry for.

59:30Anna Williamson:She's 27. The poor young lady as well also has a very big likeness to her father. Does she? She does, yeah. Well, she looks like them. She does, yeah. She goes on to say funerals are supposed to be about celebrating someone's life and there's nothing about him to celebrate. It takes up people's valuable time. He's not worth it. We should flush his ashes down the loo. And the same sentiments were echoed by her mother who added he didn't deserve the dignity of a grave. And she said I cannot get out of my head what he did to Holly and Jessica. Yeah, it's awful. Left them in a ditch. For that reason, why should he be given the dignity of a grave?

1:00:03Anna Williamson:I don't think he deserves a resting place. A Christian burial is for good people and he's the devil. He's evil. I know he's going to burn in hell. How old would Holly and Jessica have been now? A bit back in their 30s. They'd be, I think, a year or two, a year older than me. So they'd be like 34, 35. They'd have their own families now. So his own daughter's not that much younger than what they would have been. No. And I think... I didn't know he had a daughter. Yeah, I remember at the time it happened. And I feel so desperately sorry for her. And we've talked about this. Remember the Netflix documentary Rose Red West?

1:00:37Anna Williamson:And their son, who featured in that documentary, seemed like a really nice guy. and to carry the facial similarities to someone so besmirched in evil. I just feel so sorry for her. It's awful. The families of Holly and Jessica, you can only imagine how they must feel. Maybe some sort of vindication. Well, you would, wouldn't you? You'd be finally like, yes, that was what he did. Ding dong, the witch is dead. And he did suffer. He did. He did suffer. And it also seems like, having read about it, He suffered quite a lot of the whole prison sentence. Oh, he was a target. Being flash-beaten up. Yeah, well, he's a child killer.

1:01:16He wouldn't have had any friends, because who'd want to be friends with? Well, maybe they all stick together, child killers. I'm interested... I mean, it does raise questions. What is the point in keeping these people alive? I mean, they're just a drain on society. And it's just like, why? Why bother? I don't believe they can be fixed.

1:01:33Anna Williamson:The amount of money that has gone into, obviously, yeah. The trials, the police, the protection. like like the amount of it's not just the prison and and the keeping him alive and that it's like all of the justice system before it is just pointless but then part of me is like i'm wants to see death isn't the easy way out but part of me is i'm like you should be you should be punished yeah you should be punished like that annoys me when i mean this is not it but like in like tv shows and stuff when people are awful people and then they just get like shot by the police or whatever and die and i'm like but well it's when people need to suffer when people commit suicide like old bloody epstein you know when people as you say get off the hook in inverted commas by not and as you say these these little girls got killed and put in a debt ditch you know and he and he was then in prison you know all that time as well as you say it was a sitting duck the whole time he was targeted the whole time and you know what good riddance to bad rubbish i mean nobody is thank goodness sort of glorifying the man that killed him who's now thinking like because let's not forget the man who killed him is a murderer or a rapist but at the same time I do think obviously people are thinking well look you know what you're all bad you're all in there you're all bad in there you know dog eat dog world and Huntley got what was coming to him yeah he did it's very and you know someone said something which I thought was very point I know we're talking about today on the pod but someone said you know what now he's dead we should now never speak of his name and I think that after this now he should never be spoken of and be put back into the history books and you know be done Right, next news story.

1:03:08They're women, they're twins called Singh and Sui. Oh, this is brilliant.

1:03:13Anna Williamson:They're men. Right, sorry. Singh and Sui from Thailand. They are dating the same woman, Nong Phah. Nong Phah. What a brilliant name. Brilliant name. Nong Phah. Nong Phah. So 24-year-old waitress in Thailand. She's been dating both of them for six months after they boasted the numbers. Now, they're all consensual in this. Everyone's in the same boat. And now to the point, Lou, they are all living in the same house. They are in an official thruple. No. She, talk about have your cake and eat it, lovely lady. She said that she was texting them both. She just couldn't choose between them. And, yeah, she said we've developed a romantic relationship.

1:03:56I'm close to both of them and I love both of them. They didn't argue over her. They didn't get jealous. Jealousy.

1:04:02Anna Williamson:But I would think, because I know quite a few identical twins. I've never asked them if they've done this. But I could imagine it's probably everyone's happy. They all share a bed. Yeah. A big bed. Do they have a threesome, I wonder? They also have put her in charge of the finances. Right. And she sleeps between the two of them. That's crazy. So when asked why they live together as a threesome, one of the twins said, because we love each other. And the families have accepted it. So everybody's happy. She posts on TikTok documenting their relationship. And obviously they are earning money now from TikTok because 8 million views on some of their videos.

1:04:44And that is that. They're a happy throuple.

1:04:46Anna Williamson:Do we think there's incest there? Well, that's what I was going to say. Polyamory is perfectly reasonable and there's a lot of it going on now. It's very trendy. I wonder if they're like DP-ing her in like their willies touch. Ew. Is that classed as incest? I'd say it's borderline. I would say, I'm hoping the boys are keeping themselves to themselves. Yeah. Let me tell you, Nong is living her best life right now with both of her lads. Nong is like loving double dick twin. She's there. Twin love. I wonder if their dicks are the same. I'd like to see. Oh, my God. We should ask Ben this. Our identical twin friend.

1:05:23One second. I'm going to ask. That would be useful to know. Do you have the same dick as your... As your twin. Urgent. Yeah, urgent. For the pod.

1:05:35Anna Williamson:That would be useful to know. Please reply. I've gone down a hole in my brain now. Surely they would be quite similar. Well, you'd think so, wouldn't you? You'd be very fucked off if they were very different, wouldn't you? And one was like gigantic and one was tiny. So I'm just having that sort of, I'm going down a massive, and maybe it's only twins here, identical twins that are listening. I'm thinking about twin girls. Do you start your periods like at the same time? Like on the same day or within the same month? Like, I'm now really curious. Like, do you have, like, the same boob sizes? I'm sure.

1:06:07Anna Williamson:I don't know. Now that's really interested me. Right, I've asked Ben. I want to know more twin chat. I'm like, when I was younger, I was obsessed with twins. It's such a fantasy, though, isn't it? I really wanted twins. Oh, give birth to twins. I really wanted twins so desperately. It is. I think twins are just twins. We've got two sets of identical twins in the school at the moment. Have you? Yeah. and they're just so cute when they're little ones as well. They're in the younger years. Oh, that's too much. Oh, and there's identical twin girls and identical twin boys. Oh, the girls are cute. They literally, they've got their little piggy tails.

1:06:41Anna Williamson:Oh, stop it. And their mum, I'm like, she just nails it as well with them. I'm like, you're just, but they're automatically a talking point. Like you just, twin mums and triplet mums, you must just feel like a celebrity everywhere you walk because everyone's fascinated with your kids. Yeah, when I started secondary school, there were triplets in my year. Oh. And there were like three forms. Identical. Yeah. There were three forms in the year and they separated them. So we had one triplet in each class. To give them a little bit of independence. And I just found it fascinating. I'd never known triplets before.

1:07:13Anna Williamson:It's so interesting. Oh, actually. Yeah, Charlotte. I haven't seen anything about them on Instagram for ages. Weirdly, I saw something on my algorithm kicked in and she'd reposted a throwback photo. This is triplet mum, by the way, on Instagram. and it was when the babies were newborns and she was sharing a feeding routine and I was like, man, that was a military operation. How old are they? I don't know. She never pops up. I find living in Dubai now, like, things don't pop up. Different algorithms.

1:07:43Anyway, right, well, that was weird, but let's see if you guys are weirder. It's time for... It's the Widow of the Weeca.

1:07:51Anna Williamson:Right, first up, anonymous, so stubby leak. Hi, Luanamo. I believe I'm a super strong contender for Weirder of the Week. Please keep me a nun. Soon to be, for obvious reasons, call me by my shit porn star named Stubby Leak. If I'm about to sleep with someone, an anal is possible, possibly on the cards. She goes deep, actually. Assuming this is a woman. After pushing as much poop out as possible and washing the area, I stick a finger in to make sure the rim and any tongue accessible areas are clean, but to also shove off me to shove any nuggets of shit. I couldn't squeeze out as far back up my inside me as I can.

1:08:30No, those nuggets are going to come out. Trust me. Yeah, Lou knows.

1:08:34Anna Williamson:Whether they stay there or not, I actually have no idea. I can't surely be the only person to do this, but probably the only person to admit it. Also, why don't you just double douche you ask? Well, can I be F? No. And you know what? The fellas know where they're exploring. It's on them at that stage if they get shit on the dick. I can't decide if it's considerate or inconsiderate but I'd say accidents happen only 3 % of the time 3 % very specific good risk analysis 97 % success rate this dude so I'm going to stick with it thank you for doing what you do you are welcome Stubby well thank you Stubby for doing what you do as well for pushing those propose back the men are thanking him 97 % success cha-ching right Sam says hi ladies love you all live in Australia and I've been a listener for two or so years now and my sister who lives in Dubai also listens.

1:09:23We crack up together at the hilarious and disgusting stories that come through You've made both my matte leaves so much fun and make me feel like I'm hanging out with my besties and staying up late with the le hot goss, with all the hot goss I have a weirder of the week contribution. Every time I clean my husband's

1:09:42Anna Williamson:smudgy poo streaks from the toilet with the toilet brush I look this is actually making me feel sick I look at the bottom of the toilet brush holder to see the filthy poo oh the poo water and all the little floaty bits in it and I imagine just I don't even want to hear the rest of this I've just come straight off the back of cleaning Enzo's skidders I don't want to hear this this is fucked up and I imagine just picking it up and gulping it down in one big swig why do I think this? Why? It's enough to make me gag but I can't help imagine it. It makes me think of jackass when they would drink their own vomit or eat revolting stuff but why did they never do the toilet brush water thing?

1:10:30It's probably one of the most disgusting things a human could do especially because the majority

1:10:37She's vomiting. The floating feces belongs to my husband. Just thought I'd share that Sam from Down Under. Thanks Sam. Also recently after a few drinks with my friend who doesn't listen I told him this story and he just stared at me confused with disgust why I was talking about this. Doesn't quite have the same effect when you just randomly talk about weird intrusive thoughts that pop up in your head. Can I just say, that is,

1:11:00Anna Williamson:you know how we do the weirdo of the month? That's the winner. That's on course for the weirdo of the year. That's vile. So I'm assuming they've won, Sam. Yes. Oh, for sure. I actually can't even remember what the first one was now. Me too. Poking the poo back up the vine. Oh, no. That's fine. That's highly relatable. That's highly relatable, the nuggets. Downing skiddy toilet water is rank. She's not done it. She's just imagining it. But that's still weird. Intrusive thoughts. I get intrusive thoughts, but it's still weird. I don't get intrusive thoughts like that. Not that. I can't relate to that.

1:11:32Anna Williamson:It's still weird. But next time you look at a toilet brush, that's what you're going to be thinking. I'm thinking about it now. Well, disgusting skiddy toilet brush is by far the weirdo of the week. That's rank. Right, it's that time of the week where Zisballs has a little ranty poos or a happy moment. What's it going to be today, babes? Well, I am going to rant. Go for it. And this is not going to land well. Why? Well, because all this eco bullshit everybody's into, fucking cano water. Right, we've come into Global this morning. Cano water, it's still water in a can. It's just not right. It doesn't feel right.

1:12:07I don't like it. It's not fizzy.

1:12:09Anna Williamson:It's weird when something still comes out of a can. I could have given you sparkling. Oh, no, I like it. Oh, well, I would have had sparkling. Oh, the next one you can have sparkling. Anyway, I don't like it. I understand that they're trying to be eco-friendly and all that bullshit. What's the rant, though? No, I don't like it. The can. The can and the water. It's not for me, okay? I don't care. I'm not an eco-warrior today with this. Okay. It's not for me. Firstly, water that you can't put the lid back on and put in my bag and carry on. I don't want to drink a whole can of water in one go. I would drink a whole can of Diet Coke in one go wouldn't you?

1:12:49yes you don't pick up a can of Coke and try and put that in your bag you want to bottle the water and keep the bottle in your bag but oh no the cano water in the can says don't bottle it so what am I meant to do? just carry an open can of water around it doesn't feel right I don't like it it's not going with my feng shui whatever it doesn't fit in my bag also the can feels cheap and nasty and the water tastes different. Right. It's nothing against the actual brand can of water.

1:13:18Anna Williamson:It's just the concept. It is. Of water in a can. Right, okay. You know what we could do? Any brand of water. We just don't like water in a can. I don't like. Do you like it, Emma? Be honest. No. Exactly. I'm not crazy about it, no. Well, thank you. But you know what we... Thank you, can of water and any other canned water companies. I don't mind it if it's fizzy. I'm not enjoying this. Do you know what I think's better? Is if we are being eco-friendly. Oh, she's crutching up. Don't do it so much. So it'll leak. Right, there we go. See how that is just, now it's leaking everywhere. It looks like a GCSE art project now.

1:14:02The can is so cheap, a little bit of scrunching, and now the fucking water's leaking. Well, so that defies the point, doesn't it? Leaky can of water. Can can't hold up to it. Can it? Can't. It's a canto water. It's a canto cano water. It's a canto water. It's actually a canto c***y water and I'm done with it. And that is it for this week's podcast. Well done. But you don't have to wait until you're next. No, I've got no water. No, she's leaking all over the table and I'm thirsty. You know what you need to do?

1:14:30Anna Williamson:Go and get the water cooler and go and get a little cup. I don't want a cup. Go and get a cup. I don't care. I want water from a bottle. Go and get your keep cup. Look, it's leaking. Emma's had to chuck it. She needs to get a keep cup and the water cooler. Right, we'll be back on Monday, guys. Don't have to wait until then, though, because Thursday we've got Luanna totally extra. But, guys, we need you. You, you beautiful Lufanians. I want to see if Ben's responding to my dick. Please send in your emails to Luanna at everythingluanna.com. You can jump onto WhatsApp. You can send us a voice note or a message.

1:14:58Anna Williamson:Our number is 07521564640. We would love... Oh, hello. There you go, Wibbs. we would love you to follow our beautiful little podcast and to be a little legend. Ratings would be lovely as well, please, guys. Yes, five star. That would be nice. Give us a follow. If you're watching on YouTube, hello, please subscribe now. That would be super. And we will see you next week. Bye-see-bye, bitches. Over and out. This has been a Global Player original production. Hey, man, you hungry? Let's order delivery. Yeah. I was thinking... Italian. Burgers? Oh. Game night just got tense Two bros on different sides of the fence Burgers or pasta tonight Why can't we have food without the phone?

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