'Now That's What I Call Luisa!'

26:56Anna Williamson:Not available in all states or situations. I said what I said. I said what I said, our new feature, which I'm really quite enjoying, where we just basically vent possibly an unpopular opinion. We let you guys vent as well. So here are some, I said what I said, high rocks and everyone that does high rocks can just fuck off. I've said it. That is coming from a listener, not me. Yes, yes. I do quite like the idea of high rocks, but I feel like it's injury central. We're in the same wanker territory of, Yeah, I've just had my matcha and my, it's just the same old, I'm into my high rocks and then my matcha.

27:33Anna Williamson:Another listener has said, people from a two-parent household whose partner is out for an evening and not solo parenting. Oh yeah, you're parenting. You are a solo parent when you are literally solo parenting. Please can people from two-parent households stop using the term solo parenting. Probably come in from a solo parent. Yeah. I said what I said, well done. there needs to oh I'm I am on this one guys there needs to be fines in place to cyclists who ignore cycle lanes yeah and you know what else I'm going to add to this go on cyclists should have to pay road tax and be insured I think hmm insurance I think is important yeah they should and also if you run a red light when you're a cyclist they should be made to adhere to the highway code because they're on the fucking roads So if you're cycling your bike on a road, you therefore should, yeah, you should adhere to the highway code.

28:33The amount of times that cyclists just fucking bowl through a red light, people have been like deaded, unalive. They have been deaded. From doing a crossing when the little green man's on and some fuck quit cyclist comes through and whacks them and knocks them out. And that's it. Kasplat. Dead. So therefore, they should be insured. They should be taxed. Let's just tax everyone. Andy Burnham's our new Prime Minister anyway. It's going to happen.

28:58Anna Williamson:I mean, it's going to be 100 % tax at this rate. Hooray! Yeah. Next one is unpopular opinion. Another new fan said NHS discount, blue light discount, armed forces discount, what a load of bollocks. Should be scrapped. I said what I said. Ooh, strong one. What do you get discount if you like work for those? Where do you get a discount? Loads of places. Really? Loads of places. Well, there's me faking an NHS ID. Got me NHS card. Do you work for the NHS? I've never been asked that. Do you work for the NHS? I've never been asked that. I obviously don't look like that sort of compassionate, empathetic type of person that would want to, yeah, serve people.

29:41Yeah. Oh, I 100 % agree with this one. All BMW drivers are wankers. Yes, they are. Hasn't that always been the thing? But they actually are. And it's always like young guys. in a shitty little BMW. We've actually, can I say, rented a BMW for this holiday, a convertible BM. And I have to say, it's quite nice to drive.

30:04Anna Williamson:But you'll take the wanker status with it. Yeah, but it's quite nice to drive. Someone else said, I said what I said. I hate school photos and newborn photos. Yeah, okay, with you. Overpriced, ridiculous poses. And to be honest, who the fuck wants that picture on their wall? It's so true and you feel obliged to have to buy it. I've never bought a school photo. You're not? I don't buy them. I buy bloody pictures, don't I? Do you? I don't buy them. I've got nicer pictures of my kids, like not in school uniform. Fair, fair. Like nice, candid, happy, beachy, you know. I don't need old boring Betty in her bloody blazer.

30:41Right. Putting, oh, this is me. Putting emojis over kids' faces on social media is creepy and weird. If you don't want to post their faces, then don't post them at all. I do get this and I do think this but then sometimes I still put the fate the emojis over

30:58Anna Williamson:sometimes I do it just in care but rarely but I do I will I'm with you sometimes I just think why bother just don't bother doing it sometimes I go to put a picture up and then I just think what's the point and then I don't put it up most of the time but then sometimes I do think oh like little Clemmie's horse riding achievements and I want to like remember them in my in my grid it's not even about like sometimes don't you scroll through your instagram and just look back and think oh remember that remember that yeah yeah so then it is quite nice having that and you do get really proud of them so there is a part i get i get why people want to share like because it you do feel really proud of them um and the last one on here is making your bed is a pointless chore oh you sloverly bastard no i don't agree with that i like look look behind me yeah made bed i didn't do it always make your bed um i have the made bed it's nice getting into a made bread you don't want to get into crumpled up sheets and and yuckiness I said what I said I'm with you nice made bread spritz of comfort and then done you know actually I'll do that as my record second oh oh okay Imo have you got an I said what I said yes I do have an I said what I said it is that um I think that chat GPT is ruining things for people you know what that's like a big movement now is people are really against like there's a whole no I'm just going to be a bit uh rude here am I but there's quite like this movement isn't there of like woke people not liking chat gpt like I think there's there is a there is a very good time and place for AI but I just I think it's a big thing against it people are boycotting companies that use chat gpt I just think it's a shame that like it takes the creativity out yeah like we get so many messages from people and I'm like it's blatantly been written by chat gbt guys and it's just so much better to use your own tone of voice and it's just taking away like individual expression and individual well also it's just lazy isn't it and I I I do use it for like now I'll be able to write me an email to this person that's really bad you are right there's a big thing of that I put who it wasn't me someone put something up and it was obviously chat gbt there was a lot of negativity on it like a lot of hatred for the chat gbt I've noticed this AI but even my birthday invite I did it with AI and I didn't want to I'm going to redesign it on Canva yes do it do it yes we need to we need to roll it back a bit not be so reliant good one and then I've got and I said what i said because it really did boil my piss the other week and i don't know why it boils my piss you may have said this in the past in a sort of ranty way but slightly different i think um but gender non-reveals where people are doing a gender reveal on their instagram feed like they've got the cake they've got the different balloons and the poppers and then they get to the crux of and you see their reaction and then they either say they either then move it to gray so you don't know what the colour is, or they then do a dot, dot, dot, we'll reveal it soon.

34:10Anna Williamson:No, it's annoying. Stop doing non-gender reveals. You are not an episode of Neighbours. We don't need a dot, dot, dot. Anyway, I said what I said. It's time for... It's the record circle, the record circle, it's the record circle. Seamless? Was that seamless then? It will sound more seamless in the edit, yeah. Right, I've got one. Talking about making beds. Are you picking your toenails, Anna Williamson? Yeah, I've got a really sore toe. Really sore toe, sorry. Right, talking about making beds, the best way, like, you know, everybody loves that smell of, like, fresh linen, crispiness when you get in the bed, and it smells lovely, and it doesn't smell all, like, musky and beddy.

35:00so what I've started to do in my head is uh you know I did used to do this and I've just remembered it and I'm gonna reco it and I'm gonna start doing it again you get like comfort or fabric softer and then you water it down a bit into a spray bottle keep it by your bedside and whilst you're making your bed you just spritz it on your bed and then make your bed and it smells like a fresh bed every night good record that's my record and it just keeps everything smelling fresh and nice and also you can do it with your clothes as long as they're not delicate or sensitive but yeah definitely do it to the sheets just get a little spray bottle fresh fresh little homemade fresh linen every night little homemade like that yeah that's my

35:46Anna Williamson:record i've been doing that with a bit the same but different with a conditioning spray the kids little condition spray ran out the other day so yeah just a little bit of normal conditioner bit of water that'll do yeah whack it in the old hair like that good record um my one this week is a product okay honey honey so i was very fortunate a few weeks ago i went on this really fab retreat with um jessica dina and uh frida redknapp and it was one of the brands that was there um which sponsored it was skin cuticles now i haven't been paid to say this or anything i'm not working with them or anything like that truly but i tried the most incredible serum where somebody said i had like this like really amazing cool bougie influencer who clearly knew her shit when it came to like beauty products and she was like oh my god this is this is literally dubbed the botox and a bottle and i was like oh talk to me now queen yeah talk to me now um this shit i'm not even joking i look like my face was a light bulb in a good way it's no yeah it's skin cuticles p-t-ox p-dash-t-i-o-x should i buy this to the point i'm gonna buy it was actually out of state and they've got a new cream that's also been stocked it's out of stock skin cuticles p-t-ox I don't know how much it is, but I'm perfectly honest.

37:13It's 100 quid on Amazon, but maybe that's because that's...

37:16Anna Williamson:Well, it is quite a... It is pretty high-end, I'm not going to lie. It is a spenny one. However, I tried this serum, whacked it on the old Fizzog. Jesus! I mean, I look like I'd had 15 nights sleep. Really? So it's called SkinCeuticals Petyox. Oh, it is really expensive. It is 100 quid for 30 mil. Really spenny. but when somebody said to me this is not the brand that say this I don't know if they want me to say this or not but I'm just because I'm not affiliated with it but anyway I'm just this is a genuine reco I gave it a go so one of the girls said oh this is an amazing product it's like Botox in a bottle I was like strong claim babes well let's just say it really did live up to the hype so that's my reco seco do you know what's interesting when I look that up do you know what else comes up is you know that brand MediCube that I love they do a peptide serum and it's only£14 and that comes up top underneath the skin.

38:14Does it? Yeah, it does. And I haven't bought that and I'm wondering I might get both and then do a product review.

38:22Anna Williamson:Do a product review, Lou. Do it. I'm going to do that. Love that. That's mine. So there we go. We've got a skin serum from me. We've got, what was it again, Lou? Fabric conditioner. The fabric conditioner on your bed. And Imogen? Mine is a TV show. okay it is excellent it's been out a long time but it's so fab it's called hacks and it's just brilliant it's basically about an old comedian in america and she's getting on a bit and uh she's kind of over the circuit and she wants to become more relevant so she hires this young comedy comedy writer and uh they kind of have like a love-hate relationship like it's very much the older comedian is very Lou you would love her she's very like un-PC she's yes she's very into that stuff and then she hires this very like woke down to earth like gay writer and they just have this like love-hate relationship it's hilarious and there's five seasons of it it's just finished completely five seasons yeah and that's a lot of binging but the episodes are they're like the shorter ones so it's like 20-30 minutes so it's really digestible and it's just it's just good fun it's just a great show it's won a shit ton of awards and if you've not watched it before watch it so remind us again name and platform hacks i think it's currently on now like h-a-c-k-s yeah you two love now tv maybe like i should get that i have to admit it's quite good yeah it's on now it's on now it used to be on prime but i think it's on now right now so go and watch it on now now perfect that was your echo seco guys enjoy right messages uh message from anonymous so anna seed should i this one?

40:22Anna Williamson:Anna Sage. I have a story for you queens. By the way, love you guys. Your podcast makes me cackle. Right, my ex messaged me once and was like, babe, I've been trying something new and I think I've been wiping my bum wrong. I say, what do you mean, lol? He goes, can I show you? I'm obviously like, yeah, go on then. Thinking he was just going to show me with his hands the action that he does. He then proceeds to send me a video of him shoving a fuchsia sharpie up his arse and pulls out a bum worm what the fuck i say to him that is a bum worm you need to get tablets he then starts freaking out crying and saying that he's been collecting the bits of tissue no they're worms the bits of tissue are worms oh no I'm now gagging down the phone because he has now shown me a pot of dead bum worms.

41:20Oh, he's been collecting the bits of tissue, but he's actually been collecting worms.

41:25Anna Williamson:He thought were toilet roll tissue worms. He thinks he's going to die and says he's going to try and get them all out with the Sharpie. I start losing it and I'm saying, please just go and get some tablets. His mum walks into the room and sees him with a future Sharpie up his arse. The last thing I hear is her screaming for his dad. Long story short, he blocks me. so I turn up to his house his mum answers and just says he doesn't want to see you I ask why and she says you know why he told me you made him do that for you and slams the door in my face I never saw him or his mum again can I just say that is the most bizarre message I think we've had in 8 years

42:05Anna Williamson:I want to know why the future why did he start but why did he put put it up there in the first place people are so weird aren't they i'm speechless by that whole message please move on cooler right uh oh i've got the hippie doobies we've got a message sorry sorry yeah oh we've got a message from a non so barb hi imo luanna and bex i started listening to the podcast last may and i'm completely hooked you've made me cry laugh cringe in the best way thanks for all the girl chat wisdom. Please keep me a non, call me Barb. I need some honest advice. I've been with my fiance for four years. We got engaged last year.

42:47My best friend, Star, has been like a sister to me. My family live overseas and she's been my biggest support for the last five years. I encouraged her to go for a management promotion at work and she ended up becoming both mine and my fiance's manager. As time went on, my fiance felt unsupported by her and believed that I was taking on extra work to make her job easier. It caused a lot of arguments between us, especially when she called me after work to vent. Things came to a head in April when my fiance made a formal grievance against Star. I kept my distance whilst it was being investigated, but once it was resolved, he told me he never wanted her in our lives again.

43:27Since then, Star and I have been speaking in secret because I know how upset it would make him. She's like family to me, but I also want to be loyal to my fiance, oh my God, this is so awkward. I said, I feel like I'm having an affair. Star thinks he's coming across as controlling, but I see him as setting boundaries and looking out for us at work. I don't feel controlled or coerced. To make things more complicated, my fiance also no longer speaks to my stepdad after a disagreement over a year ago. My mom is heartbroken because it's affected family time together and Star worries that I'm becoming isolated from people closest to me.

44:05I think Star might be right. My fiance can easily cut people off in his life, even family, if he feels they're crossing a line or hurting him. I'm afraid of conflict. Before my fiance started setting these boundaries, nobody questioned our relationship. I'm planning a wedding and a future with him. Am I missing something here? Please help.

44:23Anna Williamson:So the big bloody issue here is, this is where people get it so wrong, a boundary is not something that you put in play that affects someone else. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. As in, I can't say, Lou, my boundary is that you don't see Imo again. Yeah. That's not a boundary. That is me telling you what you can't do. My boundary to keep my mental health safe is that you're no longer to see Imo. It would be you're not seeing Imo. Exactly. Nothing to do with me. Nothing to do with you. Or if you have a relationship with Imo that I'm not comfortable with because you're my wife or whatever um that is that is me saying that i yeah you can control your own emotions but you cannot this is what what strikes me about this whole message i'll be completely honest i was still thinking about bum worms at the beginning of this my brain my brain went into bum worms but but from what i've just picked up on this and i think is always a bit of a red flag for me and this is with my therapist hat on is when you see patterns of behavior and if this guy has now a pattern of behavior of having conflict and disagreeing with people and cutting people out cutting people out I think that is something to be really wary of because that says to me somebody that isn't setting a boundary that says to me someone that is conflict avoidant um in the sense that they can't effectively communicate and that is a problem this is a real issue I think sorry I think there's a real red flag around this guy um even if even if it is down to just can't you know it might not be machiavellian or controlling necessarily it might just be terrible communicator and conflict of us but he's got to sort that out because this is this is affecting your life when someone says they're setting a boundary it pisses me off and i hear it so much it's such a tiktok thing now people yeah it's just my boundaries no it's fucking not it really can't it's so a boundary is something that you set that keeps you safe and respected at no point should your boundary be forced on someone else exactly impact the way that someone else is living their life you have a choice in life let's say you have a choice to either accept something or not according to your boundaries so this he doesn't actually understand what a boundary is quite honestly so I think this is quite dangerous and I think you need to be really wary yeah but I think that he's using boundaries as an excuse to control you a bit I do, I'm sorry.

46:40And I think that he, you need to be really careful because he's clearly already isolating, you know, your mum's heart broken because your family now can't spend time together because he's isolated your stepdad. That means that he has therefore isolated you from your family. He's now isolated you from your best friend. It's a red flag. two closest people to you he has removed you from them essentially because of his boundaries so i honestly i do think it's i do think this is a major issue and actually the more time that goes on how many more people is he going to do this with what because he has an issue with them is he just going to say about everyone that he doesn't like in your life i don't like that that's my boundary you know we're not to see them anymore it shrinks it shrinks it shrinks it gets smaller and smaller and this is how like shit starts you know this is how it starts exactly it starts all well and good and then this okay now you're isolated from that person now you're isolated from your family and your best friend and then you might have a relationship with another friend and he's going to have an issue with that person and then eventually your circle shrinks so small that you the only person that you will have is him and that is when you will start to see a more kind of potential domestic abuse setting in mentally, emotionally, and then physically because you're so isolated from everyone.

48:08You then feel like you can't go back to those people because you haven't spoken to them for so long, blah, blah, blah. So I do think you need to tread a bit carefully here. If it was me, I don't think I'd be storming ahead with the wedding planning, to be quite honest with you.

48:22Anna Williamson:And I also, I mean, I think the clue in here is for me, is when you say I'm afraid of conflict. I get that, babe. I hate conflict. But there's a difference between, look, in life we need to teach others how to treat us and to lose point there, if this is just being accepted and it's another one, this potentially could keep happening. There's another problem. And the more that you don't address it... But this is how a cycle of abuse starts. It can do, exactly. This is how... You might think, oh, but we've been together for four years and it's been fine. Let me tell you, people have been in relationships for 10 years before they would consider, oh, you know, you hear things like, you know, I just don't understand it.

49:03We were together for 10 years and then he just started like knocking me about. Well, actually that abuse started years before that. You just didn't realise because people don't realise. They just think, oh, well, you know, we just had a few disagreements or, you know, he just didn't like this and that. But actually you've been together for four years, But a year ago, he isolated you from your family by having a disagreement with your stepdad. So actually, look, I'd like you to look back in your relationship and look at the issues that you kind of let go and just accepted and actually see the behavior from the start.

49:39because you might think, oh no, but you know, when you look back and you start analyzing things and you think about when that disagreement was with your stepdad and when this grievance started with Star, like, you know, that might actually go feed back into quite the beginnings of your relationship, you know, like sort of nine months in after that love bombing stuff's been done. I just think, tread carefully, because anyone that's important to you should know and respect the other people in your life that are important to you and those often are yeah your family and

50:12Anna Williamson:your best friends yeah the three of us who are married now if any one of us had to keep a close friend of ours secret from our other halves not normal it's not okay that is not a healthy fulfilling respectful interdependent relationship imagine if I had a friend I spoke to without telling Alex because he would get cross it's not okay it's not okay good luck honey but please tread carefully is what we're saying right we've got another message from anon so marge ory oh charles just walked in i'm on the pod hi girls love the pod and all that jizz uh just said uh just said to piss that one lady off got a story for you my boyfriend is making me send this in to you keep me anonymous for the sake of my dignity give me a porn star name please emoji i recently turned 43 and for my birthday my partner took us away to newcastle to see take Oh, I bet.

51:33Anna Williamson:when I vomited right over his dick. My child has to walk in just during this story, doesn't she? A combination of sick white wine and the barbecue crisps all over his crotch area and the stomach. Not wanting to ruin the moment, I continued. Oh, babe. Whilst trying to slurp up the sick and wanking. Oh, that's rank. Oh, don't. In the cocktail of sicky wine and regurgitated barbecue crisps with my hand, until he told me that it was starting to burn. The smell and texture of the lumpy, chunky, sick do not make efficient lube. So many firsts today. Who knew after eight years? My partner does not hold this against me and often takes the mick reminding me that this is not the most offensive bodily fluid I have left on his dick.

52:19Anna Williamson:I still managed to enjoy my birthday and take that. We're amazing. Good for you. Good for you. Burning, sicky pop chips. Pop chips and bile. Great. Remember, if you want to get in touch, you can email us, Luana at everythingluana.com. You can also drop us a WhatsApp on 075-215-64640.

52:47Queen Carvania stood haloed by the morning sun. An army hung on her every word. My champions, I have sold my chariot on Carvana. It was a lovely SUV, an inexplicably queenly offer.

53:04Anna Williamson:They're even coming to the castle to collect it. Tonight, we feast. An offer you can feast on. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up fees may apply. Right, this. Now, I did read this the other day on our Everything Luana official Facebook group. And we just thought it would be a good little thing to chat about. So this post came in from HandsomePelican5120, if you want to go and look the post up. That is an alias name. And the message said, has anyone had baby name regret and actually changed their name months later? I'm struggling with my daughter's name. My husband loves it, but genuinely keeps me awake at night.

53:54I hate introducing her to people. I don't have a fantastic alternative that it must be. which is also an issue. I'm curious if anyone went through with it and how difficult it was. Now, I was left wondering what the name was. I don't know whether she ever revealed the name. I don't think she did, not that I saw. Oh, damn it. But a few people reply, well, quite a lot of people. Someone said, I'm a few months postpartum and the same. I've never had it with my others. I had such a difficult pregnancy. She didn't look like any of the names I thought. So when dad said it, I was like, sure, I don't hate it, but I'm not obsessed with it.

54:30Quite a few people are saying that they regret their name.

54:34Anna Williamson:Do you know what's really weird? Is honestly, before having seen this message two days ago, my little list, Elle, whose real name is Eleonora, we had this conversation and Elle wanted to know if she wasn't called Elle. And I was like, oh, you just remind me of Eleonora. But Alex regrets her name. He wishes we'd called her our alternative name. This is how it came up, which was Alessandra. I loved Alessandra. I love Alessandra. And I don't know why you didn't call her that. But she is a little L. She's a little L, exactly. I didn't call her. This is no offence to anyone called this, but I thought people are going to call her Sandra and I just didn't want to have a Sandra.

55:08Anna Williamson:Alessandra. Oh, see, I wouldn't go to that. I would go for Alex. Wow. But I would call her Alex. Yeah, but then I've got a husband called Alex. So I do like Alessandra. And then I also liked Chiara, but then everyone gets that long. I don't like that. Sounds like kebab. Brilliant. and then I also liked the Italian version of Dorothy because Dorothy was dead nanny's name. I like Dorothy because Dottie. Dottie, exactly, with Dorothea but then again, people wouldn't get it right. Sounds like Donatella. It does. So I settled on Eleonora because my midwife was also called Eleonora so it was like that.

55:42Anna Williamson:No, that's a coincidence, isn't it? So out of the two names, Alessandra and Eleonora, I went, and I liked little L. I like L and Ellie. But he wishes it was Alessandra so it's weird this has come up and he was like, when can you change your name? I do what's her middle name Mary Maria after nonna yeah my nonna was called Maria I really like Alessandra do you know what other name I like Alexandrina ooh nice yeah cute I like Alexandrina do you know that's Queen Victoria's real name yes I did know that actually I think I've told you that that's why sure sure probably what if you could change what if you could change would you change any of yours well when I just had Clemmie I wanted to call her Clover and I know it's a dog's name I had her and then there was like quite a few people in the room like the doctor and the midwives and stuff and I was like oh Clover Saskia Collins and they all went we like Saskia oh shade and I was like um yeah my mum and Angie didn't like Clover but I love it is sweet it is sweet to be fair like I do quite like the sort of florally name sometimes I wish I would have called mine posher names, like Arabella, Allegra and Alexandrina.

56:58Imo, have you got any new baby name ideas? She's not going to tell us, is she? Because she's not got kids yet. I wouldn't share. She won't want us to put her on. Okay, but can you tell us, are you a kind of tradition? What is a name you like, though, that Naomi doesn't like, that you won't use, that you wish you could use? Yeah, that's true.

57:15Anna Williamson:That's a good one. Yeah, tell us. So I read her out my list that is on my phone the other day She didn't turn her nose up at any of them, which was positive. Can you give us a few from the list, just a little tease, but not your favourites? And do you like traditional names or more out there names? I think I like more traditional boys' names, but I like more different girls' names. Oh, me too. I like Sebastian, William. Yeah, very trad. Very trad names, Lou. Yeah, that's what I like. Enzo's is George. Yeah, I like that. Emma, just give us one girl's name, one boy's name that you'd like. One, okay.

57:56Luanna, of course it is. Oh, lovely. Is Luanna on the list? No, it's not, no. That's it. That's out of order. I really like the girl's name Hazel because it was my grandma's name. Do you? That's quite sweet. And I think it's really cute. I like Hazel. And I don't think it's used very much. Yeah. And there was this girl I met. I don't remember where I met her, but she was called Hazel. And I thought, oh, I've not actually heard Hazel on like a young girl person before. I liked it. and boy's name I quite like Frank I think it's fun

58:25Anna Williamson:Carrie's got a Frank she's got a Frank hasn't she yeah I like it that's one of each well thank you for giving us an insight into that and that was a that was a really good a really good post actually and I'd like to know anyone that did actually change someone says that they though this Lou Fannin says I did change my daughter's name struggled to choose it didn't feel right she's about two months old and we changed it I was so relieved my husband agreed We still sometimes receive cards with the wrong name and all of her baby keepsakes and blanket with the wrong name on it. Why don't people tell us on this thread?

58:59What the names are. Yes, we all want to know. Do you want to know the top names? They haven't really changed. No, go on. So Olivia is still number one for girls, the 10th year running, Olivia. And then Lily, Amelia, Isla, Florence, Freya, Poppy, Elsie, Ivy, Isabella. There's one of each of those in Elle's class. Yeah, I know kids with all of those names. And then we've got boys. Mohammed is still the number one name. Noah is second, which is quite interesting. Leo, Luca, Arthur, Oliver, George, Oscar, Theodore. See, Theodore's very popular because it becomes Teddy or... Teddy or Teo or Theo. Yeah.

59:39And number 10 is Freddie.

59:41Anna Williamson:Nice. All nice names, to be fair. My mum and dad were going to call me Verity and then changed it to Anna. Thank the Lord. Right, let's move on. It's time for... It's the Widow of the Week. Hang on a sec. Right, first up we've got a voice note from Lucy. Hey girls. My name's Lucy and I'm from Lincoln. I'm just sat in the car outside school. Did have the aircon on. I'm now sweating because I've turned it off so you can hear me. Right, is this weird? I have just been to Asda and bought five Salix flamingo trees that are dead because they were reduced from 13 quid to three quid. And I couldn't leave them all there.

1:00:32So I had to buy them all because I wanted one. But then I felt sad. So I bought two and then I felt sad for the other three. So I bought all five. So now I've got five dead Salix flamingo plants that I'm now trying to Google how to bring back to life, which is not going to be easy. during the hosepipe ban. Is that weird that I couldn't leave the others behind? I'm not sure. Or is it just because I care about the trees? Anyway, love you all. Have a good sit in the sunshine, if you will.

1:01:03Anna Williamson:Bye. It is pretty weird, babe, because you're now like a lot of money down with nothing to show for it. And having to have a hosepipe ban. Do you think anyone pays attention to the hosepipe ban? I do know, yeah. Really? what happens if we don't pay attention to those like that i didn't even know it was on how are you meant to know yeah i saw i saw it in the news it was in the news yeah people people have been very compliant when i live i have to say i have to say um well that's really weird you've got a dead trees but bless you but bless you um and the next is anonymous so an abomination an abomination hi loana becks me and my colleagues started listening last year from the start we finally caught up well done i'm not sure what we're going to do for now though we'll be listening to you for six to eight hours a day at work for the last 18 months wow it's a lot that's intense it's a lot of us anyway i have a weirdo of the week for you in their 40 odd years together my mother-in-law has never washed my father-in-law's pants he washes them himself in the bath he gets in the bath pants on and then he proceeds to take them off in the bath uses them as a crannle to wash his face and behind his ears and then hand washes them with shower gel, rings them out and hangs them on the radiator to dry.

1:02:22Anna Williamson:Apparently he's done it since he was a teenager and only takes four or five pairs with him on a two-week holiday. So no spare shit yourself, pants in sight. Wow. Wow. Wow. I mean, for me, it's got to be old Skiddy Steve.

1:02:43I'll go with Skiddy Steve as well I mean, Imo? Yeah, I agree, that's very odd It's got to be Do you know what I do though when I'm on holiday I'll come out of the pool, I'm in my bikini now and then I'll have a shower before I go out tonight and then I'll wash my bikini in the shower and hang it up because I don't like putting it in the washing machine No, I think that's quite normal And I just wash my ninny juice out

1:03:11Anna Williamson:do you know what the thing is though i know exactly what you mean the little the little the little white you just have a little you get some shower gel and give it a little scratch don't you just to sort of smoosh it about a bit turn it into a paste and then give it a bit of a wash and lick it off you would well on that bloody note lou do you have a rant do you know what i've just got a minor rant it's very small i just think people that don't do jobs they like we've got uh cleaners coming into this villa every day right and then dixie had a friend here and he left and i washed all his sheets and i dried them all and i folded them i didn't iron them but i folded them all up really nicely washed all the towels then i put them like on the bed in his room for them to like make up the bed um because indian clen we've been sharing and now they can have their own rooms and then came back we'd been out came back looked at the bed they had made the bed but taken the sheets away so all they'd done is put like the bare duvet pulled that up i'd folded it like at the end of the bed and i piled the pillows up like and then put the linen next to that and the cleaners had taken the linen and towels gone vamoosh vanished made the bed like pillows neatly accent pillows duvet pulled up without any covers on and i just think people there's two reasons there's there could only be two reasons why to do that okay and you tell me if you don't agree with this.

1:04:51Go on. Stupidity or laziness. That's it. What other reason could it be? You're either really fucking stupid that you don't realise what the situation is here when it's like fucking slapping you in the face, okay, right? Or you're just fucking lazy and you just couldn't be asked. And both of them are unacceptable. I will allow more for the stupidity, okay? Because it's not people's fault. if the few sandwiches short of a picnic okay you can't help your dna i might have a c what's your

1:05:27Anna Williamson:c cleaners might not realize and might be thinking that no one else is now going to be occupying that room so they didn't want to put the fresh linen on because you know how you put fresh linen on and it's not like wasted but they might just want to leave the fresh linen all folded where it smells nice and pure for its first wear and they're making the bed so it looks smart and clean and presentable, but they might not... But why not ask them? Why not say someone was in this room? Like, because, I'm not being funny, we've rented a six-bedroom villa, not a five-bed villa with a fucking bed that you can't use because there's no fucking sheets.

1:06:02And the worst thing is, they've taken the sheets now and the sheets aren't there for me. I would have happily have made the bed. That was my plan anyway. I think some effective communication is needed. It's fucking annoying. Yeah, that is annoying. What do you think, Ims? stupid or lazy I don't understand where they've put the sheets because it's like someone owns this villa so there's like cupboards that are locked with linen and towels in so I think that they've taken them I just realised that I've cleaned and folded them and put them in a cupboard but maybe for them that was a sign you were done using them but I wouldn't have washed them and folded them well who knows maybe they thought you were doing them a solid someone could have just shit themselves and needed just a little change of linen.

1:06:49Anna Williamson:Yeah. Yeah, but why not then put the fresh ones on? Exactly. It just annoyed me, okay? It just annoyed me. It's a calundrum. It's a good rant. And that is the only excuse, stupidity or laziness. I won't hear otherwise, and I just fucking hate laziness. It's my number one pet hate is lazy fucking people that don't do their fucking job properly. It boils my piss, okay? Lou's rant is housekeeping. That's it, guys. Well, listen, I hope you enjoyed the air. Don't worry, we're going to be back again on Monday. Of course we are. housekeeper rants and all. You don't have to wait until then though because Thursday we've got Luana totally extra.

1:07:21Anna Williamson:That, you sexy bitches, is your episode. We need you, Lufanian. So send in your guffage, your emails, all of your fun anecdotes, your petty pollies, just everything we want to know. It's Luana at everythingluana.com. Big, big one here. Please ignore any emails from scammers and report the bastards. There are lots of scammers pretending to be us and team Luana inviting you onto our podcast and live events. It is bollocks. Please report. It is not us. You can also hop onto WhatsApp, send us a voice note or a message. Our number is 075-215-64640. Please do follow our podcast, top right-hand corner, press follow now.

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