#860 - Sam Morril - Travis Kelce, OnlyFans & New York Chaos

23:57She's that she grew up in America, but she's born in Rome and she's, her mother's a talent. So she is this incredible. Well, does the Italian Jewish connection? Yeah, we make it work. We make it work. Yeah. I love, I don't know, some of these in Italian, I mean, mob movies were such a thing for me growing up because my brother was obsessed with good fellas and Godfather's like this iconic American movie. So there was this attack, it sucks that I'm reducing the Italian culture to mob movies for this point. It's the synthesis, it's pizza and mob movies. Yeah, but pizza is also very important to me.

24:29So we had a problem. So this this drink thing that we made we and I love the groan. So we tried to recreate in the US. I've heard a rumor that the same problem we encountered. It was the hardness of the water has got something to do with why is it pizza or pastries or something pizza? That's New Yorkers. Well, we will tell you water is not good enough. Is it true? Is that legit? I don't know. I've heard people say it's not true. I mean, look, they've got they figured I've had good pizza in LA. It can't be just, you know, because of the water. Yeah, but New York, yeah, we have good, we have good water here for sure.

25:06I mean, you and I should go to Flynn Michigan and try the pizza. Then we got to figure it out. We got to crack it. It's got a lead -lined crust on the outside. I'm like, oh, I still try it. What do you're a big sports guy? Yeah. What do football fans think about the Kelsey Brothers? It's the first time in, as long as I've ever sort of paid attention to American sports, where you've had an acting top flight athlete to multiple athletes with so much other public facing stuff. Well, podcasts, public relationship. Correct. So, is there a purist out there in the sports world that thinks that... No, because he's still performing.

25:50I think if he was an athlete who lost a step and then, you know, was like, I'm podcasting. I think when you're playing like shit and your podcast and your teammates are probably like, maybe stop the broadcasting. So super balls back to back. Yeah, he's a phenom. His brother was a great lineman and he retired, but Travis Kelsey is in the conversation for best tight end of all time and he's still unguarded when he's got the best quarterback. back. So I mean, they're unreal. A lot of people are convinced that Travis Kelsey and Taylor Schwiff were put together by like, you know, Democrats to be like, you know, they're like, it's not a real relationship.

26:34They're both Democrats. They're using them to get votes, which is I'm like, well, then get to fucking Republican celebrities. Get Kanye and Caitlyn gender to date. That's getting you some votes. That's more eyeballs. But my thing is, like his performance hasn't slipped with this Taylor Swift thing either. That's the other thing. Like we're talking about like your podcast and his performance is like, it's funny how much shit he's getting because every athlete Kim Kardashian started sleeping with, just started to suck. And he's still good. You know, sleeping with Taylor Swift Is a performance enhancer?

27:11No, no, I think someone that famous is probably draining you a little bit, but he's probably got endless stamina. He's a work -life athlete. Elite athlete, yeah. No, I think just being around that level of celebrity, I'm sure there's parts where he's like, fuck, I should probably be lifting right now or doing some training and I gotta put on a head. For top -aiding the paparazzi or whatever it's like what I gotta do. Sacrifice child blood at the full moon for a pentagram on the floor with people in hugs. I have to dress like a sailor at the US open. I should be lifting weights, but you know, uh, can you imagine if that is, if that was the truth, if it is a Democrat conspirator, Pfizer or whatever, gave, gave them both an unlimited amount of money or something, but you get the call.

27:54It's like, uh, Mr. Kelsey, um, you were being called up to do the duty for not only your political party, but the future of your country. It's like, all right, well, I guess, you know, I'm kind of always wanted to serve in one form or another. What What is it that you need me to do? It's like we need you to bang Taylor Swift. Yeah, not awful. Does worse jobs. Yeah. I think Katie Holmes got the same call, but from Tom Cruise's people, we needed to do a duty. We needed to protect an American movie star. You need to help him pretend he's not gay. We'll Smith, same call to Jada Pinkett and so on down the line.

28:32The Will Smith arc is fascinating. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely fascinating. I remember this video of his where he was on a treadmill, and there was a dude next to him on a treadmill, and they were gonna have a competition to see who would quit last. And Will says something along the lines of, either I'm gonna pass out or I'm gonna beat you. You know, and Will was kind of, he had this sort of almost Tony Robbinsy motivational sort of era, or at least this was part of it. I remember a bunch of different videos. I was like, ah, like I really like that. Is it before Goggins and Jocco and kind of that world of like you either win or you die stuff came through?

29:10Yeah. I was like, huh, we'll see. Well, well, it was like a kind of a shred of that. Masculine, hero, I am legend, he's jacked, he's done like a bunch of movies. What was that one? Hancock, where he was the drunk superhero? Yeah. That really charming, kind of unique, complex, slightly complex characters. I could have been so much better that one. That movie. Very premise. Yeah. Uh, yeah. And then you just look now and I don't know. So, you know, Danny and Ryan from the Boyz cast, they're both big Will Smith fans. And they're really worried. On ironically, this is not a joke, worried about Will Smith.

29:48And it's just such a weird arc that to kind of see what happened. And then there's these weird videos of him behind the scene. She got this, I've told you not to record me. Do you see that one? No. Well, this is my life and you're sort of met and it's her, it seems like sort of berating him a little bit or it's really, it's really, really uncomfortable to watch it obviously just in the house or something in this guy just like broke and dead behind the eyes. Such a weird arc. Isn't it amazing that you're so envious to some of these people's lives, there's only natural when you see how much someone has going on, you're like wow.

30:19And then they're often miserable. I mean, he really seems like an unhappy guy. It's almost like being that famous for what almost 40 years. It's not healthy. What other outcome could there have been after being famous for that long? I think he's probably probably gay. I don't know. I mean, could I get sued for this? All right. Allegedly gay. Allegedly. Well, it's like the marriage is definitely bad. You don't just slap someone in the face after they make a joke about your wife, because things are stable at home. That's not what you do. Someone makes one of my girlfriend, I'd be like, hey, don't, you know, just don't do that.

31:02I'm out of, or if it's an award show, I'd probably be like, haha, and then just fake it, you know? But you don't be like, keep a fucking name out of my mouth and then slap a guy on life. It's crazy, it's crazy behavior. Something's not right at home. I mean, she was publicly talking about having an affair, right? I wouldn't, I would probably wouldn't stay with someone who did that. I don't know what the divorce looks like. I don't know what the pre -nupt situation is. I mean, she seems like a absolutely psychopathic person. Yeah. She seems like a legitimate crazy person. I can't imagine someone, I'm sure he fucked around too.

31:39Lord knows with who, maybe women, maybe with guy, don't fucking know what they're doing. But if someone cheated on me and then went on a book tour talking about cheating on me, I'd be like, probably time to wrap this up. Did she say something was to do with rappers, too? Didn't who was it that she said that she was the muse for? Did she? Don't you just hate someone who fucking? Huh? Tupac. Was she? Apparently. That was part of the tour. She might be fucking good then. I mean, dude, she's responsible for Will Smith and two all eyes on me, me against the world and men and black in the 90s. Go Jada.

32:16She might be good. One of the things, even with the Kelsey Taylor Swift situation that I think about, and I guess Will Smith's one as well, is how difficult it is to have a relationship normally, and then how difficult it is to have a relationship with a few hundred million or a few billion people's eyes on you as well. I didn't think, I, mercifully, almost no one's ever going to really know even like someone like Rogan, like his relationship, his marriage, it's just not any part of anybody's conversation. No one really gives a fuck. He's done a very good job of compartmentalizing his private life and keeping it private, which I think is crazy.

32:55He's married to a Filipino boy, but he's done a great job. And good job, Joe. I just navigating a relationship that's that public must be essentially. No, it's, it's gotta be hard. I mean, but, Fom is, you're some of these people, their spouse is also famous. So when you're dating a famous person, people are fascinated with it, I guess. And I mean, look at Ben Affleck and JLo, it's, you know. What's the currently about to break up or breaking up? I thought they broke up, I don't know. Right, okay. There was a, I saw. I mean, it must be addictive. Ben Affleck's got the addiction thing, so it must be addictive to make what you know is a bad choice and fucking her is a bad choice for him clearly.

33:43It keeps ending, right? But he's gotta be like, it must be like a drink. Do they keep breaking up and getting back together? Well, they would date in like 20 years ago, remember? Yeah, like 20 years ago, they dated. Okay. And now back and now broken up again. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's clearly not working, but it's like, it's a beautiful thing of that work. I guess it was you all along. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a nice story. But not the one relationship. Jay -Z and Beyonce just seemed like, I don't know. That's the one that appears to just be moving smooth. But everyone's got problems. I don't buy the like, not real interest brown problem.

34:20That was, oh yeah, I was gonna say that wasn't a pro. That seemed to be very smooth. Cut and dry. And yeah, he, man, he really bounced back from that. Yeah, some people have really stayed canceled who have done way less bad shit. Have you ever checked out the Chris Brown Reddit? No. It is cult like. People love him so much. It is, it's a real force of nature to see. And if you see any... Would you say that they have a toxic relationship with him? I don't know. I think they probably do. I don't know. It's very obsessive. I don't know what it is. I need to do a deep dive on it. I've seen a couple of videos that kind of break it down.

35:02But if there's ever any criticism, it's kind of this swarm, presumably, it maybe appears on the subreddit or some other channel of some kind. But yeah, Chris Brown's a uniquely sort of positioned, did he? Is he Chris Brown that did the Super Bowl this year? Is it him? No. No, this year's Kendrick Lamar is really. Kendrick Lamar, that was it. Yeah. But yeah, just wow. Very, very obsessive fanbase. So yeah, don't get on the wrong side of them, I think don't do a Chris Brown joke. That'd be a bad idea for you I've done so many have you of course. How could you not it's like he was like he was like the insert domestic violence joke guy for a while role model for domestic.

35:39Yeah, I mean you had to like he was the poster child for domestic violence. You had to throw him in I don't know I've ever comedies made a Chris Brown joke. It's like talking sprinting without talking you saying bowl. You can't exactly don't fucking don't beat up Rihanna And if you're actually talking about comics to make jokes about you, you know. In other news, this episode is brought to you by Shopify. Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify, which is why they're the global force behind Gymshark and Skims and Allo and Utonic. When it comes to converting browsers into buyers, they are best in class.

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36:45Head to the link in the description below to sign up for a $1 per month trial period or go to shopify .com slash modern wisdom all lower case. That's shopify .com slash modern wisdom to upgrade your business today. Staying in New York, one of the guys came on to breakfast the other day and said that he'd just seen Ryan Reynolds walking his dog. Oh nice. And like, Ryan Reynolds seems to be pretty much like the perfect dude that he's just funny and his relationships great and he buys a football club and he does stuff for charity and he builds billion dollar businesses. Yeah, the the GND Aviation GND.

37:18That's what Mark and I are trying to do with our whiskey, you know. Tell me about that. We have our own Bodega Cat whiskey and we, uh, we're getting state. In the states, you need to get distribution state by state. It's a tedious process. So Mark and I, you know, Mark and Norman and I start our own whiskey, Bodega Cat, and it's, you can get on Bodega Cat whiskey dot com, but you know, we're going through 15 cases a week of the comedy seller right now. It's great. We're at the strip house, the steak house on 12, Street was my favorite steakhouse. We're at the stand, the other comedy club, New York comedy club.

37:52We're comedy clubs are at the country right now. Just I think start up at the comedy store, the improv. We got to get the mothership in Austin too. But we're on it. We're moving and it's a long process, man. Lickers, some mob run shit. Really still. Oh, dude, it's crazy. Just the rings you have to kiss. And it's been a process. Well we did taste testing and stuff for productivity drink, but I imagine that the taste testing for getting a whiskey right is a little bit more. We didn't know we were supposed to spit it out. We got fucking hammered. You're kidding. Usually when you're sampling whiskey, we were just like, you know, we're pretty.

38:37that we got better. So yeah, the last ones that we try are always the best ones. Yeah, this is smooth. Yeah, we were pretty fucked up, but we went with one that was like, everyone has a bourbon where we're like, let's do rye. It's a little, it's a little difference. Rye is more rye. It's, you know, I mean, bourbon is a little naturally more sweet. Like makers is more sweet than like say, like a rye is typically a bit more spicy. All right, it's not that spicy. It's got like, it's kind of got like a caramel vanilla type flavor. It's got a little spice, pervert firm in headin. It's my favorite drink.

39:18I like them in headin, in the groany, in martini. Anything with it. Anything. I like the classics. They try to paper planes a good cocktail if you never had it. What's up? It's whiskey, apparel, Amaro Nonino, and lemon juice and equal parts. It's fucking great. Is a man, man happens to one that's got nothing in it that isn't alcohol, right? There's no mixer. I think it's a good drink. Amartini is the same way. That's true. But you do, uh, yeah, it's a man had and is whiskey, sweet, rumoo, a touch of bitters and a maraschino cherry. There, that doesn't have alcohol on it. The cherry. Fruit. It's a free solid.

39:59It's a free solid. It's a free solid. Yeah. By the time you have it, it has some alcohol on it, because you dunk it in. It's funny that people end up creating products that are built around the thing that they do. So for me, I wanted something that I could have before a podcast that would be good. So I do this. A lot of comedians drink. I got an alcohol because it was open bars. I was like 18. I was like, I get to drink for free here. I'll be a comedian. That was literally what... I mean, and then you were like, oh shit, I have to work hard. But at the time, I was like, I thought process was free drinks.

40:29Oh, my parents were terrified. Remember they came to a show and I was like, blackout drunk on stage? I just was like, I get to drink for free. I was young, I couldn't control myself, you know? Secret service accidentally included the 9 -11 hijackers in a tribute post to the victims this year. In a post on X, marking the anniversary of the attacks, the Secret Service included the terrorists in the death toll. So the flag hanging in our headquarters is a solemn reminder of 9 -11 in its mission's purpose. Testament to freedom and sacrifice, John has all 2 ,996 lives lost. But the actual correct number of victims is 2 ,977.

41:08They had to amend it and get rid of the 19 hijackers. A lot of people lost their lives that day, so let's not just, you know, you get through the terrorists in there too. I didn't know it kind of does make sense. You don't want to honor exactly the hijackers, but if you're going to cite how many people died that day, like we talking demographically accurate here, or are we talking in terms of tribute? I've always said that terrorists and comedians have a lot in common because we both get bummed when not enough people make it to a gig. You know, because I feel like terrorists would be like three people on a bus.

41:39This is fucking bullshit. You know, I guess I liked it. That's a moron. Yeah. Yeah. But uh, yeah, that's insane, man. That's uh, Yeah, geez. You must have been here during the day. I was, yeah. Can you recall the day? Of course, yeah. It was like, you know, people had cell phones, but no one had service. So I remember New York's an amazing city because everyone, by the way, in school the morning. The morning we found, the planes had, I had a Spanish teacher we all did not like, and she decided to give us a pop quiz. And we're like, we're under attack. We've given us a fucking pop quiz. And she was like, you should have studied.

42:20Not only from the Middle East, but also from you. That's so true. I mean, I was like, I was like, well, she's like, you should have studied. And I'm just like, I'm gonna fucking fail a test because I should have studied. But, and then I got out, I think I'm the test I wrote you suck because I didn't study. And I was like, I'm just gonna take the L here. And then, and then we got taken out of school. my dad was like, let's line up to donate blood because they might need blood at the hospital. So we went to a hospital. How far away were you able to see? I was in Lidon's. No, my dad saw it from his office.

42:54My dad worked in Times Square. So he saw the second plane hit from his office and it was like, Jesus, fucking Christ. Yeah. And then he went to pick me up at school. We lined up to donate blood every hospital we went to. They were like, we're good. Unless you have this blood type, we're good. Because so many people had done it too. Don't need people. Yeah. That's some New Yorkers art. We'll say fuck you to you in the street, but when shit gets serious, we will donate blood. We'll help out. But. How old were you? Geez, I was 15. Muses of 15, can a 15 year old give blood? Oh yeah. Yeah, that's a nice youthful.

43:27I had AIDS, but I didn't tell him that, you know? They didn't know that. But yeah, we all lined up my whole family, but crazy day. Crazy fucking day. And I was in New Orleans for Katrina. So that should follow me. It might be God might be trying to send me a message. Yeah. Yeah, no, it's it's why what was the subsequent few I don't know month a couple of months in New York like after that It was It was there was a bit of tension. I think there was definitely some looking back, there was definitely some Islamophobia, which is really unfortunate.

44:16I think there was everyone in the city knew someone who lost someone. You know, and - 3 ,000 people. That's great. Well, enough to touch a country. Don't forget the terrorists. Yeah. But it was crazy. It was terrible. It was a terrible thing. but you know, it's a resilient city. It's a wild thing. I watched, was it recently the 25th anniversary documentary started coming out and to look at just... Doesn't feel right to call it a 25th anniversary. That's what they called it. 9 -11 to 25. Buckle up guys. It's coming back to us. I went on a, I went on a, One of the planes years, it was like two years ago, it was 20 year anniversary, they did.

45:08It was, you're going through security and I said 9 -11, never forget. I'm like, I'm going through airport security. I can't forget, but I'm going through fucking, maybe don't remind me of a plane crash when I'm at the airport. Yeah, especially when I see going on a Boeing. Yeah, oh my God, fucking, that's another one. Alaska Air, talk about, you look online and they're like, we'll have a discount, Yeah, the flights you're going to speed you all the Alaska airs are like 500 bucks cheaper. It's a man that spends a lot of time on planes. I imagine that's something you might pay a bit of attention to.

45:39Yeah, if it was a girl, I'm not that serious about him. I'll fly in on a Alaska air. You might make it. You might not know who knows. Yeah, I mean, how many times does Boeing want to face plan? They've got the astronauts that are stuck in space as well. It's like not only... Although given how things are going in our country right now, they might be better off. chill out. But yeah, whether it's intercontinental or transatlantic or fucking interplanetary, they're able to sort of fail at each different step of the way. Have you ever been on a plane where you were like, this was going down? The worst turbulence I've ever had was on a flight, a 17 -hour flight from Johannesburg to Atlanta.

46:24And that I was laid flat trying to get some sleep. And I was lifted off a complete like absolute freefall air. That's how much like an extra system level fucking like a stadium. Yeah. And then Christmas this year, flying back to the UK, tons of delays taking off out of Austin. And the pilot came over and said, I know that we've been nearly two hours in being delayed for take up but don't worry because the jet stream, Gulf Stream is really strong at the moment. So we'll make the time up in the air. By the way, that's not a thing. We'll make the time up. It's the same distance. But he's able to go faster.

47:08I don't buy it. He managed to get us into like going down one of those water park slide shoot things with the pressure hose behind it, but the entire journey, I would have happily arrived two hours later and not been dishwashered for the entire journey. But those were the two that come to mind. And when you're in a really big plane, when you're in a little plane, you're like, okay, this is probably, there's a bit of me in the back of my mind that thinks, yeah, but it's like a ping pong ball. You know, it gets blown around a lot by the wind. But if you're in an absolute monstrosity with 500 people in it, in order for this to actually get shaken around a lot, I don't get that nervous, but those are two times where I sort I've been in the little one where I was, my friend Gary and I, it's so funny, I saw this, I saw a comedian Jim Norden at the comedy seller and he goes, oh, we are this week, where are you this week?

47:56And I said, I'm in Rochester and he goes, oh, I hope you're driving. I hate that flight, that little plane. I was like, now I'm flying. It's a long drive. Yeah, it's like a six -hour drive from New York. But he's like, I hate it. We're on the plane. Gary and I, we booked tickets to next to ourself. We're on the flight, Gary and I, we booked tickets to next to each other and some woman is like, I'm sitting here and I'm like, oh no, we booked it. But then I just looked in and like, it's a 40 minute flight. Like fuck, it just give her the seat who cares. And then we're in the worst turbulence ever.

48:27It's like shaking. We're going down and the instructor, like he doesn't even speak. He's just, I'm like, oh, we're about to German wings this shit. The sky's about to kill us. We're freaking the fuck out. We look at him, the woman who was supposed to be sitting next to the back row, starts going, and there was a moment where we were like looking at her like, fuck you bitch. You fucking, if you die, we won't be that upset. But then he just like top -gunned it. So we're going down and just flew, and we were like, what is he, is he fucking with us? Is this like some cruel joke? And then it turned out, like 10 minutes later, it comes on the speaker, like, sorry guys, it was too windy to land.

49:04I had to, I don't want to get on the thing. I had to focus. So I want to get us around. But then the guy picking us up the airport's like, man, one of those planes top -gunned it, we're like, that was us, dude. I partnered with Function Health because I wanted a better way to track what's happening inside of my body. They run over 100 lab tests each year, covering heart, hormones, nutrients, thyroid, and even detecting 50 types of cancer at stage one. That's five times more testing than a regular physical and all results are charted over your lifetime and explained in one simple dashboard. Lab testing like this would usually cost thousands, but with function, it's only $500.

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50:11That's functionhealth .com slash modern wisdom There's a movie I never saw this Argentinian movie called Wild Tales. It's great. It's a bunch of really dark Short like shorts basically and one of the shorts is everyone's on a flight and They start two people start chatting and it turns out they have a connection to each other and they're like that's weird and then a person behind them is like, did you say you know this person? And they all kind of turn out everyone in the flight knows each other and then it's a guy who got them all in a flight and kills them all. Oh, it's some sort of vengeance thing.

50:45Yeah, that's cool. It's a good one. The whole movie's great. I spoiled one for you, I'm sorry, but it's worth the last one at the wedding's the best one. It's incredible. Wiley, people watch that. I'm sure you can just stream it like we read movies. What's it called? Wild Tales. It's from like probably 10, 15 years ago. It's awesome. That's sweet. Every one of them is good. Yeah. I wonder, you know, when you think about The media that gets loaded onto planes so many movies have got plane crashes in but there's no way there has to be some sort of Limitation of what you can put under that you can't put Movies that have got that really extreme plane crashes in because because it's because of your sit next to him.

51:30You're like, I don't want to see that shit. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. There's a, You ever watch a go weird? I remember they had the movie secretary on my flight once and I'm just watching this and it's like a lot of BDSM. It's James Spader and Maggie Jellin Hall. He's, there's a secretary that he's really sexually inappropriate to. I mean, it was pre -me too. It's very dicey. Well, he's just making her do crazy kinky shit as a secretary and I'm just watching this and there's just like people next to me like, what the fuck you, You could tell they're like, this is not okay, but fun movie.

52:00There's a cool insight around airplanes where people that sit in economy have to walk through business together. There's a nine times increase in passenger agitation. So the number of incidents where somebody gets logged as being disruptive or whatever, it's increased by nine times if the people in economy have to walk through business class. So it's called the poverty parade. But basically everyone that's really nice has already sat on, they've got their champagne or their orange shoes or whatever. And then everyone else has got to sort of traipse past with their eyes down. There's the proletariat, have to go into their blood and feces and straw at the back.

52:41What I think for years, I think flying coach for so many fucking years, every weekend, like cheapest flight possible. I think it's fucked my neck up. So I'm six three, I would just fall asleep, like, And I was like, I think I have neck problems. But, you know, yeah, it doesn't make a lot of sense. You see a lot of incidents. I mean, people, that woman had a whole career made, that woman who had like a meltdown on the plane. This is what we do with Celeb. That motherfucker there is not real. Yeah, and she's like got a following now of people. It's so funny how people, instead of us being like, that person's clearly mentally ill, we're like, oh, we should continue to lift this person up.

53:21Yeah, she was the supernatural hot tour, wasn't she? She was. Hot tour is a big one. Well, I mean, the meme, I've been, I've been totally obsessed by over the last three months, all of this summer, the speed of memes and news. You know, we went from hot tour to Biden's scene aisle, to Trump's shot in the ear, to Kamala Harris' coconut season, to Bracknell's summer, to, you know, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, and every single one, it raised all of the ones that came previously. No one's talking about Trump being shot. No one is being, is to, he got shot in the ERO's piece of glass or whatever the two months ago.

54:00Yeah. And everyone's already I'm way over it. That's it's old news. Yeah, it was two months ago, the assassination attempt. But you know, it was September 14th of September or something like exactly, almost exactly two months ago. You know, it's interesting. Andy Warhol used to say everyone will be famous for 15 minutes, but he he didn't have this type of social media when he was around. Like you can parlay this into maybe a lifetime of success. I'll still have missed it without monetizing on only funds. That was the pivot. But then, but that she's so young that I respect her for not doing that.

54:31Because she could have done that. She could have been like, I'm just gonna get naked and be a, but clearly she's like, I wanna do some other stuff. But catch me outside, check did pivot into it. I think she's one of the top creators on only funds in our life. Oh my God. I think there was a... Cash or Finger in herself. Yeah, outside. There was a breakdown of Businesses that revenues and the number of employees that they have. I think only funds has Less than 60 employees and its revenues are in the billions. Yeah, per employee than per sports They say yeah, yeah, all of Every NBA player put together is less than the revenue of only funds.

55:12Yeah Which is weird because only fans LeBron who's like the biggest pay person? No, I don't know. Let me see if I can find out. Top, this is gonna, I'm gonna be pixeled for the rest of my time by searching top. I've never done it. I've never liked subscribed to someone. To only funds creators. I mean, this is gonna be, by the way, it's still funny to call them creators. Just some chick getting drilled on her couch and we're like, she's a creator. Creative. Erica Mennor, monthly earnings, 4 .5 million. Not bad. Bad baby, there's a lot of H's in that, 4 .33 million, Tana Hmong Hmong Yu. Who are you jacking off of?

55:54Honey, it's not what you think, it's a bad baby. It was jacking off to a bad baby. They have a Pond Hub, a really great, their data science team. This sounds like a, this sounds like the dog ate my homework, excuse for watching Pond Hub, but the data science team at Pond Hub is actually really, really great. and they'll tell you what the top trends are and the top searches and what's changed you are on your and you know this particular one state has got a foot fetish. Is that like naps through though for porn stars now because they're not paying them? Oh yeah that's a good point. But so I'm friends with an adult actress in the UK and she said that the whole job of Pondhub now for most at least women maybe guys too is it's the front end of the funnel that drives the traffic into.

56:43So it's like YouTube for comedians is point, point, point, yeah, more like Instagram where you've got your little short clips. And that's what'll go up on PondHub. You get to watch, you know, five minutes. Just her second a cop. Subscribe to my actual channel. Honestly, yeah, to, to watch the full video, see below. Yeah, you get to see it in 360p, but the full 4K surround sound experience is available on my website. Yeah, I don't know. My, it's, I mean, it's, it's absolutely fascinating. I used to have a joke about I would look at so much porn that it would like funnel into my because on the date naps You can choose like what kind of ethnicity you would want on some of them So I'd be you know I'd watch so much porn that it would funnel into it or I'd be like Asian Milf neighbor hand job

57:29Yeah, I do wonder what's What the future is gonna end up being whether we look back on this period is like an odd Every period's odd. Like, but yeah, that's, that is true. I suppose you look back at the Victorian era. It's like you, you showed too much ankle that Melinda. How could you, you know what I mean? Like that's a little bit of... Well now, well dude, everyone is in their own world right now. Everyone, like it's like that thing, like, you know, the meme, the bitch thinks he's the main character, you know, something like that. And you'll see a guy on a bike riding by. I was gonna hit by a guy on a bicycle a few days ago because he's filming himself, like talking for some vlog.

58:07and I'm like, some idiot, he could have gotten like badly hurt. I could have gotten maybe hurt, but he's like, it's all for content, man. And he probably got me at the end being like, fuck you, I'm angry. But like, that's all part of the video. That's all part of the video, right? In the background of that guy's cycling vlog. That's where I love about this city. I saw a woman scream at a guy, going the wrong way and a bike zoom in by and she goes, asshole, and I'm like, ah, I love an angry old lady in this city, they're fun. Well, those, uh, e -bikes, because I haven't been in - And people weren't helmets, dude.

58:39Absolutely. It must be at least 20 miles an hour, maybe more. That they're able to go in this dedicated cycle lane. Same with the scooters. Yeah. That's hard. Dude, I learn a drive in here. I'm a bad driver, but I can drive in Manhattan, which I think is one of the hardest places to drive, because so many fucking things are happening. Yeah, you need to be one of those Waymo cars, but you need that for your head. and you've got eyes wrapped all the way around your back. I don't know, I'm still very much, even I've spent a total of a month in the city across my life, there is a confidence that New Yorkers walk with.

59:17It's like a rhythm, self -assured vibration that they move through the city with, that if you're not, if you haven't been indoctrinated, you just do not have. I haven't got it. Well, the people have the right of way over the car. So it's like we're more confident, like Colin Quinn is like the quintessential New Yorker to me. He's a great comedian, Colin Quinn. He's got a Netflix special called New York story. It's one of the greatest stand -up specials ever, I think. I love Colin. He has a joke about how people will be driving. Like, oh my god, I almost got hit by that person. Because we walk with so much confidence, but it's the truth.

59:51We feel like we run this city. And when you are driving, you're kind of like, what the fuck is wrong with that guy? I could have heard him. You know, so if you're a New Yorker, if you're a, you know, domestic born and raised New Yorker, do you walk everywhere? Do you take the tube or is it sort of a choice based on your preference for whether you cycle? I don't buy sickle. I don't like, my dad never taught me how to ride a bike. I'm worthless, dude. I'm more I'm talking to my, holy shit, I have no abilities, no motor skills. He can just say rude things.

1:00:24Oh, I got. Yeah. My dad once took me to ride a bike in Central Park and just let go of me and I went down a hill and I crashed into a fucking tree And was like we're done with that and that was it. It was just like I give up. Bailey now. Yeah, and so I've I've written doing COVID. I was Well, we didn't know what was going on. I rode the bike a couple times downtown, but I was gonna wipe down a couple I sucked at it and No, I don't do this too. I saw the tube was basically just a a homeless fight permanently happening 24 hours a day that you know. No, that's the media. Like they're like, look, there's crazy shit happening on there, but they love when it does because it's like New York's falling apart.

1:01:01I ride the subway everywhere. Okay. I'm a walker. I walked here. I like the subway, but when I take, if I do take a car, I try to always make it a yellow cab because, you know, they fucked over the yellow cabs. The city, the medallion's worthless. So I try to... Would they not just pivot to becoming Uber drivers? Is that not the solution? Well, the problem was if you have a medallion, that was kind of an investment and you would say the medallion so you can get the cab expensive. Yeah, they would retire on them. They would send up selling for like over a million dollars, you know? So it was because there's a limited number of taxi spots available.

1:01:36Yeah. Right. So it's its gas result. It's like the original Bitcoin. It's a Bitcoin of the, of the taxi world. But then they just let Uber people, oh, you have a car. You can be an Uber driver. So that's fucked them over completely. So I try to stay lower with the cabs. Look, every once in a while you regret it, because in a world with no ratings, you don't know where you're walking into sometimes. So like, I'll be in there in the guys, like, oh, this guy's an asshole. He's, you know, but I try to stay lower with the cabs. What's your advice for people flying into and flying out of New York? Because for the first time ever, I flew into Newark coming here.

1:02:11That's pretty sweet. Yeah, well, you have options. You take a cab, you could also take the train. You can take Amtrak in, which is kind of nice. And then, you know, the subway, you got that, JFK, you got the, you can take the subway, if you want to go public transit. But JFK is a tough, that's a bad airport. Which is wild, because it must be one of the busiest airports in America. We'll look at LAX, that's a terrible fucking airport. And that's it. I've never heard anybody, I mean, I hate the, get on the bus to get to the cab, to get to the city. That, that, it's insanity. Very painful. It's like, you look like you're in like a detention camp.

1:02:45It's insane. Yeah, that is true. You're one of the Wiggers. Yeah, just waiting to be a job. Some way. Yeah, that's funny. Ah. Where else have I been to that was intro at Lanter's a wild airport? Yeah. That thing's a city that just exists as a you it's three miles to get to where you need to get new birds. Fucking crazy. Yeah. And there's that big loop train thing. Now we're doing what I said I should do is a community. Just talking about travel. It's all the time. Everyone listening right now I was like, I'm gonna fucking put a gun in my mouth. What else is coming up for you? Well, I got this special on prime video called You've Change.

1:03:21I'm proud of that one. It's got some really good jokes in it. Spend a couple, we've been like over a year and a half touring with that. So I felt pretty good about that hour. It's got a really, it's called You've Change because there was a bidnet where it's a true story. A woman tried to cancel me. I had a trans joke in a Netflix special. And it was actually a really positive joke. It was a fun joke. It was very positive about trans people and it went viral and all these trans people started weighing in like You know hell yeah one of them was like this how you do it? I was like I'm a fucking good guy I guess the next trans person was like this is our person now and I was like You know this could back I support but you don't want me the voice of the fucking movement and then the next Transpression was like this is my least favorite comedian and yes, I know his work and I was like who the fuck is this person So I start clicking on the profile and it's someone who tried to cancel me in 2013 and and she hated my jokes and he used to be a she, which I don't give a shit about, like to your life, do whatever the hell you want.

1:04:21But every post that he writes about me now is FUXAM or else he made bad jokes in 2013. So I finally responded, but you know that people can change. Very clever. So that's the specials called you've changed. And it's a fun specials on prime video. I think it's like hard jokes top to bottom. I got the rights back from my Netflix special. So that's on my YouTube channel. That's called same time tomorrow. I've got I got this which is a special I self -produced on YouTube in 2020 which I'm proud of that one too But then I'm on tour I'm announcing a new theater tour starting I believe first week of February doing the the tour bus and the whole thing and I'm coming literally everywhere This is probably coming up after my Euro tour so I Got Spokane I'm doing a weekend at a club in Spokane, Washington October 24 through 26 I'm doing a weekend in Cleveland at Haleiardies, one of my favorite clubs, November 21 through 23rd.

1:05:13I believe it'll be popping up all over just to work on the material before we go back to theaters and I'm coming to every American city truly every city so Sambrill .com and hit tour and I'll be coming near fucking city and I post my shit on punchup .live slash Sambrill because they don't send me my friend Danny Frank Ols started an app, you still work at Facebook. The issue for me at Facebook and Instagram is, I'm sure you deal with this. They bury any post that has anything problematic in it. And guess what? They decide what's problematic. It's becoming increasingly strict. I put a, I was wearing a very like loud pair of track pants yesterday that looked like what a karate teacher from the 90s would wear.

1:05:55So I put, can't wait to roundhouse kick someone in the face wearing these bad boys. within 30 seconds my account had a warning and I had to go through a bunch of things because it had been auto detected that I was inciting violence. It's insane. Wow, that's really... It's getting dangerous, dude. And it really, for jokes, like, you know, sometimes, sometimes you say something sarcastically. Sometimes you're... And, but guess what, if you're so tacit... Shara, comedians say his thing that he doesn't really mean. Exactly. But then you... They read that some robot that can't detect sarcasm, sees that as like a threat or like something that's hate speech, but you kind of have to look at a person's track record and what they actually believe.

1:06:36I'm not going to actually say what I believe all the time, but if you know who I am, you know what I believe. So what's the punch up punch up dot live. And he's got an app now for punch up. But Danny's become my good friend. He left Facebook because he loves comedy and he, you know, I think he did really well over there. But now he wants to. He wants to take down ticket master essentially because he thinks they're taking so much. I mean, you see what the government is. What is it? It's a play, it's many things. It's a place where you can see uncensored comedy. Like YouTube, like specials? Sure, you can put anything on there.

1:07:07I put a lot of clips on there that are... Oh, the fun, the fun. That are too idiots. Basically, but I just ask for your email instead of your money, because I just want your email for when I tour. So, yeah, I post clips up there that will get flagged by Instagram, and I'm not super provocative, but these are just gonna get flagged, you know? So I post clips there and I post all my dates there and I collect emails there so I can And I don't spam you. I just want to you know have your email So when I'm coming to your city, I'll tell you it's geolocated So you can use zip code and I will be like hey come to your city this week or something But I love what he's doing.

1:07:41It's nice to have like a free speech platform That's not run by a right wing lunatic Because then just like we're like it's free speech and then you log on some of these and it's just like the n -word and you're like This isn't really what I wanted hot dogs and jujokes Yeah, I'm all the way down. Yeah. And guess what? I got a lot of jujokes too and they're not hateful. So they're a little hateful, but they're about me. Self -hating, Jew. Different. Summaryl, ladies and gentlemen, do appreciate the heck out of you. Thank you. You too, man. This was fun.