"RE-RELEASE: Will Ferrell”

23:19Yeah, yeah, I just, and then. And quaking a little. And then my friend Roy was the director, like, okay, let's stop there. Harry, I don't know if I'm feeling, you know, just giving the cliche acting notes and like, Harry, I really want to feel it from you this time. And you're speaking to no one but Carol right now in the scene. Okay, let's take it again. And just the starting and stopping of that. Did you do Harry when you did your SNL audition? I did, which was, in fact, I tried to do an augmented version of that. And it was so surreal because, you know, you're just in a void. You're in 8H in the studio there.

23:57God, you must have been so nervous. I would have been just a mess. I just remember listening, waiting in the way. So you guys all know that set up there, waiting by the page desk outside the doors of the studio. and hearing the person ahead of you go through their audition while you're on deck. And just looking at all the famous pictures of everyone who had just hosted. And being in the spot and the place that you dreamed of being and now you're there. And then walking out to a studio that's pitch black except for a spotlight and a camera and a boom operator and Lauren sitting in the shadows and then you just have to do comedy.

24:38Or standing. In a void. possibly. Um, so yeah, that was very surreal. I tried doing it. I don't know. Um, well, Farrell, I also want to know, like, have you ever desired to do anything? I know you wanted to be a sports announcer, right? Or sportscaster, but has, if you, if you weren't doing the thing that you're doing, not quarantining, but in entertainment business, what would you be doing? If you had to pick a blue collar job, you had to pick, what would it be? Oh, blue call. Because I was going to say, I've always wanted to do finance.

25:14Sean Hayes:I just love it. It seems so interesting to you. I love finance. I love figuring out like a second more, you know. Sure. I can't even do the bit because I don't even know the terms. Right, refi. Refi, low. Will comes alive. When you mention private equity, it's like. What? Who's that? Are you subprime? Is that still a thing? I actually could be a post person, to be quite honest. To deliver the mail. Because I like the idea of a route, and you get to have some contact with people, and the idea of finishing a task every day. Would you be on foot armed with the dog spray, or would you be in the buggy?

26:05I would go foot with the trolley. I'd push the trolley. Nice. Yeah. Nice. Those are sneaky tricky, those three wheels things. They will go over on you. I'm sure they, yeah, in a high wind. Yeah. Or if you don't take the letters out, you don't go in a clockwise or counterclockwise rotation. If you take too many out of the left side, it's going to tip over on the right and vice versa. Did you used to do it?

26:27Sean Hayes:Hey, how often did you look out the window masturbating at the postman? A lot or a little? Only in the summer months when they wear the shorts. Look at that card. There's David. There's David. David, our postman's here. Yeah. David is going to topple. David, it's going to topple. I'll get the mail. Hey, guys, David's here. Yes, what? Wait. Cut to the reverses. Nobody's there. Nobody's there. He's alone. Hey, Bateman, quick question. Because you did, we mentioned before you grew up in showbiz. We all know that. We've seen the great things, and people who are listening can right now Google up, like, Little House on the Prairie and see cute little Jason Bateman.

27:08Sean Hayes:Yeah. Did you ever have a real—did you ever have, like, an outside show business job? Have you ever had, like, a— I didn't, and I genuinely hate that. I'd love to have had a paper route similar to Dave's route with his three-wheeler. But you were working all the time as a kid. I started at 10, yeah, so there was no chance to. But I've always legitimately fantasized about waiting tables or bartending. There's something about working for a tip, which is sort of like the same thing as I want them to like me. I want this table might need something different than that table. Just sort of like being able to morph into whatever they need me to be.

27:46I have I will say this. All my quote unquote civilian jobs, I've been pretty terrible at. So because you didn't like authority or you were just disinterested. You're bored? No, like slow. Yeah, just like slow on the uptake. I had a lot of patient managers and supervisors who—

28:04Sean Hayes:Did you have a lot of jobs? Like, do you have weird jobs in high school that you did? I never—I was doing sports all the time. But I had, you know, I had like the—I worked as a bank teller. I was a valet parker of cars. And— How were you taking direction? Well, you know, bank teller, you know, there's certain protocols and procedures you have to follow and this and that. It just took me a while. I mean, the fact that I was handling numbers and money, I was like, what am I doing here? The finance lost. I mean, that led to my love of finance. But I once had a regular customer stop me in the middle of a transaction and say, can you call your manager over?

28:48And I said, sure. And I brought her over and in front of me, he said, this guy is your worst teller okay and i just want you to know this and he did in a very calm way and he was like look look at him right now he's sweating and i literally was i was sweating he's like he's terrible he takes forever he um and and the manager to her defense was like please that's that's not true and i was like no he's kind of right and uh um and i just want you to know like i hate when i have to go to his window and then he just walked away and she was like i'm sorry about that. I was like, I, you know what? I can't really argue with him.

29:26There's a, I'm not that great at teller. This was counting bills, counting out cash or, you know, everything cashing a chat. Yeah. Do it all.

29:36Sean Hayes:Um, so that guy did you a favor in the long run, right? In a lot of ways, sounds like you need to pen someone a letter. Well, every time I go, every time I put the pancake makeup on and, uh, I picture that guy and I say, who's laughing now? So you still do all your own makeup? I insist on it. It's crazy. Well, there's allergies. Especially in the post-COVID-19 world we're all about to step into, I will definitely be doing all my own makeup. So Will Ferrell, you are one of the funniest people on the planet, if not the funniest person on the planet. And everybody kind of, do you get sick of like, because now you're a parent and you have to show up to like school things and parent things for your kids do people expect that from you all the time and what is your reaction uh there is um there is a certain level of underwhelmment is that a word yes yeah it is now i can tell i can tell there are a lot of let down people continually but will i will say this you know I don't even remember this a couple years ago maybe last year we were having dinner I was having dinner with Richter and Pete Giles and you and Viv came in from a school event with a couple other parents and Will was wearing his name tags and Will says hello my name is Will on the thing which is great and that's such a testament to what a great guy you are and it's like yeah man I'm not here I'm just here because my kids are at school here and I'm interested in my kids and their lives and their school.

31:19But I'm sure you guys face the same thing. I find more that there are some parents who literally won't say hi because they go so far the other way. I don't want to bother them. So then you're like, hey, how you doing? And they walk right by and they're like, gosh, what? Did I say something wrong? Yeah, yeah. And then do you feel on the opposite of that, do you feel that you have to sometimes lead with sort of a vibe that is less than sort of friendly or less than sort of solicitous of conversation because you're afraid that if you seem too friendly, they're really going to lean in? And how do you kind of...

31:57I would say, no, I would say that, I would say at least in the school setting, most everyone is relatively normal. I would say that posture, that's my game face for when I'm on a commercial flight. Right. Just sour. Don't come near me. I will rip your head off. I will. Not here. Not here for fun and games. Let's get to flying. iMask and headphones. Paragold has Luxury Home's largest selection of outdoor furniture, lighting, decor, and more. Discover pieces in every style for more than 2 ,000 of Design's best brands. Shop in-store or online at paragold.com. Paragold. Luxury lives here. Some flavors can only be crafted by nature.

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33:14Stand still, not a chance. You're a lifelong learner who's come this far. Now we're here to help you keep going further. Capella University, what can't you do? Visit capella.edu to learn more. Will, is there anything that you haven't done that you want to do? Either a role that you want to play or... Nope. Talk to you later. Totally satisfied. How do I turn this camera off? how do i get out of here how do i how do i no there isn't because everybody thinks you can do anything i don't know but how do you how do you you can't give that answer without sounding like a jackass right what yeah what would you what would you do if like uh let's say let's say ridley scott came to you and he wanted to do uh uh uh king lear and he just thought he sees something in you that would just be like an incredibly, it's off brand and studio's excited and all of those terms and all of that stuff.

34:16And the money's just like, like you've never, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Does your douche meter go off and say, even though you could do it, do you feel like the audience will never accept it? Yeah, I think that would be a, that would be a tough one to try to convince yourself that you could pull that one off. Having said that, you have... Oh, King Lear? Are you about to... No. Jason, are you doing it? No, but you have... But what about, in all sincerity, I think you've taken what you do and you've pushed it into so many realistic, dramatic, melancholy things that truly nobody else could do, just like no one else could do what you do in comedy.

35:01I really think it's admirable how you are so aware of how you come across, what sort of your goalposts are, and what you're asking the audience to accept you as. I think that's a lot of discipline. I appreciate that. But yeah, I mean, it's fun to do that other stuff, but there are times where I am always on those sets of more serious things going, this is very hard. and this is hard to not look like you're trying to be the actor who everyone needs to take serious so it's a it's a drama face yeah it's so it's so tough which is so funny because doing doing what

35:46Sean Hayes:you do specifically what you do well is so is so hard and when i say not many people like nobody could do it and it's so working out you mean yeah just the way i work out well just lats the way you do arms and legs. Yeah. Nobody does legs like you. And you've always said that. And thanks for the posts. You always post them too. Not a lot of people know that we'll train Reggie Bush when he came through SC. I'm a fairly modest person. I think you guys, I think that comes across here. But I will not hold back. No one does legs the way I do. You know? I mean. Leg day's a holiday in the feral household.

36:29leg day is yeah it's just now here's the other thing will ferrell you know you're you're also known not only as the funniest person in the world but one of the kindest people and everybody in this business always just raves about what a great human being you are that's the hard part i can attest to that because that's what they pay you for yeah that's the part they pay you very very sweet and but so that said i think the thing i always wanted to know what really pisses you off Yeah. Here we go. This is where we start the interview. Ooh. He's all kombuched up. Now, do you mean, oh, I'm full of, no.

37:04Sean Hayes:We just want names. We just want names. Yeah. When's the last time you just screamed your head off and let somebody had it? Yeah, because I can't picture you angry. No, I don't get, I'm trying to think of the last, I mean, I have screamed before. I have screamed in a professional manner. or like in life or like at home or like within people and human beings what pisses you off yeah home it's you know the typical frustrations uh you have with your children uh and for some reason i'm always checking myself because i'm holding them to some standard that i don't think i was held to like i was i was i mean i did well in school but i still had you know my room was a mess and i've i never emptied the dishwasher and uh but for some reason i'm just like you guys yeah you it's not that hard we're asking you to empty the trash see if i was your child i would laugh at that and put the liner back in put the liner back reline the trash can you're not done It's a two-step process.

38:15Right. But that, for some reason, I get crazy, and then I'm like, who is this person?

38:23Sean Hayes:Yeah. But I was going to say about holding them to that standard, you know, during these weird times we had the other day, Archie, our 11-year-old, was on his Zoom class. Yeah. And it turned out he had his camera off, and on the side he was on his iPad playing a video game. so I said to Amy I said to my ex I was like I was like what are we he's on the thing and blah blah blah and as I was saying to her like he's on the he's on the zoom class but he's on pause and he's playing a video game beat beat beat I was looking at her and I go which I probably would have done if given the chance and you probably would have too and she's like yeah I totally would I know yeah exactly it was crazy I don't uh I don't know why yeah I don't know why I go there but uh I have one other thing.

39:10I don't, in a work experience kind of bugaboo, I don't love the unit publicist experience on a set. Right. And for those listeners who are wondering, there's a lot of times on a production, there's a publicist assigned from the studio and this and that, and they're always playing the game of like, so-and-so's willing to do it if you are, and then... Right. Guilting you. Yeah. Yeah, and they do these wide circles, right? They just do little drive-bys every once in a while to gauge whether you're in a good mood or a bad mood. You just want to kind of run something by you. And I'm always amazed at we want to have 20 journalists visit the set and do a three-hour interview while you guys are filming.

40:01And I'm always like, but wait, isn't the movie the first priority? and I'm always like, absolutely, if we have time. Okay, but when do you think will be a good time? You'll have to check with the first AD. Okay, but is there a window? I have no idea. So you're up for it? Yes, if we have time. Okay. Great, so you've signed off. If we have time. Right. And then I love those days when there's no time and you just walk by and you go, I'm sorry, there was no time.

40:33Sean Hayes:Will, what was the thing I remember you were telling me once about, kind of felt like the same thing. Somebody said to you, hey, we're going to do a golf tournament. Tiger Woods is going to come if you're in. And, like, you felt like somebody had told Tiger that you were going to play. And it was like. Yes. Yes. Somehow my dad became a middleman. Oh, it was your dad? My dad somehow became a middleman. He was asking me. he had some friend of his down in Newport Beach who came to listen to him play music was like, hey, so he's talked to Tiger Woods and Tiger Woods is in for it. If you and Tiger Woods play golf together and they'll raise a bunch of money for charity for another twosome.

41:21So you're a foursome together in these two, whoever, you know, it goes to the highest bidder to play golf with Will Ferrell and Tiger Woods and that he's already reached out to Tiger and it's good to go and I was like well dad who is this friend and how well do you know him and uh he seems like a good guy and uh and uh and I go well you know a lot of times they'll ask one party before they ask the other and uh so maybe I'll check let me do some research and for some reason some way I had some way to check to see if the Tiger camp had ever heard of this special charity golf. Dr.

42:00Sean Hayes:Miller got involved. Exactly. And it turns out, of course, Tiger, I said, Dad, guess what? Your buddy, Tiger Woods, apparently his team has never heard anything of this. And your friend's lying to you. And he was like, how could that be? And I said, I know. That's the way the world sometimes works. What kind of music does he play? He's like an old-time rock and roll. Really? Yeah. Guitarist? No, he's piano, sax, Hammond B3 organ. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Let's hear it for the Hammond B3. That's amazing. But, yeah, that was my Tiger Woods story. I always loved that idea, though. I've thought about that so many times, the idea of, like, when they go, like, hey, we want you to do this thing, and so-and-so and so-and-so are doing it.

42:57Sean Hayes:And I always think back to that story of, like, and then I'll go, Ellen, why don't you make sure that so-and-so and so-and-so. That's how I found myself on an island with Marie Osmond and Kirk Cameron, you know? Oh, boy. I got asked to play in another charity golf tournament by a friend, and assuming that I was going to play with the person I know. Right. Only to show up and be placed with four strangers. And these guys were like in it to win it. And they're like, hey, hope you're pretty good. Did you end up playing? Yeah, I had to play this entire 18 holes with these four guys. And they wanted to show you how good they were, right?

43:39A hundred percent. They're like, we hope you're good because we win this thing every year. And you better be funny. Well, it was early SNL days, so they kind of had heard of me, maybe not. They were like, is that show still on the air? I didn't even know people watched it. Sweet. He sounds sweet. And then I literally, we were supposed to be a banquet afterwards. And I said, guys, I'm going to go put my clubs in my car and I'll meet you back inside. Just drove home. And did we win? Yes, we won. even despite you really you didn't stick around for the trophy i didn't stick around that's strong yeah so as we say goodbye to you and this in this pandemic day what what do you do the rest of the day uh let's see it's uh three in the afternoon i'm gonna go uh i might go i might go walk our dogs peanut and cosmo right so that's with a mask they'll be with a mask um I'm going to do a sweep through the house to find where all the devices have been hidden because these kids are liars and thieves.

44:52And so I'll do a sweep. And then we'll start talking about what we're making for dinner at around noon every day. So we'll have to start. You got to build a day around that. And then it's sleep by eight. Yeah.

45:09Sean Hayes:Jason, have you done, or Will, or Sean, well, not to your kids, but maybe to Scotty, have you ever done a thing where you go, you're so had it with the devices? I've threatened during this pandemic a minimum 100 times to throw the devices in the pool. Yes. I said, this iPad is going in the bottom of the pool if I see it on one more time. Yeah. Yeah, but then you quickly realize all that means is more work for you. Yeah. Yeah. True. I did throw my 13-year-old Matias' phone out the window. You did? Driving, all of us driving. But it was a real slow crawl, and I picked a target area where I knew we could find it later, and I just chucked it out the window and hit this bush.

45:57And he literally was like, what is wrong with you? And he was so shocked that I actually did it. And a typical true to form. We pulled over. He's like, I can't believe it. Burst into tears. Went back to look for the phone. He's like, I can't find it. I can't find it. I walked right up to the bush. I'm like, here it is. It's right here. And so that was a great little shot across the bow. What you're capable of, right? Don't mess. What I'm capable of. But it hasn't been much of a deterrent. Yeah. So. Well, Will Ferrell, thank you for being here with us. We love you. You're our comedy hero. Thanks, you guys.

46:38So much fun. Can't thank you enough. It was very, very nice of you, Will. Ugh, Willie. Bye, guys. Love you, buddy. Bye, Will. Thank you. Guys, that was so fun. How awesome is he? He literally is one of my favorite people in the whole world, and I was a little starstruck there for the first few minutes, but, God, he puts you at ease, doesn't he? What a nice guy. You were starstruck when I came on or when he was on? No, sorry. Arnett. Oh.

47:02Sean Hayes:Oh, sorry. When Arnett was, yeah. Sure. Good for you, dude. Good for you. Dude, I'm just like, I'm a regular guy. I'm very approachable. Farrell is the best, isn't he? I had the honor and pleasure and good fortune to work on a couple things with him. And they were some of my fondest memories because most of the time we just screwed around. And he's one of those guys who you go, oh, no wonder you're a superstar because everybody wants to work with you because you're one of the nicest people in the business and incredibly talented, right? Yeah. He's got that, as you know, you guys know, he's got that natural timing that you cannot learn.

47:40Sean Hayes:You just have it or you don't. And he has got it in spades in ways that are... Yeah. He's got that thing that makes him... He's so surprising, too. Yeah, always. He just surprises you with stuff. It's just awesome. Is there anything you guys learned about him that you didn't know? Certainly about his dad. Yeah, isn't that interesting? and all the sports journalism stuff that he was excited about early on right it's crazy i've met his dad a few times and i guess i didn't really realize his dad was a musician i don't know how for the righteous brothers i mean that's crazy yeah uh i did not know he was on saturday night live oh yeah that was you didn't know that wow yeah no you got to go back and look at some of those but you were you hosted a couple times while he was on the show sean i never i don't look behind me.

48:29I don't look behind me. I just look forward.

48:31Sean Hayes:Oh, okay. I don't know how that's applicable in this case. Sean, I'm very proud of you that you got Will Ferrell to say yes. Do you have any sort of incriminating photos or does he owe you money? How did you do that? I have a couple. No, I don't have anything. I can't think of anything. Okay. All right, guys. Love you guys. I love you. Hey, guys, I just want to say bang. Smart. Less.

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