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0:01I got the part of Rosie Webster in the Webster family in Coronation Street when I was nine. And then I really grew up in the show. We were the same person, really. However, I wouldn't have had an affair with my schoolteacher. And I remember when I was 24, I had Matilda. Before then, I was like, you know, YOLO, if I die. But suddenly, this baby really needed me. And all of a sudden, that was like, wow. I think sometimes we feel like as women you're supposed to try and have it all. You can, but something's got to give. Yes. You can't say, for example, have run a beautiful home yourself, be this incredible mum that remembers strawberries for their break time and have a booming career.

0:43One goes. What would you say to yourself five years ago? I would just say you are so much stronger than you think. Today's guest is Helen Flanagan. She is best known for playing Rosie Webster in Coronation Street and she is now a single mum bringing up three children. We talk about the struggles of motherhood, the realities of it, but also all the love and goodness that comes with it too and we really hope you enjoy it.

1:16Helen, hello. Welcome to the podcast. Thank you for having me. We are so pleased to have you. And I need to start by saying that my mum is a huge Corrie fan. Ah, that's so lovely. She is going to be thrilled that I'm chatting to you today. I actually want to start kind of with your role on Corrie because you started in the public eye at such a young age. I did, yeah. Were you nine? So, yeah. So, I remember, yeah, I got the part of Rosie Webster in the Webster family on Coronation Street when I was nine. So, yeah. And then I really grew up in the show. So I've never known any different, really.

1:54So it has always been my life, I suppose. And when you got that part when you were nine, I mean, I can barely remember being nine. But do you remember how you felt? Like, were you just excited? It was a really, really big deal because, you know, I'm from a very northern town. I'm from Bolton, Coronation Street, you know, very much so. Especially like when I was younger, I was born in 1990. you know coronation street was i mean it still is huge but even more so then it was massive yeah and i think if you're northern as well it was like a religion you know it was almost like tea bath bed and then the corrie theme tune would come on you know i remember my nana was absolutely over the moon when i got the part it was it was a huge deal like it was it was massive so yeah i remember I remember I really remember it and it being like really exciting and my mom taking me to Tammy Girl to get a new outfit oh my gosh I remember I thought in 92 and said this is like my my childhood as well like oh my gosh so you've got a new outfit my mom got me this top from Tammy Girl and it said groovy chick on it or something and then I remember like having my pictures with Sally Webster who who I love so much Sally Dinova I adora um who played my mom we had these pictures And it was like, I just remember it was like very, very exciting.

3:16Did your family ever talk to you about the fact that you would be in the public eye at that point? And like what effects that might have? No, no, not at all. I think it was very much like my mum and dad were thinking, oh, well, you know, this is, you know, nice for our Helen. You know, we don't know how much it's going to last. You know, I did think they, I didn't think they wanted to get my hopes up. They didn't know like how it would be. and then then as I got older you know then storylines started to increase when I was 14 and I started to get really good storylines I was so lucky um I used to get really good storylines from being 14 then I was like half and tutored at Coronation Street and then half at school and then it just kind of intensified really so I was so fortunate but I think also when you are kind of given an opportunity like that at a young age it's all you kind of know so like kind of I think when I stepped out I left the show when I was 21 and returned when I was 26 I think it was only kind of when I maybe had time away from the show and I was thinking oh wow like you know you can really see like how amazing that was to be brought up in the show like that and sometimes you well you can't compare it to is as if you didn't have it because it's all you ever knew and yeah you were on it from to begin with from 2000 to 2012 which is yes yeah yeah and then I left in 2012 I think though also with my character so obviously being an actress but the character of Rosie Webster, we were the same person, really.

4:36I was Rosie and Rosie was me. Of course, because that's how you grew up. However, I wouldn't have had an affair with my schoolteacher. And I didn't really like it when they made the character a bit bitchy, really, because I'm not. I'm really soft. But obviously, yeah, of course, I played Rosie Hubb. I would basically play myself in any situation. But I think you do that as an actress anyway. There's always a part of you in any character, you know? Definitely. We have to draw on something, don't you? Yeah, yeah, there's always a part of you with every character. What do you think, like growing up in that environment, kind of what impact do you think it had on you?

5:10I went to private school eventually because I did get picked on for being on the show. And I remember my parents then, you know, put me into private school, which I was able to pay for with, you know, with Coronation Street and what have you. so you know obviously gave me lots of opportunities but I think my family just kept me really grounded and I didn't really go anywhere really I went to Coronation Street went to school I was with my parents and I had really nice friends at my new schools do you think I'm really sorry you were bullied though that's horrendous it's just like like like more like a like a you know a childhood thing and also I think as well from being younger I don't know if it was just the show I'm ADHD PhD I think maybe being neurodivergent as well um I remember my daughter Matilda she's just going to secondary school and I was like oh I felt like really worried about her going to secondary school because I was thinking I don't want to get picked on but she's much cooler than me she's much cooler than me she'll be fine no when when you were around that age though there wasn't social media obviously like there is now but what was it like with people being able to have an opinion on you so when I was growing up as well um I used to get when I was a teenager I used to get people saying really mean things about my skin so I really struggled with like acne so I remember going oh you know that Rose Webster she's so spotty and then I remember it's funny now when you think about it but it'd be like the end of the world for me I'd have all the older actresses being like it's fine down your beautiful I'm like oh my skin um you know but I did I I had like I remember when I was about 16 17 I had like horrendous acne and it was like I remember being feeling so self-conscious of it but um I think being in the public eye as well it gives you a tougher skin yeah and I think in ways I have a tougher skin from being in the public eye but I think also you have to be I think being a little bit mad helps as well you have to be you have to be yes You have to be.

7:09To cope with it. To cope with it. And also just kind of, I think, being a mother as well, having, you know, you don't sweat the small stuff. You always think, oh, my children are fine, so everything's fine. Do you feel like you've had to build your own identity outside of being an actor? I know you said that, Rosie, and you were kind of like, you were merging slightly and you brought a lot of you to the role. But so that people knew you as someone else, like other than your character. Well, what happened is I actually, I left Coronation Street. I did end up going back. But I remember I, shortly after, a few months after I left, I saw a job to do The Jungle and I was terrible at it.

7:49I was like really bad at all the trials. So I didn't mean to, but I ended up getting a name for myself as not Rosie, as Helen, because I was so bad at the trials when I was a celebrity, because I was so bad at them. So I then did, but that was harder to cope with. Was it? Yeah, I think so, because it's when almost social media started then and people weren't as kind as you are now. And it almost was a little bit like it was weird. And it was simply like I was getting judged for me and not as Helen. But all these situations as well. I mean, I look back now and I just laugh. You know, it's quite I think, you know, it can be quite funny.

8:30But just makes you so much stronger. And just, you know, you do build like a resilience to things, you know. Yeah, you've already touched upon becoming a mother and what that means to you. I know we've been talking off camera about it as well. I think we're going to take a little break before we jump into when you became a mum and all about finding your identity.

8:53As someone who's currently pregnant, I am fascinated by women who are already incredible mums. And I know you've spoken about how much you love being a mum. Did you always want to be one? I absolutely love being a mom more than anything I really really really do I have always wanted to be a mom actually Have you? Yeah always I think I've been broody since I've been about 18 I remember asking my first boyfriend for a baby And he was like no I've always wanted to be a mom Like I always have And then I remember I was with the father of my children From being 19 And then we split up just before I turned 32 and um yeah we planned our first Matilda did you but I always wanted a baby from being like 19 and he was like oh no I'm not ready and then when I turned 24 we then uh we then planned out Matilda and when you had her did it feel natural did it feel innate like as soon as you became a mom were you like this is what I'm supposed to do yeah I absolutely loved it like I really really did but I did struggle though like it was like further down the line for me with postnatal depression with Matilda but it was strange it almost kicked in coinciding with the breastfeeding so I had like I struggled really badly with OCD and postnatal but it was almost like when I was finishing breastfeeding.

10:18Was it? So was that, how many months was that? When did you kind of finish breastfeeding with her? Like a year? I think it was getting on to eight months. When I finished breastfeeding, I got almost the postnatal OCD kind of then. And then I think I was in a bit of denial about it a little bit because I didn't want it to look like I was struggling. but I think it's so great um and it's you know it's it's a natural thing that happens with hormones that you know we speak about it because it's you know women should never ever feel on their own about anything like that and then I didn't have it with Delilah but then I did have postnatal with Charlie but I got that pretty much straight away actually but it was more like OCD so I'd get like OCD introduced his thoughts with Charlie which I really struggled with but then I recognized what was wrong with me and then I was able to like get get some help for it quickly and then then I understood what was going on that's so thank you for talking about it because it's so interesting that you've had such a different experience with each of your children that and I think some people think postnatal depression happens very very quickly afterwards and the fact that yours happened when you kind of were transitioning away from breastfeeding is so interesting hormonal as well yeah can be sometimes when your hormones are a bit like everywhere but I do think it's really important for you know it absolutely does not make you any less of a mom you know it's your hormones everything you know and suddenly I think when you become a mother as well it's the best thing in the world but then all of a sudden you yourself become really important and I remember when I was 24 I had Matilda before then I was like you know YOLO if I die you know like you know you just kind of like you know you're so carefree yes you know and I was I was I suppose more of a younger mom but suddenly I was I had this baby that I loved there was no words for how much I loved this baby and then I was suddenly this baby really needed me and all of a sudden that was like wow so I think that then actually having that sometimes that's when like things like postnatal OCD can come in because I remember them being like it's a lot and I think the love as well can be quite overwhelming you know do you because um the whole there's a lot but it does it does start because I know you're pregnant it does calm down and it is wonderful I promise you I'm fine I want the truth I want the reality I'm all good but it is amazing like honestly being the mom is is you know it's it's really hard but it's the best thing ever as well and so it's so worth like everything do how much change in your life because everyone's like everything changes did it feel um did it feel overwhelming or did it just feel right that like obviously like your day-to-day changes a lot I remember I was really overwhelmed with my first because I'd never changed a nappy before yes I was the first one at my friends and like my siblings to have a baby um I remember when I had her I you know I'd never even bathed a baby I remember the midwife being like do you want me to bath it I was like yes please yes please and then I remember I would just like stare at her and i was like i remember even like i would even putting her in a baby grows i was like oh you know because she was so delicate you know but then by third you're just there like that you know doing it in your sleep chuck a nappy on them you're absolutely fine well actually i've never changed a nappy i've never bathed a baby but i've got my my uh in-laws coming sick not my in-laws my like this is baby brain isn't it you were asking yeah baby brain i mean i was a baby i've got a baby nephew coming that's what i've got next week for like a week and he's like three months old so I think this is like practice time that's perfect because then you can just be changing nappies but and it just it does actually make you just feel like more comfortable but when my sisters had babies they were just like they were so much more like because they were so used to looking after Matilda so you know it just but for me I did feel overwhelmed but then with buying my second and third that kind of overwhelm when I think it's you just get a bit overwhelmed I think with you first you know yes I think anything new but yeah you've now got three children how do you think you've changed because you're a mother oh I think when you become a mom as well I think it gives you such a strength as well when you're a mom like it gives you a superpower because you just think I can overcome anything because I'm a mom and it just makes you it gives you a strength like it just gives you this like an indescribable strength that you have so you you can always get over or do anything because you're a mom so it's yeah I always feel like you're like a little like a like a lioness with the cubs really I think when you become a mom that gives you perspective if I've had challenges in my life I just kind of think to myself my kids are fine everything's fine um yeah that no one's actually everyone's full of full of advice but that strength point no one's actually said it does it gives it gives you like fire in your belly yeah it does yeah that sounds great yeah it does um you work for yourself and you do lots of different things but you're also looking after three children and you were saying earlier they've all got different like activities that all that slightly different age how do you balance that with your work so i i'm a single parent um obviously that that their dad is involved um i always say to the father of my kids he can see the children whenever he wants but unfortunately like he lives away but i always say like he can see the children whenever he wants um he's actually taken them to Dubai uh for half term and they'll absolutely love that I I do have them I'd probably say about 85 90 percent of the time um so how I do it is I do it with my mom and dad um they are like really really supportive I I've been so blessed well I haven't got a husband I've been really really blessed with my parents like my parents are amazing they're very very supportive with work because in a way I kind of had to like start again really uh when I separated for my long-term fiancé.

16:11So they've always been, like, really, really supportive for me, like, any kind of, like, work projects or what have you. Oh, having good parents, like, that's incredible. Yeah, my mum is some woman. Is she? She's amazing. She's, like, super grandma, though. Like, she doesn't just, like, help me with my children. She helps me with, like, all my siblings' kids as well. If she wants to come help me, then I'm mum open to it. My mum's not normal, though. She's nearly 70, and, like, the energy she has, I'm just like, wow. She sounds great. Yeah, she is. We used to be more like Helen's mum by the sounds of it.

16:39She's, yeah, she's something else, yeah. Now, previously you've spoken about the importance of having your own career and earning your own money. Yes. Where does that come from? Is that from your mum or? I think it's really important for women, you know, to always be independent and have their own money because, you know, it gives you choices. And, you know, I think it's so important. So, so, so important. and obviously when I became a single parent as well I absolutely needed to work so yeah I don't think women should always have their own bank account own money own independence no matter what yeah you never know what's going to happen no you don't you don't and it's so and so so so important and I hope in a way you know you're never going to be a perfect parent I I have a relationship with my daughter where I always say to her so say for example if I'm a bit kind of a bit moody or I'm a bit like you know a bit more snappy I always apologize to her but I always say to her mommy is not perfect but she tries and one thing that I always want my daughter to see is that you know mommy works really hard because I really want her so much to be um you know empowered what what does like a happy home or upbringing for your children look like to you um so I think my children's childhood they you know they have nice times with their dad their um and their other nana and I think they enjoy their time there and then they have a really happy fun time with me and and then they have a lot of love and stability as well for my mom and my dad and my my sisters and all their cousins and stuff so yeah and I I just think now I don't think there's any you know there's no certain way of how you know for a happy childhood to be happy it doesn't have to be you know mom dad you know it doesn't have to be that you know you can still have a really happy childhood if it's not you know but it's you know typically definitely I think there's so many different ways for like a child a child to like be content enough and it's not it doesn't look a certain way what have you found being the most supportive around other than you've spoken about your parents but are like are friends really helpful what does your kind of network look like to support you I think it's really nice how when you speak to other women and other mums where we're just really honest and we're just like oh you know um I feel really bad because oh um you know I didn't have as much patience today or you know if you're really honest about parenting I think that can make you feel less on your own and those are my people I don't pretend my life is perfect or that I'm a pervert and I think that's nice you kind of feel feel that you know and um I love my social media as well I do because I feel like you can really um you can really uh like engage with women as well and that yeah do you feel like being honest on that about some parenting struggles etc and do you feel you've got a community there that kind of help you out I've always been really honest on my social media and actually I don't I I'm very much myself yeah on my social media I don't actually pretend to be anything that I'm not I literally just I use it like a bit of a bit of a form of self-expression and I think I think basically probably what that is and why I like to I think I probably for maybe being a child actress and then always having kind of maybe more like kind of control of how your image is I really like to have a form of self you know expression my social media but yeah when I was very much in the depths of motherhood when they were really young you know I did very much like kind of talk about my like kind of struggles on there um yeah which I think is great I mean as women you know we we need to be supportive of each other and I'm very much a girl's girl yes I love women very much girl's girl me too now you've touched upon almost kind of having to take on the load yourself of being predominantly a single mum um I want to dig into that a little bit deeper so let's take a quick break before we before we delve into that if that's okay when did it first land helen that you would be doing like the main child care or looking after your children like when did you realize that so i separated with the father of my children i'd say about over four years ago and that was very difficult because i was with him from being 19 to nearly 32 so that was just all my 20s were with someone so it really did take its toll on me I kind of that came to a realization with that when he signed for a club that was like um five six hours away from our house so I kind of thought wow this really is on me and then at the time I was um I would like pay for nannies when I worked and what have you to give me support then my mom ended up kind of like stepping in more eventually was it the fact that he was um he was playing for a club really far away would you have ever moved was it just like you didn't want to actually about a year about year and a half ago i did say i did say to him shall we bring up the kids because when matilda started to go to secondary school i had this thing going where are we going to bring her up in secondary school so shall we because obviously a lot of my work is in London and so we did have this thing where where I was where I said to him shall we shall we bring up the children south shall we shall we do this in London um but then to be honest with you I am so close to my mom and my dad and without going into too much detail we couldn't come to any kind of agreement so it just basically came to the fact that like I'm bringing my children up where I'm from now so and it's home isn't it I kind of want that stability for my daughter as well so I want to really see her through secondary school and then if I want to move to London I can but I don't want her to having disruptions yeah I want things to be quite calm for her see her through and then if I need to just means that I'm constantly back and forth to London like a yo-yo but you know how she's happy she's happy how do you deal with that because that's a lot I get tired but you know you just get on with it because you've got no choice you just get on Was there a moment where, or did it happen over time where you kind of went from like, oh, I am really there everything now?

23:07Oh, I think that comes as soon as you hold the baby in your arms. If you've got one, two or three, I think as soon as you hold your baby in your arms, you're like, I am suddenly important. And you really, before you become a parent, you kind of kind of a bit like, well, it's just me who cares. well when you become a parent suddenly you're like oh wow this little baby like needs me like I they need me and suddenly you start taking things seriously and everything starts to become important and I remember I started taking interest in things I wouldn't usually take interest in and but then it's it's amazing incredible but then sometimes things do become quite um you know serious and you do think of your own mortality as well you're like oh because this baby like really needs you yeah it makes you think more seriously about yourself and did it make you a better person do you think i think i think 100 being a parent makes you a better person i think it makes you kinder as well i think it makes you so much kinder um i also think as well being a single woman and then i mean i don't really want to go too much into dating but i think i suppose it makes you kinder in that way it makes you kinder as a person you have more compassion for people yeah i think you care more about people and you you kind of think with a guy you think well that's someone's son and with a with a girl you think that's someone's daughter you think you think differently i think it makes you kinder oh that's so nice to hear because i also have to say um the only people that give up their their seat on the tube or the train is other mums i swear you know like if you what other men haven't done that no that's horrendous only if you walk into a like quite clearly pregnant the only people that are like bam it's the it's clearly women who have been mums i would be really horrified if i saw a man not give up his tearful i mean i i couldn't i'd have to say something i don't know how like obvious i would be i know i would i'd be horrified i would say i'd say excuse me she needs to sit down but it's like there's a row of people and i'm like who am i going to pick on do you know what i can't bear what i absolutely cannot bear because i have traveled so much with my young children i always used to travel to dubai with when they're really small is when people oh they're the worst people as well complain about a crying baby when a baby is crying and then the mom's getting through the stress you can see she's getting her up and she feels into pressure honestly that is that is my worst and I have to say something to that person I have to I'll have to stick up for that we could go on a whole different tangent yeah I mean really could going back to being a single mom and you're very open about it And what are like the other implications that maybe you don't think about?

25:43Like going like financially taking a bit of a hit and going from dual to more of a single income. Like what, what, how does that feel? Was that really stressful? So I wasn't married. I was engaged. I was with someone for 13 years. We were engaged for a really, really, really long time. And the father had a good job. I genuinely like I was really in love with him from being a really young age. And I really loved him for him. um but I suppose I mean do not get me wrong I'm very much um for women empowerment and I'm definitely feminist in lots of ways but really and I don't think I think everybody's different I don't think there's anything wrong with me saying this but I was very much happy for my career to take a back step I really love the father of my kids I was happy to put his career before mine and what was more important to me to be honest with you was getting married and having children that's what I wanted and so really I really put his career first put my I always worked but kind of never really I wanted to support him really I loved him and I would kind of put my acting career on the back step and I was having children from a young age and my priority was more him and the children so it really was a lot when we separated because suddenly it was almost like right okay I'm kind of need to start over again really because we weren't married so financially things were different um so I I yeah but it makes you stronger and you're a mom you just have to get on with it so that's a lot though and by the way I think thank you for being so honest because I think sometimes we feel like as women you're supposed to try and have it all in the career but to be able to bring up children really well and to have a full-time like intense job I don't know of the two are entirely compatible like it's really hard to like i think you can i think you you can but something's got to give yes you can't say for example have run a beautiful home yourself be this incredible mom that remembers you know strawberries for their for their break time and remember and does all this homework and have a booming career it you kind of one one goes yes so at any one point but it can shift right i like to think i'm a brilliant mom and i'm a great career woman but I am terrible at running a house I was terrible yeah but you can't you can't do everything yeah do you think um being the one that your children kind of mainly depend on how has that made you feel about your own health and looking after yourself yeah I do get a little bit of health anxiety to be honest with you yeah I do a little bit like I'm very up on looking after myself more um I you know I love to have a drink I do but I always make sure that I don't drink too much because i want to be really healthy for them um i like to exercise i remember i mean this sounds awful now but i used to smoke actually so i used to smoke before i had um matilda and as soon as she was born as soon as she was born i was like i never touch anything whatever again really yeah it was just like a switch like no i'm not taking my health for granted no i'm not doing that i mean don't get me wrong I'm such a girl's girl and I don't judge bear it more than mothers that smoke you know each to their own but it was just a personal experience I remember I was like I am I'm not I would never do that so I do take my you know health seriously I always make sure I go with like my you know the cervical screen yes all those kind of things all those are like really important because you know I want to see my children hopefully you know yeah you know I want to be a grandma myself you know I want to see all of that and you want to be there for your children because they need you for as long as possible.

29:18So you are really important when you become a parent. As a mum, have you got anything in place, if anything would happen to you, like life insurance? It's something that I'm definitely going to be doing. I think I've kind of been putting things off a little bit. I don't want to go into too much detail about things like this, but I think I've had so much to kind of sort since the separation and stuff. But now things are a bit calmer. You know, it is definitely something that I want to be sorting because I am responsible for three children. and then it's also you know god forbid if anything ever happened it's almost i wouldn't want anything to be put on say my parents or anything like that yeah yeah and i think it is something that so many of us put off there's so much life admin to do these days isn't yes yeah yeah there is yeah and it does get really overwhelming i mean i'm definitely an adhd girly as well so you know sometimes we do we do forget about these things but they are really really important and you know our children are our everything you know yeah yeah so if anything did happen to us then you know securing that like financial security is really really important yeah and I mean it's like house insurance car insurance all of it I mean it all does feel like a chore so I think it's no wonder and I think especially uh if you've got ADHD that stuff feels more overwhelming yes yeah yeah it does oh gosh yeah I mean I um I mean I'm I am riddled with ADHD I definitely have but I I think in a way though like I mean I was diagnosed with ADHD as well you know before like people didn't really talk about it were you quite young I was like 16 so it was like when you know people I think it was someone at Coronation Street that said it to my mum actually I bet she was thrilled oh it's funny though yeah at least I'm not boring no exactly exactly and we look we all I think you say in your bio you're neuro spicy don't you yeah yeah which I love the way you've put that yeah yeah yeah no definitely yeah but I like I like that you know and you know you can use it as like a bit of a superpower as well but I think as a mom as well I always feel like I think when you when you are neurodivergent and you're a parent when you're a mother or father but as a mother and sometimes you can feel like I can be a bit more forgetful or a bit more disorganized but there I can be like really super loving and super of fun as well you know has anything changed about what you've kind of sorted out in your life since you've taken main responsibility for your children that's a really hard one because i think probably since the separation i've had so much to try and sort but now things are kind of calm this is why i'm thinking of the the you know the necessities and practicalities of life insurance all these things that my children need but i've had the the the past few years have been probably a bit chaotic for me really what would you say to yourself five years ago um what advice would you give them for before the separation happened what would i say to myself five years ago i would just say you are so much stronger than you think as long as the kids are okay everything's fine you've been through quite a lot and what is the one thing that you want other women other mothers to take from your experience who are maybe feeling a bit stressed about their situation right now um I think just like always be true to yourself and I think that's really really important to be true to yourself and I think you know there are so many good people in the world as well and kindness is everything you know like but also I think it's being true to yourself and you have to be brave I think you really have to be brave be brave be true to yourself I love that thank you we're going to take a really quick break and then I want to talk about life ahead thank you Helen I want to ask you about looking ahead now you're in like a slightly different place you say the chaos has kind of calmed down a bit how do you feel about this kind of next chapter yeah I think I very much want to focus on my career I've got something exciting coming up which I'm excited about can you share I don't think I can yet actually but yeah no I'm really excited about that so i'm very focused on that but also just i'm so i'm very much a mom mom so like you know i'm so focused on my children um i'd love i'd absolutely love to i mean i'm a romantic i'd love to eventually get married my mom would kill me for saying this but i would love to have another baby if i found the right if i found the right one yeah yeah but if if not then you know But I would want to be married and yeah.

33:56But if not, you know, then I'm incredibly beyond blessed with the three children that I do have. But I do love being a mum. Well, never say never. Never say never. I think that's nice as a woman always to say never say never about children as well. And then you never kind of feel that, you know, it's my last or what have you. Yeah. I think it's always nice to never say never. I can literally feel it from you, though, like how much you adore being a mum. And it's so lovely. I don't I don't think everyone feels like that I don't know and like it's clearly so important to you yeah no definitely but I think like there's no right or wrong as well with being a mom I think you just find your own instincts I'm definitely not a perfect mom in lots of ways though but in lots of ways I've got lots of strengths but you know like like like I said I've got ADHD so I'm not very organized and um you know I can forget things and I feel bad about it but I like to think that I've got very strong bonds with my kids and that I'm fun and very loving.

34:53What would you, what do you hope your children learn from like watching you? I hope they are brave. I hope they are brave. I hope they really go for things. I hope they are kind. And yeah, especially with my eldest daughter, I hope she always has her own independence and that she, she has that. I don't want them to kind of put them off not being in love. I think that's really important for them still. I still want them to have really positive feelings about romance and love and marriage and those kind of things. Because I think that's really important. That's so important. Is there anything that's worrying you about coming up?

35:33Like about, I mean, you said that your oldest Matilda, she's just gone to secondary school, hasn't she? Are you stressed about like social media or anything like that? I think that's part and parcel of being a parent. as amazing as it is you always have so many worries all the time about uh parenting and stuff I think definitely with secondary school you know it's like different crowds things happen when hormones come in everything's a bit of a change um I think I think it just I mean obviously my children are only eight eleven eight and five but I think it's the word I think the older that they get the more worries you have when they're in their 20s and what have you and then you know I don't think as a mom you ever stop worrying I mean I know that with my own mom and what would you say to another mum who is trying to you know build her career but also look after her children yeah what would you say I think just don't give yourself a really hard time like some days I find sometimes I'm an absolute mess like say for example I came to London and my house was just an absolute tip was it yeah and but then I thought you know I'm trying my best I think it's almost being kind to yourself and also sometimes I think with social media that we can consume I don't follow accounts that make motherhood look really easy I don't because for me I find that quite triggering because then I'll compare myself and think why am I not this together and what have you especially if you've got ADHD so I think you know be honest be kind to yourself and you're only one person there's only so much you can do I think when you have a young baby as well I used to think I need to do this in my day I need to do this no don't don't do a to-do list just take a step back and just go okay I've got a small baby it's fine I remember sometimes thinking I put some scar on today and that was a better thing and it's fine because you will get your pink back you know how they say and you will feel yourself but you know when you're in your baby it's not putting all this pressure on you and I think being careful of all the social media that we consume about unrealistic um at least stupid unrealistic pictures of motherhood is an absolute no yeah I think it's so refreshing to hear someone say especially someone who like is you know you've got so many followers and like to hear you speak about social media so candidly and also like don't don't curate your feed in a certain way that makes you feel bad like no I think I'm very much like myself I mean sometimes I mean you know I'm very much like I'm a northern glam girl you know I you know I am single so I like going out more and what have you and I get I get a lot of um nasty comments maybe about what I wear so say for example I wear a corset um and I think that's really mean as well because like I think you know just because you're you're a mom you're still a woman and you can still feel sexy empowered and beautiful and I think when people can say mean comment comments I get sometimes because of my mom and stuff and I I think that's really mean because we, you know, we're a mom, but we don't lose our identity or who we are, you know.

38:27Well, I'm going to have to end this interview by asking you a question. I'm obviously about to become a first time mom. What is your one absolute core piece of advice for me? Really enjoy your baby bubble because you can't get that time back and just really enjoy every, every moment. And the newborn smile is the best. and also just be really really kind to yourself and there is no right or wrong you know what's best for your baby no one else will know what's best for your baby and i mean even though midwives are lovely and they don't your your own mum your friends it's it's you and just trust those instincts because you know and there's no right or wrong there's no right or wrong whatever you do whatever you do will be right for your baby because you you will know better than anyone oh helen thank Thank you so much.

39:14This has been such a lovely, warm conversation and honest too. So thank you so much for being just yourself and being authentic. And I think this will help quite a lot of women listening. So thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thanks.

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