🗽“Biberty or Death”— In-N-Out’s burger brokers. Apple’s eating Big Tech. Liberty Biberty’s worst mascot. +Potty Parity

0:28This is Nick. We'll get you on stage, hair and makeup. But Jack, we got three fantastic stories for today's T-Boy. What do we got from today's show? To be clear, we're not giving you hair and makeup. For our first story, Liberty Mutual built a mascot that's so hated, it's actually uniting the country. America's most disliked mascot reveals something bigger about humanity. For our second story, Apple is doing three times better than the rest of big tech in the stock market so far this year because of the one thing Apple did not do and because of Beyonce. And our third and final story, Burger brokers are a thing now.

1:02They're charging$225 to deliver in and out to your doorstep. Because sometimes the nicest thing you can do to a customer is be mean. But besties, before we hit that wonderful mix of stories. What a mix of stories. I love seeing you here, Jack. Fantastic mix. This is our first year where we've done a live tour. And tonight is our last show of the year. The last show. It's wrapping up. It's sad. We're playing the show box in Seattle, our biggest stage yet. Which leads to a big question. Does this venue have potty parody? The Ha-Potty parody is the way to use the bathroom the same for men as it is for women.

1:34Now to sprinkle on some context, women's sports has been having a moment for quite a few moments now. WNBA's champion Golden State Valkyrie sold out the Chase Center every single home game this season. ESPN just announced a 14 % boost in their female viewers so far this year. And women now make up 47 % of NFL fans. And yet, the average woman at a sporting event in this country is waiting online at a stadium restroom for six minutes. minutes. Well, the average men's line is 11 seconds. Wow. Six minutes for female, 11 seconds for male. That, besties, is some potty disparity. Now, the reasons? Well, on the one hand, women do take longer.

2:10Yeah, they do. 180 seconds in the restroom for her compared to 84 seconds in the restroom for him. The other hand, urinals take up way less space than stalls. As the dudes who got more real estate to relieve yourselves. Nick Wrigley Field in Chicago. Yes. Nayland Stadium in Tennessee. I know where you're going. The Indy 500. My dad took me there when I was 11. I was peeing in a communal trough. A trough. Across from like 11 fully grown men. Yeah. Half of our audience doesn't know this, but men pee into communal troughs like we're cattle at old stadiums. It's like a giant bathtub and everyone just squeezes in as many can fit.

2:43Nothing comparative for women out there. Nor should there be. So the Minnesota Vikings have flexible restrooms in their new stadium. They switch gender based on the ticket sales demographics. Taylor Swift concert, make them all female. While the LA Clippers new arena has more than 1 ,400 toilets. That's an abundance policy every party can get behind. And the University of South Carolina football stadium has a new two-to-one ratio of women's restrooms to men's. Because nothing kills rosé sales like a bathroom line. Potty parody. Yes. The surprise live sports theme of 2020. I gotta go check. What's in our three stories?

3:16Got 11 seconds to hurry up. I can do that. 15 years before this song, two boys from the Northeast met in the dorm. They had an idea to cause a cultural storm. It's the best one yet, but the best is the norm. Jack Nick, that's it. I don't even think they need to practice. 50%, that's a fat tip. T-Boy City on your at-list. If you know, you know, cause we ready to go. We can't wait no more, so just start the show.

3:44Start the show. First, a quick word from our sponsor.

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4:56That's ZipRecruiter.com slash tboy. Meet your match on ZipRecruiter. Monarch. In 2015, after my third banking bonus, I finally paid off my student debt. Then in 2019, after we sold our startup, I finally paid off my graduate student debt. Yeah, is everyone throwing random parties these days? Well, Jack threw a long overdue debt payoff party. Gotta love that party. Yeah, because for 10 years, I kept a manual Excel spreadsheet tracking my debt payoff progress. And it was very satisfying watching the bad numbers get smaller and the good numbers get bigger. You see, when you're paying down your debt, it helps to have a target date to plan your celebration around.

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6:02For our first story, one day after the midterms, one thing has united the country in disgust. Liberty Mutual's new mascot and ad campaign gone wrong. Or gone right. Oh. Liberty Biberty is mutually assured annoyance and it's worked to unite the country. Can you say the name one more time? I'll say it many more times in the story. You see, Eddie, here's an actual sentence from an actual Liberty Mutual press release. Liberty Mutual is launching its first new character in eight years. Now, besties, we've covered this bizarre quirk of the insurance industry, right, Jack? Differentiation by mascot. Why is an insurance company launching a new character?

6:40Well, because insurance is a remarkably simple business model. Here's the business model. Maximize monthly premiums you charge customers, minimize the payouts to those customers. Boom, you get a bonus. So simple, a caveman can do it. They were talking about the business model. Yes, they were. And the byproduct of a non-differentiated product like insurance is commercials. Since insurance is not visual, it's a commodity, and your choice just comes down to who offers the lowest price. We get Lil Emu and Doug, Flo from Progressive, and Jake from State Farm. And from Geico, we get geckos, camels, and squealing pigs.

7:16And every Aflac duck in between. But there's another strategy to the insurance industry's obsession with fictionalized characters in their commercials. What is it, Jack? They signal financial stability. You see, if they can afford this expensive ad, maybe this insurance company can afford my claim when I get rear-ended on 95. But this year, Liberty Mutual crossed the line. Oh yeah, because their new character was Liberty Bibberty. Yeah, the new character referenced in the press release from earlier, it's actually a creation of Jim Henson's Creature Shop. It's a fuzzy yellow ball-shaped puppet with the same green crown as the Statue of Liberty.

7:50And it was invented by the same people who gave us Kermit, Miss Piggy, and the cast of Sesame Street. And here is another quote from that Liberty Mutual PR team. Liberty Biberty is the embodiment of the warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you have great coverage at a great price. Okay, according to their chief marketing officer, 40 to 50 % of their marketing dollars since July have been on these Liberty Biberty ads. So they're betting the whole farm on this character. Yeah. Which is funny because people absolutely universally hate it. Aw, it looks like a spitball rolled around in snot. It talks like a nasally congested sick person who just sneezed on you.

8:26It's giving Gremlin had a baby with Butterball vibes. Actually, let's let you decide in Triggerboard, because this is going to be a nice. Let's hit the tape. I'm Liberty Biberty, and I'm here to tell everyone it feels great getting great coverage and savings on car insurance with Liberty Mutual. All right, turn it off, turn it off, turn it off, Jack. Besties, the hate for this character, fictional, has gotten demonstrators to show up outside Liberty Mutual's office in Boston. To demand the end to Liberty Biberty. One person posted on Instagram a new tattoo they got? What's on it? Of Liberty Biberty, this fake mascot, being processed through a meat grinder.

9:00This is a tattoo they'll have for the rest of their lives. The sports reporter Grant Bisbee, who's watched so many of these commercials over the sports season this fall, said, I will put Liberty Biberty in the freezer to settle him down a bit and then drop him alive into boiling water. Jack, what has been Liberty Mutual's response to these borderline concerning threats? Very concerning threats. Yes. We're encouraged by how strongly people are engaging with Liberty Biberty, whether they love him or feel differently. According to the exit polls, besties, the biggest problem in America is actually Liberty Biberty.

9:31So Jack, what's the takeaway for all our Biberty Aiden buddies over at Liberty Biberty? The worst outcome from an ad is indifference. Indifference is the enemy. Yet is this Liberty Biberty mascot, it's tapped into something much deeper that never could have been predicted. Because do we all really hate this mascot as much as we say we are? Or do we just have a desire to connect with people on a shared feeling? Because the anti-Liberty Biberty movement, it has united millions of people, and Liberty Mutual is responsible for that and getting the benefit of that. It committed a victimless creative crime that actually brought us together.

10:06Beautiful. Shared annoyance for a snotty fluff yellow puppet. You see, besties, maybe the goal of advertising isn't a positive feeling. Maybe it's just feeling. Bonus if that feeling is shared with other people. Because the worst outcome of an ad is really indifference. Best outcome, especially in our isolated and polarized world, is a feeling of community. Oh, bippity, get out of here.

10:33For our second story, Apple is beating and eating the rest of the mag seven stocks by three X this year. Why is Apple the best stock of 2026? Not because of anything it did. It's what it didn't do. It chose not to run. Exactly. Yeah. You see, Eddie's Apple, they actually just announced their most quiet earnings since the mute button was invented. And yet, record Q3 revenue. Wow. Record profits per share. Wow. Record China sales. Oh my. They even launched a foldable iPhone. Wow. And yet, the stock fell. The reason? The cost of memory chips are skyrocketing, which is going to crunch future profit margins.

11:13But the bigger picture here, what is it, Jack? It's actually from my wedding song. Holy moly, me oh my, you're the apple of my eye. Which you sang, I want to point out. You see, Eddie's Apple stock, it's up 24 % this year, twice as good as the S &P 500's 11 % return. And Apple's gains this year is twice as good as NVIDIA. Apple even briefly reclaimed their crown as the world's most valuable company this week. Want to sing us another lyric, Jack? That was Alex's. Alex got the lyrics. That was her, yeah, different stanzas, different stanzas. But besties, we know what you are wondering. Why is Apple beating the magnificent seven average by 3X so far this year.

11:48Well, to quote Beyonce, the iPhone is irreplaceable. I knew you had another lyric in you. Beyonce was our other wedding song. Yeah, I know. We're doing the whole playlist tonight, Jack. Yetis. Q3 iPhone sales for Apple rose 17%, and that only included eight days of the iPhone 18 sales. Sure, the iPhone Duo is cracking, but the iPhone Duo 2 is probably going to be a best sell. iPhone's growth, it's even more impressive if you compare phone sales to the rest of the world. Because the number of smartphones sold globally is down 22 % this year. But the number of iPhones sold globally is down just 4%.

12:19And iPhone revenue is up because they've been jacking up the prices. Remember earlier this year, Apple raised the price of all their hardware by 100 to 300 bucks. Americans are more price sensitive than ever. They're fed up by inflation more than ever. And yet they're not skipping their iPhone upgrade. To the left, to the left, everything you own in an iPhone box to the left. Now, we are hanging on to our iPhones longer than we ever have. Four years on average as of last quarter. But it looks like we'll cut anything from our budgets before we cut out a new iPhone. Take my eyes, just don't take my dynamic island.

12:52That doesn't count as a lyric, but we can count it as a lyric. Jack, so Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies over at Apple? Apple is winning the AI race by not participating in it. Yet he's back in our January 30th podcast. asked, we described the bull case for Apple stock with this very question. Why build an AI factory when you can rent AI instead for way cheaper? Well, Apple stock's up 24 % since that episode because it's the one Mag7 company that is not in the AI race. Meta, Microsoft, Google, Amazon, they're each spending between$100 billion and$200 billion this year on data centers.

13:29And Jack, how are all these companies paying for their AI CapEx spending? They're printing new stock, which dilutes the stock price, and they're borrowing money at very high interest rates. Meanwhile, Apple's spending just$9 billion on CapEx, and they're spending it on Apple stores and office buildings. Zuckerberg is dropping 43 % of Meta's revenue on CapEx this year. Apple is spending just 2 % of the revenue. Instead of building AI factories, Apple's just renting Google's AI instead. If in five years we still own iPhones and we're satisfied with Siri's AI smartness, Then Apple will have won the AI race by not participating in it.

14:03I choose not to run. I choose not to run. Now, a quick word from our sponsor. Him's hair. Yetis, when we get on stage for a live show, the number one thing we're thinking about is confidence. Yes, we do the whole look in the mirror thing and pump ourselves up Jack Donaghy style. I think it's the Super Bowl of podcasts. Look good, feel good, play good. Our hair, it impacts how we look. Confidence is also not having to think twice before you take a photo or take off your hat. Well, HIMS is built on the science of regrowth, like the super special ingredient finasteride known to stop hair loss and another ingredient known to regrow hair.

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15:06Prices vary based on product and subscription plan. See website for full details, restrictions, and important safety information. Nutraful. Yetis, a lot of people talk about their morning podcast routine, but we prefer to call it a ritual. Same meaning, but more epic word. Totally. When it comes to keeping my hair thick and full, I religiously take four Nutrafol pills with my breakfast every day. For Jack, the religious connotation of the word ritual is on point because he's praying to keep his hair. Not just praying, Nick, also science. True. Nutrafol is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand.

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16:07That's Nutrafol.com spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L.com promo code T-B-O-Y for 15 bucks off. For our third and final story, why are people paying over$200 just to get a hamburger delivered from In-N-Out? Because sometimes the nicest thing you can do to a customer is be mean. Oh, wait, one sec. You hear that, Jack? You hear that? McRib alert. The McDonald's McRib is officially back on the menu right now. And it's already getting sued. Yeah, there's a Chicago lawsuit that - Spoiler! The McRib sandwich is not actually rib. What is it? It's restructured pork patty, but that's the most known secret on earth.

16:45Everyone knows McRib is not McRib. Oh, man. This is part of a bigger issue. McDonald's is getting squished, but so is every big burger chain right now. McDonald's stock's down 15%, Burger King's flat, Shake Shack's down 25%, and Wendy's is down 70%. All the burger chains are getting cooked right now. But while the national burger chains are getting beaten, regional burger chains are getting eaten. Whataburger is growing in Texas. Culver's is expanding in the Midwest. And the top of that patty pack is In-N-Out Burger. Sales rose 10 % in 2020. Ah, In-N-Out, the cult fave California-based burger chain with palm trees and Bible verses on its cups.

17:20And here's the news. The CEO, Lindsay Snyder, granddaughter of In-N-Out founders, sat for an interview randomly with the actor Terry Crews. That's not the news, but that was kind of cool. Well, we told you a few years ago that In-N-Out was expanding east of the Mississippi by opening a regional headquarters in Tennessee. And now we know that the next In-N-Out locations are in Arkansas, Mississippi, and Oklahoma. But here's what Nick and I find fascinating. Why is In-N-Out going nationwide if people will pay$200 for one burger in their home state of California? I'm sorry, pause the pod. We saw that small detail somewhere and we had to jump in T-Boy style.

17:54Californians, which is where In-N-Out is based, are ordering In-N-Out delivery, but on Craigslist and Facebook Marketplace. Wow. And they're paying hundreds for There is one TaskRabbit in Santa Clara, California, who charged$225 to deliver just two cheeseburgers. That's a 20X markup. And yet In-N-Out saw none of that$225 delivery. Well, actually, they saw the$20. And the reason In-N-Out does not see the remaining$20 of that charge, they refuse to do delivery apps. Besties, what we are saying here is that demand for In-N-Out delivery is so high, a borderline black market has emerged. Burger Broker.

18:30Burger Brokers. It's actually a job title. It is. Tell the IRS. I mean, Jack, if people in In-N-Out's home state are willing to pay a 20x markup for delivery, like, can you imagine what would happen on the East Coast? Unfortunately, we can only imagine. Because In-N-Out refuses to accelerate their expansion plans. They're basically growing like a tortoise. Like a tortoise without a passport. So why is In-N-Out not giving customers something they so clearly want? Delivery and East Coast locations? Why won't they let us go animal style? Jack, what is the takeaway for our buddies over at In-N-Out?

19:01Sometimes the nicest thing you can do for a customer is the meanest. Yeti's In-N-Out is turning down short-term delivery sales boosts because it's aligned with their long-term principles. They don't want soggy burgers to become the standard or to become anyone's experience. And they want you in stores because the vibe of In-N-Out is part of the product. If you've been in In-N-Out, you know what we mean. And explaining the slow expansion, the CEO said this, we want to be the same no matter what state we are in. We've seen putting principles over short-term profit lead to long-term profit before.

19:34Yes, we have. Jack and I have seen it with Trader Joe's, which does not do online ordering. We've seen it with Chick-fil-A, which is closed one out of seven days a week. And we've seen it with Ferrari, where they famously make less cars than the market demands and will make you wait as long as you want, no matter how much money you have. They've all decided not to give the customer what they clearly want and are willing to pay for in order to preserve the brand's bigger value. And that friction, it makes the product more special when you finally do get it. That's why it's special when you go to In-N-Out, because you can't just deliver it anytime you want.

20:03Adelol besties, and these are all rare examples of where the nicest thing you can do is actually the meanest. Jack, could you whip up the takeaways for us for Ceviche Wednesday? Liberty Mutual's mascot is so disliked, he's triggered real, but quite unserious street protests. In our book, the Liberty Biberty ad won, because indifference is the enemy. For our second story, Apple is the big stock of 2026, twice as good as the S &P 500, three times as good as the rest of the Mag 7. Apple's winning in the era of AI because it's not participating in the AI race. It chooses not to run. Not to run. And our third and final story is In-N-Out Burger.

20:42Burger brokers are emerging on Craigslist and Facebook Marketplace for$200 deliveries. And yet In-N-Out will not do delivery. They're being nice to customers by being mean. But besties, this pod's not over yet. Here's what else you need to know today. First, Equinox, the luxury gym chain, just announced a new CEO, forget this, the first time in 27 years. And they hired a beer guy. He's a beer dude. Brendan Whitworth was the CEO of AB InBev, the global beer conglomerate that owns Budweiser, Corona, Stella, and honestly, like 100 other brands. Now he's the new CEO of Equinox. And his key job, take the 118 location chain and add 50 more of them.

21:20His job description is pivoting from Bud Light to barbells. Oh yeah. From consuming calories to burning them. From keg rooms to locker rooms. Second, private liberal arts colleges are advertising that they're actually lower cost than the big public universities. Shocking update from the journal. Williams College costs 30 % less than UMass, which is right next door. Wellesley costs less than UConn, and Bowdoin costs less than the University of Maine. And down in Pennsylvania, Swarthmore is half the price to attend at Penn State. Now, how could this be? Why can Williams offer lower tuition than UMass Amherst, which has 15 times more students?

21:52Well, because Williams has a way bigger endowment, which subsidizes tuition, and they're tapping it more than ever. And finally, Binance, which suffered the biggest bank heist ever last week,$6.3 billion, now published a report on how it started. Spoiler, it was a job interview. You see, software engineer B was trying to leave Binance and applied for what they thought was a real job. But it wasn't. It was fictitious. It was an elaborate social engineering scheme with North Korea suspected to be behind it. So the interviewer from North Korea told him to download an assignment, and using his Binance computer, he let malicious code into the company.

22:27The takeaway? If you're applying for a new job, suss out whether they're actually North Korean spies. I don't know what the takeaway is. I think it's you do the interview in person, and you do bring an iced latte, Jack. North Korean applicants, they never bring iced lattes. If the interviewer tells you to download an assignment, say, I'm calling the FBI, I suspect you're a spy. Again, I don't know what the takeaway is here. That will end the interview. Or maybe they'll be impressed. I don't know. Yeah, it's a flex. Now, time for the best fact yet. This one whipped up by Jack on the flight over to Seattle.

22:58So this actually comes from my 2006 mixtape from my 1991 Honda Accord. And it's a trivia question. I feel like we're experiencing your whole musical biography in today's episode. I love this. What is the number one best-selling album in America right now? That's the trivia question. It's not Olivia Rodrigo. It's not Drake. And it is not Noah Kahn. It's My Chemical Romance. The Black Parade. You see, this year, that emo band re-released the album from 20 years ago, but it is now number one on the Billboard charts. It was never number one in 2006 when it initially was released. Back when we played it at our proms.

23:30Blame Miley Cyrus, whose Hannah Montana album was number one that whole year. But now it has, partly because 20 years later, they've issued 20 physical variants that have spurred collectible craving among fans. Their records. In the age of streaming, fans bought 78 ,000 My Chemical Romance records last week. All right, so Jack, what's the takeaway to your mixtape? People want physical collectibles to show their fandom and support their favorite artists. Baseball cards, Pokemon, eBay, all more valuable than any other time in human history. The more things get digital, the more we crave the hug of the physical.

24:02I thought you were going to sing something for us there. I choose not to sing. Yetis, you look fantastic heading into our final live show of the IPO tour. Last night for dinner, we actually hit up Din Tai Fung. We did. One of the OGs in America. Dumplings, a company that we covered on the pod last year. And that story went viral when we covered it. Also, we have to carbo-load before all our live shows. It's actually a T-boy rule. Consider me carbo-loaded. Nick, let's prep for the show. Grab your final tickets right here in the episode description. And Jack and I will bring an umbrella. And see you later tonight.

24:36And before we go, a happy birthday to legendary Yedis Porsche and Luca twins turning 13 down in Houston. Happy 50th birthday to Kristen Green in Sault Ste. Marie, Michigan. And Rebecca Kelly, the legendary snacker turned Yeti, has got the best birthday yet down in New York City. Happy birthday to Valeski Iorio, celebrating with a long high rocks challenge up in Syracuse. And Yvonne Ticamera is turning 28 years old in Mumbai, India. Went as Avril Lavigne for Halloween. Best celebration yet. And happy birthday to Jamie Donahue in Phoenix, who's dressing up as, get this, Jamie. me. No, actually himself.

25:11You see, the theme is to dress up in a blonde wig like Jamie Donoghue himself to his own party. All the guests are dressing like him. Oh, I see. That's amazing. The dress code is me. Is the host. Is the host. And Steve Ruppepe and Leah Cordy, five years after meeting on Hinge and getting engaged in Iceland, they are finally getting married this weekend and then heading off to Tahiti, baby. Congratulations, guys. And congratulations to Emil Pitkin, The Wharton statistics professor who translated his grandfather's novel about being a Jew in the Soviet Union. It's called The Penny is Gone. Translated from Russian to English.

25:47Professor Pitkin, best professor at Wharton. We are rejecting the null hypothesis and giving a probability of 100 % bestseller. I've never seen a more beautiful confidence interval. No, no, it's good. We'll keep it in. We'll keep it in. This is Jack. I own stock of Amazon. Nick owns stock of Shake Shack. and we both own stock of Apple and ETFs of the S &P 500. Yetis, this holiday season, don't miss your chance to turn just looking into just bought it. Make it easy for your customers to say yes on the spot. PayPal Checkout is a trusted conversion engine fueled by 400 million active PayPal and Venmo accounts.

26:23And when you add Pay Later, you can turn holiday shoppers into regulars. 96 % of Pay Later shoppers are repeat users. So if you give them Pay Later flexibility now, it could help earn their loyalty all year long. PayPal is built for all business. Get started at paypal.com slash business. PayPal data, eight markets, March, 2025 to February, 2026. Repeat users defined as more than one pay later purchase in the past year.