Whitney Wolfe Herd On How To Build A Billion Dollar Business, The Future Of Relationships & AI, Entrepreneurial Burnout, & Balancing Motherhood

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37:17And that's really helped me because if I treat Bumble as this like obligation or this stress or this like thing that I'm sacrificing for my babies, I'm going to hate it and I'm going to stop doing it. And that's not really what I want. I love my job. I love my career. I thrive helping build products that can change people's lives. I just treat Bumble like one of my children. And okay, I'm with this child right now. And now I'm with that child. And I just, I love, I love what Bumble stands for in the world. And I'm also a deeply purpose-driven human. I think what you do in the world changes things.

38:02It really impacts people for the better. And so when you can see that there's selflessness also in what you're doing and you're not just plugging away in a way that you hate or you feel unfulfilled, I think it can change the game. And so I always tell my mom friends this, like I have equal amount of working mother friends as I do non every mother's working. Let's be clear. I have equal amount of moms with two careers, which is one raising their children and one, you know, working, doing something else. And ones that just choose to exclusively raise their children, which I think both are excellent choices but the ones that hate their they're like their job i'm like you need to stop like don't sacrifice unless you love it switch it do something different i'm not saying quit and give up on a career but you need to find a career you love and i think this is the beauty of having children it makes you more intentional i think when you have kids time starts mattering in a way that it didn't matter before and you stop doing the like i'll stick it out for another year or i'll see how i feel in two years.

39:07Or I'll get a drink with you even though I don't know you that well. Yeah or like this does nothing to enhance the world myself my family or the world like or my life like I'm gonna say no. If I don't have I always say like I have capacity for a certain amount right now and my kids fill a huge buck of that and my business fills some and my husband and like you have a little bit of capacity left and you have to figure out where you want to deploy that and that's the season that I'm in. And some friends don't understand that and they fall off. They don't understand how, and some of them don't have kids.

39:39They don't understand having three kids under six. And I empathize with that, but you only have a little bit of capacity left and you have to be strategic with where you allocate that. So true. Emma Greed came on and gave us some good advice and she was basically talking about this and around guilt. And the way she describes it is she loves her work and loves what she does. And when she talks to her children, she says, like I love that I get to go and she said it changed the way the kids view because before it was like oh I got to go to work and it's this thing and to your point if you hate it then your kids look at like why are you going to do something you hate these you're choosing something you hate over me right but if they're like hey I love it and it's the thing I get to go do and I'm passionate about the kids like oh great go have fun Emma's incredible by the way I mean she definitely has more hours in the day than I do I don't I mean I don't know how she does it all she's amazing but I agree and you know I love that you grew up with a mother that that was working and i think for me i'm very proud that i can talk to my children about what i do and how i contribute to the world outside of out of outside of their lives but you know it's like every different strokes for different folks i judge no one it's just this is where i am now but remember i took a i stepped away from ceo i hired a ceo i want you to talk about that before before that i just want to tell you though real quick like if it means something like for your boys, I think later in life, they will appreciate what you do and it'll change their dynamic with strong women.

41:05I'll speak more specifically. A lot of men, and I could say this because I'm a man, a lot of men get really threatened by strong women, big personalities and strong viewpoints. Some men get even more threatened by women that may be the breadwinners or make a big living. I think for your boys, they're not going to experience that dynamic and they're going to be okay. Right. Because like the reality is a lot of young men are going to enter the workforce. And if you can just look at the data, a lot of women are doing better financially and are starting to do more. And a lot of guys are struggling with that.

41:40I think it's actually part of like some of the imbalance in the dating world, which you probably know more about. Oh, for sure. For your boys, like I think the example will be good. And later as they get around more women that are of strong account like they'll be more comfortable with it no absolutely and i'm fortunate that i married someone with that mindset so it's actually kind of a crazy story so in college my mentor was this woman who was my professor she was the most badass woman i had ever met in my life like i i was both scared of her and in awe of her and just enamored by her and she just took you know no crap from anyone.

42:18She was strong. She was self-assured. She was confident. She was brilliant. She was amazing. And I had this insane phobia of public speaking. Like I would never in my life have been able to do this. And one day, all of a sudden, it turns out that her class is judged on the ability to present in front of the class. That's how you get your grade. So I went and got a doctor's note obviously and i was like no like i can't i'm too scared like i have a phobia i have a clinical reason not to she ripped it up and she was like oh girlfriend no no you're gonna do this you're gonna be fine fast forward turns out she's now my mother-in-law no way yep so So years later, I meet her son, who's been raised by this unbelievable woman.

43:10And he invites me to dinner, to a group dinner. I walk in. She's across the table. I look at him. I go, why is Professor Hurd here? I go, Professor, that's my mom. And she goes, Whitney Wolf with the good eyebrows. And I was like, oh, my God. But what is happening right now? So that is the grandmother to my babies. Oh, my God. That gave me chills. Yeah, she's like the most powerful, badass, cool. Did you pass the class? Yeah, but Michael. So my mother in law is a gay woman. And so Michael always teases me that she gave every blonde an A. And I was like, you know what? I deserve that. had good eyebrows she did say i had good eyebrows so no but she said i deserved it i deserved and deserved the age so she's amazing she's maybe the coolest person i've ever met in my life and i just you know to have such a force of nature like that in my life is this is this person that's now the grandmother to my children is such a gift and i had no idea she even had a son so it was kind of amazing but to your point like he was raised by that so he respects me he respects strong women The more powerful I become, the more he he admires me.

44:24And that was never the case I ever saw with men prior. Like any sense of power or any sense of strength was such a. Like a threat to them. And obviously it's you know, it's not that's not that's not great. I would go as far to say it's a turnoff. Yes. I remember before Michael, I never got approached by anyone. We both have Michaels, by the way. We both have Michaels. Well, I think what the turnoff is for anyone, this is men and women in any dynamic, is insecurity. Yeah. We are inherently, anybody is turned off by insecurity. But here's the thing that's funny is I'm intense and I'm strong and I love to come in to my office and lay it down.

45:07but at home I'm soft and feminine and a homemaker and I love being a wife and like I'm very like very in my feminine so I think you can have both it doesn't have to be like one or the other I could not agree more I'm the same way I know I can tell with your Santa Barbara house I'm like super cozy mommy mode at home it's gorgeous where did I see that maybe Arc Digest we just sold it where did I see that though you've seen it because somebody else bought it and it's on the internet now so yeah i saw it yeah okay yeah probably okay it's a beautiful it was such a special place where you're going through every detail is that like are we like doing the base boards and like oh no not there that was a like a super vintage hacienda from like the 1800s it was extraordinary super spiritual it was a chapter okay it was a chapter we chose there we just we we chose you know i married a texan and there just we needed to choose where to anchor and we chose that that was not our base.

46:01I love it there. I love my friends there. I met the most yummy, amazing humans that will be like lifelong people. But it was a chapter. It was a season. And I think life, you know, we have these little seasons. Was your husband going nuts over there? No, he was actually having a lot of fun. You mentioned your morning routine when you were grinding, which is you're waking up at 3 a.m., you're breastfeeding, you're staring at the monitor, et cetera, et cetera. What does your morning now look like when you feel anchored, when you're tuning into your soul and not your ego now? So I really, really, really try.

46:35I've fallen off the wagon a little bit. Not to lie. You know, obviously, we all go through these ups and downs. When I'm in my best routine, I am waking up at 5.30, saying my morning mantras, prayers, my meditation. I really like to start the day by and not like in a you know religious capacity but like dear universe and then I pray for others like the first thing I do is like pray for the people I know that are going through something hard you know if someone's struggling with something with health or someone's in it I just wake up and just really say prayers for people to heal and I just wish well on people it's the first thing I do in the morning.

47:23It's a great way to wake up. And I just feel like it just gives this energy to the day that is like genuinely rooted in positive intention. And then I pray for the protection of my loved ones and I give thanks to the universe. Like just thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you for every little thing I have. And so I just say these silent kind of mantras and prayers in my head and try to be still. And if I'm really good, I'll do TM. Bob Roth will be mad at me because I was in such a rhythm where I was doing it twice a day every day. And I was like on another planet of tapped in, but I have fallen off the wagon there a little.

48:01And then, you know, I have a brand new baby. So I like to get up and go like smush her face. She's so delicious. And then it's like the day goes, but I'm, I'm kind of like you when I get into my routine, I'm like obsessed with the sauna, obsessed with the red light. Have you ever tried the immortal bed? No. Is that the one that's got the like, it's like not it's a glass and it like sits yeah yeah it looks like it's gonna mash yeah yeah they have it in aspen i just go use it at the place i know what you're talking about it's got the sound yeah it's cool so like i'm doing all these things i ordered your thing that you promoted the shift wave thing like i'm trying to do all this i have the power plate you know that shaky thing i don't know if that works she's in do all the skin stuff you should see me i'm listening to affirmations on the plate brushing my teeth doing posture exercise looking outside trying to get you because that's what you have to do as a mom.

48:48Laura's the final boss of like the morning routines on Instagram. Guys, I might be the mom boss. The one who's doing it. I know. This is you, mom boss. I think I might be the mom boss of this. Honestly, I try. I get 40 things done at once. I love that about you. Yeah, like I will have, my husband always teases because and I learned about him through one of my dear friends, Sarah Blakely, who if you haven't had her on, you've got her husband on, but not her yet, but I'd love to have Sarah. Sarah, come on the show. Sarah's spectacular. That's another person. Oh my God, there's three people you've recommended.

49:14She turned me on to Wayne Dyer, who I'm now like obsessed with. You and I are on the same frequency. Are you doing Wayne Dyer too? That is so weird. It's really, yeah. Oh, I'm like all about Wayne Dyer. That's like a very like niche vintage. It's very vintage niche woo-woo. You know what? You got to be careful because listen, you're a public CEO. That's fine. And this show, sometimes they'll come in and say, this show is getting a little woo-woo. I am woo-woo. Don't you forget it. You know what? My woo-woo made it all happen. That energy is why things move in the direction they move with me. Are you listening to his lecture or his book?

49:48Anything Wayne Dyer, I've listened to it. That is so weird. Sarah Blakely got me turned on to it. And look what she's built. She's the queen of entrepreneurship. You know which one I'm listening to right now if anyone wants to start? Turn on a little more Wayne Dyer, okay? I do every morning. Are you not listening? It's a joke. I love it. Oh, because you hear it. Excuses be gone. That's the one I'm on right now. That's a good one. But the one before was the power lecture maybe. He is so good. I love him. Woo. I mean, I don't know anything about him because I think he like predates us a little bit.

50:16But whatever I do know is just what I've listened to. And I think he's amazing. I'm assuming you've listened to Louise Hay. Yeah. Love Louise Hay. Got super deep on the telepathy tapes. I haven't heard about that. What's that? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What is happening here? Okay. Okay. Start them immediately. Like, like run. Okay. And then you need to have Kai Dickens on your show. Who's that? She did the telepathy. Okay. just you and i are gonna booboo for an hour but then the funny thing about me yeah yeah i'll do it that's perfect the funny thing though is like i can go all down this rabbit hole like you want to go near-death experiences i've read 100 books on it but then you want near-death experience i don't know i got fascinated with it and then if you want to talk business i've read every i mean i actually was never a big business book reader which ones do you think are worth reading because like here's the thing i think same as you i like i'm just kind of like i kind of stopped reading them yeah because they kind of be they all say the same thing in a different format and i'm also like i don't want to be you as a leader like i don't want to be you like i want to be me i just need tools to be a better version of me which do you like well i think there's some iconic ones that like everyone should read my mind is blanking right now on my favorite one but like there's a couple just basics that everyone should read like made in america sam walton great book everyone should read that's really more of a biography though right but in my mind it understanding the human and the way someone moves through the world that's my version of a business book like i have zero interest in reading like how to scale your business from a to z like i'm just like i i'm good yeah i'm like i'm good i know how to scale so you're good i'm i'm good we got you you could write all the books together no but but like that's just not I'm good.

52:05I know how to scale. So you'll go down rabbit holes when it comes to reading. Oh yeah. I'll go down like physics, rabbit holes, philosophy, rabbit holes, like went full obsessed on philosophy. Are you reading Wayne or are you listening to Wayne? Oh, I like to listen to him. I like his voice. Yes. Let me ask you this. Oh my God. That's so weird. This is a little bit of a gear shift. When you have the success that you've had and the headlines that you get how are you then after that able to decipher who's coming around you for the right reasons and who's looking for an opportunity i don't hang out with anybody what about your mom friends okay all my best friends i've either known okay my best best friends i've either known since my dearest friend in the world is my best friend from summer camp when we're 11 amazing okay so she's my number one she actually has an incredible jewelry brand And she's her name is Jesse Lazowski, Marlo Laz.

53:05If you haven't seen her stuff, it's to die for. She's so amazing. She's incredible. And then, you know, my other best girlfriends are like just true blue mom friends or my best college girlfriends I hang out with. I have like a pack of 10 people that are my ride or dies. And then I just have like wholesome, cozy family friends that like my husband and I are friends with the mom and the dad and we're friends with the kids. I kind of keep to myself. Do you think it's harder? to make good new friends because of the profile or do you think no i'm super not like that like i don't really care if someone wants to be friends with me because of bumble and they're cool and funny i'm like god bless like well let's go like i mean as long as they're fun like i'm in that stage of life where i'm like if your vibe is hilarious cool connected fun like use me if you want to like listen to wain dyer must listen to wain dyer but i'm not i'm just not like that i'm like pretty chill i'm not really guarded i i don't really think i'm anything special if that makes sense like i have a lot of friends that have started businesses and they like roll with security and they like super like important like sunglasses in a lot of places and i'm like i'll just roll through the pharmacy or the grocery store i'm like no one knows who i am no one gets a shit like not one person cares about me that people don't come up to you all the time they they do but not Not in like the way you would expect.

54:31They come up to me and they're like, this is my bumble baby. That's cool. And I'm like, I love you. That is so cool. You know what I'm hearing throughout this interview is you've really mastered the science of achievement and the art of fulfillment. Because with the art of fulfillment, you get helping people fall in love, which what's better than that? And you're a bumble baby. I mean, that's very fulfilling. But you also have the science of achievement with your career. It's so fruitful. you've really got them both i never thought about it that way but i think you do too i i do feel that i have that because the podcast is to me is fulfillment and my product line is yeah i think like it's a little different it's amazing my company and by the way you've changed my life with the mouth tape so let's just put it out there well we're that's you hear that yep no no and i and the eyebrow personally the most excited and fired up is like when people will come up and say some area of their life was changed for the better based on something they saw or heard.

55:27But I'm going to say it's cool that Whitney has a bumble baby. You know what? I will tell you the thing that does keep me going because let's just be real, like work gets worky. It gets worky sometimes. It's the success stories. It's the people that tell me, I mean, you can't even imagine the stories I've heard. It's the stories of people who have come back from grief, met the loves of their lives, have multiple kids, never thought they would ever meet anyone. Now they're thriving. Crazy story, actually. When I had Bobby, my first son, here in Austin, delivered him in Austin, I got super, super scary postpartum preeclampsia.

56:07Ended up back in the hospital. And they were like, touch and go. God knows what's going to happen. It was quite scary. And this nurse came into my room and she kind of felt like an angel, but she was real I've confirmed and she told me that she and by the way if anyone can find this nurse I want to speak to her so if anybody can locate this person please bring her my way but she told me that she had to break HIPAA and come talk to me because she heard them talking about me at the nurse's station bumble girl I probably sent like cookies or something you know like I was always doing something for the nurse station she said I had to come talk to you because And she grabbed my hand.

56:44She goes, I was in an abusive marriage for decades and I read about you and I read about Bumble and I read about why you started Bumble. And so I got the courage to leave my husband. And when I got back on my own two feet and felt strength again, I downloaded Bumble and I have never in my life met anyone with his name before. and I had to come talk to you because he's my fiance now and he's the love of my life. And when you go back to the hospital with a motherhood, like a newborn, like a mother-related illness, they actually take you back to labor and delivery. They don't put you in normal ER or ICU.

57:21They take you to labor and delivery and monitor you there for infection reduction, all that. So I was back in labor and delivery and you remember having your babies, they write mommy's name and baby's name out on the door. and she said his name is Bobby Lee and that's my son's name because we named him after my husband's grandfather so I was like okay if that's not a testament to keep going and just like like you just got to keep on going when work gets hard that's a sign that's a sign read the book signs I cannot wait to read that is a huge sign yep speaking of Bumble I think we'd be remiss what is going on from your perspective reading the data running a dating company what is going on in the dating world a lot of you if you read the headlines there's a lot of doom and gloom a lot of people saying they're giving up younger people not getting into intimate relationships getting a little too swipey swipe i mentioned on a show that people are concerned about people procreating is like are not having as many babies and that society is going to be crumbled because we're not procreating and like what are you seeing and what is the data show from your perspective The demand is 100 % still there.

58:31People want love and connection. That has not left the building. It just has not. I think the way in which they're able to find love and connection is not serving them in a way that it used to. I think the swipe has, and I admit to this, I'm super self-aware and we're reinventing ourselves and we're building new features and functionalities. I think this like mass availability of mass people at all times at the tip of your fingers, it has burnt people out. And it has gone from being what it was meant to be, a dating app, which would insinuate what? Gets you on good dates, right? And then if the date goes well, hopefully that turns into a relationship or something fruitful.

59:15Right now we're calling ourselves the love company because Love doesn't have to be marriage and babies, but we want to put more love into the world and we want to bring people together face to face in the real world. And so what we are doing right now is to to meet the demand of people wanting to meet. They're desperate to meet. They're doing anything. I mean, they're literally setting up these little clubs in their area and trying to meet people through anything like they're willing to go back to church when they're not even religious because they want to meet people. That is the craving of the fabric of society right now.

59:47It's like people want to meet people, but they don't know how because of a few things. Thing one, social media has completely desensitized everyone and disconnected us. We are living through these like alternate realities of what's real. Dating apps probably have played a role in this too because we were meant to be a dating app, but it turned into just this like swipe, swipe app where like you were just swiped into the abyss, right? Or maybe you got all these matches and they just never went anywhere. These dead end chats and ghosting and all of this heavy like rejection layered with judgment.

1:00:23And it just kind of taxed people. And so I see it as my duty. And this is part of why I am back is I'm a problem solver. And I'm certainly not going to leave the industry in the state that it's in right now, which is not in a bad place. It's just in a moment. Where it needs evolution. It does. Because it's not bad. It's not broken. It's not dead. I mean, I think Wall Street and the media are being super overreactive and way more pessimistic than they need to be. Partly, that's kind of the role they play in the world. So where I think things go from here is I think we're at the most interesting intersection I have personally ever arrived at in my career, which is where AI can just supercharge human connection.

1:01:08So we are absolutely going to transform the way people meet. We are leaning into bringing people together through groups, through events, through in the real world. So my big vision for Bumble is in five years from now, every single person can meet someone through Bumble, not on Bumble. Maybe that's at a Bumble event. Maybe that's in a group. Maybe that's through a group date that you went on. A girlfriend of mine was telling me last night, she's dating someone right now that she met on Bumble. And I was like, oh my God, like, where'd you meet and where'd you match? She goes, well, I didn't. She said, I matched with this friend and I went on a date with his friend and his friend brought him.

1:01:47But we clicked. Me and my match didn't click. And my match realized that me and the friend clicked and was like, you two have something going on here. Now they're dating. So I believe that success in numbers is the next frontier. And so we're really focused on building capabilities that are AI powered. so it will be like as seamless and as efficient and as non-exhaustive as possible to get you on our products bff which is doing very well with gen z in particular and bumble date to then get you offline to a safe meetup as quickly as possible we just want to bring people together in the real world and tell me what is more powerful in this era of ai where we are really replacing everything and automating everything than human connection it's funny like we're doing and carson knows this as a company like this is a digital company we produce a lot of digital content but we're doing we're this year we're doing the first one in may and we'll do another one later we're not announced really yet but we're bringing people off line or like offline together because i think it's so important the company's like why doesn't your media partner with Bumble.

1:02:58Yeah, let's do it together. Yes, you should do something. But to your point, I see what's happening here and I'm like, why? Every time we do these events and I see everyone there and there's a happy hour and they're talking and they're connecting, the digital content should be a reinforcement and a tool to help you interact in the real world. Amen, my friend. Right? Not like, you shouldn't live in a bubble online. No. They weren't designed that way. You know, I got a lot of, and I'm sure you dealt with this too, when COVID happened, everybody went remote and slowly, but surely I've been kind of enforcing and making people get back in person.

1:03:32And like, listen, people kick and scream about that. I want the flexibility. It's like, no, I want people to connect in life with each other. That's why you end up caring about something. That's why you end up caring about people, like staring at a screen. Remember when we were doing those happy hours on the screen, on the Zoom? Horrible. So one of the most depressing times of my life is sitting there having a whiskey, looking at a bunch of screen. I won't get on a video Zoom. Everyone gets so mad at me. I get text messages say get on video zoom i won't do it i'm not gonna stare at a screen the zoom happy hour i don't want to do it either one of the most depressing times in human history we're all sitting alone in your house drinking looking at each other on the i completely agree um i think like reminding people that like hey we're designed for connection and to be around each other right like and you can use a tool better together we are better together it's genius though to use ai as the tool that it is to then get the connection, which is the meat of what is needed.

1:04:26So let's talk about the other reasons you decided to come back. You left, you stepped down as CEO, you brought in another CEO. Yeah. And was it you wanted to - I mean, do you want the real reason? Were you sitting around wondering - You're not going to believe the real reason though. I might. It's a little woo-woo. Yeah, it's true. No one knows this story. This is the show to do it on. Go ahead. Okay, you want the real reason I came back? What's the story? Okay, so here's the real deal. I was very happy and I did not want to be a ceo again. I was loving I was living la vida loca. Okay, I was having a great time.

1:04:57However, I am I'm an entrepreneur. I don't know what to tell you. I mean listen If someone's a painter Just because they get tired doesn't mean they're like never going to paint again This is who I am. I need to build I need to solve problems. I need to create I need to put things into the world It is who I am. However, swear on my life, I had no intention of going back to Bumble. And I love, love, love the woman that was our CEO for a year. I think she's brilliant, remarkable. She, for her own reasons, like nothing bad, like nothing weird, truly, decided it was her time to go. And she was like, I'm just like, this isn't right for me right now, whatever.

1:05:44And I think she's brilliant. There was no falling out. we keep in touch I think she's lovely but I was like okay well I mean I'm not the same I don't think I can go and do this again like I don't know if I can just like go back this this isn't really what I wanted for my life right now I had kind of like had this itch to start something new I was like thinking of new companies and new products but the weirdest thing happened about a week before she let me know was I had this like crazy download, which was that my purpose on earth was basically to help people find love. So I was off trying to find other ways to do it.

1:06:25I was like, oh, well, I'll start a company for this or some company for that. Like I was thinking of all these other businesses. And I just kind of when she decided it was like the right moment for her to move on to her next thing. I felt like the universe was pulling me and just doing it for me. You started this conversation off by saying things don't happen to you. They happen for you. And I was like, this is clearly happening for me, but I wasn't convinced. So before I agreed to like really go all back in, I did what any really, really smart, sane business person does. And I I called my psychic medium.

1:07:03You got to text me that. Laura Lynn Jackson. Laura Lynn Jackson. And you know, it's funny. I have like a crazy network of brilliant business people. But before I texted them, I was like, she's my go to. I get it. So I was like, I was like, Laura Lynn, here's the deal. Like, what am I meant to do? I'm like having so much fun. I'm like starting these new companies. They're going to be billion dollar businesses and da da da da. and I'm like loving life with my husband and my kids and like, you know, doing my thing. And she goes, okay, I am getting a message from your, you know, like past one, like someone that I love that had passed.

1:07:45It's like, he's telling me to look on the back of your husband's belt. And I'm like, okay, I gotta go. Like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna call CEO. Like, I can't do this. This is getting too weird. She's like, no, like I'm being shown this like belt buckle, like a silver belt buckle with a bunch of like a like a silver like a like a scene. There's like a scene on the front of this belt buckle. And I'm like, huh? Like, oh, I actually know what she's talking about. Like a rodeo belt buckle? I'm like, oh, my God. It's my husband's like Texas rodeo belt buckle. So my husband does this like iconic like boys trip rancher, like cowboy thing.

1:08:22and whoever wins this like championship thing they put on gets this like belt buckle and I was like I think I know what she's talking about she goes okay I'm getting this persistent message you've got to go look on the back of the belt buckle the message is on the back of the but you're going to know what to do if you're going back as CEO or not I'm not going to tell you the answer go get the belt buckle and look on the back of the belt buckle and whatever is there is your answer and you will know right away and I was like okay I think I think I need to like take it down like we're gonna we're gonna like move on so I get home and I kind of forget about it and then it hits me and I'm like Michael where's your belt buckle and he's like my what I'm like where's the like the big belt buckle the silver belt buckle and he's like oh in the room I'm like go get it so he gets this belt buckle and he brings it back and it is in fact the big silver belt buckle with the texas scene on it and we turn it over and inscribed in the back of the belt buckle every single word is the man in the arena by theodore roosevelt bam oh my favorite quote it is how i've like measured my career being like just be in the arena like every day you got to get out there even if you get marred even if you're like muddied and covered in blood like at least you're not in the nosebleeds at least you're in that arena and i was like i'm going I'm back.

1:09:4191 % of dog parents say their pup is an important member of the family and 40 % would even save their dog over a human stranger. It's safe to say people are obsessed with their dog. So enter Ollie. Okay. Ollie is amazing. They're relentless about delivering the best food and experience for you and your dog. And they give you a way to check in on their health over and over again. So here's how it works. They have a food, which is Ollie's Fresh Recipes. They're delivered by a real chef and backed by a vet nutritionist. They're obsessed with making the best meals with the highest quality ingredients.

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1:13:05Quick break to talk about free nicotine. I love free nicotine. I have been a nicotine user for years and I've constantly dabbled in experimenting with nicotine as something that can help my brain focus, help me get shit done, and keep me on my game. Many are aware that nicotine is addictive and a chemical and you have to be very careful with it, but many are also unaware that it can be used as a tool for focus, for cognitive performance, and to potentially guard against brain-related diseases. They have three milligram pouches for somebody who's just starting with nicotine, six, nine, 12, and 15 for people that are experienced.

1:13:37And free exists for the ones that want to stay sharp when it counts. Like I said, I use it when I need to do this podcast, when I need to focus, when I really need to get stuff done, and I love it for its cognitive-enhancing benefits. It's also great because it comes in these discreet slim pouches for anywhere smoking can't and vaping won't and dip shouldn't. There's been a ton of high performers that have come on this podcast from Dave Asprey to RFK Jr. to some comedians, people who really want to feel their best and really focus when they're doing a show like this or when they want to get stuff done.

1:14:05That's how I use it. So if you've been thinking about experimenting with nicotine, Free Nicotine is a great company to try. And like I said, you can really control the dosage and the strength. So check them out. Try free nicotine pouches today at freepouch.com and use code SKINNY for 25 % off. For new customers only, that's frepouch.com. Again, freepouch.com and use promo code SKINNY. Introducing the Skinny Confidential Ice Roller. Reimagined. Think sleeker lines, a softer pink, a custom buttery dust bag, and a silver roller, not pink anymore, that is ice cold. I wanted to do a zhuzh on the iconic ice roller.

1:14:48I wanted to update it. This ice roller for me has always been more than just a tool. It's about helping us de-puff and sculpt and calm the skin in a way that feels intentional and I wanted the ice roller to feel evolved. It's changed. You've changed. So yes the new gorgeous stunning beautiful ice roller is still going to do the same things. It reduces puffiness and redness in your face. I used it this morning before I put on my makeup. It definitely helps with the under eye bags. Of course, it helps boost circulation and radiance. I just feel like it really helps stimulate blood flow and gives me that tighter, more radiant skin.

1:15:26And then it also is known to give you a smoother, tighter looking skin. So what I like to do is I like to combine facial massage with cold therapy. and this really helps give you a really nice foundation before you even apply your skincare. This ice roller for me is a full circle moment. I think that a lot of you bought the ice roller you know five six years ago when we launched it and now I am launching something that feels more in alignment with where you're at. It's so beautiful you guys like it's just softer and more effortless in every way. And I really put my own touches on every single little step from the packaging to the colors to how it feels to even the roller.

1:16:12It's all been elevated just for you. So the ritual, the Lauren ritual is you do cold therapy to help fight inflammation. You roll it, you glide it across your face. I put it on my jawline, my neck, I roll it down. Your skin is just going to appear smoother and tighter before you go in for the kill with the skincare and the makeup. Don't skip the cold therapy. The new ice roller is an upgrade designed to meet the standards of today. And I hope you guys love it as much as I do. This is the beauty tool that started it all redesigned to evolve with you. I'm showing it on YouTube too. If you're on YouTube, if you're seeing me visually, get it while it's hot at shop skinny confidential.com.

1:16:52That's shopskinnyconfidential.com. We prep for all these shows. Yeah. And one of the things I said to the team, I was like, I guarantee you the reason this person goes back is because they are not built to sit on the sidelines and relax. It's just not possible. Bingo. You can't build the way you have and be as productive as you've been and then one day be unproductive. And a lot of people, their ambition is to one day take a decent, relax, and that's fine and eat to each their own. But I think for someone like yourself who is a builder and a creator and you're not wired to sit like that. Actually, I think that would make you more anxious and more stressed and cause a lot of actual unhappiness in your life to just sit around.

1:17:34No, like I am meant to change things in the world that I do not like or cause people harm or stress or make improvements. Like I like to improve things. And now we get you in Austin. Oh, yeah. before you go you have to tell me how you manage your time what gets your time and attention why did you come on this show what what is worthy of your time i love you oh not you just me you too no i love you too but i okay i just really i vibe with you like i'm very let me tell you what i like about you so much here's the thing i love about you so much are you guys are you having a moment Yeah, we're having a moment.

1:18:15I love that you are multifaceted and unapologetic about it. I find that a lot of women that have found a lot of success or are really like career oriented have a hard time being vulnerable about the other components of their life. Like if they're like a strong businesswoman, like they're a strong businesswoman and that's the only side you're ever going to see. And it's like almost like just this like shell that you'll never see beyond or behind it. And that's just we're made up of a lot of parts. All of us are. We're multifaceted. And so I love that you are unapologetic about being like a nurturing, loving mom, being cozy and like like making a home and making it feel special.

1:18:57But then like being a total boss at work and like having these different sides of you. And I don't I don't personally know so, so, so many people like that. And I don't know. I just I like I like you. I I think you're really cool too and I love your show and I think you have honest open vulnerable conversations and frankly that's where I'm at in my life like I just want to be real and open and I have nothing to hide and I just think more authenticity is better for for the world I will take that coming from the world's youngest female billionaire is that the right is that the right I don't think I am now is that the right there's like all sorts of other ones I mean I'll take it I mean, listen.

1:19:39I better get some good compliments from you tonight. There's so many other younger, cooler women than me. We're going to do the intro when you're not here, and we'll list the accolades. I do want to know, though. I do have to just know, like, this is a selfish question that I would ask you off air. Is the calendar crazy? Are you a psycho? Is it color-coded? It's crazy. I just want to know. Like, I just want to know. Oh, everyone has color. Everyone has the color. Okay. And is it like, how long is the meeting? Like, are you someone who's like, get the fucking meeting in seven minutes? You know what I've started doing?

1:20:07What? Don't tell anyone. it's fine only a few people listening so you want to hack the efficiency hack so i've when i was on mat leave i just had my baby you know a few months ago by the way i did do a natural birth which was crazy yeah you got to tell us about that that was insane i mean i'm like if i ever have another kid i'm getting an epidural right when i get to the hospital i thought you were gonna say you're gonna do a natural birth again oh no one is good okay i'm glad i did it okay all of that to say when i was on mat leave I had you know I was trying really hard to at least for the first several weeks be like very present with my children but I really couldn't just like disappear clearly not I'm the CEO of the company and I'm like in the middle of building a lot of stuff and I care and I want to make it right so I would ask people to record videos for me of what they take me through a meeting, but just record it, send it to me.

1:21:05And then I would listen to it at like 2.5x. So my husband one day walked into the kitchen and there was like, and he was like, what the, what is that? I'm like, oh, I'm just, I'm hearing an update on something that they're working on. And he's like, how do you even hear that? So I've trained myself to listen to things at like the maximum speed. And so then I could get through like 15 updates and these videos were like 15 minutes long 22 minutes long 46 minutes long and I was just plowing through them and I was taking notes and like so I don't know I just make it work I will tell you something it takes a lot to get my husband interested in someone I can tell you after this episode he wants to hang out with you you know she's very interesting he's he loves interesting people he like if you weren't I would have cut the show by about 40 No, sometimes I'll look over at him and his eyes are glazing over his head.

1:21:58Are you bored? No, no. No, no. Where if I lost you? Did I lose you? I'm not bored. Okay. He puts his note cards like this. Go watch it, guys. That's a hack. No, don't worry. I'm going to give my tails away. She's very, very, very interesting. No, no, no. I mean, you said I'm multifaceted. You really, it's an octopus. I like multifaceted. My sign is a pink octopus. We'll talk about that later. Lauren knows this. I like multifaceted, strong women with big personalities. Like there's no, like I'm not shy about it. You're kind of picky with your woman friends. And that's why I'm like, it's interesting to interview you because I know the kind of girl he likes as like, as a friend.

1:22:33And you guys. Yeah. But I like, I like big person. It's funny. I just told you this morning. I was like, God, some of your friends are so surface level. To your point about Lauren, it's like, for me, like, yes, she's beautiful and all of those things. There's an attraction. She's brilliant though. What people, like what's kept me interested since the beginning in so long is it is that like we can laugh. She can do work. She can be serious. She can be nurturing. And then like she can also, you know, be self-deprecating. So like sometimes people see our band and they're like, what's going on here?

1:23:05And I think it's the people that want to always, they want to present in a certain way and they want to show like it's, you know what it is? The people that get uncomfortable with that, this kind of dynamic, it's the ones that are posting pictures of themselves skipping on the beach with a significant other and hugging under the sunset the image red flag yeah no like yeah the the image it's like all about the image

1:23:31life is messy people are messy and sometimes the the people that have it the most together also have a lot of other terrible things going on and i think we like to have that dynamic totally is that hack to do a meeting and speed it up is genius no it's it's honestly do you do it still oh it's such a good efficiency hack i didn't even i never even meant to do it it's just when i was on mat leave i couldn't do zooms all day and like i'm so sick of these zooms what i do in my it's amazing is i make carson talk at 3x speed no you don't he has to get all his thoughts on 15 seconds he has to get it all out yeah yeah yeah exactly the entire company has to speed i will tell you that this interview was worth waiting 10 years for i also think and i don't know how you do this, Michael, that this should be like the beginning.

1:24:18We're rebranding to the Bostics. This to me is like the conversations that I'm excited about having. Yeah, well, you'll come back on. You're right next door now. I'll be back. You're welcome to come back on. The only other thing I want to tell y 'all that I really think is game changing is, I don't know if you've done any of this yet, but I've taught myself how to build stuff on AI. So I'm like, I'm like a vibe coder now. What do you mean you've taught yourself how to build? So like, if I have an idea, and this is cool for you to keep in mind, if I have a concept, I used to have to sit down with my product team pitch it to them hope and pray that they understood what I was saying Then get a designer to like mock it up wireframe it Okay, that would take six weeks and then we'd have to put it through like this that this at that And I could say all the good ideas went to die It was like a dungeon of good idea death and so now I just tell my Little digital technical friend which platform are you using?

1:25:09I like claude. Okay, you like claude. I like claude I like Claude Code. I've been playing on Perplexity Computer a little bit. Have you tried that? I've tried Claude. I've not tried Perplexity yet. Okay, so Claude's my bud. And I basically had Claude, I said, turn into my technical co-founder in life and just pretend you're my technical co-founder. So your job is to bring my visions to life, but make them smarter, better, pressure test them against these investors and these mines and make like build like a bench like a like like go and test it against an advisory board poke holes in it bring it back to me in a better way let me review it and then i want you to design it as if johnny ive and steve jobs got together with the designers of hermes and i like give it the most absurd prompts you've ever heard you're only on chat gpt you gotta like i've been We gotta get you on quad.

1:26:08Well, I like Chachi BT. I love Chachi BT. Chachi BT is a little like, it's a little bit like pat you on the back. Everything you're doing is right. You know? Well, I told it not to do that. Yeah, you have to go. I went into settings. I told it not to do it too, Michael. I was like, be mean to me. I'm all, I'm all, enough about me. What do you think about me? Yeah. What's up anymore? It's all fucked up. It's so brainwashed. Okay, so I'm gonna go, I'm gonna, maybe I'll get into vibe coding. You need to, okay, you need to start vibe coding and we'll show each other our vibe code ideas because if you have like a concept so i've had like a few ideas that i really want to build so i'll build them i'll make mock-ups and then i started a thread at bumble last week which is like bumble build ideas or something i can't remember what we called it and i've asked the whole company to do it so i'm like if you have an idea just vibe code it and maybe we'll build it for real people are very concerned about jobs obviously what do you what's the seeing from a personnel perspective are you thinking ai's especially in i guess uh you know with tech are you thinking this is going to replace a lot of people or is it going to it will replace people that don't know how to operate drive command and control ai if you don't know how to be the boss of ai and direct ai and control ai and build and scale agents and mobilize the agents and run it like an agents if you can't run a team of agents you probably won't be able to run a team at the best companies in a year from now that's interesting so you have to be able to command yeah that's interesting well i did this and you can go practice that but here's the thing anyone can do it you know like i think people are so scared about this but you know at one point we were like technology always changes and always involves and i mean at one point we were literally plowing fields with horses in our hands.

1:27:53And we don't do that anymore. And so, right. Like, I think this idea, like, of course, it will 100 % displace and replace people that do not evolve with the times. But the whole idea is that you evolve. And if you're doing something that AI can do much faster, more efficiently, easier without the cost, like, yeah, you should probably start figuring out like how to evolve. Absolutely. You shouldn't just sit there and be like, I hope it doesn't happen. It's going to happen. And I think it makes you more creative if you know how to lean into it. in person is going to be even more important in a more digital world where this with all this like people are going to crave in my opinion you cannot replace human connection you cannot as much as even that and this is too much information they're like lauren's like what happens if the sex robot comes like i don't know if i want to be sitting with a sex robot all the time are you gonna fuck a sex robot well do you consider it cheating yes are you kidding do you even have to ask that then no.

1:28:45Okay. Oh my God. If I walk in and you're fucking a sex robot, I know. Well, listen, but at one point, these robots. I'm good. But here's what I'm saying. Even if the robot, even if the robot is the most attractive robot ever, what's going to happen is at some point, deep down, you're going to sit there and be like, I am hooking up with a robot. No, humans were made for each other. But you're going to have to look yourself in the mirror. I'm really into grounding. And so I don't feel like a fake penis would do it for me. I like to ground with the frequency. No, but you know, we had Gary Vee's a friend and he was on it.

1:29:16He's like, people will be, he thinks that people will marry AI bots, robots in the future. I think that the most valuable thing five years from now is human to human connection. Agreed. I agree. Which is why I think I'm in the best business. And I think y 'all are in really good business too. I would agree with that. Bumble is partnering with leading happiness expert who has been on the show, author and professor Arthur Brooks. We've been on the show. We love Arthur. That's what I just said. and so how do everyone sign up for Bumble BFF and Bumble and where can they find you to say hi find me to say hi maybe they want to oh I'm starting a group on Bumble BFF today actually that's cute yes you should start one too wait so what do I do okay so I'll show you how but I'm going to start a group where I'm just going to like chat with any women that want to join my group and ask me direct questions or kind of get mentored or anything like that and then I want to learn from them too.

1:30:08I want to know, like, tell me everything going on. So, but Arthur Brooks is incredible. He understands connection better than anybody out there. Women want to be desired, guys. Yeah. And you know what I love about him is he just genuinely wants to help people find happiness. And I believe that the way you find happiness, according to him, is right. Like, you need to have a connection with yourself with a higher power and with each other and if you can do that you're going to have a fulfilling life agreed how can people sign up for bumble everyone that is single i don't care if you're 18 or 80 you should get on bumble we're also rolling out a brand new bumble like overhauled meticulous redesign this summer so stay tuned so many new features are coming i am going to make this the dating app that women have been waiting for i am going to fix women's dating problems.

1:31:04Again. Again and again and again and again. Like, I'm going to keep going and then just download BFF. You can find girlfriends in your area, groups to go do things. There's like groups for everything under the sun from book clubs to makeup to anything you can imagine. You don't need to be lonely. Wherever you are, wherever you're listening from, like BFF is there for finding your people platonically and Bumble is there to find your love. We need a Whitney book club on Bumble BFF. Let's do it. Let's do a woo-woo club. You and I will start one. I'm in.