Attract Love That Will Change Your Future | Vishen Lakhiani EP 379

0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation show.

0:10I firmly believe that taking charge of your mindset allows you to be in the driver's seat of your life and unlock your potential. And that's why I'm thrilled to share that my new book is out right now. It's called The Greatness Mindset. In it, you'll learn how to build a plan for greatness through powerful exercises and toolkits designed to propel your life forward. This is the book that I wish I had 20 years ago. It's everything I've learned in the last decade with the research and the science to help you unlock your mind. Make sure to go to lewishouse.com slash 2023mindset to pick up your copy of my book, The Greatness Mindset, today.

0:54What is the difference between self-love and narcissism? Narcissism is self-love without love for others. We need both. You expand your love and you feel your love radiating to all life, all plant life, all animal life, all human beings. And we go into wider and wider circles. So if you were meditating here, you would see your love radiate to your entire team and even every part of plant in your office. Then you'd expand it to the entire city of LA. You might then go on a detour, maybe see your partner, see your mom and dad, see a nephew and a niece, see your pet. Then you might expand it further to all of the United States.

1:30So you want to see all people of the United States, regardless of color, religion, political view, as being a recipient of your love. Then you expand it to the entire world because you want to feel yourself connected to the greater human species. And studies show that not only does this make you kinder and gentler, you get less triggered. And so there's a huge beneficial effect to you as well. When you walk the world, your mind sees the beauty in other human beings. even if they happen to wrong you, you see the beauty in them. Your judgment disappears and it makes you a better person, but it also makes you a person who uplifts the people around you.

2:09What happens when we judge others? Well, there's a natural thing in our mind called the fundamental attribution error. So when we make a mistake, we attribute it to circumstance, but when somebody else makes a mistake, we attribute it to character. Compassion practices tune down FAE. So let me tell you something that happened to me that I'm not proud of. So I remember I was living in San Francisco and I'm walking down the street and I love this particular street. I walked on beautiful Victorian houses, really nice spot. And there's this lady in front of me and she's eating a freaking Oreo. And as she puts the Oreo in her mouth, she drops the Oreo wrapper.

2:43So I'm like, how dare she does this? What a horrible human being. My fundamental attribution goes up. I'm thinking she's horrible. She's a little bug. So I walk up I grab that Oreo. I make sure I'm walking faster so I overtake her. And I drop it in the bin and turn around and kind of give her a judgy look. And she looks at me. She stops dead in a trap. And then she starts crying. And I'm like, why are you crying? I'm just picking up your trash. And she goes, why do you have to be so mean? And I'm like, I'm not trying to be mean. Why do you have to litter? And she goes, listen, I'm so sorry I littered.

3:21I found out this morning that my boyfriend dumped me. And all I wanted to do was just ease that pain with this Oreo. And my mind was on so many different things. I didn't realize I dropped the wrapper. Why do you have to be such a jerk to me at this moment? She was right. I was a jerk. I labeled her a litter bug without understanding what was really happening in her soul. She wasn't a litter bug. She was a sweet woman who went through a hard time and made a mistake. And I felt that. That's fundamental attribution error. All of us do that. We all do that. Now, when you are seeing the world through the lens of compassion and emanating that compassion, if the wrapper dropped, you might pick it up still.

4:03You might drop it, but you don't feel like you need to prove the other person wrong and you wouldn't judge the other person. You know that in human life, all of us go through moments of weakness, go through moments of pain. And your default thinking might more likely be, Hmm, I wonder if she's okay.

4:47sure to click the link in the description that will take you to the full episode of our main podcast on the School of Greatness. And if you are loving the daily motivation, please follow us over on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want more exclusive content and ad-free listening experience, make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want to get even more inspiration from our world-class guests and learn how to improve your life and take it to the next level, then make sure to sign up for the Greatness newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com slash newsletter.

5:27Again, have an amazing day, and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.

5:42Thank you.