Become Your Most Authentic Self | Sukhinder Singh Cassidy

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0:42Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:I see a lot of people who think about, like, what I do is different from who I am. I have a very hard time separating the two, obviously. Explain that more. Who you are at work and how you express your gift is as important. You know, think about spending 10, 12 hours a day at something. finding a passionate work that expresses who you are. And as I keep coming back to your unique gift and strength for impact, yeah, I think that's very purposeful. And I think a lot of people think like, oh, there's my day job and how I make money. And then there's, you know, what I care about. And I'm like, well, my example, my lifetime, not just my dad, by the way, we give him a lot of credit, but my mom, she was a doctor as well.

1:19Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:She didn't love entrepreneurship the way my dad did, but she loved serving people. I'm like, why can't they be integrated? Why shouldn't they be integrated? Right. So obviously I'm somebody who takes work too personally. Well, I think other people maybe have more distance from it, but I think it's all a reflection of how I grew up. Well, this is my job, and then I come home and I live my authentic life. Yes, exactly. But what if you can live your authentic life all the time? All the time. There's going to be things you don't enjoy doing about your work, your job. Yeah, absolutely. Just like everyone.

1:43But if you could be yourself and use most of your gifts in that role, that's powerful. It would be great, right? That's powerful.

1:48Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:Yeah, and of course. And, you know, we live in an era where most people want to go to work and feel, even more so than ever, that who they are is welcome and that they are included and what their values are fit. And I want the same thing. How do you express your gifts in business? I try and bring three things to any situation. Number one, I wake up most days feeling pretty grateful for the amazingly talented people I get to work with. Yes, your team. I think of both leverage and my gift is making other people able to be even more successful and accelerate their journey. Yes. Right. So I think I have that gift because I don't think I wake up every day thinking I'm the, you know, the best person in the room.

2:24Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:I think I wake up every day going like, wow, these are really talented people. And so what I know I can do for people is give them energy and excitement and passion and help them maybe drive faster than they thought they could go. So I think that's one of my unique gifts. That's great. Number two, I love consuming information. I like thinking fast and acting fast. And so I like to think that, you know, maybe a conversation with me is one where people learn faster and where I learn faster. Like that's a very, so it's not just my gift, right? It's what I enjoy. So I love interactions where you and I, like we have this interaction, we both leave.

2:56Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:And it's like a super rewarding interaction, right? I consume a lot of information. I can give you insight, you can give me insight and off we both go. And so I think I'm pretty good at consuming information. and helping people give insight and gain insight by just asking lots of questions. But it's a gift to be used to help accelerate outcomes. When do you feel the most loved? For me, I feel the most loved when I feel accepted for who I am. Gosh, I was having this conversation this morning with someone literally an hour ago. I was like, I'm so grateful and appreciative to be around people that fully accept me for who I am.

3:31Don't judge me. Don't try to change me. but accept my authentic power.

3:35Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:Yes, that's totally right. And I would say, I feel like I feel completely loved when people accept me for who I am, including my imperfections. Yes. And maybe also I feel loved when people see who I am. Right? So like, we'll leave this conversation and I'll reflect on it. It's like, oh, that person saw a lot more of me. So I think when people see us fully, we feel loved. Gosh, it's so true. What does it seem like in general? There are a lot of us who surround ourselves with people who don't accept us fully. Why does that happen? First of all, remember that on the other side of that equation is somebody else who's also looking for acceptance.

4:07Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:Right, right, right. So it's never like a one way, right? So while we're all going through our own journeys looking forward to be seen and loved, so is the other person. So I think part of the reason, like, it's sort of like ships in the night, right? Everybody is looking to be seen. Maybe what that means is when we stay in relationships, yes, we're hoping to be seen, but the other person is hoping the same thing. And maybe neither of us are engaging in, like, an authentic enough conversation with the other. You know, when we love ourselves, obviously, two things happen. Number one, maybe we have our own renewable source of energy.

4:37Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:That's enough. So while we want to be seen by other people when we love ourselves, right, you're not so starved yourself that all you want to do from that relationship is take. You know, but you can see other people ask them the questions about how they want to be seen. Was there a moment when you fully fell in love with yourself? I don't think I'm fully in love with myself even now. Really? Yeah, I mean, I still have all the same work everybody else does. I still wake up with imposter syndrome. I still wake up. Of course. I still wake up ashamed of the things I haven't achieved or, you know, the impact I still haven't had.

5:08Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:Like, look, the book is an attempted impact, right? So clearly I'm still striving to do something. So I don't consider myself all the way there by any stress. What do you feel an imposter about? I think if you're somebody who wakes up and says, my job is to have impact, right? It's never finished. No, it's never finished. And if you have the humility to understand that you're a speck in this universe, right? Yeah. Most days I just want to wake up and make the most of the time I have. I realize it's finite and that I think I'm here for some purpose. That's what I was trained to believe in my own family spiritually.

5:39Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:Like we're all here for some purpose to give. Then mostly I'm just like constantly worried that I'm not fulfilling that promise. So, yeah. So it's not like a bad kind of like, right? It's not like I wake up and say I don't accept myself. It's more like, wow, if I'm not pushing myself to do more and to have more impact, then I'm not really taking full advantage of why I'm here. By that definition, you're always putting yourself in situations where you may not be enough. But you realize the only way you're going to have the impact you want is if you put yourself at risk. And so you put yourself at risk, you feel like an imposter.

6:09Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:You're like, oh, because you're practicing some act you've never done yet, right? Like, I'm good with it. So to your point, I don't beat myself up. I've mostly accepted that I have a worldview that says it's okay to be imperfect. It's okay that I never feel fully, you know, capable. I'm pretty comfortable with being personally uncomfortable. What are the three most interesting questions you think we should be asking other human beings? First and foremost, I think everybody should ask themselves, what are my unique gifts? When we can articulate what those are, it's not like we're full of ourselves in a bad way.

6:42Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:We understand how maybe we can have the most impact. And we seek out environments where that impact can be kind of known, seen, practiced, and realized. Number two, I believe people should deeply know what they're not great at. I can tell you, like my kids, I drive them crazy. Like all of these same things that are gifts, as you know, have an edge to them that are pretty brutal, right? My kids would be like, mom. What are your unique vulnerabilities? I know I can make people feel energized, but that same energy makes people feel pretty nervous, right? It has a dark side where it's like people could feel like, well, am I not enough?

7:16Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:Like, what do I do to keep up with Sukhinder? Like, that's not really the point, right? I'm not here to make you feel less of yourself. Right. So I speed people up. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Start talking, start talking. People are going faster, faster. So I'm pretty impatient. Yeah. So like if you have high energy and it's always trying to be deployed, you're pretty impatient, right? You may not wait for somebody to finish their sentence. You make somebody else feel nervous. So like that will always be my work, right? And that is the downside of being like a highly energized person, like controlling that energy and that passion right so it's always at its most productive edge that is it by a mile and then the third question we should and the third question i i would say that people should ask themselves i think it's maybe not a question you ask once it's a question you ask many many times which is what's possible now in any of your neck if you stop and said like what's possible now that i'm not doing people think the possibilities in big acts right and i think possibilities in small acts.

8:09Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:So if I see it, it's like, what's possible today? Maybe that's the question. What's possible today? If I wanted to find more joy in a certain area, if I want to find more joy at work, what's possible today? But I do think that there's a lot of power in small acts and starting now, right? And to your point, getting in that imperfect motion versus waiting for the day where every, every possibility will be perfect. That day never comes. It never comes. So I think like, if you ask yourself what's possible today, you probably unlock something today, right? And I'm not saying any of us are going to be able to unlock it.

8:37Sukhinder Singh Cassidy:I live no perfect day where I unlock all the possibilities in my life. I do know the power that comes from unlocking even one possibility. I have a brand new book called Make Money Easy. And if you're looking to create more financial freedom in your life, you want abundance in your life, and you want to stop making money hard in your life, but you want to make it easier, you want to make it flow, you want to feel abundant, then make sure to go to makemoneyeasybook.com right now and get yourself a copy. I really think this is going to help you transform your relationship with money this moment moving forward.

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