Dr. Mary Claire Haver: The Critical Truth About Women's Health After 30 & The Menopause Revolution | EP 857

0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes, and welcome to The Daily Motivation Show.

0:11What is the biggest risk women have in their 20s and 30s about trying to stay thin and skinny versus strong and healthy? So it's hard for them to see it because they're 20, right? And they feel good and they look great. They feel like they look great because the clothes are, you know. But what they're not seeing is we peak our muscle mass and our bone density at about age 30. And that musculoskeletal unit is tied together. And so you have to, wherever that line is for you, we start losing muscle and bone mass after age 30. And menopause accelerates that when we lose estrogen and testosterone. We start losing it really fast.

0:53How much harder is it for you to gain muscle now? Oh my God, it is so hard. I mean, it's literally every day I'm like looking at my plate and I'm like, protein, plants, fiber. Or, you know, I'm not even caring about calories and I'm totally changed the way I move my body. Really? Weightlifting. I mean, I used to like work out like, you know, in Zumba last year, a couple of years ago with the eight pound weights. I never got any heavier. I wasn't trying to be stronger. I just, you know. And now I'm like trying to bench press my weight, you know, and do all these things because I sit there in the gym and it's all about me staying out of the nursing home when I get older.

1:27and that muscle mass determines your basal metabolic rate yeah determines your determines your resilience to insulin resistance like it's everything yeah dr gabrielle line has been a big proponent of promoting muscle she's where i learned all this stuff yeah and just really like she changed my life the number one factor of aging i think is like a lack of muscle or just like or of death i can't remember what it is but like one of the main greatest predictors yeah is like a lack of muscle. And mostly because you fall and you can't get up or you can't function after you break something and the muscle will prevent that from happening and keep you stronger and healthier.

2:02So what I tell my patients is osteoporosis is real and 50 % of women will have an osteoporotic fracture before they die, okay? If you fall and break your hip, your chance of death in one year is 30 % with surgery. Why is that? If it's declined, you can't get out of bed, it's like the beginning of the end. And then if you're not healthy enough to have the surgery, 79 % will die in one year. Wow. Because you're bedridden. And that year is horrible, marked with decline. Now, some people, it's not everyone, some people can recover from a hip fracture. But man, if you're over 60, 65, and you have a hip fracture, it is really a bell ringer for a very bad outcome for you.

2:43But this is preventable. And it can start in your 30s. That's what I'm telling the younger patients. Get to the gym, start lifting weights, Focus on your vitamin D. Make sure you're getting good dietary calcium. Do everything you can to get strong muscle and bones. Eat enough protein. Thank you, Dr. Lyon. And focus on that is going to keep you healthy and strong and also probably help you lose the fat. But you know what? Curves are beautiful and we all have different shapes and sizes. And subcutaneous fat does not necessarily mean that you're not healthy. It's the visceral fat. Right, exactly.

3:15Okay, so movement and then one more. What would be it? So stress reduction. and why menopausal patients are finding that easier now really because they are realizing that no one's coming to save them and it's time to start prioritizing themselves and that can look different for different people but but in menopause women are really like okay this is it if i don't do this like they are really putting up boundaries it's fun to watch really they're like it's my time i'm done wow feed yourself make your own food take care of that i gotta take care me. So it's really, really awesome for me to see them really lean into this.

3:53And like, you can make your own dinner, you know, like I'm meditating, leave me alone. So, but what that stress reduction looks like can be boundaries, can be meditation, can be journaling, can be a phone call, can be hanging out with a girlfriend, can be, you know, whatever, but like find that. Okay. Those are great. I think you gave me five different tools that women could do during this menopause phase to make it more enjoyable, make it less stressful. Yeah. I have a question about menopause and divorce. Yeah. It seems like divorce happens a lot around that season of life. Absolutely. And maybe it's not all because of menopause, but it's because of whatever, unsaid things for 20 years, people have been married, our kids are gone, or whatever it might be.

4:38Well, I have a couple of patients who are divorce attorneys and they have lots of opinions and I'm popping the popcorn and listening to them. So they said, you know, so there's women who were never in a great relationship but stuck it out because kids and finances and whatever. And now you're like, and now they're like, I'm out. Okay, so take those out. People who felt like they had a good partner and now what happened? And so most of those divorce, the first set is mostly initiated by women. Men, the happiest men in the world are men who are married and the most unhappy women in the world are women who are married.

5:09Wait, say that again? The happiest men in the world are married men, and the unhappiest women in the world are married women. Why is that? You know, well, I think it's the jobs we give ourselves and the jobs society expects on us. The unmet expectations. And all the mental load and the work. And there's lots of TikToks about that right now, and I find it all fascinating. And that was kind of what happened early in my own marriage, and we worked it out, and it's fine. There's definitely, we have division of labor things, but it's a lot more equitable now. but I think the second set so women we have increasing depression that's a risk factor for divorce we have increasing cognitive changes she's not happy in her you know job job changes and there's a lot of sexual dysfunction which can destroy a relationship

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6:52Again, have an amazing day and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.