How to be the Star of Your Own Life | Dr. Phil EP 282

0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation show.

0:10I firmly believe that taking charge of your mindset allows you to be in the driver's seat of your life and unlock your potential. And that's why I'm thrilled to share that my new book is out right now. It's called The Greatness Mindset. In it, you'll learn how to build a plan for greatness through powerful exercises and toolkits designed to propel your life forward. This is the book that I wish I had 20 years ago. It's everything I've learned in the last decade with the research and the science to help you unlock your mind. Make sure to go to lewishouse.com slash 2023mindset to pick up your copy of my book, The Greatness Mindset, today.

0:51If someone's not a big-time player in their life right now or in their career or relationship or business, how can they become a big-time player? I think everybody can. I think that's the whole point. Look, if you don't star in your own life, who's going to? Absolutely. I think you've got to decide that you're going to be who you are on purpose. Don't wake up every day and let the world tell you who you are, who you're going to be. And I think a lot of people do that. What do you mean by be you on purpose? Well, the world is going to tell you who to be and where you fit in. Your parents have an expectation set for you.

1:31Your job has an expectation. your community, your church, everybody has a slot for what they expect you to do. And that may or may not be who you really are. And I think you have to make a decision about who you really are, what your values are, what you believe, what matters to you, what doesn't matter to you. And you've got to decide, I'm going to embrace those values and pursue those goals. and I'm going to do it on purpose and I'm not going to apologize for it. And so when you say, what are you doing and why are you doing it? I'll say I'm doing A, B, and C and I'm doing it on purpose. Like me, don't like me, but that's who I am and I'm doing it on purpose.

2:17This is not a mistake. I believe in a defined brand. A defined brand. A defined brand. Do you think anybody's going to confuse me with somebody else? No. No. No, seriously, you're not going to confuse me with somebody else. There are a lot of people out there that have fine brands. They're good people and what they do is good and they have a lot to contribute. And I think that's what I mean when I say you've got to be who you are on purpose. I'm very straightforward. Yeah. I'm going to tell you the truth as I see it. Now, you may disagree and if you do and what I say won't withstand challenge, throw it out.

2:56100 % I am not the repository of all knowledge. And if what I tell you won't withstand challenge, hit the eject button and move on. But I'm going to be who I am on purpose. I'm going to sink or swim, not based on what somebody else decides I should say or do. I'm going to do it based on what I believe at the core of my soul I need to do. What happens if we don't get clear on our values and we aren't, we're being someone else on purpose, but not ourselves. What happens to us? It's not authentic. It's not ever going to work. Look, to me, it's congruency. If you're not congruent with what you really believe at the core of your soul, then you're incongruent.

3:40And it's not going to work. And if you are congruent, then it's going to feel right to you. And then I think you have to star in your own life. I don't care if you're a teacher or a plumber or a butcher or a baker or a candlestick maker. You have to decide, I'm going to take pride in who I am and I'm going to be good at what I do. I'm going to be proud of what I do and I'm going to be the star of my own life. And maybe that's in the way you give to other people, the way you parent your children, the way you spouse with your partner or whatever. But I think we generate the results in life that we think we deserve.

4:24I can watch somebody and tell you what they think they deserve because it's who they surround themselves with. Right. It's the activities they choose. And the problem is you model that for your children. Somebody comes home and says, how was your day at work? Oh, it's horrible. It's another day. You're modeling for your child to sell out, take a job you make, but do it every day of your life. That's terrible. That's not being who you are on purpose. That's being who somebody else wants you to be and modeling for your child that you grow up and sell out to what somebody else wants you to do, whether you like it or not.

5:00I hate when people do that. And I try to get people not to do that. They say, well, it's easy for you. You've got enough money to do what you want to do. It's not about the money. It's about finding a way to be who you are in your own paradigm. It's how you do what you do, not necessarily what you do.

5:26Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of The Daily Motivation. and I hope you have an amazing rest of your day. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to click the link in the description. That will take you to the full episode of our main podcast on the School of Greatness. And if you are loving the daily motivation, please follow us over on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want more exclusive content and ad-free listening experience, make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel on Apple Podcasts. right now. And if you want to get even more inspiration from our world-class guests and learn how to improve your life and take it to the next level, then make sure to sign up for the greatness newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com slash newsletter.

6:22Again, have an amazing day and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the daily motivation show.

6:37Thank you.