How To Find Meaning After Unimaginable Pain | Edith Eger

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0:28Learn more at directtv.com. Restrictions apply. Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

0:42Seven grandsons, I think are the two twins, the two-year-olds, are those the youngest grandsons you have? Yes, the youngest. So there's 93 years-ish between you and your youngest grandsons. I'm curious what is the you know they at this moment they don't know the type of life you've had right not until they're a little older will they understand the stories and hear the stories about your whole experience from what you know their great grandmother went through and how you overcame so many challenges and obstacles and how you became a member of society for hope and inspiration I'm curious if you could share three lessons with them to set them up for their life?

1:30Edith Eger:What would those three lessons be? I probably would tell them that I will never forget what happened. I don't know what it means to overcome.

1:49Edith Eger:I don't think I I don't know exactly what that means but I came to terms with it I call it my cherished wound cherished wound yes I cherish the wound

2:08Edith Eger:that I learned in the classroom of Auschwitz how does someone learn to cherish their wounds with something that's so tragic you don't appreciate what you have until you lose it see if you take me out to dinner and you might do that take me out to lunch

2:32I think

2:35Edith Eger:I'm going to eat up my food and then I'm going to pick up your leftovers and if I don't do that, I'll take it home. I never waste any food. I never leave food on my plate or in your plate. I do something with it and I give it away. You know. Why do you do that? One time I had a party and I had a lot of leftovers And I went out and I saw someone at the corner waiting. And I gave them the food. Why is that something you do? I thought, you know, they must be hungry. Yeah. But they didn't want food. They wanted money. So they threw it back at me. I don't want your goddamn food. Give me money. Right.

3:33Edith Eger:Yeah. What's another thing you would share with your grandkids, your great-grandkids? Right now, they're too young to listen to anything. But my great-grandson are 15, 12, and 10. And they're very interested in grammar. And I'm a very interesting person to be with. I have a lot to say. Not what happens. It's what you do with it. Right. I think the coming to terms with the cherished wound, it's like creating meaning around what happened, right? Exactly. The existential vacuum. Viktor Frankl used to refer to that. And it's very important to know that it's not clinical depression. Why do people get that confused?

4:33Edith Eger:Yeah. Well, I had two paraplegics, both coming from Vietnam, same symptomatology, same diagnosis. Okay. And one of them was in a kind of a fetal position. Why me? How could anyone do this to me? Blaming God, blaming, you name it, the country, of course. Conversely, the other one said to me, same symptomatology, same diagnosis. same prognosis. He said to me, Hey, doc. I was wearing a white coat, and it said, Dr. Eger, Department of Psychiatry. Uh-huh. Okay. He says, Hey, doc. I'm so grateful that I sit in a wheelchair because I can reach my children much closer. Oh, my goodness. Can you believe it?

5:32Edith Eger:Wow. And I can... And reached the flowers much closer. And I felt like the biggest imposter. Because I had a 16-year-old in me that I ran away from. I really wasn't qualified to take them further. Because I have not taken myself. Wow. You know, I went to school and I went to school. And, you know, I became Dr. Edith Iwaiga. but I never really did the work. Really? The healing work? So I went back to Auschwitz. When did you go back? I asked my sister to come with me probably in the 70s or 80s and she told me I'm an idiot and that was the end of that. My sister coming with me and I went alone And today the work I do to revisit the places where you've been, to relive that experience, but then you revise your life.

6:40Relive the experience and then revise your life. Exactly. Rewrite the story.

6:45Edith Eger:It's not going back. It's a new beginning.

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