The FBI Guide to Mastering Negotiations | Chris Voss EP 414

0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

0:10There was a negotiation guru from the 80s, but he gave the example, and you get a custom-made suit. And you've made the deal for the suit, and one of the guys measuring you, you say, so how many free ties do I get with that? And he said, that's a great way to get free things, free little things, after they made the deal. And what that does is make the person you did it to hate you, which they're going to resent it. And if they have the opportunity to fail, to comply with any term, they will do that. Now, unfortunately, it's taught really extensively and it's done in business all the time. People call it scope creep, feature creep.

0:47Interesting. Like it drives every single business person crazy because they don't know how to deal with it. You know, you might say, if you were good at how questions, you might say, how can I give you the free ties and continue to want to do business with you? how can I be a great tailor for you if you ask me for free stuff and it cuts my margin? Make what they ask for the obstacle to what they want. Either what you want is a path or if what they want is bad, it's the obstacle. How can I serve the needs of your family if you're cutting into my profit margin? Because a lot of people have been taught that.

1:23They don't know any better. Like if I'd have stuck to that training that I learned from this guy back in the 1980s, I'd have thought it was okay because I'm getting free ties all over the place. Yeah. Like a lot of people, if they don't know any better, how do you wake them up so that if they only knew, they'd change? Now, there's some people that are doing it on purpose. If you do something like that to me because you didn't know any better, let me see if I can wake you up. If I can wake you up, awesome. We've got a great long-term relationship. If I can't wake you up, I now know. And I'm probably like, okay, cool.

1:57This is the last deal I make with this guy. One and done, yeah. This is a one and done. I'm out. I got job negotiation. Recently brought somebody onto my company. Thought we had the deal settled. Because employment contracts like any other. And this person brings up a bunch of other stuff. After we've laid out the terms, we've written the offer letter, we sent the offer letter. Offer letter doesn't get signed. Silence. Not a good sign. My director of operations, who knows no oriented questions, she's this person in an email. have you given up on signing the offer letter? Immediately comes back with a bunch of you know not ridiculous benefits.

2:39More asks. More asks. Yeah. Which are not on a plate. Some of them are like wow that was interesting I never thought of that one. Now we can't do that not in a million years. This is stuff I aspire to. But not you now. We can't do it now. But no this is I like this one. It's just not in the package now. But my director of operations, like, I never had somebody come back. And I'm like, okay, first I got to do is I got to find out did this person just not know any better? So I engaged in the conversation and I said, all right, so however this goes, I want you to understand two things. First of all, I'm glad it came up now as opposed to six months from now.

3:17But secondly, this is a bad habit to bring stuff up after the deal has been cut. So I'm guessing you just didn't know any better and you were uncomfortable bringing it up. Right. But if you come on board first, you got to understand we don't do this to people. And you got to learn we work all the little stuff out before we think we have an agreement instead of going for little stuff after the agreement. And this person was like, hey, you know, I didn't know. My intention is to help build the company and I appreciate you let me know. And I understand where you're coming from. They were genuine about it.

3:52They were very genuine. I needed to know that. like was this person advised to do this did they do it by accident or did they do that because this is going to be the predictor of future behavior which now we have a real problem because if this is a habit that you're born with you are not going to last and you can't represent me because the people that work on my team are also my ambassadors I got to find out what else one it is and I go back and we talk it through and we settle everything out and I got a list of things to aspire to for employee benefits because these are great things. Sure. To finish that up, one of the worst things you can do is ask for more and more and more and more things after the negotiation has been agreed on.

4:40Right. Do that before the final agreement is what I'm hearing you say. Yep.

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