The Invisible Thief of Your Happiness | Mel Robbins EP 912

0:00There are two big things happening at one time that I've never done before. I'm going on a book tour for my new book, Make Money Easy, and I'm doing a podcast tour at the same time. It is going to be big, and I'm going to seven cities in 10 days. Get your friends, get your family, bring everyone you know to these cities. I'm coming to Austin, Texas, New York, Boston. We're going to Nashville. Then we're going to Los Angeles, San Diego, and San Francisco. Make sure to get your tickets right now. go to lewishouse.com slash tour again bring everyone you know if you're looking to create more financial freedom and abundance in your life and you want to see a massive guest live on the school of greatness show get your tickets i can't wait to see you there hi my name is lewis house and welcome to the daily motivation show

0:59What is the number one thing you hear from everyone in the world that only you have a unique perspective on? What's interesting is that we all think we know what is holding us back. And we describe it, whether it's money or time, or I'm exhausted or I'm stuck, or it's my past, or it's my mindset. And it's not that at all. If you're not happy, if you don't have what you want in life, if you're exhausted, tired, stuck, or overwhelmed. The problem isn't what you think it is. In fact, the problem isn't you. The problem is the power you are unknowingly giving to other people. There are eight key ways that you have turned other people into the biggest obstacle in your life.

1:42And other people should be one of the greatest sources of inspiration and connection and joy and love. and instead they're a constant source of stress and frustration and energy drain and they do not have to be and it is this invisible obstacle that is in everybody's way that is stealing your time is stealing your energy and you don't even realize it and there's a totally different way to go through life your single most valuable resources are time and energy because where you spend your time and what you pour your energy into determines the quality of your life. And what I started to notice very, very, very quickly, like within 24 hours, is that the reason why I didn't have a lot of time is because I was spending it getting worked up about stupid things.

2:27The reason why my energy was so drained is because I was allowing other people's behavior or things that were happening around me to actually drain my energy. And saying let them became this lever I could pull any moment where I felt my time and attention getting sucked towards something that truly wasn't worth my time and energy or didn't matter or more importantly beyond my control. And as you talk about all the time and as lots of people talk about, it's not about what's happening, it's about how you respond to it. And the problem that I've always had with stoicism or letting it go or principles that are about being more peaceful and boundaries is that I never knew how to apply it.

3:12Like, let's take the concept of let it go. I don't want to let it go. Because it feels like I'm losing. You know, when somebody says to you, Lewis, you just got to let it go. They're basically saying you lose. So stop worrying about it. That person won. You got to let it go. And what if there's an example of like, okay, someone in your company steals a hundred grand from you or does or take something from you or does something that you're like do I just let it go well it's a great question just let them take whatever they want do I just let them that's a fabulous crap all over me because that actually happened to me so I had two things happen in my company one where we had a contractor that literally stole our database and lied about a campaign that we thought we were paying for that was going on and it never actually happened and they presented fake data.

4:03Now I have to let them because it happened and I didn't know until I discovered it too late. But there's a second part to this theory because of course I'm going to get upset and I'm going to be pissed off, but allowing myself to stay in that state of rage, what I know is it doesn't allow me to leverage this part of my brain to then respond. And that's the second part of this theory that I discovered, which is once you say, let them, you detach from the thing you can't control. Because the other thing that happened to me, Lewis, and I think I've shared the story with you before is that I was also the victim of a big wire fraud fraud scam,$350 ,000, a scam that's very common in the real estate business where somebody breaks into a server and just intercepts emails and then changes banking information.

4:59$250 is a lot. No kidding. But by the time I figured it out, the money was gone. Gone. Gone. And the more upset that you get about something, the less you use, the more upset that you get about something, the faster you lose your ability to think critically. It's true. And so when you say let them, it's like allowing something without allowing it. It's recognizing that there is something that happened there is a person in your life that's doing something that's pissing you off or annoying you or stressing you out or worrying you, but you have no control over that. And so yes, react, but at some point you got to go let them because it helps you recognize and accept the reality and detach from something.

5:41Yeah, it's already happened and detach most importantly from what you can't control.

5:52Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of The Daily Motivation, and I hope you have an amazing rest of your day. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to click the link in the description. That will take you to the full episode of our main podcast on The School of Greatness. And if you are loving The Daily Motivation, please follow us over on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want more exclusive content and ad-free listening experience, make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want to get even more inspiration from our world-class guests and learn how to improve your life and take it to the next level, then make sure to sign up for the Greatness newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com slash newsletter.

6:42Again, have an amazing day and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.