The Missing Bridge Between Your Dreams And Reality | Mel Robbins

0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

0:11Well, I think the law of attraction and manifesting are the same thing. So law of attraction, for everybody who has not read The Secret, is simply your thoughts become things. And it's true. We've talked all about how when you have a negative self-talk, it tends to draw more of that to you. I think about it like lint in a dryer. Once negative stuff starts collecting, it collects a lot more. We can also talk about your brain filter or something called the reticular activity system and how it is a live network that filters the brain. We'll dig into that deeper, but let's do surface level right now, manifesting law of attraction.

0:44So here's what everybody gets wrong about manifesting. Everybody, at least kind of in the mass market, what you're trained to think about when you think about manifesting is vision boards. And when you hear the word vision boards, you think about the big stuff. Should you have big dreams? Of course you should. Should you dream of building a mansion on the ocean if that's your thing? Yes. Should you dream of the log cabin? Yes. If you want a Lamborghini or the new Ford Bronco, should you? Yeah. Yes, yes, yes. If you want the family, if you want the body, should you think about it? Yeah, absolutely.

1:19Here's where everybody goes wrong. You dream about the end. You make this gorgeous collage of all this stuff that has nothing to do with your current life. That literally, as you're sitting in your studio apartment with the cat box that hasn't been changed in two weeks. No food in the fridge. No food in the fridge. And you're looking for a job and you're staring at a mansion going, someday. It's going to make you feel like a loser. Because the gap between where you are and where you want to go, it seems insurmountable. And so what happens, based on the research, is when you only visualize the endgame, Lewis, it's demotivating.

2:00at first it's really fun to like have a bottle of wine and make your like collage i'm gonna visualize i'm gonna slap this up there's my vision board it's fabulous law of attraction baby come on i'm gonna think about it it's gonna come to me okay i've been doing this for two days i'm not i'm still in this apartment with the cat box it needs to be changed the way to visualize properly is to visualize the bridge between where you are and where you need to go. The bridge. Yes, and particularly the horrible stuff. So let's use your example of the marathon. The vision board would be Lewis Crossing. The arms up the medal.

2:40The arms up the medal, exactly. High fives, yeah, I did it. Yes, I did it, exactly. That will not help you because when you hit mile 13 on the actual race and it is sleeting rain. You're just like, why am I doing this? Yes. It feels nothing like that thing on your vision board. You're going to start a negative dialogue. I can't do this. My knees hurt. This is not what I thought it was going to be. I'm not ready for this. I didn't train for this. I'm running New York. I trained in LA. Are you running in New York? LA. Okay, good. Well, then at least you're trained in the right weather. So on and on and on.

3:12And you are going to tank yourself. What you do by visualizing the bridge is you train your nervous system and your mind to do the hard work. So you should visualize not crossing the finish line, but what is it like to be at mile 12 when your batteries run out on your earbuds? Yeah. No, I'm serious. And you keep going. What's it like when your shoelace breaks and now your heel is lifting and you're starting to get a blood blister at mile 17? What's it feel like when you wake up and it is pouring rain and you visualize yourself running anyway? That way, When you visualize the work, you are preparing your body for it.

3:56So you're not resistant to it when it comes. Yeah. Isn't that cool? I think it's great. It's a story that I had. George St. Pierre, who's one of the greatest UFC fighters of all time. He said that he always puts himself in the most uncomfortable situations in practice leading up to the fight. the most, you know, the hardest situations to get himself out of. When his arms are behind his back and he's facing against the mat in between the fence and he's just getting punched in the face. He's like, how do I get out of this? Right, right. He's like, visualize that and seeing how can I get through this?

4:33Yeah, yeah, exactly. When it seems like I just want to tap out. Yes. Instead of tapping out, what's the process for figuring out how to get through it? Yeah. To then raise my hand at the end victorious. Totally. And so you are literally building up almost like this resilience and this muscle inside of you to do the work to get the thing. So, yeah, create the vision board, but make sure in addition to crossing the finish line, you have somebody running in the rain. You have somebody who you have an alarm clock that says 513. You have, you know, these images that show the stuff that you don't want to do.

5:08So like for people who want to launch a business, for example, like a lot of people that I'm sure follow both of us are dying to launch a business or interested in being an influencer, social media or making money online. And what you visualize are the checks or you visualize the money you're going to make or you visualize how cool it's going to be when you're a lifestyle entrepreneur, whatever the hell it is. Don't do that. Visualize working a day job and telling your friends that you're not going to go out tonight because you're working on something. Visualize making cold calls and being told no.

5:38visualize not going to that party because you're staying in on a Saturday and not going to the barbecue because you're putting in the work. Visualize sitting at a seminar and learning from other people. Visualize watching YouTube videos. Visualize your first ever course failing miserable. Like literally that's the sort of thing that you want to visualize yourself doing and pushing through because that's going to help you do the work. Yeah. Isn't that cool? I think that's great. Yeah, visualizing. So in order to manifest what you want, don't just visualize the good things happening. Visualize the bridge, all the things it's going to take to get it.

6:13Yes, and the hard parts of the bridge because then you're ready for it. Then you're like, I didn't expect this to be this hard. I mean, it's still going to be hard, but you're less likely to quit.

6:28I have a brand new book called Make Money Easy. and if you're looking to create more financial freedom in your life, you want abundance in your life and you want to stop making money hard in your life, but you wanna make it easier, you wanna make it flow, you wanna feel abundant, then make sure to go to makemoneyeasybook.com right now and get yourself a copy. I really think this is gonna help you transform your relationship with money this moment moving forward. We have some big guests and content coming up. Make sure you're following. And thank you for listening to this episode of The Daily Motivation Show.

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8:02Again, have an amazing day and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.