The SCIENCE Behind Building SELF-CONFIDENCE! | Scott Barry Kaufman

0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

0:11If you can share what is Maslow's hierarchy of needs, for people that don't understand it fully, what does that process and framework look like? And then what is your Kauffman sail belt in order for us to learn what that is too? So a lot of people might not have heard of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, but surely they've seen the meme on the internet. It's a pyramid with various levels of needs that one needs to fulfill in order to be able to focus your attention on self-actualization, which is becoming all that you're uniquely capable of becoming. So the needs for connection, the needs for self-esteem, the need for safety, all these things that clearly if your mind's preoccupied, you're hungry, you're not focused on self-actualization.

0:55So it's contextual as well throughout the course of our day. You know, if you feel very lonely, your mind is preoccupied with the deprivation of your loneliness. You know, if you don't feel like you're getting any respect, you know, your whole consciousness is directed towards respect to me. And you're kind of in part onto the world. You know, you want the world to kind of bend to your will in a way. Where is respect on that chain of needs? In Maslow's original, it was the highest up before self-actualization. So we want, we need to, we can't eat. The only thing we're thinking about is food. Yes.

1:27If we're sick, the only thing we're thinking about is getting healthy. If we have nowhere to sleep, the only thing we're thinking about is shelter. Yeah. And then once we have that foundation, it's the next level. Loneliness, then loneliness, social connection, and then esteem. Then esteem, which is respect. Respecting yourself and then getting respect from others. Yes, he had both of those forms of esteem he talked about. Okay, and the next one is? Belonging and connection, the need to belong, the need to make connections with others, and then esteem was higher. In his original model. Then you self-actualize.

2:00What does self-actualization mean? He didn't like the term self-actualization. I found in an unpublished essay, I found in a footnote, he said, I hate that damn word self-actualization. Really? Oh my God. He never said the words. Towards the end of his life, he started to think of it more. He preferred the term fully human. Ooh, I like that. Yeah, yeah. And that's how he started talking about it later in his life. What does fully human mean in your mind? Sure. I'll tell you, in his early years, what he meant by self-actualization first, he thought of self-actualization as becoming your unique creative potential.

2:34You know, like what is the thing within you? What's the song within you, right, sort of thing? That's definitely how he viewed it in his early life. But becoming fully human, as he started to think about this concept more broadly, was how can you kind of bring your whole self to the table? You can become self-actualized and not be very transcendent, not give back to others, not get outside yourself. Towards the end of his life, he started to distinguish between self-actualizing non-transcenders and self-actualizing transcenders. Two different classes of self-actualizers. The self-actualizing non-transcenders, the person who goes to work, they clock in, they do their job.

3:16maybe their job isn't something that necessarily contributes much to society, but you know they're good and they go home. It's not fulfilling to them personally. It might be it might even be a little bit fulfilling, but it's not something that's really getting outside of themselves, you know, and doesn't be in line with what Mazzo called the B values. The B values. The B values, the values of being itself. So these are values that you don't need to do them for any other reason. Truth, justice, beauty, meaningfulness. He has a long list of the B values. We call it the B values. Perfection. Excellence.

3:48Excellence is one of his B values. You strive for excellence for excellence's sake. You strive for beauty for beauty to take. You strive for truth for truth to take. Not to get likes, not to get followers, not for accomplishments, but just to be in that state. To be. You want more meaning in your life, not so that you get famous. You want meaning. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So self-actualization and then self-aggression plus transcendence. Transcendence. And what's transcendence mean? I have a complicated definition because I just want to distinguish between healthy transcendence and unhealthy transcendence.

4:22Okay, what are those? So you see a lot of these gurus who preach transcendence and then they kind of molest everyone, you know, in their parish. It's built on a very faulty foundation, as Maslow put it. You know, he called it pseudo-growth, growth built on a faulty foundation, and I call it pseudo-transcendence. Yeah, it's transcendence built on really you're trying to get your esteem needs, self-esteem needs met. What is healthy transcendence? Healthy transcendence is an emergent phenomenon resulting from the harmonious integration of one's whole self in the service of cultivating the good society.

4:55For me, that's kind of like my definition of greatness. I always tell people that. Isn't that interesting? The way that I view greatness is it's discovering your unique talents and gifts and pursuing your dreams using those gifts and making an impact on the most people you can in the pursuit of those dreams. Yeah, I love that. And the key thing I try to point out there is also that it's important to have integration there of all the various sides of yourself.

5:34I have a brand new book called Make Money Easy. And if you're looking to create more financial freedom in your life, you want abundance in your life, and you want to stop making money hard in your life, but you want to make it easier, you want to make it flow, you want to feel abundant, then make sure to go to makemoneyeasybook.com right now and get yourself a copy. I really think this is going to help you transform your relationship with money this moment moving forward. We have some big guests and content coming up. Make sure you're following. And thank you for listening to this episode of The Daily Motivation Show.

6:18Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of The Daily Motivation. And I hope you have an amazing rest of your day. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to click the link in the description. That will take you to the full episode of our main podcast on the School of Greatness. And if you are loving the daily motivation, please follow us over on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want more exclusive content and ad-free listening experience, make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel on Apple Podcasts right now. And if you want to get even more inspiration from our world-class guests and learn how to improve your life and take it to the next level, then make sure to sign up for the Greatness newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com slash newsletter.

7:08Again, have an amazing day, and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.

7:25Thank you.