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Podcast Summary: The Daily Motivation - Episode with Kerry Washington
Episode Overview
- Podcast Title: The Daily Motivation
- Episode Title: The Secret To A Strong Marriage No One Talks About | Kerry Washington
- Host: Lewis Howes
- Guest: Kerry Washington
This episode dives into the complexities of maintaining a strong marriage, with insights from Kerry Washington, who reflects on her own experiences and learnings about love, commitment, and the necessity of nurturing relationships.
Key Themes and Insights
Marriage as a Journey
- Commitment Through Challenges:
- Kerry emphasizes that marriage isn’t about achieving perfection but about navigating the ups and downs together.
- She recalls a pivotal lesson from her mother: her 16 years of life experience are just a fraction of her parents' long marriage, highlighting the importance of patience and perspective.
Spiritual Partnership
- Creating a Deeper Connection:
- Kerry discusses how she views her marriage as a "third entity," something sacred that both partners invest in, rather than a mere transaction of give-and-take.
- This approach fosters a shared emotional bank account that sustains them through life’s challenges, including demanding careers and parenting.
Importance of Therapy
- Proactive Relationship Maintenance:
- Kerry advocates for therapy as a tool for couples, not just when issues arise but as a way to actively celebrate and acknowledge each other’s contributions and successes.
- She shares that they often focus on the positive aspects of their relationship in therapy, reinforcing what works well.
Ego vs. Love
- Separating Personal Success from Relationship Dynamics:
- The conversation touches on the importance of separating individual egos from the relationship, especially when both partners are pursuing high-stakes careers.
- Kerry stresses that the core of their commitment is love and the spiritual connection between them.
Key Takeaways
- Marriage Requires Effort:
- Like physical fitness, couples should regularly "work out" their relationship to strengthen it.
- Celebrate Each Other:
- Regularly acknowledging and celebrating each other’s successes is vital for a healthy partnership.
- Invest in the Relationship:
- Viewing the marriage as a shared entity helps both partners focus on nurturing it rather than keeping score of sacrifices.
- Therapy is Preventative:
- Engaging in therapy is a proactive measure that can enhance relationship health, not just a reaction to problems.
Conclusion Kerry Washington’s insights provide a refreshing perspective on marriage, underscoring the importance of commitment, celebration, and proactive maintenance. The episode encourages listeners to invest in their relationships genuinely and to view marriage as a partnership that requires ongoing work and care.
For more details, visit the full episode
[The Daily Motivation - Kerry Washington](https://greatness.lnk.to/1768).
Additional Resources
- Host's Book: [Make Money Easy](http://makemoneyeasybook.com)
- Newsletter Sign-Up: [Greatness Newsletter](http://www.greatness.com/newsletter)
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.
0:08I have a brand new book called Make Money Easy. And if you're looking to create more financial freedom in your life, you want abundance in your life, and you want to stop making money hard in your life, but you want to make it easier, you want to make it flow, you want to feel abundant, then make sure to go to makemoneyeasybook.com right now and get yourself a copy. I really think this is going to help you transform your relationship with money this moment moving forward. We have some big guests and content coming up. Make sure you're following and stay tuned to this episode of The Daily Motivation Show.
0:49When you met your man, how did you know that you guys were building a spiritual partnership and connecting from a spiritual space? even though you had this kind of, you know, you had a great relationship with your parents, but there was something missing still with your father. How did you learn to trust your intuition in relationship when you had a broken partial relationship, fractured, you know, relationship with your dad? How did you trust your intuition with the man you have now? So there are a couple of things. I mean, one is my parents, the fact that my parents are still together is a real gift in a miracle.
1:28And I remember, right, like, it's not that common. And there were times I talk about this in the memoir where I would be like, you guys should break up. Like what, what you are not happy. Interesting. And I remember my mom saying to me, like, I know that you think you know everything. I was like 16. You know, she was like you for you, your 16 years are the full picture, but your 16 years are a fraction of our marriage, right? Like we were together long before you got here. So we have had good times and bad times. We've had ups and downs. Like your little window into this is not the full story.
2:03And that was a really important lesson to me in what marriage is that there are like, there are highs and lows. It's a journey. It's a path. And like, if you're committed, you have to be committed for the journey. Um, and that's not to say that I don't agree with divorce and I don't think divorce isn't right for some people that, you know, some relationships are meant to be forever some are for a season like i all of that is true but i think i i had an understanding that marriage as a commitment if you're going to make the commitment it has to be about something deeper than ego like it has something has to keep you if you're going to do it with love and joy and i mean i don't know if i need to say any other word other than love If you're going to do it with real love, then having something deeper to commit to that's bigger than just the two of you is really important.
3:00So I think that's where the spirit comes in. How did you guys create that commitment then from something bigger? What did you talk about? And when things are tough, because, you know, talking about Shadow Force, where the role, the father in the movie, he's kind of taking on the father role and taking care of the kid with you kind of running away and escaping or whatever. You know, I'm not saying this is a parallel to your life, but there are times where you're really busy. You're on set all day, 10, 12 hour days for months at a time. I'm assuming you have to have extra support or your husband's taking the lead in certain areas of parenting.
3:35I'm making assumptions here, but correct me if I'm wrong. Where he has to step up as well. How did you guys communicate the alignment with your guys' careers, separating ego? Because I know he's very successful in what he's done in the past as well, and what he's doing now. How do you separate ego and make spirit and love the center when each one of you are evolving in career as well? so I mean one thing is I'm always careful to talk too much about like the us when he's not in the room because I feel like it's it's interesting it's sort of like with my kids like I don't post a lot about my kids or talk a lot about their inner lives or their journeys because I feel like their story is theirs and they have a right to tell their story in their way and I feel that way a little bit about my marriage too like if we were both sitting here we could kind of agree and co-sign on it but I would say the first thing I thought about when you asked me that question is the importance of therapy because yeah let's go right like individual therapy couples therapy like being willing to have spaces where you do the work and I remember my dad one day being like you guys are in couples therapy like what's wrong and we were like nothing like nothing's wrong it's it is a place where we go to take care of our marriage in the way that i go to the gym to take care of my body or i go to the dentist to take care of my teeth like i feel like as a couple we deserve and therefore we cultivate a place where we care for our relationship and it doesn't come out of crisis it doesn't come out of things that are bad i mean in fact like we spend a lot of time in therapy consciously talking about what we're doing well and acknowledging that for each other.
5:25Cause it's really important to not take for granted that there are good things to celebrate and acknowledge about each other. Right. And so that's, I mean, I, I feel like therapy is a big part of that spiritual commitment. So one of the things I remember my, one of my many therapists saying early on to me was a healthy relationship is not just about like give and take, like I do for you, you do for me, that actually it's important to think about the relationship almost as a third entity that you're both pouring into. It's like a bank account. It's like a spiritual or emotional love account where like, I'm not just doing for him and then he owes me.
6:06It's like, we're both pouring into this thing that matters to us, which is the marriage.
6:19Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of The Daily Motivation, and I hope you have an amazing rest of your day. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to click the link in the description. That will take you to the full episode of our main podcast on The School of Greatness. And if you are loving The Daily Motivation, please follow us over on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review over on Apple podcast right now. And if you want more exclusive content and ad free listening experience, make sure to subscribe to our greatness plus channel on Apple podcast right now. And if you want to get even more inspiration from our world-class guests and learn how to improve your life and take it to the next level, then make sure to sign up for the greatness newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com slash newsletter.
7:09Again, have an amazing day and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.
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Check out the full episode: https://greatness.lnk.to/1768
"We spend a lot of time in therapy consciously talking about what we're doing well and acknowledging that for each other—it's really important to not take for granted that there are good things to celebrate." - Kerry Washington
Kerry Washington opens up about what most people get wrong about lasting relationships. Growing up watching her parents navigate rough patches, she learned early that marriage isn't about perfection—it's about commitment through the messy, uncertain middle. When she was 16, frustrated watching her parents struggle, her mom told her something that changed everything: "Your 16 years are a fraction of our marriage. We've had good times and bad times. Your little window into this is not the full story." That wisdom shaped how Kerry approaches her own marriage today, especially while juggling demanding film schedules and raising kids. She reveals how she and her husband don't wait for crisis to do the work—they treat their relationship like going to the gym, showing up consistently to strengthen what matters most.
What makes this conversation so powerful is Kerry's honesty about separating ego from love when both partners are evolving in high-stakes careers. She shares how they transformed their marriage by viewing it as a "third entity"—not just give-and-take between two people, but something sacred they both pour into. Instead of keeping score of who sacrificed what, they invest in a shared emotional bank account that sustains them through separation, exhaustion, and the chaos of modern life. Her approach to therapy isn't about fixing what's broken; it's about actively celebrating what's working, acknowledging each other's efforts, and creating space to grow together rather than apart.
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